i mean i'm not gonna date you

  • harry: i'm sorry ginny...i've got to go and hunt horcruxes to stop voldemort...i have to break up with you because you'll be in danger too...
  • ginny: i mean, first off, dude's probably gonna take over hogwarts so technically i'll be in less danger if i go on your little soul-searching bff camping trip
  • ginny: second of all, i don't think voldy's gonna give a shit if we're dating or not when he murders me for being a 'blood traitor' or whatever bullshit reason
  • ginny: and thirdly, i am better at magic than you and ron combined so like, move over scrub, me and hermione are gonna be killing us some dark lord
  • justin, in the second ttazz: yeah idk i mean if you think taako and kravitz went on more dates then i guess that's canon for you..... i'm not gonna say if anything is canon tbh. they seemed happy i guess? but it's pretty awkward to roleplay this relationship since kravitz is played by griffin
  • justin, episode 68: and then taako RUNS to his BOYFRIEND that he MISSED SO MUCH and KISSES HIM and it's so BEAUTIFUL and they LOVE EACH OTHER so much he thought about him EVERY CHANCE HE GOT he would do ANYTHING for h

When a tarot reading gives you the answer you didn’t want but down in your heart you know it’s right

Originally posted by collegepsychexperiment

ok but SO MUCH happened in these tweets I’m still wrapping my head around all of it!  I’mma bulletpoint it:

  • they hired a new manager!  
    • nobody is more stressed out about it than dex
  • tater is texting bitty
    • you know that when bitty was on that point streak that Jack was bragging (gushing) about it to everyone within earshot
  • bitty and jack’s first valentine’s together
    • who’s surprised that Jack was 110% extra?
  • rans & holster planning for the future
    • I’m so stressed out about this actually like the thought of them fighting about it makes me so sad
  • SO MUCH nurseydex flirting.  
    • SO.  MUCH.
  • Tango is a Devils fan
    • I don’t know why I find this so endearing but I do.  does this mean Tango is from Jersey?
  • Jack requests that Bitty send him a selfie every morning
    • they are so gross
  • Bitty mentoring Whiskey!
    • even though whiskey is still hanging out with the lax bros
  • actually the most concrete confirmation we have in canon yet that Lardo and shitty are dating
    • I mean you could argue that the tweet only confirms that she’s dating a white person 
    • so you can pretend it’s like Camilla or whatever
    • but the way chowder talked about it as if it’s common knowledge who Lards is dating and we’ve only ever seen her in canon with Shitty
    • it basically confirms that she and shitty are an Established Relationship

And then there’s Bitty being not even remotely subtle, once again:

immediately followed by:

I mean JFC BITS.

wanna one as things i've heard at my school
  • Daniel: i had a dream where i let a bunch of cats out in ikea and everything kinda broke lose. it was catastrophic
  • Jihoon: looking forward to summer so i don't have to deal with you guys and your ugly lives.
  • Daehwi: i went on vacation for two weeks and the only part i remember is seeing a dog eat a corn on the cob.
  • Jaehwan: i'm not saying that you should all date me because i'm a sweetie pie but you should all date me because i am a fucking sweetie pie.
  • Seongwoo: you aren't born with a perfect face. i mean unless you're me.
  • Woojin: sometimes i think about what it would be like if everyone just like... stopped.
  • Guanlin: i have eaten nothing but hot pockets and red bull for 24 hours i have reached god level, i am unstoppable.
  • Jisung: it costs so much money to die man, like i can't even get a job how am i gonna pay 30000 dollars to die?
  • Minhyun: i live through my sims. like can i cook? fuck no! but you bet that my sim is the best fucking cook you've ever seen.
  • Jinyoung: did you know that pigeons delivered the results for olympic games? like imagine if they got the winner wrong and they have to send another pigeon and it flies in like "squawk squawk bitch you thought."
  • Sungwoon: when it's raining i just think about who hurt the cloud. why are you crying sweetie?

“Well, I guess that’s a meal, a date, and some handholding taken care of. Hopefully the kiss will happen someday before I die.”

