i swear i am okay

The Marauders as Social Networks

James is Facebook. the original one that everyone know and have. thinks is the coolest, is not. still some cool shit happening though, once in a while. have a cool side and a nerd side, bad jokes, some really stupid ones.

Remus is Twitter. witty short answers, and then really long inspiring rants. not as popular but everyone loves it once they try. both great clever observations and opinions and “wher the fuk is my cofee too early fr this shit”

Sirius is Instagram. pretty cool and popular. a lot of selfies. also black and white pictures with deep quotes that represent the tortured soul of the artist. and obviously “LOOK AT THIS STIM IT IS BRIGHTLY COLOURED AND IT MOOVES OMG”

Peter is Pinterest. underestimated and unpopular but you realize once in a while that a lot of good shit comes from here. always ready to help, sometimes clingy ( “we made a SPECIAL BUTTON that appear on every picture you will ever view isn’t that amazing” )

Regulus is Myspace. emo and dead.

anonymous asked:

Are there any birds that eat humans? Where can they be found, and by hat are some things I should know?

Well, not to rain on your parade, but the the first and most important thing you need to know on this subject is that there are no birds that primarily predate on humans. 

We’re very big, very heavy, are very relatively good at defending ourselves, and have a tendency to hang out in groups. Not only that, but we have the audacity to cover most of our vulnerable points with stuff, and we’ve built these extremely non-bird-friendly zones in which we like to live. How unconscionably rude of us, amirite? 

Golden eagles have been recorded taking down sika deer and other medium-sized ungulates, and African crowned eagles have been known to attack children, so there is no question that large birds of prey could kill a human. Carrion birds and scavengers would undoubtedly eat bits off of an already-dead human (sky burials are a good example), but, again, we are not the chosen prey of any extant bird species.

As for extinct birds, even early modern humans were likely preyed upon by strictly non-avian predators. There are Maori oral traditions of the Haast’s Eagle - the females of which could reach up to 15kg (compared to the largest wild birds of prey now at ~9kg) - that state that they “seized and carried off men, women, and children”. However, while they were large enough to hunt their chosen prey, the (also extinct) moa, carrying off adult humans was likely outside of their capabilities

So, tl;dr: humans are really annoying to eat. 0/10, would not recommend.

Conchita in Lisbon last year (from her Instagram).

hunk: awe, lance, your boyfriend is so tiny!

lance: hey! he’s big where it counts!

keith: lance!

lance: your heart, keith, i meant your heart

keith: oh

BTS when they slap you: Jimin version

Ayyyy what’s rolling bishesss 

I’m back with the ‘Slap’ series, and this time it is Chim-chim :)) which means that now only Hosoek and Taehyung are left. 

For Hyung line(without hoseok) click here 

For Jungkook version click here 


You both had been out on a date when you got into a fight and you had said some nasty things but so had he. Not to mention, you had a good reason to be angry.  

You got out of the car before it even fully stopped and and slammed the door shut, making Jimin grip the steering wheel tightly, in efforts to control his anger. He couldn’t though. He stepped out of the car as well and ran after you and closes the door behind him once he enters his apartment. 

“What is your problem?!” He yelled at you, clearly angry with the way you were behaving. You turned around sharply, with an incredulous look in your eyes. 

“What is my problem? Are you seriously fucking asking me that, Jimin? We were out on a date after god knows how many months and you got your ‘rumoured’ girlfriend along?! What the fuck is wrong with me?! No, Park Jimin, what the fuck is wrong with you?!” You yelled back. 

Jimin took a step closer to you, eyes red due to his efforts to keep his anger from taking a form which he might regret. “What the fuck, y/n? You know there’s nothing going on between us! She wasn’t feeling too good, and she wanted me to be there for her. You already know how hard things are for her right now, her career’s taken a hit after the news of the scandal broke out. She is not feeling okay and-” 

“What about me?” You asked him with pure disbelief written on your face. “Did you think about how I felt when my man was being linked to some other woman? Or is she the only person you’re concerned about?” 

Jimin let out a frustrated sigh, he was dangerously close to losing his temper. “Don’t be fucking ridiculous y/n. What you’re going through is completely different from what she is going through. You don’t know shit about our business, you wouldn’t understand. How can you be such an insensitive….bitch? You just walked out of the restaurant while we were having dinner. She must be feeling so awkward. Is this the way you should fucking behave?” 

