i seriously need to go to bed now


you can be in seattle where is 9am aND IN MIAMI ITS FUCKING 12PM?? it would literally take you 48 HOURS, (THATS TWO FULL DAYS) to travel the 2,735 miles between those two states. an d youRe in the sSAME fUCking coUNtrY what tEh fCUk



but they’re not even coUntrY tIme zoNEs??? m8 u can be in omaha ne and in columbus ne its fucking 1 hour ahead of you THEY’RE BOTH IN THE SAME STATE???WH AT?/? 


‘we were unable to calculate the route and time by road’ you know fucking why? bECAUsE tHERE ISNTT A FUCKING ROAD. HAWAII IS LITERALLY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN WHAT TH E FU CK AMERICA WHAT THE FUKC

in all seriousness tho lads im not here for smug mockery of people who have trumpgrets like gods know it is tempting to go I TOLD YOU SO, MADE THAT BED NOW YOU GOTTA LIE IN IT but forreals we need every helping hand we can get in fighting back against this shit so I’m gonna be over here like - if you voted for the evil tangerine cus you really believed he was gonna be the cure for government corruption and how hard it is to get a job; and you’ve now realised that his priorities were a)not that and b)literally the worst, here’s how we’re fighting it. Join in. (and look to the probably unconscious racism that had you ignoring the appalling shit he dribbled on the campaign trail cus you can do better)

Ok friends, it’s getting pretty late here and I (Mod H) have to go to bed for the night. Thank you to anyone who has sent in messages of support - seriously, I wish you guys could see some of the stuff in our inbox right now that we haven’t published, there’s so many of you coming out and saying kind words.

I can only reiterate what I keep saying. Be good to each other, support each other, look out for those who need help. If you can, help people. Keep yourself safe, make sure that you are okay. Whatever happens, know that you have the support of this community, and so many more. We have faced adversity before, and we shall overcome it the same way we have overcome it so many times - together.

Take your days one at a time. Keep putting one foot in front of the other, keep supporting each other, keep carrying on. We will always be here for you and supporting you, and you are never alone. Not ever. You are brave, all of you, and you are strong even when you feel like you are not, and together we will get through this.

Take care, friends.

Just A Little Help | Part 2 |

Hi! I finally finished it! God, it took me so long to do so. I usually write before I got to bed, but I figured that I should finish it now because I already had the ending planned out. Should I make a part 3 where the tell Gemma and Michal? I need suggestions, so please feel free to drop me an ask! Also, sorry for any mistakes!



The overall seriousness in his voice and Gemma’s despairing facial expression made you extremely concerned about their issue. The small smile on your face faded.

“Yeah, ok… let me go wake Harry. You two can head to the lounge if you want.” You imparted before slipping out.

As you walked up the stairs, you had begun to get more curious about what they wanted to talk about. What could be so important that they had to come over at such short notice?

“H? Love?” You whispered as you reach the inside of your bedroom. “Harry, wake up.” You said slightly louder, walking over to him.

He moaned quietly in response.

“Harry? Gemma and Michal are here.” You cooed and ran your hand threw his soft hair.

“Tell ‘em I’m busy…” Harry groaned sleepily. His eyes were still closed as he tried to snuggle closer into the the blanket.

“I think it’s important.” You said in a hushed voice and stretched your hand out for him to take.

Harry sighed. He took your hand and allowed you to help him up. He quickly slipped into his slippers before following you out of the room, down the stairs, and into the living room.

As soon as you entered the room, you heard sniffling and almost inaudible reassured ‘it’s okay’s.

“Hey, hey. What’s the matter, Gem?” Harry gushed, walking quickly towards his sister. You rushed behind him and rubbed her back as Harry hugged her tightly.

Gemma stayed quiet for a moment as she wiped away a few tears. “Why don’t you two have a seat first?”

You and Harry looked at each other confused. You shrugged at him and afterwards you both sat down.

