i started this blanket in december

Valerie

Authors Note: I am honestly running out of ideas on what to write about for Shawn, I do not know what scenarios you guys would like to read. But, here is Daddy!Shawn, it is kinda cute. 

Shawn Master List found HERE

I am not sure who asked me to tag them when I post tea-party Shawn, I am starting to think it was all a dream bc everybody is telling me it wasn’t them.  So, I am just going to give a small shout out. Here are some lovelies that have allowed me to blow their messages up with things. 

@ihaveabadreputation @hemmingshood12 @bleedingonedirection @dailymendes01 @redcalvinsharry @honest-for-mendes 



Since the moment he casted his eyes on her Zinnwaldite Brown eyes, he was hooked— there was nothing else in the world more important than the baby girl swaddled in his arms—her pastel pink blanket wrapped around her tiny little body.

From the moment Valerie Anne arrived in the world on December 13th, weighing 7lbs, he did everything possible to keep her happy, from driving around at three in the morning to get her to sleep for a few hours, to cradling her on his chest late at night while she stays wide-eyed and cooing.

It’s no surprise when you find the two of them taking naps, cuddled up on the couch, or in the king size bed, he is always making sure to spend as much time as possible with his three-year-old, the word no never being able to fall from his lips.

Not when it comes to the hickory eyes of hers, that shine up at him on a daily basis.

When you step into the peaceful house, you assume the two of them are taking a nap somewhere, cuddled together, your little girl safely secure in her Daddy’s arms.

It’s when you overhear soft giggles coming from upstairs that you become curious as to what the two of them are up to.

You climb the stairs with a smile, the chuckles getting heavier, Shawn’s own laughs echoing lightly.

You unobtrusively make your way towards her bedroom, peeking your head into the room to see what is causing the snickers. The moment you observe your husband and little girl sitting on the floor, surrounded by teddy bears and the small tea-set, your heart flutters with joy.

The tea party is her favourite pass time, she would spend hours playing tea-party with you if you’d allow her to.

There have been so many times when Shawn has been on a tour and you have spent hours playing tea-party, just to keep her calm and not set on wanting to call daddy every five minutes.

“Mr.Snuggles, it’s very nice tea.” Shawn lightly glides his hand over one of the numerous teddy bears head.

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“In early December of ‘96, I was raking the blanket of leaves under a maple, getting the property ready for winter.

“Don’t pick the leaves up, please,” JonBenet begged me. “Leave them for me to play in.”

Well, I’m thinking, no way. My job is to pick them up, and that’s what I’m going to do.

“Last year my dad and I did that.” And then she said quietly, “I really miss him. I wish he was around more.”

“Where does he go?”

“I don’t know. But sometimes he goes away for a long time.

Then she started to cry, tears rolling down her face. I didnt know what to say - didn’t know enough about the situation, didn’t want to intrude or play counselor. It wasn’t my place. I changed the subject and started to rake again.

A moment later, I saw JonBenet was scooping up the leaves from the top of the barrel and hurling them over her head into the wind.

“Hey! Stop that! I yelled.

No, I want to play in ‘em!”

She was being kind of bratty. She had a bit of smart aleck in her. I grabbed the barrel and started running toward the compost pile. She chased after me, not about to give up her fun. I set the barrel down, and she dumped all of the leaves out. That made me angry - almost. but before long I made a game out of it. It was fun for both of us. That evening I left a big pile of leaves out front by the gutter for her to play in.

That was probably the last time I spoke to JonBenet. A few weeks later I took the morning paper from my front steps and saw it. I don’t even remember what the headlines said.“

- Brian Scott, the Ramsey’s groundskeeper

cnn.com
Tragedy of a village built on ice
Climate change is threatening to make this Arctic village unlivable. But can it be reborn in a new location?
By John D. Sutter, CNN Video by Bryce Urbany and John D. Sutter, CNN

Shishmaref, Alaska

As the world warms – thanks largely to the 1,200 metric tons of carbon dioxide we humans are pumping into the atmosphere each second – the ice is disappearing. The planet has warmed about 1 degree Celsius since the Industrial Revolution, when people started burning fossil fuels for heat and electricity, creating a blanket of heat-trapping gases in the atmosphere. But scientists say the Arctic, the far-north, is warming twice as fast as the rest of Earth.“I miss that cold, cold weather,” says Hazel Fernandez. I meet her in a community hall; she’d rather be fishing on the ice but says it’s still too thin. “It’s too weird. It’s too warm.”

