i remember the first time i saw this photo in 2008

A Scarecrow For God

by reddit user survivalprocedure

“Can I take your picture?” Larissa sat a few feet away from me on the grey velvet sofa as I aimed my iPhone towards her. I stared at the screen intently for a moment before shifting my focus, looking over the brim of the phone at her defeated, hopeless state portrayed by bloodshot eyes.

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Saying goodbye to my 20s and my birthday wish to all my young hopefuls.

Today I will be saying goodbye to my 20′s. It has never been so clear to me that time is indeed real, and what you do with your time is crucial.

I remember when I turned 20.. actually, I don’t. My memories are blurry when I was young, solely because I choose not to care, because I was 20 and I thought I had all the time in the world. All I knew was that I was young, I was healthy,  I cared only about spending time with my boyfriend (I was determined to get married to him at the age of 21), and that I have to submit my assignment to my legal professor by Monday. Mediocre, and lazy- that was me. At 20, I had no idea that at 9.9 years later I would be in the kitchen of my apartment in the heart of Los Angeles, and writing this, with you in mind. Also at 20, I went to my first indie band rock show, and that changed EVERYTHING. And so, my life lessons began..

At 21, I decided I didn’t want to settle down so soon, I wasn’t ready. I went to an entirely different direction, went into music and discovered that my whole childhood of loving music and singing wasn’t a scam, and I started writing songs of my own.

Me at 20

22 (2008) was when I learned about dignity. I walked into my first record label meeting, sitting across a man, leaning back in his corporate chair telling me I will not go far in the music industry if I
1) kept my headscarves on
2) sang my English songs.
I said no thank you, and proceeded to (with my little knowledge of Company law that I learned in school) start my own company called Yuna Room Records, with my 22 year old cousin, Wawa. We still run this company today. Also this year, I got interviewed for the very first time by my favorite music magazine at the time, Junk, by my all time fav person today, Didi Ramlan.

Young Yuna with bandmates Efry, Paan, Adil.

22 was also when I learned that quality is key. I wrote a song called Dan Sebenarnya, and was willing to let the rough recording of it live forever. Turns out I was wrong, radio wouldn’t play my music because of the crappy quality. I went to get a RM1000(about USD$200) loan from my dad, went to a professional recording studio, to record an EP so the radios will stop saying no to my song.

My bedroom in university. You can see my passion for photography and a photo of me performing my first show with a guitar on the wall, and my law notes sprawled across the table as I stay up studying.

23 (2009) I learned how to manage my financials. I received my first royalty paycheck in the mail, and when I opened it I had to sit down and made sure if it was meant for me, and remember thinking if I deserved all of it. Dan Sebenarnya EP was being downloaded almost 100,000 times a month, my first paycheck was almost RM30k. Too much. I paid off my dad’s loan, split it with my bandmates who helped recording it in the studio with me, and started my savings account and learned how to pay tax. I also graduated from legal studies this year.

With friends from law school. Already you can tell I’m out of place.

24 (2010) I learned that even if I thought I worked really hard for something, second place is a good place to be. I competed in my first national tv music award show performing my song, and lost to a very talented young man who I am now close friends with Aizat Amdan. Sometimes you have to know that some things are just not meant for you. That night, I didn’t get an award, but I got a wonderful friend that I can depend on forever. 2 years later, I got an award that was taken away from me, but because of this incident, I had already learned how to not care so much about awards. Awards do not define you. I also graduated this year, earning my degree in legal studies. Finally!

25. (2011) I learned to take a leap of faith. I went to America with a small bag and a big dream. I was a shy foreigner, I was alone and I was a little bit scared. But, I knew that if I don’t start talking, I will not go anywhere. Being awkward and shy is a waste of time, I learned. The more you want to talk to people, the more respectful you are, the more you will learn.

I learned that you are the only person who can sabotage yourself. When people say you can’t, the only person who can prove them wrong is yourself.

Pharell and I, 2011.

My very first apartment in Los Angeles. I remember every dollar i made from work was to pay for this rent.. I ate a lot of instant noodles and shopped at dollar stores. My furnitures (and one piano that I still have) were all hand-me-downs from my friend, Niles (now a big time DJ, KSHMR!)

26. (2012) I learned how to travel and perform at the same time. I was in different cities everyday, performing every night. Something I didn’t know I could do. I saw people from all races showing up at my show, a diversity and I learned to loved them all, something I didn’t know existed. All my ignorance and stereotypes melted away just from traveling across America. I also learned about loyalty, and the meaning of friendship. Didi, Faiz, Lincoln formed this experience together with me and I will never forget it.

Faiz, Didi and Lincoln, us on the road, across the country for a month in 2012.

Lollapalooza 2013.

27.(2013) I learned about the REAL treasures in life. That your parents are the true treasure that you will never find anywhere else, at any point of your life.  That breaking their hearts is never an option for as long as you live. 

My last moments with my late grandfather. I miss him so much.

28.(2014)  I learned that money is not everything. You can make millions, but you can’t buy happiness. Money will not save lives. I tried my best to save my uncle or my grandfather from their sickness with whatever money I had, and I lost this battle. God saves lives, and he takes them at His will. You can plan, but He is the best planner.

I learned that fame is not everything. You can have millions of followers, a few friends who thinks you’re awesome, but you can still feel very alone. Being liked, or dislike, does not give you infinite happiness. I also learned the horrible truth that for some, fame and money is everything.Time is the best gift you can give to your loved ones.

I learned that physical beauty of a person means nothing. We are all flawed. I am flawed. I learned how to see people’s hearts and hoping that my heart is worth seeing. I learned that being in love is not everything. I learned how to piece myself back together slowly after someone has broken every fragile part of me. I learned that the person you spend your time with can either bring the best out of you, or unleash a monster inside of you. People come into your life to teach you valuable lessons, and you have to learn from it. I learned that if you lose someone, it doesn’t mean its because you’re not worth it. It just means you’re growing. How you rise above this, will be your life’s best victory.

29,(2015-today) this is my favorite year. I learned to let go, and learned to realize that if you don’t love yourself, you can’t love someone else. I learned that I was not entirely healthy, and decided to take care of myself better before it’s too late.

I learned that you can find love in the calmness of being in someone’s presence. Never disrupt that calmness. ‘Don’t be an idiot’, I tell myself, ‘Don’t screw this up!’

I learned to stop caring what people have to say about me, because of the simple reason being- they have no clue what’s going on. They don’t deserve a space in my thought process. I learned about having the courage to be me. I learned the hard way, that there are givers, and takers. There are people who are here to take advantage of me and use me, and I have to walk away from them. I learned to shut doors to people who sees life in a negative way without any second guesses. I learned how to say no when people try to take away the best qualities that I’ve taken all these years to shape. I learned how to sever ties with people who drain my energy. I learned how to fight for my identity. I learned how to fight for my life and the lives of people that I care about. Most importantly, after all these years of thinking I should be this and that, I want this, I want that, .. blablabla. I learned one important thing - its not about me. It’s about how can I contribute to make the world a better place.

Al-fatihah for Aina.

On my 30th birthday, I don’t need gifts. I just wish for my young fans to not waste their time. Know that your time is yours, but it’s not yours. If you are in your 20′s, spend your time wisely. Go have fun, you’re young, but don’t forget to contribute your energy, you’re young. Time flies, but take your time learning. Make mistakes, but learn from them. Don’t try to grow up too fast, stay in your zone and be present as much as you can. Remember, you are so much more than what people say about you. People rush you into doing things.. but ask yourself what do YOU want? Go and live life fully, learn as much as you can. Achieve greatness and bring out greatness in others as well. Be aware of whats happening in the world, not just yours. Learn to see whats on the other side, and try not to settle in what your setup has been set up for you. 

Be woke. Be intelligent. Be there for the people who need you. Keep your head up and be confident, but know when to keep your head down and be humble. Never underestimate what your heart tells you. It’s okay to be wrong, its okay to fail and know that you are flawed, and life will prove this to you again and again. Know that you will rise, again and again. Being flawless comes after you learned that you can accept your flaws and not giving up doing something beautiful for the world.

Happy birthday to me and to you, here’s to us, who will see today as Day 1.


The Hollywood Reporter podcast here

The 31-year-old actor, best known as the male star of the fantasy ‘Twilight’ franchise, reflects on sudden celebrity, 'Twihard’ fanatics and their strong feelings about his former relationship and how his 10-year career-reinvention plan is operating right on schedule.

“As soon as I signed on to do multiple sequels to [the 2008 film Twilight], I was like, 'It’s gonna take 10 years to get over this,’” the actor Robert Pattinson says as we sit down at the offices of The Hollywood Reporter to record an episode of THR’s 'Awards Chatter’ podcast.

“I said that to my agent. And it took 10 years.” Indeed, nearly a full decade after playing the brooding vampire Edward Cullen in a movie for the first of five times in five years, and in so doing rocketing to international stardom, if not acclaim, the dashing 31-year-old Brit is attracting the best reviews of his career. Ironically, they are coming for his work in Good Time, an indie crime-thriller in which he buries his good looks behind a goatee, greasy hair and a thick Queens accent in order to bring to life a small-time crook who winds up in big trouble in present-day New York. “I just really, really went after it,” he says with a smile.

Pattinson, who was born in London, fell in love with music long before acting. A foray into modeling, starting around the age of 12, exposed him for the first time to auditions, and he began to dabble in drama, as well, but was discouraged from pursuing the creative arts by his own drama teacher. Nevertheless, at the urging of his father, he joined a local amateur theater company and, after landing his first role, was spotted by an agent who soon signed him as a client.

He quickly began auditioning for professional jobs — the first film he went out for was 2004’s Troy (he didn’t get it), the first one he got was 2004’s Vanity Fair (his scenes were eventually cut) and the first that put him on the map was 2005’s Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (from which he got American representation). Hollywood expressed only mild interest in him, at the time, so he went back to England, still debating whether or not he wished to pursue acting. “Every single time I was just about to say, 'I’m done with this,’” he recalls, “I would get another one,” including a TV movie in which he played a WWII pilot suffering from PTSD and an indie film in which he played a young Salvador Dali.

Throughout that period, Pattinson would occasionally send audition tapes to Los Angeles for roles that appealed to him in America. One, for a rom-com, led to the opportunity for an in-person audition, so he flew to America and stayed on the couch of his American agent as he prepared to go in for it. That audition did not pan out, but while in town he went in for another, with Thirteen director Catherine Hardwicke, for a part in what he understood to be an indie movie based on a low-profile book about a vampire.

Hardwicke already had seen some 5,000 young actors before Pattinson came by her house to audition. “I was the last person they saw,” he recalls, noting that he had a panic attack — and took a Valium — on his way out the door to go to the audition. Shortly thereafter, despite some reservations on the part of the film’s producers (“They all thought I looked really old, and I was pretty chubby at the time, too”), he won the part (“I kinda knew I was gonna get it”) and went to work. Following a shoot in which his interpretation of the character didn’t always mesh with the producers’ and his agents had to fly in to save his job (“I was very argumentative”), the film was released — and changed his life forever.

“Twi-hards,” as the Twilight franchise’s most obsessive fans came to be known, soon descended upon Pattinson, and became particularly passionate — with delight or dismay — when it became apparent that he and Stewart were involved with each other in real life. “The real kind of vocal ones — I think it’s a very, very, very small group — are quite educated women between the ages of 28 and 60,” he says. “I mean, that’s quite a lot of women. But older. They’re not 'old,’ obviously, but they’re not teenagers at all. And that’s what people never really realized. The initial wave of them was young, but the [mainstays] are significantly older.” He says, when asked if dating Stewart gave them red meat:

“People would just imagine anyway — like, even when we weren’t together, people were saying we were anyway. It doesn’t make a difference. Still now! It definitely does change the paparazzi involvement in your life — like, 100%. It’s just an economic thing: there’s just two people in a photo, rather than [one]. And the most relatable thing for anyone who reads a gossip magazine is, 'What’s the state of a relationship?’”

Pattinson’s Twilight-era was surreal. He had been catapulted onto Hollywood’s A-list, which came with fame and fortune, but also a loss of privacy and certain preconceptions about what he wanted — or was capable of doing — as an actor.

In-between the Twilight films, he acted in others, including 2010’s Remember Me, 2011’s Water for Elephants and 2012’s Bel Ami, hoping to show his broader range, but also keeping him constantly at work. “I was so busy up until 25 or something that I never had time to really process anything — you’re just in the eye of the storm,” he says. “When the series was sort of ending and I’d slowed down a little bit, I was like, 'Oh, the life you had previously has died and you’re in this other world’… I was sort of freaking out a little bit.”

Even so, he never doubted the wisdom of agreeing to be a part of the franchise. “I’ve never really felt trapped by it,” he says. “I’ve always known it was the right move.” He adds, “I wouldn’t have done any of this other stuff if not for that.”

That “other stuff” began with an unexpected straight offer from auteur David Cronenberg to star in 2012’s Cosmopolis, which he has described as a life-changing experience. It reminded him why he wanted to be an actor and also solidified his foremost desire for the coming years: to work with great filmmakers. “I was aware of a credibility deficit,” he acknowledges. “And so you think, 'Well, if [Werner] Herzog and Anton Corbijn and all these people are hiring me, well, you’re gonna have to shit on your heroes if you want to shit on me.’”

Over the years since, Pattinson has fulfilled his objective. In 2014, he reteamed with Cronenberg, on Map to the Stars, and also starred in David Michod’s The Rover, both of which premiered at the Cannes Film Festival. In 2015, he appeared in Herzog’s Queen of the Desert and Corbijn’s Life. He turned up in James Gray’s The Lost City of Z in 2016.

And then he was back to Cannes this past May as the “romantic psychopath” in indie filmmakers’ Josh Safdie and Benny Safdie’s “first movie-movie” (their words), Good Time, which Pattinson says feels like a movie “on crack, just the pace of it,” and which was greeted with a six-minute standing ovation and magnificent reviews (it has a 94 percent positive rating on RottenTomateos.com).

Pattinson reportedly came very close to being awarded the jury’s best actor prize. With the film’s Aug. 11 release date rapidly approaching, Pattinson says he is enjoying being part of a movie this good and this well-received, and isn’t too worried about what happens next weekend. “I don’t even care if they make money at all,” he says of his post-Twilight films, with a twinkle in his eye. “Like, literally. As long as I can get another one.”

Never the same. 2

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Featuring: Harrison Osterfield and Sam Holland

Words: 2718

Warnings: -

Taggs: @imabloodynerd @positivethoughtsforever  @micawber69   @captainboomerangsunicorn

Request: -

Notes: here you go! Thank you for the respond to the first part, I hope you like this one as well!

Originally posted by tomshollandss


During the walk, the two of them did most of the talking, telling (Y/N) about the places they passed by. She basically just nodded, trying to remember all the new information they were giving her. It didn’t really feel like she was with an actor, an important one actually. He behaved just like any other person she had ever met, even nicer. He and Harrison were constantly teasing each other. It was obvious that they had known each other for a very long time.

