i mean woah man

  • Hunk: Relax, Keith. I'm going to get you through this. Just tell me what you like about Lance.
  • Keith: Nothing. Everything, I don't know!
  • Hunk: His hair?
  • Keith: You mean those soft brown bangs you wanna hide under like an umbrella on a rainy day? Not really.
  • Hunk: And his face?
  • Keith: It's so gross I want to slap it. I just wanna slap his hideous, beautiful face!
  • Hunk: You mean "kiss?"
  • Keith: No, I mean "slap."
  • Hunk: Woah, you got it bad, man.

So anyway I’m here minding my own business, trying to sleep like a responsible adult, and my brain is like, “No, how about you imagine Gwendoline Christie making out with a turian in their dirty kitchen, because they just had a fight while deciding how to appropriately celebrate the birthday of her four-year-old girl, during which they were forced to acknowledge that they’re actually raising this kid together and are definitely sort of accidentally a nuclear family.”

Kit x Zoe

This was not how the spell was supposed to go. Then again, she should have expected something to go wrong. That was just Zoe’s luck, wasn’t it? Cordelia was teaching her how to use a spell that would let her travel back in time one day. The spell itself was experimental, and really should only have been attempted by the supreme herself. Yet Zoe felt the need to prove herself, and wanted to try it out on her own.

But she didn’t end up going back a day.

Zoe ended up in 1962

Except she didn’t realize that right away. At first she had no idea what to do. All she had with her was what was on her body. Her black dress flowed behind her as she walked for what felt like hours. Soon enough the sun set and the air turned chilly. She needed to find a place to rest, or at least figure out where exactly she was. Eventually she came across an old styled gas station.

She walked towards it, peering in through the dusty glass. It didn’t seem like anyone was around, but she might be able to break in if she tried. She stood up on top of a paint can, pressing her hands against the glass as she moved her face forward, trying to see inside more clearly.

“Can I help you, doll?”

The voice with a Boston accent startled her and Zoe stumbled off of the paint can. Before she fell, she felt a pair of strong arms around her. “Woah there, I didn’t mean to scare ya.” The young man in the greaser suit chuckled softly as he helped her stand back up. She stood and straightened out her dress before looking up at him.

“You coming from a funeral or somethin’?” He gave her a funny look

“No, I’m just lost.” Zoe replied, taking a step back from the stranger. His light brown hair seemed to shine in the moonlight, and he wore the same smug grin Kyle made the first night they met at the frat party. His dimples were almost identical to Kyle’s.

“Well, I’m sure I can help.” He flashed another smile in her direction.

“This might sound crazy, but what year is it?”

“It’s 1962,” He answered her, looking at her skeptically. “I’m Kit by the way. Kit Walker.” He introduced himself, though his accent made it sound more like ‘Kit Walka’.

Zoe’s eyes widened in surprise as she realized how far into the past she had gone. The problem? She didn’t know the spell to go forward in time. Meaning, she was stuck in 1962. Everything seemed to come crashing down on her in that moment. Her chest tightened at the thought of never seeing Kyle again. She was mainly concerned about his wellbeing. There were days that it seemed like she was the only one who knew how to take care of him, or more importantly, knew how to calm him down during one of his fits. The last time she died, he killed Madison in a fit of rage. How would he react this time? Well, Zoe would never know.

Noticing the way Zoe seemed to panic, Kit frowned a took a step forward. “Hey, you alright?”

“I’m… fine.” Zoe lied and took a step back from him, though the expression of her face showed that she was clearly panicked.

“You don’t look too fine. Why don’t ya come inside, I’ll get you something to eat.” Kit offered to her

And that’s how it all started, with that invitation inside.

———————————————————————————————————————————————————-

That invitation inside led to her crashing on his couch, which led to her explaining her story to him, which led to her temporarily moving in with him. Kit didn’t quite believe her when she said she was a witch, however his opinion changed very quickly once she proved it by teleporting around his house.