Outside, thermometers show temperatures in the mid-20s Fahrenheit, or about minus 4 Celsius. That’s freakishly warm for December, everyone tells me. I’m wearing two coats and ski pants, and residents of Shishmaref seem to find that hilarious. This isn’t cold, they say. Their sealskin hats and mittens, the fur-lined hooded parkas – those mostly stay at home.Fernandez, in her early 60s, fondly remembers temperatures of 30- and 40-below Fahrenheit.But mean air surface temperatures increased more than 2 degrees Celsius (3.6 degrees Fahrenheit) in the Arctic region between 1960 and 2011, according to the US National Snow & Ice Data Center. Arctic sea ice, measured since 1979, was at a monthly record low in January. And the September sea ice minimum is decreasing at a rate of 13.3% per decade.

Relocation 

August 2016: Globally, it tied for the hottest month of the hottest year on record. In Shishmaref, residents went to the polls to decide whether they would relocate because of warming.The answer: Yes, by a margin of 89 to 78, according to local officials.But the August 16 vote did not solve Shishmaref’s trouble. Far from it.Annie Weyiouanna, local coordinator for the Native Village of Shishmaref, tells me the tribe has no money to fund the move. And this isn’t the first time the village has held a relocation vote. They did so in 2002, as well. Nothing changed. No one in the village today is packing. And Weyiouanna has tried to stop using the word “relocation” – or uses it minimally, sometimes correcting herself – because she worries it will signal to funding agencies in the state and federal governments that the village will be gone soon and doesn’t need help with grants or infrastructure. The reality is that no one knows how long the village will be stuck. Perhaps forever, some worry, or until the island is gone.“ 

They are not safe right now, and their lives are in danger because of the storms that are coming in,” said Robin Bronen, executive director of the Alaska Institute for Justice and a senior research scientist at the University of Alaska Fairbanks. She was referring to Shishmaref as well as Newtok and Kivalina, Alaska, which face similar circumstances. “(T)hey just need a large sum of money to get them to the places that they’ve chosen so they can be safe."Shishmaref has identified two potential sites for a new version of the community. Both are inland, meaning hunters and fishers would not be able to access the sea as easily. Some people in the community – particularly elders – believe the move threatens the tribe’s Inupiat identity. Away from the coast, are they still the same people? Why should they move when others are driving climate change? 

Esau has wrestled with these questions, too. His grandparents, Shelton and Clara, the couple in the blue house at the edge of the Earth, who lost their son to the ice, do not want to leave. They want to stay in their home – in the community they know so well – no matter the risks.Esau worries about them. "If you ask the older generations like my grandfather, their views are totally different,” he tells me. “They want to stay on this island forever and ever. And I respect that decision. They’re my elders.” But, to me, I think we have to relocate so that our future generations can still be alive.“

Ice Skating • Jeff Atkins

Preference: You and Jeff decide to try something new during the winter holiday.

Note: Yes, I’m aware that it’s August and we’re still months away from December - but if people can be excited and start posting about Halloween, then I can post about Christmas.

214 words x

It was a cold winter evening and you were cuddled up to Jeff’s side, both of you bundled up in a jacket with a knitted blanket wrapped around your shoulders. You both were pretty toasty inside your living room by the fireplace when you decided to take a walk through the park. It had been snowing earlier in the day and within the week, so pallets of white snow covered the streets and sidewalks. Walking through the park, Jeff often kicked some snow in your direction causing you to squeal and pull the blanket off of him hogging it to yourself. Sticking your tongue out at him, you ran towards the rink across the way, leaning against its railings watching the people before you. People were aimlessly skating around the rink, doing figure eighths while others were laughing and clinging to the sides.

“Let’s try something new, yeah?” Jeff whispered in your ear then kissed the side of your hair while hugging you from behind. Biting your lip in thought you shrugged and pulled him over to the entrance. “I don’t know how,” you mumbled lacing your boots while you watched Jeff do the same. “Neither do I,” he grinned with a shrug before grabbing your hand and pulling you to the ice rink.

Rooftop rendezvous

Lee arrived early on the roof and scanned the area for a nice campside. She came with a big duffel bag and started to cover the ground with a heated mattress and some blankets for both of them. It was December and the rooftops of the city weren’t even warm in the summer. It wasn’t that Lee would catch a cold, that may could be Bullseye’s, but when they were drinking they could have it a bit comfortable.

While she waited for Bulls to arrive she prepared her own rifle, a nice thing that, even if she hadn’t used it in a while, was always neat.

@asmilelikegenocide

Scrooge

DAY 1- DECEMBER 1ST

It’s the first of December and Harry’s being a bit of a Scrooge because he’s a little bit poorly.

