i really know how to sell this don't i

Random Sentence Starters:
  • "Any time I say "asking for a friend" you know it's fake because I have no friends."
  • "God bless that ass."
  • "In eight hours I will have been awake for twenty four hours."
  • "If you want to get technical it costs exactly zero dollars to murder someone if you keep it simple."
  • "You can't snort Captain Crunch. That's what Cocoa Puffs are for."
  • "These skinny jeans are stifling."
  • "Are your pants made out of Fruit Loops?"
  • "Yoga pants are the reason corporations go bankrupt."
  • "Your mother would never lie to me."
  • "I'm pretty sure Ren and Stimpy were werewolves."
  • "It's like he has chicken pox but like... on his dick."
  • "Call the government."
  • "Everyone has that one emo band that got them through puberty."
  • "Between you and me I love her shoes but I hate everything that she stands for, if you know what I mean."
  • "The fact that the ocean exists is proof that God is a sadist."
  • "I don't speak German but I'm pretty sure that dude just said go fuck yourself."
  • "I'd sell my soul for a cheesy snack."
  • "I can't date guys who look better in eyeliner than I do."
  • "I didn't learn how to tie my shoes until I was sixteen and three quarters."
  • "If you know that vampires exist it's your civil duty to report that shit to someone."
  • "I'd really like to smack a bitch."
  • "Who gave you permission to breathe my air?"
  • "Would you rather fuck Edward Cullen or Peter Parker?"

anonymous asked:

So I guess questions about his personal life are a thing. As well as the lies... Sure Styles, you stalked your dates and now you don't and just.... I really wish he didnt have to do this. I know personal life sells and all but :((

Okay. Here’s for an unpopular opinion.

So far, I would wager that nearly everything has gone the way harry has wanted it to. He is doing what he wants, how he wants, and he has a team that is supporting him. At least that is how it looks right now.

If Nick, one of Harry’s close friends, brought it up, it’s because it was approved. Look, I won’t make a real judgment until we hear it, but for me at least… I’ve just got to consider that what might appear “bad” to me as a fan, might not be bad for Harry. There might be solid reasons why he is talking about itand I don’t feel comfortable anymore jumping to the idea that he’s forced to talk about this. Maybe he is, but maybe there’s a lot that we don’t know bts and maybe that is playing a role. Text can be misleading anyway and I think we should wait to hear it before jumping the gun.


This scene… Ginny is hurt, upset, jealous, annoyed because Mike prefers chatting with his ex-wife, his ex-wife who was supposed to be, I quote (from 1x02), :

‘‘ a pain-in-the-ass,
who’s just hellbent on ruining my life
even though we’re no longer married.
She wants me to go through my things,
you know, before she sells them.
What she really wants to do
is get back together with me

to talking to Ginny about what happened last night, so she’s feeling like the “almost-kissing” thing meant nothing to him (even if she said everything was good, I can’t help but notice that she’s really bothered by this)… Ugh, my two stubborn babies…

mitsommernacht  asked:

hey Conan you magical unicorn! first of all, let me start by saying that I love your energy! (I mean, I obvs don't know you, but from how you appear on social media you seem like a really fun person) what I wanted to ask is, are you okay with ppl downloading the audio of your original songs? I mean, just for personal enjoyment? Idk if that's rude or sth but some of them really comfort me when I'm sad :)

i don’t sell my music, so i guess you gotta do what you gotta do to listen! I’m so glad people enjoy it :)) thank you for the love !

anonymous asked:

do you know any online stores that sell trendy but cheap clothes? I wanna look cute but I don't wanna spend a bunch of money, you feel me?

Yeah, I know how it feels! That’s why I always buy from this and this shop because they always have huge sales going on so you can buy a lot of clothes for really cheap.


It seems like I’ve ended up serving the most boring master. Seeing as you have chosen death yourself, I am under no obligation to protect you.

The Signs as Generic Fanfiction Things
  • Aries: Crazy jealous (ex)girlfriend/most popular girl in school/thinks everyone loves her
  • Taurus: How does the bad boy have a crush on me? I'm just the nerd of the school with no friends...
  • Gemini: Vampires. Vampires everywhere.
  • Cancer: Like where is this chick's parents, they haven't been mentioned or seen once in this whole story
  • Leo: She's an outcast and everyone hates her but dresses like a supermodel to school everyday and does the things that all the popular people at my school do. Wtf man.
  • Virgo: I'm just a normal girl *best friend is Harry Styles*
  • Libra: Orbs
  • Scorpio: Whoa, smut in the second chapter, like, damn. Easy there tiger.
  • Sagittarius: "Adopted by _____?!" Or "My New Step-Brother, _____?!"
  • Capricorn: "My mom sold me to One Direction as a sex slave to pay off her drug debt!" Who the hell in the One Direction management is selling your mother drugs?!
  • Aquarius: Messy bun all day everyday
  • Pisces: Hella Mary Sue. No depth, just the perfect person you will ever meet. She could probably cure cancer and feed everyone in a third-world country at the same time cos that's how perfect she is.

