i need more followers so i can stop doing this hashtag bullshit

Sexism in the Arts

So the NY Times recently tweeted this:

A 27-year-old mother who barely uses social media is selling more albums than anyone thought was still possible

The person they were talking about? Adele. ADELE. You know, the woman who has 21.4 MILLION Twitter followers. The woman who just blew past N*Sync’s record for debut week. The woman with the top hit songs that pretty much everyone is singing.

Reduced to:

  • woman
  • mother
  • inept social media user

This is some grade-A bullshit. Because at the end of the day, the same attitude exists for women in any creative field. The same questions. The same dismissiveness and reductions.

Keep reading

Joy Sparkle BS Speaks- Laineys Twitter and Livestream Attacks

I tried to be kind, considerate, and give Lainey a chance to speak, as she wanted. But now I am speaking out on what happened last night.

I run a youtube channel Joy Sparkle BS. I released an interview with Erin and Haylee, two girls Lainey dated ONLINE, and had made plans to meet up with both, around 2 weeks ago. I moved on from the onision subject and onto other topics. I said from the beginning I am NOT here to cover all of his dramatic BS, honestly there would be NO way in the WORLD to keep up with it all. I only wanted to focus on the two subjects, his making money off of underage minors and children in their underwear, with no apology, and him harassing billie, ayalla, and his exes/harassment of teenagers.

Last night, Lainey decided to start tweeting about the interview, to which I got an onslaught of 12 year old onion and lamp fans reacting with nonesense on twitter to me, which is fine, they are children, this is what they do.

I began doing a younow broadcast, and while I was streaming, Sarah was mentioned in tweets that were being written back and forth between the 12 year olds and myself, and SArah responded and send me the “cash me outside, how bou dat” meme.

Sarah also let me know i was using incorrect pronouns for lainey.

i respectfully told sarah i loved that meme and thanks for sending it, and told her that i not only have health/memory issues, but moreso, lainey keeps changing her pronouns, with my memory issues i have a hard time keeping up with it.

then lainey began streaming, so people from my stream went back and forth between streams to let me know what was being said. lainey was ripping me, erin, and haylee apart, as far as i understood it from my viewers and younow.youtube friends. lainey said the following:

-She was upset that I did not reach out to her directly and get her side of the story before i released the interview. —I explained that I DID reach out, i tweeted at her TWICE, but felt if i tried more than that, she would think I am harassing her, so I figured she was not interested, which is fine, thats her choice. Im a smaller youtuber (11k subs and growing) and figured she did not want to get involved.

-After my viewers/friends relayed the message, she said I did not try HARD  enough to get intouch with her, that i should have tried her busiess email or instagram. —-I had NO idea she had a business email, and i dont have an instagram, only facebook and twitter, so twitter was the only way i knew how to respectfully contact her.

-I offeredto speakto her, woman to woman, to which she replied if I tried to come into her broadcast she would block me

-Seeing as tho i dont like bullshit, and want to be fair, i went into her stream and left 3 respectful comments telling her i would be happy to talk to her in private/interview her/or invite her on my stream, and that we can work thigs out peacfully. i was threatened to be blocked, not sure if it ever happened.

-As I was in the stream, everyone was writing KILLJOY andmaking it a hashtag. this went on throughout the WHOLE stream, and my understanding is ONLY in the end did they tell everyone not to kill me and start blocking people about it. It was also reported when people started saying to kill me, the two girls laughed.

-Lainey accused me of doing it for the money, so i showed SCREEN SHOTS of my stats to PROVE i dont monetize the onision series on the underage miniors in underwear OR the harassment of billie and ayalla

-to which they replied i did it for attention and subs, however my subs were in the high thousands by the time that interview was released

-My viewers tried to reason with her and let them know I am a decent person and fair and im trying to be kind,t o which she threatened to block my viewers for saying that

-She said she woud not speak to me bc i misgendered her

-When ym viweres told her i have memory issues (veyr true, copper toxicity and fibromyalgia) she said  i misgendered her throughout the whole video.