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SMUT WEEK #1 (TAEGI)

Here’s the first oneshot and the opening for my announced Smut Week :) I hope you’ll enjoy :*

________________________________

On the evening of the 24th of december, BTS decided to watch an older christmas-movie to celebrate their few days off. After Jin cooked a full traditional meal for him and his bandmates, Namjoon and Hoseok started cleaning the table, Yoongi and Jimin prepared the snacks as Jungkook and Taehyung threw all kinds of pillows, blankets and plushies onto the sofas.

“Guys hurry! I’m bored!”, Jin screamed as he sat in his favorite seat.

It didn’t take long until all seven members have finally settled down, the eldest starting the movie. Everybody sat down, Namjoon, Jungkook, Hoseok and Jimin all on one couch, Jin in his single sofa as well as Taehyung and Yoongi on the third one. Wanting to get more comfortable, Tae placed his favorite fuzzy blanket over his and Yoongi’s legs as he leaned his head against his hyungs shoulder. After Yoongi shifted uncomfortably to get in a better position, he placed his right arm over Tae’s waist, pulling him closer. The film played loudly, the light of the TV the only thing that lit up the room around them. Taehyung was actually enjoying the movie almost as much as being cuddled up into his beloved hyung. Maybe he loved him even more than he wanted to admit, because the only thing he could focus on was the smell of Yoongi surrounding himand the steady beating of the elders heart against his back. He tried to concentrate only on the playing movie and somehow managed to, but as soon as Yoongi’s left hand brushed against his crotch, both of their bodies instantly stiffened up.

“Hey… Tae relax…”, Yoongi whispered softly into his ear.

And so he did. Just when he relaxed again, the elder’s hand brushed over his crotch once again, this time resting on top of it. Tae could feel the warmth of his touch seeping trough his two layers of clothes, slowly feeling himself hardening under the elder’s touch.

“Tae-ah. Tell me something. Tell your hyung something. Do you like me?”, Yoongi whispered, his hot breath tickeling Taehyung’s ear and causing goosebumps to run down his back.

His body stiffened up once again.

“Tae… Tae-ah… answer me…”

Instead of answering, the younger lifted his hips a little, pressing his growing erection even more into the elder’s palm.

“You’re such a pet sometimes, Taehyung-ah…”

“Yah Yoongi! Shut up, we want to hear the movie!”, Hoseok screamed mildly annoyed.

“Yoongi… I…”, Tae didn’t continue because he wasn’t sure what to say exactly.

“You know why I was asking? Because I do like you, Tae-ah.”, Yoongi whispered again, voice so innocent as his hand moved it’s way to grab Tae’s stiffened dick skin on skin, no layer of clothes in between.

“I dreamed about you so often while you were sleeping next door. You can’t even imagine how many times I almost came over to do this to you. And then, as if you knew it, you kept behaving so sexual… Did you tease me, Tae-ah?!”

“No hyung, I… I didn’t know that…”

By the time he answered, Yoongi started moving his hand up and down slowly, his gliding getting easier by lubricating his hand with Tae’s precum. The younger knew that now wasn’t the time to speak anymore. He had to stay quiet even though a heavy moan was building up inside of his throat. As if Yoongi was able to sense Tae’s restraining, he started pressing his thumb onto the younger’s slit, practically forcing him to spill a sound. When he realised that Tae was still able to keep quiet, he picked up his pace. But still, Taehyung endured all the stimulation silently. Even though to Yoongi it seemed like Tae was not at all struggling to keep quiet, the younger was fighting against the reflexes of his body hard. He wanted to moan, to scream, release low grunts, he had the urge to kiss Yoongi, make out with him, slide his slender fingers through the elder’s mint hair. But he couldn’t do any of that, not if he doesn’t want the other members notice their actions. He had been teased by Jungkook often enough about liking “Yoongi-hyung” a little bit too much. Anyways, now the same hyung he was apparently showing too much affection to, started pumping even quicker, flicking his wrist in a way that had Tae gasping for air. He was close, so close. Still, from the missing communication of moans and grunts, Yoongi didn’t notice until Tae was spilling. Spilling his hot seed all over Yoongis hand and the insides of his now ruined boxers. After riding out Tae’s high carefully, the elder freed his hand again to clean it with a tissue he got from the desk next to them. Taehyung cuddled back into the form of his hyung, clearly feeling uncomfortable with his sticky essence in his boxers.

“Yah Tae-ah. You better come to my room tonight once everyone is asleep. You need to pay be back big time for that.”, Yoongi whispered in his ear, Tae being able to hear the slight smirk that was forming on his hyung’s pretty lips.

