i never ever wanted this but alas

dramallamadingdang replied to your post “dramallamadingdang replied to your post “Hi there! You don’t know me,…”

No, none of my old fic is online. I’d have to find the ‘zines in storage and re-type them, and I doubt that’ll ever happen. :) But yeah, I do miss writing the stuff sometimes. I still get ideas, usually for big, epic stories that I know I’d never finish. Like, I have this idea about rewriting all of SGA where Weir dies in Eye/Storm. (Because I hate the character, alas. :) ) That’s fun to think about, but I doubt I’d ever sit and actually write it.

Totally understand about not wanting to transcribe that stuff.  It’s very cool, though, since ‘zines aren’t around anymore and are basically the birthplace of modern fanfics.  And I understand about the long-fic ideas, too.  I’m currently in the middle of writing one and it’s not that easy!  But if you ever do feel the inspiration, please let me know.  We have a lot of great fic cheerleaders for SGA here on Tumblr, so you won’t be writing it for a void :)

anonymous asked:

Have you seen the new promo with Clarke + Memori in the mansion kitchen? It felt sooo weird to see them in a place like that but all I could think about was how much I want bellamy to be there too omg. It just made me think about the life Bellamy and Clarke could never have. Bellamy cooking dinner with Clarke dancing. around the kitchen. Alas. Do you think B or C ever think about the kind of lives they're missing out on or are they too busy saving the world?

It did feel weird, but not in a bad way. I think moments like that are reinvigorating and essential in a story so steeped in death; they show that when humans are given a modicum of peace and calm, they generally return to the same basic pleasures, no matter what world they’re in. Cooking, dancing, hanging shit on each other. The freedom to indulge in simple, small luxuries is kind of an incredible thing when you think about it. It’s one of the cornerstones you build happiness on. I know that at some point in the near future Emori is going to be begging Murphy to survive and he will be screaming at Clarke because that’s the way gravity pulls in their world, but I still find it really hopeful that we got to see even this tiny moment of normalcy. I know Memori fancy themselves all dark and twisty but they are such a bright spot on the show; their survivalist rhetoric has evolved from something resembling nihilism to something that compels them to find joy in each other even while the world bursts into flames. I think it’s telling that Murphy, given a kitchen and a cookbook and his cute Grounder girlfriend, is friendly to Clarke when she arrives despite the fact that Clarke’s arrival usually spells trouble in his eyes.

Anyway. Memori tangent. Honestly, I don’t think Bellamy or Clarke have much of a concept of a ‘life they’re missing out on’ the same way that the audience do; the only point of reference for life that they have is what they had on the Ark, which was not a whole lot better. Murphy cooking, for example – Clarke talks about it less like he’s picked up a household skill and more like he’s managed to master the piano. I doubt cooking was ever a thing on the Ark – they ate for nutrition, not for taste.

They miss not being at war – and I think they miss what little innocence they had – but they’re not dreaming of dancing in a kitchen together so much as they’re dreaming of not being afraid. Part of that is probably a coping mechanism – if you think too hard about what you’re fighting for (and still might never get), it can stop being hopeful and start being terrifying. Part of it is the fact that they are genuinely all-consumingly busy with saving the world.

I am very curious to see what Bellamy and Clarke would be like during peacetime. After the world is saved. Because I don’t know if they’d quite know what to do with themselves.

tagged by @blackratchet :)

Nicknames: I always wanted a cool nickname, but alas, I’m pretty much just Holly. Very ocassionally Hol. A family friend (non-related ‘aunt’) used to call me Hollybush as a child. I do have a friend at work who calls me Hollington now though! Although I have no idea why…
Zodiac: Scorpio (but I basically NEVER EVER match what is said about them)
Height: eeeeh… I dunno it’s been ages since I checked… something like 5″1?
Last thing I Googled: so I had NO IDEA how to check my google history - so as of right now the last thing I googled was ‘how to check google history’ :p turns out before that it was checking when the clocks change next in the UK
Song stuck in my head: Hurricane by Halsey
Last movie I watched: Logan (SURPRISINGLY EMOTIONAL)
What am I wearing right now: black PJ top with black and white patterned trousers and… penguin slippers (uuuh, fandom absolutely does not own my clothing choices, nope…)
What do I post: Gotham, Supernatural and cats, primarily
Why did I choose my URL: my name’s Holly, I’m small and ‘Leaf’ or ‘Hollyleaf’ was the nickname I always wanted but never got :p also I’ve used this name online for well over 10 years now, I feel like it would be a betrayal to change it at this point!
Religious or spiritual: Nah. Even when I was I… kinda wasn’t. Though I’m not scientific either. I just don’t really think about it tbh.
Fave colour: Orange, orange/brown. Though not so much to wear.
Avg hours of sleep: probably about 7, though I can usually get by on 6 for a night or two.
Lucky number: 7
Favourite character: what, like, of all time from every piece of fiction in my life? because that’s impossible! …except actually, shh, it’s probably Cas :p but really, I have SO MANY favs! key ones =

