“If I ask you something right now, do you promise not to bite my head off?”
“Sorry about that,” he muttered, scuffing his foot along the linoleum floor and ducking his head.
“I’m going to take that as a yes,” she continued. “I think you should go for it.”
He lowered his eyebrows in confusion, crossing his arms tightly. Ariel brushed her hair behind her ears and smiled encouragingly nodding at Killian. “What are you talking about?”
“This Emma and her kid. I think you should go for it.”
AN: Guys! This is so long! It is so crazy long! If you read this crazy-long chapter, just know I love you. A lot. As always, I’m constantly singing the praises of @laurnorder who reads everything no matter how crazy long it is.
Living it up on Ao3 and Tag’ed up on Tumblr as well.
debating on if i should send my therapist an email(something i have never done before) to reach out about this whole writing my obituary and eulogy thing for school, (my appointment is next thursday, but this assignment is due on tuesday.) as she knows about my suicidal ideation and how confused i am on what is really me and what is my illness, and countless other things, unlike my family. (who i don’t want to freak out if i go to them for help for this assignment) or maybe if any of you guys have advice on how i should go about attempting to write this?
“Why is there a naked Ken Barbie doll tied up in your room?” “Goddammit, ____! I told you not to go in there!”
“No Candice, I am NOT selling you my soul again.”
“why is the fairy holding a gun.”
“Jesus Christ on a boat made of crackers, what are you doing outside of the pod ship again?”
“WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT” “He said I couldn’t… and I thought it was a challenge…”
“How the fuck did you dye the ocean ORANGE?!”
“Why are the roses green?”
“Great, you made death angry.”
“That better be a press on tattoo.”
“If you only listened to the nature, you could learn more than humans ever passed to us.”
“So, we’re dead?” “Well, kind of… yeah.”
“Remind me again why you have a centaur tied up in your truck?”
“Can you stop staring into my soul every time we meet? I feel exposed.”
“You do realize that he wasn’t breathing when he spoke to us, right?”
“I liked you better when you where possessed by that demon friend of yours”
“You’re absolutely in love with him and have been for at least 2 years if you don’t go tell him how you feel I swear to god I will”
“There are worse things in life than death.” “Nobody asked you,Lucifer.” “Just saying.”
“Well, it’s wonderful that you’re having a sexuality crisis, but in case you forgot, we’re kind of in the middle of STOPPING THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!”
“Why is there a horse crashing on our couch?” “Oh, that’s Satan.”
“Why would I hang out with you? You’re so incompetent! Your sacrifice to the faeries was so insufficient!”
“Where the hell did the dragon go?! He was right here!”
“Ok, the recipie calls for two cups of lemon and a cup of sugar, but all I see are cough syrup and battery acid…”
“What do you mean today’s not a Tuesday?!”
“So everyone on Earth had the same dream as me?”
“you know what will solve that? Scotch.”
“I didn’t ask for this!” “… you didn’t?”
“How is it that the least likely outcome is always the outcome I receive?!” “You should go buy a lottery ticket.”
“Guys, i know you’re all busy, but if any of you wants the dinner done, i will need my arm back”
“Of COURSE I care about you. That’s why I sold your soul on the black market.”
“JOHN I AM BEGINNING TO QUESTION THE VALIDITY OF YOUR PLAN” “AS AM I ALEX, AS AM I”
“I will take the concept of my rage, transform it into a physical weapon, and use it to BEAT YOU TO DEATH!”
“Did you really HAD to slap the shark?!” “I mean… If you want me to kick it-”
“I don’t care, your tamagotchi dying is not an excuse to wake me up before noon!”
“You are telling me that the socks with hearts that I’ve been mocking since the first day you arrived are, in fact, what keep you alive?” “Yes!” “What?”
“So you really want me to believe that you’re actually from the future?”
“Dude. What have you done. Now we HAVE TO save those aliens!”
“Can you just stop?” “God no, why would I do that?”
“Hey at least I get laid doing it”
“While that’s a lovely story, it doesn’t quite explain the fires.”
“Dude, please tell me that you planned to deal with her guardian angel when you killed her.”
“That’s such a stupid idea… let’s do it.”
“What do you MEAN this just HAPPENS?!” “All the time, actually.”
“I swear, one day you’ll kill us both.” “Oh please, I’ve never been that reckless.” “…” “That was ONE TIME!”