He will make Yoongi pay for not being able to even breath heavier. He will definetly punish him. Or at least make him regret that he wasn’t able to earn one of his moans. Because Taehyung knows damn well that only his voice can fuck people up, Jungkook told him often enough. 

_______________________________

I hope you enjoyed some cutesy Tae feauturing naughty Yoongi scenario ;)

Tomorrow I will finally post the next part of “Spa Weekend” ^^

I hope you all have a very merry christmas! Celebrate with your families and cheerish the time together!

~Nida

December 1st - Steve Rogers

December 2nd - Loki Laufeyson 30 day writing challenge.

A/N : I was asked to do a 30 day challenge awhile ago, but manged to postpone it my favorite month of the year!

P.S… I live in S.A… We don’t get snow for Christmas!

Originally posted by kiamkiamkiam

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Simple Thing

Daryl Dixon Imagine

I’M BACK! I really really hope this one was worth the wait… :D


You’re telling Daryl’s and your daughter how you’ve met her father.

approximated reading time: 11 minutes

word count: 2061



I yawned deeply standing in front of the microwave waiting for the milk to get hot. A microwave… that little gadget still seemed ridiculously out of place in this world. But I wouldn’t miss it for even a day. The kiddo was crying for a hot milk before she went to bed and tried to sleep and I wasn’t willing to sit in front of her bed for hours just because I thought that hot milk after brushing her teeth wasn’t the best thing. Daryl had smiled at our daughter, his little princess, and told me to just go downstairs and get her her milk. ‘Ya know, just today…’
The sound from the microwave brought me back to reality and after burning my fingertips at the hot mug I grabbed the milk with a towel and carried it upstairs.
“Here we go!”, I said. “Be careful, Sweetie, it’s hot”, I said and watched our daughter devour the hot milk before she fell down into her pillows with a satisfied sigh.
"Bed time story?”, she asked with her puppy eyes that made not only her dad but me too jump at her very word.
“Sure, what do ya want to hear?” Daryl tucked her in the way only he could, the way only a little girl’s hero could do it to protect her from the monsters that were trying to come for her at night. They couldn’t get her though, because her dad tucked her in.
“How have you met Mommy?” She looked at Daryl. “And what was Daddy like?” She looked at me before looking back to her father with a child’s expectations in her gleaming eyes.

“Really?!” I sat next to Daryl and leaned against his shoulder.
“Ya’ve heard that story a million times before”, Daryl said with a soft smile.
“Two million times!”, our daughter corrected him. She too was smiling. “But I want to hear it again. I like it so much!”
“Okay then, here we go”, Daryl grinned clearing his throat. “It was a nice day in June when I saved mommy from the monsters outside.”
“You mean when Mommy saved you!”, I protested watching our giggling child as she sat up in her bed to throw a stern glance at Daryl.
“That’s not how it was!”, she said.
“It wasn’t!?”, Daryl pouted.“Ya know the story better than I do. Why won’t you tell it!” He tapped his finger softly against her forehead making her giggle even more.

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Home For The Holidays (A.I.)

A/N: This is the first part to my 5SOS Christmas thing I’m doing. Enjoy! :)

Masterlist || Ask

Michael || Luke || Calum

****

I hated this.

Absolutely despised it.

I completely detested the fact that Ashton and I have constantly been fighting, especially so close to the holidays. The fighting wasn’t even about important things either. It was mainly about the smallest and unproblematic things.

The holidays were meant to be a very joyous and loving time of the year and yet here we were, fighting and having screaming matches up to the point that he and I weren’t even speaking to each other. That was until now.

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I’m LOL-ing, I’m a cacophonous sea of EL OH ELs because I  just realized* that all three beardy boys started “dating” their respective beards at pretty much the same time (how natural and  RaYL!):

Cherliam:  December 12

Zigi: Nov. 25

Douis: Dec. 8

*more like was wrapped in a woolen blanket of indifference until i read an article that made me have an ‘Ernie having a book revelation’ moment

3

Rafa, Hershey, and Roger 💖 

My bundles of joy all together.