The only thing you could see was red. “Yeah? what about how I’m feeling? You don’t give a shit how I’m feeling, do you? All you’re concerned about is her.” You let out an angry scoff. “Well, you listen to me you asshole. Do whatever the fuck you want with her. You’ve clearly shown me who you care about. Go. Get out. Go to her and ease her awkwardness. Just let me tell you one thing though, whatever little plan is in her mind, it’s clear to me. Crystal clear. I’m not being fooled.”

Jimin frowned in anger and confusion. “What plan…what do you mean?” 

“If she was that concerned about getting her career back up, she would be avoiding you at all costs right now, Jimin! Why would she accompany you to a public place? If you ask me, she planned this and she wants this rumour to be perceived as tru-” 


You head snapped to your left as you stood there in shock from the impact of his slap. You didn’t bother to stop the tears. You just turned back to look at him with wide eyes.

Jimin stood there shocked looking at his hands, his breathing heavy and shaky, eyes shining because of unshed tears and his hands shaking. He finally turned to look up at you and let out a broken cry as his hands reached out to soothe you but froze as soon as he saw you flinch. 

“No, no..” He stepped forward and fell down to his knees.”I-I didn’t mean to do that, y/n..I…I love you.” He said through his cries. 

“Step away from me Jimin.” You finally brought your hand down from your cheek, you face blank. “We’re done.” 

“NO!” Jimin was suddenly on his feet, your hands in his own, sobbing uncontrollably at the thought of what was going to happen. “No, please, y/n d-don’t leave, okay? Honey, I love you, I SWEAR! I am so sorry, p-please don’t go, hm? Please-” More cries “Don’t leave me, please y/n I swear I won’t ever, ever meet her again. I’ll do everything you say, just don’t leave me. Oh god y/n please..” He fell to his knees, your hands still in his own, looking at you with eyes drowned in tears.

You looked at the man you loved, begging you on his knees to stay and even if your sub-conscious mind was screaming at you to take him back, you couldn’t. You knew your soul wouldn’t forgive you, if you forgave him and let yourself be okay with what he had done. He had just…hit you. 

You yanked your hands back and he let out another cry. Without turning back you picked up your purse and walked out of his apartment, leaving behind a sobbing mess of a Jimin crying out for you. 

Then and maybe forever. 

YAAAAAAAAAAS I’m such an angst-whore I luuuurve it.Tell me how you liked it babies. *Hitting someone is not acceptable at all. Please don’t ever give this pain to someone. Treasure your partner and if you can’t, then leave them. Don’t ever, ever trap them in an abusive relationship. Stay blessed my babies. 🤘🏻


Much love,



Cat Grant Appreciation Week 1/7 
Obviously one of the big reasons I love Cat Grant is that she’s one half of my OTP and like 9 of the reasons that SuperCat is my OTP is Cat Grant but there is so much more to Cat than that. This Cat Grant Appreciation Week I will refrain entirely from using any supercat moments, in order to highlight how much I appreciate Cat Grant even without all the great shipping.

Favorite Scene: Cat x Kara scenes aside, Mrs. Grant, Queen of All Media, CEO of CatCo and spectacular journalist, is so amazing, in part for her ability to inspire others. Besides inspiring an unbelievable amount of fan art, she also inspires people. Thats why this is one of my favourite scenes because it’s one of the first times we see that side of her without the stone-cold boss persona she so easily hides behind. We see her brilliance in action, and the side of her that wants to do good and make the world a better place and inspire people to do better, which is one of the things that made me fall in love with her as a character in the first place.

this beautiful face she makes whatever she’s doing


justin williams answering the important questions, talking about how he styled his hair for picture day (march 27, 2017)


okay but first shawn messing up lyrics on my fav song is my new favorite thing and second…WHY DO THIS SONG MAKES HIM LOOK SO FREAKIN HOT GOD DAMN I NEED EXPLICATIONS RN

xanyxhi  asked:

You know, I've had this in my mind for a while. But, at some point (i forget when) you said something along the lines of villian!izuku sneaking into the class 1A to terrorize the students. And the first thing that popped in my mind afterwards was "... how did he even get into UA in the first place? how did he bypass security?", and now, with the recent post, the question came back in the "mouse man didn't stop me" part, and I can't help but wonder if he let izuku because of reasons...

how did izuku bypass security, indeed. i’m pretty sure izuku could break in, he just might not be able to do that undetected. that’s not his concern, though, he mostly just wants to raise hell for the hell of it. the first time izuku breaks in, he calls the principal as he does so ( “hey, this is [izuku’s villain name here] but you can call me deku!! just to let you know, i’m breaking into yuuei right now to visit bakacchan, but i’ll be out of your hair in a jiff.” ) and gets chased off the premises by aizawa. 

every time he breaks in, he calls the principal, actually. he doesn’t really have to – the security system would detect him and notify nedzu anyways – but it doesn’t take long for nedzu to realize that it’s a gesture of good will. an “i mean no harm” message, if you will. in fact, izuku is quite nice about the whole thing – he never tries to hack the system, and he (usually) stays in sight (when not setting up some kind of trap). nedzu wouldn’t call deku “not a threat,” but perhaps he can say he “has no ill will to the students.” he’s curious, and he does some digging. 

“ah, [izuku’s villain name here]? he’s…something,” says tsukauchi. “he stole my coffee machine the last time he was here, but he replaced it with a small cabinet of alcohol with the instructions for a molotov cocktail taped to it. i don’t know.” 

“he’s been showing up at yuuei quite a lot recently,” nedzu says. “is it worth the time to try and stop him?” 

“no,” says tsukauchi immediately. then, “it’s easier to let him do what he wants. i have been trying to arrest him for years and it never works. he seems to have taken a shine to your school; he won’t do it any permanent harm.” 

“he is a villain,” nedzu reminds tsukauchi. 

tsukauchi sighs. “i know. but he…how do i say this? he’s compassionate, and he cares. i think he might have been a hero if he wasn’t raised a villain, but… well. the first time i met him, he reverse pickpocketed me and gave me ten dollars he just stole from the bank. what’s the point of stealing from the bank if you only take ten dollars? i don’t know. he’s weird, but he doesn’t do irreparable damage. he even helps sometimes.” 

“helps?” nedzu queries. 

“this is off the record,” says tsukauchi, “but [izuku’s villain name] saved some of our deep cover agents, once. he…well, it certainly isn’t legal. but he’s intervened where neither heroes nor police can, before. and i can’t tell you how many times i’ve been investigating a case and some important information mysteriously gets stuck to the bottom of my desk with gum.” 

that seems to be the general consensus from the heroes: deku is a chaotic, destructive villain, but no one has ever been permanently injured or killed by his attacks. “and even his attacks seem more like highly elaborate pranks,” midnight tells nedzu. “he attacked gang orca’s office after it suffered a large-scale villain attack, once, but it was mostly just confetti and a very sparkly game of dodge. then he gave gang orca an amateur attempt at a wedding cake. the office chased him off, but they seemed happier afterwards.” 

nedzu thinks about it, and he watches deku as he tricks yuuei students into fighting smarter and harder. interesting indeed. 

the next time deku calls to tell nedzu he’s breaking in, nedzu says, “why not stop at my office for a talk, first?” 

there is a pause. 

“do you have tea?” deku asks. 

“quite an excellent selection,” nedzu says, and laughs. 

“i’ll be right there,” deku says cheerily, and hangs up. 

the discussion is enlightening. deku never manages to sit still for more than a minute before his attention starts wandering, consumes three cups of tea, and pulls out something that looks a bit like a gutted clock’s innards to fiddle with during their talk. (he also starts to take apart nedzu’s clock before nedzu stops him, at which point he puts the thing away.) nedzu gets the impression that deku is trying to behave, which is really quite entertaining. 

“you may visit yuuei,” nedzu says, “but i have some conditions.” 

“sure,” says deku. “it’s your turf, right? that’s fine.” 

nedzu smiles. “excellent,” he says. well, he was expecting more resistance than that. deku really is strange. “first – no harming the students, physically or psychologically.” 

deku has climbed onto nedzu’s desk and sat himself there in the time it took to say that. “are you sure? is that like, a rule rule? is no fighting allowed?” he looks disappointed. so very disappointed, and he has a truly splendid pair of puppy-dog eyes. 

