i mean i feel that way about the whole show

SDCC 2017 Rebecca Sugar interview

Rewind and Pause interviewed Rebecca Sugar in this fifteen-minute interview. Here’s a sorta-transcript–not word for word, but basically what the questions are and how she answered, paraphrased.

Question: A lot of the show’s symbolism is inspired by Utena. Can you discuss that show’s influence?

Rebecca: When I was a teen, that show was an epiphany for me! It plays with the semiotics of gender and I was a bisexual teen relating to it in a way I’d never related to anything before. The show is beautiful and I love that she decides she wants to BE a prince after being saved by a prince. And it’s also funny. It’s so extreme that it’s funny, and that was a huge influence on me as well, that something could be so dramatic and so beautiful but also wacky. It’s so extreme that it’s powerful at the same time as being funny. I got to see the origins and see Guys and Dolls at the Takarazuka Theater when I visited Japan. Osamu Tezuka grew up in that town! You know, Princess Knight, which has everything to do with Utena. I got to see some of the roots there and it was a big influence. Amazing.

Question: Another influence, especially lately, you can draw comparisons between Steven’s miracles and Christ figures. Are you exploring this, and potentially modernizing that allegory, with different kinds of love?

Rebecca: We’re inspired by every voice that has ever spoken about peace. I think–I’ve been reading about Hillel the Elder and how he said “If I’m not for myself, then who will be for me?” The gentleness with which he approached everything is really inspiring to me. I think that I’m very influenced by my Jewish upbringing. I’m half Jewish and was raised Jewish. I’ve felt the feeling of belonging but not belonging. I’ve been moved by this incredible history and this wonderful community that I wanted to understand and be a part of. That’s all been a big influence on the show as well. It was all about growing up with my brother, and that was a big part of my life. There’s a lot of spiritualism in the show.

Question: I wanna ask you about the color symbolism? And I’d be remiss if I didn’t say thank you for showing our community on TV. About Steven: His Gem is pink, his shield is pink, his sword is pink, his shoes are pink! It subverts the tropes of a traditional male hero. Was that intentional?

Rebecca: Oh, it’s COMPLETELY intentional. Yeah, I think one of the things I wanted to do as I went into the show was address how intensely gendered shows for children are and dissolve that. That was my first goal. And I think it came in large part because as a little kid I always gravitated toward boys’ shows, and I felt extremely guilty about that. And I don’t think my child self should have had to feel bad, but I understood “this is not really for me.” So as we went into this, I wanted NO ONE to have to feel that. I wanted everyone who wanted to, to feel it was for them. Especially since it’s gender nonconforming as a show.

Question: Silly question: Peridot and Lapis are roommates. What do you think their biggest pet peeves are of each other? If they have any, I mean.

Rebecca: Gosh. I think Lapis is sort of both annoyed and comforted by Peridot’s infinite energy. I often thought of them like the sort of old cartoon idea of a small dog and a big sort of like doesn’t-really-care dog. With a small very very excited dog. I felt that that was a dynamic for them. So I think that that, like those characters, it’s annoying to Lapis but she doesn’t actually dislike it.

Question: Congrats on the Emmy nomination!

Rebecca: THANK YOU!

Question: I hope we get to see “It’s Over, Isn’t It?” and “Both of You” during the Emmys. How do you feel?

Rebecca: I’m so excited, and I’m so glad it’s that one. It was such a fun dream to make a musical episode. I always loved those, they’re always my favorite. I couldn’t wait to do ours. Everyone was firing on all cylinders for that episode. I got to do music with Jeff Liu and Ben Levin, and Aivi and Surasshu’s compositions for the finals were stunning, the backgrounds are incredible, the art is so beautiful, it’s Jeff Liu and Joe Johnston’s last board together, it was one of the last episodes I got to work on with Ian before he left to do his show, so it also has a special place in my heart, I remember seeing it come back and being in the edit bay watching it and my eyes were welling up because “this is it, this is everything I ever wanted.”

Question: Not to mention Deedee crushing it.

Rebecca: She’s amazing! And that was when she was doing Tommy! So we got her on a day she’d been doing shows all day, and she came and knocked that out.

Question: First take?

Rebecca: We did several, but all of those takes were amazing. I love writing songs for Deedee. And that one, it has some notes in it that I cannot hit. But I know Deedee can do it.

Question: Now when you write songs, you hear a lot of the demos you write on ukulele a lot, but you play other instruments. Do you find that you write differently depending on what instrument you’re writing for?

Rebecca: Yes! Oh, completely. I have my go-to ukulele chords. But I also like to write songs on the omnichord, which is like a synthetic harpsichord from the 80s. And it has a row of buttons, you hit a button and you get that chord. I can use it for experimentation for chords I might not have thought of. I got one off eBay, the OM-84, and it was a little buggy, it wouldn’t play right, would go out of tune, and I took it to get it looked at, and these incredibly corroded batteries fell out of it! With this cloud of red dust! So I can’t put batteries in it anymore. But I can plug it in and it still works.

Question: So for “Love Like You,” is it connected to any of the characters or any point of view, or was it more a one-off?

Rebecca: “Love Like You” is so unusual. It started as a point-of-view song for all Gems, and the thesis of the whole show, sort of toward Steven, and my own brother Steven, but because it was the credits, I wrote the song over three years in little pieces. I thought at the start that this is about an alien that’s looking at a human, who loves them, and the secret meaning of this is that they don’t have the capacity to feel this way. By the middle of it I was deep into the show and going through a real crisis of confidence, where I was like “why are people looking to me? It’s not right!” and these people were coming out of the woodwork to thank me for the show, people who had been able to speak to their families in these wonderful new ways, people who had become comfortable with themselves in these incredible ways that I had not been able to do! Where I was like “I’m so inspired by everyone! Why are they thanking me?” So the middle of the song I was sort of in that place. And about a year later, I realized the beginning was not what I had thought it was about at all. It’s not a secret meaning about an alien who doesn’t understand humans. It’s about the fact that I had always loved my brother and had these people who would love me unconditionally in my life, and because of my insecurity I had not been able to be there for them 100%, and I realized this was maybe one of the most human things I’d ever written, and I had written it by accident. So I got to conclude it. It was seriously written over 3 years.

Question: Recently we talked about how the show has been dramatic and full of conflict. It’s great but do you ever have concerns about taking the show–it’s a very positive show, so does the conflict have the potential to go too far, or do you like making it more challenging?

Rebecca: I’m excited to be more ambitious with the story, and the danger they’re experiencing also feels like a danger for us who are writing the show. Writing stories that are more ambitious and challenging. It feels necessary, because it’s about how love conquers all, but you can’t write that story without showing what comes up against that. I’m excited to explore the–you’re right, it’s scary to explore where hate comes from in a show about love. I want to–it’s a challenge to stay positive while exploring that. But that’s a challenge I experience in LIFE. And that’s a challenge we’re all experiencing right now. So it also feels like the time to explore that in myself and in the show.

If they weren’t going to give us Arya x Gendry

Then they should not have let us see him look at her like this:

and like this:

and like this:

and like this:

or done this:

and they should never, ever have given us this:

But they did.

So yeah we know how Gendry feels about Arya. It’s all over his face.

The terrible life of Lena Luthor

And why I love her so much and she deserves the world.

First, let’s keep in mind that canonically Lena’s only 24 years old, according to the show’s timeline.

Now, in season 2 Lena was in 12 episodes. During those episodes, she was in danger/manipulated/hurt (physically and emotionally) 37 times.  Specifically, she almost died 8 times and in 5 of those times she was the target. She was hit once and knocked down and kidnapped twice.

Her own bother was the one behind the attempts against her life at the beginning . She was also constantly manipulated and lied to by her mother and later by her new mother figure/mentor. So it’s usually people close to her and people that she cares about  who end up hurting her.

Let’s also remember that the events of season two happened in less than a year! I wonder how she seems so unfazed by all of her trauma. You would think she would at least have some kind of PTSD by now. Then again, this show hasn’t been great at tackling this subject.