         Now here they are, all together. I still remember the time when they were born, it was December 15, 2016. It was 2:00 AM. I just woke up, being ready for school when I saw my mom and sister, sitting beside each other at the edge of the bed, looking down. Of course, I started to became curious, so I went towards them. And the first thing I saw… was three blessed puppies in a box with a blanket as their mom, Sophie, breastfeeds them. My heart suddenly melted, I never thought she would give birth to four astonishing puppies, two boys and two girls. My dad, sister and I immediately named them. Dad would name the boys, and my sister and I would name the girls. And so, there was Roger, Hershey, Rafa, and… Tracey. Tracey was the youngest, and the strongest. We made a deal that we would give one puppy for the owner of their father. Obviously I didn’t want to, but I have to, so we decided to give Tracey away when she can already stand and run on her own four feet because I know that they will take good care of her. At least they live close to us so I could visit her any time and at least we gave her to my godfather. Unfortunately, after a few months, she passed away. They said she was accidentally poisoned, that maybe because of something she ate. I didn’t blame them, I have no rights to, but I just can’t get over to the fact that she wasn’t even able to celebrate her first birthday with her siblings. They didn’t had the chance to see her one last time, and I never even had the chance to say goodbye. I still remember, every time I would come and visit her, she would always jump to me, it’s like she was expecting me to come and play with her and let her lick my face. I love her, and I miss her… very much, but I know that she is in a much better place now where she would never experience pain ever again. I love them. I love them all. 

Cold December Night

Lil’ celebratory Christmas fluff for reaching 250 followers! Thank you so much!

Wrote this while listening to this

Dean x Reader Fluff. Fluffy Fluffy Christmas Fluff.

Word Count: 667


You opened the front door, a thick blanket draped over your shoulders as you carried a huge mug in each hand.

“You ok babe?” You asked, handing Dean one of the mugs as he sat on the bench on the front porch, watching the snowfall. The street was silent as almost every house nearby had children which were undoubtedly long asleep by now in anticipation of Santa.

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I was tagged by @seabassie thank you!!! :)
tag 20 followers you want to get to know better

name: Laura
nicknames: Laura Lou, Lucy, Lou Lou, Rua.
gender: female
star sign: Taurus
height: 167cm (5 FT 6)
hogwarts house: slytherin
favourite animal: dogs
average hours of sleep: 8
dogs or cats: dogs i’ve had them my whole life but i’ve started to like cats over the past year
blankets you sleep with: 1
dream trip: australia or dubai
dream job: haven’t decided
when i made my blog: december 2010
followers: 3,000
why i made a tumblr: cause i’m trash
reasons for my url: cause i love me some beyoncé and it’s a lyric from her song heaven.

I tag @jacobine-xoxo @undesregnet @danyandcarlos @dicapriho @formularicciardo @ilovejevsjeans @ricciardont @nowherebound @napoleonsolos @thotscorpio @jennifercheckmeout @twentysevenhulk

Our Future Hearts// Josh Dun

Requested: Hey, fren! Hope you’re doing well! Maybe you could write a really cute fluffy fic about Josh and y/n talking about the future, their goals and dreams and then she surprises him with news that she’s pregnant. Idk. Just something cute!

Xx

              It was a cold December night, snow was falling outside. Though you were never a huge fan of cold weather, you loved the sight of snow. The only good thing you got out of cold weather outside, was curling up under a warm blanket with your fiancé Josh inside. Which is what you were doing now, sipping hot chocolate at midnight together, just talking about memories from the past, and goals for the future.

              “I don’t think I’ll be able to last waiting to marry you.” Josh started, the two of you still had a lot of planning to do for the marriage. You haven’t even chose a date yet, let alone figured anything else out. “I may just have to drag you to the courthouse and make it official before the big ceremony.” He laughed, kissing you lightly as the arm that was wrapped around your shoulders tightened.

              “I can’t wait either. But we have to perfect it. Not like marrying you won’t already be perfect anyway.” You smiled, resting your head against his shoulder.

              “Life with you will be perfect. I think about this stuff a lot, especially when I’m on tour or can’t sleep. Like the little things, cuddling each other listening to the rain hit the roof. Watching silly movies in a blanket fort, acting like kids together. I want to experience everything with you.” He smiled at the thought of his goals. You bit your lip nervously. Josh would need to know at some point, so better now than never.

              “What about having kids? What do you think about that?” You asked, tracing the pattern of his tattoo as you two sat in silence, him thinking.