“Why did you buy a nuke?!” “Why wouldn’t I? It was on sale”
“I am fueled purely by rage and instant coffee.”
“How are you a million years old, bit you can’t even remember who George Washington is?”
“Because I gave not, a single shit.”
“Is that a marijuana? In my good Christian suburbs?!”
“WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT KILLING PEOPLE?? YOU NEVER USE THE DRAGON, YOU IDIOT”
“I don’t care if he’s a unicorn, NO ONE EATS MY MINI EGGS!”
“Jesus Christ Lewis! *Again* with the Snails?” “It’s Thursday! You said Thursday’s were okay!”
“Here’s a story for you. I woke up in Vegas as a makeup guru. I was REALLY drunk.”
“If all your friends jumped off a cliff would you…WAIT, NO IT WAS A JOKE, STOP!”
“You’re kinda like hitchhiking Ghost Busters, aren’t you?”
“For gods sake, ditch the fanny pack”
“Take the tomato!” “No, I don’t want the tomato” “JUST TAKE THE TOMATO”
“‘That’s no moon!’ Everyone remembered Jimmy’s words that night as he scolded his friends for half-heartedly pulling their pants down.”
“WHY IS THERE A BEAR IN MY BATHROOM”
“Can you believe it?” “Just barely.” "Man, I never thought he would ACTUALLY throw the chair.“
"What did you THINK girl scout cookies were made of?”
“Really? That’s not what I heard from Mrs. Sanchez across the hall!” “Mom she’s literally a possessed cow, why do you listen to her?”
“You got the rubber chicken, cheese whiz, and dish soap?” “Yep” “Ok, let’s do this!”
“Are you building a life-sized Godzilla at 3am again?”
“Don’t get pissy at me, YOU’RE the one who didn’t say what kind of tea bags to get for the clown!”
"So YOU’RE the guy the math textbooks warned us about.”
“Where’s our cat?” “I thought you were responsible for it?..”
“What do you mean I’m half demon”
“why are you duct taping a cat to the ceiling?” “aesthetic.”
“Hope is a lie. So is philosophy, morality, language in general, the sky, dogs, and about a third of the population of Michigan.”
“So let me get this straight. You filled a Darth Vader costume… With cats?”
“How did I die this time?” “Well, it was pretty quick. I missed it, but from what I can tell, you convinced an entire school of 4000 people to throw watermelons at you all at the same time.” “…And?” “The impact of the watermelons threw you back a couple hundred kilometers and you landed in the ocean…inside the mouth of a particularly hungry shark.” “Goddamn it I wanted this death to be metal!”
“Yesterday I learned that my childhood friend was a demon.”
“Please tell me you said 'What bothers me most.’ "Yes? What the hell did you think I said?” Well….it kinda sounded like “His father’s meatloaf.’
"Goddammit, why won’t you die?!” "I DON’T FUCKING KNOW! “
"I’d appreciate it if you fucking stopped, thanks.”
“What the hell is this?” “It’s jello, you eat it”
"You didn’t” “I did and I made them watch”
"Why in the hell did you think this was a good idea?” “Look, YOU try saying 'No’ to not just a primordial deity, but my little sister as well.” “…Ok, you got me there.”
“How do you know that it’s supposed to look like this?”
“Are you making *tea*?!” “Well what else am I supposed to do?” “I don’t know maybe STOP THE MONSTER THATS RIGHT IN FRONT OF US!!”
“Why are you in a dress?” “Lucifer wanted to have a tea party. You don’t say no to Lucifer”
“So you’re telling me that aliens invaded while I was on vacation?”
“I appreciate the gesture but I prefer my horses fried rather than alive.”
*whining* “But Mooommm, I don’t want to save the woooorrld!”
“Now I know not to cry there”
“What if we DIDNT kill the king every Thursday” “Good idea we’ll kill him on Fridays instead.”
“So you’re a zombie now?” “I guess I am” “So what are you gonna do about it?” “*shrug* I don’t know….”
“I guess you weren’t joking when you said that the world is ruled by ants”
“When I die, tell everyone 'I told you so.’”
“You’re not real… You’re only in those silly books!” “Correction, my dear, you’re the fictional one.”
“There was no 'free pie’ you moron! You stole it!”
“Okay, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that my pet rock has gained sentience, just like we planned! The bad news is that it turns out he’s evil and is currently building a rock army with the intent of taking over the world. aaaand, he’s trying to get Mt. Everest on his side.”
