i need to know who thought of this

Nexon you can’t fool me I know how hair works in a helmet.


honestly I doubt sana is at a point where she would let anyone help her. she’s just so hurt. and tired. and she can’t ask because it’s humiliating, it’s humiliating that years after being bullied, she’s still in that position of loneliness. she grew up, found herself friends that she thought she could protect and thought that perhaps, it was all behind her. she wore her eyeliner, wore black and showed that front to anyone. “I can’t stand anyone who fucks over their friends.” it’s easier to be angry than scared. it’s easier to express vague opinions than to say “please, stand up for me when things will get bad because at some point, they might.” she needs people. she knows she does. so, she protects them. she stands up for them. hoping, desperately hoping that they will do the same without realizing that she needs them to, that she’s vulnerable. they have to think she’s invincible. this is how she survives.

and now ? now, shes alone again. completely alone. they left her, they turned their backs on her and they don’t know how she feels, yes, I think she realizes that but it hurts. because she gave and gave and gave and started lowering her defenses and it still wasn’t enough to be seen, to be noticed. sana is contradictory. she wants to remain invincible because she’s too scared to allow anything else but something in her yearns to be recognized as well. she really felt close to the girl squad. she really, really did.

chris was her first friend. eva was the girl she got to protect from bullying, the one girl she stood up for. noora was someone she could relate to, someone who she felt close to. and vilde was probably like a mirror to her. she was so patient with vilde because she saw in her both herself and the face of ignorance that she fears. when sana said “vilde is the first I would take to war with me”, it meant something. when sana kept gently disproving vildes most ignorant assumptions, it meant something. she protected her from the pepsi max squad, she held her in her arms when she broke, she defended her rights. she saw that girl, that ignorant white girl who was as desperate as her for friends, who carried a similar past and she though she could make her a friend. she thought that her care would be enough to gap that bridge between her and the other norwegian teenagers.

but it wasn’t enough. it ended up just like it began and vilde participated to sana’s humiliation. all her care, all her efforts, all that time and it’s still the same. and she has nothing, now. just anger. just fear and that need, that need to strike back, to appear fearful and invincible and scary once more and never let anyone in again because that’s how she’s safe, that’s how it stops at passive aggressive glares, that’s how she escapes. she doesn’t want to get hurt so now it’s just pride, it’s all she has.

obviously, it wouldn’t be the case if Islam was actually shown on screen and jamilla were here but anyways, yeah. people kept making off-handed comments about the “muslim mafia” around sana and it was just really dumb but not entirely irrelevant. it’s how she frames friendship in her head, because she doesn’t trust white people, she’s scared. she thinks it’s all goods and services, she thinks she’ll protect them, hoping that it’ll be enough to earn their loyalty.

she’s so scared and her systems are failing her, all at once. she can’t reach out. even at the top of her game, she didn’t dare. now, she’s at her worse and all she can do is respond. so when isak said “you’re a good person”, what she heard was the divide between the protector, the friend he saw her as and who she felt she had to be, now. it was a confirmation. a confirmation that she can never show herself, show the fear, the anger. it will never be what they love about her. it will never be what they see.

she’s so certain she cannot be loved for who she is. it’s all a bargain to her.

idk man it breaks my heart

You know, I originally thought that if in my wildest of dreams, Alter actually made Sorey and Mikleo figures, I’d want them in kickass fighting poses, like what they did for Fate T. Harlaown or Black Heart. I thought that would be the best use of their amazing ability to capture the motion in a scene in still vinyl.

But no. They had a better idea instead and came out with this really simple scene of the two of them sitting on the ruined stones of some ancient civilization, Sorey with the Celestial Record in hand, wind gently blowing through their capes, while they give each other the fondest and most beautiful smiles I’ve ever seen on one of their figures.

And I am completely blown away by it, because just like how I thought Zestiria would be the game that could never exist, these two figures with that expression of pure love on their faces is something I thought I’d never get. Just the way they captured the motion of the wind with their capes and the feathers on Sorey’s cloak and earrings, the way the capes are just flowing … like shit, that’s the kind of motion I try to capture with words in my fics and pray I succeed with. And seeing them side by side basically looking at each other like that, excuse me while I jump off a cliff and into a massive ocean of feels because damn I can feel the love coming right off of both of them.