-I thenw ent on twitter and respectfully wrote lainey 3 tweets letting her know i was open to speaking to her, apologized if i was at all offensive, and offered a private convo to respect her privacy, to which she kept tweeting PUBLICALLY at me. 

-Long tweeting stories short, she told me that she already said everyting she needed to say, insisted i take the interview down bc i know its all lies (which is not true, ive SEEN the proof from what the girls told me, and lainey offered me no proof and refuses to talk to me, although shes upset that i wont talk to her, so…), and when i asked to speak w her bc she wanted me to, said she told her story through the younow stream and for me to watch it.

-When i asked her where it was archived, bc i coudnt see it, she said she didnt know, she hadnt used younow in a year,although she used it a couple weeks ago when she doxxed one of the anti onision bloggers online.

-i asked her how i can tell her story if she did not have the broadcast up, she did not respond. i asked twice nicely, no response.

now today, after her fans went after me again, she has blocked me.

sorry for the typos and if this is written oddly, having a sick night tonight, but wanted to share my side of how this went down.i am STILL willing to talk to her and be fair and balanced, however, in the end, i think this is all crybullyism, she gets it from Greg. ive been OVERLY supportive and kind to her in my videos, this was just another way she can lash out at people while claiming to be the victim.

now greg is harassing these girls AGAIN. i was true to my word, i stopped reporting on him when he and the clan backed off of harassment of the girls. but now will be following this until he stops again.

thanks for taking the time to read. if anyone has any questions please direct them to my tumblr joyspakrlebs or my twitter joysparklebs

[submitted by: joysparklebs]


Originally posted by wojshere

Somethings are fragile and the human heart and it’s emotions are one of them. Sometimes it’s a word, a look, news or body language that can break a heart. But for Kiki nothing broke her heart more than the hashtag that followed the posts of or with her that her best friend posted on Instagram.


I mean, it wasn’t really his fault. He was never the best with reading a girls mind but he always seemed to kind of have a better perception of Kiki’s mind than any other females. How had he not figured it out?

Hector wasn’t dumb, per say, he was actually reasonably intelligent. He had the schooling system at La Masia to thank for that. Well, and the fact that he wouldn’t have been allowed to stay at the academy if he didn’t get good grades.

Hector and Kiki had been the best of friends since they were 4, way before either of them grasped the concept on cooties. No matter how many people thought it was weird for them to be friends it didn’t faze either of them. Even in high school when the popular girls saw his Instagram posts tagging her in them and asking if she had ever ‘tapped that’, which at the time she found disgusting, she simply just laughed and said they were best friends. Much to their delight of course as they continued their quest to be the girl that tied Hector Bellerin down. Many had tried and all had failed.

There was only 4 things Hector had time for in his life: football was always number one, his family came in at a close second then it was Kiki and then it was food. No girl other than Kiki factored into his life, he didn’t have time for the stress of girls and their attitudes. Kiki’s was enough.

Many texts had been exchanged between the two where Kiki had gotten ‘aggy’, as Hector referred to it, and Hector simply just told her to drop it and she would send a meme. He could never take her attitude seriously, she was like a moody puppy.

They only lived two streets apart but it was incredible how different their living spaces were. Hector lived in the typical flashy bachelor pad overlooking the city whereas Kiki lived in a small terraced house shared with three other people. Surprisingly Hector preferred to spend time at Kiki’s, feeling too lonely and like his apartment was far too empty to spend time in. Kiki’s was always full of noise and laughter and the conflicting music tastes of the four housemates and Hector loved it. Whenever he was there it didn’t matter what they were doing, whether they were watching a movie, Hector playing COD with her housemates, Hector cooking whilst Kiki sat on the counter refusing to help. At Kiki’s he wasn’t the star right-back of Arsenal, he was just simple Hector Bellerin who was good at COD and could cook better than anyone in the terraced house.

A rainy Saturday night spent with the soft hum of The Weeknd on in the background was a regular occurence at Kiki’s. Hector was lying back on her bed, scrolling through social media and reading articles on the latest transfer news whereas Kiki was sat on her windowsill reading her latest love: the Harry Potter series.