“Richmond park” Harrison suddenly said when you turned a corner.

“It looks like a forest” was the first thing (Y/N) said. They both laughed.

“Wait until you see the stags” Tom told her. She gasped and looked at him.

“Really?” She asked.

“100%” he replied with a bigger smile.

“Oh my… I’ve never seen one!” She exclaimed, almost too excited.

“It’s your lucky day then” Harrison winked.

She bit her lip and walked a bit faster, making them chuckle, but she didn’t care. She had never seen those animals and seen them there, in the middle of a park in London was something she would have never imagined. There was no way she was waiting. Somehow, Tessa felt her excitement and barked before walking along with her new friend. It looked like she preferred to go faster.

“C’mon Tessa!” (Y/N) exclaimed. She barked again and ran a little.

“Hey! I’m the one who says that!” She heard Tom. She chuckled and looked at him.

“Don’t worry, I will not steal her from you” she told him.

“Like you could” Tom smirked.

“I don’t know, man. Tessa really likes her” Harrison teased.

“Shut up” Tom replied making him laugh.

Soon they walked into the park. Immediately, (Y/N) looked around, expecting to see a deer running in front of her but they said that they would have to walk a bit further into the park to see them. She had seen maps of the place so she knew it was huge, just like most parks in London, so it didn’t surprise her at all.

“Where are you from?” Harrison asked. (Y/N) raised an eyebrow at him. “You have an accent” he shrugged.

“Busted” she smiled. “I’m from Spain” she told them.

“Spain? I’ve been there!” Tom exclaimed after taking the leash off Tessa so she could run freely for a while. “We filmed part of The Impossible in Alicante” he told.

“Haven’t been there, but the movie was amazing” she replied.

“Haven’t been there?” Tom frowned.

“Alicante is on the east, I’m from the west” (Y/N) explained with a shrug. He nodded silently. “But I loved that movie. I think I’ve watched it six times at least” she said making him smile again. “It’s really intense” she shrugged.

“Not bad for a 13 years-old-boy” Harrison teased, making her laugh.

“Jealousy speaking?” Tom smirked.

They started to tease each other again so she just rolled her eyes and looked around. The park was beautiful. Everything was green, despite the summer, she could see squirrels, different kind of birds, children playing… She couldn’t even see the other side of the park. It could be infinite and she wouldn’t know it. She took a deep breath and let it out. This kind of spaces were so relaxing to her. Where (Y/N) came from, there weren’t places like this where you could just go and relax. In her town, most parks were crowded with screaming kids and equally annoying parents. Not like this one.

“You like it?” Tom asked her.

“I love it” she replied looking at him. He smiled and looked around as well. 

“Look!” He suddenly said pointing to his left.

The three of them stopped on their tracks and looked towards where Tom was pointing. It was a deer!  (Y/N) gasped and moved so she could see it properly. It was far, but close enough to see it properly. Immediately, she put her hand in her pocket to take her phone and take a photo but then she remembered she didn’t have it with her.

“I can take it” Tom said. She looked at him confused. “I can take photos and send them to you later” he offered.

“You don’t mind?” She smiled.

“Of course not” he replied with a shrug before he started taking photos of the animals and also of the park itself, like he was reading (Y/N)’s mind.

It was true that she was going to be able to just come to the park any time she wanted and take pictures, but this was the first time and she wanted to have memories of it. While  (Y/N) observed everything and Tom took pictures or left her the phone to take them, Harrison was playing around with Tessa, throwing the ball so she would fetch her and bring it back. After a while, she sat down underneath a tree and leaned against it.

“So it’s your first time here?” Tom asked as he watched Tessa chasing after a squirrel.

“Not really” she replied. “My brother moved here 12 years ago so I’ve come many times. But I had never been to Kingston” she told him. “The first time I visited London was in 2008 and I honestly hated it” she admitted.

“What?” Tom asked surprised. (Y/N) laughed and shrugged.

“I was 12 years old, I wasn’t used to walking too much and my brother wanted us to see everything in three days. You can imagine how it turned out” she told him. He chuckled and nodded. “I ended up exhausted. But when I came back in 2012 I loved it” she shrugged.  

“Why the change of heart?” He asked looking at her.

“I don’t know…it was a calmer trip I guess, we actually saw places, we could enjoy it properly and it was also the first time I discovered the city by my own” she explained. Tom gave her a questioning look. “After lunch my father and my brother wanted to go to pubs and chill, I wanted to keep on visiting places so I just took an underground map and left”

“And your father was okay with that?” Tom questioned with a smile. She shrugged, smiling at the memories.

“As long as I knew how to go back to my brother’s place, he was okay with it” (Y/N) said.

“That’s cool” Tom nodded. “And…what are you doing here?” he asked after a while of silence.

“An internship to finish my master” she simply replied.

“Sounds interesting” he commented. “What’s the master about?”

“Audiovisual Translation” she told him before explaining herself. “You know, subtitling and that kind of stuff”

“That’s super cool!” He exclaimed making her laugh. He was even more excited about the internship than herself.

“I can’t wait to start to be honest” she admitted.

“I’m sure you will be awesome. I mean…you’re English is flawless” he said.

“Not that much but thank you” she smiled sweetly at him.

“It’s really good” he insisted. She laughed and shrugged, not really knowing what to say.

Silence fell between the two of them as she took in her surroundings while Harrison was still playing with Tessa. She was grateful she had found them today. They had helped her so much. She knew she would have ended up finding her way back home but not without wandering the streets for a long time.

“Hey girl!” (Y/N) came out of her thoughts when Tessa hurried over Tom, jumping over him, licking his face playfully. With a tired sigh, Harrison sat down next to Tom. “You’re having fun, huh? I know” he said rubbing her head and behind her ears.

“Get a room” she mumbled making Harrison laugh his head off.

“Don’t listen to her Tess, she’s just jealous” Tom told the animal, making her smile.

Tom spent a while playing around with Tessa as (Y/N) and Harrison had a similar conversation as the one she had had with Tom previously.

“So your brother lives in the city?” He asked. She nodded with a small smile.

“He works in marketing and advertising” she explained.

“Sounds cool” Harrison smiled. (Y/N) nodded again smiling even more.

She was so proud of her brother. He had worked so hard to be where he was. He came to UK with a scholarship and finished his degree here. Afterwards, he couldn’t find a job so he spent years working from restaurant to restaurant, pub to pub, until he found the opportunity to work in his field. He took it and there he was, having the time of his life.

“Guys we should get going” Tom said walking over you two. “It’s going to start raining soon” he added. You two looked up at the sky and got up. He was right.

The walk back to Tom’s place was almost completely silent. (Y/N) asked them a few things about the neighbourhood, which they replied immediately. Before she realised it, they were at Tom’s porch.

“I’ll get your phone” Harrison said walking in first, leaving the two of them alone.

“Do you…want to stay for dinner?” He asked, blushing a little.

“Thank you but I should get home. I’m going to visit my brother tomorrow and it’s a long ride” she shrugged. “But thank you” she repeated.

“No problem” he shrugged shoving his hands in his front pockets.

He debated whether he should ask her out or not. She was adorable, nice and so beautiful, and she was probably taken. A girl like her wouldn’t be single for too long so he was almost sure that she had a boyfriend waiting for her back in Spain. The problem was that he really wanted to see her again. He wanted to get to know her, be her friend at least. But he didn’t want to scare the girl off.

“Here you have” Harrison said coming out with her phone.

“Thank you!” (Y/N) said taking it immediately. She turned it on, all the notifications popping up on the screen. She ignored all of them and looked for the address.

“That’s the address?” Harrison asked.

“Yeah, you know where it is?” (Y/N) asked them.

“It’s just a couple of streets away!” Harrison exclaimed with a smile. “You’ll be there in no time” he added.

“Really? Wow, thanks God!” She sighed relieved. “Thank you so much guys, you’ve been so nice” she smiled at them.

“Anytime” Harrison shrugged. “It was really nice to meet you” he added giving her a quick hug. “Maybe you can stay for dinner?”

“I already asked her” Tom replied looking at Harrison. She frowned a little at the look they shared. Suddenly, Harrison smirked and nodded.

“I’ll order a pizza. Maybe Sam or Harry can come over” he said before disappearing into the house.

“So…” Tom sighed before looking at her again. “We should exchange numbers” he said quickly. (Y/N) raised an eyebrow but before she could say anything, he kept on talking. “So I can send you the photos, of course” he added.

“Oh! Right!” She exclaimed. “I completely forgot” she added. “I’ll give you mine and you send them to me?”

“Sure” he nodded, taking out his own phone. “Shoot” he said when he was ready to type.

When she told him the number, they shared an awkward goodbye hug. He even asked her once again if she wanted to stay but she didn’t want to impose herself. Plus, she was exhausted and wanted to take a shower and chill watching something on Netflix before going to sleep. He even offered to take her home but it was so close, according to the maps, that she didn’t want to bother him any longer. Finally, after promising he would send the photos, he let her walked away.

Once he couldn’t see you anymore, Tom walked into the house and closed the door, leaning against it with his eyes closed. It had been a long time since he didn’t felt so attracted towards a girl and he didn’t even know how to act. He was sure he had made a total fool of himself. After a few more minutes, he pushed himself off the door and walked to the kitchen where Harrison was waiting for him with a stupid smirk on his face.

“Don’t say anything” Tom said as he opened the fridge.

“You liked her”, his friend stated. Tom gulped, taking water from the fridge and drinking straight from the bottle to have some time before answering.

“I didn’t” Tom finally said. Harrison laughed and shook his head.

“I know you, Holland. You liked her”, he shrugged. “I can’t really blame you. She’s funny, interesting…you should ask her out”

“What? No” Tom replied immediately, placing the bottle back into the fridge. He looked at Harrison, who had an eyebrow raised. Tom sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I didn’t like her, not in that way, so I’m not asking her out” he said. “And I’m going to take a shower” he added before Harrison could tease him even more.

“The pizza will be here in 30 minutes! And Sam is on his way!” Harrison exclaimed while Tom left the kitchen.

Tom walked into his room, closing the door behind him and immediately taking off his t-shirt. He sat down in bed and took out his phone, looking at the photos he had taken today. Some of them were beautiful. He stopped when he saw a selfie taken by (Y/N) of the two of them. He didn’t even remember it but he liked it. No, he didn’t like her. With a sigh he sent them all to her with a here you go!

Then he walked into his bathroom to take that damn shower that would help him clear his head. Why did Harrison have to get into his head? He had just met her, of course he didn’t like her! It didn’t matter how interesting he thought she, she was still a stranger to him. He wrapped a towel around his waist and came back to the room once he was done showering.

“Thomas!” He heard Sam’s voice from downstairs. Probably the pizza was there too.

He quickly got changed into some sweatpants and a tanktop before going downstairs. Indeed, the pizzas were on the table, along with some beers, and Harrison and his brother were seated on the coach. Tom hugged Sam as hello and sat on the sofa, immediately taking a slice of pizza, not really being aware of how hungry he was until that moment.

“So what did you do today?” Sam asked. Tom looked at him and narrowed his eyes when he saw Sam smirking.

“You told him?” Tom asked Harrison.

“Of course I did” Harrison laughed before taking a sip from his beer.

“Unbelievable” Tom sighed shaking his head. “What did he say?”

“That you met a girl today and you liked her” Sam shrugged. Tom glared Harrison before looking at his brother once again.

“I did not like her, okay? I just think she was nice” he shrugged.

“Why don’t you ask her out?” Harrison asked. Tom rolled his eyes, taking his can of beer.

“Why should I do that?” Tom sighed. It kind of annoyed him how stupid they were being about this.

“If you liked her…” Sam shrugged.

“Fuck, I did not!” Tom exclaimed, almost angry at that point.

“Oh man, you definitely did” Sam laughed looking at Harrison. “You always get too moody when you like a girl” he added.

“I don’t do that” Tom frowned. “I didn’t like her that way. She could be a great friend though” he shrugged. Harrison smirked and took a slice of pizza.

“Then why don’t you invite her to the Spiderman screening at the Olympic?” Harrison said casually.

“That’s a good idea, actually” Sam agreed taking another slice. Tom sighed and left the can on the table, considering the idea.

“I don’t know” he mumbled. “There will be fans there and press”

“So? If she’s just a potential friend, it shouldn’t be a problem” Harrison said. Tom knew he was testing him, to see his reaction. “Unless, you don’t want the press and the fans know about her for some secret reason you’re hiding from us” he added.

“Fine. I’ll invite her” Tom finally said. Although he would say almost anything at that point just to shut them up.

‘Girlboss’ Star Britt Robertson on Playing Sophia Amoruso: ‘She’s Dumb and She’s Smart, She’s Driven and She’s Lazy’
Britt Robertson as Sophia in ‘Girlboss’ (Photo: Netflix)

It wasn’t easy finding the right girl boss to play the title character of the new Netflix series, Girlboss. “We saw hundreds of women,” creator Kay Cannon reveals to Yahoo TV. “I knew the show lived or died by who was cast in that role.” After all, the chosen actress has the difficult task of stepping into the vintage wardrobe worn by Sophia Amoruso, a struggling San Francisco resident who parlayed her thrifty thrift store purchases into a burgeoning eBay empire and, later, the successfully fashion label, Nasty Gal. “I was trying to find someone who could capture the real Sophia,” Cannon says. “Which is to say, beautiful, but also an actress with a lot of depth, who can also be funny and look great in clothes. That was really important because when you meet Sophia, you’re like ‘You look amazing in everything you wear!’ She’s got this great sense of style.”

Cannon eventually found her leading lady in the form of Tomorrowland star Britt Robertson. But the actress’s style was lacking when she initially auditioned for the part. “When she first auditioned, she had a real girl next door quality,” Cannon remembers. “We had her come in again, and told her to rock it up a little bit. And that time, when she left the room I was like, ‘She’s it. She’s everything we want for that character.”

Robertson herself is equally taken with Girlboss‘s boss. “Kay’s point of view is really fascinating; I love the way she sees the world,” the 27-year-old actress remarks in a separate interview. “She has such a fun-loving nature, and would always have this rule of allowing me to get in a ‘fun run’ on every scene, where I could say anything or do anything. That was a huge help, especially in the beginning when I was trying to get comfortable with the character.” We spoke with Robertson about playing a real-world fashion icon, and her own eBay experiences.

How aware were you of Sophia’s story, or Nasty Gal, before you signed on to the series?
I had never even heard of Nasty Gal or Sophia; I looked up a few things before I went to the audition, but I mainly prepared by reading the script. Once I got the role I did a lot of research: I watched her interviews, I went to her store, I spent time with her, I read her book, all of that stuff.