Saying this now, when the pictures of the painted prototypes come out, I’m pretty sure my reaction tags will be nothing but wheezing and incoherent screaming because I can’t remember the last time I was this excited over the release of a set of figures.

anonymous asked:

I'm so excited for the eremika scene but I'm kinda scared for the fandom backlash.... You're probably one of the only blogs who'll keep me sane

I am too anon!
honestly whenever someone asks me if I’m hyped for the scene animated I have one of those uncomfortable laughs because I’m more stressed/worried/scared than hyped 😭

I’ve thought of staying away from tumblr when the time comes but I just know I can’t abandon the fandom because it bothers me to no end to know the antis will fill the tag with their negativity, someone needs to counter that (not me alone ofc but we’ll do it together)
I hope wit studio doesn’t do anything unnecessary and stupid that would make things harder for me
*side eyes ep 24&25* 

I am 20
But I keep saying I feel like 10.
Until today when I spent 2 hours with 20 kids of age 10.

They didn’t know who an adult was.
They didn’t care about how you looked.
They gave the warmth they felt.
They loved imitating adults.
They wanted the approval of the adults they liked.
They didn’t know the spelling of improv; they weren’t scared to ask.

Sure, I don’t know who an adult is because I’m struggling to be one and there are words that I can’t spell either and I seek approval of the people I like and respect too.

But I have filters. So many filters.
I always thought I was a very open and honest person.
While I am that, I also have filters of all colours.

Those filters make me judge and stay silent and restrict myself in multiple ways.

But some are needed.
Their silly behaviour is approved and adored now.
But 10 years later it will not be condoned.

Spending time with children is really therapeutic.
It lets you sort your filters and get rid of the ones blocking your light.

i’ll be honest & frank & open
i am not who you think i am
i am a fire, a storm, a field of flowers, a calm breeze, a sad kid who lost their balloon
i am a mix of terrible genes & upsetting darkness
i am filled with confusion, even though i confessed to knowing who i am & what i thought i was doing
my last confession is filled with shame & sadness
i am a lost boy/girl/thing in search of someone to tell me who i should be & what i need to be
i was never good at decision making
but i’ll be damned if i let someone else make a wrong decision
i am disgusted with myself on every level of physicality, emotions, & mentality
i am not that little mormon girl i was raised to be
i am not that boy that fell in love with the girl
i am not that person who became reckless & stupid
i am me, only me, with a million labels because i am scared to tell anyone how i truly feel
i’ll be rejected again & again
crying wolf never got me very far
no one trusts me, no one believes me, no one cares
i want to be free from society’s cage around my head
i live in a world where i am scared to voice an opinion
i am ashamed that i care what others think of me
i am sorry for those i have lied to
i am in regret of every action i’ve committed
i am so full of depression, i’m bursting at the seams of my being
soon i will be nothing
& no one can stop me this time–
—  confessions #12, my last confession

thank you to all of you who sent me messages concerned about how i was doing after the news broke, it means more to me than you know that so many of you thought of how i was doing when something so disappointing for such a large group of people happened. really, thank you so much <3

and i’m sorry if i’m few hours of silence were alarming to you or made you worried. i just needed some time to process, and as you know i’m in a much better, more more hopeful place than i was immediately after.

but again, thank you. from the bottom of my heart.

anyway so the reason why i haven’t been responding to “whats ur thoughts on X” is basically because every time i do it i get fifty more angry whites in my inbox and there’s only so much shit i’m able to take

i haven’t blocked anyone who genuinely wants me to know jfyi, i’m just tired

but i feel the need to point out a few things that have been sent my way:

1. yes i’m hesitant to reblog more evak stuff unless it’s completely related to sana, or if it’s not fanart (bc i think fan creations are nice !!!). u might see them queued tho bc. i love my sons. but i also feel like there’s so many only talking about evak and my blog… hopefully… isn’t going to be one of those. i stand with sana, i stand with her this season, and i’m only interested in seeing her tbh. had the season been written better this might’ve been different, but seeing as it’s not, this is what i’ll be doing. follow evak blogs if ur only interested in them…………..