“I mean….I did say I’d lead you through all of your firsts. You could do it now if you want.”

Chloé blinked and felt her heart do a strange little leap that made her chest tighten for reasons that had little to do with the resentment over her ruined date. “Wait. Seriously? 

my piece for the @miraculouspridezine! this goes with the fic an evening of firsts by the super talented @breeeliss 

insta | commission info

  • Karlie: "Taylor people on the internet are being really mean to me because I'm still dating Josh.."
  • Taylor: "I suppose I could step out with yet another boring, pasty male celebrity.."
  • Karlie: "I don't think that'll be good enough this time.."
  • Taylor: "What if I plant an article suggesting I've been dating a d-lister with the same name as your dog that still lives with his parents?"
  • Karlie: "Ugh thanks betch, I owe you one"
You Forgot Your Change!

A Shitty/Lardo meet-cute for a prompt I saw earlier today: You look like you can barely afford to eat out, and you still gave me the best tip I have ever received from a single person. [Also on AO3]

In theory, taking a job waiting tables at the posh restaurant near the yacht club was genius. Where better to make big tips than a place frequented by people who clearly had too much money?

Turns out, rich people didn’t tip that well. Lardo had no idea why, but it appeared to be the truth. She still needed the job, though, so she stuck with it. Art supplies weren’t cheap, and she had a show coming up.

Not that today is going to be much help for her art supply fund. She maybe shouldn’t have made the mistake of inadvertently insulting hyperrealism earlier, because now Beth Ann, who was hostess this afternoon, was assigning all the stingiest people she could find to Lardo’s section. It wasn’t even like Lardo had said it was bad! She just said it was technically impressive, but often compositionally uninteresting. It wasn’t like she’d memorized the portfolios of all her fellow servers.

Looking at the guy Beth Ann had just seated, she thought maybe she should consider it, just out of self-preservation. Because this guy didn’t look like he fit in with this restaurant’s usual clientele at all. He didn’t fit in with this entire side of town at all. He was wearing an American flag denim vest over a slogan tee, for god’s sake. He looked vaguely like a refugee from the set of Dazed and Confused; he looked like a dine-and-dash waiting to happen.

Still, she was a professional. Sort of. Whatever. She had standards, anyway. So she stepped up to the table in complete customer service mode and asked what she could get him.

“I dunno, man, you think I could start with a little light socialism?”

She blinked at him. She was generally prepared to deal with customers who went off script, but this was pushing it, even for her. “I’ll see what I can do about that. How about a drink while you wait for the revolution?”

Keep reading


“how long will this last? whatever this is..”


anonymous asked:

I? Am sobbing?? Another minjoon lover holy fuck it seems so rare this is gonna sounds stupid but like can you name some reasons why you love it bc i'm just curious cause FUCK THEY CUTE this is confusing my b ILY THO YOU'RE HILARIOUS AND CUTE ILY :'D


ok well i mean *cries*

they’re so CUDDLY

Originally posted by sosjimin

Originally posted by woogyuforever

namjoon dotes on jimin like crazy

Originally posted by taegied

Originally posted by mnnsuga

Originally posted by jitonic



yeah thats why they are my otp

i can’t believe
punisher series hasn’t even come out yet and kastle is already canon???????? TRULY iconic

I don’t think it’s so much that I’ve lost interest in BSD, as much as I’m kind of waiting for something new to spark my interest, because while I still enjoy the series, I want to discover something new that prompts the same level of interest and creativity.