In the time you spent with her, is there one element of her personality you knew you most wanted to capture in your own performance?
I knew it was important to figure out what it was about her that made her so successful. When I got to know her, I realized that it’s her passion and her drive, her ability to cut any corner and to push past any sort of barrier in order to get the things that she wanted and felt passionate about. That could be her greatest flaw in some moments, but it’s also her most wonderful trait as well. She’s dumb and she’s smart, she’s driven and she’s lazy. She’s a big, fat contradiction most of the time.

The show is almost structured like a superhero origin story. We watch as she figures out her own identity over the course of the season.
Exactly, and I think that was the most exciting part for Kay, being able to show the rags to riches portion of Sophia’s story. She talks a lot about that in her book: how she jumped into dumpsters for bagels, and wasn’t able to fix a leak in her wall. All of those things are very true to what she was experiencing at that time, when she became, essentially, successful overnight. I think that’s what makes her more relatable — being able to see how messed up she was, and how much she really pulled it together. In the first season you’ll experience her first two years of Nasty Gal: You’ll see her rise to the top on eBay, until she’s ultimately kicked off of eBay and starts her own site. That all takes place from 2006 to 2008, and by the end of this season you get to see the launch of Nasty Gal.

The real Sophia Amoruso attends the ‘Girlboss’ premiere (Photo by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP)

It’s funny — 2006 isn’t so long ago, but it feels like a whole different world, one without smartphones and social media.
Yeah, the show really does feel like a period piece in so many ways. People used MySpace rather than Facebook, and while [social media] was a way of communicating with people, it was used more as a business model. I think it’s interesting to see how far we’ve jumped just in that short amount of time.

Do you remember when you first bought something off of eBay?
My mom was really big into eBay! [Laughs.] I didn’t use eBay myself; I was just young enough to not have an account or anything. But my mom was super into it. She had a little section in this antique shop in South Carolina, and she would buy all of these vintage clothes. They would be like tapestry almost, hand-sewn. She had the most uninteresting portion of that antique shop to me, but it’s what she loved. So I remember eBay was a really big thing in our household for a long time.

Britt Robertson as Sophia in ‘Girlboss’ (Photo: Netflix)

Girlboss uses San Francisco very well. Was it fun to get to know that city through the show?
We spent two or three weeks there, just exclusively doing exteriors. There’s one episode where we go on a tour of San Francisco, so Sophia can be inspired by the city. It’s changed so much in the last 10 years as well, with the rise of the technology companies. That whole part of San Francisco has been taken over. The real Sofia speaks to that a lot now; she says that she doesn’t even recognize the city. I think it was important for to present the city as she remembers it. It’s probably very nostalgic for her.

The first scene of the series finds Sophia stuck on one of the city’s famous hilly streets where her car stalls out just as a trolley is approaching. It’s a fun way to begin the show. What do you remember about shooting that particular sequence?
That was funny scene actually, because the day before shooting it, I had torn my groin muscle! I had to run the length of the Golden Gate Bridge [for another scene] a couple of days before that, and I’m really out of shape, so I tore something. Then, for another scene, I had to run down a hill in ginormous heels, and all of a sudden I felt this gnarly sharp pain. We had to wrap filming that day a little bit early. So it was a big deal: How was I going to shoot this scene where I had to literally be pushing a car up a hill? And we were only going to have one day to film it because they had to shut down the street and bring in a trolley.

Robertson’s Golden Gate Bridge run in ‘Girlboss’ (Photo: Netflix)

I rested the day before, and then while we were shooting, I had all this tape holding me together. The grips did a lot of the heavy lifting: I wasn’t pushing the car most of the time, although sometimes I did. It’s such a cool shot, and a great way to start the show. It gives you an essence of how this woman is. I remember that, towards the end, we had one shot left where I had to push the car, and I just felt this sharp pain go through my body. I broke out into tears and collapsed. I felt like such a loser: I couldn’t sustain just that one last shot! But, we got it and it looks good, so I’m happy with it.

Robertson pushing her broken-down car in ‘Girlboss’ (Photo: Netflix)

RuPaul and Norm McDonald have supporting roles on the show as Sophia’s neighbor and boss, respectively. What was it like to work with them?
So fun! I love RuPaul. He’s such a sweetheart, and just the coolest dude. There are so many genuine moments in the show where he’s legitimately cracking me up. He had a tough time learning the lines, but he didn’t even need to because he’s just that good. He could say anything, and it would be funny. We had so many cool people on the show. Ru’s there, Norm’s there. In between takes, Ru would be doing dirty charades for everyone, and Norm would be putting on a stand-up routine. It was really fun just to have those guys around, and watching them enjoy themselves as much as we were enjoying them.

RuPaul as Sophia’s neighbor and Britt Robertson as Sophia in ‘Girlboss’ (Photo: Netflix)

Charlize Theron is an executive producer on the series. Was she on set often?
She was super involved, especially early on. Once we got going, she was really sweet and let me do my thing. That would have been crazy stressful if she was there everyday. I would have been like, “Britt, I think you kinda suck today.” [Laughs.] Early on, she was at every single one of my rehearsals and had a lot of notes. She really helped guide me to find the fictional Sophia, who was tricky to capture. This isn’t an autobiography, but there were things I wanted to bring to life that were important.

Britt Robertson and Charlize Theron at Netflix’s ‘Girlboss’ premiere after party (Photo: Eric Charbonneau/Invision for Netflix/AP Images)

What do you hope viewers take away from Girlboss?
I hope they’ll get a fresh take on what it’s like to be a human being. What’s special about Sophia’s story is that she was unsuccessful at a lot of things in life. She was not thriving in school, and she couldn’t get or keep a job. She had a lot of great qualities, but she sucked a lot. And she didn’t care — she dared to suck! I think that was a big lesson I learned, not to be afraid of failure. We try to be the best at what we do, being the best isn’t always the most important thing. It’s about trying and not feeling defeated when things don’t come naturally.

Girlboss premieres Friday, April 21 on Netflix.

Read more from Yahoo TV:
How Margo Martindale Became “Esteemed Character Actress Margo Martindale”
Colbert Celebrates Bill O’Reilly, While Fox News Erases Him
‘Girlboss’ Review: Ambition Gone Wild

Songs about John Mayer analysis:

“This is about, well, a guy, as usual. This was a guy that I was sort of enamored with. This song got its title by something that I just said randomly in conversation. [When] he walked out of the room, I turned to one of my friends and said, ‘It’s like watching Superman fly away.’” - Taylor Swift, Kansas City 2011

“It was at an awards show and there had been this falling-out between me and this guy, I think both of us had so much that we wanted to say, but we’re sitting six seats away from each other, just fighting this silent war of ‘I don’t care that you’re here. I remember getting home and sitting at the kitchen table, and saying to my mom, 'It was like I was standing alone in a crowded room.’ That’s when my eyes glazed over, and I got distracted and walked away to write.” She added, “My mom is used to me doing that.” - Taylor Swift on TSOU, New York Times 2011

Superman & Ours:

Superman: “He’s got his mother’s eyes, his father’s ambition,” Both John and Margaret Mayer have the same shade of brown eyes. John Mayer initially went ot college to study education - following in the footsteps of his high school principal father, Richard Mayer. 

Superman: “Something in his deep brown eyes got me seeing that he’s not all bad like his reputation and I can’t hear one single word they say.” Ours: “Seems like there’s always someone who disapproves/The verdict comes from those with nothing else to do/It’s not theirs to speculate if it’s wrong,” By the time Taylor and John Mayer became a public item he was already notorious for dating/bedding many other high profile women such as Jennifer Love-Hewit, Vanessa Carlton, Jessica Simpson, Minka Kelly, Jennifer Aniston and more - as mentioned in Dear John “My mother accused me of losing my mind”, Taylor dating John Mayer was not popular by her family’s stance as well as the medias’.

Ours: “I love the gap between your teeth/Any snide remarks from my father about your tattoos will be ignored,“ Originally this fandom dismissed Ours being about John Mayer because to state the obvious - he doesn’t have a gap between his teeth! But, upon closer inspection, between John Mayer’s two front bottom incisors there is a very noticeable gap when the photo is taken from above; something the average person would be oblivious too. Back in 2006 when Taylor’s debut album was in the process of being released, she’d joked live on air that if it sold more than 10,000 copies in the first week of sales she would get a heart (that she often Sharpie’d onto her foot anyway) permanently inked. Much to Taylor’s shock, her album sold almost 4 times that wild bet - 39,000 copies! Shortly afterwards she was prompted by the same radio presenter who asked if she was really going to get herself a tattoo, to which she responded “Yeah, I thought about it, but my dad threatened to take it off with a belt sander - so note to self, don’t get a tattoo.”

The Story Of Us, Dear John & I Knew You Were Trouble:

Superman: “He’s complicated, he’s irrational,”  TSOU: “So many walls up I can’t break through,” Dear John: “Wondering whch version of you I might get on the phone tonight,” IKYWT: “No apologies he’ll never see you cry, pretends he doesn’t know that he’s the reason why you’re drowning.” Even in the song supposedly written as a homage for John Mayer before he and Taylor were ever in a relationship, she describes his character as being very nonsensical and complex - almost foreshadowing to his manipulative behaviour recorded in the later songs.

TSOU: “A simple complication, miscommunication leads to fall out,” Dear John: “Counting my footsteps, praying the floor won’t fall through again,” Both these lyrics reference to somebody who is prone to overreacting about menial things and dishing out severe consequences - proving the “he’s not all bad like his reputation” line from Superman to be reconsidered.

Ours: “Ghosts from your past gonna jump out at me, lurking in the shadows with their lipgloss smiles,” Dear John: “I’ll look back and regret how I ignored when they said run as fast as you can,” IKYWT: “A new notch in your belt is all I’ll ever be/You never loved me or her, or anyone or anything.” During the confirmation stage of their relationship, Jennifer Aniston was interviewed on air and the topic of John Mayer and Taylor Swift was brought up - Jennifer Aniston’s automatic response was “Taylor, run girl, run.”

But possibly the most kick-to-the-gut parallel of all these supposed John Mayer tribute songs comes from the chorus to Ours and the bridge to Dear John, detailing the moment Taylor realised that the one thing she loved most was the one thing that was determind to bring her down.

Ours: “Don’t you worry your pretty little mind, people throw rocks at things that shine.”

Dear John: “I’m shining like fireworks over your sad empty town.”

Secret messages:

The Story Of Us: CMT AWARDS in referral to the infamous awkward encounter between Taylor and John Mayer when he was unexpectedly invited to perform at the CMT Awards of 2010.

Dear John: LOVED YOU FROM THE VERY FIRST DAY is an undeniable Superman reference, practically confirming these songs are about the same person.

I Knew You Were Trouble: WHEN YOU SAW ME DANCING Taylor and John Mayer met at the MET Gala 2008, where there undoubtedly would’ve been some dancing. This could also be a reference to when they first romantically hit it off, at a party or another award show.

Watch on mysilentmemory.tumblr.com

(soompi) Super Junior-M’s Zhoumi Talks About His Life, Career, and Friendships in Korea | 150803 

Super Junior-M‘s Zhoumi recently posed for a casual yet stylish photo shoot for BNTNews, as well as sat down for an interview about his life in Korea.

Zhoumi debuted as a member of Super Junior‘s Chinese sub-unit Super Junior-M in 2008, and the group most recently released their third mini-album “Swing” in 2014. Later that year, he debuted as a solo artist with his own mini-album entitled “Rewind.” He’s currently an MC on SBS MTV‘s “The Show,” and he frequently makes appearances on variety shows as well as radio shows such as KBS Cool FM‘s “Kiss the Radio.”

BNTNews says Zhoumi was bright and friendly, as well as surprisingly talkative, during their interview with the star. They had worried about his Korean level, but they found that there was absolutely no reason to be concerned. He tells them that he’s now familiar with most of the language used in everyday situations, although he adds that he has to use a translation application to help him when his doctor uses difficult words.

The magazine notes that his process of adapting to Korea was difficult because of the language barrier. Zhoumi says he ate the same food for a month because he couldn’t speak Korean. He also says he was taught when he first arrived in Korea that it was important to greet people politely, so he’d greet people he didn’t even know with a full 90-degree bow. In addition, he used a very formal and polite form of Korean, even to his close younger friends, because that’s what he learned first. He says that he still laughs about it with the guys from SHINee.

Zhoumi says that the fact that he’s now hosting a live television show in Korea surprises even himself. “But it’s been a huge help to me, because my Korean language skills have improved,” he says.

He adds that in addition to his language skills, his feelings about Korea have also changed significantly. He says that all together, including his time as anSM Entertainment trainee, he’s spent eight years living in Korea. “I feel like Korea is my second home now,” he says. “When I come back from working abroad, I feel relaxed when I get off the plane at the airport in Korea. I think ‘Ah, now I’m home.’”

After having been performing as a member of Super Junior-M since 2008, Zhoumi debuted as a solo artist in 2014. “When I put out my solo album, it was really hard to fill the stage all on my own,” he says. When asked what he remembers about his first ever solo stage, he says, “Thinking about it now, it was really the worst. It was live, but all I could think was ‘Ah, I screwed it up.’ I think when I release my next solo album, I’ll be able to do a good job, because I’ve gained so much experience from being an MC on a music show.”

When asked how he feels now that he’s being recognized in Korea, Zhoumi says that before he started solo activities, he used to always be mistaken for his label mates Kangta or Super Junior’s Siwon. “Whenever I went somewhere, people would come up to me to say hello because they thought I was Kangta,” he says. “But now they know who I am, and say they saw me on a music show or on ‘Abnormal Summit.’ The fact that it seems like they know who I am feels really great.”

Zhoumi says that he wishes that Super Junior-M could do more activities together, but he knows that everyone’s really busy. He continues, “Back when Henry and I were added, six of us all slept together in the same room in order to get to know each other. Like we were at kindergarten. In the same space, we bumped into each other, relied on each other, and got to know each other quickly. Now we know each other so well that we feel like a family instead of just friends.”

“When my album came out, they came to the network to cheer me on,” he goes on. “I was so grateful. To be honest, I don’t have a lot of Korean celebrity friends, so I’m so touched when the members come see me.”

He also says he’s friends with KARA‘s Youngji, and that he’s so close withmiss A‘s Fei and Jia that they’re practically family. When they get a craving for Chinese food, they’ll go out and eat it or cook it together. When asked who he’d like to sing a duet with, he says he’d love to release an album with Fei and Jia. He jokes that they spend so much time together, whether it’s going shopping, having a meal, or going to the movies, that it’s disrupting their love lives because none of them have time to go on dates.

