i really start to hate my life

plain-jane-miss  asked:

TBH when I first started reading this Scott was my favorite and like...I sort of hated Seong??? Like I thought he was a jealous annoying brat, but then I got to know him more and appreciate him and he is def my favorite now. I want him to be happy, I want him to be loved, this presh boy is my life now. Save me :'''D

AHmm Thank you!! I’m glad you really like Seong now!! To be honest this is the kinda reaction I was trying to get out of readers, because this is the exactly how other characters in the story react to him too!

Seong seems unlikable at first, but once you get to know him you can see where he’s coming from and he becomes a far more lovable character. 

That awkward feeling when you’re helping a customer at the counter and they start asking if your nails are natural and then commenting how much they like a girl with long nails.

Yes mine are a little on the long side. No I really didn’t need to know that. And I’m only being nice to you because I’m supposed to as part of my fucking job. Ugh.

Express your feelings Saeran
  • Saeran, softly: I think you’re a really great, kind and considerate person and I'm glad to have you in my life and-
  • MC: What?
  • Saeran, loudly: NOTHING. I SAID I HATE YOU.

I didn’t really know what to say last night but I’ve never been good at keeping quiet and I’m not about to start now

To put it plainly, I’m devastated

Never in my life has my faith in humanity and my country been so tested

I knew there was a lot of hate and fear in this country but I genuinely believed that the empathy we all should feel for our fellow humans would be stronger than the fear and hate-mongering that has plagued this election

How can people honestly believe that spreading and supporting such hate and cruelty does anything to further our country and the world
How can people support someone who has no respect for anyone but himself
Who wants millions of Americans like myself either dead or gone from this country
(Or at the very least just some subservient wallflower that exists purely for his enjoyment)

Last night I watched the results come in while skyping with my friend Klaudia @elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey as we’ve done for every major event in this election and I cannot begin to describe the absolute horror and fear that continues to grip us as we come to terms with the result of this election
I was crying so hard I couldn’t breathe and as the tears kept coming so did the realization of everything that could happen over the next 4 years
Of the rights that will be violated
Of the Supreme Court justices that will sit for life and could overturn decades of civil rights progress
Of the Executive Orders that are almost inevitable
Of the culture of virulent hate that this man has brought out in our country

Last night I received over 200 messages from people saying how scared and angry and upset they are about this election and it’s outcome
How they’re afraid for their lives and the lives of their loved ones
How they feel like this country doesn’t love them
How could it do this to them?

I’ve never been afraid of someone becoming president
There were people that I didn’t want to see become president but I knew if they won we would make it through the next 4 years and the country would be okay
Multiple suicide hotlines froze last night because too many people tried to call in
The Canadian immigration website crashed for too much traffic
People shouldn’t fear for their lives or want to die just because of an election

America the Beautiful showed just how ugly it could be last night
It showed that it doesn’t really care about women
About POC
About LGBTQ people
About the physically and mentally disabled
It just cares about the straight white Christian men that it’s always cared about since the very beginning of this country

America has elected someone so unbelievably unqualified for the Presidency because people couldn’t accept that a woman was more qualified to lead

Hillary Rodham Clinton was quite possibly the most qualified presidential candidate in the history of this country and she lost to a man who can’t string together coherent sentences and sexually assaults women for the hell of it because people honestly thought a woman’s mismanaged emails were worse than committing sexual assault and wanting to round up 10 million Americans just because of their faith

People don’t like powerful women and Hillary wasn’t afraid of being a woman in charge and that annoyed people more than anything so don’t let anyone say that her loss had nothing to do with her being a woman because that would be the biggest lie of this whole election

My faith in America has been greatly wounded
I thought that we as a country and as a world we’re moving towards being better people
I don’t understand how wanting to revert to the past could possibly make for a better future
America will keep moving forward but how far will we move back before then

As terrified as I am of the next 4 years I’m not going down without a fight
We all need to remember our humanity and be brave
We need to stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves
We need to be a voice for the voiceless
We need for Donald Trump to know that his hate filled fear mongering will not be taken lying down

America is strong
And we’re all stronger together
So have courage and be kind
We’re going to need it

Good God, we’re going to need it

10

* Can you believe it’s been a year since I started this blog, and what a life-changing year that was for me.

