i need to watch season 1 again

anonymous asked:

When Dean is caught by the djinn (ep 2x20 What Is And What Should Never Be), his djinn dream is this perfect little world where he's living a normal life and his Mom is alive but in that world, John is dead. I wanted to hear your thoughts on this :)

Hi!

It’s been ages since I watched this one. argh, I have focused more on the later seasons so far and I really need to go back and rewatch and analyse 1-5 but here goes…

The main gist of the episode for me was what was offered to him and the fact that he rejected it:

Originally posted by dustydreamsanddirtyscars

The thing was, it wasn’t a perfect world. 

It goes again for me deep into the 2 levels of Dean, the top layer which is selfless and about putting others before him, portraying himself as someone who others would want to spend time with and be proud of and the underneath layer which is all about what he wants and desires himself, his selfish side.

I use selfish here NOT in a derogatory way but just to emphasise that it is about himself and not others, desires that are just for him.

In the Djinn world he has somehow managed to forego his second layer, his own desires and wants and it is pretty much mostly about the top layers, the others.

Re: John. Sam is happy with Jess, Mary is happy without John around, which for me just goes to show what he thinks of John’s influence on his own life and how toxic he thinks it would potentially make Mary’s life in the Djinn world and how he wants the John he has known growing up nowhere near the idealistic view of Mary that he has…

Dean HIMSELF in the Djinn dream is a mess. He has a lovely girlfriend and a job as a mechanic, sure, but look below the surface and the things that are most important to him are gone. He doesn’t have a relationship with Sam (when you think about how Sam is his child this is even more heartbreaking) and he still sees himself as poison to his family. This is reinforced again and again throughout the show, e.g. 5x04 where Dean is the poison that means Cas falls and he kills all his friends, 7x05 where he tells Sam that he carries the guilt of the world on his shoulders, the deaths of Kevin, Charlie and Benny of course and then the near death of Cas in 12x12 which is one of the last I believe examples of this that we will see, where he believes that it is his fault that they died or that Cas is lying there, broken and dying, that he led to this because he changed Cas, he caused Cas to rebel and end up here, dying.

What he WANTS, the second layer, we only really see in the moment giffed above, where Djinn Mary offers him no more pain or fear, just love and comfort. And he REJECTS this, just as he does in real life - to get on with the job, look after Sam and essentially put the top layer of his personality firmly back in control.

The Djinn dream for me basically tells us WHY Dean sublimates his second layer, the selfish part of himself:

Originally posted by ijensenackles

Well, the answer seems to be because he still sees other people as more important than him, that is the crux of this episode, that he sees his selfish side as it as toxic and not of benefit to others and therefore ‘bad’ or ‘dark’ and sublimates it for Sam and Mary. This is the journey he goes through in the Djinn dream, he lies to Sam and pretends that he is a thief, a good for nothing, in order to save them. He puts his own wants and desires, to salvage his relationships with his family to one side, he sublimates them in order to save his family and save people. 

It’s a metaphor for Dean in the whole show in one episode.

It’s why it is so important that since 10x16 he has textually started his journey towards accepting that this selfish side isn’t necessarily bad or toxic / poison to others, where Mary’s behaviour in season 12 causes him to say that he deserves better, he deserves more…

Originally posted by mishacolins

Leading to 12x12 of course, a reconciliation which is so important as it is SO much stronger than a rejection re: his 2 sides and then Crowley’s death as metaphorically symbolising his letting go of perceiving this selfish side and his desires as dark and toxic.

John and Crowley have a large impact on his ‘dark’ side story and it is crucial that he is shrugging off the ghost of his father and that Crowley reconciled himself and then died.