Also, from what we’ve seen of season three this trend of her almost dying and getting hurt isn’t going to stop. What does she have to do to get a break?! I think it’s fair to say that Lena seriously needs a therapist and a bodyguard. Also all the love.

Let’s break down everything she’s been through (that we know) and who she is despite all of that. With gifs! 


Before National City. 

- Her biological mother died when she was four.

- Lionel lied to her and never told her he was her biological father.

- Was given the cold shoulder by Lillian and was constantly manipulated and reminded that she wasn’t a real Luthor.

- The brother she loved turned out to be evil.

- After her brother went to jail and she took over Luthor Corp her boyfriend at the time made her choose between him and her family’s company.


Now, during the show:

2x01

1. She was supposed to be on the Venture.

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anonymous asked:

will i ever get over isak asleep on even's chest and even looking up like he's so thankful to the universe for getting to have isak

and it’s something he purposefully showed him by putting it in the video?? He wants him to know he’s grateful to have him?

Even is such a demonstrative person, in both words and actions. I don’t think he leaves Isak in the slightest doubt about how much he loves him but, with all that, I get the idea he still feels like it isn’t enough? Like, he hasn’t gotten across just how much he loves him? This video is him trying to bridge that gap, trying to capture what Isak means to him and how thankful he is to have him. Showing it in a way Isak (and the whole world) could see it. :`)

It’s why the Nattergal lyrics were so apt too:

You would last for days, write you in different colors, you should’ve known
I have way too big plans, I wish you knew, I’m only yours, yours, yours, yours

I was talking about it on my twitter the other night but the reply on this post helps put into perspective of the point I was trying to get at, so i’m going to reiterate it here now that I have a clearer understanding of what i was trying to say:

I know a lot of SP fans have been anticipating when we get to see stuff like Craig and Tweek kiss or have more expressions of physical affection for each other to validate to the audience their love for each other, and don’t get me wrong, while I’d be more than thrilled to see that in canon too, I was thinking about the fact that I personally don’t feel a need to see it nor do I expect it?
I’m not watching South Park episodes banking on “when are they going to have an episode where Craig and Tweek kiss” and I don’t really get torn up when I see them not sitting next to each other in the background of new episodes and so forth, and think there’s a couple of reasons for that. 

One being I feel like it doesn’t really match up with the storytelling style of the show. The way South Park tends to portray relationships between the kids was never really built on seeing tons of physical puppy love affection from them unless there is a specific reason to (In the case with Heidi and Cartman it was to contrast how out of character that feels for him, and that relationship went to shit pretty fast anyways), and honestly, the show has already given us way more than I would have ever dreamed possible for a ship like Creek to get. I mean, they get a whole episode about learning how to communicate and a huge focus in the new game. 

Then the other reason is because Craig and Tweek’s relationship is written so explicitly in showing that they are together, you don’t really, need to see that to validate the fact that they love and care about each other? I think a lot of fans are waiting for them to have some magical kiss or whatever to prove they are in love, but what’s interesting about the show is like the comment in the post I linked above stated, Matt and Trey did completely skip the puppy love part of a relationship in writing Craig and Tweek and jump right into the parts that really show how much you love someone in the more subtle but powerful ways. Not only that but it seems that they use idea of people wanting to see the two be affectionate as the specific thing they parody, via the yaoi art, etc. which matches up because most of the fans create their own content to indulge in that aspect of their relationship. 

Due to that I feel like a lot of that side of their relationship is going to be kept framed in that yaoi art parody context. HOWEVER, that’s not necessarily a bad thing because if you are someone who isn’t familiar with this aspect of a relationship, it might go over one’s head, but the way Craig and Tweek’s relationship is written is with a huge focus on healthy communication and learning to work through problems and just being there for each other and supporting each other. This is all the stuff that comes into a relationship that will literally make or break it once you get past all the initial hand holding and kissing and cuddling fun part of it. It’s the part that requires all the actual work and really says how much do you care about this person and whether or not you are compatible in a healthy way. People are individuals and there will always be times where you will argue or fight with someone no matter how much you love them, and what matters is how those issues are handled.

The fact that this is the part of the relationship between Craig and Tweek that is focused on, especially from the standpoint of them actually working through their differences and wanting to be together says 1000x more about how much they really love each other than any on-screen kiss will. You don’t need to see them physically show how much they love each other because it’s literally all right there in how they interact with each other by creating a solid foundation that will allow them to stay together as a couple in the long run.

I find it super interesting that this is what the focus became for their canon relationship because not only is it just validating how GOOD of a relationship Craig and Tweek have, it’s also saying that people will always argue and have disagreements no matter what and this is what a real relationship takes, this is how two people learn to work through their differences to be together in a healthy way. It’s teaching a beautifully mature lesson about loving someone else (intentional or not, I’m at a loss) and it is a million times more validating in why I find Craig and Tweek’s relationship so satisfying as is and just a WONDERFUL portrayal of relationships on a bigger scale, not just in giving LGBT representation. 

Not to compare to SU, but I find Craig and Tweek’s relationship to be more powerful for relationship representation as a whole than say even Ruby and Sapphire’s relationship because even though they DO have on-screen kissing and cuddling, you don’t really get to see the characters exist outside of each other or work through relationship issues in a way that really shows who they are as individuals and what it is that builds their love for each other because they weren’t written to exist outside of each other. Ruby and Sapphire were written to be a relationship and in a way that flattens them as characters and makes it hard to see them beyond that. Meanwhile, Craig and Tweek were already solidly defined characters on their own so you know that they could easily break up and go off on their own narrative-wise because that’s how they were before, so the fact that they do work through their issues and stay together is so much more powerful and teaches so much more. 

The TLDR point: Craig and Tweek have such a wonderfully written relationship that you don’t really need to see puppy love or kissing from them to prove what is obviously already there, and that’s why I’m perfectly content just indulging in that part of their relationship in fandom instead of seeing it in canon because canon already gave us the most important and best part of a good relationship.  

I feel like I should make a post about this because it’s really bothering me to see all that ‘Tom Holland has a frog in his mouth stuff’ on my dash.
Yes, the first post may have been funny, I laughed about it too. But this is getting out of hand. My dash is full of this meme and I just find it to be immature and really not funny anymore.
This is bullying. And I don’t care what you say and if you didn’t mean it that way because you can’t control how another person feels about this. Tom said that he got bullied in school so do you really think that making a meme about how he looks is really the right way to show him your love?
I’ve experienced something like this myself. People mocking you about stuff “just for fun” and “they don’t mean it” or they mean it in an affectionate way. But it still hurts and it still damages your self-esteem even if it’s just meant in a funny way.
So to sum this up. This whole “Dave the frog” meme is in my eyes just immature and straight up bullying and I feel like some people should overthink the stuff they’re posting right now because I really don’t want to know what happens when Tom sees this.

Being an actor with Dick Grayson

•Dick Grayson was arguably one of the most liked and attractive actor.

•He always had scenes in movies where he was doing some kind of trick or had clothes that showed off his muscles.

•Being casted for the Nightwing movie, people were absolutely thrilled.

•Fans said it was because he can do all his gymnastic tricks.

•But we all know it was the tight suit that got everyone hot and flustered.

•You never been in a movie with Dick Grayson, but have worked closely with his mutuals like Jason Todd or Damian Wayne.

•They always told you how funny Dick was.

•Dick was known to be quite the flirt with his co actors.

•And a co actor you were.

•The first meeting between you two he gave you a long and lingering hug.

•"I’m glad I get to work with someone cute this time.“

•He insisted on practicing the scripts at his house with you.

•Sometimes he gasps at the stuff he reads.

•"Y/N we have to kiss 7 times in the movie.”

•"Really?“

•"Yeah, would you like to practice now?”

•Dick was always known to mess up the most.

•"Y/N I care so much for you… I want everything-pfff hahaha.“

•"CUT.”

•He once kissed you too long.

•"CUT. Dick, only kiss Y/N for about 4 seconds.“

•"Where’s the fun in kissing if I have to count?”

•There was one scene where you had to slowly take off Dick’s suit for a sensual and touching moment of the film.