              “I’ve never thought about it in detail; like of course I’d love to have kids with you one day. If we had a little girl, I’d be the protective dad. I’d cuddle her and hold her at every opportunity, show her off to everyone. Buy her cute little bows and tutus for when she’s a baby. When she grows up a little I’d find a bunch of cool hairstyles to try for her, and get her to try out the new merch Tyler and I make. I’d get her a little drumset, but only if she would want one. I’d love to have a little mini drummer running around. Show her a bunch of new beats, and who knows maybe have her teach me a few in the future.” He smiled. “I’d be the one to hold her hand before anything she finds scary, and talk about how boys aren’t worth her time if they make her cry. I’d have to resist raising hell for a little boy if he made my daughter cry though. I’d joke about how she can’t date until she’s married, and kiss all her boo boos better. I kind of hope to have a daughter first, so if we choose not to have any more kids after that I at least have my baby girl; who I would hope is a daddys girl. That would be adorable—no offence.” You were smiling so much it almost hurt your cheeks, it was so cute listening to him talk about his goals; seeing his eyes light up and crinkle at the edges as he smiled. Lost in thought about the idea of raising a daughter. “Having a son would be sick too though. I would buy him an awesome little baby snapback so he could match daddy. He would be so embarrassed to see a picture of that when he grew up, but we would make sure that his future girlfriends see it. I would teach him beats too, giving him a little drumset if he wanted one. I would do almost all the same stuff as if I had a daughter; except I’d give him little fauxhawks when he first started growing hair. I’d have to teach him to respect women though, no son of mine will be a fuckboy. I’ll talk to him about how we met; I would tell my daughter that too. Show them that true love is real and I would tell them stories of our relationship. They would probably get so annoyed with us though, listening to their parents talk about their “old person love”.” At this point you were sure you would spill a few tears if Josh kept going, so you spoke up.

              “You would love your child, no matter if it was a boy or girl. Right?” You smiled to yourself as Josh nodded.

              “Of course, gender doesn’t change anything. Why?” He asked, looking concerned and confused.

              “I asked, because I’m pregnant. You will be a daddy. Sooner than we both thought.” You saw his eyes light right up at your words.

              “We’re going to be parents? There’s going to be a mini Josh or mini Y/N running around? God this is amazing. I’m so excited. I’ve always wanted to be a dad, and here I am with the love of my life planning for just that.” You pulled him closer as he did the same. Life couldn’t feel any more perfect than right now.

The December moon lingers, coldly, like
the sadness creeping into your bones

This is an ache that they never warned
you about, an ache that isn’t subdued
by any substance

You wake up every morning and your
first thought is, “it hurts”

And it hurts
And it hurts
And it hurts

I feel it a little everywhere

Here, in my chest.

There, in my bones.

It leaves me weakened, lacking
something that I need and I don’t
know what it is

It flows through my bloodstream and I feel it pulsate through my fingers

then it hits my toes

It settles in my joints and
solidifies like cement

I cannot move

I am wrapped in a blanket that feels
like it is made out of shards of glass
it is not comforting but it provides
a barrier, a shield where I don’t exist
to the things that are just outside of it

It starts to hurt in my throat
and I think maybe the words are finally
going to come out like they’re supposed to

They never do

Instead I curl into the smallest
thing I can be

Wilted, and frail

I sleep on your side of the bed
when you’re gone
trying to salvage any of the warmth
you may have left behind

—  Alexis H., with December comes the cold
Happy birthday!

 Surprise! I’ve got a little treat for all of you on the occasion of my 22th birthday today!

I felt so warm and fluffy while writing this because I actually imagined what it would be like to experience that.

I hope you like it as much as I do.

_________

Happy Birthday!

I woke up this morning to the smell of coffee, toast and eggs. I opened my eyes to find the bed empty and the door open.

“Dan?”, I called for him.

“Stay where you are. I’m almost ready.”, he responded. Ready for what, I thought to myself, when Dan came through the door carrying a tray full with food.

“Happy birthday, love!” Dan placed the tray on the bed and leaned over to me. “I love you!”

“Oh, Dan! This is so cute. Thank you. I love you, too!” I leaned in for a kiss.

“I’m all yours today. No filming, no editing – it’s all about you.”

“Aww.”, I sighed. “How about we have that breakfast first? I am starving!” We both laughed and started eating. When all the plates were empty I put the tray off the bed and rolled onto Dan.

“So.”, I started. “You’re all mine today, right?”

“That’s what I said.”

“Can we maybe go for a walk along the Thames? It’s such nice weather outside.”

“Oh, okay. That’s not what I expected but sure. Everything you want.” He smiled at me and I gave him a quick kiss.

“Great. Let’s go.” I was about to jump out of the bed when Dan grabbed arm.

“What? You mean right now? But I wanna cuddle.”, he said with this innocent look on his face.

“Five minutes.” He pulled me back under the blanket and snuggled close to me. Five minutes turned into an hour and we both needed a shower afterwards but I didn’t complain because it was the best way to start into my birthday.

“Daaaan! Hurry up or I leave without you.”