“There’s really no way to ask this, Y/n. I’ve known you for nearly ten years and you’re one of the very few people I could confide in for this favor.” Gemma paused for a moment before continuing, “A few days ago, we found out that we’re incompatible to conceive together. I have major tube blockage, and our doctor says that we have a few options: we could adopt or we could find someone to carry my egg and his sperm. We just want to know if you’d consider being our surrogate.”

You were dumbfounded to say the least. You had absolutely not been expecting this. At all.

Your blankly confused face had begun to scare Gemma and Michal.

“I… I don’t know.” You managed to get out.

“You don’t have to do it. We understand if you don’t. We just wanted to ask before we look into adoption.”

“I think we should talk about this together thoroughly first. Then, we can give you an answer.” Harry piped in.

You nodded, finally having processed it.

Gemma and Michal had left not long after.

Harry plopped down on your shared king-sized bed after patiently finishing his nightly routine and he successfully tucked all three kids in.

You, on the other hand, had been procrastinating from the moment Gemma and Michal had left, to now. You thought about it immensely, weighing all the pros and cons you could think of. This was a very tough decision to make, but it would determine a couple’s entire future.

Two very important people in your life.

“Are you ready to talk about it?” Harry drawled, pulling the duvet over his legs. He sat up with his back against the headboard and his right hand reaching for yours.

“I think so,” you cleared your voice, “I thought about it a lot. I mean, I think I’m getting a little old, don’t you? But she’s much older than me, she’s already reached past the safety limit. Even if she could have children she would not only be putting her baby’s life in danger, but her own.” You looked at him unsure.

Harry nodded. He didn’t quite know what to say, but he wanted to make sure you knew he understood.

“Do you think I should do it?” You raised an eyebrow.

“As her brother, I think it would be amazing if you could give her and her husband the most beautiful gift of life. But as your husband, I don’t necessarily think this is the best idea because we have a daughter and two toddlers to look after, and this would only bring you more stress.” He spoke profoundly. He gave your hand tight squeeze. “This is completely up to you, though. You know I’ll always support your decision.”

“Thank you,” you smiled up at him. “Maybe I should sleep on it for now.”

Harry hummed, agreeing. “I love you.” He said, kissing your lips before fully lying in bed.

“I love you, too.” You replied. Finally turning the lamp on your bedside table off, and crawling in next to Harry.

It was very early in the morning when you woke up. The sun had not yet set, so you decided that you would go downstairs to the front porch and watch it rise with a warm cup of tea.

You sat up carefully in bed, cautious not to wake Harry. Once you got out, you slipped into one of Harry’s jumpers that he left on the floor next to his unclaimed side of the bed. You shook you head and scolded his sleeping frame. You figured you’d yell at him later.

You made slow and quiet steps down the hall to check on Amelia first, then the twins who were all still asleep and well in each of their beds. Afterwards, you set off to the kitchen to make a small cup of tea and bring it outside with you.

It was slightly chilly outside, but the warmth of Harry’s jumper was enough to keep you content for the next few moments. You snuggled closer to it as you sat comfortably on the porch swing and drank your tea. Birds chirping and the wind blowing was nearly all you heard.

You had been out there for a while, sipping on tea and watching the sun finally rise completely. You hadn’t even noticed the sound of the front door opening until it was slowly closing and the cushion you were sitting on had dipped.

You swung your head around to catch Harry settling down beside you. He had a pair of custom made pajama bottoms with “Styles” perfectly knit on the left side, and an old band tee that he had gotten the hang of using to sleep. You noticed he had a baby monitor in one of his hands.

“Thought you’d be out here.” He said while wrapping his arm around your shoulder. “'Woke up just now and you weren’t in bed.”

You hummed in response and snuggled into his warm side.

“It’s a bit cold out here, don’t you think?” He asked, smiling down at you. Harry grazed his hand along your naked arm. It was cold, and goosebumps could be felt. Even though it wasn’t a long while, you had been quiet ever since he had stepped outside. He frowned before asking, “what are you thinking?” You seemed to be really deep in thought.