In all the excitement about the new teaser, I want to take a minute to express how proud I am of Bangtan.

They have grown so much as a group and as people since debut. We’ve seen this metamorphosis from edgy, fuck-the-system hip hop kids, into mature and talented artists. And I mean artists in every sense of the word – Bangtan has learned to not only make quality music, but to turn their concepts into pristine visual and performance art.

Over the years we’ve been able to see the members come out of their shells. We’ve learned more about their struggles and insecurities and massive capabilities, we’ve been able to see just how dedicated they are to the backbreaking work they do. They each have their own personalities and strengths that weren’t apparent at debut. They’ve grown so constantly and I know they will never stop impressing us at every turn.

I know the Wings comeback hasn’t even happened yet but i’m ridiculously optimistic because EVERY TIME, Bangtan sets a higher standard for themselves and EVERY TIME they surpass it more than anybody believed they could.

I’m so proud of Bangtan and how far they’re come – from scrapping together concerts for 200 people, to selling out an Olympic arena. It’s all been because of their endless hard work and sacrifice. It’s really kind of incredible.

‘Sir, I’m trying to hook up two pieces of alien tech using spares from an electrical repair shop. My only guide is the research notes of a lunatic captain, who keeps breaking off from his findings to reminisce about old boyfriends. This isn’t standard field engineering, sir.’
—  The Men Who Sold The World (Guy Adams)
[oh don’t worry Sgt Leonard, you can probably sell those ‘notes’ to us for a much higher price than you’ll ever get for any alien tech anywhere XD]

(( Axis Powers for anon! These guys are also gonna be stickers I’m gonna start selling! I’ll be making a lot more of these too <3 ))

(( if you’re interested, message me! I don’t really have a store yet so- ))

my letters to the signs
  • Aries: You’ve taught me so much about who I am as a person. Forgive me for doing what was best for me. I hope you discover who you really are and aren’t afraid to show it. You deserve so much.
  • Taurus: I will never be able to thank you enough for all you've done for me. Words fail me to describe how truly wonderful you are. You don't get enough credit.
  • Gemini: Your ability to see things from every possible perspective makes you wise beyond your years. You always know exactly what to say to help others. Let others help you more.
  • Cancer: The way you find humor in life is inspiring. You carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, yet you make it seem so simple. I hope you find peace soon.
  • Leo: The adventures with you never stop, and I'm so happy we're in this together. We have each other every step of the way. Just text me back every once in a while.
  • Virgo: Thanks for putting up with all of my bullshit. Your analytical eye is a pain in the ass sometimes, but you always come out on top because of it. Try not to worry so much tho.
  • Libra: I wish I could've gotten to know you better. We could've been pretty good friends but you had 'bigger priorities'. Try not to sell yourself short.
  • Scorpio: I can't really apologize for what I did, especially after how much you manipulated me, but I do wish I never had to hurt you. I hope you've grown from this, somehow.
  • Sagittarius: I can't thank you enough for being my helping hand. You've never steered me in the wrong direction, and I know I can always count on you. Come home more.
  • Capricorn: It's amazing how much you handle each and every day, and yet you still find time to you comfort me and help me at a moment's notice. Don't ever give up when things get hard.
  • Aquarius: Thank you for bringing light and humor into my darkest days. You were a silent leg for me to stand on, waiting in the shadows for the 'ok'. Stay brilliant and magical. Stay you.
  • Pisces: There's so much I want to say to you. I can't wait to explore you, and all that makes you tick. I can't wait for you to finally let me. It's going to be okay. It's going to be incredible.

chimeridae  asked:

Well, yeah, he did make the core, but... there's nothing really saying explicitly that he made the true lab or much else; we don't know how old Alphys is or when the true lab was built, and she's worked there, so I feel it's safe to assume she made it. I guess I'm just saying that there's only limited info on Gaster, we can't say he did stuff for sure unless it's made 100% certain. Let's not discount the things Alphys /has/ probably done, please..