“Why is our baby on a wanted poster?”
“Zombies are people too, Mom!”
“… I’m gonna go for it. Hold my head for me real quick, and don’t put it on a mannequin like you did last time.”
“Fascinating… I was unaware that was physically plausible.” “I know right.”
“ACHOO!” “Bless you.” “No sorry, that won’t work on me.”
“Bye, Felicia. Take you and your cat ears! GO!”
Prepare yourselves, because starting from tomorrow we will be making ‘100 Prompts That Will Make You Cry’ lists. Hope you enjoy this one. Which prompt do you like the most?
Bail Organa is a normal-as-heck senator that looked at the flaming ruins of the space wizard hangout and went “I should go check this out to make sure everything’s ok.”
He’s a guy who saw one of the young students there get gunned down and went “I should go find what survivors I can.”
He’s the guy who dropped off Yoda to go try to assassinate the Emperor and picked him up when it failed and everyone was looking for Yoda.
He’s the guy who gave sanctuary to the only two Jedi he could find and the two Jedi that would be the highest of the Emperor and Vader’s list.
He’s the guy who watched one of his closest friends die after giving birth the children of the second most dangerous/evil guy in the galaxy, and began making arrangements for the children’s safety.
He’s the guy that took the daughter of the mass-murdering sorcerer who ruined the galaxy and decided to put himself and everything he held dear at risk to raise her as his daughter, give her a loving home.
He’s the guy that taught his daughter, who has the genes of the most powerful Jedi that’s ever lived, to channel her passions into righteous causes and the aid of others.
He’s the guy that started the Rebellion before there was even an Empire and who constantly put himself, his family, and his people at risk so that people across the galaxy could continue to fight against tyranny.
hey guys! so I just hit 1k (???) so I decided to finally do that long awaited follow forever that I have been promising well.. FOREVER. I made this blog during the Euros because I needed more people to complain with/share memes with and boy I haven’t been disappointed…
Anyways here is just a little shoutout to all my mutuals because thank you for not unfollowing me when I go into that white-hot-rage-live-blogging-mode™️ & I promise you all there is nothing but bad memes and unfunny puns to come :)
This. This is entirely the fault of @blackkatmagic and @nellynee, and this ask-post over on blackkat’s blog. Because I just cannot resist the challenge of ‘why break up one ship for another when you can have both as a healthy triad?’ So I wrote it, even though I never actually got far enough to meet two-thirds of this ship in canon, and most of the characterisation is based on blackkat’s fics (although probably not half so good as hers).
Because really, who could resist this; “Spunky young power couple seduces village creepy shut in. Everyone is confused.”
OT3 for this prompt: Minato/Orochimaru/Kushina from Naruto.
I have to sit and listen to you gabbing on about weird obscure jutsu,
then I’m going to do it over ramen, you know!” Teuchi smiled at
the sound of his best customer approaching the restaurant, presumably
with her boyfriend in tow. Sure enough, when Kushina pushed the
curtain aside, she was preceded into the restaurant by a sheepish
looking Minato. Kushina followed, pulling another man in after them
by the wrist.
The redheaded jounin manhandled
Konoha’s own snake
into the seat next to Minato, then plonked herself down in the seat
on Orochimaru’s other side. “You didn’t have to sit and
listen.” The man snapped
at Kushina, clearly very annoyed with her. “We are quite capable of
holding a conversation without you.”
Kushina scoffed at him, flapping a
hand. “Please. Minato wouldn’t know what to do with you if I left
the two of you alone for more than five minutes, you know.”
Orochimaru failed to come up with a retort, looking baffled and
irritated in equal measure.
on the other hand, turned very red and started spluttering. “That’s
not- You can’t just- What are you- Kushina!”
The last word came out as a whine, and Minato dropped his head
against the counter.
be such a ditz, pretty boy.” Kushina chided, and then turned to
Teuchi before Minato could respond. “The usual, please, Teuchi-san!
Plus whatever this awkward
turtle wants.” She
nudged Orochimaru with her elbow to indicate who she meant. It was a
good thing she had, because ‘awkward turtle’ was not a descriptor
Teuchi would ever have
applied to him on his own. He
started cooking up Kushina and Minato’s usual, even as he raised an
eyebrow at Orochimaru.
Orochimaru ignored him in favour of
glaring at Kushina. “He’ll have the shoyu tamago
ramen with extra eggs.”