“I… I think I want to do it.” You replied.

“What do you mean?” He began rubbing your arm after placing the baby monitor he had held, in between his legs.

“I think I want to be to be Gem’s surrogate.” You answered a little more confident.

Almost immediately, he stopped his movements. “What? Are you sure?” He stuttered. He seemed to be somewhere between happy and a bit concerned.

“Of course, I am. It’s going to be so wonderful to help them with their dream of being parents. Even if it’s just a little help.” You grinned, holding onto his hand.

“A little help?” He grinned back, “baby, you’re *giving* them their dream of being parents. It’s so amazing of you to do this.” Harry embraced you in his arms and held you tightly. “I think I love you even more, if it’s possible.”

  • Me: *peacefully cleaning my room*
  • Mom: *yelling up to my room* Bring down your dirty laundry!
  • Me: *sobbing on the bed* A ella le gusta la gasolina, dame mas gasolina--
  • or...
  • Me: *chilling in the backseat of the car*
  • Dad: Yeah, we're gonna need some gasoline soon--
  • Me: *crying* Como le encanta la g-gasolina--
35 Prompts :)

So here is my new prompt list!! Leave requests! I now accept under the Riverdale fandom!! The others I also accept is Hamilton, Supernatural, Sherlock, and My Candy Love!

1.“That’s starting to get annoying”
2.“Hey, hey, calm down. They can’t hurt you anymore.”
3.“You can’t just sit there all day.”
4.“I’m not here to make friends.”
5.“I need a place to stay.”
6.“Well, that’s tragic.”
7.“You’re seriously like a man-child.”
8.“You can’t banish me! This is my bed too!”
9.“I lost our baby.”
10.“Sorry isn’t going to help when I kick your ass!!!”
11.“Stop being so cute.”
12.“I feel like I can’t breathe.”
13.“You need to see a doctor.”
14.“You’re getting a vasectomy. That’s final.”
15.“This is girl talk, so leave.”
16.“I could punch you right now.”
17.“Are you going to talk to me?”
18.“Welcome back. Now fucking help me.”
19.“Here, take my blanket.”
20.“I don’t want you to stop.”
21.“How could I ever forget about you?”
22.“You’re bleeding all over my carpet.”
23.“We need to talk.”
24.“I want a pet.”
25.“Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now.”
26.“I’m not wearing a dress.”
27.“I’m not wearing a tie.”
28.“I hope I’m never stuck with you on a deserted island.”
29.“Does he know about the baby?”
30.“Hold still.”
31.“I’m not going to be sympathetic until you go to a doctor.”
32.“Fine, don’t say anything and make me worry.”
33.“Tell me you need me.”
34.“Oh honey, I’d never be jealous of you.”
35.“I had a bad dream again.”

Cut & Run Meme ▬ Favourite Moments [02/05].

“Hey, give me my gun, would you?” Zane asked as he shifted, only to wince as the skin pulled.

“Why, you planning on shooting me in the ass when I turn around?”

Ty asked sarcastically as he reached for the holster.

“Tempting, but you’d probably get off on it,” Zane said, holding out his hand.

“Maybe so,” Ty drawled again, grinning widely as he placed the gun in Zane’s hand.

Zane’s palm covered the gun, and his fingers curled firmly around Ty’s hand. His eyes had gone serious when he looked up at the other agent.

“Why did you help me?”

Ty looked down at their hands and then up at Zane with open confusion. “Why wouldn’t I?” he asked.

That certainly wasn’t the answer Zane expected. He figured he’d get yet another smartass remark. His face softened slightly, and he nodded slowly, letting go of Ty’s hand. “Thanks.”

“Don’t thank me,” Ty responded with a smirk. “Just don’t get your prissy ass hurt again.”