Zhoumi says, “I always want to show new sides of myself, and I hope I’ll have more chances in the future to do so in Korea.”

sound check highlights: belfast

songs played
Carry On
Long Way Home

  • “team iron man or captain america?”
    michael: iron man. john got a video of robert downey jr saying happy birthday for my birthday
    ashton: so did nickelback!
    luke: iron man
    calum/ashton: captain america
  • “first song you learned to play?”
    michael: stairway to heaven but i was really bad at it
    calum: i can’t remember but it was probably a 5sos song
    ashton: i can’t remember
    luke: was it the mexican hat song?
    ashton: yes it was actually
  • “what irish instrument would you play?”
    ashton: can you name some?
    luke: one time i saw someone play a fiddle in an irish bar in portugal
  • ashton: guys i want to ask you a question. is snow patrol from here?
    fans: cheered
    luke: mixed reaction.
    ashton: do you know snow patrol?
    (he started singing a line from chasing cars)
  • “michael, would you be a pokemon? or a pokemon trainer?”
    michael: a pokemon
    luke: you didn’t ask me but i’m going to answer anyway. i’d be the pokemon trainer“what’s your favorite prince song?”
    luke: stairs
    michael: i’m a massive prince fan. one time at coachella in 2008 he asked the crowd “hey can i play this guitar?” & they shouted yes back
  • “michael what color hair do you have in your passport photo?”
    michael: i actually have 2 passports ‘cause i’m mr. worldwide
  • “are you guys gonna do signings?”
    ashton: okay, let me lay it out for you. we’re touring until
    calum: november
    ashton: yes, november. then we have to go home and see family so probably not this year but we do usually do signings for new albums or singles
  • ashton told a story about how earlier that day he and calum were walking around campus with their hoods up like drug dealers & it looked like they were selling weed
  • luke was drinking tea, in black skinny jeans & a jumper
    ashton and calum were in all black
    michael wore his black skinny jeans, bomber jacket & trucker hat
  • they seemed very happy
The Reunion (Phil)

Tonight was your high school’s ten year reunion. A few years ago, you would have never imagined that you would be going to a high school reunion, especially since Facebook allowed you to stalk pretty much anyone. But here you were getting ready for one.

You were cursing your past self as you saw the shoe box you needed at the very top of your closet. You reached for the box and grabbed the very end of it to pull it towards yourself. But, that caused another box to fall with it. You jumped backwards as both boxes hit the ground, and the mystery box’s contents scattered.

“You alright?” you heard your roommate call out to you.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you replied as the items that were in the box caught your eye.

As you bent down to see what those items were, you realized that box was full of stuff that you had never unpacked after your last move. You rifled through the contents and towards the bottom of the pile you found a small journal-like book. You opened it, and saw that there were pictures of you and Phil.


You and Phil had met during university.

It was your second year, and you were looking for a roommate. You and a good friend had planned to get an apartment off campus, but she had ditched you at the last second leaving you with a two bedroom apartment that you couldn’t afford on your own. Two weeks before you were to move in, you were frantically asking everyone if they needed a place or if they knew of someone who did. Luckily, one of your friends knew of someone who was trying to find a place, and that someone was Phil. At that point, you didn’t really care if you knew nothing about him– as long as he wasn’t a serial killer and could pay for his half of the rent, you were fine.

During the first week, you and Phil didn’t really talk too much. You went to your lectures, he went to his. But as time wore on, you both realized you had a lot in common. You both liked similar shows, liked the same music, and the two of you began to hang out together. You got to know his friends and he got to know your friends. It actually wasn’t until a couple months into living together that you had realized the two of you had gone to high school together. The school you went to was pretty large, so it wasn’t much of a shock that you didn’t know him– you didn’t know half of the people you graduated with. But, you had wished you had known him back then too as you got along really well.

Soon enough, hugs turned into cuddling, cuddling turned into kissing, and kissing ended up in cool bedsheets draped over tangled limbs.

But after three years, things began to fizzle out. He didn’t annoy you, the two of you didn’t fight, things just became kind of “eh”. You had thought it was because the two of you spent too much time together since you had lived together before your relationship even began– you didn’t really have time to miss each other. But even after sleeping separately a few times a week and seeing friends by yourselves, things hadn’t changed. You still loved him– you didn’t think you could ever stop– but neither of you could deny that there was no longer a spark.

The two of you broke up, but continued to live together for another year until you could both afford to live on your own.


You looked at the photos that were in front of you. On each page there were two photos, and underneath each of them were small anecdotes of what happened that day.

The first photo said, “Brighton 2008”. God. The two of you looked like children. You were both sat on the beach and you had your head resting on Phil’s shoulder.

We had decided to take a small trip here once exams were over for the year. During these three days, I think we ate enough food for about ten people. (Right after this photo was taken, a bird pooped on my leg.)

You laughed to yourself as you remembered Phil running into the water to try and get it off with some seaweed.  

Below the photo was on that read, “Christmas 2008.”

This photo was taken by one of Phil’s parents. The two of you were in your pajamas as you sat in front of the tree at his parent’s house on Christmas morning. You looked extremely tired since Phil had woken you up at 6am.

Our first Christmas :) If I remember correctly, it also snowed for the first time that season. (sorry for waking you up so early…)

On the next page, there was a photo titled, “New Years 2008”. You could tell the two of you were both slightly intoxicated as you kissed his cheek.

I don’t remember much of this night, to be honest. But, I think there was karaoke? Maybe?

You weren’t sure either.

The next photo was one just of you. You were sat on your bed playing an acoustic guitar that Phil had gotten you.

Your birthday
I’m really glad you enjoyed your gift :) I love hearing you play (even if you think I can’t hear you).

You flipped forward a few pages to when you and Phil had graduated university.

This is when we realized we actually had to be adults now. If you look close enough, you can see the fear in my eyes.

Under that was a photo of you sitting at a table with Monopoly.

Isle of Man
Longest. Monopoly. Game. Ever, Seriously though, it took like four hours.

“You almost ready to go?” your roommate had asked you from your doorway, which broke your concentration. You looked up at her from where you were sat on the floor.  

“What? Oh, yeah.”

You placed the book on the floor next to the spilled box and walked out of the room.


“Oh wow. How did our class afford this?” your roommate marveled as the two of you looked around the restaurant.  

It was more of a lounge than a restaurant, really. But all around there were plush sofas with low coffee tables, and you could even see a couple of modern fireplaces.

“I’m not sure, but I’m not complaining,” you replied, seeing some of your friends across the room.

You didn’t think you would ever have fun at something like this, but now that you were catching up with everyone, you were glad you came. Nobody had really changed, the lounge was awesome, and the drinks they were serving were delicious.

You were currently grabbing another drink for yourself and for your roommate. When you were walking back to your group, you accidentally bumped into someone while trying to avoid a waiter carrying a tray.

“Sorry!” you apologized as you turned to whoever you almost knocked over.

It was Phil and you smiled when you saw he was wearing his glasses for once.

“Oh. Hi,” he said in a surprised fashion.

“Hey! I haven’t seen you in ages!” you exclaimed as you hugged him.

The two of you moved to one of the sofas so you could continue the conversation without blocking people’s way.

“So what have you been up to? Conquering the world? Or do you have a large farm house with a wife, a dog, and two kids?” you asked.

He laughed. “Neither, actually. I live in London.”

“No way! That’s awesome!” You had always wanted to live there.

Phil took a sip of his drink.

“It’s pretty cool. What are you doing these days?”

“Honestly, nothing new. Still have the same job and I’m still living here.”

You two sat there for at least an hour catching up before Phil checked the time on his phone.

“Dammit! I was supposed to catch the last bus twenty minutes ago,” he paused as he began typing on his phone. “Do you think a cab can take me all the way back to my parent’s place?”

“Um, I’m not sure. You can crash at my place if you want. It’s only a few blocks from here.”

“You sure?”

“Nah, you’re right. You can fend for yourself,” you joked. “Yes, I’m sure.”


When you arrived at the apartment, you gave Phil the obligatory tour– showing him the kitchen, the lounge, the guest room, and the bathroom, while letting him know where all of the extra things were in case he needed them.

“And here’s my room. It’s a little messy,” you warned before you opened the door all the way. It was then that you realized you hadn’t put the book away and hoped that he wouldn’t notice it lying on the floor.

Phil looked around at the art on your walls as well as the little knick knacks on top of your dresser.

“Wait, is that what I think it is?” Phil asked as he looked down at the small pile of things next to your closet. Well, so much for that.

“The book? Yeah.”

“Can I?” he inquired, referring to whether or not he could look at it.


You walked into the room to pick up the book and hand it to Phil. While he was flipping through the pages, you sat down on your bed to lean against the headboard.

“We look like babies!” he exclaimed as he sat down next to you and turned back to the first page.

After a little while, you felt yourself beginning to doze off. Phil noticed this too, so he closed the book and placed it on the nightstand before getting up.

“Wait, where are you going?” you mumbled as your eyes threatened to close.

“I’m going to bed. It’s like 2am and you’re about to fall asleep.”

“Okay. Good night.”

Once he left, you figured it was probably a good idea to change out of what you wore to the reunion and into comfier pajamas. Afterwards, you laid in bed for a few minutes thinking about how much you had missed Phil now that you had seen him again. For a second, you thought about what it would be like to be in a relationship with him again. Although, you quickly pushed that thought aside as after this, you would probably go your separate ways again.

About a minute later, you heard a knock on your door.

“Hey, sorry. I left my phone in here,” Phil apologized as he quickly grabbed it off of your nightstand.

He was about to walk out of the room and close the door when you spoke.

“Wait, Phil?”

He peeked his head around the door. “Yeah?”

“Can you stay?” you asked quietly, as you patted the space on the bed next to you.

“Oh, um, sure.” He walked over to the other side of your bed, and was beginning to unbutton his shirt when he stopped. “I obviously didn’t bring any pajamas so I hope it’s alright if I just wear my boxers.”

“You’re saying that as if I’ve never slept in a bed with you before,” you laughed.


After getting undressed, he crawled into bed. Once he got comfortable, you curled up next to him and he put his arm around you.

“Can I tell you something?” he seemed to ask the dark room.

“Yeah,” you replied softly, having a hard time staying awake again.

You prepared yourself for the “this is strictly platonic and I can’t see this working out” speech. Or for him to tell you that he was currently in a relationship. But, neither of those happened.

“I really missed you,” he confessed.

You smiled to yourself as you were not expecting that at all.

“I really missed you too.”

He held you even closer once he heard your response.

A few minutes passed before Phil spoke again.

“Would you want to give us another shot?” he asked quietly.

“I think we would be stupid not to,” you mumbled before falling asleep.

Jongsuk on Cyworld

What was Jongsuk like as a teenager? 

Although we may never be able to get Jongsuk’s own Cyworld posts back, here are some of the interactions between him and fashion people. I typed these out from screencaps so that I can keep a soft copy of the dialogue; all typos are in the original text. 

Since Cyworld uses real name ID, these may shed a light on the answer – Jongsuk was a precocious, aegyo-filled bundle of cute that is loved by everyone. :D


2006.11.04 [cyworld of the director of Jongsuk’s modeling agency]

Jongsuk ah… You worked hard today… keke
Jongsuk-ie is now 18… been a model for three years… keke
The little high school kid who came to try on clothing…
This little rascal is really so cute and pretty

OO: Hahaha his face is super cute in this picture ke
Director: It’s because he was so young… ke

종석아… 오늘 수고마나쓰…ㅋㅋ
종석이는 18살… 모델경력.. 3년차.. ㅋㅋ
중3때 시장한 꼬맹이…
난 이녀석이 참 귀엽구 이쁘다

ㅇㅇ: 하하하 얼굴 대박귀엽게 나왔삼 ㅋ
 실장: 너무 어린인게지.. ㅋ


2009.03.30 [cyworld of the director again]

Lee Jong Suk: I’ll take these [photos] away~ (with the aegyo ending of 용~)
Director: You’ve worked hard… hehe See you tomorrow, Little Kid~~~

이종석: 퍼갑니다용~
실장: 수고많으섰오..ㅎㅎ 어린이 내일보자~~


2007.11.23 [cyworld of designer Kim Goo-suk]

[uploading a picture of a fashion model]

Lee Jong Suk: Juwon-ssi.. this person is also from MJ [Modeling Agency]…
Hwang Jin-ah: Jongsuk is revealing the name of others…
Yang Hee Myeon*: Ah it’s Kim Juwon… Actually I saw him at Eleven.. Only remembered when Jjong** mentioned him

* Yang Hee Myeon is the manager of a modeling agency, now head manager.
** Jjong (쫑) is their nickname for Jongsuk.

주원씨 이분도 mj출신이라지
황진아: 종석이 이름알려주고 당기네…
양희면: 김주원이네.. 사실 일레쁜 때 봤는데.. 쫑댐에 기억났어 ㅋ


2007.11.23 [cyworld of designer Kim Goo-suk]

[uploading a picture of another fashion model] 

Lee Jong Suk: It’s Jinsuk-hyung-ah*~  This person is also from MJ keke
Yang Hee Myeon: Heol~ MJ……. kekeke
Hwang Jin-ah: He’s MJ also…….. hehehehe
Yang Hee Myeon: But MJ’s walking is really good keke
Hwang Jin-ah: Jongsuk-ie is also from MJ……..
Yang Hee Myeon: That’s what I mean, ke

*횽아 (hyung-ah) is an aegyo term for hyung

이종석: 진석횽아다. 이분도 mj 출신이라지 ㅋㅋ
양희면: 헐~ mj……. ㅋㅋㅋ
황진아: 그놈의 mj……ㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎ
양희면: 근대 mj 워킹 거의다 잘해 ㅋㅋ
황진아: 종석이도 mj출신이니까……
양희면: 그러거지 ㅋ


2008.03.19 [cyworld of Ko Tae Yong, designer of Behind Closet]

[KTY posts a picture of Jongsuk’s back on runway]

Lee Jong Suk: Ah, cute, kekekekekekeke Director Ko
Ko Tae Yong: Next season, please don’t be so naughty okay…

*Jongsuk with Ko Tae Yong

이종석: 아 귀엽소. ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ 고싱장님
고태용: 담시즌에는 제발 말썽치우지망기를..


2008.04.30 [cyworld of Yang Hee Myeon]

[posts photo of Jongsuk walking 2008 F/W collection]

Caption: Jjong-ah walked for the first time in some time, did so well

Baek Jin-hee: But he gained some weight in the face… keke
Yang Hee Myeon: Even so, he’s beautiful ke
Hwang Jin-ah: What are you guys saying, his face has become so small

오랜만에 쫑아 워킹했네 잘했어
백진희: 하지만 자꾸 살찐다는거…ㅋㅋ
양희면: 글애도 이뻐 ㅋ
황진아: 얼굴 작아져써 왜그래


2008.05.01 [cyworld of Yang Hee Myeon]

Caption: Hong-chan and Jjong-ah… Pretty same-age friends

Hong Jong Hyun: This kid is insane
Yang Hee Myeon: kekekekekekeke

홍장 과 쫑아
이뿐 동갑내기 친구
홍종현: 얜 병신
양희면: ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ


2008.10.29 [cyworld of Ko Tae Yong]

Hwang Jin-ah: Ah Jongsuk is so cute
Ko Tae Yong: Since I see Jongsuk every day, it is easy to momentarily forget how precious Jongsuk is; but through this show I felt Jongsuk’s presence once again
Director Park: Ahh!! This cutie pie

황진아: 아 종석이 귀엽다 ㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎ
고태용: 종석이를 매일봐서 종석이의 소종함을 잠시 잊었지만 이번쇼를 다시 종석이의 존대를 느낄수 있었지
박희장: 앗!!! 귀엽동이


2009.01.06 [cyworld of Kim Chan]

(They are playing a prank on Kim Chan, asking him to guess who they are.)