“no permanent harm,” nedzu clarifies, and is amused by the way deku lights back up. 

“okay, can do!” deku chirps. “what else?” 

they hammer out some ground rules. no excessive property damage; no interrupting a lesson more than twice a week, and not for the same teacher in the same class. things like that. overall, a very productive session. nedzu offers izuku a yuuei ID before he goes, but izuku pulls a face and waves him off, citing the fact that he hates paperwork. the ID isn’t even paperwork – it’s a card – but izuku is not dissuaded. 

probably for the best, nedzu thinks, amused. he peels the tracker disguised as a sticker off the ID. no sense in wasting resources. 

he’ll keep an eye on things, but as long as yuuei students remain unharmed, he’ll do nothing else. 


or, the one where izuku respects nedzu for reasons unknown, and nedzu is amused and takes advantage of this, and nedzu also sits back and enjoys the show.

me every time an acquaintance my age posts an engagement/wedding/pregnancy announcement: time✨to✨pour✨salt✨in✨my✨wounds✨and✨brood✨for✨a✨week✨


Will Be Updated When Needed

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Okay, I really really adore @camilleflyingrotten​‘s Hannistags verse? Like, I LOVE IT. So I… tried to write something for it. Very big translation thank you to @pieofthelord​ and @camilleflyingrotten​ who helped me do Hannibal’s lines on precious little context, I do apologize for that. Other people who speak French, feel free to critique the French once you see how it lines up.

Following on the heels of the last installment

The winter still hasn’t passed yet. There are mild days when I can go out, forage, stretch my legs a bit, but most days I stay curled up in my… our cave now, I guess.

I’ve let him stay with me. Not like I can make him go away, lord knows I’ve tried! He’s pretty handy to have around. At least I’m not hungry anymore. He’s always bringing me things to eat, especially now that he’s figured out I like food more than flowers. It’s sweet, the way he watches me eat with a pleased look on his face. Kinda creepy, but sweet.

And he’s good to have during the night. He must be a mountain stag, he’s got this thick coat that grows all over his body; it’s double-layered, long and bristly on the outside, soft and plush on the inside, very fit for winter. Unlike me, I have a glorified scarf, REAL useful. He puts his back to the door when we lay down for the night to protect me from the draft. I’ve tried moving around, away from him, but he always pulls me back in front of him. It’s taken some getting used to, but… at least I’m not going to freeze to death anymore.

(And his coat is very VERY plush once you get your hands in it. Sometimes I run my fingers over his chest, his fur is so deep I can’t even see my fingers through it. He’s so soft and warm and… but it’s not like I like him! He’s just… handy. Keeps me from dying. That’s all.)

During the day he goes out for long stretches most of the time. Sometimes he comes back with a huge kill, HOW he takes them down I’ll never know, but that’s probably how he got his ear ripped to shreds, taking down something bigger than he is. Or fighting with another stag. I’d hate to see the other guy if that’s the case.

But sometimes he doesn’t come back with anything at all. I don’t ask him where he goes or what he does, mostly because he wouldn’t understand me if I did. But then sometimes he just follows me around, watches me strip bark to build traps or collect grass to make twine.

“Quel travailleur appliqué,” he says, lazily watching me from the first rock to melt all the snow off it, “Est-ce que c’est comme ça que tu te débrouillais, avant que notre rencontre?”

“You know, if you don’t collect resources now, you’ll be playing catch-up all summer,” I nag, stretching for a branch I want to strip.

With a surprisingly quiet whisper for his bulk, he steps over to me and breaks off the branch with hardly a thought. I stare up at him, study his face as he patiently waits for me to take it, and look away briskly, not even saying thank you. I walk away and he follows me, always three steps behind. I’m never out of his sight when we’re together like this. I try not to enjoy it.

Somedays though it’s FAR too cold to go out. Those days are… interesting.

“Bonjour, bel éphèbe” I hear him murmuring to me as I wake up, “Je ne pense pas que tu seras capable d’aller danser dans la forêt aujourd’hui.”