* As mentioned above, I first sketched this comic way back in March, on a really bad mental health day - a kind of day that I would be going through on an uncomfortably regular basis at the time. However due to the rise of this blog’s popularity, and growth of my fanbase, I can honestly say that I have had the best year of my life. I never received any hate mail. I never got into any arguments. All that you, my followers, have ever given me, was the kind of mass support I’ve NEVER known online until now.

* This comic was, obviously, made with Papyrus in mind, and how he helped me face my issues, but today, fully finished, it’s for all of you as well. For your support, for giving me something I can look forward to every day I check the internet, for all the encouraging words, for caring for my health, for all the beautiful fan art, for the lovely people that I met.

* Undertale, Papyrus, and this blog have changed my life in ways I never thought possible, and for this I want to sincerely thank you.

* So here’s hoping to another year of silly comics and good vibes!

* Nyehfully yours,

* -Jim

Poussey Washington: Had hard life, poc, still remained amazing and kind, life started getting better, murdered.

Glenn Rhee: Had hard life, poc, still remained amazing and kind, life started getting better, murdered.

Wes Gibbons: Had hard life, poc, still remained amazing and kind, life started getting better, murdered. 

I’m really hating this pattern.

anonymous asked:

So I donated to your kickstarter so long ago that I can't even remember when it was and you haven't been making updates about the progress of the album in a very long time. I know life happens and sometimes things get pushed back but I'm starting to wonder where my money went and if I will ever get the vinyl I paid for. It's been well over a year and it's making me think you just took everyone's money and don't really care how long they have to wait to see what they paid for come to life.

this mite be a long post! please for the love of god feel free to scroll beyond if u dont care, i truly hate when people fuck up my feed with their essays so ya. that is my disclaimer here. ok.

ok. deep breath.
i talk about this/my campaign/my project VERY often on twitter (it’s distracting and often harmful for me to use tumblr and facebook regularly. sorry if that’s inconvenient). i realize most people aren’t actively checking my shit & that my tweets get buried in the constant avalanche of my stupid thoughts, so i’ll summarize the past year or so. hopefully whoever left this anonymous message will check back to see the answer and if so, i IMPLORE u to read the entire thing instead of picking out details from the first 4 sentences and sending me another message about how i stole your fucking money.

my album is almost finished. i’ve said this multiple times over the course of the past year, but this time it’s like, legitimately fact. i’m feeling extra sensitive right now and reading this message felt like stepping on a rusty nail, so i’ll go ahead and give you as many details as possible to explain why it’s taken me over a year to complete my first full-length album. 

i am an independent artist, as you probably know. i am also an extreme perfectionist. when i began my kickstarter campaign in september of 2015, i had about 30 songs written that i’d poorly recorded in my shitty apartment, many of which i hoped to record professionally for my first proper (and physical) release. i could not fucking stand the thought of being contractually obligated to make music via label and figured kickstarter was my last hope. i honestly thought it would fail miserably and decided that when my campaign came to a humiliating end, i’d move on from music and do something else that wouldn’t make me feel so fucking horrible about myself. somehow, thanks to you and everyone else who made my dream come true, i made enough money to actually make a record.

two months later in january of 2016, i went home to florida from LA to visit my family for the holidays. thanks to my incredible fucking luck, some kind of crime ring was hitting licks on every major airline’s baggage claim at LAX post-holiday and my luggage containing 3 notebooks filled with all of my lyrics, 2 external hard drives and a bunch of little USB drives containing 2 years of my work were stolen. hmu if u want the police report for proof. 

i lost a lot of work (and learned the value of The Cloud- i hate to trust it after my nudes were leaked and my fucking whole bank account was emptied after someone hacked my shit in 2014, but here we are) and basically all morale but pieced together what i could from what i had left. i hired a producer i’ve admired for years to be the executive producer of my record and decided this fucking bullshit was an opportunity to make my shit better. due to unfortunate, unforgivable and honestly criminal circumstances, this fucking psycho wasted an upsetting amount of my time and decided to back out of my project. THAT particular situation keeps me up at night and i fucking live for the day i can tell that goddamn story, it truly shocks me that a human being could do me like that fool did me, yall will find out one day but ahem. anyway. 

