i still cry over bucky barnes

Anger Issues

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

As requested by anonymous: could I request the same thing where Poe makes the reader cry & makes up for it but with bucky please? i love your writing!!

Originally posted by buckypupbarnes

Bucky just couldn’t catch a break. He lacked sleep because his nightmares were starting to come back. He always had his early morning runs and workouts with Steve so he couldn’t sleep in. He still wasn’t able to go on missions quite yet, and, most of all, you wouldn’t stop hovering over him! It was irritating. You were constantly clinging onto him, kissing him, asking him if he was okay. He was starting to get annoyed!

Bucky found some peace and quiet on the compound’s rooftop. There he just sat down and listened to the world around him whilst feeling the sun and breeze on his face. However, that peace was disturbed when he felt a presence behind him. He knew who it was.

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My Love

BUCKY BARNES x Plus Size Reader

Summary: Reader is in the hospital, all about Bucky and how he’s coping with the situation.

Warning: I think there’s like one curse word and it’s really sad.

A/N: Sorry I’ve been away for so long, kind of hit a small wall while writing and college has been stressful. Anyway, this was requested it’s kind of based off the song My Love by sia. I’ll also be updating Written In The Stars sometime during the week. Enjoy and thank you.xx

Originally posted by thespoilerwitchblog

The room was filled with sunflowers. The yellow hues contrasting against the dull white of the wall Bucky was currently starting at. He hated the flowers, they stood there all tall and bright mocking him. While he sat there feeling all small and dull like the wall behind the stupid flowers. He was numb and broken like the cracks that had started to form through the concrete due to old age. He felt lifeless like the color against the bright yellow. And if someone else walked in with another vase of flowers he was going to explode.

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Ripples - Part 3

Originally posted by wintersthighs

Warnings: Angst. Broken Bucky. Conflicted Steve and Reader….I promise things can only look up from here

A/N: This is angsty af….not going to lie all I want to do is hug Mr. Barnes after writing this drabble. Punch him in the face then hug him lol

Series Tag List: @captainxamerica, @just—love, @senpaiace, @glittercoveredsouls, @findacauseandserveit, @devil-may-cry-11-blog, @agentbarnescarter, @mannatgalhotra @harrisbn @sapphire1727 @ishipmybed @nessy-bearxb @calaofnoldor @cautionconed @badassbaker

Bucky’s POV

Time was irrelevant. It stood still as I sat on the roof of the tower, my legs hanging over the ledge as the rain pelted down on my body. I hadn’t known how long I had been sitting there, or when it had started raining, buts its Sam’s voice that causes me to shift my eyes from the forest horizon and onto him.

He has an umbrella as he walks toward me, a light jacket in tow that he beside me, taking a seat to my right. I look down at the jacket, then at him and he shrugs.

“Y/N,” her name bites at me, like when trying to pull a bullet out of a wound and my arms tense. Sam notices this and gives a slow sigh.

“She…she asked me to bring this out to you. Said you’d catch a cold if I didn’t.”

I don’t want to slip on the jacket but I do. It smells like her, the perfume mingling with the rain and the tears are sliding down my face again. Hot stains that leave me cold inside.

“She’s been working by the roof door all morning. Said she’s worried about you. Wants to talk to you -  clear things up. She’s made me wear my suit just in case you….did something brash. Told her not to worry about that. You know I can’t carry your heavy ass.” he gives a low chuckle but there’s a hint of worry and I turn to him, noticing his flight suit underneath his jacket.

When she did things like this, went out of her way to take care of me and make sure that others did the same, when she did that I remembered why I had fallen for her. When I got to the Tower the only people who spoke to me, really took the time to talk, was Steve and Sam. Everyone else would chat with me for a comfortable amount of time before my silence got to them and they would keep their distance thinking I needed the space.

When Tony hired Y/N, that had all changed. She took her time getting to know everybody but she especially made time for me. She would spend her lunch talking to me - even when i spent months pushing  her away. And why wouldn’t I? She was charismatic and intelligent - beautiful and wise. She deserved better than a broken man who didn’t know his past.

After missions she was the one who always asked how it went for me. No one else - didn’t matter who was injured. She always made it about me.  When I broke my leg a year ago, she was the one dropping off my meals and keeping me company to pass the long hours of being in my head. Going with me to doctors appointments. Helping to heal. Sometimes we would sit in silence, staying in our minds while we did endless tasks. Slowly but surely, she got me to open up to her. She got me to laugh and talk about the old days - another time. She would sometimes speak of her childhood, a glimmer of something happy flickering in those bright of hers.

I got acquainted to her. Got use to her running her hands mindlessly through my hair when Tony and Wanda bullied us into movie nights, my head resting in her lap while she watched some stupid film that Steven and I were supposed to learn about. Got used to her voice when I would wake up from my nightmares, calling her in fear. Only that sweet voice could scare the demons away, her kind words soothing me back to sleep. Got used to the way she started watching me the same way I had always watched her. Those gentle eyes looking at me glazed over with lust, her eyes flicking down to my lips before her tongue licked over her own. Her touches, light yet lingering as she hugged me or sat next to me idly.

In love. I thought that we were both in love.

And then Steve came alone. Perfect Steve.

Why wouldn’t she marry him? He was what every woman wanted. And I was broken.

“And her husband?” I spit out the last part and Sam places a careful hand on my right shoulder.

“Steve’s been worried to but I think he’s….he’s trying to figure out his feelings with her too you know? Think he might like her a whole lot then he’s letting on. Probably wants to stay married because it’s the right thing to do…”

I hadn’t realized my hand was knotted in a fist until it slams down on the concrete ledge, startling Sam. His hands instinctively go for his gun before he realizes that I’m trying to calm down, my eyes closed as I take deep breaths. He sighs and shakes his head.

“This is a mess man. I can’t even imagine - listen I know you and Y/N were just two awkward flirty encounters away from telling each other how you felt.”

“Why does everyone know that.” I mumble louder than planned and Sam laughs, uninhibited and full of amusement. A Sam laugh. A laugh that for a millisecond makes me forget how much pain I’m in.

“Dude, you both are not slick. You basically turn into a pool of puddy when she’s around. And god forbid if she talks to you. She could make you her sex slave if she ever wanted to.”

