i missed you ; ;

There are pieces of me under everyone I’ve loved’s bed. I used to think this made me empty, that I was missing parts of me. But letting go of those pieces gave room for better parts to grow. Confidence, love, joy.
I stopped writing about love for a moment. I stopped writing about you. Instead I wrote about freshly fallen snow, summer rain, newly cut grass, clothes fresh out of the dryer, tears of joy, tight hugs, old books, running through an open field under a blue sky, and sunsets. I wrote about starry skies and pine trees. I wrote about the city skyline and the way the hue of a morning’s coffee changes when you sweeten it. I wrote about every beautiful thing that doesn’t remind me of us. Yet somehow, even this became about you.
—  endless thoughts

I want to tell him how I really feel.
I want to tell him how he’s changed me.
I want to tell him how he’s my only.

I want to tell him how much I love him.

—  dearestmemory

Beginning of chapter three from my Dragon Ball Super Comic, sorry for letting you wait ;)

Previous chapters readable here:

Part 1: http://redviolett.tumblr.com/post/151183920847/as-promised-the-full-upload-from-the-first-chapter

Part 2: http://redviolett.tumblr.com/post/151891393727/and-again-as-promised-here-the-full-long-post-for

Another little evak moment I have stuck in my head is...

Isak and Even lying in bed one lazy afternoon. Even’s arms are wrapped around his golden haired sweetheart, while Isaks head is literally resting right on his man’s big beautiful heart (which of course belongs to Isak anyway) 

and as i’m sure they do in moments like this sometimes, they begin to reflect on everything they have been through, and reveal personal and deep things that they have felt or thought, that they could never tell anyone else but each other. 

and during this particular moment Isak reflects on That Night, the night that led him to doubt Even’s feelings for him and to hesitate at running to his side even though that was the only thing he wanted to do. He of course doesn’t tell Even everything Sonja said to him straight out. Because our baby is just not like that. He understands why Sonja said what she said and he just wants to forget about it. But the thing is he lets it slip. Somehow he’s just thinking and Even is talking about how he couldn’t believe that Isak would ever in his wildest dreams, like him back, and suddenly it just comes out. 

That Isak thought once that maybe Even’s feelings weren’t ever real and he was just a symptom of his illness. That it had to be true because for Even to love him back was just too good to be true. Even was too good to be true. 

Even of course is instantly annoyed at Sonja, but more than anything he is incredibly sad that the boy that means more to him than anything else in the world. The boy who gives him life in many forms, for one moment believed that Even’s feelings were not real. Even though it is too late, the only thing that becomes important to Even in this moment, is to make sure the man of his life never doubts the amount he loves, adores and worships him ever again. 

Gently, he brushes his fingertips across Isak’s cheek, and leans down to press a soft kiss against his forehead. Isak looks up at him, his green eyes sending shivers down Even’s spine and once again he wonders how this boy cannot know how deep his love truly is, how much he would do for him, how much he affects him from one look. he continues to gently stroke his beautiful handsome face as he tries to send everything he feels for this boy through his eyes. 

he then leans down to Isak’s ear and whispers “The way I feel about you, the things you make me feel; that is the only thing in my entire life that I have been sure about. You are my reason. You are my Life.” 

Isak responds by leaning up to wrap his arms around his neck and gently brush his nose against Even’s, before shrugging and saying “yeah you’re okay too I guess.” They both break out in giggles before wrapping themselves up in each other and letting their lips, hands and hearts fit where they belong, 

with each other. 

If you have free time, read the Seerah of the Prophet ﷺ. Know who your messenger is, try to live the life he lived and grow to love him just as he loved you.

Quando mi sorridi capisco che di tutto il resto non me ne frega nulla