after this incredible fucking scam, i decided to ONCE AGAIN start anew considering the legal and financial obligations of releasing music that had been co-written by this bad fucking person. i left my home in LA and went to stay at my dad’s house in florida, spent literally all of my time mastering production software and learning to play piano, and filled in all the shit i’d lost with new things i’d written and produced entirely on my own. then i got married, but that’s unimportant to this story. actually it is like, kind of important, but whatever.

i was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in january 2016 and in march of 2016 i attempted suicide. i left an organized folder of songs, mockups for art, my bank account info and a note to my manager to make sure that my album was released because i literally could not comfortably die knowing that i let down the people who gave me money. im not tryna make anyone feel bad im just like saying cuz its part of the whole shit. anyway, i failed at killing myself and woke up in a bathtub of puke ready to go the fuck off. haven’t wanted to die since.

ahem. so. since i’m honestly 100% unable to trust a single fucking human being with my work and my thoughts after what happened up there ^^^^, i decided to set up a room in my new home for recording. i wrote, recorded, and produced (with some help, but like please bitch give me credit here) a fucking entire new album that i actually LIKED. im not shy about the fact that i think my music is stupid gimmicky- after trying to die and not dying and then getting help i realize i have like a little bit of talent i should actually appreciate. i finished recording and producing it, hired a person i trusted with a degree in music production to help me polish it and alas, he ran off without a single fucking word. thankfully i didn’t pay him a cent but like hey there u follow me on twitter and FUCK. YOU.

so now, as of about a month ago, i’ve absolutely perfected my songs (as much as i can- i still lose sleep over the imperfections im just not good enough to fix) and i’ve found the most trustworthy, hardworking team i’ve ever met to finish this shit. it’s demoralizing to recap the past year, mostly bc it was so fucking horrible for me, but i can promise you the last thing i would ever ever ever ever do is take a bunch of money and dip out with it. i do literally every single piece of this shit on my own, from the music to visuals to branding, and it’s hard. it’s time consuming. i have a job outside of music to provide for myself and for my family, and that takes up my time too. 

so i really apologize for the amount of time it’s taken for this record to be released. it fucking kills me to be waiting and i didn’t spend your money; god knows i would never in my fucking life just STEAL your money. the fact that anyone would ever accuse me of that makes me ILL.

i just want ya’ll to know there’s nothing easy about releasing music as an independent artist, especially one who refuses to accept anything less than perfection, and ESPECIALLY one who refuses to be disrespected and taken advantage of. i’m doing my best, and it took me a while. i feel like it’s worth it. it’ll be another 2 months or so. hit me up if you want a refund on your vinyl.

A Little Something Nice

I really don’t like my fast food job. I hate dealing with strangers, smiling all day while repeating the same questions wears me out, my job is completely worthless to society, has taught me no useful life skills, and I’m easily replaceable. 

I didn’t think I was going to be able to get much for anyone for Christmas this year, since I’m pregnant and my husband is a student and we both work in food service. But since the holiday season started, more customers have been tipping (it’s fast food, so there’s no expectation to tip), and it’s really added up. I’m now able to make/buy a little something for my close family and friends, plus we don’t have to sweat over the gas money to drive up and see my parents! 

I complain about customers a lot, and I really do dislike my job, but I have to admit I really appreciate the generosity of these strangers, it’s really made a difference for us this year. Happy holidays ^.^

Wow. Just seriously. This. Is amazing? Like, when I started roleplaying as the precious goddess known as Lunafreya, I didn’t expect to be greeted and so welcomed as I was. I feel so honored? Like. I’ve forever been in a fandom where it’s filled with negativity and hate but gosh.. This fandom, this beautiful place I’m so pleased to be a part of, made my life so much more peaceful and renewed my love and passion for roleplaying.

And it’s thanks to you guys! c: To those I’ve met, who’ve cheered me up and made me smile, laugh behind this screen. That despite it all, you make sure everyone’s smiling and I’m blessed to be a part of it.~ I’ll try my very best to not make this long but I wish to say my thanks to you guys. I seriously cherish you all in my heart and look forward for what the next year brings for us! 