I chuckle, leaning my head down and I’m flooded with memories of her again. Thinking about how she would comfort me right now, how her hand would unconsciously lift to my left arm - not the metal part. She always liked to caress the part where she knows metal meets skin, her small hands tracing over the scarred tissue  as she listened patiently. She’d coax me to lie on my back, my head in her lap as I looked up to her, telling her all the things that had triggered my mood. She’d only rake her hands in my hair after I told her all, reminding me about all the reasons why I was a good person. That a person’s past sins didn’t dictate the person they were today. How we defined that by how we learned from those actions.

And she knows that I’m a good person.

She always bit her lip when she told me that, her eyes far away and I wondered what she hid from the world, perhaps even to herself. But when she looked back down at me, her lips tugged between her teeth before she smiled at me, I knew it wasn’t for me to ask. She would tell me when she was ready. Instead I would preoccupy my mind thinking about how i thought her kisses would taste.  How her body would feel against mine. How it would be nice to have her in my arms as she worked, pen in her mouth as she review the endless amount of files Tony had her managing. Kissing her forehead and telling her how much I loved her. How I belonged only to her.

A future I imagined.  Gone, just like that.

Sam clears his throat, bringing me back to the present.

“You know Y/N can be pretty cold and distant but she’s a softie for you. And not in the way she empathizes with Bruce. There’s always been something else with you. Mention your name and her lips tug into an involuntary smile…..”

Sam hesitates before he says the next part, allowing me the pleasure of his observation for only a fraction of a second.

“But she’s also always been overprotective of Steve. I….I get why she’d drunkenly marry him.”

When I turn to Sam he’s raising his hands in defense, shaking his head.

“Listen man, I know you probably don’t want to hear that. But Steve always had a small crush on her, I just don’t think he knew it. Sharon did. That’s why she broke up with him - the real reason she did. Tired of him giving Y/N those love sick eyes when she walked into a room. And Y/N respects Steve. Admires him….. You guys…..aww shit, I’m just going to say this once but you both kinda balance who she is - you and Steve. Steve represents the person she’s trying to be - the person she’s chosen to turn into since leaving god knows what evil organization. You represent the person she was…probably the true person that she is.”

I nod, my jaw clenching as I look back at the forest.

“What you’re saying is -  she was going to end up with Steve because he’s the better man.”

“What? No!” Sam says, then stands up.

“Listen man, I think you and her fit better together. She may try to be clean like Steve but it’s not her. She’s like you. She’s troubled. But she’s also pretty damn amazing. A good woman. A woman whose history may be bathed in blood but soul is clean as a whistle. A person who is better than Steve because they’ve survived that type of darkness. That’s why you both fit perfectly. You  both know you can’t ever come back from unseeing and unknowing what you know. ”

He slaps my shoulders but the fresh wave of pain has set in. I thought I’d be good enough for her. She made it seem like I was. As if knowing my thoughts Sam mutters,

“You’re a good guy James. Don’t think you’re not good enough for her. Just…go and talk her.” he turns, walking back to toward the roof door, hesitating before touching the handle.

“….Just don’t tell anyone I gave you a compliment. I got a reputation to maintain.”

I smirk as he leaves as quietly as he came.

Maybe, just maybe, he’s right.

I finally move from outside when I realize that the wind  has picked up and despite the jacket Sam left, I was getting chilled to my bones. I walk into the dim hallway, not surprised to see Y/N’s laptop but curious to where she had gotten off to. I debate leaving it and just hiding out in my room but I know that if know one see’s me, which I could make happen, Y/N would park out here all night.

I couldn’t do that to her.

I grab the laptop and make my way to my room, jumping on the elevator and going down to my floor. It was on the 7th level of the large complex and one of the more isolated floors. There were three bedrooms that belonged to Sam, Steve and I. An office that Tony had converted for Y/N because she liked the peace to get work done - the three of us were pretty quiet. 

I knew the real reason was that it also hosted a large patio deck and she liked the view of the forest. And having quick access to an exit if necessary.

Subconsciously always thinking like a killer. A trait we both tried to disguise.

It was also the main reason why Y/N and I had become friends. Couldn’t avoid her beautiful face when it was one of the first things you walked out to.

I had almost made it to my room when I heard whispering and for a second I think Sam has left his TV on again.   But inching closer to Steve’s room I recognize his dark voice tangled in her soft one. I know I should turn and walk away.

Something pulls me closer.

I walk to the entrance of the door, barely peaking through the cracked space. Not wanting to be known.

Y/N was standing against Steve’s dresser, her arms crossed over her chest. She had changed into capri leggings and a large workout tank top that fell over her body, her chest catching the large fabric and folding against it. The sports bra she wore looked like something Natasha wore and my guess was she borrowed her clothes.

She looked damn good.

Steve had changed into sweatpants and a fitted work out shirt, his hands in his hair.

“Would it really be that crazy Y/N? We did get married.”

She gives a sigh before biting her lip.

“Steve….you literally just got out of a relationship. We got married drunk on Asgardian Ale. I can’t validate staying married when I don’t even know how I feel about you. How you truly feel about me. That’s not even factoring my feelings for…you know no. And don’t say you care because you’re as noble as the energy that lights up a most of New York.”

Steve is silent before saying

“I know that…listen I know that the circumstances aren’t the best. But….I couldn’t forgive myself if I never told you.”

Her eyes furrow together as she places her hands on his dresser.

“Tell me what Steve?”

He gets up from where he was sitting, walking toward her. His eyes betraying something else that Y/N didn’t see. Then he shakes his head.

“Nothing I just - I wouldn’t feel comfortable getting a divorce knowing I didn’t try to work on this. Despite the circumstances wouldn’t it be remissed if we didn’t give this a shot”

Of course he was trying to convince her to stay married. Of course he wouldn’t tell her how he felt about her. 

That would just not be the Steve Rogers way. 

Despite my frustration with him, I can’t help but smile. Only one guy like Steve. 

“Steve…” she starts but he steps closer to her, cutting off the space between them.

“I’m not saying that you should drop everything for me. I know I should just pretend that this marriage thing never happened and let you and Bucky figure things out. But Y/N don’t tell me you haven’t felt this feeling between us before.”

She bites her lip and his hand caresses against her cheek.