“Mmmm…” I lift my head out of his arms and look over his shoulder. The cave entrance is COMPLETELY stopped up with snow, “Oh my god! We’re blocked in!” I scramble to my hooves and scratch at the ice, but it’s thick, it won’t budge.

“No no no! Don’t tell me I’m stuck in here all day with… with you!” I pull on my ears, panicking as I turn back to him.

“Attends quelques jours, ça aura vite fondu. Nous aurons juste à profiter au maximum d’être ensemble.” He speaks unhurriedly, as if he’s completely fine about being boarded up inside four walls. Maybe he is; I don’t really know anything about mountain stags other than what I know about him. I, on the other hand, can’t stand the idea.

I turn back to yell at him and for the first time I notice the puddle behind him, his damp fur, and the snow crystals still stuck to him. He bore the cold and wind all night for my sake.

I relax instantly and approach him cautiously, “Is that… are you cold?” I reach out to brush the ice from him.

He raises an eyebrow, bemused, completely mystified by my sudden caution.

Hesitantly I flick off some of the snow and ice, “Are you cold?” I repeat, then mime shivering, rubbing my own arms, “Cold.”

Recognition dawns on him and he laughs hysterically, voice bouncing off the walls of the cave.

“Je supporterai bien pire pour toi, mon doux faune.” he smiles, holding out a hand to me. I guess he’s not cold then.

I take his hand and he pulls me onto his chest and abruptly rolls me over onto the wet spot.

“EEEK!” I shriek, wriggling under him, trying to get away from the cold. He laughs uproariously again like he’s just played the biggest prank in the world. REAL original.

“It’s fucking cold! Get off me!” I shove at his shoulders, trying to push out from under him, but he pins me there, face pressed against my chest as his laughter subsides.

“Tu es tellement adorable quand tu cries” he grins at me with a knowing twinkle in his eye.

“Fuck you,” I pout. I have no idea what he said, but I know I’d take offense to it. He just smirks and continues to pull me back when I try to squirm away.

I guess we’ve found something to do then. Annoy the fuck out of each other.

rocketdocket  asked:

hey lorna! so your last fic really inspired me and i'm just your local struggling bisexual with Needs so i'd love a fic where robert really struggles with PDA with aaron one day? it can really be anything... in the village and robert's just having A Day with internalized homophobia/biphobia, or outside of the village somewhere and rob's used to his own little emmerdale bubble where everyone knows and doesn't even blink twice at him and aaron... i leave this in your highly capable hands

anna, this got out of hand, i won’t lie. i have a lot of feelings about robert and internalised homophobia and i could probably write a dissertation on it but i hope you like this ficlet anyway!!

it takes a lifetime

it takes a lot more than a marriage and love to unlearn all the things the world had taught robert he had to be ashamed of. 

or, robert’s internalised homophobia rears it’s ugly head.

Robert woke up that morning with a familiar ache in his chest, a familiar clench of fear that seemed to sink into every inch of his body, every muscle, every thought. He woke up, Aaron curled up next to him looking peaceful, and happy, and totally at ease, and it made Robert feel like he wanted to claw at his skin, an anxious feeling bubbling in his stomach.

Easing himself out of bed, Robert padded across the bedroom, closing the bathroom door behind him. He switched on the shower, sitting on the edge of the bath as he waited for the water to heat up.

Robert didn’t really know why he still felt like this sometimes. He’d been in a relationship with Aaron for close to two years now, and married for one of those years, and yet somehow, for some inexplicable reason, he sometimes still woke up feeling uncomfortable in his own skin.

Trying to shake off his thoughts, Robert stripped off his pyjamas, stuffing them into the laundry hamper that stood by their sink.

Their home. They’d been living in the Mill for close to eight months now, and it really felt like a home, mementos and proof of the life they’d built together everywhere, Aaron’s shampoo standing next to his in the shower rack.

It was all so normal.

It was normal because it was normal, Robert told himself, letting out a sigh of relief as he stepped under the boiling hot shower spray, hoping the water would wash away the queasy feeling he’d woken up with that morning.

He’d be fine if he just walked it off, Robert decided, going through his usual morning shower routine quickly. It was funny, the stark differences between the two of them - Aaron savoured every minute he got in bed in the morning, preferring to shower in the evening time when he came in from work, and Robert was more of a morning person, enjoying how a shower would wake him up before work, before he had to face the day.