Watching these key episodes now after season 12 is amazing, to see the development and to truly understand the levels and purpose behind performing!Dean that we saw in the past… Dabb giving us all the mirrors and circular narrative :D

I’m Not Worth It

Characters: Dean x Reader 

Word Count: 1.2k

Warnings: Angst, fluff, Language

A/N: This is set in the episode Faith from season 1. I just recently watched it again and felt the need to write this. I’m always wanting to comfort Dean when he feels like he isn’t worth a damn I want him to know he is. So I wrote this. I also worked it in for @ravengirl94‘s 1.5k writing challange. You will find the line “Why don’t you come over here and make me, in the fic. Hope you like it girl. And congrats on your milestone. :D The gif was submitted by the lovely @winchester-writes. She knows how to send the ones that will eventually inspire a story. :) 

Keep reading

youtube

Still alive!! Finally finished the 4th installment for Race To the Edge with another one of my highlight videos for each season. Links to others:

#1) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p9iLAis5Opc

#2) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-qjYATXAmA

#3) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JsZlvnv9Qco

This was supposed to be for you, @tarched for your B-day…but uh….I am most embarrassingly late for that *Sorry creative crisis* So this will simply be a dedication buddy. I know how much you liked this song from theFatRat off YT. (Plus it had the sincerity needed for the intimate Hiccstrid moments along with a random instrumental section for the highlights.) Hope you enjoy this messy compilation! (Again, not one of my better works but its supposed to be simple/raw/basic so I can make it quickly. *rolls eyes*)

Thank you again Tarch for being there for me when I needed you! Keep shining my friend…YOU’RE THE BEST!!  :)

So im gonna give scene analysis a go because i havent loved an episode this much all season.

So here it goes.