I know the spark he’s referencing. I had noticed it before, before I admitted to Steve how much I truly cared about her. Before I even admitted it to myself. I had warned him that he had feelings for her and he always shook it off with a light laugh,

“A lady like that Bucky, a lady like that needs a man like you. Not me. Besides , I’m with Sharon.”

So much for that.

“You want us to have some weird sister wives situation? But like brother husbands…” she bursts into laughter but the reference is lost on both of us.

“Whats a sister wife? Or a brother husband?” Steve asks confused and she laughs harder, shaking her head in his hand.

“Don’t ever worry about it Steve. Its this stupid thing that bored people in Utah have created and now market out to the public via television”

Steve’s face is still complex but the smile tugging on his face reassures her. Better to go in now, when the tension was less thick and leave.

I round the corner, expecting to find them still standing there laughing and shaking their heads. Instead, Steve bends down to kiss her. It catches her off guard. I can tell by the way her limbs instantly tense up, the hard muscles pulling against the soft skin. Her eyes are wide open before the close, her hands rising up to his shoulders.

I take a small swallow, feeling my throat constrict with the motion.  I should walk away. Her hands run down his chest and she pushes away slowly, shaking her head.

“….. Steve, please don’t make me choose.”

He looks down at her as she continues, her eyes glued to his chest.

“We’ve already created a mess. Don’t complicate it with feelings.”

He swipes his hand across her face and she gives an involuntary shiver,

“I’m not trying to make this more complicated. But wouldn’t it be lost if we didn’t give this a try. Even if its for the month. If I can prove to you that I could make you a happy woman - a happy wife, wouldn’t you want to give that a chance?”

She gives another long sigh, her lips between her teeth.

“I don’t want to be your rebound Steve. I never wanted to be anyones wife so playing as rebound wife just sounds like…..hell.”

“You’re not!” he yells this and she chuckles, shaking her head.

“I may be the biggest idiot allowing the most naive man to try to talk me into saying married. But…I’ll think about it ok.”

“That’s all I’m asking.” he lifts her up, her frame light in his arms and she laughs, wrapping her arms around him.  I can’t handle any of it anymore. Like hell I was going to stand around while they slowly fell in love with each other. I clear my throat, pushing my way into the room.

“You left your laptop upstairs.” I mumble, placing the thin metal on his desk. Trying to ignore how my metal hand - my curse- has left imprints on it. They both snap their head at me, Steve instantly placing Y/N down.

Our eyes meet and I know he knows I heard everything.


“Save it Steve,” I looked over at Y/N who has moved past Steve and was walking toward me.

“Wouldn’t want to distract you from winning the heart of your wife.”

The last part hits Steve the way I want it too. I see him flinch from the action and Y/N turns to him briefly before following me out the door, my name on her lips.

I don’t slow down until I hit my bedroom. By this point she’s run to catch up to me, stopping the door with a new form of strength I didn’t think she possesed.

“Can you stop for two goddamn seconds and listen to me.”

“You want me to be courteous to you when you go  and marry my best friend. And don’t have the decency to warn me until he’s telling the whole damn world.”

“I was going to tell you,” she says, pushing her way beyond me and turning around. “Steve was planning on telling the team. We didn’t want you to find out the way you did……you know Steve. And he’s damn good honesty policy. Didn’t think he’d blab to them before I talked to you”

“Then why were the damn wedding band into the house? At least pretend you wren’t happy in love.”

She crosses her arms in frustation.

“Forgot I had the damn thing on to be honest. I’m not accustomed to having jewelry dictating my commitment  to someone else.”

“You appeared to have forgotten a lot of things in the past 24 hours.”

“That’s not fair.” she whispers and I roll my eyes.

“You think finding out my best friend married the person I -” I stop myself. No need to betray something that no longer had the potential to live.

“I know that’s not fair either.” a step toward me. Its calculated but I take a step away from her, turning to shut the door.

“You think finding out that the only two people that I care about, that I trust, decided to get drunk together and go off and get married. Did he seal your union last night too?”

She shakes her head.

“…I don’t think…I don’t remember.”

I snort.

“Perfect. So you probably fucked my best friend and then you expect me to be okay with it.”

“I don’ tknow what I did Bucky. I just remember going off to check on Steve.”

“Leaving me for Steve. Should have seen that coming. Golden boy has an army of women after him now - why wouldn’t you be a part of that group?”

Bitter words that I didn’t know lived in me were coming out. I had to get a handle on this.

“Its not like that! Besides, I know you fucked that stupid little blonde from accounting. Had to go through the security footage to figure out what happen between Steve and I. What about that James? Wanna explain to me why you woke up with some stranger?”

Her eyes were like daggers, glued on me. Knowing good and damn well that she was right. I had no right to demand anything from her when I did stupid shit like that.   

“Fucking some stranger is different than going off and marrying my best friend.”

“Is it Bucky? Because for someone who is always claiming they give a damn about me, seems awful unfair that I’ve been the one alone night after night while you nurse some dumb ho that has flirty eyes for The Winter Solider. In the one who has to deal with escorting them off the premises in the morning and hearing their stupid snide remarks. I’m the one stuck flirting with you, wondering how the fuck you feel about me. You wonder why I went off with Steve? Maybe I was tired on waiting around on you and wanted to be with someone who cared about me. You know what - fuck this Bucky. I wanted to apologize. But fuck this. You should be apologizing to me.”

She’s crying now, the tears consuming her. She was right. I had slept with those women to distract myself from her. I didn’t think I was good enough for her. It was easier to have one night stands with someone I wasn’t invested than thinking about rejection with someone l loved. 

I was just as much as a mess as Steve.

She tries to walk past me and  I grab her out of instinct, my-hands wrapping around her waist.  

“Let go of me.” 

Her voice is venom. Its dark and icy and promises pain. 

“Tell me why you don’t want to marry Steve.” 

She grabs my wrist, I know to pull away but my hands just dig deeper into her flesh. 

“Tell me. Please?” 

Before I can respond she’s twisted my arm behind my back, moving fluid and precise. She’s freed herself as her other hand pushes into my neck. At a pulse point. 

For a second I’m stunned and impressed. She never trained with us -  we didn’t know her potential. Of course she was probably some goddamn top assassin.

“You don’t have that right anymore. You lost it the moment you thought I choose to marry Steve.” 