Keep reading

first off, let’s get some shit straight. i hate waking up. i fucking hate it. at any given moment in my life, there is a 93% chance that i would rather be asleep. that being said, becoming an early riser when i started graduate school was the best thing i’ve ever done for myself and for my productivity. so an alternate title for this post could be 

HOW TO TRICK YOUR BODY INTO GETTING VERTICAL AND STAYING THAT WAY AT AN HONESTLY UNREASONABLE HOUR.

  1. put your alarm someplace far, far away from your bed. when i was in undergrad and i really had to get up for something important, i used to put my phone in a box on top of my dresser. in order to turn it off i had to get out of bed, drag a chair over to the dresser, stand on the chair, and open the box before i could shut it off. this required way more in the way of motor skills than just rolling over in bed and swiping the screen. this is an extreme example. now that i’m an “adult,” i put it just far enough away from the bed that i need to walk to it. other, saner options include apps that require you to solve a math problem or a puzzle, but in all honesty, i’ve tried those and just rolled over and passed back out anyway.
  2. pick a wake-up time and stick to it. mine is anywhere between 6:30 and 7:00 (which, I know, is not that early for those of you in high school, and believe me when i say i am so sorry). eventually your body will begin waking up at that time by itself, which is kind of horrific, but which also makes your life a lot easier. my advice is to gradually work your way towards that time, in 15- or 30-minute increments. on the weekends, when i stay in bed until 8 or 9, i feel like a goddamn kardashian. height of luxury.
  3. have some early-morning jams ready. here are some playlists i love, or you can pick one song for the week. i’ve been using this one. on the days i’m feeling particularly daring i let myself lie back in bed until the song’s over, and then i get up. this is pretty dangerous, though, so use cautiously.
  4. drink water. you can do this when you wake up, like all the fitblrs tell you. or you can do what i do, which is to drink between 8 and 12 ounces immediately before going to bed, so that when my alarm goes off my first thought is how badly i need to pee. unless you’ve got some ongoing health issues, that usually requires you to get out of bed and walk to the bathroom. 
  5. open all your blinds before you go to bed. i know, this seems counter-intuitive. but i’ve got a roommate who has those fancy light-blocking curtains and i never see her before 10:00. i, on the other hand, have an entire wall of windows and no curtains, just broken blinds circa 1980, and am up earlier than god himself. i’m not saying these things are related, but i think the facts speak for themselves.
  6. in an emergency: early morning flight? time for a nap after an almost-all-nighter? make the alarm harder to get to, sleep with the light on, or have a friend or parent in another time zone call you to make sure you’re awake.

also, maybe most importantly, remember that even though the act of waking up itself sucks ass, once you’re up and moving things are great. i get my best studying and reading done in the morning, and it’s the best time to sit for a minute and plan our your day. plus, you know, the sooner you get going, the sooner you can get back in bed. good luck my little bumblebees!!! 

EDIT: sequel!! how to go to bed and actually fall asleep.

So, and this is not spoilers but I just realized something, I finally figured out what bothered me about the April storyline. April herself never bothered me, what bothers me is Luke’s attitude. He’s super gung ho about “I’ve always kinda thought of Rory as my daughter” but refuses to let Lorelai into April’s life. At one point in this episode he even asserts (tiny miniscule spoiler) that April is his worry and he can take care of her financially by himself without Lorelai’s help. Coming from a blended family, this bothers me a lot because it’s really hypocritical, and sets the family up for failure before it even starts. And given how he feels about Christopher in Rory’s life, well, it just adds to the hypocrisy.

I hate that the fanbase blames April when really it was Luke’s actions that pushed Lorelai away, and it’s him who is still doing the same thing.

I’m so happy to hear Chelsea Manning will be freed this May. Tears came to my eyes when I heard the news. I really hope that she can start to heal once she is free and that she can eventually begin to live a happy and fulfilling life. I worry about how she’ll be able to adjust to a normal life outside of prison with such a high profile story and so many people hating her for the brave things she did.

“We are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided.”

I’m very confused on the amount of hate going around in this community. I thought HP was about magic, friendship, and overcoming the impossible with help from those friends… So why is there so much hate in it’s fandom? 

A couple of the roleplayers have been getting what seems like nonstop hate, be it about their cosplays, or they’re blog, or apparently even them as a person. I haven’t been left out of this train of hate ether, I’ve gotten several this last mouth, and since starting this blog in general. Typically, I ether respond with a witty gif or ignore all together if I feel I’m better than they are… However, several of my personal friends are being attacked now for no reason, a few of them are taking it really hard. 