Kit felt bad for Zoe. He couldn’t imagine what it must be like to be torn away from your friends and family, and time period for that matter. Kit ended up letting Zoe get a job alongside him at the station. It wasn’t usual for a woman to work that sort of job, but Kit figured a futuristic woman like her could handle changing an oil tank. Plus, he liked to spend time with her.

After a year of living together, her and Kit had grown closer together. He reminded Zoe a lot of Kyle before he died. The Kyle she met at the frat party. They had the same goofy smile and lame flirting techniques. It was until a year of living with him that Zoe realized she was falling for him.

Kit couldn’t deny it either, he was really starting to grow fond of Zoe. Her powers fascinated him, her stubbornness made him laugh, her smile was enough to light up his whole day. It was too late now. Kit Walker was falling for Zoe Benson.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————-

On April 27th, 1963, Kit Walker asked Zoe Benson out on a real date.

“You know, I’ve been thinking.” Kit began as he wiped oil off his forehead with a rag. “Maybe we could grab a burger after today’s shift.”

Zoe finished taking the tire off a car with her powers, letting it levitate up. “Yeah sure,” She nodded her head. “Who’s turn is it to pay?”

“No, no, I don’t mean like that…” He ran a hand through his dirty blonde hair. “I wanna… I wanna take ya on a date, Zoey.”

The tire crashed onto the floor in surprise. “Oh.” Zoe replied, unsure of what else to say.

“I just… I thought it’d be nice. You’re a real nice girl, Zoe, and pretty as a picture. I really like ya.”

Zoe turned around and stepped over to him, smiling a bit. “Kit, I really like you too, but it’s not gonna work out.”

“Why not?”

“I didn’t tell you about all of my powers, Kit…” Zoe looked down, tucking a piece of stray hair behind her ear. “I can’t… be, with people.”

“That doesn’t make any sense, Zoey.”

“I can’t have sex. I have a killer vagina.”

“ …What?”

“When I found out I was a witch, it was because I accidentally killed my boyfriend. Whenever I have sex with someone, they die.”

“Oh.” Kit said, more surprised than anything. When he thought about what Zoe might say if she rejected him, he never imagined something like this. Then again, she was a witch after all. There were lots of unexpected things with her. He was quiet for a moment before he took a step forward, taking a hold of her hands. “Zoey, I don’t care about that, I care about you. I… I love you.”

Hearing those words made her heart swell up. Kyle was the first person to ever say that to her. She could still remember it. The way he looked at her, the way he struggled to get out the words, the love she felt for him. She was always going to love Kyle… but it was highly unlikely that she was ever going to see him again, nevermind be with him. And Kit… oh, Kit. He was the first friend she made in this time period, the first person to help her. As time passed, she grew closer to him. He reminded her of Kyle, but he was different too. He was funny, and charming, and always wore that stupid smirk. He was kind, and hardworking, and cooked her breakfast every morning. Zoe couldn’t deny the love she had for him anymore.

“Kit…” Zoe looked up at him. “I love you too.”

He didn’t hesitate to move forward and close the space between them, pressing his lips to hers. She instantly closed her eyes and kissed back, her arms snaking around his neck as he pulled her closer to him.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————–

“Kit!” Zoe shouted as the police all arrived at their house. The two had been together for almost a year, and Kit was even thinking about proposing. Things between them had seemed so perfect. But of course, not everything can stay perfect forever.

“He’s innocent! Kit isn’t a killer!”

Kit was being pulled away in chains as angry people shouted “Murderer!” or “Lady killer!” or “Bloody Face!”. Zoe couldn’t believe this was happening. Kit, her Kit, was not a murderer. This had to be some sort of misunderstanding. She pushed through the crowd, managing to reach Kit before he was thrown inside of the car.

“Zoey get back inside!” Kit looked up at her

“No, I’m not letting them take you!” Zoe shook her head, tears forming in her eyes.

“You have to. It’s okay–I’ll be okay. I promise.” He pressed his lips to hers before the police pulled him away. “I love you!”

Before Zoe could even say it back, the car doors shut and Kit Walker was on his way to Briarcliff.