Then she releases me, exiting my room quickly. I groan, sitting on the bed and putting my head in my hands. 

How the hell was I supposed to navigate this mess and win her heart?

conservations with mum involve...

mom: so do you have any crushes?

me: *still crying over fictional characters played by 30+ year old celebrities that STILL don’t know i exist* it’s just me, myself, and i mum. :)


For anon…reader is 10 as requested, enjoy!

Vision cocked his head to the side in curiosity as he watched you curled up on the couch. You were currently sobbing your eyes out into a pillow. He knit his brows as he walked over.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” he asked.
You sniffled. “B-Bucky should be h-home.”
“He’s needed on a mission,” he pointed out tactlessly.

You quickly devolved into another series of wails. Still confused, Vision inched closer.

“I think I should call Mr. Barnes,” he murmured.

Before he could do anything, the elevator opened. You sat up straight, halting your crying for a moment.

“Y/N?” the voice called.

You sprinted from your spot and into Bucky’s arm. You continued to sob into his chest. He furrowed his brows in worry.

“What’s wrong, kid? Is everything okay?”
“She seems to miss you,” Vision stated.
“Y-You should-dn’t be leaving,” you wailed.

Bucky smiled softly before hugging you tightly. He could only hope you would understand how important these missions were.

Want to Request? : Submit Here

Fancy a Roll in the Hay? (Pt 2)

Here is part 2 already! I am on a roll! I also found appropriate gifs for this part too so enjoy! Also it’s gunna be 3 parts now. I thought of more I wanted to add! Enjoy! xox

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
Part 13
Part 14
Part 15
Part 16
Part 17
Part 18
Part 19
Part 20
Alternate Ending

“Sure?” You say, slightly wary. Was this the part that he took you into a shed somewhere and killed you then fed you to pigs…? You stood and followed Bucky out of his house into the evening light. It was cooler now than earlier, and Bucky grabbed a tshirt that had been hanging just inside his door and pulled it on before continuing.

“So this land I haven’t started working on yet.” He explains, gesturing towards the long grass you’d walked through to get here. “Most of my stuff is round the back.”

“So what kind of farming do you do?” You ask as Bucky leads you round the side of his house.

“Well I have some animals. A few cows and pigs, some chickens. That’s mainly for food though. I have two main exports coming out of this farm.”

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I cry during movies. I cry because they’re heartbreaking and they’re beautiful and I’m so caught up in them that I forgot about the real world. And then the movie ends, I wipe my eyes, and i go and pretend that my heart hasn’t just been ripped out.
The real crying comes later. It comes at night, when I don’t have to pretend. I have the time to think, to reflect over the details-over shared lines, looks, characters who leave then come back in for a hug-and then I cry. Because there is no closure with this. I can never forget Dobby dying, or Lucy and Edmund saying goodbye for the last time, or Frodo sailing away into the west. Steve trying to get drunk after Bucky falls, Aslan dying at the stone table, Wanda when her brother has just died and she feels as though her heart has been torn out. I obsess over the minutiae-tiny details which make me sob into my pillow and then look for more-and I love with my whole heart.
So no, it doesn’t end when the movie ends: it lasts so much longer than that. I’m still crying.

I don’t like bullies

(A/N): Is it problematic I rewatch the captain america series every weekend? Like, I have the movies memorized I swear

Request: Can I request a BuckyxReader where reader is Steve’s sister, she’s known for being a sweetheart but then someone insults Steve and she kicks guy’s ass and Steve and Bucky recall the times she’s fought in their name because she hates bullies too? XO

Warnings: some swearing

Tags: @mcuimxgine, @ifoundlove-x0vanessa0x

Originally posted by stevesupallnighttogetbucky

   (Y/N) was an absolute sweetheart, almost the epitome of their older brother, kind and compassionate, sweet and timid, and everything in between but god help the poor soul who ever laid a finger on them or anyone they remotely cared about. While (Y/N) was deceptively kind looking they did have a rather scary side that would just so happen to come out at the slightest mention of a bully. 

   Throughout (Y/N)’s entire life they had to deal with bullies, not because they themself were bullied but because their older brother Steve was, alongside with his best friend Bucky. From the day (Y/N) knew what bullying was was the day they would no tolerate the mistreatment of their older brother. Even after all these years, when Steve and Bucky were old enough and strong enough to take care of themselves (Y/N) was still there to beat the living hell out of someone if they so much as uttered something rude about them, just like now. 

   The three were on an undercover mission together, pretending to be on a family vacation so they could track down some prized item that Tony made the mistake of losing. So far nothing had set them off, everything seemed to be normal, they had stayed in their personas for the entire mission, and there was no sight of the object they were hunting. Everything had been going swell- well, as swell as an undercover mission could go when suddenly some wise ass man from across their table made some remark, just loud enough for (Y/N)’s ears to catch up on. 

   “God, look at those two, they look like complete douchebags,” (Y/N) knew it was only an offhanded comment meant not to be heard by them so they elected to ignore it until the man spoke up again. “You think the other one’s with them?” Even without having to look (Y/N) knew that the slimy looking guy was staring right at them, no doubt drunk off the copious amounts of fruity drinks he’d consumed. “Damn, they could do way better than either one of them-” Finally (Y/N) had had enough of this mistreatment, not only of Steve and Bucky but now of themself. Rising from their chair, damn near seething at the man, they marched over to his table, completely ignoring the hisses of Steve and Bucky to return to the table. 

   “Excuse me, sir,” (Y/N) smiled sweetly even if a look of murder was hidden in their eyes. “I couldn’t help but hear what you were saying- about my brother and boyfriend,” (Y/N) gestured to Steve and Bucky behind them, the two smiling shyly at the man, clearly having no clue what was going on. 

   “Yeah?” The man smiles, leaning forward onto his elbows as he looked up at (Y/N) innocently, making (Y/N) feel sick to their stomach. “It’s true honey, why don’t you ditch those losers and join-” The man stops when (Y/N) grabs him by his shirt collar, hoisting him up into the air with the simplest of ease. 

   “You wanna fuckin’ talk about them like that, huh?” (Y/N) smiled that same sweetly smile, this time the smile was laced with a dangerous poison. Everyone around the two either scattered or moved away, staring at (Y/N) with a nearly horrified expression luckily Steve and Bucky were quick to react, diffusing (Y/N)’s temper before it got out of hand. 