“I’m here! I’m here. Let’s go.” Dan grabbed my hand and we walked to the next underground station to get to Central London. Once we got back up the cold wind blew me right in the face and I pulled my scarf closer around my neck.

“It’s freezing. Damn.”, I complained.

“It’s december, darling. What did you think?”

“Haha. Very funny.”

“Come on, let’s get some mulled wine to warm you up.” Dan got both of us a cup of mulled wine and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I put my arm around his hips and so we walked along the Thames having a great view on Big Ben. It was getting dark and the city was full of lights. It was beautiful.

“Thank you for this great day. I love you!” I looked up to Dan and smiled. He leaned down to kiss me.

“I love you, too. And it was my pleasure. We should do this more often.”

“Yeah, we really should.”

_________

I’ve got asked by one of you if I’m still open for requests and I’m sorry but no. Not at the moment. As of right now I have 6 requests to write and I hope I can get those done until the end of the year. Hope you understand!

Bye.

PS: On a personal matter: It’s the opening night of the Hobbit here in Germany and I’m going to see it tonight. BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER!

Dear January,

Hi there! It seems like just yesterday it was October, but now you’re here.

Bring longer days. I’m tired of it being dark so early, and the winter solstice has finally passed.
Bring coziness. I love hot chocolate by a fire, sweaters, and warm, soft blankets. I didn’t get much winter weather in December, so you’d better make up for it.
Please bring positivity. I need more of it in my life.
And finally, bring new opportunities for happiness.

You’re kicking off a new year. Please start it off well.

—  letter to January!
Back To Last December

The idea behind this is, everyone’s perception of December and the festive time, are supposed to be happy times, with the person you love by your side surrounded by friends and family. But what if you don’t have that special someone? What if December and the festive times are just full of memories to you? What if the thought of December just pains you because you regret so much stuff that you did in a previous December? What if?

Genre: who cares?

Word Count: 1618 words

Song(s) used: Last December - Nina Nesbitt and Back To December - Taylor Swift

December, the month where all the festivities commence, the month where all loved ones gather together to celebrate the season of giving. December is the cold month where you spend the cold winter, December nights huddled up infront of the fire with the person you are undeniably in love with. But I guess for me, December is the month where memories of a time that was once better and a time where I was happier start replaying in my mind. And instead of having the person I am undeniably in love with huddled with me in front of the fire, all I have is a blanket that’s too small and my own thoughts. So I guess for me this year, December is a sad month instead of a joyous month.

But i guess sadness, fall outs and breakups are basically inevitable and I should just accept the fact that I no longer have the man that I was deeply in love with, by my side anymore. But somethings not letting me let go. He was different to anyone that I’ve ever met. And his name constantly repeats in my head like a chant just repeating ‘Dan, Dan, Dan.’ Dan, Dan was probably the best boyfriend that I ever had. And I’m not saying that I have had a lot of boyfriends, but he was the best one.

When I say that Dan was different, he really was different. He always put me first. He put me first with everything. And I feel like a shitty person looking back on it because Dan was giving me his best, and I gave him my worst. He gave me roses and I left them there to die.

So while I’m walking around the streets of London, trying to focus on getting the presents that my friends and family want, memories of Last December is all I can think of and remember. And if we’re being honest here, I would go back to last December and turn around and make everything alright, I would do it in a heartbeat and I would go back all the time if I could.

‘Arrrghh why am I doing this to myself’ I think to myself. I keep on looking back on everything we shared and it feels like it’s tearing me apart from the inside out. It’s been a while but I don’t think you can fully get over any sort of relationship. You learn to move one but you never really let go. Because when you’re alone, sometimes you’ll see something that reminds you of that person, then you spend the rest of the day and night just thinking about that person, what they may be doing, how they are. 

That was December for me. December always reminded me of Dan, even the thought of December reminded me of him, and then I would just spiral into a black hole of memories and all I could feel was the horrible feeling of regret

I get urges to just knock on his door and apologise for everything that ive done, but sometimes I feel like its a bit too late. I mean, it has been a year but people are always telling me that it’s never too late to do anything. So why am I doubting my urges and thoughts?

I walk around London aimlessly, lost in my thoughts when I hear my name being called out. I turn around and see two tall figures about 20 feet away from me. Dan and Phil. I smile at them as Phil walks up to me, Dan trailing nervously behind him. Oh god.

“Hey, how have you been?” Phil asks, wrapping me in a tight hug. Ive always loved Phil’s hugs, they always make me feel so much better.