Minato put in, recovering from embarrassment as fast as he ever did.
It was a good thing he could do that, Teuchi thought, since he was
dating someone like Kushina, who got a kick out of embarrassing
Orochimaru switched his glare to
Minato. “I don’t recall asking you to order for me.”
“Did I get it wrong?” Minato
asked, caught somewhere between innocent and smug.
Obviously he hadn’t, because Orochimaru looked twice as likely to
murder him, but conspicuously didn’t say a word. Minato
beamed like the sunrise.
“So, you were explaining the connection between space-time seals
and blood jutsu?”
He prompted brightly. Orochimaru sighed heavily, but answered with a
long explanation that went entirely over Teuchi’s head. It
clearly didn’t go over Minato’s head, because he was staring in
rapt attention as Orochimaru talked, in a way that made Teuchi feel
oddly like he was intruding on something private.
He served up their ramen, and was
not surprised when Minato and Orochimaru mostly ignored theirs in
favour of their discussion. He was
surprised when it took Kushina several seconds to lift her cheek off
her fist and stop staring at them long enough to start scarfing down
her usual three bowls of ramen. She caught his look the first time
she came up for air, and shrugged unrepentantly. “What?
They’re total dorks, you
know, but they’re my dorks
Orochimaru choked on his first bite
of ramen. “Excuse me?” He demanded.
“Well, you are, aren’t you?”
Kushina asked, smirking. “We’re a package deal, slinky; buy one
get one free. If you want to get some this evening, instead
of just staring at Minato like he’s a prime steak and you’re
starving, you’re going to
have to learn to dance with both of us, you know.” She paused, her
smirk slowly unfurling into a predatory grin with far too many teeth.
“Last chance to run screaming.”
stunned look on Orochimaru’s face turned, once again, to murderous
annoyance. “I think I should be saying that to you.” He hissed,
leaning forward into her personal space to loom over her. Teuchi was
a bit worried, although on whose behalf he wasn’t quite sure.
Kushina laughed, and shocked just
about everybody when she closed the distance between them and kissed
whimpered quietly, staring at them with his mouth hanging open, while
Teuchi was just trying to figure out when the world had gone insane.
Kushina drew back looking infinitely smug. “Bring it on.”
Time for a rant:
First off let me say I’m a clexa shipper, so I went through the same thing you guys did when Lexa died. But what I’m about to rant about is more serious than any fictional ship.
Okay, for all of you people who’re not watching The 100 anymore because you’re upset, that’s fine! It’s completely okay to stop watching a show you no longer like. But to you shits who’re actively trying to get The 100 cancelled and boycotting it, stop. Seriously, you guys may think that you’re doing the right thing and trying to stop queer bating but you’re destroying tons of innocent people’s livelihood. You’re trying to cancel a show that’s queer bated, which it bad, but that was a decision that was made by a few. You’re taking away the jobs of tons of people for instance, Eliza Taylor, Lindsey Morgan, Bob Morley, Marie Avgeropoulos, Devon Bostick, Henry Ian Custick, Richard Harmon, Paige Turco, Chris Larkin, Isaiah Washington, Zach McGowan, cinematographer, floor manager, graphics coordinator, stage manager, makeup artists, production manager, technical directors, stunt coordinators, video control operator, composer, colorist, editors, foley artist, costume designer, location manager, production and set designer, etc. Should I go on? And I know what you guys are saying, that they’ll be better off working on something that’s not the show, but not if the show gets cancelled! They’re way less likely to get hired (maybe even ever again) if the show gets cancelled, it looks bad for them. Name one successful actor from a failed tv show. Hmmm, don’t really know anyone do you? And then think about some minor workers on the set who might not even get a job ever again if The 100 gets cancelled. All because you guys had to have a fit and demand the show gets cancelled, stop being a baby and realize that people have jobs and aren’t as privileged to have everything handed to them, they work, and you’re taking away the work from them. It’s as simple as that. Yes, I get you’re upset about Lexa but please look at the bigger picture. So next time I hear someone trying to boycott The 100, you better be ready for me setting a fire in your ass.
Steven + Peridot = MELON QUARTZ I couldn’t decide on a colour scheme or a gem though so I went with both ideas #1 is Watermelon (Tourmaline) Quartz #2 can be Melon Quartz (commonly called Tangerine Quartz) That way I can call them Mel no matter what >>