   “(Y/N),” Bucky coaxed (Y/N) away from the man, aka gently removing them from him as they clung to his shirt with an inhuman like grip. “Stop, come on, drop the guy,” Steve was on the other side of (Y/N), doing the same exact thing, trying to coax (Y/N) into letting the man down. The man stares at them absolutely horrified, his eyes wide and jaw slacked as he looked between the three. With a rather impatient growl (Y/N) dropped the man, giving him one harsh threat before turning on their heel and marching away, most likely to lock themself in their room and feel guilty for lashing out. That’s what usually happened after stuff like this, (Y/N) would get mad at a bully, give them a good lesson and immediately feel guilty afterwards, guess it was just in their shy nature to feel that way. 

   “Should we-” Bucky begins, only to have Steve cut him off a moment later. 

   “No, just let ‘em work it out themself,” Bucky stares after (Y/N) longingly, wishing nothing more than to go comfort them but Steve’s voice interrupts his thoughts. 

   “Remember than one time back in kindergarten when (Y/N) kicked the teacher because she said you weren’t as bright as all the other kids?” Bucky chuckles as he recalls the memory, nodding his head. Even though it was over 70 years ago he could recall that sunshiney day perfectly. 

    It had been just that, a perfectly sunshiney day, a perfect day to go out and play amongst the trees. All the other kids were doing it and Bucky thought it looked like fun, so why not join in? So Bucky, small, kindergarten Bucky decided to climb a tree, nothing too big or anything, just a simple tree. He’d gotten up at least halfway before he realized that he was going to have to get down somehow and suddenly this didn’t seem like such a good idea anymore. So rather than climb the rest of the way up he began to climb down, losing his footing on more than one occasion.but he’d always been able to stay up, never falling. It wasn’t until a shrill cry of ‘James Buchanan Barnes’ filled the air that Bucky truly fell, knocking the wind from his tiny body in the process. 

   Bucky then laid upon the ground, wincing as he attempted to breath once again. 

   “James Buchanan Barnes,” His teacher yelled, stomping her way over to where he was. “What in heaven’s name do you think you’re doing?” Bucky stared up at her with wide and fearful eyes, his back and chest still stinging from the fall. 

   “I was just trying to climb the tree miss,” the teacher had sighed, picking up Bucky and dusting him off as she stared at him with what Bucky thought to be kind and sympathetic eyes. 

   “Well-” She sighed, “I guess we can’t all be as bright as everyone else can we?” Bucky had thought nothing of it, merely thinking it was his teacher making some offhanded comment, (Y/N) who stood only a few feet away, did not. Without even a second of hesitation (Y/N) scurried up and kicked Bucky’s teacher in the leg, glaring at her with a childlike expression. The teacher let out a yowl of pain, clutching her leg as she too glared at (Y/N). 

   “(Y/N) Rogers, what do you think you’re-”

   “Bucky’s  smart!” They had exclaimed, their voice high and soft, just as a young child’s would be. “He’s the smartest kid I know! In fact I think he’s smarter than my older brother Steve, and he’s real smart!” Bucky had smiled at (Y/N)’s protective nature, even if the teacher had disapproved of both Bucky and (Y/N). 

   Needless to say they both got in trouble with their parents that night but Bucky would never forget the way (Y/N) had stood up for him. 

    “What about that time in highschool when uh- damn,” Bucky smiles a bit, “I can’t remember his name- that old football guy, big, square head?” Steve nods, smiling as he recalls the memory. 

   “Yeah, I know him, but I can’t for the life of me remember his name,” 

   “Well uh- what about that time (Y/N) nearly jumped that guy after he made fun of your size?” Steve nods, smiling fondly as he recollects the time, and many times after that (Y/N) had stuck up for his small size, resulting in more bloody knuckles on their part than he’d like to remember. In fact, more often that not (Y/N) was the one to swoop in and save the day, sparing both Bucky and Steve from countless fights and years worth of humiliation. 

   “How about that time your date was a complete ass to you so (Y/N) showed up at her doorstep and demanded she come and apologize?” Steve chuckles heartily, shaking his head in amusement. 

   “I’m sure they did the same for you,” 

   “No,” Bucky smiles, shaking his head. “They just took me on the dates instead,” Steve smiles, his heart warming in his chest as he thought about just how amazing his younger sibling was. He was damn lucky they tested on them during the war too otherwise he’d be completely alone in this new world, save it be for Bucky. “You know, they’re just like you,” Bucky whispers, nodding his head to his own comment. 

   “Yeah?” Steve turns to look at Bucky, his smile only growing. “How so?”

   “They don’t like bullies, don’t care where they’re from,” 

so i went to phoenix comicon today. me and my two friends were wandering around the exhibition hall and spotted a bucky and cap cosplay duo posing for pictures. suddenly, my friend is like “yo what if i read bucky the list of words from civil war??” and we immediately ran to the side and pulled up the list of words and he went up to bucky and read them off and bucky said “ready to comply” and my friend pointed to cap and said “attack him!”
you know what bucky did?
and cap just turned around and was like “what”


Thank you for the request! Rose and I weren’t completely sure what you meant (for me I was a tad confused powerwise initially) but I’ve taken a stab at it. Sorry if the angst/floof is lacking in places, as any angst or floof I write just, you know, appears without me realising, so I’m not the best writing it purposefully. But yeah, I hope this was what you were wanting!

I’ve been writing this while being deadly ill and dancing between two Spanish exams, an English Literature exam, and a higher Biology exam, so forgive me for any writing-quality-drops. Another point is I’ve never written a fight scene before, so sorry about the shortness of this. ALSO HOLY COW THIS IS THE LONGEST FIC I’VE POSTED HERE! Duuuuuuude. This is 2647 words long!

Also Rose and I have sorted out some sort of schedule of what we’re gonna post when, so hopefully we’re going to be posting twice a week regularly!

This is also a reminder that our requests are STILL OPEN!