Vislor Turlough, Donna Noble, Five - Doctor Who

Arnold Rimmer - Red Dwarf

Jonathan, Warren and Andrew - Buffy

Ray Vecchio - Due South

Castiel, Charlie Bradbury, Balthazar - Supernatural

and ofc, Edward Nygma, Oswald Cobblepot, Barbara Kean - Gotham

How many blankets i sleep with: just the one duvet, except in the summer when I sometimes dig out a single thin blanket or don’t use one at all - I get hot SUPER EASILY
Dream job: not having one, so I can spend all my time on my hobbies instead :p

there wasn’t a rule included, but @blackratchet tagged 5 people, which is a small number, so I’ll tag -

@sunlitroom @millicentcordelia @five-p-m @neven-ebrez @athenaworshippingatheist

play, or not - as you wish!

Please Forgive Me

Sweetheart, you were the most beautiful man
I had ever seen, and that is why I flew halfway
Across the country to be your lady. You gave
Me stability when I had none: You were the 
Only man who wanted to be my companion.
You were my very best friend, and you are
The most gorgeous, most compassionate
Man I have ever met to this day. I often
Try not to think of you because I do not
Know what happened to you, but I know
It was my fault. That jealous lover of
Mine probably got to you, and I may
Never know comfort until I know the
Truth: Alas, I hope you know how
Special you are to meI hope
You are happy, wherever you
May be. I hope you met an
Awesome lady to bake
You all the cakes and
Just chill because
I was too young;
I ruined us for
What? Not
A damn

ml fic: love to watch him walk away

Marinette was never going to talk about Chat Noir again. Unless she was in costume and there was an akuma who needed to be dealt with, she would never again let the name pass her lips. 


She pressed her hands to her now-scarlet cheeks, wishing they were still cool from the outside winds. Alas, they were not; if nothing else, they were making her face redder. She settled for letting her forehead drop to her desk. Gently, so that the teacher wouldn’t scold her.

“I want to die,” she moaned, words garbled by the desk surface.

Alya being Alya, of course, understood perfectly.

“I don’t think he heard us,” she said, apologetic, which was appropriate, for loathe as Marinette was to point fingers, this was very much Alya’s fault.

He did, Marinette thought furiously, peeking from under her bangs to Adrien’s pink-tinged neck. Even though he laughed off his fall with grace, he looks stiffer than usual, and he is very definitely absolutely not looking at them.

Marinette gave an inaudible whimper.

Of all the embarrassing comments he could have potentially overhead—she can still see him sprawled out on the floor, eyes wide, face flushed pink and looking right at her.

God, he must think that she is such a pervert.

“I am never going to talk in public again.” she muttered under her breath. Her skin was on fire. “I will have to become a mime. Maybe Mylene’s dad will take me on as an apprentice.”

“It wasn’t that bad,” said Alya, her cadence comforting. “Lots of people talk about superhero crushes; it’s no big deal.”

“But I don’t have a crush on him!” Marinette nearly wailed, but that would have attracted even more attention than Adrien had by falling over in his chair. “I was just—just making an observation!”

Alya patted her on the head. “Of course you were.”

“I was!” said Marinette, indignant, blushing fiercely. “And I’m not the only one who says it! Alix said it too!”


Alya was clearly restraining amused laughter. Briefly, Marinette entertained the notion of petty revenge. Maybe give her a day-old croissant instead of a fresh one.

No, she couldn’t.

But still.

Of all of the comments he could have overheard…

“I’m surprised that you had a chance to notice that about Chat Noir,” said Alya, also in a whisper, and apparently determined despite Marinette’s dramatics to continue this conversation. “Y’know, considering you-know-who.”

“How could I not notice?” Marinette demanded, her whisper in a decibel that probably only dogs could hear. Well, and Alya, who just understood. “He struts around all the time. And-and he has a nice body and it’s a very tight suit!”

A loud clattering made both girls look up. Adrien, apparently, had dropped his pencil. When he leaned over to retrieve it, they could very clearly see that his blush had deepened to a crimson that rivaled Ladybug’s bodysuit.

“I think he heard again,” said Alya, sheepish.

Marinette wondered if she could just melt into the floor.

author’s notes: if you want to know what Marinette said, it’s all in the title :)

whenever i see some people accusing csers of having terrible taste in ships for shipping captain swan, i want to cackle for fucking ever because wow we actually have great fucking taste, alright

it’s a relationship based on mutual trust, respect, tons of love and, ofc, a fuckton of chemistry (esp sexual) (never hurts, ya know) (but i digress)

they treat each other as EQUALS

actually not that usual in most m/f ships, lbh, or ships, in general

ever since my dad found out that the quote from Hamlet was NOT ‘Alas poor Yorick, I knew him well’ but in actual fact ‘Alas poor Yorick. I knew him, Horatio’ he now just puts Horatio into every quote:

  • “It is a truth universally acknowledged, Horatio, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.”
  • “It is a far, far better thing that I do, Horatio, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.”

i have never wanted to rescue a ship and a show from its own dumbass writers more than i want to rescue ichabbie and sleepy hollow