i ought to be ashamed of myself

My Take on Brokeback Mountain

Yes, I know. It came out 12 years ago, but I just watched it quite recently. I ought to be ashamed of myself, really. I’m still feeling quite sentimental about the ending, so let’s just reminisce some of the iconic quotes from the movie.

I personally love the movie, and I must say that I teared up for the star-crossed lovers that are Jack and Ennis. But no, I don’t want to put a label on their sexuality. It’s a story about love, with the great plain backdrop and the mundane family setting, so there should be no point in complicating a film about the universality of love, which has affected countless of people, regardless of age, sex, ethnicity, and sexual orientation.

If you still insist on making it political, then look at the reason why Ennis rejects Jack all these times. It’s trauma, trauma that makes homophobia so entrenched within him that he feels guilty just being with Jack. Let me recall you how ever since Ennis was younger, his dad showed him the corpse of a homosexual couple who has been lynched by the villagers. This kind of experience makes him afraid of acknowledging his latent homosexual feelings, and even at the end, when Jack was reported dead, supposedly from an accident, Ennis’s mind was still reenacting a quite possible scene of Jack being bludgeoned to death. He just can’t move out from the childhood trauma, and this has resulted in the tragic end of a perfect love story.

How is it relevant to this day, you ask? Well, homophobia is still out there, and Brokeback Mountain is a rather good example to show what are the consequences of it. Same-sex couple who can’t be together is just one thing, but how about the hate crime? How about the ‘family’ that these people build around them to disguise themselves? It’s just a cycle of never ending lies.

Read more about it here.   


Valentino Rossi, notable race wins: 2003, Brno.
“I was a condemned man, condemned to win…”

Rossi’s first victory since Mugello (4 races without wins); he was of course on the podium in every race, but the media were ablaze with talks of “the pressure of the championship getting to him psychologically”. Unbeknownst to the media and the public,  this was the time during which Rossi was re-evaluating his future at Honda; it was also when he made the decision to leave Honda and sign with Yamaha.

“I need to feel part of a group and, at Honda, there no longer was a group to be part of. The situation was so bad, that the unthinkable was happening: I was no longer enjoying racing. It seemed impossible to me. Impossible and unthinkable.”

If I ever finished second, I’d find myself on trial for not winning. Nobody ever considered the fact that I might have still run a good race and that maybe one of my opponents had basically performed better than me on the day. No, I had lost. And I ought to be ashamed of myself. If I won, it was normal, it was no big deal. If I lost, I had failed.

“This gag was supposed to be ironic, underscoring my situation with Honda. Everybody expected a victory of me. So I was a condemned man, condemned to win…