  • Killian quite literally running down hill. Such a good representation of his arc. We got so much angst and this episode is going to be the come down to all of it. The settling. 
  • And just like his past created the the beginning of the climb to this story/arc, it’s interesting that in the scene where he is going downhill it is literally because he’s being chased by what could be seen as symbols of his past. Who he was in the past. (Referring to the lost boys).
  • Lol I love the whole buried Rum line. Very Captain Jack Sparrow-esque
  • I got someone waiting for me at home. The show IS NOT ACCIDENTALLY THROWING OUT THIS TERM A LOT. It’s done with absolute intention. 
  • I don’t know if we will ever get real backstory on Killian and Tiger Lily but his little smirk he has upon saying her name and the era of confidence has me thinking it isn’t anywhere near as bad as everyone speculated.
  • Ah and there’s Captain Floor again. I gotta say they really do love messing with this man’s neck.
  • Nice reference to the fact that Hook is family.
  • I also dig Charming saying that this is REGINA’S curse. He didn’t differentiate in this moment.
  • Ugh the Snowing theme song always chokes me up. I love that there Love is enough to snap her out of this. Always a sucker for TL moments.
  • IT still makes me so giddy that these are real life husband and wife being all romantic on my screen.
  • Okay BF is stunning. Like damn.
  • I laugh at the idea that had Charming not said Emma’s name Rumple could still be living mindlessly in the 21st century Storybrooke Regina made. 
  • Ahh Charms saying “I know Hook is out there doing the same for you,” is so important because she needed to hear it and I think Charms knew that. You can see the instant relief in her face as she embraces him. I think it both calmed her and it also solidified that he wasn’t as mad anymore as maybe she was worried he was.
  • “Skull Rock” nice throw back to the animated version!
  • Killian’s anger and desperate need at having to get back to Emma, the woman he loves, will always get me in the feels.
  • I love that fate comes into play when it means creating the chance to save someone you love. There is so many great moments around this idea, this episode. We have Snowing later sacrificing themselves so Emma can get Killian. Which by fates hands will connect her with the weapon she needs to stop the BF. We also see this same fate come into play when Killian ends up in Neverland with the woman (tiger lily) who has the needed weapon. It’s all connected my friends. 
  • 20:1, “well I feel sorry for those lads, they don’t stand a chance.” Ah that pirate swag. 
  • I love that the FB all share some significance to season 1. I mean the scene where Regina sends Archie and Pongo to the mines is very reminiscent of season 1. It makes you wonder how much of these moments influenced those moments.
  • The field of flowers. Hmm well if Regina’s curse and season 1 evilness = 1 found pink flower. And now we’re seeing hundreds. She must really be a big big bad huh?
  • “NO mother should have to watch their child die,” hmm me thinks someone with a mom on the show might experience just that. SPOILER: my thoughts are Emma but I think she’ll be brought back. 
  • Killian Jones the host of all current hope speeches.
  • And there he goes again, risking himself to ensure his TL get’s what she needs to live. 
  • A single flower. A symbol that there is always hope. There is always something there that will get you through.
  • Okay so the scene with Snowing and young emma is really heart breaking. To me it’s not just a conversation of right vs. wrong. But a moment of just decision making. A hard one. And that’s why it was so important to have both sides of it. One side represented by Charms the other by Snow. It was the same conversation the audience would be having. So it fit well. But this scene was also meant to contrast what is coming next. It was also really nice to see that second chances run in romances. Ayyyee. That rhymed. But seriously Snowing and Captain Swan really do parallel the crap out of each other. The second good byes, the second reunions. Sometimes things happen more than once before they stick. 
  • And his fricken shadow caressed her face and im dead on the floor. I love that it kind of parallels the scene where Charms touched Snows hand and it was enough to just catapult a shift in emotion. 
  • And here we have the scene the FB’s were built for. One of them at least. Snow giving Emma the potion to bring back her love. TO have that happiness. To not have to wait. To do something for herself. EVERYTHING in contrast to what was done when they saw her through that door earlier, comes down to this moment. Snow is making the other choice. And it will pay off.
  • My understanding of that potion by the way, is that the one seeking their true love has to use it. So Im under the impression that everyone who will be mad at Emma for using it cant really be mad anyways? Because Snow has already passed out before she has a chance to use it. 
  • Also can we talk about how Snow knows that to win this battle. To fight this big fight, Killian has to be there. He’s part of what matters most to her and without that she wont be at her strongest. In a way Snow is once again doing what’s right by the people. She’s not only giving her daughter a chance but by letting her get Killian back and allowing her to have that person by her side for that fight, she is also potentially saving the town. 
  • Everything was just so perfect in that second that he saw her face. He was both scared and surprised and relieved at the same time that he saw her. And then not a second later he is warning Tiger Lily to run and again thinking about those other than himself. Here comes the full circle arc guys. I can feel it. 
  • Tiger Lily’s little happy smirk makes me happy. 
  • ALSO can we talk about how the last time they were in Neverland together everything was different. He felt like an orphan and had no family. Emma felt like an orphan. She was running away from him. He was declaring that he would one day win her heart because she’d WANT HIM. And now we have them both, with their families and each other, no where near alone and he has won her heart and she is running towards him and not only does she WANT HIM SHE AGREES TO SPEND ETERNITY WITH HIM BECAUSE SHE NEEDS HIM. THEY NEED EACH OTHER!! *loud screaching*