                               ~ Rachael

Originally posted by stucky-romanova-stark

Originally posted by emlereo

I wiped the sweat from my brow as I jogged on the treadmill. My soles slapped against the plastic, echoing across the gym. I really needed to build up my muscles more if I was going to rely on my body more than my powers. I turned the speed up and closed my eyes, bouncing to the beat of my footsteps. Blood pulsated in my ears to the beat of my feet. As I finally got into the swing of running, I felt a pair of arms swing around me affectionately and another pair of feet fall in line with mine.

“We’ve got a mission [Y/N],” Bucky smiled into my ear.

I turned the treadmill off and turned to Bucky, wiping a mixture of sweat and hair out of my eyes. I gently shoved him off of me, chuckling. It was funny to think that the Avengers had ‘known’ me for 6 months and they already treated me as family, or more. However, no one actually knew me. Tony scoured internationally for my face and barely scraped the surface of my identity. Wanda could only pull minor thoughts now and again when my guard was down. Everyone thought they knew me from head to toe, when really they didn’t know half of it.

“Terrorists, aliens or Hydra?” I replied, forcing my hair back into a bun, pushing those thoughts from my mind.

“Hydra,” he frowned. I stiffened slightly. Why was Bucky being sent on a mission to do with Hydra, when everyone knew that was extremely risky? I shook my head, sighing irritably. I heard Bucky make a sound of agreement. Looks like he didn’t think this was a good idea either. But hey, he had Nat and I, and I was not going to let him out of my sight once we were in the enemy’s territory.  

“Briefing’s in ten”, Bucky said, kissing my forehead, “Now I’ll going to leave you to change, m’lady.”

“Good,” I grinned, rolling my eyes.

Keep reading


It’s the one word that continuously gnaws away at his soul and tarnishes his will to survive. It comes in many forms and breeds in every environment. It seeps into his heart slowly, surrounding him like fog during the night. The essence of the emotion is captured in his metal arm, with the red star as a sign of its immortality. It draws blood and has the ability to detonate and destroy entire continents. The dangerous feeling corrupts his mind and blurs the line between right and wrong.

With it, good men become ghosts of what they once were. Grief creates an entity that terrorizes countries and slaughters innocent lives with no remorse. And, while it may simply appear that he feels nothing at all,

Grief, in it’s final form, manifests itself through James Buchanan Barnes.

Keep reading

Ice Ice Baby Part 8/8 FINAL!! Bucky x Reader Steve x Reader

A/N This is nothing but fluff guys.. I’m so serious. I gave myself so many emotions and I had to walk away at one point to compose myself. This is the last of the IIB Series, so I just want to thank you guys for jumping on board and giving me your feedback. It’s been fun!

Part Seven

“Okay, Y/N. This what we’re here for. Time to push!”

The doctor settled down on her stool at your center. Her team stood at the ready and your grip on the super soldiers tightened more in anticipation.
“You’re almost there, baby.” Bucky kissed your temple, rubbing his thumb over the back of your clenching fist. Steve stroked over your beyond disheveled hair, not saying a word. He wanted you and Buck to share this. He only stayed because you had asked him to.
Push after push, you groaned. Each contraction was getting sharper than the last. Tears were trying to slide down your face, but nothing came out. You were beyond done with this whole ordeal.

“I can’t,” you gasped out after a particularly long push, “I can’t push any more. I’m so tired, Buck.” You dropped your head and you were facing him.
“I know, baby girl.” He rested his forehead at yours, keeping his eyes locked with your heavy gaze. “You’ve come so far, Y/N. You’re so close.” He ran his nose along yours, earning a weak smile from you. “You can do this. Tell her, Steve.” Bucky shot a pleading look to his silent friend. He knew that if anyone else could get her to push through, it was Steve. Steve swallowed back the lump that had been sitting at the back of his throat. He traced the tips of his fingers along your jaw and you looked over to see him, his own blue eyes meeting yours.

Keep reading

My little brother has just started watching the Marvels. We’re in the middle of Captain America first avenger. He’s only eleven and he’s basically crying over Bucky. (know the feeling kid) He just asked me if Steve and Bucky are friends in Winter Soldier and if Bucky’s happy. My sister and I are still laughing and crying. 😭😭😭😭


“Bucky,” Steve coaxed gently, seeing his best friend sitting in the room by himself, fiddling with his fingers. “She left… She left.” He whispered to himself, staring at the blank wall ahead. Steve bit down on his bottom lip, shaking his head. You and Bucky had been having some issues lately, most of which you could solve and carry on. However, you were fed up. You finally broke and told Bucky you two needed to just take a break from one another; possibly clear your heads.

“I’m sure she’ll be back.” He said with a half-reassuring tone. Deep down, he didn’t truly know for a fact what your intentions were. All he understood at this moment was that he had a broken best friend who needed to be repaired quickly.

“Steve,” He looked up with tear filled eyes. “S-She’s my entire world. How can I let go that easily?” He mumbled, the tears pouring faster. Steve’s heart shattered at the sight. He rushed over to him and sat down, pulling Bucky into him. “Give her some time, Buck.” He advised him.

“I-I need her!” He hissed, his voice cracking from the cries that erupted from him.


A/N: wow, that was kinda sad for me. Seeing this little gem cry is something hard to deal with… Glad you guys are enjoying the imagines. I promise, I’m still going. Much more where that came from. ;) 

Fic snippet

Not Bid Time Return, but a piece of something I promised forever ago. 

How Bucky found out Darcy’d been kidnapped by Hydra. 

A spring thunderstorm rumbled in the distance; an angry murmur above the rush of cars on the street below his window. He’d opened it an inch or two on a fleeting thought that begged for light and air in the dim, claustrophobic apartment. There was no breeze yet; the sky above the city was stagnant, humid and heavy with dirt and exhaust, but he could smell the dusty wet scent of rain.

Another rumble. Closer. For a second, then two, then three, he lost the city, lost the traffic and noise, and heard another rumble. Boom. Boom. Boom. A tempest of sound and chaos that tore the earth in its rage. Artillery in the distance, black smoke. Death marching forward.

Taking a deep breath, James Barnes turned away from the window. He should call her. When the screams got too loud, it helped to hear another voice.

Dropping onto his musty, lopsided couch, he pulled out his phone. The one she gave him with no strings attached, no tracker, the only price she asked that he call.