•It was touching until Dick blurted out.

•"This is turning me on so much right now.“

•"CUT. DICK!”

•Surprisingly he messed this part up the most and you had to take off his suit.
Several. Several. Times.

•Dick also has the record for the most stunt fails.

•Imagine Dick jumping onto a raining rooftop and him slipping.

•And imagine Dick accidentally hitting himself with his weapon.

•He makes the whole cast laugh. A lot.

•Going to night shows with him was the best.

•He’s the one that goes undercover to work at some food place or something.

•He’s the celebrity that accidentally reveals his feelings on air.

•"Y/N is great! I mean, I wish I can get her number or something… uh..“

•"What better way to ask me in front of thousands of people.” You replied with a smile.

•After that night magazines went crazy over Dick’s accidental confession.

•The whole cast teased him about it.

•One of the best things about Dick is that he’ll hang out with the little kids dressed up in superhero costumes.

•He doesn’t care much for publicly and secretly visits the children dressed up as Nightwing.

•Dick will sign literally everyone’s stuff until nothing else can be signed.

•He’s a big advocate for safety and always partners with companies who help teach kids that.

borderlinemangle  asked:

every damn time i see that scene of jon kissing sansa's forehead i combust THAT IS ONE OF THE MOST ROMANTIC SCENES IN THE WHOLE DAMN SHOW THERE IS NOT A SINGLE PLATONIC MOMENT IN THAT SCENE HOW CAN ANYONE LOOK AT THAT AND NOT SAY THAT JON AT LEAST FEELS SMTHN NON PLATONIC FOR SANSA AT LEAST IF NOT ACTUAL LOVE

TELL ME ABOUT IT!!! T_T 

There’s no way it’s platonic. 

I mean… just look at this: 

Originally posted by daughterofwinterfell

Look at the way he’s looking at her!! 

It’s beautiful and romantic. Emphasis on the romantic part. <3 

Bless these two! 

Imagine Merle having enough of you being utterly oblivious to his feelings for you

(Just a little fluffy request for Merle :3 I’ve been having some writer’s block lately but listening to music and thinking about Merle helped me get through it xD Sorry if it’s short but I tried my best! Hope it is as requested and you all like it :3 Gif not mine/found it on google/credit to the original owners.)

Laying in his tent, Merle stared at the starry sky through it’s see-through roof and couldn’t stop smiling.

He thought to himself over several nights before as to why he felt so happy at the end of a tiring day but soon enough came to an obvious conclusion, you.

You were the reason that made his heart feel so full and at ease during a time of chaos and crisis. He knew it was your wit and kindness that would make him get out of breath at the thought of you and just couldn’t believe you were making him feel like a little boy with a crush all over again.

He liked your fearlessness, the way you had no problem putting him in his place with the contrast of your gentleness whenever he got himself in danger, it all made him weak for you.

Your eyes and lips as you’d look at him was enough to make him fantasize about you, truly nearly everything about you he wanted for himself.

The only problem, he thought and it made him frown a little, was that you were utterly oblivious when it came to his flirting, even worse any kind of signal from him didn’t seem to affect you at all.

Each time he’d look over at you, his genuine smile would come out, multiple times a day it would happen, he thought you would knew from that gesture but apparently not at all.

He’d also keep staying by your side and talking to you, thinking you should feel it from the way he would act around you but nothing but still you didn’t seem to notice anything.

Even everyone else around had seem to pick up on him and oddly enough, they seem to accept it and let it all happen seeing all his true efforts to be kind and loving to you, but you’d just laugh him off or treat him like any other of your friends, and that wasn’t at all the result his heart wanted.

At this point, he was so frustrated and so hung up on you, he let out a loud sigh, frowning, and was crossing his arms tightly to grip onto his sleeping bag to himself.

He grumbled over it and it started to bother Daryl that was laying just right beside him. He sighed as well and turned over, half awake and asleep.

“What again? Aren’t you supposed to sleep already?”

“Nothing, Darylina! Mind your own business!”

He was just so annoyed by your ignorance he let it sip out to his younger brother, again. It happened so often, Daryl would usually just turn back to his side and go back to sleep, letting his brother wait in the night by himself but this time he had enough as well.

He couldn’t stand this endless desperation coming from him and wasn’t going to let it go either.

“No! Not until you get your shit together…Damn it Merle…Are really that into Y/N…”

Merle got quiet, thinking about his words and tried to be nonchalant about it but came out rather adamant about his feelings for you.

“What kind of question is that…Of course I am…She’s the only one that gets me…The only one that makes me laugh and gets me hard at the same time!”

Daryl groaned in disgust to those words and said, “Obviously not…”

At those words, Merle glared over at Daryl, pouting in disgust to what he just said. The younger man shrugged and got cozier in his sleeping bag.

“Look I didn’t mean it to piss you off…I was just saying Y/N…Is the type of girl you need to be direct with…”

Merle’s face went sour and he scoffed, listening to his brother speaking.

“What do you know about girls Darylina…If anything I-”

“Well I know Y/N…”

At that Merle shut his mouth up and realized that he wasn’t wrong at all. You and Daryl hung out together so much he couldn’t deny he got envious of your friendship at some point.

“And from the way she takes things…you gotta be blunt with her! So stop messing around and trying to get her to ask you first…You ain’t that special! If you want her then go get her! Now let me sleep in peace…”

They both looked away from one another and finally Merle understood he was at an end. He was going to have to make himself weak for you and hopefully get you to understand him.

~~~~~

The sun shined through your tent and lazily you started to get prepared for the day. Quickly, you changed yourself into some other clothes and started packing in order to start moving forward for the day.

You felt sudden and sharp thuds rumbling through the ground and wonder as to whose footsteps could be so heavy at such an early morning.

A short and ragged breath could be heard on the outside, and you felt like you knew who it was. You got closer to your zipped door but suddenly, Merle spoke.

“Y/N?! You awake?!”

His tone and was sharp and direct, sounding as if he had a problem against you. He was tapping his toe and starting to feel his stomach forming a knot.

He was nervous as hell, he was acting out out of impulse again but this time it was for something serious and he could feel it eating at him. The thought of you rejecting him or laughing him off and making fun of him, actually scared him.

He knew if you would turn him away it would break him apart and that feeling was already starting to form within him.

It stunned you to hear him so early in the morning, considering he’d usually wake up in the afternoon once everyone was packed and ready.

You let out your surprise and stuttered at the unexpected request.

“Oh…Merle?! Euh…Yeah! Yeah, i’m awake why…”

“C-Can you come out? And meet me…It’s important…”

Your brows furrowed at the word “important” and couldn’t deny that your curiosity had been more than piqued. Quickly, you tried to shove everything in your bag.

“S-sure…Just hold-”

“No! Now…Please I need to get this damn thing off my chest…”

He was getting sweaty and not from the morning heat or anything, it was out of pure nervousness. Wiping his sweat off his forehead, he rested his hands on his waist, still trying to look imposing for your sake.

The sound of the tent’s zipper opening up, only seemed to echo loudly at that moment and made him swallow the lump in his throat, upon realizing how close he was going to get to his little moment.

His heart was racing and as your head peered out, he felt like running out of air. He turned away to calm himself down, closing his eyes and whispering under his breath to reassure himself.

“It’s alright…It’s ok…It’ll be all good…If she ain’t want you, Merle, it’s fine! I don’t need her…”

Too busy to even notice you, he jumped at the feeling of your warm hand tapping his shoulder.

“Oh Lord! Y/N, you scared me shitless here! What the hell?!”

You wanted to burst in laughter to have startled him so easily but held it in as much as you could for his dignity.

“Sorry about that…So what was it that you wanted to “get off your chest”“

As you talked, he completely zoned out, staring at you and hearing your soft voice, had amazed him and the simple fact of being the first to see you so early in the morning was enough to make his heart flutter.

It wasn’t something he ever felt and he knew he wouldn’t be to find it anywhere else but by your side. He quickly turned away from you, hiding his embarrassment and biting his damn tongue before to prepare himself for what he was going to say.

“Just follow me…”

He couldn’t bring himself to tell you right there with everyone that could hear him being so soft, still he had a reputation to maintain he thought so it was better to talk to you in private.

It really threw you off to hear him ask for to talk in private but nonetheless you trailed behind him as he moved forward.