  • .2 seconds. Count with me. .2 seconds until Killian apologizes and gets right back to where he left off. This is so vital. So important. He’s tired of waiting. He wants to be different and he knows he is. He doesn’t want to waste time thinking about himself. He wants to get that truth of his and that apology out there because that’s what he’s been dying to say to her this entire time. Redemption arc! Redemption arc! You can even see Emma in my mind, taken a bit by surprise. He’s hurting and he doesn’t care. He needs to talk to her and clear the air. This is a clear showcasing of what he’s learned and what he finds important and Emma sees that.
  • He also owns up to the fact that he considered running away. He owns it. He didn’t have to but he did.
  •  The change off is so so good here. Emma’s line of “lets go get you cleaned off” showing where her concern in this moment lies. On his wellbeing. On his feeling whole. And his reluctance because he needs her to know that he loves her. That he wants to marry her. That she will never ever ever be alone and need to worry about him leaving ever again because he will always be with her by her side. (His concerns lying on her wellbeing, and her feeling whole).
  • Second proposal. SECOND FRICKING PROPOSAL. AND IM UGLY CRYING. DEAD AND ALIVE AT THE SAME TIME. My god. The single tear. The fact that they both had a chance to now ask each other. 
  • They’re both so vulnerable and delicate and AWARE of the stakes of life here. And it just guts me in the best kind of way. 
  • MARK MY MAN. THAT MUSIC THOOOOOOOOO AH.
  • And again .2 seconds later he wants to know where her parents are because homeboy is not playing. He’s not messing things up this time. He knows who is important to him and how keeping them means being honest with them and he needs to talk to his bro before anything else. And make sure that the full truth is out there and that he is 100 percent the man he needs and wants and knows he can be and REDEMPTION ARC! REDEMPTION ARC!
  • Ah holding hands while walking to Emma’s parents. 
  • .2 seconds my friends. This is what i’m talking about the closing of a redemption arc. He is wasting no time owning up to everything, making amends for everything. Not only is Killian a vital part in breaking the curse. But he is the first step in making it happen. He is using his ACTIONS in CURRENT TIME to make amends for his ACTIONS of the PAST. All this is on purpose and it’s what makes this such a good redemption arc. I mean seriously who does a redemption arc better than Killian mother f’n Jones. 
  • I loved Killian and Emma’s little smile at Leroy. Especially sense they have a spotted past with him haha.
  • Idk why that little look on Emma and Killian’s face gets me. The one right after Granny takes a sip. It’s like Emma is seeing what he waiting until she was 28 to find her parents really did. It brought these people together. It made this group. These friendships. It was worth something. And Killian is just looking like he is desperately waiting for his bro to resurface. He needs the chance to Look David in the face and own what he did and make sure he knows that he is sorry. 
  • ^^ Point: Colin and Jen are fantastic fricken actors. I will follow their careers until i’m probs dead.
  • I love the whole Season 1 feeling of Snow waking up, only now they are next to each other. Im a sucka for some parallels. 
  • And here’s another contrast point to the FB. This moment. Where they wake up and see what everyone has done for them is to show Snowing and the audience that when you help others they will return the favor. It won’t go unnoticed. 
  • Emma and Killian look so regal laying there haha.
  • Also David rushing to his daughter has my eyes rushing with tears ya feel.
  • Anyone else get a little father daughter feeling when Emma woke up at Charms touch. I could imagine him waking her up for school in the morning as a little girl when I watched this.
  • And CHARMS HAND REACHES TO HELP KILLIAN UP AND IM DEAD. IM ABSOLUTELY DEAD. Like the symbolism. Killian is still down because Charming needs to know how he feels. How he’s sorry. And now Charming is lifting him up and they are eye to eye and here it comes. The man who he inadvertently hurt is the man helping him to his feet. Coming to his hand and his rescue. And Killian is given the chance to finally say what needs to be said and HE TAKES IT. OF COURSE HE DOES. 
  • Can I also holla at the parallel shot (like literally parallel) of Emma and Snow looking at each other right next to Killian and David looking at each other. The newly engaged and the parents. In an actual parallel. I mean can you scream symbolism because I can “SYMBOLISMMM!”
  • Can I also point out that Killian is still scared. It’s not going to hinder him from being the good man we know he is. But he is scared. He tells David that he guesses “Emma didn’t tell [him his] secret.” And this line doesn’t have anything to do with Emma it has to do with Killian thinking there is no way Charms would help him to his feet and ensure his safety if he knew. Because how could he be forgiven so fast. How could something he was so ashamed of and so terrified of acknowledging and scared of knowing yet alone saying be forgiven. This is the bow on the top of a very important package. 
  • I love everything about this scene. Charming saying that Hook is a changed man. Ensuring not only him but the audience. Charming had a lesson this episode about the past. He knows that once was is far away from what now is. And the way he looks at Emma as he says Hook has changed. Ensuring his daughter that all is well. That he is still supporting their marriage and love and happiness and Emma’s knowing look. That look that says “these are my parents and I love them. I love who they are.” Is the best. And i’m in tears again.
  • “No matter what she does you will not face her alone.” This is so important. Because let’s be honest. Of course Emma is scared of the battle. But what has always scared her more than some big bad has been who will be there by her side when this darkness comes (Whether its the darkness of being an orphan or a literal dark one). Emma has her family. She has come full circle too. She isn’t alone and never will be again. 
  • AH Gideon kept a flower alive. You go my dude.
  • Can we also talk about the contrast in family dynamics. Rumples whole family is a mixture of people chosing to love each other and being forced to obey each other in some weird representation of false love. Meanwhile the charms-mills-swan-jones/town is having one big huge family moment. In which people are actively choosing, with their hearts, to be a part of this family that was built out of love and respect and forgiveness and sacrifice. They contrasts are on purpose. And it’s glorious.