Staring at the phone, he ran a silver thumb over the smooth face of the device. Then, caught by the sight of his own false limb, he turned his hand over and considered the metal lines across his palm. She’d taken his hand in hers. He could still feel the warmth of her fingers running over those lines. He could still feel the gentleness in her grasp. He could still see the pain and rage in her eyes. Pain and rage for him.

Darcy Lewis was a mystery. After they met, he spent a day wondering if she was real at all, of if she was just a hazy dream in the swirl of his mind. He’d wondered if she was simply a hope that somebody somewhere would forgive him someday. Then he found the paper with her looping scrawl, her number, her name, in his jacket pocket. The paper was still in the jacket, a reminder. Though, he’d moved it from his pocket, plucked at a little seam, and tucked it, hidden, in the lining. It had been there long enough now that it no longer crinkled when he moved, the paper worn soft. He never looked at it, had no reason to, but he knew it was still there.

Even with confirmation that she was no figment of his foggy, hazy mind, he puzzled over her. Knowing what he was, knowing what he’d done, how did she sit down with him? How did she hold his hand so gently? With the weight of all those searching for him, why did she stand against them and keep her word to him time and again? Only days after he’d torn SHIELD apart, her agency, she sat with him. She never blinked and never shied away from him. Instead she reached out to him and he found himself reaching back.

Running his hand down his torso, he poked at his side. The wound from Estonia was gone, healed, only a fading pink scar left, and in another week even that would disappear. Another story, another memory, erased from his skin. She’d refused to leave him, she’d pushed and pulled and nagged and pressed her weight on the wound, holding him together. Then she brought him right into SHIELD’s hands. He’d been too tired, too hurt to refuse her, but he didn’t trust them. He waited for guns, and rough hands, and shouted commands. But, she made him promises, and SHIELD kept them. He’d be damned if he knew how she did it.

Or maybe he did know. That big personality, that stubbornness, that Goddamned certainty she was always right. Her crazy, extraordinary loyalty that demanded loyalty in return. If she gave her word, then others better damn well keep theirs or there’d be hell to pay. The Director of SHIELD didn’t come pick them up because of a broken old assassin, he came for her. He felt the heaviness of Agent May’s warning that he’d regret it if he hurt her. He saw the others accept him because she did. They were afraid, they were curious, but they patched him up, and cleaned him up, and gave him clothes and food. Then they let him walk away. Because she asked them to.

Darcy Lewis was baffling. But, she was steady. It would be so easy to lose himself, what was left of himself. To drift into his rage and hurt and horror, and fall back into the bloody world he’d lived in for so long. But he clawed and fought for some sort of sanity, for each and every one of the thin ropes of memory he could pry free from the chaos in his head. Some days it was too much, and it would be all too easy to let himself drown. And then she’d be there. Every time his head got light and he slipped, she was there. There at the other end of a phone call, there in California, there in Estonia, here in this apartment when he couldn’t reach the wounds on his back. She wouldn’t go away, and he couldn’t make her.

She was loud and she was brash and she talked too much. And she wasn’t afraid of him. She’d yell at him and laugh at him. She’d tend his wounds — bitching the whole time — and she’d make sure he’d eat. And all the while she gave him pieces of her life. Did she know how dangerous that was? To give that information to an assassin? Maybe she did. She bound him to her and wouldn’t let him fall.

But what if the weight he was carrying was too much? What if he pulled them both down? He didn’t want to do that, he really didn’t want to do that. She deserved better.

Thunder rumbled again and the hell of his past crashed along with it. He lifted the phone and called up her number.

“Hello? Darcy?” A woman’s voice answered the call. The wrong voice.

He frowned and the mad chaos in his mind stilled, concentrated on this one point: that was Darcy’s phone, but that was not Darcy. “Who is this?” he growled.

“Who is this? Where is Darcy?” the woman demanded, an edge of hysteria in her voice.

He stood up and paced back to the window, looking through the peeling paper. Fingers twitching for a gun or a knife, he took a deep breath.

“Bucky? Is this Bucky Barnes?”

The wind finally picked up, pushing through the still apartment. He felt the cool brush against his still flesh arm. “Who is this?”

“This is Jane Foster. Darcy’s boss. Is this Bucky? Tell me this is Bucky.”

Stillness shuddered and failed. He knew Foster from Darcy’s stories. Why was she … ? “Yes.”

“Thank God,” Foster sobbed, a small cry of relief. He didn’t remember anybody being relieved to hear his voice. “She’s missing. Darcy’s missing.”

Another sort of coolness fell over him. The Soldier’s winter. “When?”

“Two days ago. I didn’t know how to reach you,” Foster said, almost accusing. “I’ve been waiting. She didn’t put your number on her phone. She, God, she wrote a program to mask it on the network. Jarvis has been trying—”

He cut her off. “What happened?”

“Director Coulson thinks it was Hydra.” Foster took a deep breath. “She was driving upstate, her car was forced off the road. We got a call from the State Police when they found the car.”

His jaw clenched. Did they know about him? Did they know about her? Did they take her because of him? No, they couldn’t. He was careful. There were other reasons somebody would grab Darcy. She was a SHIELD agent. She worked with the Avengers. They would have known her, if not who she was. They would want information from her. They would take her somewhere they could take their time. If they were watching her, they’d know she was close to the Avengers. They wouldn’t want to be found. They had to know somebody would come for her.

Foster was still talking, but her words were a distant murmur. Until she yelled. “Bucky!”

“I’ll find her,” he said.

“Wait, you … God, you need to call in.” Foster ordered, her voice cracking again. “You need to call Steve. If you had, if you … maybe she wouldn’t … God, you have to—”

“I’ll find her,” he repeated.

He disconnected the call and picked up his weapon trunk, tossing it onto the couch. As he sorted his gear, he let himself fall into that spinning chaos in his mind, drifting from moment to moment as he thought of every place he’d ever been, every facility he knew, every memory of Hydra he had, no matter how grim. He pulled every thread, and he followed them to every bleak gray bunker or gilded room.

A map formed in his mind, the lines of Hydra’s long reach spanning the globe. One by one he categorized each location, each black spot, from least likely to most. All the places they could hold her and all the places they would.

There was enough Bucky Barnes left that he shoved his tactical clothes into a duffle next to his rifle rather than wear them out the door. Darcy would tell him to be subtle. He paused as feral rage swept through him, the muscles in his arms, in his jaw, quaking and trembling with it.