“Better watch it, Grady, I might get to thinking you’re taking a liking to my prissy ass,” Zane said, sliding the gun under the pillow.

“I’m sure I’d like parts of it,” Ty shot back as he headed for the door.

“Be right back.”

Imagine the look on Dean’s face when you tell him the bed broke after you two had sex on it.

“Oops” he chuckled and you looked at him with a stunned face.

“Oops? Oops?! That’s all you gotta say? Dean seriously?! I now need to go purchase a new one now!” you exclaimed and he chuckled more, shrugging.

“Hey I could come with you, you know” he moved to wrap his arms around your naked form under the blankets “That way we can test those beds out and you will know which one can withstand your tiger” he said with a small growl and you rolled your eyes, hitting his chest.

“Well my tiger better keep it in his pants because for as long as this bed is out of use because I refuse to get a back problem”

He groaned loudly “Really? Because I kinda- slightly- maybe a lot want- desperately need a second round… now?”

You groaned even more loudly.

“Come over here and make me”- Liam Dunbar

Can you do number 1 with Liam

Prompt List: http://alpha-imagines.tumblr.com/post/127959717296/one-line-prompts

“Y/N” Liam asked “Do you have to keep singing whilst I’m trying to study?”

You giggled and carried on just to wind him up even more

“Seriously” He raised an eyebrow at you

“Can we do something else now” You stated rather than asked

“Well I need to study” Liam responded without looking up from his textbook

“Well I need to study” You mocked, Liam looked at you and laughed

“You’re not making this very easy” Liam said going back to his book

“I didn’t think you liked easy” You smirked

“Stop talking for like 2 minutes please” He whined

“Come over here and make me” You smirked “Dunbar”

Liam shot up from his bed where he was studying and over to where you were stood, you jumped up and wrapped your legs around his stomach.

“This will be way more fun than studying” You giggled

GOT7 - One-shot - Monsters

Summary: How do you define sin? Is it in the profession of a whore or is it in the form of the 3 horny devils called Jackson, Mark and JB that call on you one night?

AN: No-one asked for this ….but everyone needed it. (I will now go and ask forgiveness from baby jesu- wish me luck!) x

‘Until Next Time, Angel’


You chuckle as you look up to the mirror and the reflection of the man lay on the hotel bed behind you, narrowing your eyes slightly at his smirk, before looking back down at your bag, pulling out the lingerie you’d packed for this visit before turning to look at him properly.

'Okay, but seriously?’

'No, you’re right…its actually Lucifer.’ he answers, his smirk somehow growing bigger and more devilish as he continues to watch you, one leg cocked up as he lays back, his eyes continuing to rake up and down you, despite the fact you were still wearing a dress and not the lingerie.

'So you’re telling me your name is Lucifer?’ you say, quirking an eyebrow up at him in disbelief, and scoffing when he nods slowly, laughter in his eyes, making you roll your own as you make your way towards the ensuite.

'Fine. If you really want to be that way, you can remain Mr.Anonymous, but its not something I would be likely to remember anyway.’ you call over your shoulder, only shutting the door to as you strip out of your dress and begin to strap yourself into the skimpy underwear.

'Dont you believe me?’ he calls, a slight hint of frustration mixed in with his amusement, and you chuckle to yourself as you finish strapping yourself into the corset, evaluating yourself in the mirror as you answer him.

'It doesn’t exactly shout 'trustworthy’ when a guy tells you his name is 'Satan’.’

'But you’d believe me if I told you my name was say…Jackson?’

You roll your eyes as you slowly make your way out of the bathroom, writing your signature smirk onto your face that was advertised on all the company’s websites before turning the corner to show him your outfit.

'Mmmmh, how sinful.’

'Really the hell puns?’ you ask, shimmying over to him and standing beside the bed, excitement flaring in your gut as you look down at him, taking in the lines of his bare torso and the large bulge in his black jeans- which appeared to be the only thing he was wearing- just as he was biting his lip, his eyes raking over you somehow even more lustily than before.