~~~~

He walked into the woods at a steady yet fast pace, in hopes to get there as soon as he could.

Once the calming breeze could be heard, he stopped himself and took a few deep breaths. He turned to look at you and ended up bumping into you as you had followed him so closely.

His reflex made him catch you right before anything could happen and just like that, you both stared at each other in the eyes.

He was about to faint at that point and he just was fighting through his words to find the right things to say, only to remind himself of how clueless you were to him.

That thought made his desire for you to know his feelings for you even stronger and suddenly his nervousness subsided, his grip on you tightened and he pulled you even closer to him.

Glaring down at you, he let himself loose.

“You…I gave you so many damn hints so you can notice…But you ain’t ever…Why didn’t you?!”

Confusion struck you again and truly wondered as to what was happening, why was he holding you so tight, why was he his close and why did he had to look so damn hot, you thought.

From your angle, you could see the inside of his shirt and couldn’t stop blushing and looking away but still your eyes came back on him. It truly mad you question yourself on whether you liked him strictly as a friend or wanted more.

As you looked up at him, he shook his head, repeating his question.

“Why didn’t you ever?! I mean I really only got you on my mind here?! Is that hard to notice?!”

He was starting to get red, his lips were quivering in uncertainty and he truly looked defeated and lost. He looked less and less like a sex beast and started to resemble a disappointed kid.

It honestly made you smile and let out a chuckle to see him that way over something about you not noticing him? Really, you weren’t paying much attention to his words and his whole body and presence were all way too distracting so up close.

He gripped you even tighter and was growling out of frustration at this point. You were laughing again and

“I’m serious…Can’t you read my damn eyes! I’m practically being a bitch for you! Showing off how I like you! Why don’t you feel it? I mean my face is so obvious! It can’t be anymore obvious than this! Are you even listening?!”

He gave you a slight shake and you just stared at him stunned from what he just admitted. You were speechless, how couldn’t you have figured it out, you thought.

He was being somewhat obvious enough the more you reflected on his past actions but still no words. It exasperated him and his gaze softened, thinking for certain his heart was a few moments from being broken into pieces.

He gave a last try to his determination and he loosened his grip, pulling back slightly and looking at you worried.

“Are you gonna keep acting this clueless? Just laugh it over? Is this what you’re gonna do every day?”

He shook you slightly, desperately wanting an answer from you and let out his last hopes for you to return the feelings.

“Please do something…Or at least say something…This is dumb to say…But my goddamn heart is about to explode…I can’t stop loving you…I’m serious…I really am…”

He looked down to his feet as his hands trembled while holding you. He was getting fearful at this point, he had never confessed such deep stuff that made him look like an utter wuss to anyone.

He didn’t knew what to say or do apart from sulk if anything went wrong. He kept repeating under his breath, “I’m serious, I’m serious…” over and over and at that point you couldn’t ignore him anymore.

You knew you had to say and do something to ease his heart. It would be a lie if you told him you didn’t like him, otherwise you would’ve flat out reject him the moment he’d invite you this far, so you smiled.

Slowly, you moved your hands up to cup his cheeks and bring his gaze back to you. It startled him and once again his heart was beating a thousand mile an hour.

He couldn’t properly process what was going on but whatever it was, he just didn’t want you to let go of him yet. He noticed your smile, with you like this and so close, for a good moment he felt the time stop.

He felt you stroking his cheeks and closed his eyes as he let out a relieved sigh to feel your softness and warmth so close. At your chuckle, his eyes fluttered opened to meet your gaze.

“Ok…I get it Merle…I get it now…You like me…You like me a lot and worked hard to get me to notice you…But me being me didn’t realize it until you had to bring me here to explain it all…and now you’re tired and want to know how I feel about you…”

He took a deep inhale and breathe out, nodding carefully after listening to you. He felt your footsteps inching closer along with your whole self and wonder as to what you had in mind.

“Then let me blunt about it…”

At that, he felt your lips pressing onto his and quickly your tongue delving into his mouth, kissing him as sloppily as you could.

At that, a satisfied and hungry growl came out of him, making him wrap his arms around you and practically picking you up to hold in his arms.

Finally, his work payed off and he was not about to let his well deserved reward run away, as he’d suddenly lay you down onto the dirt, straddling you and smirking at you.

Tags : @pan-and-proud-writes, @ivy475, @fancypinkpigeon, @happyshaddow94@sc1525, @professsionalsinner, @firths-colins, @nikkinikki97, @greek-freak101, @madamrogers, @officergrimes-daddydixon, @picturepowderinabottle, @grabaknifeandendmylife, @unlaceddoll, @nekodalolita, @shortoneofabakersdozen,  @ichimaruai,  @master-of-schadenfreude

One of the things that assures me something actually fucky is going on is when the nurse talks about John’s blog in TLD. This has been discussed before but do you ever really think about it???
It stands out. In every previous episode, it was established that John’s blog was super popular and everyone knew he wrote it.
Then, the nurse acts like she doesn’t know who John is, and that Sherlock writes the blog, when everyone before that point knew otherwise?
Then, she says the most meta statement of them all, “It’s gone a bit downhill.”
It’s never explained why she doesn’t know John, or what made the blog go downhill, and it’s never brought up again. This isn’t bad writing; it’s genuinely fucking strange.
The whole exchange is puzzling. Unless Mofftiss had/have a plan and purposefully wrote a false narrative, use that scene as a way to make the audience question reality, and acknowledge that a lot of the audience probably thinks the show is going downhill.
Otherwise, this scene has no purpose, and I really can’t stress enough that there’s a difference between bad writing, and this scene that makes me feel like I’m in an alternative universe every time I think about it.
*Moriarty voice* It’s not reeaaaallll.
I mean, listen I really love TLD and out of all the episodes, I think the events in that one really do happen, so I think this scene is a clue to the false narrative of the whole season rather than a signal TLD is fake.

anonymous asked:

idk if you know what teen wolf is or have seen it but there's a scene where one of the characters talks about emotional tethers and how someone can "bring someone back" (and the whole fandom sees it as a romantic thing) and idk why but that made me think about when lance "brought" keith back when he was going after lotor and now i'm crying in the club

ohh no I haven’t seen that show ;v;

I’m not sure if I’d read that as inherently romantic, but I think it does mean he values how Lance feels about things and Lance is able to get through to him when others can’t, in a way it’s like he’s watching out for him and Keith can trust him to do that 8′)

anonymous asked:

Fraaaaan, Sero so handsome. What about BakuSero ?

A good ship I might draw something for in the near future! :D if inspiration doesn’t leave me again, that is

Anon said: I don’t know if you said anything but is there a reason you haven’t drawn anything haikyuu related lately? Not complaining but just interested why?

Hmmmmm there’s a few reasons I’ve talked about on various occasions in the past, stuff that goes from “the manga isn’t all that inspiring atm” to “the fandom isn’t responding in a way that makes me want to share more” and also “reposters sure are a pain aren’t they”, but lately I’ve been thinking that I really wouldn’t mind drawing some hq’s again so! Don’t think about those too much, consider it just a temporary hiatus :D

Anon said: Rude quiestion i know and im sorry but, will you draw some haikyuu stuff again or…?

I will! Can’t promise my focus won’t shift on other characters once I’ll start again, or generally be more spread out through everyone instead of focusing on a couple like I was doing before, but I will!

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I love your meta but omg I just had a thought of another parallel with Dean's behavior in Cas' absence. 7x13 and 12x18 of course there are obvious differences (Dean actually saw Cas die, they had just lost Bobby) They hadn't even been to Purgatory yet but still I feel Dean was grieving for Cas was intense as what we saw last week and caused him to seek a distraction (that was nearly his downfall I might add )

Thank you *hug* :)

I see that very much, yes. I mean…. there are a lot of pining!Dean episodes throughout the years I guess due in large part to the *Cas can’t be in too many episodes and he must be kept at arms length from Dean at all costs until it’s relevant to make them seem desperately in love but then lets rip them apart cos no homo and no romance in this show or at least not just yet but wait and see maybe we will maybe we won’t, come back next season to find out!* fun times we get with SPN….and….breathe….

