i might need to make a part 2 because there isn't room for everyone

anonymous asked:

Isn't it like, a little fucked up to still use Jamie's ads after firing her and leaving her stranded? Sure, there could be two sides to the story, but since you haven't made a statement yet, I only have hers to go off of.

1) When I employed Jamie, part of her job was to create ads, which I then compensated her for. Why should I give up the content that I paid for? Her no longer working for me doesn’t negate her previous contributions.

2) I didn’t feel the need to publicly make a statement about it because it was a personal matter. I haven’t read Jamie’s statement, but I’m assuming if it has anons coming to me, it probably doesn’t tell the full story. I didn’t “fire her and leave her stranded”. The context was that Jamie and her boyfriend had booked an airbnb for the weekend, because we had discussed how I didn’t want her boyfriend staying at my apartment. I then came home after a long night only to find her and her boyfriend had taken all of my bedding and passed out in the other room. So yes, I was pissed to come home to not only find people in my apartment but also that I had no proper place to sleep. They left, and I honestly thought that we would just reconvene in the morning and apologies would be made and everything would be fine because stuff like this happens. However, when I was cleaning the next morning I ended up finding, and having to clean up, a bunch of used condoms, which really pissed me off. I texted Jamie about it and her response was to just make a joke. By the time she came over I had cooled off and was ready to handle everything maturely, but when she arrived she did not say one single word to me and just got her stuff and left. 

And this was the breaking point for me. Everyone does dumb stuff like this, I know I have! And you get over it. But the way she acted after was really upsetting to me, and I felt disrespected. I’m not trying to victimize myself or come across as acting like I’m all high and mighty when I say all of this, but honestly I gave Jamie a lot. I invited her to come stay with me in New York, and she ended up staying for months. The whole time I treated her as my guest- I didn’t expect or ask her to pay rent, contribute to bills, or anything like that. Occasionally she would pay for meals or some groceries, but for the most part I covered most expenses. And I was more than happy to do this! Again, I’m not saying this to complain about how much of a burden she was or imply that I think she owes me or is forever indebted to me, I’m just attempting to explain the situation! 

I also paid her hourly for the work she did while she was here. She put up with me and the utter chaos that was my life and my apartment, and helped me begin to fix things and learn from the mistakes and improve. So besides having to put up with me, it’s a pretty nice work situation to be in. 

This is how I am in most of my relationships. I want to give as much as I possibly can to people and seeing them happy makes me happy. And I feel selfish even saying this, but  one of the hardest things I’ve been learning to do is to acknowledge when what I’m getting from someone isn’t nearly as much as I’m giving and I’m getting taken advantage of. Which is how I ultimately felt after she showed up and grabbed her stuff without saying a single word to me. 

I might revise this later - I’m exhausted and not sure if I’m making full sense, or coming off like I mean to. But it’s a start.