'What do you do?’ he says plainly, hands clasped politely in his lap and the sight contrasts so strongly with the sense of need rolling off of him that you cant help but giggle a little.

'I do everything.’ you answer.

'Mmmh, no, no, angel…I really dont think you do do everything…’ he murmurs, smirking as his eyes finally meet yours and he gestures with a sharp nod of his head for you to come closer, his grin almost unmanageable as you straddle his lap, although you become confused when he stops you from touching him, his hands on your wrists burning into your skin.

'Then tell me some things you want to do and i’ll tell you if I do them or not.’ you whisper to him, leaning in to try and kiss his neck and narrowing your eyes once again when he prevents you from doing so.

'Tut tut, little angel…tonight you play by my rules.’ he says, his eyes gradually drifting over your scantily clad body as he speaks, before landing on your own, a wicked grin pulling at his lips and practically dragging the unholy thoughts from you.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

my cat is upset at my mum because the stary cat we took in, slept on my mum's bed and my cat doesn't like to share her nanny or the bed, now she's ignoring my mum.

Cats can be and are usually territorial if not brought up around other cats. You either have to ease the other cat into their life, or give your cat some things that belong to them personally away from the new cat.

Adjustment takes a bit.

Also, if your cat starts refusing to lay where the other cat lays, I seriously suggest getting another litterbox specifically for your cat. Youre probably going to need two now anyways with another cat.


Stressed Out

I wrote this one just now for my writing senpai @aveeragemusings because I figured she needs a lil fluffy Remus with all the stress going on in her life.

It’s a shortie but a cutie, enjoy!

“I hate Arithmancy. I hate Arithmancy.” I chanted under my breath as I studied my meagre supply of notes. “Why can’t they leave math in the muggle world.”

N.E.W.T.S were beginning in just a few short weeks and I was seriously struggling with all the extra work and that was how I had spent my Saturday sitting in bed in my pyjamas, staring blankly at textbook after text book.

“Y/N? Are you in here?” Someone called from behind the locked door.

“Yeah, just a second!” I scrambled off my bed and quickly struggled into a random pair of sweatpants before unlocking the bedroom door.

My boyfriend of nearly two years, Remus Lupin, stood on the other side. His soft brown hair was messy and windblown, his eyes regarding me with curious amusement and his lips spreading into a sweet smile.

“Hey beautiful.” He pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. “It’s nearly 4 what are you still doing in bed?”

“It’s the afternoon?” I questioned, it had been 10am only an hour ago… But, sure enough, the sun was hanging low in the sky outside. “I completely lost track of time,” I smiled sheepishly before moving back to the bed. “I’ve been studying all morning.”

Remus came over and sat down beside me, picking up a random page of notes. “Arithmancy? You hate math.”

“Do you see the problem?”

“I do,” He responded seriously, “I also know exactly what you need.”

He pushed all of the paper and books off the bed and pulled me into his arms.

“Remus!” I scolded, trying my best to look angry in the face of his innocent smile and adorable brown eyes.

“Trust me Y/N, you looked angry when I first got here.”

“I’m not angry love, homework is just being a little shit.”

“And I’m going to help you.” He whispered, kissing my cheek gently and shifting into a more comfortable position. He leaned back against the headboard with me between his legs, resting against his chest while he toyed with my hair aimlessly. “Tell me about your week.”

“You were there for most of it.” I pointed out, nestling into his warm embrace, there was nothing like the feeling of being in Remus’ arms. He was always perfect snuggle temperature and his scent of new books and cinnamon was calming.

“Tell me about the parts I wasn’t there for.” He mumbled, pressing a soft kiss to my temple and entwining his fingers with mine.

And so I did. I told him about all the boring, frustrating and happy moments of my week and he listened attentively, wearing a small smile the whole time as he watched me talk and asking questions, laughing at some parts and attacking my face with kisses at the parts that made me feel annoyed or anything other than happy and by the time I was done all of my stress was forgotten as we both lay there, enjoying each other’s company.


