I’m so fucking angry about ace representation and non-representation that I can’t not be rude about it tonight, and there’s specific examples that get me real mad atm that I need to share :
Sense 8 : so okay, for a show that is really awesome and inclusive, a scene got me real upset. Sex positivity isn’t only about beeing free to have sex whenever and however you want as long as there’s consent with all parties, it’s also about the freedom to not want it. So when Kala goes to Sun and Sun gives her a nice declaration about how sex is something sacred to be worshiped, I’m like this is bullshit, okay ? If you don’t want it, you don’t fucking want it dammit. It’s a real awesome sentiment behind the words for most people, but thank you for leaving out the rest of us.
Riverdale : so okay, I got into Riverdale recently and I was so freaking happy when I heard that my fav character was canonly ace in the comics !
And then ! I saw the loads of fanfics (I didn’t do the math but damn that’s got to be more than 50 %) with non-ace Jug. And that’s…it makes me angry but okay, you’re free to do what you want, even if it’s heartbreaking when you’re already an identity that’s erased from basically everything.
But what really got me angry is seeing that people said he couldn’t be canonically ace in the show. Why ? Because he kissed Betty…
Get your fact straight before writing this kind of bullshit because it’s hurtful, people ; asexuality doesn’t mean lack of romantic relationship/attraction, that’s being aromantic ! And I bet all ace, aro and acearo people are as tired as me at being mixed up all the damn fucking time !
Plus, I don’t know as much about aromantism that I know about asexuality (unfortunately), but if having sex doesn’t take away your ace identity, I think kissing someone doesn’t take away your aro identity (someone aro could correct me if I’m wrong ?).
Last thing in this rant, I read a soulmate AU fanfic with an asexual character once, I’m not saying which fandom because I’m betting there’s more than one like this one anyway. You know what got to me ? The fact that ace people in this couldn’t have a goddamn soulmate !
I don’t personally believe in soulmates so the idea that those ones could choose their own partner (as long as they were ace too, of course, seeing as the other ones /already had soulmates/), but on behalf of all the ace/aro people that do : that is utter bullshit !
You can have a soulmate without wanting to fuck them ! You can have a soulmate without wanting a romantic relationship with them !
If I believed in this idea, I would be ready to say I’ve found mine, and you know what ? It’s my best friend !
So get fucking lost, all of you, with your ideas that kissing means you’re not ace. That sex is the ultimate kind of love. That you can’t be in a relationship without sex. That you can’t have a soulmate without sex.
We’re a spectrum for god’s sake ! And we’re not incapable of love in a non-platonic way. Thanks you so much for ingraining in us the idea that no one will want us because of what we feel or don’t feel.
Edit: if anyone else wants to say that Kala isn’t ace, here is my answer on the fact it wasn’t what I was saying in this post -> x