A lot of us on tumblr come here to get away from the hardship of life, a few of us come here to be ourselves and make friends that understand us. With all this hate flying around the community it’s making even tumblr seem like an unwelcoming place. And what for? What is the point of causing other people that you don’t even know such pain? What do you get out of it? Nothing, you get nothing from it. All you’re doing is hurting a real person that probably already has very real issues going on in their life. How would you feel or handle it if it was you getting these messages of hate? Hm? Or what if it was your sister, or brother, maybe even your best friends? What would you do to protect them? Truth is we can’t do anything against cyber bullying,  but we can speak out, and I am now. Think about your family and friends and ask yourself how you would feel if they stopped doing the things they loved because someone online thought it would be fun to mentally torment them. Think about watching that wonderful person that you love disappear before your eyes because they no longer had anywhere they felt safe or wanted. Do those messages seem as funny now? 

Stop the bullying, there is no need for it here on tumblr. None of us are attacking you so why are you attacking us? What exactly did we do? If we have done something, DM one of us, I’m sure we can work through the issue like adults. And if we offended you somehow, just tell us respectfully and we’ll find a solution to the conflict. 

So please stop spreading hate on Tumblr, there’s enough of that already in the real world. 

i really hate the whole ‘you have it better than a lot of others’ argument against western women being feminists. i see it everywhere.

but like, you DONT KNOW what the person youre talking to has even experienced in their life. most people i argue with who tell me this dont know that my mother brainwashed me in a fundemental christian homeschool cult. they dont know i started watching porn and witnessing heavy violence being done to women by men at age 12. they dont know about my medical trauma starting from age six. they dont know about the five times i was raped. they dont know about all the trauma-based mental illnesses i have from being emotionally abused as a child. they dont know about the self-harming and the bulimia and the way i was treated as a submissive in bdsm relationships.

they want to believe that western culture is somehow NOT twisted and fucked up. they want us to accept it as normal. but i know what has happened to me is not fucking normal. and i wont pretend it is.

anonymous asked:

I'm feelin' really weird tbh because I used to get kinda mad when people criticized su (as would most people when something they enjoy gets picked apart) but reading blogs like yours, a lot of the claims are interesting and thoughtful and pretty right most of the time, it really started to make me rethink things and realize that this show really kinda is stagnating which sucks because it's been a big thing in my life recently but I just wanna say thanks b/c it's been really enlightening.

yeah dude you have to look through the eyes of someone who is disappointed and wants the show to do well instead of just assuming people like me hate the show

Please consider the following:

-Nino and Adrien as roomates in university
-Adrien majoring in Physics and minoring in Culinary Arts
-Nino majoring in Maths and minoring in Music Production
-SCIENCE BROS 
-Nino being Jade Turtle
-Wayzz and Plagg roaming around the house 
-Their apartment is always so.messy. and they only clean up when they can no longer find their kwamis among the mess or  Mari, Alya, or Nino’s parents come to visit. And it’s like “BRO CODE RED. I REPEAT CODE RED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.” and whoever is in the house is like shIT and they just jump off the couch and start stuffing the mess into the coat cupboard.
-There’s a pantry in the kitchen specifically for Camembert cheese, and an entire shelf on the fridge is stacked up with soup
-”AKUMA IN FINALS? WOW. RUDE.” “TELL ME ABOUT IT BRO”
-Post-akuma attack all-nighters. “I really hate my life bro. I hate it.” “Dude, ever heard of caffeine distillates?”
-Their bro guilty pleasure is watching soap operas together. sHH NO ONE MUST KNOW. 
-They invite the girls over when Nino *attempts* to cook. “nO GUYS YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THIS IS ADRIEN’S FINAL PROJECT AND IT’S DELICIOUS.”
-Good music always playing in the background b/c nino’s mad DJ skills.  
-Nino and Adrien doing the groceries together. “NO ADRIEN. WE DON’T NEED 100 CROISSANTS.” “YES WE DO.” 
-Laundry mishaps
-Coming up with stupid rules for the roommate agreement. “The offending party must capture a live duck and offer it in sacrifice to the victimized party if they ever forget to do their dishes.” 
-Them walking around the house wearing their transformations like it’s no big deal. 
-Adrien being so freaking excited to move out of the mansion. Nino and Mari driving to his house to help him move all his stuff. Alya and Mari helping them set up their apartment when they move in. Beer, pizza, and video games after all the hard effort. Profit. 
-”HONEY I AM HOME.”
-Anime marathons
-Movie marathons
-Sleepovers with the girls 
-Dubsmashing together when they have nothing better to do
-Snapping each other doing embarrassing stuff and sending the snaps to their corresponding girlfriends with the tag #husbandmaterial
-Them developing a meaningful lifelong friendship.
-Highkey they actually consider each other as a brother. 