A random moment after Trespasser.  It’s 5am in the morning.  The content  makes little sense, probably.  Because I delete multiple scenes, to get the strip done.

Need to go to bed now, seriously.

So how do you say Iron Bull/Lavellan?  Bulavellan?

I’m playing DAI for the third time.  This time with this new Inquisitor Kati.

I think my most satisfied Warden was also named Kati.

komahina thought of the day
  • ko: "hhhhh"
  • ko: slumps over on hajime's shoulder
  • hajime: "what are you doing get off"
  • ko: "no"
  • hajime: "when have you ever said no to me"
  • ko: "right now"
  • hajime: sigh
  • hajime: "can i at least lay my head on yours"
  • ko: "yes"
  • hajime and ko:
  • hajime and ko:
  • hajime and ko: falls asleep
  • me:
  • me: i feel like just crawling in bed and laying down just imagining them together has my life become completely circled around these two i mean jesus i think im seriously complete and utter trash now i really just need to shut up and like watch the news and go outside i look like a fucking albino holy shit wait that means i look like komaeda fUCK YEAH

You know what I want?

I want Peter to be the Alpha of his remaining family.

I want Stiles to be his mate and emessary.

I want Derek to be asexual and aromantic–just needing pack and the physical contact of puppy piles, and trusting Stiles to fulfill those needs.

I want them to all to sleep in one bed, just cuddling.

I want Stiles and Peter to lazily nuzzle each other affectionately (maybe kiss or nip at each other playfully) while Derek just buries his face in the small of Stiles’ back, or lies across their legs in his wolf form.

I want Cora coming home when she senses the stable pack bonds.

I want them to be a family.

I want the Sheriff to recognize how much they all need each other, how they can never be happy in a “normal” relationship with “normal” people.

I want them to have family/pack dinners.

I want them to be happy.

This is it. This is my most important headcanon these days. 

Drunken Love

Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: none, really

A/N: Hey, guys! I’m so sorry that I’ve been away forever, but I’ve barely been scraping by with school this year, so I haven’t had a lot of time. I’m currently working on some other requests and I’ll try to get back into my writing ASAP!


You woke up to the sound of your home phone blaring. You rolled off of your bed and padded over to the table where it sat and answered the phone sleepily.


“(Y/N)? It’s Tony. I need your help with something.”

“Tony it’s three in the morning I’m not going to the tower in my pajamas to help you stick magnets of Bucky’s arm again.”

“No, no, it’s not that. Maybe later, but that’s not what I’m talking about I have a real problem.”

You were concerned now; it wasn’t like Tony to take anything so seriously, especially at three in the morning.

“Okay, what is it? I don’t know how much help I’ll be, but-“

“Thanks, (Y/N). Will you open your door?”

“You’re at my apartment?”

“Yeah, just open the door I can’t carry him for this long.”

“Carry WHO?”

“Just open the door!”

You unbolted your front door and opened it wide. It took a moment to process what you saw: Tony in half his Iron Man suit, carrying a disheveled and confused Steve, who looked like he had no idea where he was.

“Um, Tony… what did you-“

“No time, (Y/N)- I’m gonna drop him right here if you don’t move out of the way.”

You stepped to the side and watched as Tony led the super soldier to your couch. Tony took a deep breath and turned towards you.

“Okay, I know this is weird, but I need you to watch Steve for the rest of the night.” You raised an eyebrow and Steve just listened obliviously. Tony continued, “I may or may not have slipped some of Thor’s Asgardian stuff into Cap’s drink. And by ‘some’ I mean a lot. Basically, he’s hammered and as much as I’d love to show off a drunk Captain America to the people of New York, I actually have some real speeches to give tonight- in about 10 minutes, actually.”

