emma, how do i deal with friends who only take advantage over me in group projects? they're good friends but they dont seem to know how much burden they put on me. and it comes to the point where it really stresses me when i come home after class only to find out that they're either sleeping or out with their boyfriend.
Hey there. Honestly, friends that do that are really shitty, it isn’t fair at all. I think as tough as it can be you need to be strong and direct. When you start a project, it is worth clarifying everyone’s role and due dates. Perhaps it is worth having a group or message chat where you can just talk about the work and not social stuff. I think you need to try to limit yourself taking over when you shouldn’t. It is difficult when you don’t want things to go undone but you need to teach people a lesson. Maybe you should tell small white lies when they ask you to do things. It isn’t your responsibility to do someone else’s work because they’re putting other things about their school/university work. Perhaps it is worth doing a checklist or something so if things aren’t getting done, you know whose fault it is and can either show the marker or make them realise they’re letting everyone down. Another option is trying to organise a group meeting - perhaps on a weekend you can meet up, do 3-4 hours or working and then do something sociable afterwards. That way you can watch everyone and make sure they’re doing what they need too xx