[Am I a fan?]: Chanie-hyung, shall we play a game of ‘one card’-forehead hitting? keke
Kim Chan: Is this Jongsuk… but you are too polite to be him
Seon-yul: It could either be Jongsuk or Insoo
Jung Insoo: Why am I mixed up in this, I’ve never played 'one card’-forehead hitting with Chanie-hyung -__-
Lee Jong Suk: Why am I mixed up in this, I HAVE played 'one card’-forehead hitting with Chanie-hyung -__-
Kim Jin Young: It’s me kekekeke lol
Kim Jin Young: Lee Jong Suk can’t win against me in 'one card’.
Jang Suk Jae: Are you guys terrorizing the comments section?
Kim Chan: Get over here you punks, I will hit all of your foreheads

*Kim Chan, who was a model and now is the owner of brand Chancechance

팬일까요?: 원카드 마빡 대리기 한판 할래여 찬이형? ㅋㅋ
김찬: 종석이지너.. 근대말투가너무 착한대
선율: 종석인가 언수인가 그것이 문제로다
정인수: 뭐만하면나래 난 찬이형하고 원카드마빡때리기 한척없는대 -_-
이종석: 뭐만하면나래 난 찬이형하고 원카드마빡때리기 한척있는대 -_-
김진영: 난대 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ 나참
김진영: 이종석은 원카드 나한대 안됨.
장석재: 얘네 댓글데러하는거임?
김찬: 싹다덤벼이마다뚤어줄게


2009.02.04 [cyworld of Kim Chan]

[uploads a picture of himself looking rather old fashioned, Jongsuk and friends proceed to make fun of him]

Lee Jong Suk: I didn’t know H.O.T has reunited?
Seon-yul: Looks like Moon Hee Jun to me
Kim Pil Soo: Lee Jong Suk, what is that attitude you have for a hyung, you should tell Chanie he looks like Sechskies*

* Sechskies is also an old band, so not much better
* Kim Pil Soo was a model, 87-er

이종석: H.O.T 부활한거임?
선율: 아무리도 문희준같음
김필수: 이종석 너 형한데 그게 무슨발버릇이야. 젝키로해줘 찬이


2009.03.27 [cyworld of Ko Tae Yong]

Kim Pil Soo: Ah, Director! The clothes are so pretty T_T
Lee Jong Suk: How about me? keke
Kim Pil Soo: Jjong. You are simply the best, why are you even asking, so frustrating

김필수: 아 역시 쌤!! 옷이쁘다 ㅠㅠ
이종석: 나 어때? 낄낄
김필수: 쫑. 너 그냥 최고야, 뭘물어바, 짜쯩나게


I hope that wasn’t too messy. Just found it cute how everyone calls him Jjong and dotes on him like a child.


When I heard my very first Taylor Swift song I was eleven years old at my dad’s house. I remember it was early in the morning (around eight) and I was watching CMT music videos while my dad was making breakfast. The music video for Tim McGraw started playing on TV and I had no idea who this girl with curly blonde hair and cowboy boots was but I did know that I liked the song I was listening to. I liked it so much that on the way home I begged my dad to stop at Walmart and get me her CD before I was dropped off at my mom’s house. So he did, and the rest is kind of history.

A couple years later in August of 2008 my mom got me tickets to see Taylor because she was opening for Rascal Flatts. I was over the moon once I found that out. My friend and I made shirts for the occasion. Out of outrageous luck, five minutes before we’re supposed to leave for the show, my mom told me that I was going to meet her. Now that was really something else. I’ll never forget that day. I’ll never forget how Taylor’s face lit up and the first thing she mentioned was loving my shirt. I’ll never forget the way I had to literally look up to her and say my name so she could sign my shirt. And I’ll never forget how I was about to walk off so other people could meet her but she surprised me with one last hug.

Since that day I’ve seen her six more times. I saw Taylor perform outside of Soldier Field for a country music festival in October of 2008, I’ve seen her open for Keith Urban in June of 2009 in Moline. I saw her in October of 2009 for the Fearless tour. I saw her two days in a row for the Speak Now tour in August of 2011 (one of these days I met soitsgonnabeforever for the first time and that ruled), and I saw her for the Red tour April of 2013 in Indianapolis. These days will always have a special place in my memory and definitely in my heart.

A week before 1989 came out Miss Taylor liked a photo of mine, I cut out little pieces of paper and wrote “Buy 1989 on 10/27”. I snuck those messages into random books at Barnes & Noble (because let’s be real, everyone should own a copy of 1989). In the beginning of December, Taylor liked one of my selfies (shout out to usedtobemadslove for being incredible and reblogging the selfie in the first place, Taylor probably wouldn’t have seen it if it wasn’t for you). #RIPME

taylorswift thank you for these amazing seven (going on eight) years. I started listening to your music when I was eleven years old and now I’m nineteen. Thank you for always being yourself and creating music that has helped me and so many other people. Thank you for being there when no one else was at times. Thank you for introducing me to the most incredible people from so many different places. I am so happy and immensely grateful to call them my friends (one of them is actually my girlfriend. She’s very cute and loves you so so so much). 

Taylor…I could go on and thank you for many more things, but that could get real cheesy real quick so I’ll just stop here. I’ll see you at Soldier Field in July, okay? I’m looking forward to it.

Always on your side.

 ~ Rebecca 

Let's Talk Consideration At VidCon

So, this is my first year at VidCon and while I’m having a freaking amazing time meeting new people and creators and just generally lolling around, there are some things I would really like to say.

Security at VidCon do not want to upset you or make you miss out on getting a picture with people. Do you think they’d want to mess with 10,000 excited teenagers? No. They’re doing everything they can for YOUR protection and the protection of the creators you’re meeting. Please be respectful of the security and coordinators because they are trying to help you.

What I saw at the signing hall this morning was not respectful, calm or as simple as it should have been, and I feel terrible for the VidCon coordinators that had to take the blame for it even though it was the very inconsiderate crowd that complained and pushed and shoved and were just very rude and not nice. Everytime a security guard walked over, people would push and shove to get the guards to notice them so they could get through to the actual signing lines. Then when an officer said, “I can’t do anything about it”/“I can’t let you in”, people would complain and whine and say how terrible that officer is and how terrible everything is. 

Unfortunately, I was in the middle of this mob. 

I also got to watch Tyler Oakley walk through the signing hall and then being chased by fans who left their photo/signing lines to run to him. And even people from the mob. Like, he was just trying to get through quickly and easy so he could make it somewhere in time.

While it is true that the lines probably could have been dealt with better and that security shouldn’t have let anyone in or lined up UNTIL an hour prior to the start of signings, the fault was ours.

After a guard said, “okay a few people can come up into this line” about a hundred people flooded towards that and it got out of control. I had to leave. I could not physically be there anymore as I was embarrassed, literally unable to breathe and just incredibly appalled at how inconsiderate everyone was being. I didn’t expect everyone to be calm and courteous, but I was almost shoved to the ground and pushed over and pulled back by these people. This is when I decided to leave because now my anxiety was getting ridiculously bad and I wasn’t able to breathe or move.

So after exiting the expo hall, I then witnessed Finn Harries being mobbed and followed and screamed at by so many people. He was obviously in a hurry and had his bodyguards around him but people still ran to him and pushed eachother just to get a photo or even a glimpse. The fact he even needs a bodyguard is saying something. I understand Finn Harries was literally sculpted by the Greek Gods and is so handsome and charming and basically Prince Charming, but he is a human. Two minutes later, Hannah Hart was rushing to the mainstage and I waved to her and she smiled and was just a lovely lady, but there were about 15 girls trying to get photos with her while she was in a hurry and I happened to be a little too close and then got pushed over. 

VidCon is meant to bring us together as a community and enables us to learn more about creating good content as well as meeting the super cool people that inspired us all. But it’s only going to be like that if we remember that safety is important and that we need to respect other people.

I’m upset I didn’t get a photo with Charlie McDonnell. He was the first YouTuber I watched in 2008 or something and he is just a genuinely good creator and probably a very nice person. However, even if the opportunity to take a picture with him arises but I’ll have to push and shove my way to it, I won’t do it. Charlie is very cool(like), but what’s cooler is remembering everyone wants to get a photo and an autograph and being mindful of that. I understand you want pictures and photographic evidence of BEING IN THE PRESENCE OF SUCH COOL PEOPLE, but please, I implore you to be thoughtful of the people around you and to the cool people themselves.

Obviously not everyone is like that and it’s a very small minority but it does affect it for the rest of us trying to enjoy the small time here.

Other than that, VidCon is pretty rad and you should definitely try and go next year.


Another year went by, taylorswift, another year in which you made us all feel special, gave us strength and supported us. So, just a few Swifties from all around the world want to tell you what you mean to them .. because you make our life unique, you helped us being fearless, you are always there when no one else is. You don’t know all of us, but I hope you know what you do to us, every day, even if it’s just a smile of you we see on candids .. 

I asked a few Swifties from all over the world to write a short text and send me  a photo of them to show oyu how much they love you, this is the result .. (it’s in order with the photos!)

Anita: Happy 26th birthday, Taylor. Thank you for showing me how to shake mean people off!

Charlotte ( fallinswift): Happy birthday, you beautiful girl. You’ve changed my life completely .. in a good way! I Love you so much, forever on your side ♥

Eunice: Happy Birthday, Taylor! I just wanna thank you for being the light in my darkest days and for saving my life, literally!

Eva ( evakate13 ): Dear Taylor, I made this heart for the Red Tour in Berlin on february 7th. It was the best day of my life! May your 26th birthday be as beautiful and perfect as that day was for me! You’ve been my biggest inspiration and role model for more than 6 years now. I am so grateful for how my life has turned out because of that. Happy Birthday, I love you forever & always!

Renske ( dresseduphipster): Dear Taylor, I wanna wish you a Happy 26th Birthday! I have been a Swiftie since the beginning of the Speak Now Era. Your music has helped me through a lot of rough periods & I wanna thank you for that! June 21st, 2015 is the first time I saw you live! I still can’t believe it! Also, I wanna thank you for introducing me to the most wonderful Swifties in the world. November 30th a lot of Dutch Swiftes had a post-1989-release-party & it was the best!

Olivia ( longlivethemagicwemadetayy): I adore you, crazy, gorgeous, wonderful, lovely and pretttiest person on this planet! I’m in love with your smile, your eyes, your voice, your laugh and every other little thing about you. I have never loved anyone as much as I love you. I just can’t explain what you’ve done to me! Every time you smile, I smile with you. Even the words “I love you to the moon and back” aren’t enough to tell you how much you mean to me. My love for you is endless. I will NEVER leave you, one day I’ll tell you this in person. Happy Birthday ♥

Anna ( ohhsoswiftly): HAPPY 26TH BIRTHDAY, TAYLOR! I love you so much, we all do!! And I want to take some time to tell you you are seriously the reason I am happy. I am so proud of you, Beautiful! If one day I get to tell you face to face how much I love you and how you have always been there for me then it’ll be more than worth it! I owe so much to you because you have simply done so much for me! I’m forever on your side! 

Karly ( swifts-polaroid): Happy birthday! I hope all joy and happiness is brought your way today, much love. 

Irysha ( swiftireckless): Happy 26th birthday, Taylor. May your days always be blessed. Stay perfect, queen! 

Alishia ( thexyswift13): Happy Birthday Tay! You’ve made my world this incredible place it is now for the past 8 years & I am so proud of you!! Love you forever!!

Guelsemin ( xlovedyouso): Dear Taylor, I just wanna thank you for all the things you’ve done for us! and for being my idole, making me smile and your wonderful music with the beautiful lyrics! I love you so much, have a nice birthday!!

Ann (twitter: grxndesfearless): Hello Taylor, happy birthday! I am so grateful to have you. I love you so much, I believe one day I will meet you and tell you this in person!

Mellissa ( @fiftayreasoms): Hey Taylor, Happy Birthday! Just wanted to say that I saw you for the first time Oct 2nd. It was be my first concert and I was fifteen! 

@InLoveWith_Tay (twitter): 26? Seriously? I can’t believe the girl who loved dressing up like a princess just turned 26! Taylor, I know you since 2008. I remember the day perfectly when I discovered you! This year you look older, and you have changed, but for the better! You look so happy and that makes my life! I will never have enough words to tell you how much I love you. You’ve completely changed my life and I am so grateful! You are like a best friend to me! My heart is yours!

Charlotte ( tswiftvancity): The rest of the world was black & white, but my love for you is in SCREAMING color! Happy Birthday, Taylor! I love you so much, you’re my everything!

Lena ( fangirl-too-much-97): Taylor, have the happiest birthday you can ever have! I’m so proud of all you’ve reached! You are everything to me and I can never thank you enough!