Honestly this episode was so good. This is long because I had many feelings. Sorry not sorry. haha. 

Im ded.

Say You Won't Let Go (Oswald Cobblepot x Reader) - Fluff/Smut One Shot

Originally posted by mr-april

@oswald-cobblepot-is-my-addiction asked for something sweet with Oswald. I hope you’ll like it, sweetheart. Always remember, you’re worth every happiness and love in the world, my dear friend.

Summary: You and Oswald have feelings for each other, but never know how the other feels. One day, Oswald comforts you, and those feelings are revealed.

- Set sometime before season 1 -

Tags: @aya-fay @cnygma @cartoonobsessionsyndrome @theamazing-bouncingferret @sir-creepy @midnightschemesanddreams @socktrollqueen

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Smut (nothing too explicit), Fingering, Reader on Top.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

ive rly been wanting to watch house for a while but im scared. any advice?

FUCK YEAH I DO!!! yes I do. okay mostly i think everything until the end of s4 is actually great and you should watch it all. from then on only watch the gay eps and then s8 only watch the finale arc but consider it an evil au that doesn’t exist.

okay but luckily joolia asked me what the gay episodes were a while ago and i started to make a list but then i couldn’t go on because i could face neither my own feelings nor season 8. an abridged Gay Guide under the cut.

Keep reading

Let's talk about the CW

The Secret Circle - cancelled even though it had high ratings because of a fear that a f/f ship might have developed

Reign- had Kenna wake up handcuffed to the dead body of a girl she just had sex with the night before(to please the king)

Arrow- Sara, how many times has that girl died? (Seriously I stopped watching after season 1 so I wouldn’t know)

Jane The Virgin- Rose murdered by her step mom after visiting her female lover in the hospital to make sure she was ok and ask to run away with her

100- Lexa(do I even need to talk about this one)

The vampire diaries- two IMMORTAL sapphic women killed in the same episode (again haven’t watched the show in like forever so I wouldn’t truly know how they died)

anonymous asked:

Ok, sorry but I need to tell this to someone, but: I was rewatching the 4ep of the first season, when Pidge is found in Iverson's office and he tells the other officer to "escort miss Holt to her accomodation" which means that she was a student there, so I don't think she can be that much younger that the others. I feel like a lot of people just fly over that bit

Is this legit bc I deadass haven’t noticed this but then again it’s been a long time since I watched season 1

Review

Today I received the Kagehina Fanbook (PDF) ‘Closer’ by @fantakoi. I only just started watching Haikyuu!! some days ago, and I still haven’t gotten past Episode 10 of Season 1. I was a bit worried that the fanbook might contain spoilers, but it doesn’t.

(art by @fantakoi)

It has everything a good love story needs! The characters’ personalities are portrayed exactly like they are in the Anime~ It’s perfect *-* (I could say so much more but I don’t want to spoil anything)

I love your art so much, and if you ever decided to make another fanbook like this, I’d buy it again for sure!

Thanks for making me smile on such a gloomy day <3

(I also liked the art of the guest artists very much!)

Arrow Season 5 finale and overall season thoughts

I have not enjoyed this season or the finale, sure there were some moments that I liked but overall this entire season was forgettable. Since I’ve got a few minutes free this morning I thought I’d list some thoughts.

To start I guess I feel like I might have missed something because the entertainment journalists and most people on my twitter and tumblr time lines were really enjoying last night. And I, well I’m left feeling empty, unsatisfied, and underwhelmed.

I guess Oliver and Felicity are back together. So 5x20 was there to wrap up their break-up and move them forward. And that one little line from Felicity during the birthday party showed they are back together. But I guess even though earlier this year I thought the little bits I figured the show would throw to us would be enough for me, it wasn’t, AT ALL. I can’t even articulate what I’m not satisfied with I just feel unhappy with how that whole storyline wrapped up. But like with so many things on this show I’ll make my peace with it and move on. But I guess at least we got a season finale kiss in the suit in good lighting, so that’s something.

There were too many people in this episode so no one really did anything. All this OTA being front and center and important was such bullshit. Seriously Felicity was there to have a crammed in “meaningful” convo with Thea and Samantha and ????? She announced that the whole island was rigged to blow for the audience but did nothing else. Diggle, oh my god. He did nothing, he was just there. If he had a meaningful purpose it was such a quick scene that I forgot it already.

I was really irritated with the whole Oliver telling Thea that she and Curtis (of all people) and Malcolm (who has betrayed them all so many times) needed to protect and get Felicity and Samantha to safety. That made me so mad, like lets reduce Oliver’s love and baby mama to damsels that need protecting well f&ck that.

