i still hate you tumblr

I’m trying to get over you, I’m trying so goddamned hard. And some mornings I wake up and think, yes, maybe I finally am free. Free from my echoing thoughts of you. Free from the constant battle of loving you and losing you. But then other mornings I wake up and all I can think about is how your eyes look with sunlight in them and how your face looks just before you break into a smile.
Maybe we aren’t meant to be together, maybe not now, maybe not ever.
And I don’t wanna have a single grain of hope, because blessed are those with no expectations.
But sometimes I think against my own will that what if we break all the laws?
Maybe we’ll forget each other soon but what if we meet again someday in the future, and in one look we’ll feel the ache in our hearts of our incomplete love, and maybe then I’ll be right for you, and you’ll be right for me?
Maybe we are meant to be together, maybe not now, but maybe someday.

Loving someone with a common name is such a curse.
You’re reminded of them all the time. And that can be a smile when you’re still together but once they have broken your heart?
It’s the worst.
It’s 4 years later and I was having a great morning. I went to college to collect some papers and while entering the library I heard someone say your name and it all came back to me and I almost tripped on the stairs.
It’s not fair. I was okay.

I miss seeing your name pop up on my phone.
Now a days,
I feel so alone.
I just feel so unwanted,
so disregarded on my own.
It felt like you were the person to care for me,
but now there’s no one that’s there for me.
Now you look at her as if she’s the most beautiful thing you have to see,
that’s the way you used to look
at me.
—  a.a.

Yes, I know I have been drinking a lot of alcohol lately.

I have these wounds inside me that need to be cleaned.

—  Christopher Tubb
I still love you but you’re not going to be the one who holds me back anymore. I’m going to cut my hair short and I’m going to move to New York City like I one day told you I would. I’m going to laugh- a lot. I’m going to buy more books than I read. You’re never going to hear from me again. I’m going to change my number and I’ll delete all my old emails. I’ll be out in the world somewhere but it won’t be near you. I will never again soften my edges for you. You’ve never been deserving of that much darling.

this website is literally so toxic and negative like 99% of the time

My mom warned me about you. But then again, she warned me about a lot of things.
—  D.P
I was a rose. You said you loved how beautiful I was. But then you caught a glimpse of my thorns. And instead of handling me with gloves, you decided to stop watering me.
—  and you left me to die // D.P