Funny, small little differences between them, just like every other couple.

Robert dressed himself quickly, enjoying the feeling of going through the motions as he tucked his shirt into his trousers, buckling his belt tightly. He always took pride in how he looked, always liked how smart and professional he looked when he made the effort, deciding on a maroon coloured tie and a favourite blazer of his that morning.

It’s not as though he had anything special on, just a few meetings and a day in the portacabin, but Robert always felt better when he dressed up a bit. Maybe it was silly, maybe it was entirely vain of him, but as he headed downstairs to start on breakfast, he caught a glimpse of himself in the upstairs landing mirror, and a part of Robert felt more settled.

Felt more like his old self. Robert didn’t miss much of the man he used to be, but he sometimes missed the confidence he had so easily felt, all the time.

Still, he was better now. Better, happier, Robert thought to himself as he made a cup of coffee, the overly expensive coffee machine Aaron had raised an eyebrow at whirling to life, filling the quiet downstairs of the house with noise.

Happier, definitely happier.

The coffee was bitter and too hot as Robert gulped it down, the liquid burning at his insides. He should probably eat, too, but one glance at their cereal selection didn’t give him much of an inclination to eat.

He’d go to the cafe, later, if he got hungry. Robert scooped up his wallet and car keys, covering the speaker on the alarm so he could turn off the house alarm without waking Liv or Aaron up, the tinny voice that called out the alarm was off unbearably loud when the flat was this silent.

The fresh air felt like a relief as Robert stepped outside, sliding behind the wheel of his car.

His car.

He always felt better when he got behind the wheel of his car, windows down and the familiar hum of his engine the only company on the quiet road between their home and the scrapyard, the village quiet.

It was only half seven, after all.

Robert didn’t feel completely settled until he was behind his desk, immersed in the paperwork he needed to catch up on after a long weekend spent with Aaron, and Liv, with the Dingles, Aaron’s madcap family invading their garden for the first barbecue of the year, Victoria providing a small mountain of cakes and salads for the boisterous party.

Robert smiled to himself. That had been a good weekend, hadn’t it? A weekend spent with his family, enjoying the beginnings of the Yorkshire summer. Shaking his head again, trying to shake the thoughts from his mind as he turned his attention to the paperwork.

He must have been at it for hours, but the portacabin door opened around nine, Aaron arriving in, Adam in tow, and a bag from the cafe in hand. “Morning,” Aaron greeted with a smile, setting a cup of coffee down in front of Robert. “You were gone early this morning?”

“Mm, I had an early conference call, client in Germany,” Robert lied easily, taking a sip of the coffee. Americano, two sugars, his usual early morning coffee order, the perfect amount of sweet and bitter, the caffeine loosening out his system, making him feel more awake.

“It go alright?” Aaron inquired, setting one of the bagels he’d clearly bought on his way in down in front of Robert, Adam slumping into Aaron’s desk chair, munching on his own breakfast.

They were always slow to start, after a bank holiday weekend.

Robert nodded. “Ta for the breakfast,” he said quietly, realising now just how hungry he actually was.

“Noticed ya didn’t have anything,” Aaron shrugged, sitting on the edge of Robert’s desk as he ate. It was something Aaron had done a thousand times before, but Robert felt his heart start to race as Aaron bumped a knee against Robert’s, oblivious to Robert’s mounting panic as he told him some funny story about Brenda and the gossip she’d been spreading that morning.

He’d laugh, normally, but Robert felt strangely on edge, turned off his bagel almost instantly.

Aaron finished his breakfast, crumpling up the wrapping and tossing it at Adam’s head before he turned his attention to Robert, leaning in to kiss Robert just as Jimmy arrived to the portacabin, Nicola in tow that morning.

Robert kissed him back for a second before his nervousness turned to blind panic, his stomach churning as he scraped back his chair suddenly, scrambling for his keys. “I’ve got to go,” he said, his heart racing as he made for the door, only half aware of Aaron’s concerned call of his name.

He couldn’t get his hands to work, dropping his keys once, twice as he tried to unlock his car.

“Robert, what’s wrong with you?”

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