———————————————————————————————————————————————————-

Several months later, Zoe sat in their living room with a glass of water. It was hard to live without Kit, but she was managing. Without Kit, Zoe lost her job at the garage. Something about it being ‘wrong’ for a woman to do that type of work.

At some point she considered breaking Kit out of Briarcliff, but knew it was helpless. Even if they got out, where would they go? Instead, she put her focus into finding out who the real Bloody Face was to clear Kit’s name.

Since then she was unemployed, but found money other ways. Her magic proved to be very useful. Some days she could simply ask people to give her money and they would be compelled to do so. She still had money, and she still had a place to live, but she didn’t have Kit. There was no pain worse than loneliness.

Her glass nearly fell out of her hand when there was a knock at the door. She reluctantly got up and walked over, opening it. You can imagine her surprise when she saw Kit standing there. “Kit?”

He moved forward and wrapped his arms around her, swinging her around happily. “They caught ‘im, the real bloody face. It was Dr. Thredson–I’m a free man.”

Zoe hugged onto him tightly, burying her face in the crook of his neck. Tears of joy filled her eyes as she hugged onto him even tighter.

“Hey, hey, don’t cry, Zoe.” Kit brushed her tears away with his thumb. “I’m right here, baby.”

“I was so scared,” She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down.

“I’m here now, everything is gonna be okay.” He pulled back from the hug slightly, soothing her hair back.

“What happened to you in there? I tried to visit, but they wouldn’t me in.”

“I’ll explain everything, but I have to do something first. Zoey, if these past months taught me anything, it’s that I love you. I love you so so much, and I never wanna spend another day without you.” He let go of her and took a step back, reaching into his pocket.

“What are you doing?”

He kneeled down on one knee, taking out a ring that was made out of wire. “I know it’s not much, or anything at all. I made it from a hanger in Briarcliff, but I promise I’ll buy ya a real one.” He said with his usual smug grin. “Zoe Benson, will you marry me?”

“Kit…” Zoe took the grin, chuckling softly as she look at the piece of wire. “I love it.”

“Sooo, is that a yes?”

“Of course it’s a yes!”

Kit instantly stood up and wrapped his arms around Zoe again, spinning her around. She laughed with delight before his lips met hers. They two held onto each other happily, refusing to let each other go. They were separated for far too long, but they were back together now. And they were ready spend the rest of their lives together.

“I love you, Zoe Benson.”

“I love you too, Kit Walker.”

Can we take a moment to appreciate this scene from Bleach S Abridged
  • *Ichigo and Ganju encounter Ikakku and Yumichika*
  • Yumichika: What luck. We got the weak ones.
  • Ikakku: Bitchin. Lets raggle us up some ryoka!
  • Yumichika: You there, other soul reaper, grab that man!
  • Ichigo: What? Woah, hey, I mean... A-Ha! I've got you, you tricky ryoka! Thought you could escape by making a pool of sand? Ha-ha-ha! Nnnnnot on my watch...
  • Ganju: We're for seriously doing this?
  • Ichigo: For seriously. Now, I must take you to the, uh... the place where people go when they have beeeeen...
  • Yumichika: Repentance cell?
  • Ichigo: A-ha-ha-ha! Absolutely that! Which is located in the direction ooooooof...
  • Ikakku: The big old white tower in the middle of seireitei?
  • Ichigo: An astute reminder! Comrade. Now, go find my frien - I mean more ryoka. I'll handle this one.
  • Ikakku: You got it.
  • Yumichika: Keep up the good work.
  • Ikakku: What a nice fella. I think I remember him from the academy.
Starish & QN’s reaction to their crush giving them homemade chocolate on Valentine’s Day!

Natsuki: “Uwaah~! I can’t believe ____-chan made chocolate just for me! Thank you so much! Here, let’s eat some together. Say, ‘Ahhh..’.”

Tokiya: “You went to the trouble of making these for me? It looks like I’ll need to get to work so that I can properly thank you for this.”

Cecil: “Getting chocolate from you just makes today even better. Soon, I’ll make it up to you. I promise.”