Lisa (me): Hey Taylor, I have started this project for you just to show you how much people, Swifties, from all over the world love you. I hope today will be the best day ever for you. Stay fearless, enjoy your life and never forget that the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate! Thank you for everything you have done for me the past 7 years, hopefully I’ll be able to tell you this in person one day. But for now. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 

Taylor, nothing can describe my love for you. You have changed my life. I can’t remember what my life was like when you weren’t in it. I became a Swiftie in 2008. It started when my sister gave me her copy of “Taylor Swift” and I fell in love. I would always sing the songs (you liked a video of me singing Teardrops on my Guitar when I was 5) and I would fall asleep to Our Song every night on repeat because it was the only thing that could help me sleep. I went to the Fearless Tour when I was 6 years old. It was my first ever concert and it was AMAZING!! Our seats weren’t very great but you went to the back of the arena to sing Hey Stephen and you were right next to us!! My dad and I tried to get a little closer. You looked right at us and smiled at me. I smiled back and blew you a kiss! It was awesome. I still have that tour shirt and wear it all the time! When Speak Now came out, my mom got me the album for my birthday. We would always play it while we cleaned my room. Sadly, you didn’t come to Wichita for the Speak Now Tour, so I missed out on that. When your next album Red came out I fell in love. (again) I really loved I Knew You Were Trouble. It was so much different than anything you had ever done. Tickets for the tour went on sale. I begged and begged and BEGGED my mom and dad to get me tickets. They said no. I was SO devastated. For my 10th birthday, I opened my present from my grandpa. AND I GOT TICKETS TO THE RED TOUR. I freaked out! When I went to the concert I was so excited I could barely pay attention to Ed. When he started to sing his last song I literally fell out of my seat. When you started to play State Of Grace I screamed at the top of my lungs. When you sang Sparks Fly (which was my favorite song at the time) you were really close to us and then you pointed at me, we made eye contact, you blew me a kiss, and I died. By the end of the concert we waited outside for a while to see if you would come out. We realized Club Red was going on so we left. Me and my sister had a sleepover in her room and wore our tour shirts to bed. We read tweets and looked at Club Red pictures for that night. During that summer I decided to make a FanAccount. We have been waiting so long for the next album and then the day came. The Yahoo LiveStream. 1989. Shake It Off. AKA pure gold. The day of the iHeart Radio music festival Daisy made a book of letters and I was in there. All the sudden at 2:12 am I get on my phone and scroll through my notifications. There I saw “taylorswift left a comment on your photo” AND I DIED. DEAD. I couldn’t wait to hear the rest of the album, I already started to plan my tour outfit. Then October 27th came. I went to buy 1989 dressed up in merchandise, dancing, freaking out, taking pictures, and getting weird stares. (I gave them a glare like “you have no idea what you are missing out on”) I went home and immediately listened to the album. I immediately fell in love with Wildest Dreams and Blank Space. For my 12th birthday my mom got me and my best friend tickets to see you. When I saw them I burst into tears. I couldn’t wait. The account that had your comment got deleted. So, I made a new account (@alltheswifthings on IG) Anyways, my best friend (@swiftwalmart on IG) and I are going to see you in Kansas City on September 21st (43 FREAKING DAYS) We have our hearts set on Loft ‘89 but trying not to get our hopes up. Sending a hug to you from Kansas! Ashlyn. taylorswift

Once in a Lifetime: Chapter 2

Once in a Lifetime: A Harry Styles AU Imagine Series


A/N: Please remember that this fanfic goes back and forth between past and present, please mind the dates!

A reader requested I make a soundtrack, so I will pair a song to each chapter!

Chapter 2: A Necklace & A Journal

Skinny Love (Cover) by Gavin Mikhail 

*photo edit is mine

August 2008: Holmes Chapel

It had been exactly one month since Harry first kissed me and since then we’ve shared a few kisses here and there.

We never really talked about what we were to each other since nothing really changed except that after we hung out Harry would always kiss me ‘goodbye’ before he left. 

So I assumed that we were just still best friends, that kissed. I didn’t want to be the first one to bring it up so I hoped that Harry would eventually.

My parents had finally come home from being gone for months for business, they found Harry studying with me in my room and my dad threw a fit.

“Boys should not be allowed in your bedroom Y/N!” My dad bellowed as Harry packed his school work up.

“Dad! I’ve known him since we were five! Are you serious?! How many times have you met him already?” I shook my head.

“I don’t care, Y/N. If he respects me and your mother, he would be in the living room or the library,” My father scowled at us as we went downstairs.

“Are you-”

“Your dad’s right Y/N… I shouldn’t be in your room like that,” Harry held me back and then turned to my dad, “I’m sorry sir, you’re right, I won’t be going into her room anymore.”

“You guys aren’t even home half of the year so what does it matter?” I shot back at my dad.

“Harry, I think you should leave so I can speak to my daughter.” My dad held the door open for Harry.

“See you at school tomorrow, call me if you need to talk.” Harry tugged his right backpack strap over his right shoulder and quickly hugged me.

“Have a good evening sir.” He nodded at my dad then left.

My dad slammed the door shut, “I do not want you around that boy!”

“Why? Why not? He’s been in my life for NINE years already!” I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Drop that attitude young lady AND I don’t care! He isn’t good enough for you!” He shouted.

“I’m the one that’s not good enough for him!” I shouted back then turned on my heel and ran upstairs.

Harry’s and Gemma’s relationship with Anne is what I dreamed to have with my parents. My parents were gone half the year, traveling for business. I understood that they work hard to give me the best but they were never the type to just call me and ask how I was doing or how I’m feeling, it was always about school. I was at the top of my class, always have been and on top of that they hired private tutors for after school to teach me different languages and about the cultures of the world.

My dad was all about tough love, maybe it’s the reason why I had a hard time expressing my feelings. 

My mother and I… we had our moments, but I felt like to her, being my dad’s wife was more important than being my mother. 

- - - - -

April 2020: New York City (Present Day)

Your POV

After two weeks of helping Liam plan the perfect proposal for Sophia, all of our closest friends, Louis, Eleanor, Katherine and Andy waited for Sophia and Liam to finally show up so that we could all record Liam’s proposal.

Liam wanted to take her dinner at her favorite restaurant then back to where they had their first date, which was in a park with a rose garden in Manhattan. All of us had set up candles and drizzled rose petals all along the walk away from the entrance of the garden all the way to the middle where there was a fountain, in front of where they shared their first kiss.

We hid at different parts of the garden, so that we could capture the moment at all angles.

“Guys! He just texted me saying he pulled up to the park! Get in positions!” I whispered then everyone scrambled off with their phones, except Andy, he had a professional Nikon DSLR.

Andy was Liam’s closest guy friend. They had met during undergrad, three years before Liam and I reconnected in medical school. He had the duty of recording everything with a camera since he was a professional sports photographer.

Liam was nervous, he had called me freaking out on the way to pick up Sophia, so I knew that he was probably shaking and sweating.

“I CAN’T STOP SHAKING Y/N!” He shouted into the phone.

“LIAM! Breathe!” I laughed and put him on speaker as Eleanor and I picked up the rose petals from the florists.

“INHALE… EXHALE…” Eleanor grabbed my phone.

“I’m TRYING! I’m sweating bullets! Jesus Christ, I’m going to screw this all up!” He panicked.

“Liam. You’re a world-renowned sports medicine doctor. You deal with men over 6 ft and 300 lb. and you’re telling me you’re scared of this 100 lb. woman?”

“YES!! BECAUSE SHE’S EVERYTHING TO ME!!!” He yelled through the phone.

“BREATHE. YOU CAN DO THIS. She loves you too! I promise you, even if you completely botch your proposal, she’s going to say yes.”

“Well gee thanks. I gotta go! I’m outside her condo! I’ll text you when we’re on the way to the park!” He quickly said then hung up.

I saw Liam and Sophia walking hand-in-hand and hit record on my phone.

“What is all this? Liam? Did you do this?” Sophia looked around at the candles that were set up around the fountain.

“I- yes.” He blushed.

Sophia let go of his hand and took a step up on the base of the fountain to look down at the candles to see it making a giant heart around Liam.

“Oh my god!” Sophia’s hand came to her mouth as she saw Liam pulled something out of his pocket and kneel down.

The minute Liam started, I heard him choking back tears and then I started crying as I watched my oldest friend surrender his heart to the love of his life. I tugged on the little heart on my necklace, remembering how it felt to be in love with someone so deeply.

I watched Sophia step down from the fountain and stand in front of Liam as tears fell down her face.

“Sophia Smith, I have been in love with you since the day I first met you… and there is no one in this world that brings me more happiness and joy in my life than you.” He took a deep breathe, “I want to spend everyday, for the rest of my life, waking up next to your beautiful face and making you as happy as you make me. Will you do me the honor of being my wife?”

“Yes! Yes! A thousands times yes!” She shouted and cried as she pulled Liam up from his knees.

Liam slipped the ring on her finger and wrapped his arms around her, “I love you so much Sophia,” then kissed her.

We all started clapping and hollering and stepped out of the bushes.

“Oh my god! No! You guys all knew?!” She buried her face in Liam’s chest, “No stop recording me, I’m crying please!” She laughed.

“No way Soph, this moment is flawless.” Eleanor squealed as she held up her phone.

“SOPHIAM FOREVER!” Louis shouted as he threw his arm around Eleanor.

“I’m so happy for you two!!!” Katherine hugged Sophia and cried with her as she looked at the ring on her finger.

Katherine was Sophia’s closest friend from designer school and work. She had joined our little group not too long after Liam and Sophia started dating.

“Congratulations Liam! How are you feeling man?” Andy zoomed the camera in on Liam.

Liam wiped the tears from his eyes, “I feel like the luckiest man alive.” 

And then he kissed Sophia again.

That same evening: New York City

Harry’s POV 

“Hey Harry! Almost closed?” I looked up to see my best friend, Niall, in a business suit, walk into my bakery.

“Yeah, just give me a few more minutes to run through these numbers.” I nodded.

“Do you have any more of my favorite cupcakes?” He asked as he leaned over the counter on his elbows.

“You know I always make extra for you.” I bent over and grabbed the box from under the counter and handed it to him.

“Oh my god, you’re the best. These are so addicting, I hate you.” He grabbed the box.

“Then give them back if you hate me!” I tried to grab the turquoise container from his hands.

“Nope, sorry, all mine.” He turned around, opened up the box and took a cupcake out, stuffing it whole into his mouth.

“Damn Ni! Chew! You’re going to choke!” I patted the back of his shoulder.

“If I die, I will die a happy man, because these cupcakes are to die for.” He mumbled with crumbs falling out of his mouth.

“Okay, you’re disgusting, you better clean all that up,” I pointed at the floor with my pen.

It’s been exactly a month since I’ve opened ‘His & Hers Bakery’ in New York and it has been busy since day one, all thanks to Niall.

Niall and I became friends while I was in my second year of culinary school. He was studying International Business and we both met at a small pub and bonded over the fact that we grew up not too far from each other. Even though he was Irish, his family had moved to the UK when he was about 10.

After Niall graduated with his Bachelor’s, he went to the States for his Masters and began investing in businesses around the world, he became quite wealthy, even more than he already was. As for me, after I graduated my first culinary school, I moved to the States with Niall. I was accepted into another program in Illinos, which I attended during the day, and at night I worked as a pastry chef under a great chef in Chicago at the Alinea, one the best restaurants in the world.

After a year of that, Niall insisted that I open up my own bakery, saying that I was ‘way too good to work underneath anyone.’ Niall invested in me by loaning me money. He gave me a crash course in how to run a business, promoted my bakery and help me hire a crew and build my dream bakery, hence ‘His & Hers Bakery’ was born.

“I really don’t know why I’m not fat yet, mate.” Niall said as he took a second cupcake out of the box.

“Honestly? I don’t know why you’re not either,” I chuckled as I reviewed the orders for tomorrow.

“Do you know how amazing these tastes? God this is why I invested in you from the beginning, I knew New Yorkers wouldn’t be able resist your crack-cakes.”

“Crack-cakes? Really?” I folded the binder and put my leather journal on top of it and locked them up in the safe under the cash register.

“Yeah my college mate Louis said that’s what his girlfriend calls them.” Niall continued to talk with his mouth full.

“You’re still disgusting, clean up and come on,” I pulled off my white chef hat and ran my fingers through my hair, “Let’s go grab a drink, I need one.” 

When I was younger, I use to be obsessed with making cupcakes because of my grandma. Before she passed away, I made a promise to her that I wouldn’t let her recipes be forgotten. I started expanding my skills; I found out that I enjoyed cooking, making cakes, baking bread, and well pretty much making all sorts of desserts. But cupcakes were always my favorite to make, especially because they were Y/N’s favorite.

I missed her more than anything.

It’s been ten years since I’ve seen her yet she’s never left my mind.

I wonder how she’s doing or where she is. I hope she’s happy.

I felt my heart drop a bit but then smiled to myself as I locked up and followed Niall down to our favorite bar in New York.

I thought back to why I named the bakery ‘His & Hers Bakery,’ in the first place. 

When I was younger, guys at school always teased me for baking and designing cupcakes, calling me ‘gay’ and a ‘fag’ but I just tried to ignore them.

One day she got so mad that she shoved the school bully to the ground, took a cupcake of mine and shoved it into his mouth, “CUPCAKES ARE FOR EVERYONE! NOT JUST GIRLS YOU IDIOT!!!”

That was my best friend for you.

From that day on, he and all of his friends stopped calling me names. Actually, they apologized to me the next day and asked me to make them cupcakes.

I missed her. 

God, I miss her.

- - - - 

December 2008: London, UK

Harry’s POV

I worked my ass off for the last six months to save up money for Christmas presents. I even missed a few days of school so that I could work at the bakery. Gemma came home for winter break and helped me find something for our mum, but what I really needed help was with finding my best friend a gift.

Y/N came from a wealthy family and I knew that not just any present would do. She said she isn’t the materialistic type, but I’ve seen her house, her closet, her collection of handbags and shoes. I wanted to get her something to show her how much she meant to me.

“So where are we going next?” Gemma asked me as we walked through the mall in London; we both took a train from Cheshire so that we could do all of our Christmas shopping today. 

“I need to get Y/N something.” My eyes moved from store to store, trying to figure out what exactly I wanted to get her.

“Oh, okay… what did you have in mind?” 

“I don’t know… something that she can wear, like a necklace or something.” I muttered.

“A neckace? What? Wait.” Gemma held her hand up and stopped me in the middle of mall, “Did something happen between you two?”

“What do you mean?” I kept turning my head around, seeing if there was a jewelry store anywhere.

“Between you and Y/N? Oh my god, I am right aren’t I? You’re in love with her!” Gemma exclaimed as she hit me on the shoulder.

“Ouch!” I rubbed the place where she hit me, “What was that for?”

“I’m right, aren’t I?” She grinned.

And that was when I saw it, the perfect necklace. It was simple, it was silver and it had a tiny heart in the middle that was connected by two chains. I completely ignored and walked away from Gemma as I followed my gaze of the necklace.

“Harry!” She followed closely behind.

“That one, I want to get her that necklace, it’s perfect for her.” I pointed and the jewelry came up to us and pulled it out for us to look at.

“Harry… this is really expensive.” Gemma looked at the price tag.

“I don’t care. I worked my ass off and I want to get her something nice.” I pressed my lips together.

I pulled out my debit card that my mum helped me applied for and handed it to the jewelry.

“Are you sure young man?” He looked at me up and down, thinking I wouldn’t be able to afford it.

“I’m positive,” I nodded.

That next week Y/N came over to spend Christmas Eve with my family, like she has been doing every year since I’ve met her. After dinner, we sat around the tree opening presents.

She bought my mum and Gemma each a new purse which basically sent them into tears. They’ve always wanted a designer bag and Y/N had been saving up her weekly allowance from her father to spoil my mum and Gem.

“Y/N! No, I cannot accept this from you! Please sweetheart, return this.” My mom hugged her.

“NO WAY! This is your Christmas present, if you don’t want it, I’ll just give it to Gem,” She chuckled.

“Yeah mum, I’ll take it if you don’t want it.” Gem admired her purse.

I just shook my head at them, girls. I will never understand.