“Keeks?” The male spoke, making the nursing student look up from her enthrallment in the book and gesture him to continue. “C’mere.” He whined. Hector loved spending time with his best friend, finding comfort in the way she played with his hair and the warmth she shared as she snuggled into his side. The female obliged, stepping down from her windowsill and shutting the thick book and plopping herself down on the bed. Instantly she felt two strong arms wrapped around her and pulled her back into a warm body.

“You’re so needy Hec.” She giggled but she adored the contact. She found contentment as Hector sighed in bliss. Before she could find herself wrapped up in hopes and dreams of a possible relationship with Hector she was snapped back into reality.

“You love it amigo.” That stupid word that single-handedly managed to break her heart every single time the idiot spoke it. She slowly raised herself, trying to act inconspicuous as she left the embrace. She swung her legs off the bed and raised herself.

“You should go Hec. It’s late.” She spoke, tying her hair into a sloppy ponytail. Hector rose, his eyebrows raised and confusion painted blatantly on his face.

“It’s Saturday, I always stay over.”

“I forgot I have class in the morning.” Lie. “I need to study.” Lie. “You should go.” Hector reached his hand out to grab her arm, hoping to make sense of the situation but she dodged his hopeful grasp. “Go Hector.” Unfortunately for Kiki, her best friend was not buying her bullshit and grabbed her and pulled her onto his lap.

“You have to tell me what I’ve done or I can’t fix it Keeks.” He sighed, playing with her hands. He rested his head in the crook of her neck and inhaled her scent. “C’mon Keeks, you tell me everything.” He persisted.

Kiki sighed. “Hec, please. I’ve just got class tomorrow and can’t risk missing it.” She lied again.

“Well that’s funny because your schedule is on the wall and you don’t have class tomorrow and if you did you would’ve written it in. So stop bullshitting and tell me the truth.” Kiki stuttered in reply. “Keeks just tell me.”

“I can’t.”

“Can’t or won’t?” Hector sighed and placed his lips on her cheek, making her pull away. “For gods sake, just tell me.”He raised his voice.

“You won’t understand.”

“Try me.”

“I, I” Kiki stuttered as she tried to admit her true feelings. Could she even do this? Admit her feelings to the one always had by her side? “I like you.” She spluttered out.

Hector raised an eyebrow. “I like you too. Is that it?”

“No Hector.” She shook her head. “I like you. I like you, like you.” She watched intently as Hector raised his eyebrows.

“I thought that was obvious?”

“Excuse me?” She stuttered, the hell did he me?

“Why do you think I act how I do with you?” Hector chuckled. “Keeks, I act that way because I like you. I thought that was completely obvious.” Kiki gazed at him with a confused expression painted on her angelic face, sparking another chuckle from Hector. “Let me prove it.”

He slowly placed his lips against hers, tender as ever. Kiki didn’t feel fireworks, she felt something so indescribably perfect. She felt every part of her body tingle as Hector ran his hands down her waist, tentatively pulling her closer. He was cautious of overstepping his boundaries, he was not going to screw this up.

They had to pull away, smiles adorning their features as Hector pulled both of them back onto the bed.

“Go to sleep babe.”

“Damn, I kiss you and go front amigo to babe? I should’ve done that sooner.”

Listen. I had more than one person say they got the exact same message, and even compare screencaps, so you can cut the crap thinking that a vile message like that is beneath your side of the fandom, because as disgusting as it is, it’s getting pretty fucking common.

It’s a screencap, because I blocked them… which is the same reason I’ve screencapped you. I don’t allow awful people to have a direct line of communication to me. You send stupid, impossibly hateful shit and you get blocked. Simple as. Bye.

I didn’t reply directly to the anon, because giving airtime to some shitstain who thought it was okay to weaponise the passing of a beautiful, kind-hearted woman into a vehicle for their own hatred, especially in the immediate wake of her death, bizarrely enough, wasn’t something I was interested in doing while we were all in shock and grieving. 

I’m posting it now because I’ve had numerous dickheads like you, barrel into my inbox insisting that it’s got to be a made up quote. Presumably that means that one of the 4 Name-Brand Antis who have more than 11 followers has made a post claiming I must be lying. Well here you go and congratuations, here’s the proof that you’ve all been behaving exactly as horribly as we’ve been saying you have. You must be so proud. 