If you got hired to be a scientist and owned a home, and had to create a lab, why would you sell your home and move, and make a new giant lab, with an elevator to and underground lab, all without anywhere to live? Papyrus sends her to the lab when he sends her home and calls it her lab-home thing, she lives in that lab. She doesn’t have another home, she moved when she became Royal Scientist. Sure Alphys modified it, especially the inside of the top lab to make it her room, she worked in the true lab as Royal Scientist. It was the Royal scientist lab, not hers. Gaster’s experiment recording is found in the true lab. There is no way his recording could be in there if he was scattered across time and space before the lab was made. This is basic logic.

The followers talk about how brilliant Gaster was, how he made the core, how his life was cut short, how Asgore took a long time to hire another Royal scientist. The game says it. This isn’t a headcanon or theory.

In addition, Alphys wouldn’t be confused or have made a map of the core if she made it. Charles (the mole in a hard hat) works at the core and explains how the rooms can be moved around and the layout can be changed, which is what Mettaton bribed them to do. This is mentioned in the game. Again, basic logic dictates Alphys would not be confused or flustered if she made it. It would be like the inventor of the Rubik’s cube (mr. Rubik I assume) getting upset and saying you broke it when you twist the cube so the colors aren’t the same on each side like it was when he last looked at it.

This isn’t me taking stuff away from Alphys, it’s stuff she never did in the first place. People just haven’t done their research.

Helpless Part 1: In The Eye Of A Reckoning - A Nessian Fic

Follows on from Hurricane but you definitely don’t need to have read that one in order to read this. Thank you, thank you to my darling @widowshulk for betaing and my dear @illyrian-baby for cheerleading me allll the way through this.

I’ve been working on this piece for a long time now (it was actually prompted but I think that poor person has since died of boredom waiting for me) so I’m a bit nervous about it all things considered. 

Title: Helpless Part 1: In The Eye Of A Reckoning

Summary: Set post ACOMAF. Cassian and Nesta first time scenario. The two work out the secrets that have been poisoning their souls for some time now and surrender themselves entirely to one another. 

TeaserHe’s…Different. Unlike anyone else she’s ever met. Hard and soft all at once; a gentle warrior; a compassionate killer; a kind battle commander; a good man.

And somehow; some faint but insistent feeling deep in her gut whispers that he’s hers. Her counter and balance. Her match, able to handle her without ever conquering her. Her equal – one who can and will always give as good as he gets. Her destruction or her salvation, the one who has the potential to be either or somehow both at once. When most of the men around her had struggled her entire life to be anything to her at all… This man; Cassian; was everything. And she had no idea how to respond to that.

Link: AO3 

Rage. Anger. Fury.

There’s a fire that burns inside her. Burns and burns and burns. In that miserable, frozen hovel they had struggled to carve out an existence in it had been her salvation. Feyre had had her stubborn defiance and the oath she had made their mother. Elain had had her gentle, unassuming hope which had been the greatest strength and light any of them had shown in that darkness.

But she had only had that bitter anger to fuel her and keep her going. Now the thing that had given her life all those years is killing her. It’s ceased fuelling her and has instead begun feeding on her. It’s devouring her a little more and a little more every day, destroying her from the inside.

Pain and guilt and grief join the torrent of anger and her soul becomes a hurricane beneath her paper thin skin. Terror flares as it rages inside her and she realises she can’t control it. Magic begins to well inside her, the sting of it now sickeningly familiar. Everything amplifies, getting bigger and stronger and louder until it numbs and deafens and blinds her to everything that isn’t her and this twisted power.

She fights it. She clenches her fists and clamps down upon it. She tries to force it to submit to her. She tries to wrestle it into submission. She tries to force it to yield to her.

 She fights. It wins.

The scream – of agony, of anguish – bursts from her as the pulse of magic erupts. Nesta crumples to her knees as her room explodes around her. It wrecks her in the process. She is left more shattered than the smashed windows and splintered furniture. The destroyer of the destroyed. The powerful powerless. The unbreakable broken. The Made unmade. The invincible immortal ruined by her own hands.


Cassian yawns expansively, giving his wings a habitual shake to try and rouse him. The still tattered edges sting at the sudden, jolting motion and he grits his teeth, biting back the hiss of pain. They were better than they had been. In that regard he hadn’t lied to his brothers but…Rhys and Azriel knew anyway. They knew that he pretended to be better than he was. They knew some small part of him still feared, even after all these centuries, not being important, not being useful, not being needed.

So he insisted he was all right, ready to return to his duties, to prepare them for war. And his brothers accepted this, even when they knew he lied. Azriel’s eyes he felt on him in particular. Watching, his brother was always watching, watching everything. But when his hazel eyes watched him they were riddled with pain and guilt.