“I should get going, my parents expect me home tonight.” She stood up and grabbed the dresses and scarves my mum and Gem had gave her.

“I’ll walk you home.” I stood up and grabbed my coat, which held her Christmas present in its pocket.

“Yeah let me just grab my stuff from your room.” She smiled.

As I walked home, I laced my hand in hers and we talked about her going on vacation with her family for New Years, which they do every year and every year they went to a different country or big city.

“Where are you going this time?”

“Boston! I’m so excited! I get to visit my dream school!” She grinned.

“Wait, your vacation is going to consist of a college visit?” I looked at her as if she was from another planet.

“HEY! Wipe that stupid look off your face! You know I want to go to Harvard.” She pouted.

“Yeah but you know you’re going to get in, you’re the smartest person in this town.” I shrugged.

“Yeah but still… They only accept the best-” She looked at me.

“And the richest, which you are, so no problem,” I stuck my tongue out at her.

“But I don’t want to get accepted because my parents have money, I want to earn their acceptance purely through academics.”

“You will. I know you will Y/N.” 

I stopped her before we approached her house and pulled the little square box out of my pocket and placed it in her hand, “Merry Christmas Y/N.”

“Harry! You didn’t have to get me anything!” She gasped.

“Oh shut up. Open up.” I nudged her.

She slowly opened the gift wrap at each end, not wanting to tear the wrapping paper then pulled out the black velvet box that was underneath it.

She slowly opened the box and her eyes widened as the necklace came into view.

“Harry… this is beautiful.” She looked up at me with tears in her eyes.

“Yeah? You like it?” I took the necklace in my fingers and out of the box, “Turn around.”

She pulled her hair back to the side of her neck and I quickly clasped it.

“I love it!” She threw her arms around me and kissed my cheek.

I turned my face towards her and lightly kissed her lips.

“I know we haven’t talked about it, but I really do like you Y/N… I-I” I stammered.

“I know Harry, I know.” She smiled, she always knew exactly what I was thinking.

I walked her to her door and before she went inside her house, I pulled her in for another kiss.

“I feel bad Harry…” She said as she pulled away.

“What, why?” I raised an eyebrow at her.

“Because I didn’t get you a present!” She frowned.

“Oh! No! No! I don’t care-” I shook my heard.

“Yeah right, you actually think I wouldn’t? It’s in your room.” She kissed me on the cheek then turned around and opened her door.

“You little-”

“Goodnight Harry,” She winked and slowly closed the door.

I put my foot in between the door and the door frame, “Wait, does this mean you’re my girlfriend now?”

She started giggling then pushed me out and closed the door.

“I’ll take as a yes! Have a good Christmas! I’ll see you soon!” I shouted and then made my way home.

When I finally got in my room, I saw the rectangular box that was sitting on my bed. I closed my door, immediately grabbed the gift and ripped off all the paper.

It was a red leather bound journal. I opened it up to see that the inside of the cover had a note and was signed.

I heard you were a big fan of my pastries and aspire to be a pastry chef as well. I wish you all the luck. Y/N tells me that your cupcakes are better than mine and I hope to try yours one day. All the luck to you, don’t give up on your dreams.
Duff Goldman

“No fucking way…” I exhaled. She got the guy who owns Charm City Cakes on Ace of Cakes to sign this book! What the fuck!

The page next to it had her handwriting on it, I would recognize it anywhere.

Merry Christmas Harry!
This journal is for you to write down all your grandmother’s recipes for safe keeping and for you to create your very own recipes. I know you’re going to be an amazing pastry chef one day, I believe in you.
All the love
Your best friend

- - - - -

April 2020: New York City (Present Day: same evening from earlier)

Your POV

After a night out with the group, celebrating Liam’s and Sophia’s engagement, I finally headed back to my condo around 3 in the morning, knowing I was going to dread work tomorrow.

I quietly opened the door and kicked off my heels, carrying it across my wooden floors so that I wouldn’t make a lot of noise. I was kind of drunk.

After I finished changing out of my dress and into my soft pajamas, I climbed into my king size bed and set my alarm for 7am on my phone.

“Hi baby, how was it?” My boyfriend yawned and pulled me into his arms. He stayed here when he could; he’s been working a lot so I’ve only seen him once or twice a week the last few months. He lived in Chelsea, the art district of Manhattan, while I lived on the Upper East Side of Manhattan.

“I’m sorry, did I wake you up…?” I wrapped my arms around him and laid my head on his chest.

“No, not really, I couldn’t sleep without you here.” He kissed the top of my head and rubbed my arm.

“It was so cute! I cried so much! I’m so happy for Liam, he is such a great guy and Sophia is so perfect for him.” I kissed his bare tattooed chest.

“Did you have fun at the bar after?”

“Yeah… I drank a little too much wine… I’m a bit drunk.” I traced his tattoos with my finger tips.

“I know you are, go to sleep baby, you have to wake up in a few hours.”

He tilted my chin up and sweetly kissed me, “Goodnight, Y/N.”

“Goodnight, Zayn.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -


Please let me know what you think! I absolutely am having so much fun writing this imagine fanfic! I love it! 

Please, let me know what you think! I know it can get a little confusing but I promise it will stop after a few more chapters!

<3 M

Dear Taylor Alison Swift,

There isn’t a big chance that you’ll see this because I’m just one fan in a billion who adores you, but I want that little possibility of you actually reading this to be there. I should probably tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Carly, I am Australian and I am a huge fan of yours and have been since 2008, I can’t exactly remember the first song of yours I heard but I know that I got Fearless as a present and the one song that really stood out for me was love story. I instantly looked you up and I saw that you had a self-titled album and I begged mum to go back to the store and get that one as well, and of course I thought it was absolutely amazing. I remember for my 13th birthday me and my sister got tickets to go see you in concert at your speak now world tour in Brisbane, the seats weren’t that good because they were near the back but the concert was absolutely amazing and I will remember it for the rest of my life. I remember wearing your concert t-shirt that I bought at the merchandise store and I wrote a 13 on my hand. When you started singing love story I was so emotional. Love Story is my absolute favorite song. I also went to your RED tour in Brisbane as well, I wasn’t originally going to go because it was too expensive but I was lucky enough to win 2 sets of tickets! The seats were at the back (again) but I still had the time of my life. My sister (Kaitlyn) and I made a poster that says loving you is RED and made 2 shirts with my best friend Jessica but since she couldn’t come to the concert I brought my sister with me, we made those things because I heard that you had this thing were your mum goes into the crowd and chooses some lucky fans to get better seats or to even get to meet you! But sadly I wasn’t lucky enough. I also wrote some lyrics to love story on my arm and I had red face paint on, I went all out at this concert. I have never gotten the opportunity to meet or get noticed by you but I will keep trying my hardest and do everything I possibly can because my life will not be complete until I get the chance to meet you. I would really love to go to the 1989 world tour but I won’t get the opportunity to go unless I win tickets and I’ve been to two of your concerts already so my dad will say no. But anyway, I am so glad that I get to have you to look up to because you’re such a good person with good morals and you’re so nice to everyone and you have let your fans into your life so much as well as trying to be a part of their lives! I love how your songs are so relatable, I’m the quiet girl in school who sits at the back of the classroom and doesn’t say much, I’m starting to break slowly away from that because of you and knowing that you kind of went through that as well gives me comfort. I am also very worried because I’m in grade 11 and I still have no idea what I want to do in my life and I have no idea who I want to be, all I know is that I want to do something extraordinary, and when I wake up in the morning I want to think, wow, that was a great choice. Listening to your song fifteen gives me a sense that everything will be ok and that it is ok not to have everything figured out yet. I just want to take a second to congratulate you on the album 1989, it is so good, and I love how in the CD case there are 13 Polaroid’s, I think of it as a little present for the swifties who have been here from the start, it’s like saying thank you for being with me for all these years and for the new swifties its saying welcome to the family. It is so amazing how you invited fans to your house, which was so kind of you and that would have been the highlight of their life. There is a phenomenal amount of trust that you share with your swifties and I love that because you know that without them you wouldn’t be where you are today. I love it how you have changed but you’ve changed for the better and you are still the same Taylor you were a couple of years ago, it’s just you’ve matured and you’ve grown from your mistakes and have learnt new things. It’s really great that you have been interacting with fans online because it makes them believe that you really do care about them, even though you can’t get around to every single person, you try your best to acknowledge everyone and make them feel so special even if it is just by liking their photo on Instagram. It’s my 16th birthday on February the 5th and I am super excited. It would mean everything to me if you said happy birthday to me. One last thing, Thank you for being such an inspiration to me and even though you aren’t here with me, you always will be through your songs.

I will continue being a swiftie for years and years to come and that’s a promise.

-Love Carly ♥

P.s. Sorry this was so long, I basically just wrote a whole essay, haha.


#ConcernedStudent1950: How protest started, spread, rocked Missouri
Grad student Jonathan Butler was prepared to die to bring change to Missouri. With help from the football team, he lived to see his hunger strike succeed. Here's how it happened.

COLUMBIA, Mo. – He penned his will on an autumn day, his 25-year-old life summed up by his three most coveted possessions. Jonathan Butler had a laptop, a stack of books and a backpack. He bequeathed each of the items to his friends.

Butler had spent more than a quarter of his life as a student at the University of Missouri, a Midwestern campus with a student population that is 77 percent white. And deep inside, he was reaching his breaking point. He’d been called the N-word, had his health benefits cut and witnessed overt acts of discrimination throughout the campus. Those acts seemed to escalate in the year since the Ferguson riots.

Every stand Butler tried to take yielded few, if any, results. On Oct. 10, Butler and his activist group Concerned Student 1950 staged a protest at the homecoming parade, blocking the convertible that carried Tim Wolfe, president of the Missouri university system. The driver revved his engine, and Wolfe eventually rode away without addressing the protesters’ concerns. (Wolfe later met with the group, but didn’t agree to any of their demands.)

Feeling frustrated, Butler, in an interview Tuesday with ESPN.com, said he started reading up on the hunger strikes staged by Cesar Chavez and Dick Gregory. He saw how they helped impact change and decided to embark on one himself. Butler, a graduate student, was convinced Missouri would do nothing and ultimately he would die.

He held off on telling his friends about the hunger strike because he knew they would worry. Butler is the type of guy who gets something in his head and doesn’t back down. When he was in high school, he was an unimpressive offensive lineman who had one final year to make varsity. So what did he do? He trained all summer, transformed his 5-foot-8 body into a rock-solid 240-pound beast and helped lead his Omaha Central High School team to a Nebraska state championship.

The situation at Missouri also motivated and consumed Butler. “For me,” he said, “it was like, ‘What else do I have to do to prove to you that I’m a human? That as a constituent of this university that I deserve to be heard and deserve to be respected?’”

Butler composed a letter to the Missouri board of curators, the school’s governing body, vowing that he would not consume food or nutritional sustenance until Wolfe was removed from office. It was Nov. 2, and a campus was about to be turned upside down.

Monday, Nov. 2

At 3 a.m., Butler knows he can’t put off the news any longer. He tells the members of Concerned Student 1950, a name derived from the first year black students were admitted to Missouri, that his hunger strike will start in six hours, and that he will call for the president’s ouster. But why Tim Wolfe? He had only been president since 2012 and wasn’t exactly perceived as a villain around campus. One person who knows Butler later wonders whether he’s taking a page from the book “Rules for Radicals,” which implores the reader to go after people and not institutions. “People,” the book notes, “hurt faster than institutions.”

Butler will later say that he hasn’t read the book. He doesn’t know Wolfe, who is 57, a former IBM executive and white. He demands Wolfe’s removal because Butler believes he was tone deaf in responding to the concerns of marginalized students. Butler compares Wolfe to an athletic director of a major football program. If the team struggles and keeps losing, the coach is at fault, and the athletic director is to blame, too.

Wolfe’s inaction during the homecoming parade may have been a catalyst, but several incidents on campus led up to that moment. In September, student body president Payton Head was walking down the street when a truck full of young people yelled the N-word at him. A few weeks later, members of the Legion of Black Collegians (the official black student government at Missouri) had racial slurs hurled at them. Then late last month, a swastika drawn in feces was found in a residence hall on campus.

When Butler announces his strike, members of Concerned Student 1950 want to do something to draw more attention to his plight: The more supporters and the more media, they figure, the better the chance they have for the school administration to act.

His friends spend $75 on a tent to pitch in the grass at Carnahan Quadrangle, near the student recreation center. They fill the tent with water and granola bars and other supplies. Six students sleep in the tent the first night.

“We have a chance to be an inconvenience to the university,” Marshall Allen would say later, explaining the group’s strategy. “Because being out there on the quad, we’re inconveniencing their public relations. To have people and visitors come through and see us camped out, you’re going to have to engage us to figure out why we’re camped out there.”

Allen serves as security guard that first night. He snores and keeps everyone up. Butler does not stay at the camp. He wants to keep his strength up.

The group, which has 11 original members, is very protective of each other to the point of almost being combative. It creates an interesting tug-of-war between wanting their message to get out to the public and carrying an enormous distrust for the media. Signs are placed in the grass ordering reporters and outsiders to stay away.

A member of Concerned Student 1950 later says that one of the reasons they put up the signs is to keep people from taking pictures of them when they’re crying.

“One of the biggest things I learned this week is to have faith,” she says. “Just to have faith and believe that whatever you believe in will come to fruition. We kept working, but we had those moments where we were like, 'You know what? Let me go cry, and then I’m going to go back and start working again.’ I prayed more this week than I probably prayed this entire semester.”

Wednesday, Nov. 4

The number of tents has grown. Concerned Student 1950 has been holding nightly prayer vigils, and more students are joining in. Butler spends part of the day at the camp. He is greeted by former Missouri All-American defensive end Michael Sam, who made news last year when he publicly came out as being gay.

Sam brings Butler some water. Though he says he never experienced racism in his time as a player at Mizzou, Sam feels compelled to stop by and lend his support for Butler.

J'Mon Moore, a sophomore wide receiver for the Tigers, also visits Butler. Moore later tells reporters that he was driving by the quad, spotted the tents and wanted to learn more. He meets Butler, goes home and talks to his roommate, safety Anthony Sherrils, and then they consult with senior captain Ian Simon and defensive end Charles Harris.

Word starts to spread throughout the team, and it surprises Butler. He didn’t know any of the football players before last week, aside from watching them on TV.

By Wednesday, the effects of the hunger strike are starting to take their toll on Butler’s body. He will eventually become weak, lethargic and short of breath.

Back in Omaha, Butler’s old coach at Central reads on the Internet that a Jonathan Butler is staging a hunger strike. Jay Ball turns to his assistant coaches and asks, “Is that our Jonathan Butler?” They find a photo of the man in Missouri and learn that, yes, it is their J.B.

Ball isn’t surprised that Butler has staged the hunger strike. “This guy has some serious mental toughness,” Ball said. “I saw it when he was 17 years old.”