Another thing: I don’t care how many notes I get on a post. I don’t check my notes. Hell, I barely check my INBOX. I don’t care. I didn’t know how many notes that post had. Hell, I’d forgotten about that post. I have bigger concerns right now. We all have bigger concerns right now. The only posts I care about getting a lot of notes are the ones telling people which charity hashtag to post about for Project Just Hold On, the ones telling people how they can help get the single to played on the radio and up to #1 and the ones celebrating Louis’ amazing work and Jay’s incredible legacy. Anyone who is doing ANYTHING AT ALL in an attempt to be Famous On The Internet is an absolute fuckwit; this is true at all times, but doubly true in our current circumstances. 

Also, I just want to put something out there, a PSA if you will, to you and all of your friends that maybe you haven’t bothered to consider before - literally nothing you say to, or about me has the capacity to hurt my feelings. There are no combination of hateful words that you could possibly put together that is going to make me feel bad about myself, or my actions on this blog or in real life. I don’t respect you and I don’t care about you, and therefore you don’t matter to me. Your opinions, your words, your actions, they’re all meaningless to me.

To the people who loathe me, but keep tabs on me, to the ones who hate-follow me, or screencap my posts to post on their own blogs (because they can’t take a hint at being blocked) and then go on and on about how dreadful I am. I hope you understand that you’re blogging in a vacuum. A sad, weird, obssessive vaccum. I hope you enjoy it, because you’re thinking about me a hell of a lot more than I’m thinking about you. 

Sometimes I feel incredulous at how vile you are, completely blown away by the misguided rage that seems to boil over in all of you, until you’re commiting hateful acts ~in the name of decency~ (ps, that’s not a thing you can actually do), but then I block you and go on with my day. You’re not achieving anything through sending me these kinds of messages, you’re genuinely not, so realistically you all need to just stop trying. 

Now if you’ll all excuse me, I’m going to get back to blogging about things that actually matter - this fantastic fan project and this incredible song. 

On The Neverending Bullshit That Is Fashion Blogging

When I decided to start this blog a few months back, my goal was pretty singular: talk about money in a way that doesn’t make me feel like an old, crusty white man in a boxy suit (and perhaps, as a second goal, have an outlet for my shoddy personal photography). But the point was just to have a space to talk about the stuff that gets to me – the overwhelming crises of bills, my inability to understand investments, the constant anxiety of picking the right insurance plan, and so on and so forth. It was a place to talk.

Since that initial starting point, I have decided I want to make something more of it. I am working with (an incredibly talented and somehow also incredibly chill) designer, I have invested in a camera that can take slightly less shoddy photos, and I am making BiG pLaNs for the future of the site.  And yesterday, when I posted a little photo of my new camera to #enhance my personal #brand (and to solicit some much-needed photography advice), I got a couple jokes along the lines of “Now you’re going to become a famous fashion blogger.”

And this is a joke, yes, as I have neither the disposable income nor the bone structure to be a famous fashion blogger, but I still feel compelled to say: Fuck that. Fuckkkkk thatttttt.

Part of the reason The Financial Diet is important to me is because, as a 25-year-old woman who lives on the internet and likes both pumpkins and art-directed photos of minimalist bedrooms, I am a prime candidate (victim) for Lifestyle Blogs. Left to my own devices, I am liable to get sucked into a k-hole of hate-browsing fashion blogs, scrolling through their untouchable Instagrams, and marveling at their uncanny ability to turn their life into one uninterrupted stream of sponsored content.