You began to protest, saying that you had no idea what to do with Steve, but Tony just rushed out of your door and headed towards the Avenger’s Tower. You turned towards Steve and took a better look at him. His hair was sticking up in odd places and his shirt was unbuttoned a bit father than usual.



“Do you need anything before bed?”

He thought for a moment and then his eyes widened with glee. “(Y/N)! Can we make popcorn? I haven’t had anything to eat all night and I really need some popcorn!”

You desperately wanted to tell him no, but his puppy eyes were too much for you to bear. “Fine. You can have popcorn. Just stay here, okay?”

He nodded and you made your way to the kitchen. Just as the first kernels were popping, you heard a crash coming from the living room. You rushed out to where Steve was supposed to be sitting and found him sprawled out on the floor next to your coffee table.

“Steve! I thought I told you to stay there!”

He sat up and looked at you with wide eyes, “I just wanted to help you make the popcorn. But I miscalculated where that table was.”

You chuckled, and pulled him towards your bedroom. As drunk as he was, Steve managed to carry most of his weight (luckily for you) as you led him to your unmade bed. He plopped onto your mattress and stayed still while you pulled the quilt over him. He smiled sleepily at you and closed his eyes.

Before you could make it out the door, Steve mumbled, “Thanks, (Y/N). I don’t want the popcorn anymore; I think it burned. Goodnight. I love you.”

 You waited until he was snoring softly before you responded.

“I love you, too, Steve.”


Five hours later, you woke up again. This time, some clamoring around in the kitchen was what disturbed your rest. Pushing yourself off of the couch, you walked around the corner to where Steve was trying to make two cups of tea.

“Morning, Cap.”

He smiled sheepishly at you before handing you a mug.

“Thanks, (Y/N). I know I was a mess last night and that I must have been a horrible 3:00 A.M. wakeup.”

“It’s fine Steve. You were no trouble at all.”

“Really?” Steve asked, holding up the bag of burned popcorn that you’d forgotten in the microwave. “Anyways, thanks again. I don’t know what I’d do without you. See you later?”

“Sure, see you at work.”

Steve set his finished tea down in the sink and strode over to your door. He was nearly out when he turned around and said, “Actually, there’s one more thing I wanted to do.”

You raised an eyebrow in question and were thoroughly surprised when Steve pecked you on the lips and murmured, “I wasn’t lying when I said I loved you. I was drunk, but I wasn’t lying.”

And with a wave of his hand he was gone, leaving you shocked and breath-taken in the doorway.  


Genre: SMUT AF


Warnings: None? Idk just smut. Also, BAD WRITING.

A/n: I seriously only write smut when I’m on my period. Actually I only WRITE on my period. Oh well. It’s 1:30 and I need to do my math. PEACE OUT YO

“Dan? You okay in there?” You ask your husband, after knocking on the clinic restroom door. He had been stuck inside for about fifteen minutes now and was still having trouble. The both of you were at a fertility clinic where you had been running through tests for about a month or so. Dan was currently going through his final test, maybe with a little difficulty.

“Just imagine me, on the bed, surrounded by rose petals with candles, in that new leather get up you got for me.” You try to seduce him through the door and judging by the groans that he emitted, it was working. The nurse by my side seemed to turn the deep shade of red, as she started giggling.

I smiled sheepishly at her before turning back to the door. Dan had been persuading you to start trying for about several months and you had only just agreed a month ago on the conditions that nobody should stress out about it and that you both went through the series of infertility tests just in case.

“Gah Fuck!” You hear Dan moan through the door as he reached his climax or what you assumed to be it and emerged from the restroom a few minutes later. His hair was slightly disheveled and damp, starting to curl at the ends. He slammed the specimen onto the nurses palm before turning to you and giving a weak grin.

“You did it,” You congratulate him as you slip your fingers into his palm, pecking him on the cheek. He squeezes your hand tightly as the nurse leads you to the consultation room, gesturing for you to sit on the couch.