2. yes i still love evak

3. no i don’t hate noora or vilde (well… i hate their behaviour) because i know they’re 1) better 2) aren’t dumb blonde girls 3) that’s exactly the reason why i don’t talk about them because if they aren’t dumb blonde girls they better get their shit together. like. yesterday.

4. the reason i’m pissed about this season is the way it’s written and– obviously– going to be written. the way the girl squad is loaded with tension is not a good message to send out to the youth. they villainise the only coded lesbian on the show which is an old trope i could live without seeing again. i’m pissed that sana gets the shit from the fandom and the writing. i’m pissed that this season isn’t what we thought it was going to be. i’m pissed that they haven’t mentioned ramadhan not even once yet and as i’m writing this it’s 21:46 on may 26th. that’s nearly 10pm guys. i’m pissed at the fandom only wanting the white girls being redeemed when that’s not the fucking point of this series. i’m pissed at the fandom jumping on muslims and/or muslims of colour and/or people of colour in this fandom for voicing their/our concern about the turn of this season.

(note: we have every fucking right to be pissed. we aren’t “unreasonable” for being pissed. we aren’t “reaching”. if this happened to us in real life? man, i would’ve burnt down that school.)

5. there’s the meta that i think is legit gonna happen in which sana will expose sara via isak’s and hers conversation. and whether or not it’s good of sana to do that is an unrelated topic (personally? thank goodness it’s time) but let me remind you that 1) it’s gonna villainise the girl of colour again (whom also is muslim) 2) isak did basically the same thing to eva so like don’t. try. to villainise sana in this 3) but we know it’s gonna happen so i’m gonna block anyone tryna fuck with me on this

6. each update gives me more pain. i’m dreading each update because it’s just painful to watch. i love sana, i love her with everything that i am. but it’s reached a point in this season where everything is just painful. even my posting this is going to be painful bc i know what awaits in that inbox.

7. i’m probably not going to buy into whatever redemption anyone on this show has. it’s unreasonable to ask us of colour and the muslims of this fandom to forgive people for what we are literally put through even today. just sidelined, only asked for when y’all wanna talk about something in your life (which is fine, but to a certain point) and shit like that.

anyway the point of this post was mostly to acknowledge y’all and to rant

anonymous asked:

What do you make of this mystery/insider anon the Sprousehart who somehow miraculously predicted this would happen and stuff concerning SH will continue over the next few weeks. Wtf, how would they know this stuff? Like who tf plans a breakfast "date" days or weeks in advance and how would know this stuff. I didn't believe it before. But now I'm convinced this is a PR stunt. Thanks for opening my eyes!

My biggest question is why they went to a SH blog. But I guess if they went to me no one would have believed them. Wonder who it is…

But just because it’s a PR stunt doesn’t mean KJ’s not hurting. I cannot emphasize this enough. KJ is in London for the next five days and that gives him ample time to second guess his entire relationship, so please send him good thoughts and tweet him and let him know he has support. He’s going to need it over the next few weeks! THAT DOES NOT MEAN MENTION THE RELATIONSHIP. THAT WILL MAKE THINGS WORSE!

As I said to a previous anon, I’m just hoping for a short relationship contract, but short means 3 months, so it’s going to be hard.

“Tell me your thoughts, my friend,” I say to Bastion.

They tell me their thoughts.

D.Va’s meka is the largest, fattest flamingo they have ever seen.

They would like to know how long it will take until Ganymede is as tall and beautiful as Mercy.

Torbjorn needs to stop leaving his young unattended in strange places; this is why they die so often. They also want to know who the father is.

They also like Hanzo’s tail feathers, which I can only assume means his hair ribbon.

As it turns out, Bastion thinks anyone who is not an Omnic is just a very large, strange bird.

shaladin safe space

please reblog this if you’re pro-shaladin, or at least are not anti-shaladin. i need to know that there are more of us out there, shipping and multishipping and seeing shiro happy with his paladins. also i want more shaladin-positive blogs to follow.

this blog is a shaladin safe space.