That Nyssa and Talia fight was anti-climatic and over too fast. I was expecting a lot more out of Talia since they introduced her this season. Now that was a sister conflict storyline that had potential but as usual with Arrow, they introduced way more story than they could adequately tell.

Slade….sigh. I don’t like Slade, I’ve never liked Slade. Slade killed Moira in front of Oliver and Thea. I don’t give a single shit that the miracuru is out of his system and he is no longer mentally unstable and under the influence of drugs. HE KILLED OLIVER AND THEA’S MOTHER IN FRONT OF THEM. HE STABBED HER THROUGH THE HEART WITH A SWORD! UGH! I also see how the show just slid Slade in to give the words of wisdom to Oliver about survivors guilt and forgiving himself that in any other episode would have been Diggle’s to give. Just another way to sideline Diggle so we can get a comic book character moment.

Rene and Curtis did nothing, couple line of exposition and that’s it. Lance was there to call Dinah Bl@ck C@nary. Dinah was there to have a scream fight with Bl@ck Siren. I get it story-wise, everyone Oliver cares for needed to be on that island so Chase could continue to taunt Oliver with everyone you love will always suffer because of you, blah, blah, blah. And for that “emotional” cliffhanger of they are all dead when the island explodes.

Why was Digger Harkness in this episode? Evelyn was so pointless. I don’t get why Bl@ck Siren was there at all. Sure help Chase out as a thank you by capturing everyone in Star City, but why continue on to Lian Yu?

Malcolm, sigh, I guess I’m glad he’s finally dead, but what a way to go. So let me get this straight, he sacrificed himself for Thea. The same Thea he drugged and had her kill Sara so Ra’s wouldn’t go after him and led to Thea being stabbed and almost dying. Then he wouldn’t give up the league to get the cure for the bloodlust. But that death was off screen, so while I think he might actually be dead for real, I also would not be surprised if he were to pop back up alive in season 8 or 9 if Arrow goes that long.

Now the kid, William. Look I’m a mother, I have 2 kids who are 10 and 8. I’m also the child of divorced parents whose dad popped in and out her life throughout her childhood. This whole finale revolved around Oliver trying to find and save his son. Intellectually I get it, but emotionally I was not connected to this story at all. Look I know Oliver supposedly bonded with the kid in season 4 when he was leaving his paralyzed fiance to visit his son, who didn’t know he was his son. But dammit, if the writers knew that they were going to base the entire finale on fathers and sons (hell the whole season really) then it would have been way more emotionally satisfying for me if I had seen Oliver and William interacting and bonding this season. I’m also mildly irked that we never got to see William’s reaction to finding out that Oliver (his mom’s friend who visited with him a few times last year) is his father and his father is the Green Arrow. Sighing again. Once again this whole child story is just used for plot and has no emotional resonance.

Overall season thoughts.

It’s utterly forgettable. There are maybe 2 episodes I would rewatch entirely and maybe 3 or so more I’d watch parts of.

Sometimes I wonder why I’m still watching this show. I haven’t really enjoyed it since season 4a. I guess because every time I think I’m done the writers manage a moment of brilliance and I’m sucked back in.

Billy had no purpose to Felicity’s story. He was there for Oliver’s manpain not for Felicity.

Susan, I’m sighing again. That storyline went no where and was just unceremoniously dropped.

I know some people are happy with Felicity’s arc this season. But it was too little for me. She was sidelined too much this season. While I know she got a lot of screen time a lot of it was about other people’s emotional journeys, technical expertise, and exposition. I’ve given up thinking that she will ever get an in-depth story. I can hope for Smoak Tech next season but I’m not holding my breath.

Oliver, is this no killing thing going to actually stick for real this time? Because I thought it had previously, he spared Slade, but then he killed Ra’s and Damien and was back to killing again at the beginning of this season. I just feel like we constantly retread the same stories over and over with Oliver and I’m just tired of it. Find something new writers. But I don’t think they are capable of finding new emotional arcs for Oliver because once again it sounds like season 6 is a retread of a story already told. But I know it’s early and something had to be announced at upfronts.