I just… i need a minute. 


Nino and Adrien’s friendship is too pure for this world and it gives me  lot of emotions 

okay but can y’all imagine how that sherlock-holding-john scene must have ended for them like. at some point in time john must have sniffed really hard, kinda wiped his eyes while sherlock was still holding him, and then started to lift his head up. and i don’t know, maybe sherlock released him at that point and john was so embarrassed at that display of emotion that he did that weird stoic salute thing like at the end of trf (just minus the salute). that’s the most realistic option. that’s definitely something our john would do- or at least the john we know. but this is a new season, this is a different episode, and there’s not a lot about these characters that we do know anymore, not in the same way. this entire scene was a mofftiss fanfic fix-it to john’s emotional breakdown budding thus far in series 4. maybe we get to imagine a fix-it for the years and years of pining, something sooner than whatever’s gonna happen in tfp.

so maybe, maybe john pulled himself together and just stayed in sherlock’s embrace for a second and maybe. maybe he held sherlock back for a second maybe. his arms went around sherlock’s middle and they just stood there for a little. maybe sherlock left his head resting on john’s and john pressed his ear to sherlock’s chest and they both thought, this, this is what i’ve been waiting for. it’s not everything but it’s enough. i will be content with this.

that couldn’t have been the kiss scene because john was too emotionally wrecked, but not all kiss scenes have to be kiss scenes. maybe john lifted off of sherlock just a little bit and sighed, exhausted, and sherlock made to pull away but john just held him in place and. maybe john tilted his head up and sherlock pressed his forehead to john’s and maybe they both waited, not breathing, not wanting to make a movement or sound that would break whatever it was that was going on between them, but their last 20 minutes was up and they heard the door downstairs shut and knew molly was there and they just. pulled away and neither smiled, neither dared to, but they looked at each other for just long enough to know and well. and then they knew.

Since you started talking about Being Human UK on your other blog, I decided to watch it too. First of all: I LOVE IT! Buuuut…I really hate how they handled Nina’s death. I mean, I’m not saying I WANTED to see her get beaten to death, but I wish there was better closure for her.

ADMIN NOTE: Okay just to clarify, in case you don’t follow my main blog (@fandomlife-universe), I recently got into Being Human UK a few weeks ago and have been talking about it a lot on my main blog. And to you, confessor: I’m so happy that me talking about the show made you start watching it because it’s a really great show, but it ended a few years so the fandom isn’t really active anymore so I’m glad to kind of re-activate the fandom!

anonymous asked:

i am really fat everyone who meets me keeps warning me about my weight, i hate myself, but thing is i am too lazy to go excercise even though i know i should cause if i start it i have to maintain it for the rest of my life and i cant imagine going on the treadmill for the rest of my life i am just too lazy to do anything about my weight even though i know its within my control

In the end it all comes down to TWO things: your health and your happiness. If you’re healthy, then you can learn to be happy at any size. If a doctor is telling you to make some adjustments for health reasons, you can make some physical changes without doing something you hate. Simple lifestyle changes- talk to your doctor or a nutritionist about that kind of thing and work with them. If you don’t like the treadmill, don’s use it. You can just park further from the door when you go shopping, take the stairs instead of the elevator, go for walks around a park, or find some type of fitness class that you ENJOY.

Again, it’s about your health and happiness. If you don’t want to do anything about your weight, it’s your choice. You don’t have to… you can learn to accept the body you’re in. But if you feel you want to make those changes, there are ways of doing that while still enjoying your life and not doing something you hate.