i miss you losers

I don’t think I’m terrified
Of the thought of dying.
I think it’s the idea of leaving
something unfinished.
It’s the worry that
you go before telling her
you love her more than
the number of constellations
you get lost in her eyes.
It’s the feeling of a
spellbinding book
being taken from you in
the middle of a final chapter
and the few boxes you missed
checking on your list.
I don’t think I’m terrified
of the thought of dying.
I think it’s the idea that the only
thing I’ll have when I leave
is missed opportunities.
—  thoughts of insomnia: 2:37 am (11/23/16)

clear singing carols.gif

5

1st round of music show promotions - 7 Performances - Loser

“what he did to you was monstrous.” They say “and now I’m a monster…” I whisper back
—  What happens to people, creates them
10

“I think he became a man who brought peace and wisdom to his world, because he knew about war and folly. I think that he loved greatly, because he had seen what lost love is. And I think he came to know, too, that he was loved greatly.” - The Wednesday Wars

4

Requested by anon.
—-

Chris surprised you on set with lunch. But also, it was his way to make sure nothing happened between you and Jensen.

You two have been dating for three years now, and he still gets jealous.

“You know, you don’t have to stay here all day.” You chuckled, eating some fries.

Chris leaned back in his chair, and squinted his eyes. “And miss watching this loser-I mean guy.”

You rolled your eyes and huffed. “Babe, be nice.”

He glanced at you and shook his head. “How can I be nice when you two get all-” he paused, cringing at the thought. “I just don’t like him. Okay?”

“Babe, you have nothing to worry about. I promise.” You smiled.

He leaned on his elbow and rested his hand on his face.

“I’m in love with you.” You stated. “And nothing is going to change that.”

Chris smiled and tried to play it off as well as hide the blush that crept up his cheeks. He glanced back at Jensen who was sitting on a chair, getting ready for his scene.

Jensen had heard the entire conversation, and though you only thought he saw you as a friend, he saw more than that.

He flashed a wink at Chris, his way of adding fuel to the fire.

Chris felt his body tense and his jaw clench tightly. He almost snarled at the actor as anger washed over him.

You were too focused on your phone to notice anything. Until Chris grabbed your hand and pulled you up to your feet. “Let’s go.” He gritted.

You furrowed your brows. “Where are we going?”

He glanced back at Jensen, then to you. And without a single word, he cupped your face and crashed his lips to yours. Kissing you hard as if it were his last. You felt the kiss all the way down to your feet, giving you chills.

“Your trailer.” He whispered.