I mean yeah, generally Dean’s coping mechanism is to “bury it” (I just watched 5x11 today and I love that episode, it just explores so much of both the boys psyche and this is exactly it for Dean (AND ITS ANOTHER ANDREW DABB EPISODE, AAAH! ok if you follow me you will know I keep finding out my favourite episodes are nearly all Dabb at the moment, like, this is the 2nd in 30 minutes and I just can’t with this man, I love him so much, I have so much faith in him now he had better follow through dammit).

I have this kind of…. random ass vague timeline of Dean’s emotional journey regarding Cas which I in no way am saying is exactly right but for me its an approximation anyway:

season 4 ‘wow he’s freaking hot but a dick….oh no, wait, maybe he isn’t?‘ 
season 5 ‘ok but, like, theres this weird buzz in my gut when i see him’ 
season 6 ‘man i miss him what the hell?’
season 7 'i miss him so much wtf is wrong with me
season 8 resignation that he probably loves him but doesn’t want to
season 9 resignation that he does love him but can’t have him
season 10 MoC so dulled emotions and pain, mostly 'i don’t deserve him’ season 11 'i don’t know what to do about it, i don’t deserve him and i don’t know how he feels about me anyway’
season 12 'i definitely love the bastard, this sucks but also i think he loves me too but i don’t know what to do about it at this point or how to know for sure’ and then BAM 12x12 and where we are now….

So yeah, season 7′s loss and Dean’s general pain and angst was intense and we all know it was due to a number of things but one of the main ones was losing Cas and I believe also the way in which he lost Cas that was so devastating. The whole “Cas, black goo” thing, clearly shows where his feelings are really hurting on top of the subtext through that whole time. I mean, in season 7 they’re nowhere near the emotional point that they are at now, it’s halfway through their journey so far, its just so much worse stronger now…

I only wrote a post yesterday talking about how the sexual encounters in SPN are often coded as ‘wrong/bad’ and for Dean meaningless sex is a recurring, consistent coping mechanism for his emotional turmoil. It’s no surprise that Dean had a one night stand with the Amazon and the waitress in 12x11 whom it’s only implied he had sex with and then the waitress in 12x18 which is canon that he had sex with. 

It’s important to note the comparison between 12x11 and 12x18 and remember what has changed since then? Well, his worry for CAS has been the main factor in both the lead up to the sex in these episodes and in no way do I think that is a coincidence that as his worry gets worse so does the implication of sex and the nature of his interactions with the waitress (basically that they become less of a ‘person’ and more of a ‘thing/distraction/plot device’ in the way they are portrayed).

Both of these are clear distractions from his pain. I mean, I’m NOT saying that all of Dean’s pain in s7 or s12 are due to Cas, of course it’s not, there are a lot of factors, there are the overriding story arcs, though these don’t usually factor massively into Dean’s psychological state, it’s more the emotional side that hits him so I think it’s more Mary and Sam’s lying and they massively factor into what he is currently ‘burying’ but especially with 12x18 it is CLEAR that he is suffering due to Cas, even wondering if he has turned up dead somewhere and all the subtext shouts this aswell as the text with his worry for Cas at the start and all Jensen’s tells and ALL the excellent meta about the waitress… which I’ll just link @postmodernmulticoloredcloak just in case as their meta is awesome on this.

Re: 7x13 I remember thinking at the time (before I even really hard core shipped Dean and Cas) that Dean’s face looked so UNSATISFIED when he lays down at the end with the Amazon.… it is so, clearly a total distraction lay and I can only imagine the 12x18 lay would be exactly the same or even more so. 

I love Jensen’s acting, he really can tell a story with his micro expressions and this ties back into 12x18 so closely - before he gets up to speak to the waitress he literally for a split second has a dead look in his eyes before plastering a smile on and when he sits back down the next morning and looks kind of happy and relaxed for about 15 seconds it then immediately fades as his reality comes crashing back down with the subtly of a hammer in the subtext that it wasn’t the omelette that he wanted but the pancakes and he has to settle

I just got another ask about 12x19 and, well, its going to be painful as hell, because we can see Dean suffering and in season 7 when he found Cas again at least Cas didn’t know who he was so he couldn’t have come to find Dean.

NOW? Cas has been most probably to all intents and purposes (to Dean anyway) been on Earth and not answering his calls… or prayers most probably at this point in Dean’s desperation. 

This is gonna hurt him like hell. And what does Dean do when he is in pain?

He burys it.

And he gets angry.

anonymous asked:

This week's big debate seems to be about Cas and humanity. I've read posts that are both excited and upset about how it seems like Cas is eventually going to choose to become human. I was wondering if you had any insight into whether that's a good thing or a bad thing for him, or if he should choose to stay an angel.

Heya! :) I am going to answer this to the best of my ability which is a liiittle bit loopy and over-tired today :P 

But yeah I have been scrolling my dash and I am not dead yet so I have seen this discussion going on :D I sort of feel like I haven’t got much to say about it in a way that I haven’t said/agreed with before (so it’s been redundant to weigh in), but like… riiiight back when I was a Fandom Newbie and getting to know the lay of the land and I just got absorbed right into the general fandom consensus at that time among the groups of meta writers I glommed onto… 

I mean, because I showed up after 9x18, and then though of course I was around for the following episodes I really started the whole circus of new episode reactions along with everyone, with season 10… between tearing apart the Cas stuff in 9x18 and then the Cas and Hannah stuff in 10x01-3 it just seemed really really obvious where Carver was going with it, and what it meant to Cas? And I mean okay this was 3 (4?) years ago but I also feel like with Cas’s development getting stalled over and over and over except in tangential ways, this was all put on ice like 3 times over before he even got possessed by Lucifer, so the MAJOR work on this was between the last minutes of 8x23 and 10x18 and even then that’s the STORYTELLING of it, and of course Cas himself puts the whole thing on ice as something he has the luxury to think about in 9x09. (Except for the one peanut butter and jelly conversation.)

So in 9x18 the MAJOR thing is that the lyrics “loneliness is a coat you wear” are laid over Cas taking off the coat to mend it (although that’s left out so it’s more like… he takes it off to gather his thoughts on what he’s going to do next, which is even more symbolic and useless in a practical way of why he does it). He then puts the coat back on to greet his army… And in a few episodes Metatron does the “draped yourself in the flag of Heaven” thing, which when 9x18 is all about the subtext and telling us to pay attention, I find a very very straight line to what that meant about him doing similar to 12x19 - using Heaven but not wanting Heaven, and never mind his motivation with Dean (and that being what changes his mind and makes him play Metatron’s game), the way it portrays Heaven as an obligation and a duty to help, but with a loneliness that comes from wearing that coat. He’s walking out into a parking lot full of angels but the lyrics are screaming that he’s without love, and lonely, and the end of the season confirms these choices were the reason. 

And in season 10 it gets more personal, and we have Hannah as a counter example. With Daniel in 10x01 who wants to stay on earth and gets what that’s all about we see Cas empathising, but at the end of the episode he goes way deeper than that, talking about human things that upset and startle Hannah. She literally drapes the flag of Heaven over him in 10x02 and smooths it down and accidentally reveals that the plaid of Winchesters is underneath the collar all along, and Cas is sleeping and acting more and more human while sick. She wants to give him his grace back to stop this and he resists… Out of penance and lack of self-worth and knowing he did a heinous thing to steal grace in the first place (again, for Dean, not just to be an angel again but because he needed to survive to warn him about Ezekiel). But symbolically she is trying to make him take the grace and be an angel. Be a leader, the angel the others will rally behind and follow. She represents how all of Heaven feels about him (and 12x19 and 12x15 cover similar ground in what Kelvin says about Cas). 