I was not really satisfied with the wrap up of the flashbacks. I figured Kovar would have fought with and delayed Oliver just enough to have him miss the boat and he’d be stuck on the island for a couple of months. They really screwed up cutting flashback Oliver’s hair in season 4. If he’d never cut his hair over 5 years and missed the boat Anatoli sent for him that would explain the hair and beard. A wig and fake beard was so ridiculous. But whatever at least the flashbacks (my least favorite part of the show) are finally over.

Sighing once again. I just  re-read this post and I feel like I’ve done nothing but complain. But I wasn’t satisfied with this episode or this season and I needed a way to get my feelings out. So thanks anyone who made it all the way through this post. I’ll probably still follow along with summer hiatus speculations and be back in the fall. But nothing in the finale made me excited to watch next season.

I’m rarely invested in more than 1-3 shows at a time and Arrow has been the only show I watch consistently for the the past 2 years. So I really hope something comes out over the summer or at SDCC to make me want to return, otherwise I might be searching for a new show to watch.

Tagging some friends (by the way thanks for the good thoughts and wishes sent my way) @almondblossomme @marytagus @laurabelle2930 @hope-for-olicity @nalla-madness @green-arrows-of-karamel @wildirish23 @olicity-i-believe-in-you

Breathe

I know tonight’s episode was disappointing to say the least. At least to everyone hoping this was gonna be a good sign. I kind of knew it wasn’t.

Okay first let me start in the beginning. People were saying why did they make it awkward? I don’t know about you guys, but bumping into an ex isn’t a fun pleasure. Especially with an ex you still have feelings for. It’s obvious that Antonio and Sylvie’s relationship is far from over. Isn’t that what we wanted? Of course Antonio wasn’t gonna say ‘I miss you’ nor Sylvie. Sadly, although it is far from over, they are both two very stubborn individuals (may be why they connect the way they do). Like I say time and time again, there is a reason why they can’t get back together right now, it is too much of a mess right now. It’ll take too much time and that’s just something Justice can’t focus on. They focus too much on cases, like they should, because although Brettonio has a big fanbase, they have to built Justice to gain more viewers. Sorry to say, focusing too much on Antonio or his relationship would lose viewers more than gain it. We know Antonio, we love him, so focusing too much on him can be more harmful than good. Besides, if Justice was on season 2 or 3, then they would already have a loyal fanbase like Fire and PD. They could do whatever they want and they know they’ll be fine. But with a new show, they can’t do it. I would rather keep their relationship on fire. If they were at a good place then yeah, bring it to Justice. But this episode was never supposed to bring hope to Brettonio. Derek isn’t done messing with us unfortunately.

Which brings me to this. What Antonio said about Laura. Does this surprise you? It doesn’t to me. I may seem silly and less as a Brettonio fan for saying this, but I truly loved Antonio and Laura. I fell in love with them when Diego was kidnapped. The emotions they portrayed were amazing. They were a family. And come on, they will always be a family. He’s right in the sense that he will always feel that way about Laura because of the kids, because of the family. He’s a man that loves family so yeah, it makes sense. You guys need to understand that Antonio and Laura didn’t get divorced because they fell out of love. Actually it was quite the opposite. It was because Laura loved Antonio so much that she couldn’t watch him get shot anymore. It’s why the divorce was so horrible because the love was still there. Antonio did not want to divorce Laura, and if you guys think even for a second he did, please, I say this with love, rewatch Chicago PD season 1 again. Because you missed the important parts of Antonio.  Honestly, I think it’s why I fell in love with Brettonio because Sylvie made Antonio happy again. Please don’t think what he said to Stone about Laura was Antonio’s way of saying he wanted her back. Cause if you think that, you’re nuts (again, I say with love). That’s why they say be careful who you have kids with because you’re connected to them for life. Antonio and Laura were married, brought two kids in their marriage and built a life with them. Who knows exactly what happened in the past they had to deal with together? One thing is for sure, once Antonio  cares for you, he always will. Yes, Laura is a bitch, yes she divorced Antonio, whatever you say is true. I agree. But please don’t sit there and think the writers are pushing them together again. It won’t happen. I think it’s realistic for Antonio to say that, I think it’s realistic for anyone to think those two words ‘what if’. Oh what if? What could it have been? It kills. And I’m sure every person who gets divorced is always battling those two words. Do not think for a second Laura and Antonio will get back together, it ain’t happening. That wasn’t the point of the talk though. The point wasn’t to make us mad or upset, the point was about the case tho?? It was about even through the bad times, the terrible times, through all the crap Laura put him through, there’s still a bond there and love. And not in the sense that he’s in love with Laura, but this is the woman that gave him two kids. Two kids that he loves more than anything. And it was also what he wasn’t saying, that when it came down to it, even with all the pain she caused, and all the times she kept him away from the kids, that if he could protect her, he would. If it was a choice between her going to jail or him, it would be him. Hence why they made the ex-wife risk going to jail for 10 years, knowing that the ex-husband wouldn’t allow that.