And I work in sponsored content. I have written or ideated dozens if not hundreds of various pieces of copywriting by now, and genuinely enjoy the work. I have nothing but respect for the hustle, and on the rare occasion that a brand has approached me with an offer to try out some free shit for a bit of personal Chelsea Fagan promotion, you better believe I was about that shit. But this is a mere shadow in the towering monolith that is the Fashion Blogger, as almost all of the content they will produce (no matter how much they choose to illegally not disclose that shit, and that is its own can of worms for the FTC to open) is funded by somebody

The thing about Fashion Bloggers – and their mutated, diversified cousins, the Lifestyle Bloggers – is that they aren’t REALLY people. At least, not in the way we think of people. Follow one of these waifish WASPs on Instagram and prepare to know literally nothing about them except that they enjoy macarons, get to travel for free, and are being followed around constantly by some put-upon boyfriend who has to risk his life in city streets to capture her #ootds. Everything they put out to the world is filtered through that Pinterest-brand art direction and a DSLR, a procession of blazers and lattes and crisp white sheets that is impossible to tell from anyone else.

And look, I am as basic as the next bitch, I love all of those things. But I have two issues here: One, can you at least provide me with one piece of information about yourself that doesn’t come in the form of a hashtag, and Two, can you please not pretend that the life you are living and aesthetic you are presenting isn’t expensive as shit? I have had the privilege of finding out, through my work, what these bloggers are getting for endorsements and guest posts, and trust me – you don’t want to know. And I also know that, if you want to keep those sweet, sweet branded dollars flowing, the best thing to do is remove all trace of potentially controversial content from your site. You don’t want to express an opinion, or curse, or even denote a preference that doesn’t come in the form of a shirt you have to promote. So they turn into something like Cashmere & Rosé or whatever the fuck they are called, and cease to exist outside of posts about what they’re “totally obsessed with this week!”

That’s another thing: Stop saying you’re obsessed with things. The only thing you are obsessed with is free shit, which I get, as I am also obsessed with that. But please be honest about it. You can still drown in endless sponsorships, you can just do it while providing at least a glimpse into what you actually enjoy or think about in your day-to-day life.

I guess what I hate more than anything is that, in the great MeDiA LaNdScaPE, you are forced to choose between “people who actually have sweet/funny/interesting things to say” and “people who satisfy my ceaseless thirst to look at pictures of macarons.” And I don’t think my life’s mission is to straddle those two worlds, as I know right now my photo game will never be anywhere CLOSE to what these people are putting out (photoshop stresses me out, and I am just not photogenic enough to inspire people to want to look like me, which is kind of a relief). But I do think that it’s important to call out this obnoxious trend, as a whole generation of #influencers is turning into this dead-behind-the-eyes hybrid of Kylie Jenner and Martha Stewart.

Fashion bloggers have to be aspirational, yes, but they can still be people. Because no one’s life can look like that, and they know that, and we know it, and there is no reason to continue playing the game. Even if we had the limitless income and spare time to make every outfit worthy of a blog post, and art direct the cheese we eat while standing in front of the fridge in our underwear, who would even have the time? We have jobs. And we need a fashion blogger for the working woman. Because life is stressful enough already.

Rant/pep talk. If you dont agree just ignore this. Dont take me srsly either lol

Just few words of encouragement for you aspiring/amateur/hobby artists. If you dont call yourself an artist and consider yourself more of a “person who draws/writes” thats fine too but remember that being an artist is not only a job title, or something you do pretty often. You just are okay. Everybody can be an artist!!! Kindergarteners are artists!! YOUR PLANT IS ART

Anyways where i was going with this. Ah right. This is just coming from the heart ok and I’m gonna be blunt about it. If you think that the notes on your art posts reflect how good you are THATS BULLSHIT. And i will admit it ok but i feel salty about some posts of mine which didnt take much effort gaining more popularity than the ones i spent lit DAYS. (I feel salty about other ppl too lol I’m human let me be) so I’m like WTF Tumblr ppl? so anyways one of the reasons why i think (personal opinion coming from personal experience dont hate me for this) its bc of how a fandom works. A lot of fanart get more popular than original work so lets face it. Its more of a crowd interested in the same topic than individuals looking for original stories. And its also one of the reasons why i stayed as a fanartist or created original stories but with ALREADY existing characters. Ya i need to make friends somehow lmao