At night he’s felt his brother’s quiet, anguished presence there with him. When he wakes sweating and screaming, his wings ripped from his back again, he feels Azriel’s guilt there too. That only made him more determined to keep going, to be fine though he was far from it.

Weeks ago he had told Nesta he would have given up those wings a hundred times over to save his brother’s life. That hadn’t changed. It never would. Nesta had believed him; had understood that sacrifice. Azriel never would.

His brother burned with guilt for his loss – a loss he knew Az understood; pain he knew Az saw. They knew each other too well for him to truly hide anything. But for now Az knew he needed them to pretend they believed him, pretend everything was all right and so he did.

Cassian sighs heavily, rolling his shoulders to work the tension from them. That unbearable, near continual restlessness that has plagued him since Hybern builds in him once again. Ordinarily he would have flown to chase away these feelings. He would have launched himself into the sky until the cool night air swept away every issue and concern. What he wouldn’t give to lose himself once more in the wind’s tender, comforting embrace.

But…but there was no point pining after what he couldn’t have. They all had too much to concern themselves with now war was brewing to worry about what they didn’t have. The healers told him to have hope; that he may fly again. In a way that vague promise was worse than none at all.

 He wanted to know what he was dealing with. He wanted to be able to see the field before him. He could work with the soldiers he had, train them, shape them, inspire them, command them. He could deal with resources he knew he didn’t have; find ways to work himself around their lack. Things he might have frustrated him. Those he could do nothing with. They weren’t real and so couldn’t be used. But they might be and so they could not be dismissed either.

Growling darkly to himself Cassian drags a hand through his shaggy hair. Then he squares his shoulders and forces himself to continue on down the corridor. Marshalling himself he tries to go back over the points discussed at the meeting he had just left, seeking to distract himself. He has little success. 

A scream catches his attention instead, obliterating everything else around him. Chaos erupts following the shriek; as though a hurricane is tearing through part of the house. Causing his Siphons to burn like flames Cassian draws on his power. He lets it thunder through his blood, flooding his system, reading him for the fight. Then he sprints towards the source of destruction while servants hurry away. They part to let him pass, knowing better than to stand between him and whatever dares to try and harm those he loves.

As he draws nearer he realises that the source of the disturbance is Nesta’s room. His power flares more sharply in him, longing to devour any who would hurt her, his High Lord’s ward, his High Lady’s sister, his…

The snarl of fury rips from him as he bursts through her door. The action sends it flying off its already damaged hinges. As he balances himself he reaches for the sword at his back, taking up a position to both attack and defend.

He had promised to protect her. He failed her in Hybern. He had sworn a second, silent oath to himself never to do so again.

Scanning the room for any threats he keeps his practiced eyes sharp, even through his blind fury that any would dare threaten them here. However Cassian realises within a few heartbeats that they’re completely  alone in her room.

Understanding floods him the moment he finds her hunched on the floor in front of him. She's cowering – cowering – head hung, body slumped in the midst of the wreckage that surrounds him. Both the eye of the hurricane and its most devastated victim.

Despite her newly enhanced Fae form and all its accompanying strengths she seems so small huddled before him. In the mortal world, as a human, she had stood before him with the confidence, bearing and command of a queen. Now, as a Fae….That Cauldron hadn’t Made her; exactly the opposite.

Releasing his power and allowing the build up to dissipate, leaving only the usual faint rumbling behind, he steps into the room. He goes to her, steps deliberately heavy so he doesn’t startle her by approaching her from behind. Once he’s close enough to her small, hunched form he reaches out and places a gentle hand on her shoulder, trying to offer her some comfort and solace.

It’s thrown off with a violent strength a heart beat later. “Don’t touch me!” she spits viciously at him.

Her whole body trembles uncontrollably like a wild animal that’s been wounded and corned. Somehow he can sense the terror and pain rippling from her in waves, like the aftershocks of a boulder hurled into a pool far too small to contain it.

Cassian takes a step back, his hands raised in a gesture of surrender even though she’s shrunk in on herself again, back to him, and can’t see. Resigned, he decides to leave her in peace. Giving her a chance calm down should help. He'll return and see if she’ll let him help her once she’s had a chance to compose herself and doesn’t feel as ragged and raw and vulnerable.

Then he notices the trickle of blood that weeps from her shoulder in soft crimson tears. He freezes mid-step then changes his mind. Padding into the adjoining washroom he gathers together water, bandages and a bottle of ointment to tend to the gash. It needs to be bound up until her depleted strength returns enough for her to heal it herself.