But also in 10x07 it goes deeper with how she feels about humanity - that the human things are forbidden, that love and enjoying sensual pleasures like showers are just *wrong* for angels to experience. She rejects human things entirely as stuff that’s not for her, and nopes out hard. And she is symbolic of angels in general, of Heaven’s desires and feelings in general when she asks him to be a leader. 

This is the sort of pressure - innocent of malice but FULL of lack of understanding - that is at odds with what Cas FEELS which is full empathy to wanting to be on earth… an actual understanding and feeling for these human things. He’s in his own body without a shared vessel as 10x09 goes on to confirm, which means he has none of the conflict Hannah does there, and 10x09 paints quite a picture of Cas as wildly unlike all the angels in this way, because it confirms for once and for all he’s alone in there and the Jimmy issue is resolved. 

To quickly skip ahead on this side of things, 12x10 shows the same thing but dialled up to a zillion. Instead of Hannah standing in for a clueless family that doesn’t understand and can’t empathise with the different feelings and sense of belonging Cas has, but is still mostly harmless if accidentally intolerant and stifling with their expectations and demands, we have Ishim, who stands in for the worst sort of family experience with intolerance. He’s also in love with a human and that’s the metaphor for violent, self-loathing homophobia I guess, as he kills Lily’s daughter to emotionally sever himself from her, to no avail, and tries to kill Cas for having the same “weakness”. Lashing out with hatred because of the internalised feelings of crossing a taboo line that their society has turned into a harsh rule. Supposedly good reasons are offered with the nephilim thing, but obviously Cas and Dean aren’t gonna have a baby any time soon, so the metaphor unfolds itself as queer through and through once Ishim turns on Dean.

And to walk aaaall the way back DOWN canon, I’m stalled in my rewatch in 4x10 at Anna pacing around talking about how she did the worst thing imaginable and cut out her grace and fell. 4x10 is the first episode to actually explore the nature of angels and lays down some ground rules, like that sex and disobedience are forbidden. 

ANNA
Orders are orders. I’m sure I have a death sentence on my head.

PAMELA
Why?

ANNA
I disobeyed… which, for us, is about the worst thing you can do. I fell.

DEAN
Meaning?

PAMELA
She fell to earth, became human.

(I have the transcript open and scrolled down to that part in a tab and have for months… CBA to go find her talking about sex later but I think we all know the stuff she says)

That “worst thing you can do” line feels to me like with retcons from 12x10, that the “sacred oath” may be any sort of angel to human dalliance or connection or desire to BE and to be FREE. The same thing Hannah nopes out of in 10x07 is what Anna had to tear out her grace to experience. Anna having to take her grace back to survive is tragic, especially as it puts her right in the vulnerable firing line of Naomi’s reprogramming. This metaphor is SO much worse with Anna than even Cas, as it’s so simple about her returning to her family as an angel again after making a break to be free and live as a human like she wants, then to be tortured back to the family line and pure obedience, to her eventual death as an unrecognisable killer, a la Cas in 8x17. But without the sympathetic inside view and long arc to explain it or the narrative having any interest in saving her >.> (Hi, I like Anna and am bitter about that whole thing 5eva :P) 

Cas in 9x09 also takes back a grace to survive (and this whole arc brings in the clear concept that has been on the backburner since Anna of grace and consciousness as 2 separate things, and grace to an angel being more of its power than its mind, though functionally they seem one and the same when nothing hinky is going on - something else important for human endgame as well as showing ways of removing grace without falling and turning into a human baby)… Again like Anna Cas has little choice when he takes the grace back. He was happy to die human until he learned Sam and Dean were in trouble, and made a horrific choice to help them by stealing grace. After that getting his real grace seemed like the only way to fix him dying of his actions, though he seemed happy to again, the story had other ideas :P (And Mittens wrote something on how Cas has “let himself die” in the way he didn’t in 10x18, where he has to pass through death for change and reaping the character benefits of transitions. (Flyingfish1′s heroine journey meta also comes to mind). Of course by not letting himself die, he’s trapped in the 10x18 > 12x19 holding pattern on his entire life and personal arcs except the ever-worsening depression and self-worth arcs that spring up in the meantime, and the belonging one.)

Anyway it’s all connected, these angels with their connections to humanity, either what they really really want and are denied by fate, or by fate end up experiencing, and really really don’t want. Or in Ishim’s case he really wanted and then because of being an example of a total tool representing institutional prejudices, decided murder was the best way out of his brush with feeling human things. And they all tell us things about Cas from different angles, with different angels (sorry. wordplay was right there.) The long and short of it is that Cas is supposed to be one of those marble statues with no doubts (in 4x10 - *buzzer noise* WRONG *points at 4x07 and “I have doubts”) or that human things are not for them (*points at Cas even bringing up the subject and confusing Hannah about why you’d want to learn them and horrified that Cas seemed to have picked up human cooties by admiring these qualities in the first place*) or indeed that angels in general are massively intolerant to humans and from start to finish it’s a death penalty offence to get tangled up with them or want to be/be one of them. (I know 12x10 is more applicable to the Destiel side of things but the general message about Heaven’s intolerance with “humanity” instead of queerness with all the other examples makes a lot of sense to me.)

Actually I’ve seen the argument a lot that this debate is metaphorical to the trans experience for Cas changing species, even more than the interspecies romance parallel to sexuality metaphors, and I think it is fairly simple to me that this is part of the general queer metaphor applied to Cas as something the angels are intolerant of. 12x10 threw in the Benjamin stuff too and made it a little angel gender studies thing (which Hannah also helped with in 10x17 by reprising her “totally in love with Cas” look in a male vessel and not giving a crap about the change). With Benjamin they said that the angel Cas was closest to there was the one who had a ….. friendship ….. with his vessel. So there’s a lot going on there between that and the “his vessel is a woman, benjamin is an angel” thing) :P 

I think, anyway, Anna wanting to be human and getting disowned on pain of death and having to become an angel again, and even then being hunted for daring to not be an angel once, is the closest parallel to what Cas faces. Especially for internalised ideas he had at the time and hadn’t got to unlearn until he was a human. 

And I think, additionally to that, he may not have even realised that being human even answered his feeling of not belonging or being different until AFTER it happened. Like, Metatron forced it on him too soon and then everything was non-stop awful and then suddenly he’s had to get grace again (and heading for that flag of heaven metaphor), and only then he gets to reflect on what it felt like, by way of being an angel again looking back on it. It was so brutal and short that he never got a chance to appreciate being human at the time in a way where it would explain to him what he lacks. 

By 10x18 he has the family dinner and he takes his coat off for it. Heaven has rejected him, he’s seemingly chosen the Winchesters again, and got his grace back, but he has to go back to the grind, and he doesn’t change his wardrobe, he keeps the coat which is basically performative angel-ness with Winchester plaid underneath. 

(Actually about the only time I can think of that angel-ness is used as the queer metaphor and not the other way around is in 9x06 when Cas is playing cis straight human to Nora and Dean shows up yelling about him being an angel at his workplace… I think that’s a very circumstantial metaphor which is more about delightfully queercoding the entire thing than a wider statement… After all, contained within a season where the main arc for Cas is leading a heaven army thing, and ending in “i just want to be an angel” in utter, tragic defeat on the emotional battlefield. Absolutely NOT a statement on what would make Cas feel HAPPY, just useful and numb, per 10x03 and what he says about human pain and how revealing those lines are side by side about what Cas is feeling and how angel is he REALLY, like, deep down in his too-big heart where it matters)

But yeah he just keeps on going after 10x18 and this all kinda drops away, so I think until season 12 basically nothing was really done to mess around with this concept again in a substantial, meaningful way aside from attack dog and similar arcs tangential to this and more about Cas’s state of mind in general (as the same conflict can be applied to Dean when human). It has become more about Cas belonging in the Winchesters as the main thing - 12x19 has Cas being way more upfront about using Kelvin to his face, that he’s only going along with it because his old connections to Heaven are useful, as well as shining a massive spotlight on Cas considering himself a guardian angel as a bad bad thing, which is actively damaging his beloved family relationships and especially upsetting Dean. He would rather protect them from afar, and I think long-term Cas ending up with the Winchesters but as an angel would always be somewhat prone to that sort of thought in an emergency that as a more powerful being he would have to protect them, and a sense of not belonging entirely as another species that can’t quiiite relate no matter how different he is and how much more kinship he feels with humanity even as an angel. I can’t see that as a happy ending, and since 12x19 it feels rather more like it would be not finishing a plotline that is not JUST about this relationship but using it to move the piece on the board about Cas’s human arc forward another step, as his endgame would be not just as human, but also with them, so tying the concepts together isn’t a bad idea, as long as it’s clear this is something in season 9 and 10 Cas came to as a desire without very much contact with them at all, and therefore very much for himself as an understanding of what he is and what he desires. 

