i miss weeds.. come back to me now

(JokerxReader) Jokes on you part 1

Hey everyone. This is my first fan fiction so if you have any suggestions please feel free to let me know. Enjoy!


Everyone in Gotham has heard of the Joker, some can’t stand the thought of him and the things that he is capable of; on other hand some could only dream of being in his presence. You are one of the people that dreamed to get to be around him. And tonight is the night you are going to get what’s yours. You and your friend are going to go to his club to drink and dance the night away, but little do they know you have other plans in mind.

You began to get dressed in the best outfit you could find, it’s a (F/C) above the knee strapless dress with black lace over it, black stilettos, and a black choker. You began to put on your favorite black cherry matte lipstick. You put your (H/L) (H/C) into a sexy curly updo. You then strapped your switch blade to your upper thigh and tucked it under your dress ‘No one is going to get between me and my prince tonight.’ You look at yourself in the mirror, you were finally ready to go and get you the prince of your dreams.

About twenty minutes later you pull up with your friend to The Jokers club. The music pulses through the club’s walls and straight into your core. ‘I had no idea I would be so nervous,’ you think to yourself. You stepped out of a black limo that is owned by the friend you had come out with tonight. You looked at the long line and sigh. The line goes around the corner of the building.

“We’re never going to go get in,” you say like a child that just found out they couldn’t go to their favorite amusement park.

“Honey, I got us,” Your friend Bell said waving V.I.P passes right in front of your nose. Your face lights up just like the full moon over head.

“Now I know why I’ve kept you around for so long,” You squeal with joy and hug Bell. ‘You just gave me the ticket to my deepest dreams,’ You think to yourself.

You and Bell began to make your way to the front of the line, receiving dirty looks and rude comments from the crowd. Normally you would have stabbed anyone who had disrespected you but you had other things on your mind. Mr. J is just on the other side of those doors. After what seemed like an eternity you were face to face with the guard.

               “Back of the line. You’ll have to wait your turn like everyone else,” he said. Before you could say anything to him Bell had stepped between you guys and handed him our V.I.P passes. He examined them closely.

               “My apologies, go right in,” he says and opens the door for you and your friend.

               You give him a big teasing smile as you walked past him and into the throbbing music, your heart starts to pound with the beat. Before you go on you search for Mr. J, you decide to get yourself a drink of liquid courage. The bar was actually fairly empty so you take an available stool. A tall handsome blonde haired bartender came up to where you were seated.

               “What can I get for you?” he asks as he wipes down the bar.

               “I’ll take a Whiskey, please.” You respond with a smile.

               “Coming right up,” he says; he turns around to grab a shot glass and a bottle of dark brown liquor. He places the shot glass in front of you and begins to pour your first shot.

               You place down a ten-dollar bill on the bar “Keep the change,” you take the shot and you can feel the burn run all the way down your throat and into your stomach. You have a slight cringe that runs across your face. You breathe a sigh of relief as you can feel the drink slightly start to take an effect. ‘Now it’s time to take my chance to go and chase my dream.’ You think.

               You make your way to the area where it is reported he normally does his thing. You wonder helplessly around the club to no avail. ‘Where could he be? Did I miss him? There’s no way I could have missed him.’ You begin to feel a lump in your throat and tears start to well in your eyes. You run around frantically slowly losing all hope.

               About to lose your shit, you find Bell and tell her you need some air. She is on the dance floor thrusting her body in very fluent movements.

               “Do you need me to come with you?” she asked concerned.

               “No, I’ll be okay I shouldn’t be too long.”  You turn to leave before she can try to stop you.

               The cool air rushes on to your face and you take a deep breath. ‘I can’t believe it. I missed my chance tonight. Maybe I can come back and try again,’ you think to yourself to try and calm down.

               “Hey sexy, why don’t you come over here so I can get good look at you,” some dick weed yells at you.

               “You do not want to fuck with me right now,” You snap a little.

               “Oh kitty’s got claws,” He steps out in front of you.

               “Back off dude. I really don’t want to ruin my dress with your blood,” You say with a growl.

               “I think she just threated you, boss.” Someone said from behind you. Spun around fast, pulling your knife from your thigh and pointed it at them. You started to slash at them when one of them grabbed you and knocked the knife out of your hand. You began to kick and punch them but nothing worked. You slowly began to give up when out of nowhere there was a loud gunshot and a bullet fly past your own head. The man who had grabbed you from behind fell to the ground, dead.

               A laugh roared all around you, and then you saw him. The most beautiful man you have ever seen; with acid green hair, piercing blue eyes, and blood red lips. Time had stopped, there he was, the man you have always dreamed about meeting. Just then his eyes lock on your (E/C) eyes, his sinister laugh had abruptly stopped and his face turned serious.

               “Now, now, gentlemen, is this any way to treat such a lovely lady?” He begins to laugh once more.

               In one swift motion he began to shoot the rest one by one until there was only the guy who had started all of this. He grabs you and wraps his fat hairy arm around your neck.

               “Jokes on you, Joker, she’s mine now,” The guy says, you can smell his putrid breath as he speaks. The man shoves a needle in to your neck. Mr. J looks pissed; you can hear a low growl that comes deep from the Joker’s chest.

               The last thing you hear before falling in to the darkness is the sound of a bullet being discharged from a gun.

Inspired by this text post

Once a week, a few of Castiel’s beloved flowers would go missing.

It had been happening for the past month and a half without any sort of explanation. He would walk outside every Friday at noon to fetch his mail, and every Friday at noon he would find three empty places where he was sure he’d once planted tulips.

It wasn’t a huge deal at first. Three missing flowers hardly took away from the sizeable cluster of colors that Castiel had so proudly nurtured in his front lawn. But as time went on, three became six, six became nine, and nine became unacceptable. He’d worked hard on his garden and to have someone steal from him was something that he just would not tolerate anymore.

There was a flower thief in his neighborhood and Castiel was determined to find out who would do such a thing and what the motivation could possibly be.

The next Friday at eleven o’clock, Castiel pulled up a chair next to the window that faced his front lawn and waited. It wasn’t long before a man not much younger than himself slowed to a stop in front of the bed of flowers.

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