Returning to the bedroom he crouches down in front of her. She refuses to acknowledge his presence but he sets down the things he’d collected from the bathing room anyway. 

“You’re bleeding,” he tells her in a low growl, gesturing to her torn shoulder.

His warm hazel eyes seek out the cold, battered blue-grey steel of hers. She avoids him still, sparing a cursory glance to her shoulder instead. Shrugging, she hunches further away from him, dismissive. “It’s fine,” she mutters back to him, a flicker of characteristic snap edging her words but no more.

“It’s not,” he says words blunt but still gentle. They soften further when he adds, “Let me take a look.”

Her eyes meet his this time. Drawn to him by the same irresistible instinct that kept him here even after she’d snarled at him to leave, wanting to make sure she was all right. Whatever she sees in his gaze, in him, seems to thaw the armour of ice that always entombs her. After a long moment she jerks her head at him, permitting him to approach and tend to her.

With careful, if callused fingers, Cassian eases the strap of her dress down her arm, baring the wound to him. Leaning in close he can feel her ragged breaths hot on his cheek for a moment. Then she turns her head away from him, staring out of the now empty window to avoid him. He probes cautiously at the long, deep rents in her skin, trying to assess the extent of the damage.

Nesta jolts round to face him with a sharp hiss when his thumb grazes over one of the raw edges accidentally. He flicks his eyes up to check on her but she’s already looked away again, as though afraid of looking at him. Or else of being truly seen by him.

“Sorry,” he growls quietly to her. 

That makes her turn to face him again. For the brief moment that their eyes meet Cassian feels something stir in him. Something that ties him to her. It’s there, if only for that single pounding heartbeat. And gone again the moment she tears her gaze from his.

Pulling himself together Cassian irritably brushes off the flash of feeling. Then he uses the ointment to clean the cuts, murmuring soft apologies to her when she grimaces in pain. Then he bandages them, trying to avoid touching her bare skin with his as much as possible. Every time he does so a spark seems to jump between like, like lightning flaring from her to him. He knows that she can feel it too, though she tries to pretend otherwise. Neither of them mentions it.

As he works Cassian fixes his gaze on her, trying to assess her condition. His hands remain gentle but a trace of steel lines his next words. “You need to learn how to control this,” he tells her flatly, keeping eye contact with her the whole time. 

He feels her body stiffen beneath his touch in response to those words. Softening slightly he caresses her arm with his hand he slides it slowly down until it meets hers. Then he takes it between his fingers and squeezes gently, trying to take some of the sting out of the admonishment. “You’re going to hurt someone,” he murmurs, trying to make his intentions clearer. “You’re going to hurt yourself. And it could be much more than a scratch next time.”