Ren: “I’m not a big fan of chocolate but I’m sure it’d taste a lot better coming from you. Maybe it’d be even sweeter if you feed it to me?”

Otoya: “You really made this on your own? I hope it wasn’t tough but I’m sure they came out great. They are from you after all. I-I mean, uh–Ahahaha…”

Syo: What he says: “Woah, they smell good! Man, this is awesome. Thank you.” What he thinks: “Great. Now, I can’t stop smiling like an idiot.”

Masato: “You made this for me? I can’t express how honored I am to know that I was in your thoughts. I graciously accept these.” 


Reiji: “Chocolate made by _____? I just know it’s going to taste even sweeter than the other stuff! Thanks for the hard work!”

Ranmaru: “Huh? You…actually made these for me? I usually trash stuff like th–I guess it wouldn’t hurt to actually try these out. Thanks a lot.”

Ai: “For some odd reason, my heart has started racing. I’ve received chocolate before and I’ve never had that reaction. Oh, it must be this way because it was made by you?”

Camus: “Homemade chocolate? Hmph, you should know that I don’t take chocolate made by just anyone. So, consider yourself lucky.” 

anonymous asked:

I think you're really sweet and kind and supportive. I don't care if some of my friends think we shouldn't be friends because of some arbitrary age gap, you're one of the coolest people I know right now. Honestly, more teens should be like you. You really set a good example for how people should be just in general. You help inspire me to try and be a better person. Really, you're awesome. I hope we can become closer like with your IRL friends eventually.

:0cc woah man!!! thanks!! it means a lot that i inspire you,, i appreciate that you took the time to type this out omg <3 

Theory TIME!

I honestly think that the King of Planet Salad IS Vegeta. Universe 6 Vegeta, that is.

Maybe when Uni 7 goes to Uni 6 Planet Salad they’ll all be surprised because they’ll see themselves but different. We’ll probably only see Vegeta and Goku (well Kakarot). And maybe even Nappa or Raditz!!! How cool would it be to see those guys again but as GOOD Saiyans?!

I could be TOTALLY wrong on this but I just have a feeling Akira Toriyama will pull a trick like this on us. It’s so his style

Ps. OMG WHAT IF KYABE IS VEGETA’S SON IN UNIVERSE 6?! (I’m thinking too hard now woah, but WHAT IF MAN?!)

anonymous asked:

"how you talk down to and mistreat your fellow man" woah there. I mean, we might suggest to them that consuming animal products is a pretty unethical and environmentally unfriendly decision to make. Have some protests and direct action going on... but... mistreating them? Compared to the hell we put the animals through, that's a little..

Oh come off it. You vegans wouldn’t hesitate to violently attack your fellow man if you thought you could get away with it. We both know you think you’re morally superior Anon.

anonymous asked:

How about a scenario where Haise and ayato meet his so's dad without knowing it, and they end up being bros

this is as good as my sleep depriven brain will let me write i’M SORRY THIs is super shitty 

Slipping the coins into the venting machine, Ayato waits for his coffee to roll out. He could go to a coffee shop, but it’s just easier to get it here. The machine is taking it’s good old time, and he grunts under his breath lightly.

Another person walks up behind him, fumbling with the coins in his hands before putting any extra away. The younger male promptly ignores him, and curses to himself because the machine still hasn’t dispensed his coffee.

The other man seems to notice this a laughs lightly. “Machine not working?” Ayato twists his head sideways and catches a glimpse of the other, and he looks almost familiar. He nods his head and the stranger continues on talking. Ayato simply ignores him until he asks, “So, do you like rabbits?” And just like that, this complete stranger has his full attention.

They end up having a rather lengthy discussion on rabbits, coffee forgotten.


Haise’s standing in one of the aisles at a bookstore, flipping through the pages of Sen Takatsuki’s newest novel. He knows should just buy the book and read it when he gets home, as it’s getting late, but his brain decides that it doesn’t want to wait. So he’s still at the store, completely enraptured by the novel.