And, again, I don’t think Cas has great resources for self-reflection on the subject - not just that Metatron had to turn him human briefly to even make him realise he could ever do it, but something like using the belonging with family arc to help speed it along gives him a clear reason and goal for why it works and would feel right for him and to give him the place to self-analyse with motivation. I really don’t like the idea of equating this entirely with Cas’s belonging with the Winchesters arc all on its own, though. It CAN’T just be about that he should be human to be with his human friends/family etc. But I do think that a lot of the work to explain why he identifies with humanity has ALREADY been done and is a solid, existing part of his character already. 

In a happy ending even if it all gets told tied up with the Winchesters, I would point to season 9 & 10 to argue that it was not JUST FOR them, but that they were the soft landing for him to make a decision. If he became human he wouldn’t be forcing himself to fit in with them, he would be doing it for himself. I mean, since season 4 he is equated with Anna, protesting loudly he’s nothing like her when even before we meet her he admits to one of the cardinal sins of doubt. He has ALWAYS had a slight leaning towards humanity and clearly described as UNANGELIC traits and feelings. So in this way he’s always FELT different and therefore as it gets expanded and expanded and ends up being a deeply complex metaphor and fascinating way to relate to Cas, it’s clear this is an inherent part of him from the start. The human feelings that Hannah violently nopes out of have been things Cas has tolerated, defined himself by, and felt all along. She’s used to show that Cas hasn’t ever been bothered in the same way, and just uses her leaving as an excuse to delve even deeper into human connections by worrying about Claire, and in the narrative, walking us right into proving he has his own body and no Jimmy, and another way Cas is both unique, and uniquely suited to a human endgame.

I think though that a lot of this is personal and subjective on the arguments going around, and I see this sooo deeply through the old meta I read back in season 9 & 10 which has shaped all my ongoing thoughts I do know I have developed probably my own biases on this. I think Cas would never be happy as an angel in a happy families endgame because the Guardian Angel Cas issue (which was his downfall in season 6, so not a new thing, just re-focused recently) would always play on his mind as it’s shown that he self-sabotages his relationships in order to protect them. I see it like season 4 Sam using his powers to exorcise because it’s an ethical way to get rid of demons quick in a fight without stabbing the innocent meatsuit. In season 5 even knowing aaall the trouble it caused him and that Ruby played off his desire to save people as a GOOD thing to do great evil, he was tempted by the demon blood and regrets/resents not being able to use powers to exorcise the kids. (Obviously before he learns they were all just human all along because that episode is so disturbing >.>)

Even if it went some pretty hinky places (as in the end of season 6 for Cas and the guardian angel mentality, with Crowley as his Ruby, as he uses “i still considered myself the Winchesters’ guardian” as a justification) Sam’s motives were for good originally and he missed the idea of sacrificing his own morality to save people for an objective better good. Cas seeing his powers as making him more powerful, therefore more expendable, less included, and with a personal sense of duty to watch over and protect them, HAVING the powers would only ever be living in temptation to do a 12x19 again. Sam only recovers properly without the powers to tempt him and I feel he’s in a very different place as a person by now… Cas with a human endgame might not get room to grow out of it on screen but by his grace being removed (hopefully and tbh by necessity willingly), he’d have the potential and promise that he would be able to recover in the same way from this toxic mentality. And I consider 12x19 very much doing for Cas and the guardian angel thing what Carver era and 8x01 especially did for the codependency. Just put it all on the table and told us, this is hurting them more than it’s doing good in the world. Let’s look at how it hurts them and why. Let’s aim to fix it and let them move past it.

And even if Cas can start to recover from some broad strokes, like feeling more included, feeling like less of a tool/personal attack dog, he will only have a long term chance at happiness if the temptation is removed at the source, and he will need to UNDERSTAND that too and to vocalise some things about his reasons for watching over them like this LONG before he chooses humanity. And these are very much my personal subjective feelings on why it feels BAD to me that Cas would stay an angel, as it’s right off on another end of the spectrum of why people are arguing they feel bad if he would become human. To me the personal identity stuff right down to complex sexuality and gender metaphors are MAIN TEXT in Cas’s arc due to him being an inherently queer character. The “it feel bad” reaction to me right now is that I feel sad for Cas being an angel around the Winchesters forever because he will always be their guardian angel and that’s BAD for what he WANTS which is just to be a part of the family with no complicated strings attached like his obligation to protect them. So to me I see humanity as the obvious answer to that. But that’s a personal reading of what I hope would happen and why. So my explanation of what I see in the text is one thing and this part is another, if that makes sense?

… I hope any of this makes sense. I apologise for typing so long… I know I said I’ve said it all before but I mean I assume you’re not tag-diving on my blog if you’re just asking me and tbh I wouldn’t know what tag to dive either and they’re *my* tags so I’m not judging ;)

hetalia fandom explores a lot of cool concepts but it’s so fucking problematic this fandom terrifies me sometimes and also with just hetalia itself there’s so many things that I just wish weren’t there

like ya know, the trivialization of that period of history and the atrocities and bloodshed that occurred and still has witness to bear testimony to it today to silliness and awful WWII-related “ohhh they invaded that country ha ha ha>:DD” jokes (because rape jokes are funny right)

also the nice thing where people for a while felt justified wearing fucking nazi uniforms as cosplay

and also the show’s literally called “Axis Powers Hetalia” so that’s nice, by nice I mean that’s awful why Himaruya

in general I feel a whole lot of ways towards Himaruya and they’re not all good but this isn’t supposed to be a long post so I’m not going into it 

also the show goes off of stereotypes and that sounds harmless since it’s supposed to be “lightly poking fun” at those stereotypes and all, but it. does a fair amount of harm. also some of the stereotypes brought up in the earlier strips and fanon are quite offensive.(ex: s.outh k.orea)

and also so much offensive insensitive shit has been said about these countries because people don’t seem to care about the fact that these characters aren’t just characters, they’re based off of real countries with actual people and cultures and hence even for a show that goes off stereotypes, there are boundaries but who cares, right, it’s just fiction so it’s totally not offensive to say that “all italians are cowards and useless” and that “all french people are rapists” or whatever!1!

and speaking of which, the gross throwing around of terms such as “rapist” and “pedo” and whatnot (stares at btt trio and the really bad parts of their fandoms) because holy shit do I even need to explain why that’s bad at this point

and that’s even acknowledging that some of the stuff I just rambled about was from earlier strips, ok, fair. but there are still lots of issues with it

hhhh fuck “I don’t want this to be long” my ass this wasn’t supposed to be a discourse post
it was supposed to be “I like hetalia but I … have a lot of problems with it”

anonymous asked:

this is tangential but thank you for answering a major question i had about s4 which was: why the hell did keith even need to be absent like that? both from the team and the screen? what you said made sense and i hope its followed up on

i think i needed a few days to really think about this and step back a little. because if you asked me on friday or even yesterday i’m being honest i really am not sure what i would’ve said it would’ve been a different answer LMFAO as there was just so much to process and think about (and currently i am so caught up right now in the Mindscape parallels for Keith & his scene in 4x06). 

i’m just trying to rationalise it and i think that makes the most sense. again, this isn’t meta this is just my personal ramblings with casual analysis i guess…. but yeah. i think we were meant to feel his absence, it was meant to feel this way. even the first time watching S4 live i remember saying to my friend that without keith there it was so…. it was just happening. some things happened, some things didn’t ect. not to be rude oh m ygod lmfao im not trying to sound rude about the team. i just …. oh man you know what it’s really hard to articulate this without being misunderstood which is why i haven’t tried to yet HAHAHA. 