Keep reading

  • Lizardman Overlord: So here's what we're going to do - we're going to infiltrate the upper levels of the primarily mammalian species living on Sol 3, and we're going to put ourselves in key positions of power. Presidents, Kings, Queens, Prime Ministers, the lot.
  • Lizardman #2: Okay, right. Yes.
  • Lizardman Overlord: What?
  • Lizardman #2: Nothing.
  • Lizardman Overlord: No, what? What is it?
  • Lizardman #2: No, it's just… why?
  • Lizardman Overlord: Well, to shape their society and culture, obviously.
  • Lizardman #2: Obviously, yeah, but why, though? To what end?
  • Lizardman Overlord: So we can control them!
  • Lizardman #2: And what do we get out of that?
  • Lizardman Overlord: I'm sorry?
  • Lizardman #2: How does that benefit us?
  • Lizardman Overlord: We will have power!
  • Lizardman #2: Yeah, but on a planet full of monkeys who haven't even really made it that far out into space. I mean, they don't even know how to build quark matter/antimatter propulsion engines yet.
  • Lizardman Overlord: Well, no, that's true.
  • Lizardman #2: Plus, y'know, we'll be in disguise. We'll be disguised AS THEM. So they won't even know to be scared of lizardmen beyond a basic "Ah, it's a giant lizard person, we've never seen one of those before" sort of fear.
  • Lizardman Overlord: Oh yeah. Like when we saw those molemen.
  • Lizardman #2: Precisely.
  • Lizardman Overlord: I'm sorry, I guess I didn't really think it through.
  • Lizardman #2: No, it's okay, don't beat yourself up over this.
  • Lizardman Overlord: I guess I'm just feeling competitive. Did you know the Rock People of Carbonis IX have enslaved the entire Decalaxian race?
  • Lizardman #2: Oh?
  • Lizardman Overlord: Yeah, came in over the wire this morning. I guess I'm just feeling sort of, y'know, a bit inferior. Like I haven't really done anything with my tenure as Grand Overlord of the Magnificent Race of Lizardpersons.
  • Lizardman #2: Yeah, no, I can imagine how that must feel. But you can't hold yourself to the standards of other races with vastly different cultural norms and expectations. You're doing good stuff! Unemployment is down, prosperity is up, there's a good ratio of children being born to children being eaten by their parents. You helped make that happen. Don't sell yourself short.
  • Lizardman Overlord: Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Thank you. You always know what to say.
  • Lizardman #2: Any time.
  • Lizardman Overlord: I love you.
  • Lizardman #2: I love you too.
Breaking Bad Sentence Meme (Season One)
  • "How does it feel to be a smart ass?"
  • "Like I said, no one is looking for you."
  • "That's right. Either that...or I turn you in."
  • "Listen, if you've gone crazy or something I mean, if you've gone crazy or depressed, I'm just saying that's something I need to know about. Okay?"
  • "Oh what, I can talk now?"
  • "What is his reputation for violence?"
  • "Well, um, he did try to kill us both yesterday, so there's that."
  • "Make yourself at home, why don't you?"
  • "God. I don't suppose you could kiss my ass?"
  • "He sells you pot?"
  • "Yeah, no shit. Thanks for noticing."
  • "So right now, what I need, is for you to climb down out of my ass."
  • "Can you do that? Will you do that for me, honey? Will you please, just once, get off my ass, you know? I'd appreciate it, I really would."
  • "I didn't ask for any of this!"
  • "Because you didn't follow my instructions!"
  • "Oh well, heil Hitler, bitch!"
  • "I love you, you little bastard."
  • "You know, you keep telling me that I don't have it in me."
  • "So you're not angry?"
  • "How do you mean? Angry? No. Live and let live, man."
  • "Whatever, man. I just want to go home."
  • "I'm sorry...I'm sorry...I'm so sorry..."
  • "The soul? There's nothing but chemistry here."
  • "I have cancer. Lung cancer. It's bad."
  • "Who sent you? You wearing a wire? You setting me up?"
  • "Yeah, you know...what you call...a debrief? Maybe we could like...I thought we could debrief."
  • "Wow, that's...that's what you think we need, to debrief?"
  • "Seriously, I got dudes that would give their left nut for a little more."
  • "Right on, little bro! Making mad in-roads with the business community."
  • "Then why don't you just fucking die already? Just give up and die."
  • "Alright, I've got the Talking Pillow now."
  • "But...what I want...what I want, what I need, is a choice."
  • "Sometimes I feel like I never actually make any of my own. Choices, I mean. My entire life it just seems I never...you know, had a real say about any of it."
  • "No matter what happens, no more bloodshed. No violence."
  • "Cancer. You got it, right?"
  • "That's why you're doing all this. You want to make some cash for your people before you check out."
  • "Yeah. I mean, I used to until you killed him."
  • "I don't imagine I'll be here very long."
  • "Where...did that come from? And why was it so damn good?"
  • "A junkyard? Let me guess, you picked this place?"
  • "This is...This is like a...a non-criminal's idea of a drug meet. This is like, 'Oh, I saw this in a movie. Ooh, look at me.'"
  • "Yeah science!"
  • "And that'll cut through a lock? Because this is supposed to be one big-ass lock."
  • "Just remember who you're working for."
  • "Like they don't already know that? Are you saying they're stupid?"
  • "Oh yeah, so you're not saying they're stupid. So I don't understand. Are you saying that I'm stupid?"
  • "Damn, man! Look at that! Look! Yeah, that's messed up!"

anonymous asked:

I really really want to be team spring but I just don't see how it's profitable? I mean I know that the attention they'll be getting as a band will be ridiculous but the fact that there's a huge possibility that there won't be another single from four means that they've got nothing to sell to potential consumers. It would be more advantageous in a business perspective for them to up the publicity of a CO while they've got something to sell. Would love to be wrong though. I just want them happy.

If there’s no single, the band still needs to stay relevant during the break and I’m sorry but the same old papped alone pics will not make it this time. The fandom needs unity from ot4, the lies have to stop, the band needs to rebrand and they really do need to pull something out of their sleeves now that really everyone is listening.