A small tap on his shoulder jolts him back to reality, and he turns to see a man. “Woah! Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to scare you!” Haise replies with a simple ‘no, it’s alright’, but before he can do anything else the stranger comments. “So, Sen Takatsuki? Aren’t her books amazing?” The ghoul investigator perks a little at this, and agrees. 

“Yes! Her books are amazing. I’ve been reading them as long as I can remember, I’ve always been fascinated by how she writes.”

The man nods, and rambles on about the author, and just books in general, and Haise is more than willing to contribute to the conversation.

He feels like he’s met this person before,  or at least someone like him. How the other man occasionally makes pointless hand gestures as he talks, even how he just rambles is familiar, but can’t put his finger on who it reminds him of.

The two talk for as long as they can before they are asked to leave by one of the workers. Turns out the store had closed 10 minutes ago.

  • Friend: *distressed*
  • Me: are you okay? Do you wanna Taco 'bout it?
  • F: ...it's nacho problem
  • Me: woah, sorry man. I didn't mean to get jalapeño business.
  • F: *sigh* have you been talking tamale?
  • Me: ...yeah, she said you had a bad queso depression............I just wanted to see if churro Kay.
  • F: I haven't been Verde happy.
  • Me: do you wanna go for a guac?
  • F: that wasn't a part of my flan. But okay
  • Oh man, oh man, oh man, not again
  • Yeah, I learned the game from William Wesley
  • You can never check me
  • Back to back for the niggas that didn't get the message
  • Back to back like I'm on the cover of Lethal Weapon
  • Back to back like I'm Jordan '96, '97
  • Whoa, very important and very pretentious
  • When I look back I might be mad that I gave this attention
  • Yeah, but it's weighin' heavy on my conscience
  • Yeah, and fuck, you left a boy no options
  • I wanna see my niggas go insane
  • You gon' make me step out of my fuckin' frame
  • You gon' make me buy bottles for Charlamagne
  • You gon' make me go out of my fuckin' way
  • I waited four days, nigga, where y'all at?
  • I drove here in the Wraith playin' AR-AB
  • I'm not sure what it was that really made y'all mad
  • But I guess this is what I gotta do to make y'all rap
  • I mean woah, can't fool the city, man, they know what's up
  • Second floor Tootsies, gettin' shoulder rubs
  • This for y'all to think that I don't write enough
  • They just mad cause I got the midas touch
  • You love her, then you gotta give the world to her
  • Is that a world tour or your girl's tour?
  • I know that you gotta be a thug for her
  • This ain't what she meant when she told you to open up more
  • Yeah, trigger fingers turn to twitter fingers
  • Yeah, you gettin' bodied by a singin' nigga
  • I'm not the type of nigga that'll type to niggas
  • And shout-out to all my boss bitches wife-in niggas
  • Make sure you hit him with the prenup
  • Then tell that man to ease up
  • I did another one, I did another one
  • You still ain't did shit about the other one
  • I got the drink in me goin' back to back
  • Yeah, goin' back to back
  • I got the drink in me goin' back to back
  • Yeah, I'm goin' back to back
  • I don't wanna hear about this ever again
  • Not even when she tell 'em that they better as friends
  • Not even when you sayin', "Drizzy, tell 'em again"
  • I been puttin' on a show, it was a sell out event
  • Oh, you need better seatin'
  • I didn't wanna do it, gave me every reason
  • The point I'm tryna make is I don't ever need 'em
  • Seen what you'd do for fame or what you'd do for freedom
  • Please, check 'em for a wire or a earpiece
  • Please, please do not let these niggas near me
  • Please, think before you come for the great one
  • Please, who's a real nigga and who ain't one?
  • Please, somebody stop me
  • I'm talkin' bousy and gwanin wassy
  • I got the fest in five days and it's my shit
  • Soon as a nigga hit the stage, they gon'
  • They gon' ask if I can play this shit back to back
  • Yeah, they want it back to back
  • They gon' ask if I can play this shit back to back
  • I took a break from Views, now it's back to that, nigga
  • Meek sit the fuck down