Darcy Lewis was a lot of things, and maybe he’d never understand her. But, in the confused surge of memory and thought in his mind, there was a solid, steady mooring. One of the places where what was left of James Barnes was tethered. That was Darcy Lewis. And in her strange, crazy smart brain, she’d decided he was worth holding onto. She’d decided he was hers.

She’d made promises to him. Now, he would make promises to her.

He’d find her and he’d kill them all.



It’s the one word that continuously gnaws away at his soul and tarnishes his will to survive. It comes in many forms and breeds in every environment. It seeps into his heart slowly, surrounding him like fog during the night. The essence of the emotion is captured in his metal arm, with the red star as a sign of its immortality. It draws blood and has the ability to detonate and destroy entire continents. The dangerous feeling corrupts his mind and blurs the line between right and wrong.

With it, good men become ghosts of what they once were. Grief creates an entity that terrorizes countries and slaughters innocent lives with no remorse. And, while it may simply appear that he feels nothing at all,

Grief, in it’s final form, manifests itself through James Buchanan Barnes.

Keep reading

theyoooraeken-deactivated201511  asked:

Stucky and 12) Things you said when you thought I was asleep (because my feels feel this would be feelsy)

Bucky woke up slowly. He was pleasantly warm, securely wrapped in the mound of blankets that smothered his and Steve’s bed. Their weight and warmth and softness were a comforting remember every time he woke up of who he was and where he was. The hot press of Steve against his back didn’t hurt either. They were both wearing boxers, too tired when they’d gotten back from the mission the night before to do much more than collapse into bed together, but Steve’s chest was still plastered against Bucky’s back, their legs intertwined.

Bucky had discovered, to his absolute delight, when he and Steve started spending the nights in the same bed, long before they started doing anything else in bed together, that Steve was an absolute octopus in his sleep. He hadn’t used to be – the few times before the war and during when they’d shared a bed for warmth it had been perfunctory, either Steve resenting needing Bucky to stay alive or Bucky still shying away from touch after everything Zola had done to him. Now though, now was a entirely different story.

He didn’t know if this was just a natural development in Steve now that he was no longer angry all the time about needing anyone’s help, or if it was a reaction to losing Bucky then finding him again, or if it had something to do with all the years he had spent alone and frozen and lost. Bucky wasn’t sure he wanted to know. Besides, no matter why the change, the fact remained that however they fell asleep, Bucky always woke up with Steve wrapped around him, face nudging into the long hair at the back of Bucky’s head, arms wrapped around his chest and legs tangled, leaving Bucky feeling secure and warm and loved. It was, alongside the ISS and pop music, one of his favourite things about the future.

Waking up slowly was a privilege fought for in hours of therapy and days spent remodelling the apartment to his specifications and Bucky savoured it every time, the feeling of his eyes blinking open slowly and awareness of the space around him fading in. It took him several minutes to register that the noises he was hearing weren’t from the city outside the window, but were being whispered by the mouth pressed against his neck, soft lips brushing gently against his skin as Steve spoke. He frowned slightly, easing into full consciousness even as he carefully kept his breathing even and his muscles relaxed, giving  no outward sign that he was awake.

“-we were maybe fifteen? You’d just broken up with Minnie O’Connor. You took a bottle from your fathers cabinet even though you knew you’d catch a fist for it later. We climbed up onto the roof and smoked and got so fucking drunk… I don’t think I ever saw you so drunk again until the war. You were telling me some stupid story, about Richie and his crew, down at the docks. You’d only had that job for a couple months and I was sure everyday you’d lose it because of the shit you’d start with them.” Steve huffed out a laugh against Bucky’s neck that was more air than sound. 

“I remember that I looked over at you… The moonlight was the only light reaching the rooftop and my vision was so bad then, I could barely see you. But I remember, I looked over at you, you were looking up at the moon and laughing, and then you turned to me and grinned, your face lit up with the cherry glow of your cigarette and I thought ‘I’m in love with him’.” Steve paused, shifting. 

“It wasn’t even a surprise, not really. I mean, I hadn’t thought it before, hadn’t considered the possibility, but as soon as I did, it was so obvious and so… natural that it didn’t even give me pause. Besides,” Bucky could feel the smile Steve pressed into his shoulder, “it wasn’t like i was winning any favours with the ladies from church as was, and me and God had been fighting for a long time ‘afore I realized I was sweet on you.” Steve shifted again, and when he spoke again his voice was quieter, rougher. 

“I never told you and I always regretted it. I regret it now, with how fucked up your memory is, that I… I can’t tell you. I don’t blame you for that, but god, if I could do it all over again, I’d steal us both away from the war. Propose to you with my Ma’s old ring, run off to Canada. Say fuck it to the world. You and me Buck, that’s all I’ve ever needed. All I ever wanted and I almost missed it… almost lost it all without ever having it because I was afraid, because I couldn’t bear the thought not that you wouldn’t want me, but that you would run from me. That it would change things, that even if I didn’t lose you I’d still lose you. And I couldn’t do it Buck. I can’t do it. I can’t lose you.” Steve’s breath caught on a sob and Bucky couldn’t stay still anymore, turning over to wrap his arms around Steve, who startled before crumpling into Bucky’s chest. He wasn’t crying but his breath came rough and fast as he pressed his face into Bucky. He ran his hands over Steve’s bare back, hushing him. 

“I always loved you Steve,” Bucky finally said, voice rough, “I don’t need memories to know that. And I will always love you, no matter what. Nothing can keep us apart forever, not time, not ice, not Hydra. Not death.” 

“Nothing will ever stop me loving you.”

spaceconfessional  asked:

Steve saw Bucky go down, a hard fist to the back of the head. The other Avengers heard his cry but couldn't get to him before Steve. Shouldn't have brought Bucky out here, still too soon for him to fight. Cap tries to shake him awake, get his attention, anything, just open your eyes, Bucky. He finally does. Except it isn't Bucky Barnes looking back at him. It takes a minute but Steve remembers the cold, calculating eyes of the program taking over. The Winter Soldier Program started running again

all I can see is Clint yelling at Steve over the comms to “COGNITIVE RECALIBRATION, COGNITIVE RECALIBRATION.”