Nothing to sell?
- How about 57 shows of the tour - because the tour cashes in the most money and not the album.
- How about doing it for HL’s sake and
- as a business decision doing it to keep the current fans
- and attract other fans too?
- attract enough fans who when album5 comes out would buy it without a second thought

It’s not always about selling. It’s for saving the future of ot4, it needs to happen, now more than ever.

one thing i need everyone to understand is that when i say that i love bucky barnes i don’t mean it like “oh he’s a really interesting and great character that i like very much” no i mean it like “i literally love him with all of my goddamn heart and i think about him literally every day and all i want is for him to be safe and happy and i would legit sell my soul for that to happen and it’s pretty much gotten to a point where he’s almost like a real person in my life and i know how ridiculous that is but i don’t even care anymore i just love him so much”

anonymous asked:

I really can't stand to watch most movies. It's always the same cliche thing of having a male and female fall in love and have sex right after. I don't mind watching a demi-romantic relationship but I hate how everything always leads to sex.I know that sex sells in movies but I find sex and romance in movies to be distracting from the story line. I'd really like to see a movie with a major male and female character remain friends without all the unnecessary kissing/bed scenes.


Working Late Shifts
  • Phone: *rings*
  • Clerk: Hello, this is Better Books. How can I help you today?
  • Phone: *static* Greetings, madame. *static* I interest you *static* product *static*
  • Clerk: Hello? I can't make out what you're saying.
  • Phone: *static*
  • Clerk: *hangs up*
  • Manager: Who called?
  • Clerk: I don't know. The line was staticky.
  • Manager: Whatever, I need you to work closing shift tonight.
  • Clerk: Isn't Jen closing tonight?
  • Manager: She can't, she got caught in a pile-up.
  • Clerk: Oh gosh, is she okay?
  • Manager: She's fine but her car is wrecked.
  • Clerk: That sucks, but I don't know if I can work closing tonight.
  • Manager: Okay, then you're fired.
  • Clerk: What!?
  • Manager: I'm going to give this to you straight, you're not a reliable employee. You've missed a ton work, you leave early without warning, and you exceeded your no-call, no-show limit. Anyone else would've fired you by now, but I'm a nice guy, so I'm giving you a choice: either you close tonight, or you lose your job.
  • Clerk: Fine, I'll close.
  • Manager: Good.
  • Clerk: *under breath* asshole.
  • *hours later*
  • Clerk: Fuck, this is so boring. Why does a book store still even exist in 2016?
  • *door jingles*
  • Creepy Guy: *walks in* Evening!
  • Clerk: Hello. Is there anything I can help you with?
  • Creepy Guy: Just browsing, dear.
  • Clerk: Okay. I'm here if you need anything.
  • Phone: *rings*
  • Clerk: Hello, this is Better Books. How can I help you tonight?
  • Phone: Now this thing decides to work! Sorry for the issues we had earlier this afternoon, madame.
  • Clerk: Hmm?
  • Phone: You sound like a much more charming young woman without all of the interference, if I say so myself. Oh, is that not work appropriate! Sorry! You can't tell with all of these new workplace regulations these days. Hahahaha!
  • Clerk: Sir, do you need something?
  • Phone: Yes, I need just a brief moment of your time. You see, I'm selling quite the product and I believe that a wonderful young lady such as yourself would have a lot to benefit from it.
  • Clerk: Sorry, we're not interested.
  • Phone: Wait just one mome-
  • Clerk: *hangs up*
  • Creepy Guy: *leans over store counter* Hey.
  • Clerk: Oh! Sorry, I didn't notice you. Is there anything I can help you with?
  • Creepy Guy: *smiles* No, I'm still just browsing.
  • Clerk: Okay.
  • Creepy Guy: What are you doing after work?
  • Clerk: Uhh, going home.
  • Creepy Guy: Need a ride?
  • Clerk: No, I walk. Are you interested in buying any books today?
  • Creepy Guy: Maybe. I just like to talk to my fellow readers. Not many people around your age read these days. Sad how your generation is. You like to read, don't you?
  • Clerk: Not really.
  • Creepy Guy: *frowns* You work at a book store and you don't like to read? That's weird.
  • Clerk: I mean, I do like to read! Just not often. I'm very busy, nowadays. *sweats nervously*
  • Creepy Guy: That's good.
  • Clerk: We're closing soon.
  • Creepy Guy: I know. *walks to the back of the store*
  • Clerk: *dials brother on cellphone once creepy guy is out of sight*
  • Clerk: Hey, I need you to pick me up tonight. There's a creeper at the store and-