Friday, Nov. 6

There are now roughly 20 tents in the quad, and hundreds of people are stopping by to lend their support. Syed Ejaz, who is running for Missouri Student Association president, decides to camp out for a night. He is accompanied by members of his campaign staff. It is three days from the start of the election.

The ground is wet from Thursday night’s downpour, and the temperature drops to 38 degrees. Wind whips through the campsite. To pass the time, the group plays a game called Two Truths and a Lie. The students sit in a circle, introduce themselves and say three things about themselves. The others figure out which one is a lie. They wrap themselves in blankets and huddle close together, black and white.

Ejaz is uncomfortable in the cold, but he calls the night inspiring. He feels as if he is part of something bigger.

“This has been bubbling for a long time,” Ejaz later says. “I think what Jonathan is doing is heroic, it’s brave, it’s inspiring. It’s very courageous. And the fact that he’s effectively putting his life on the line for this … it’s very powerful.”

Saturday, Nov. 7

A group of black football players meets Butler at a location on campus that he declines to disclose. He can’t remember everything that happened that day. He says he was in an exhaustive state. He can’t recall his emotions or reactions to things.

He thinks there were about 30 football players at the meeting. They had heard about the hunger strike and want to know why he is doing it. He gives them his story. He tells them he has encountered racism since arriving on campus in 2008. He talks about his acquaintance Sasha Menu Courey, a biracial former Mizzou swimmer who, according to a 2014 ESPN investigation, was allegedly sexually assaulted by one or more Missouri football players in 2010 and took her own life a year later.

Butler talks about mental-health and academic services and his wish that everyone were treated equally and received the same care. By the end of the conversation, the players are so moved they tell Butler they are going to stage a walkout.

Butler shakes their hands. Some of them pray together. He has no idea what kind of an impact the meeting will have.

One of the players calls Tigers coach Gary Pinkel to inform him of their plan.

That night, Sherrils tweets a statement that is also sent out by the Legion of Black Collegians that says athletes of color on the team “will no longer participate in any football related activities until President Tim Wolfe resigns or is removed due to his negligence toward marginalized students’ experiences.”

Sunday, Nov. 8

By midnight, Missouri’s 4-5 football team is the biggest story in the country. News outlets swoop into Columbia, and Butler’s phone is ringing nonstop.

On Sunday morning, Pinkel sends out a tweet. “The Mizzou Family stands as one,” it states. “We are united. We are behind our players.”

The school releases a statement that the team won’t practice until Butler ends his hunger strike. As reporters arrive on campus Sunday night, members of Concerned Student 1950 get nervous. They tell them to keep their distance. At 10 p.m., at least 100 students gather in a circle for prayer. A man in the center shouts, “Do not talk to the media!”

Monday, Nov. 9

Eric Wichmann, a senior studying information technology, is up until 1:30 in the morning studying for class. But by 9 a.m., he discovers that his classes probably won’t be held. Students and faculty are staging a walkout, and the gathering in the quad mushrooms into a mass of humanity.

Mallory Scanlan, a business management major, is standing by Wichmann and taking in the swarm of people. Scanlan agrees with Butler that changes need to happen at Missouri. Last week, she was in the student center eating lunch when a group of black students stormed in carrying bullhorns. They blocked the exits, she says, and demanded that the students listen to them.

She said one man approached her, looked at her Macbook and her clothing and barked, “White privilege,” to her. Scanlon teared up. She is at Mizzou on a biracial scholarship.

“It’s sad to say that it gets this big because the football team did it,” she says. “But because they did it, our school came together, and that’s the only good thing that’s come out of this so far. Our school has come together as one.”

Wichmann tells Scanlan that he’s all for people expressing their opinion, but he doesn’t understand what good getting rid of the president will do. Will the person they hire next do any better? Can Wolfe be held responsible for the actions and opinions of 35,000 students?

Within the hour, Wichmann’s concerns don’t matter. At around 10 a.m., Wolfe announces his resignation at a meeting of the school’s governing board in a cramped conference room inside the Old Alumni Center, not far from the football complex. Wolfe makes his announcement right after the meeting is called to order and before the board members go into closed session.

Toward the end of his announcement, Wolfe mentions his daughter, and his voice starts to break. He says she pointed out a biblical passage to him the night before, Psalm 46:1. He reads that passage and punctuates his remarks with this: “Please use my resignation to heal, not to hate.”

With Wolfe still in attendance, the board members go into closed session for more than six hours. By the end of the day, chancellor R. Bowen Loftin is out, too. “I sincerely wish it was different, but events are such that the best course of action for the university at this time is for me to resign,” Loftin says in a release from the UM system. He is reassigned to a new role overseeing renovation of the school’s research facilities.

Back at the quad, the students fill the grass and chant and sing. Members of Concerned Student 1950 grab bullhorns. Hundreds of students form a massive circle to keep the media away.

Butler emerges for a few minutes to join in the celebration. Then he goes to the hospital to get checked. His hunger strike is over after a week. His first meal, he later says, is an IV.

Butler’s hunger strike was over, but tents remained up at the site of the protest on Monday night.

A news conference for the football team scheduled for 3:30 p.m. starts 15 minutes late. When Pinkel finally emerges, he says his motivations were simple. He wanted a young man to eat and to live.

“I knew from the jump that Coach Pinkel was going to support us,” wide receiver Moore tells reporters afterward. “Coach Pinkel supports his players. We’re all his sons. I didn’t have a doubt in my mind that he was going to stand against us. There’s no way he would have done that.”

The protesters leave their tents up in the quad. They plan to stay there for another night. They want to celebrate.

Tuesday, Nov. 10

The football team does not want to talk about its boycott anymore. The players slip back into their fall routine and get ready for a Saturday game against BYU.

One of the team’s leaders declines to talk via text. He says the players decided as a team not to do interviews. He says they want to give the protesters the biggest platform so their voices can be heard.

For once in his life, everyone wants to hear what Butler has to say. It’s an unusual position for a man who was known as quiet and humble during his high school days. Butler grew up not wanting for anything. His father is an executive at Union Pacific; his mother helped found Joy of Life Ministries in Omaha. They were in Columbia on Monday to take care of their son, and whisked him away from the crowds in a white Mercedes.

“The football team stepping in. … If that wouldn’t have happened, the school truly wouldn’t have responded until after I passed.”

But by Tuesday morning, his parents are gone, and Butler is flanked by members of his group. He emerges from a car around 5 a.m. The hospital bracelet he was wearing the day before is no longer visible, and he’s bundled in a coat. He is hesitant to do interviews, but he knows he needs to get his message out.

When this whole thing started, Butler never imagined that one 25-year-old grad student could stop an entire college football team, albeit for a couple of days, or put fear in the minds of college administrators.

Butler said he was prepared to die. Whether a college football team saved him may never be known.

“I know how corrupt the system is, and I know how much they don’t value black lives,” he says.

“The football team stepping in. … If that wouldn’t have happened, the school truly wouldn’t have responded until after I passed.”

Butler walks to his car as the sun rises. By the end of the day, the university will announce the appointment of an interim vice chancellor for inclusion, diversity and equity. Chuck Henson will begin work immediately, the university says. But by nighttime, there are threats of violence toward black students on social media and more tension. Butler has no plans of backing down.

“We need to look at what’s next,” he says. “It’s more than Tim Wolfe.

"So much has to happen on campus.”

ESPN’s Nicole Noren and John Barr contributed to this report.

A much more believable source on Mizzou than Clay Travis’s pathetic excuse of “journalism.”

h/t: Elizabeth Merrill at ESPN.com 

[Goo Hara’s 23th Birthday Project] 140131 - Hara's quotes

I always think that the current time is important and i will always enjoy every single moment of my life as hard as i can.
[Crea-star May 2012 issue]

“Let’s start running with a smile”, that’s my favorite motto. Smiling through the times you’re tired and giving your best at work.
[121121 - R no Housoku]

My fans are my treasures ♡
[Dream Paper Vol.2 – July 2013 issue]

I become strong and get more confident when the five of us standing on stage together as KARA.
[Beauty+ September 2012 issue]

I often look at my photos that have been taken from previous activities. “I was like this at that time…” I could smile just by recalling all those happy moments. I appreciated all of those memories and kept reminding myself that: “Do not be sad. You are a happy kid because you have all the fans who have been loving and supporting you in such a way until now.”

The more albums we have released, the more burdened I felt. But since I have my members to rely on and to believe in, I could get over it.
[Elle April 2013 issue]

Staying on time is very important. If i think I might run about 5 minutes late, I will call first to inform. Not only me, but also all of our members, we always stay on time. During 5 years with KARA, manager oppa were late sometimes but we never came late. One for all. Because if i come late, the others have to wait.
[Cosmopolitan August 2013 issue]

I always want to help people in need in this world such as elders who live alone or unfortunate children regularly. Therefore I am going to join whenever I get an offer to do anything that would allow me to help people.

When I see a lot of fans that takes their precious time to go to see us at the concert, that is when I feel happiest. I feel like I am receiving so much love. I am so happy that I get goose bumps all over my body when I see the large stadium filled up completely.
[Elle December 2013 issue]

Lately, when people asked me what was my happiness, I answered that it was when I had tour in Japan and was able to see you guys. KARASIA has been that eternally happy memories to me. Thank you so much, for always coming to make this time become the time that I would never have the second time, that I could never forget.
[KARASIA in Kobe]

I am so grateful and thankful for having you guys to always support us and smile as well as cry together.
[140104 - Hara’s message to Miracle]

If having a small body frame were a complex, I wouldn’t even try to work this hard. Instead, I always think of it as a motivation for me to take a better care of myself and to work harder to fill my lacks. I don’t want to blame my weak condition whenever I get sick

In this 2014, I will show you not only KARA’s Goo Hara but also a different Goo Hara. I don’t want to say “Please keep supporting me” but I wish you would look forward to a more hard-working Goo Hara. I hope you would still remember the Goo Hara that you have known and also would be watching a fresh changing Goo Hara.
[The Celebrity January 2014 issue]

I do not follow what are not suitable to me even when people ask me to do so.

Although I am still lacking but I will grow up step by step by myself. I want to be a person whose eyes are full of effort.

I arrange what I am lacking by ranking them from 1 to 3 and am dividing my time to fulfill them in order to not waste time.

Now I am taking time to be mentally free as well as free in time. Time is very precious.

It was a year that I felt so grateful to my fans when we had Tokyo Dome concert and Arena Tour. Although we had so many overseas activities but our Korean fans were always waiting patiently until the day we came back. I really appreciated that people were waiting for us. I also appreciated the eternal heat that I could feel when I was on stage. And when I saw our fans, I could feel “They indeed loved us wholeheartedly.” It was overwhelming.

Everything has finished well today and I am going to work hard tomorrow too.

I need to learn more and be more hard working. In my own world, I will never be self-satisfied. Even if I get better latter, I will still keep trying harder.

Lately, no matter what it is, I am still preparing for 3 or 4 days in advance and work to keep that plan.

There were a lot of things that have happened after since my debut in 2008. We want to always give you happiness but we have also given you many sadness. Thank you so much for overcoming everything and still being by my side until now. Thank you! I cannot describe my feeling in word but I have nothing else beside this grateful heart to give to you. I hope that you will keep watching over me, because I am confident to not ever make you regret.
[Ceci February 2014 issue]

© haradaily.tumblr.com

All Images are from Google or Richard’s twitter, I’m too lazy and so not emotionally prepared to wave through all his tag finding the movable version for any of this, I’d probably have a heart attack before I manage to finish this post.

I PROFOUNDLY APOLOGISED! That this post is ridiculously long and full with tons of images…

Day 7: A Favourite Personal Look

Seriously, how can anyone answer this question? I sure can’t. I mean, I basically don’t give that much attention to his looks, he’s an actor; he has to change his appearance all the time to keep things look realistic. Besides, I’m no Fashionista myself, when someone asks me about his/her style, I usually response that he/she looks fine the way she/he is! It isn’t a lie, my head really is working like that.

And oh my, Richard does look absolutely gorgeous in every style he’s managed to be. Well, I have to say maybe not his ‘90′s Backstreet Boys’ one in Between the sheets.

Yeah…probably not this one…

But apart from that, Totally fine, damn.

I’m usually all for man in suits, you know, all nicely dressed and gentlemanly but Richard with cardigan and waistcoat really does make my heart leap. It makes him look approachable and kinda of, I don’t know, warm somehow.

Suits? Oh yes, Definitely yes. though for me, I love him more in black; black has always been my favourite colour, I don’t know it has certain quality like bringing out a sort of mystery and sophisticated, enticing atmosphere some how.

But of course, His casual looks is not bad at all. I kinyda like this side of him actually; I remember reading an interview way back like in 2008 or something where he gave an interview in causal clothes, and then went to change for the photo, lol. The man has almost absolute no-sense about dressing himself; I think perhaps he’s just too lazy and doesn’t like to be bothered with it. When shooting Spooks, he talked about how he would hit the gym after shooting, went home and crashed on the bed, waking up in the morning, putting on the clothes that he had just picked up from the floor because he didn’t have the time to send it for cleaning before going out for the shoot of that day. Yeah, totally hopeless.

Dark and dirty, clad in leather?

Need you ask?

As for his facial hair… I don’t know but clean-shaven Richard always gives the sense of incredibly young and it looks so oddly unfamiliar, so for me I don’t particular in favour of it though I wouldn’t object. (My friend said that Richard looks old and odd-looking but when she saw his picture as Lee in Cold Feet, she literally pointed out at the screen; shouting out right that he’s handsome.)

I think we could agree that Richard with a little bit of stubble, like with those 5 o’clock shadow is the most frequent looks we’ve seen him it. And it works fantastically. I think there even a research saying that women are more likely to attract to a slightly-beard man rather than  a clean-shaven or full-beard one. But for Richard, it sure add up more to his charm; giving the vibe of someone who is a bit sinister; like bad-boy attractive especially when he dyed his hair black…

The beard? 

Oh, no doubt. I think the man likes his beard. In one interview he expressed concern at first about having a beard while doing a Photo-shoot but much to his surprise, it turned up to look good. (His exact word would be okay but I think we can push it to good, no?) For me, he looks a bit more mature and, I don’t know intimidating? because only when he got a full beard on had I realised that he is indeed a big man and my, watching the Crucible really gives me a glimpse of how he would be when he’s angry.

You know someone once made a point that Richard’s selfies on Twitter look like a compilation of Hot Dad taking selfies, my friend said that she had agreed with that (I would never ever call Richard “Daddy” but oh well…) I don’t know, I love that looks as well. I mean, how can you not?

Hair colour? I would say Black does indeed compliment his eyes making them much more prominent and boy, what a nice pair of eyes…

But when his real colour is showing, it looks kinda nice too.

Or like this…

Hell, I should probably stop now…Okay, I’m gonna stop now…