i pretend not to care

sometimes everything is real and sometimes nothing is real. sometimes i believe in everything and sometimes i believe in nothing. discovering yourself is supposed to be a life long journey but fuck that feels like way too long to figure myself out because i can’t find much to care about because i don’t know what i really care about and what i pretend to care about because i’m supposed to and what i think i care about but i don’t think i really do. and i don’t know who i am or what i’m doing. i don’t feel happy. i hardly get excited, i only pretend to. i legitimately get excited about what could happen after eye die though and it’s weird how that’s on that list of excitement. i think there’s no point sometimes and other times i think there is and with everything in between i’m lost.

- i don’t know.

love is in the air

Yuuri’s sure if it got even a degree colder, his balls would end up bluer than the goddamn sky.

“O-o-of all the t-t-times, wh-why now?” he stutters, stuffing his hands further into his track suit pockets. Any deeper and he might just rip a hole through the material, but Yuuri couldn’t care less. It’s freezing, and he knows as night falls, it’s only about to get colder.

He’s no stranger to harsh weather- Hasetsu has hit him with ridiculously hot summers and chilly winters, but Russia’s cold bites in a way no other place ever has. Yuuri’s spent a majority of his life in an ice skating rink, but the sheer amount of pain he feels at the moment is unnatural. No amount of exposure to ice could possibly prepare him for this.

“The fuck is wrong with you?”

It’s a familiar voice, the anger and stubbornness a comfort that cuts through the fog in Yuuri’s brain. He never would’ve thought Yurio’s voice would be a source of such happiness, but it is.

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I love you with everything I have and it’s tearing me apart to walk away from you but I have to. You don’t care anymore, you don’t want this anymore and I can’t pretend anymore. I love you but I have to walk away.
—  Leohearts

Why do some fans mistake Soukoku with Shizaya?!
Saying that their relationship is abusive and they hate each other to the core
Like you never watched the episode 21…..
You never saw how they trust or REALLY care about each other??? 

I’m not telling you to ship them it’s your choice and everyone can do what they want but at least Don’t spread some untrue shit about Soukoku

I’m Not Strong Enough

What if Aaron was just a little bit taller than Andrew? Not even a few inches, just a few centimeters. You can barely notice it but it’s there and it makes Andrew so mad. Aaron holds it over him f o r e v e r

You ask me why I don’t care anymore, I laugh at your face and think about it.. I don’t care because I am tired of being messed with, being hurt and being used. I don’t care because people always end up taking the oh so caring person for granted. I don’t care because you fucked me over and chose to pretend i didn’t care even when it killed me inside. I am shocked how you still have the adaucity to ask me why I don’t care. My mind thinks of possible replies and I all I can say is I just don’t.
—  Excerpt from a book I will never write #1210