Many drawings will get to 10k+ and it’s sometimes due (but absolutely NOT the only reason) to it being cute and simple, a relatable comic, A POPULAR SHIP, a trending style, or a good ass headcanon that will break many hearts. BUT they face cons too like having their art reposted shit ton of times or badly edited and resized in a horrible way or just ppl hating on them bc they dont agree. I feel for you. And its not like they intended to be that way ok MY POINT is to talk about how a fandom behaves and not shit on artists OK I LOVE ARTISTS THEY ARE ALL COOL BUT I FEEL INTIMIDATED. Ok bye

(Not like I’m saying they dont deserve all that bc there are actually ppl w super cool stuff and styles that deserve so much more and they EARNED it. every single one of heir followers and note. They worked their ass off, studied, practiced everyday, been doing it for years, etc.. I started drawing since i was a kid and just practiced hard a lot so i get to defend myself lol)

And some people (me included) think that a drawing reaching over 1k notes is a milestone. I mean it is!!!! My shit got seen by prob over 500 ppl in the whole world holy shit!!! My mom would never believe this!! but dont get hung on trying to reach a notes count quota!!! Because many reasons THAT YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER play a role on how your posts are being reached. Either someone is followed by a popular blog and their stuff gets spread like wildfire, it’s /aesthetic/ and trendy so they are a hot topic, it’s released p fast after some ep aired (ie drawing what happened in the ep that just broadcasted 10 min) its like fresh bread just out of the oven and still warm. The amount of hashtags used since they contribute to how searchable your stuff is. And then the elephant in the room. THE FANDOM ITSELF. Yes I’m talking about gay sports anime. And others ahem.

AGAIN I’m not blaming the artists themselves, you are all cool keep doing your thing. Its their choice what they decide to draw for. If you suspect some of us decided to draw a fandom just to be popular or be noticed or wtv LET US BE. ITS OUR LIFE. If we are not hurting or offending you then you really dont have anything to complain about. Ahem I’m getting myself dragged off topic. Try to not be sleep deprived my children this is what happens.

BUT YOOOUUUUUUU. If you are discouraged bc of notes, popularity, or the type of ppl following you (if its p*rn blogs then I’m rly concerned) STOP!!! AND LOOK AT ME!! WELL JUST KEEP READING!!! YOU ARE VALUABLE. EVERYTHING YOU PRODUCE IS AMAZING BC BEING ABLE TO CREATE SOMETHING FROM YOUR IMAGINATION IS LIKE TOTALLY AMAZING. DO NOT TAKE FOR GRANTED YOUR ENTHUSIASM OR ABILITY TO DO SOMETHING!!!! When I’m a rotten old tomato i will be HELLA PROUD of all the shit i drew in my blossoming years. Like “look at all the sad and horrible drawings i did kids. YES ALL BY ME. Nobody believed this headcanon but i went and did it!!!”

Nobody or nothing should stop you from creating art!!!! GO WILD MY FRIEND. Go do what your heart desires do not let NUMBERS decide if you are worthy of exposure or friends or tags we are all big nerds at the end. DRAW WRITE CREATE WITHOUT A CARE IN THE WORLD. IF YOU DONT THINK YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH well let me tell you you will always be your harshest judge. You are the only who knew what went through the process and what mistakes happened. And nobody is perfect tbh not everybody can be beyonce. And THAT IS FINE. I go to sleep knowing I’m not her but i still get up and do my thing!!!

It’s a pill hard to swallow sometimes for some of us. That we want to know where we lie, how popular can we be, how many ppl can we attract, why are we not like others. It’s ALL FINE BUDDY. I sometimes cant ignore it and worry about it too. But then i show my friends the smallest of my crappy doodles from middle school AND THEY ALL THINK ITS AMAZING. Well not all. Again we are all not beyonce. So whatever the internet says irl could be a diff story. But how did that compliment happened?? (i like praise and attention ok i said it it helps my self steem dont judge) BECAUSE YOU CREATED SOMETHING

Ok this is my pep talk to you all. Be proud of what you create. Share it w others if you want. Just start. That’s the biggest hurdle sometimes. Taking the initiative. Sometimes we just need a small push so I’m writing this to push you. Imagine what you could create some years later if you just dont give a shit and improve w every creation you make??? AMAZING RIGHT MY MOM WOULD BE PROUD she will judge tho she calls all my drawings pikachu