  • Salesman: THANK GOODNESS! You've called back, madame. I thought I had missed out on a sale, but thankfully my master salesmanship has pulled through agai-
  • Clerk: *hangs up*
  • Creepy Guy: On your cellphone during work hours? Kids these days. I have it in me to tell your manager about this.
  • Clerk: Sorry, sir!
  • Creepy Guy: Hehe, I'm just messing with you. Who were you calling?
  • Clerk: No one. Just checking the time.
  • Creepy Guy: There's a clock right there. Can't you read a clockface?
  • Clerk: I just wanted to make sure the time was accurate.
  • Creepy Guy: A good old analog clock has always been accurate to me. You got a boyfriend?
  • Clerk: Sir, that's not an appropriate question to ask.
  • Creepy Guy: And it's not appropriate for you to be on your cellphone while you're working. I think you already voided the whole appropriateness thing, girl. *smiles*
  • Clerk: We're closing, you might want to leave.
  • Creepy Guy: Really? Judging by the clock up there, there's another five minutes until closing. I think I'll stick around until then. *walks to the back of the store*
  • *cellphone rings*
  • Clerk: Please don't be a salesman!
  • Bro: Salesman? What?
  • Clerk: Thank god! *ducks below the counter* Listen, I need you to get here now. There's this creeper in the store who keeps asking me questions and I have to close tonight. He's not leaving until I do. I don't want to be stuck outside in the dark with him. Please come.
  • Bro: Whoa, sis. Sounds like a bad situation. Nothing that my product can't solve, though.
  • Clerk: Oh my fucking god!
  • Salesman: No need for strong language, madame. Sorry for the cruel joke, but you wouldn't have let me get a good word in otherwise. I-
  • Clerk: *hangs up*
  • Creepy Guy: What're you doing down there?
  • Clerk: Oh, I was just cleaning.
  • Creepy Guy: Cleaning, huh? Sounded like you were talking about me.
  • Clerk: ...
  • Creepy Guy: Do you think I'm going to do something bad to you when you leave the store? You need big bro to scare me off.
  • Clerk: ...
  • Creepy Guy: You kids today are fucking shitheads. *spits at clerk*
  • Creepy Guy: *leaves store*
  • Clerk: Fucking Christ!
  • Clerk: *closes store*
  • Clerk: *walks out into the empty night*
  • Salesman: *skitters out of sight*
  • Clerk: *looks around* There's no one around. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
  • Clerk: *begins walk home down isolated woodland path*
  • Owl: *hoots*
  • Clerk: *jumps* FUCK! I'm getting scared by nothing.
  • Car: *lights flicker on down the path*
  • Clerk: Uhh.
  • Car: *revs engine*
  • Clerk: *tries to run away*
  • Car: *careens into clerk at full speed*
  • Creepy Guy: *gets out of car* I wasn't going to do anything until you called me a creeper, you little bitch.
  • Creepy Guy: *ties up clerk and drops clerk in car's trunk*
  • Salesman: Monsieur!
  • Creepy Guy: Who the fuck is there?
  • Salesman: *skitters out of the woods*
  • Creepy Guy: What the fuck are you wearing? Is that a Cousin It costume?
  • Salesman: It's not costume, monsieur. This is how I really look. Oh, pardon my rudeness. *takes off its top hat with a spindly arm and bows*
  • Salesman: I've been trying to get in contact with your wife all day. You see, I'm but a simple salesman. I know you're on your way home, but I'd like you to hear me out first. The product I'm selling would be most benefic-
  • Creepy Guy: *shoots salesman* I don't have time for this shit.
  • Salesman: *falls over dead*
  • Creepy Guy: *locks trunk and gets into car*
  • Salesman: *in the passenger seat* Well, that was very rude of you!
  • Creepy Guy: What the fuck!? *shoots at salesman*
  • Salesman: *dodges* I assure you, monsieur, I won't fall for the same trick again!
  • Creepy Guy: What the fuck are you!?
  • Salesman: I am but a humble salesman! *grabs creeper by the head and smashes it against the dashboard until he's a bloody pulp*
  • Salesman: Sorry about that, Monsieur, but I had to let off some steam. Being shot makes me ever so angry. Monsieur? Monsieur? Oh, you're dead aren't you! Jiminy, I've done it again. Well, I can still turn this into a sale.
  • Salesman: *snaps creepy guy's finger and signs a contract with it* Alright. There we go! Signed, Mr. Creeper. Thank you for lending me your blood, monsieur. Now that the contract's signed, you should be getting your product in no less than a week. Shipping fees apply. If you have any other questions, do feel free to call me. Oh, and sorry about your trigger finger. Haha, just some gallows humor from me! *leaves car and skitters off into the woods*
  • Clerk: *wakes up* Fuck, I'm tied up! Fuck! HELP! SOMEONE HELP ME! IS ANYONE THERE!? PLEASE HELP!