“Doctor Richards will be with you after we finish testing the specimens. Feel free to make yourself comfortable.” She informed, before scurrying out of the room.

You lean your head against Dan’s chest as you feel his breath rise and fall. His hand is still tightly wound with yours and he places a kiss on your scalp. “Y/n, what if my sperm count is too low?”

“Then we’ll try to fix it. Why would you think it low anyway?”

“I sit with my laptop on my lap all day, I wear tight jeans , I don’t exercise. There’s a fuck load of reasons why.” His heart rate began to quicken, his breaths becoming shallower. You kiss the back of his hand and start drawing soothing circles around his knuckles. Not knowing how to answer you sigh and comfortingly squeeze his hand twice.

“Dan, just calm down. Stressing out won’t help either.” You whisper after a while. Dan responds by leaning his head against yours and throwing his arm around your shoulder.

The door creaks open and a hint of white can be seen. “So, I have your results…”

“So…” Dan says after you had reached the privacy of your flat. He stares at you as you take off your coat and threw it on the floor next to your bed, taking both of your hands in his. “We can start trying now,”

“Finally.” You smile as he kisses your forehead, the Doctor had given him the all clear. Your heart starts to pump faster at the thought of being able to become parents, to say you were excited AF was an understatement, you were fucking exhilarated (pun intended).

“Finally?! I was asking you for years!"He exaggerates, a goofy grin upon his face.

"Years pssh,” You remark, rolling your eyes, “ We haven’t even been married for a year. Besides I wasn’t ready.”

“I’m glad you are now,” He murmurs, tilting his head forward. Your foreheads now pressed together as he plays with your fingers.

“Hey, y/n?” He adds in a slightly more animated tone


“I bet I can knock you up in one try.” He claims, smirking.

“Is that a challenge Mr Howell?” You questioned, giggling at him

“ You bet it is, Mrs Howell.” And with that he pushes you onto the bed, and licks his lips before placing his palms on your thighs. He starts to nip at your neck which he knows is your weakness. “F-fuck,” You manage to stutter as your body quivered in anticipation.

He sucks on your collarbone, making sure to leave a mark. He rips off your top and roughly unclasps your bra, throwing them over his shoulders once he was done.

“You’re so beautiful, Y/n” He breathes, as his soft, cocoa-coloured eyes traced over your bare chested body. He starts to trail kisses down your torso, pulling down your skirt as he reached your thighs. He toys with the waistband of your underwear, teasing you slowly.

“Get on with it, Howell,” You command, barely being able to keep yourself from eliciting a moan. He tears of your underwear in one fluid motion and disposes it like the others. “No need for those anymore,” He simpers, spreading your legs apart.

He runs his tongue along your folds, your senses heightening and pupils dilating. Then he does it, plunges in without a warning, pumping slowly as his tongue creates friction against your walls. You grab on to bunches of his hair as you lean back, screaming in pleasure.

“Oh god, fuck!” You yell as an orgasm wrecks your body, releasing into Dan’s mouth. He takes it all in, swallowing hard.

“One more time, Darling,” He pleads. You whimper an approval barely even being able to keep yourself together. You gaze in awe as Dan removes every article of clothing he had on, the light doing justice for his body, hitting it in all the right places.

He starts to reach for a condom then remembers with a smug look on his face. He pins you against the bed, pressing one finger to your lips as you start to protest. He lowers himself and pressed his sweet lips against. Oh how he molds perfectly with you, as he presses softly.

“Are you ready?” He asks. You nod your head to give him permission. He enters you slowly, before picking up the pace as you moan his name. Your hands clutching his neck, his breath hot on your nose. “Fuck, fuckity fuck” he curses as you clench around him. Your body still sensitive from your first, it doesn’t take long for you to feel your second one build up in your stomach.

You squeeze your eyes shut as Dan urges you to let go. “On three,” He groans.

Before you could even finish, the both of you climaxed together and collapsed on the bed.

“You think that did the trick?” You giggle.