  • Jason: *gets into Cass's date's van*
  • Jason: You know who I am?
  • Cass's Date: Uh, sorry you're Cass's brother.
  • Jason: Look, kid I'm sure you're a nice guy but you left your sock in my house and you took my little sister's innocence.
  • Jason: I'm gonna give you a twenty, and I want you to fill up your tank and I want you to clear out of here. Now, I'm asking you nicely.
  • Cass's Date: What about Cass?
  • Jason: Kid, if this van comes within a five mile radius of my house, I'll know it. 'Cause I can smell it. And then you and I are gonna have a visit, and I'm gonna spend some quiet time with you. Do I make myself clear?
  • Cass's Date: Sir, I just wanna let you know that I consider myself a student of philosophy. Live and let live, I mean no harm. To anyone.
  • Jason: I am an irrational hardass with rage issues. Don't piss me off.
  • Cass's Date: *takes the twenty*
anna kendrick and aubrey plaza answering the question that pisses every actor off
  • interviewer: what would you do if you werent acting?
  • anna kendrick: porn
  • anna kendrick: i mean just watching a lot of it, maybe a porn review person
  • aubrey plaza: i'm gonna go one step lower and say prostitution
  • anna kendrick: i think i would also review prostitutes, i would be like "at the top of her game as always!!!"
  • Clalec shipper: can't you just FEEL the tension between you and Alec?
  • Clary: not much anymore. I know we got off to a really rough start, but lately we've been understanding each other more and I think we might actually be friends one day
  • Clalec shipper: I mean SEXUAL tension
  • Clary: ......
  • Clary: bitch I'm in a fucking love hexagon where I'm dating my childhood BFF after my last fling turned out to be MY BROTHER follow e by having some weird Sexually ConfusingTM feelings for the hot forensic science nerd AND YOU REALLY THINK IM GONNA COMPLICATE THAT SHIT MORE BY GETTING THIRSTY OVER A GAY MAN???
'I'm gonna stay here tonight'
R1 Breakfast Show
'I'm gonna stay here tonight'

Some clips from the days after the Grace Jones show, featuring ‘Ten to five!!! You know I get up in a minute?!!’ and ‘Platonic bedsharing - a great idea for people who hate themselves’


anonymous asked:

Do you think that Jungkook was really following Yeri? I mean, I just watched the video and it seems kinda ridiculous. I gotta force myself into seeing that he was following her. Like why would people start a fuss over that video? It just might be the angles. But if they're really dating I'm all for it lol XD I want my baby boy to be happy. And Yeri is a great girl. But I doubt like 80% that they are dating forreal . Again, it's a lame proof. And we've never seen any interaction between them.

ok, obviously jikook is married bc satellite jeon, excuse you, so jungkook following her means jungkook cheated on jimin, they are having their papers for divorce ready, their kid, tae, is to be decided whether he stays with jimin or with jungkook, jungkook doesnt want to divorce cos that was a mistake, but jimin is adamant, he is gonna get jungkook’s ass smacked up for breaking his heart for following a different person. Jungkook hires a person to knock jimin off before their court, so Jimin is kidnapped, hence he misses the court. As he wakes up, he sees Jungkook smoking a cigarette, Jungkook chained Jimin to the bed in an unknown place. Will Jimin be able to escape? Will he be able to forgive Jungkook? You will see in the next episode next week. (well, even if he followed her, it means kinda nothing to me…if he followed her as he followed jimin, i’d see something suspicios, here I see that people are making an elephant out of a fly, that’s how dating rumors are born)

the foxes as the gay and wondrous life of caleb gallo quotes
  • <p> <b>Kevin:</b> i'm always prepared. unless, of course, prepared means sober....in which case i'm rarely prepared.<p/><b>Allison:</b> sometimes....things that are expensive....are worse.<p/><b>Matt:</b> he's not bi. me, i'm bi. i'm fresh. i'm hip.<p/><b>Andrew:</b> shoutout to me for instigating the shitstorm.<p/><b>Renee:</b> no, that was a phase. i'm catholic now.<p/><b>Aaron:</b> (how did you steal from mcdonald's?) you have to climb over the counter.<p/><b>Seth:</b> i'm a huge bitch.<p/><b>Dan:</b> okay, fine. i'll go on one date with him, and if i like him then we'll...get married.<p/><b>Neil:</b> i'm gonna take a wet shower.<p/><b>Nicky:</b> wha-what do they put in alcohol that makes it make me do this? what is that? like, if i - i will die if i drink more of that, y'know?....i gotta call my mom.<p/></p>