For everyone who would like to know what happened at the Ariana Grande concert at the MEN in Manchester (UK) tonight (22nd May 2017).

There has been reports of a number of fatalities (deaths) due to an explosion. No one actually saw what happened but witnesses said they felt and heard what they thought was an explosion. Victoria Station has been closed and people are offering places to stay and lifts to those who need to leave. For children who attended the concert without parents/whom have been separated from their parents, there is a Premier Inn near and they are taking them in. Trains are not stopping at Victoria and I believe the trams have stopped running at this time of night/have stopped because of this.

For live updates follow @gmpolice or @BBCBreaking on Twitter (or any account holding live updates that you can find).

UPDATE: There is a new video clip of a Mancunian’s dash cam. You can very loudly hear a bang, even from as far away as this person was. Bomb disposal units have also arrived.

I figured out how to stop loving someone you’re not supposed to love anymore. I know it sounds impossible but trust me, we’ve done it before. I told my first love that I’d love him forever, but I don’t anymore. He has a spot in my heart- just like my dog and my best friends and a teacher that changed my life- but I don’t love him anymore because that was a different person who was with him and I’m not her anymore. And one day, we’ll no longer love the people we love now, we just have to wait for ourselves to change again. And we try to speed it up by starting new hobbies, getting haircuts, moving, learning a new language. Anything. Because the sad truth is we know we need to shed part of ourselves to fall out of love. And that sucks but it’s necessary.

Producer Jeff Bhasker faced a daunting task several months ago. After having worked with Kanye West and winning Grammy Awards for producing Mark Ronson’s “Uptown Funk,” and Fun.’s 2012 album “Some Nights,” he had to decide whether to take on a new project: the debut solo album of One Direction member Harry Styles.

“I’d just had a baby, and I was kind of like, ‘Eh, I don’t know if I’ll jump into this,‘” Bhasker tells Variety. He agreed to have Styles come over to “just talk,” and proceeded to put him through the Bhasker home sniff test. “My dog tends to bite people, and he was kind of scoping Harry out,” Bhasker explains. Styles “did this move — like a little shoot the gun with his finger, and my dog walked over and started licking his finger. That’s when I was, like, ‘This guy has something special.'”

Once music came into the mix, Bhasker was sold. “He started playing references of what he wanted to do, which sounded like a cool rock band. I got it, and could see where if we pulled this off, it would be one of the coolest things ever. But he needed a buddy who plays guitar like he’s Keith Richards.” The insinuation being: Styles is the Mick Jagger in this scenario.

Adds Bhasker: “I’m so proud of the album itself, and also of Harry for being so brave, and committing 100%, and writing the kind of vulnerable lyrics that he wrote, and not pandering to what people thought he would do. People have no idea that this is what Harry Styles is like. Just like I didn’t know. He’s obviously very famous and beloved, but people don’t know the depths of what an amazing personality and artist he is.”

Variety spoke with Bhasker about the recording of “Harry Styles” ahead of the album’s May 12 release: 

Keep reading


YES, this, is for today’s prompt “Confession” and I’m absolutely NOT ASHAMED OF IT 8DD

I was kinda sad when I realized the crossover prompt didn’t win the poll so last week I was like “WELL SHIT I’M DOING A CROSS OVER ANYWAY” and litteraly made this one before all the other prompts

Lapidot reminds me a lot of other ships I love but the most similar is Alphyne but Lapidot is still my big fav tho so I felt the need to make this because it thought this was fun and because this is one of my favorite parts of Undertale and because I’m a huge trash

I mean come on you got  the small blonde nerd having a huge crush and a cool, blue and strong one. The small one takes their blue gf in their fandom, they look at each other with the weirdest and cutest faces…Also you got a child, who help them making it work

I…just love these dorks <3

Btw I first didn’t know who would replace MTT but Sardonyx seems to be a good choice. I’m just currently laughing at what I’ve done lmao


i think peridot is a little too tall in this one

i’m so not sorry for all this

(boop @lapidot-anniversary-week and @luclipse85)

(By the way I actually made another cross over, made before the poll results. I’ll post it tomorrow with the selfies :^) )