This is what I’m talking about that it’s too much of a mess to rush Brettonio on making up. Honestly, I wish they broke up over his job, it would be so much easier sadly. But it’s complicated and as long as the writers tackles Laura, the kids, Antonio thinking he deserves to be alone, just everything, I’d wait for as long as they want us to. Only because once they tackle this, a breakup should never happen again. Although, I don’t understand why Sylvie was on Justice when literally any paramedic could have done what she did? I am disappointed that we didn’t see the breakup from his POV. But I can live with it if this is building up towards something.

Things that I need to do:

1. Re-watch all of Yuri on Ice

2. Re-watch all of Yuri on Ice again

3. and again

4. and again

5. and again

6. maybe take a break.

7. Re-watch it again: re experience my feelings, and proceed to cry even more.

8. Watch season 2

Why doesn't Wolfgang help Kala?

I’ve been re-watching the show and noticed that in season 1 Kala needed help in the temple twice - once when her father-in-law was attacked and Kala kept calling for help, but no on came from her cluster to help her- NOT EVEN WOLFGANG! The second time was after her father-in-law was attacked and Will come to her rescue but NOT WOLFGANG! In season 2 - Kala again needed help while her visit to the temple.. and we can see that Nomi can feel what was going on, but again no one.. I say NO ONE came to her rescue.. NOT EVEN WOLFGANG!
I’m not sure why did the writers not write about Wolfgang helping Kala? I see that Kala is always standing by Wolfgang’s side- when he was in trouble at Steiner’s house, Kala made a bomb out of spices, when Felix was in the hospital- Kala came to the hospital to support him. In season 2 - Kala comes to Wolfgang’s rescue several times- at the restaurant, when he was hiding from Lila and Fauchs, when he got taken by Whispers.
I ask why, why doesn’t Wolfgang come to help Kala? I feel like love on Kala’s end is much stronger than it is on Wolfgang’s end! Kala doesn’t realize how much she loves Wolfgang❣️❣️❣️

Girls’ Guide To Getting Over Guys:
1.) Think of guy who you need to forget about
2.) Sign up for/log into Netflix
3.) Begin to watch a show with at least 8 seasons - I recommend Supernatural
4.) Become emotionally invested in show and binge watch
5.) Fall in love with main character(s) (@jensenackles@mishacollins)
6.) What were we doing again?
—  I’m sorry how cheesy this is but accurate af
Friday Five
  1. I have been sick all week… Summer colds are the worst!
  2. With much time spent on the couch this week, I finally watched the season finale of Shades of Blue, OMG! and finished Season 1 of The Handmaids Tale. If you haven’t watched The Handmaids Tale, you must!
  3. My nails have finally grown back! I had to chop them all off two months ago because I broke three…I’m gonna start doing gel manicures in hopes of making them stronger. We’ll see how long they last. 
  4. Gonna start meal prepping my lunch and breakfasts. I hardly ever eat breakfast and lunch is kinda a struggle when it comes to being really healthy.
  5. Supposed to be record hot this weekend, again! Gonna spend so much needed time by the pool!

I just realized in my Elementary re-watch that in season 1, Joan says she let her license expire after being suspended. Then in season 5, she has it again and it gets stolen. So what I need is a filler episode (aka you writers who are amazing at fanfics cuz I cant write for shitballs) where Joan renews it to go undercover in a case and Sherlock like has to be the janitor or a patient she gets to mess with. or something. 

Pretty pwease?

<3 <3 <3