“I’ve been great, actually. I finally got the promotion at work. How about you guys? What have you guys been doing lately?” I guess I didnt really lie, but i didnt tell the truth either. I have been great, but I havent. And I got that promotion because I just threw myself into my work, something I had never done before, just to keep me distracted.

“We’ve been pretty good. Just finishing up some last minute Christmas shopping. Congrats on the promotion! You should’ve told me sooner, we could’ve had this bug huge celebration!” Phil answers. I havent heard a peep out of Dan this whole time. He probably just doesnt want to talk to me, or doesnt know what to say.

“Hahaha, oh no, I didnt want to bother you or anything with that, when i got it, i thought it wasnt as important as I originally thought would be.” And then therea nothing else any of us could say. Phil just stood there and nodded when I finished my sentance ans Dan looked like he wanted the whole world to swallow him up. Finally Phil speaks up.

“So (Y/n), we were just about to go and find somewhere to eat, would you like to join us?” And as soon as he said that, Dan shot him a look, meaning something like 'Phil what the actual fuck are you doing?’

“Oh no thank you. I wouldn’t want to feel like I was intruding. Thank you for the offer though.” Phil scrunched his eyebrows together, probably not satisfied with your answer. He wasnt going to take no for an answer.

“No it’s completely fine. Plus, we have so much to catch up on. Please? It would be lovely to have a nice chat with you, that isnt on the pathway.” Phil pleads. I giggle a little at his desperation, but I guess it would be nice to chat to him, and possibly Dan, I guess. So onwards we go, to a small little restaurant. It was really nice.

We ordered our food and Phil and I chatted like we usually would. But the atmosphere around us was still quite tense, I guess it was because Dan was there, and he probably hasnt forgiven me for basically shattering his heart. But, i wouldnt forgive me either, and I havent forgiven myself. Why would I?

“Excuse me guys, sorry I just need to go to the loo, be back in a bit” Phil announced and my heart started beating profusely in my chest. Dan and I were going to be alone, and I had no idea what is going to happen? Will we talk? Will the atmosphere still bd tense and awkward? I guess I’ll have to find that out for myself.

“Okay Phil, have fun i guess?” And then he left. I looked at Dan and gave him a nervous smile, he just looked down. I sighed, not even bothering to try and hold a conversation with him. There was no point. But I guess I’m glad that hes still here, I guess I’m glad that he didnt walk away as soon as the invitation to lunched popped up.

But I understand why he’s being closed off. I’m his ex-girlfriend. I broke his heart. The last time that he saw me, that memory still burns in the back of his mind. Because god knows it still burns in the back of my mind.

“Soooooooo” I finally hear Dan say. I look towards him and he looks nervous “Is there anything specific you would like to talk about?”

“Hows your parents? Hows life for you?” I ask. He’s conservative and closed off with his answers, but I guess its better than nothing. We just small talk, work and the weather until Phil gets back.

“Sorry guys, there was this weird guy in there who kept talking to me as he was peeing. I couldnt get out of thr conversation.” Phil told us, and Dan and I laughed, probably the first time hes laughed today. “Well it seems that we’re finished. So im going to go and pay the bill, you two stay here, and no, im not letting you help pay the bill.” Phil quickly gets up and leaves before I could basically throw my money at him.

I look at Dan again and I cant help but feel like I should apologise, because I actually havent yet. But I’m gonna swallow my pride.

“Hey uh, Dan?” I start, he turns and looks towards me with a facial expression full of question. “I uh, I guess this is me swallowing my pride, and what I really want to say is that I’m sorry for everything that’s happened. I havent been able to apologise yet, so this is me apologising. And so you know, I would go back and change everything.” I said truthfully, apologising. It felt great to finally get it off my chest. And Dan, he genuinely smiled at me, nodding his head.

“You shouldnt be the only one apologising. I can only blame myself for the way that things happened. But I accept your apology. And im happy that you decided to tag along today.” And we sat there smiling knowing that everything between us is okay and everything between us in the future will be okay

Stuff to survive a long hospital stay

Look, this assumes you know to bring pajamas and clothes and books and your laptop and your phone charger cords and nonskid socks/slippers and a bathrobe and your own pillow/blankie. Under this cut is a list of other items that has been really good to me for the last few weeks. Use it however you want; most of you are young and may not need it yourself, but if you bring one or some of these things to a friend in hospital, then you might win an award or something. It could happen. 

If you want to add stuff of your own: god, please do. It looks like (fingers crossed, wood knocked, self crossed, candles burnt, abject begging, etc) I am headed home soon, but there’s another week coming probably in October, so more strategies to try are good. And if you want my best clear liquid diet tips: hit me up. I have become one with the clear liquid diet. 

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