i need a silent night

I am a loner 
who has lost the ability 
to be alone

The silence used to
soothe me 
and now I am craving
whispered nothing’s,
innocent intimacies 

I just want someone 
who can be there 
to hold me,
instead of wrapping 
my arms around myself,
in a mockery 
of what I am seeking

—  this loneliness might kill me || O.L.

I want a relationship where when we argue, we actually talk it all out no matter how heated it gets. No, we’ll talk about it later, no shutdown, no walking away, just communication. Then in the end I get to tackle you down and we both lay there in light hearted giggles.

But an Aglionby high school reunion. Nobody is all that surprised when Gansey, Adam and Ronan arrive together because they always sort of suspected that squad was forever. They are surprised however by the ring on Adam’s finger. Ronan and Gansey go off to get something to eat and everybody just zooms in on Adam to ask where his other half is. 

And Adam rolls his eyes, sighs and says: “Over at the buffet table trying to stuff three different pieces of cake in his mouth.” 

I Need A Silent Night
Amy Grant
I Need A Silent Night

“To end this crazy day with a silent night." 

This practically summarizes my daily wish about this time of the year.  By November, I hear myself asking if I had signed up for the kind of frenzy I get entangled in, and 2011 is no special case.  Then my hand reaches out for the iPod click wheel to search for my favorite Christmas playlist, and my fingers find a particular track.

While I still enjoy a good old traditional carol, I admit finding solace in many contemporary Christmas tunes that mirror more closely how the holidays are celebrated these days.  One in particular, Amy Grant’s I NEED A SILENT NIGHT, resonates with my  disposition right now.

All right–we’re not even in the season of Advent yet; but heck, they’ve put up the Christmas tree in our office already.  So I can’t say this song isn’t fitting.  Let’s sing then…


I Need a Silent Night - Amy Grant

This video was played during our last session in Values. This song tells us about the real meaning of Christmas: Jesus Christ. This song is beautiful, so please do listen. :“>