i just mean that… the show has always been about the dynamics between the whole team and removing keith you could really feel that the team were working together smoothly (like i said that doesn’t mean better, they did lower their guard many times - a lot of things happened that if keith was there he absolutely would not have been on board with and he would’ve questioned and challenged it like he always has done with his team. there’s a lot i could say about this!! and would honestly love to! ). which is a direct contrast to the start of S3, where removing shiro the team were not completely in tandem (which makes sense - these are such sweeping statements to make without a proper Analysis PLS FORGIVE LOL). 

that’s why it hurt so much i think, because they weren’t shown to mention him or bring him up at all, he was suddenly absent in so many senses. a lot of this has been emotional whiplash though. i think that was on purpose. we were meant to suddenly see voltron without keith being there

also i feel like we have to mention that this is a parallel to shiro suddenly being absent S31-4. we’re meant to view S3+4 as one unit im pretty sure and @arahir brought this up like…. shiro is suddenly absent and taken from the team, the team dynamic shifts and we see what it’s like without shiro in the first part of this season. the second half, it’s keith and we see how the team dynamic shifts and we see what it’s like without keith. 

But there was a difference. Shiro’s absence was different and he was still discussed and mentioned throughout and that makes sense bc of the keith and shiro things that was building and because like i said in the ask prior to this one everything is situational and contextual. so even the parallels are different and have contrasts bc the situations are not the same. 

i think we should also remember it’s okay to feel stuff when we watch things, and not always positive emotions. that’s impossible and…. unrealistic. watching stuff doesn’t work like that. it’s okay to be frustrated or upset about something on the screen! like we are meant to react to what we watch! the fact you feel emotions from it says something, thinking about why actually tells us a lot about where this could potentially go and what is going on behind the scenes. 

for me, i’m certain that the team is in more of a vulnerable position than they realise right now. like hot DAMN!!! oh MAN. see my recent ask for a bit more on that but basically to paraphrase: keith’s direct imperative manner and also his ability to call up or question something he doesn’t agree with is important. keith’s absence has also taken with it a number of things he offered to the team that were mostly overlooked and tbh probably not fully appreciated off screen until they weren’t there. you don’t know what you got til it’s gone and you can’t see something until it’s not there kinda thing. 

i can’t say on screen bc tbh and this is a fair comment from what we’ve seen the team haven’t verbally indicated to each other or themselves on screen they miss him yet or what he contributed to the immediate team voltron. they haven’t seemed to pick up on the things keith offered to the team as himself.  

 and that brings up again as i’ve discussed in an analysis yesterday that every time he was told he was needed, it was a need that wasn’t emotional it was to fill a role and purpose as opposed to the individual. “Voltron needs you” / “they need you to be their leader” / “well yeah you’re the leader now right”  

even if there were personal undertones to the words spoken a ‘we need you’, it wasn’t explicitly said or ever discussed. and if that was the case then when he chose to leave it wasn’t addressed completely either. because whilst ‘we’re here for you’ was emotional and personal which is good, it wasn’t “we need you” - because from a mission point of view…… they didn’t

and it wouldn’t make sense to tell Keith they need him when he’s about to leave - that’s contradictory. there’s enough going on and contradictory things being said that is tugging keith in many directions emotionally. 

but the thing is keith has attached these “needs” the team have for him to strictly Voltron (being a paladin) Mission (despite the BOM mission being important and making headway on some big discoveries and being important to the general mission of stopping the Galra empire, voltron clearly has different priorities right now that keith just cannot grasp looking at the climate of their situation) and Leadership (which he believes he simply cannot fill and Shiro has re-established his bond with the Blion) ect. 

so in his eyes, yes. they don’t actually need him there because they can form voltron without him. then there’s also the fear of abandonment and rejection coming into play - but that’s really for another time bc there’s a lot to say about that haha. i cant really just tuck that into one sentence and feel satisfied we’re done LOL. 

but YEAH. wrap this ramble up: for someone like keith who really has these walls up and communication and understanding between him and team is rocky for many reasons … he really needs to hear a direct “we need you as keith our friend” and not as suggested subtext. even if we heard it or speculated it was there, doesn’t mean he did. 

and…… that’s another really cool thing to think about! so many tangents to unpick here, sorry! 

anonymous asked:

I'm hoping that the whole "Lance seeing Keith in a new light" thing with the dating sim setup shot will be a catalyst for him to go from being in denial about his feelings for Keith (ie. the whole "rivalry" thing) to suddenly realising that he likes him as more than a friend, and that that will be our lead into his sexuality arc, because that means we will get that in the first few episodes of season 4.

i could see it playing out like this or at least in a similar way, especially since s4 is basically just part two of s3… i love when people send in realistic ways this stuff could play out in the show. guess we’ll have to wait and see! either way, lance seeing keith in a new light like that is definitely the start of something.

anonymous asked:

I feel like Lucy is the one who shows the most romantic interest and Natsu really doesn't... I'm afriad that that means Natsu doesn't really love her back...

Don’t worry, because I think it’s the contrary!  Natsu isn’t an openly romantic person, therefore, he shows his affection/love for Lucy in other ways.  I made a whole post about all the best nalu moments in the current arc HERE, and I think that shows a lot of Natsu’s “romantic” side.  I don’t think that this hinders their relationship, after all, Lucy and Natsu ARE different people so they will show their affection towards each other in different ways.  And honestly this arc has shown the MOST romantic development between the two ever.

anonymous asked:

omgomgomgomgomg ok so how about "You know, just because I'm dead doesn't mean I don't have feelings." with vampire Brian xx

So much Brian omg yall are really trying to kill me!! My heart is overflowing w love rn.

“You know, just because I’m dead doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings,” Brian pouted as you laughed at him.

“Aren’t you technically undead?” you asked, laughing even harder.

“Aren’t you technically undead Brian? Why don’t you turn into a bat Brian, you’d be cuter that way!” he replied, doing a purposefully horrible imitation of your voice.

Although he was trying to keep up the act, he was starting to show the tiniest hints of a smile growing on his lips. You loved to tease him about the whole vampire thing, but he knew that you were always just kidding.

“In my defense, bats are really cute,” you stated matter-of-factly. “It’s not my fault you don’t have cool bat powers.”

“They’re not powers, they’re abilities! And I can do way cooler stuff than turning into a flying rat!”

Your interest was officially piqued. “Like what?”

Suddenly, he was behind you, tapping on your shoulder. “Well, speed for one.” You grinned and he did the same, flashing his fangs. “Plus these things are kinda cool.”

“What, you mean the death devices in your mouth? The ones thAT ALMOST BIT ME WHEN I TRIED TO FEED YOU ONCE?”

“I SAID I WAS SORRY!”

“SORRY DOESN’T KEEP MY FINGERS FROM GETTING BITTEN OFF, BRIAN.”

He scoffed, and you could see the laughter staring to build up inside him again. “That was only like one time… or maybe three, but honestly, who’s counting?”

You pouted and turned away from him, giving one last attempt to seem upset. But as you felt his arms wrap around your waist, you couldn’t help but smile and lean back into his chest.

“Are you using mind control or something right now? Because suddenly I’m thinking about how much I enjoy your stupid ass,” you sighed, closing your eyes and wrapping his arms tighter around yourself.

“Actually, I think that one’s just my natural charm,” he replied lazily, and you could feel the rumble of his words against his chest.

You hummed in agreement. “Your charms are to die for.”

He groaned loudly, burying his face in your neck. “Really? A pun? Are you serious, y/n?”

“It was a great joke.”

“You’re the joke.”

“Rude,” you shot back easily, pulling out of his arms. “Hey, let’s go home now, I’m getting kind of hungry.”

He nodded. “Just as long as you promise not to tell anymore stupid puns.”

“Deal! But you know, it really sucks that I can’t say any more.”

“Y/N I SWEAR-”