i mean i cannot even

all offence but right now i feel like … after all this content from today, it truly feels like i’m saying goodbye to even and watching him as he goes, with all this love surrounding him from all these people in his life, who will be in his life, on the good and bad days, old and new acquaintences, and watching him going forward onto success and taking his next big step in life.

it truly feels like a well rounded goodbye.

and i don’t know what to do or how to feel about that. pride and joy or melancholy and hollowness.

8

‘You know my powers, my dear Watson, and yet at the end of three months
I was forced to confess that I had at last met an antagonist who was my intellectual equal.’

Thoughts for today

Me: It’s finally happening. It’s EVEN! It’s here after what feels like eternity. Don’t get your hopes up though, there is probably just going to be a clip and a couple of text updates.

Skam: *gives us Isak’s contact name in Even’s phone (mannen i mitt liv), a clip exploring Even’s POV, a homemade video about Even’s love for Isak, a Hei Briskeby video showing Even and the balloon squad’s friendship and talking about Even’s past, a text between Mikael and Even (best bud!!), and a 21:21 update*

Me:

Originally posted by brunomarsalways

okay alright I’m having some aroace feelings and I need to get some shit off my chest because I’m having a hard time coming to grips with some things like

there is shit I want that I feel like I can never have just because of being aroace you know??? Like I don’t want to share a home with anyone I don’t really wanna share my life with anyone but I love being close with people?? I love laying my head on someone’s lap, giving really great cuddles, laying next to someone in a bed, just feeling that something warm next to me but it is completely and unquestionably non-sexual and non-romantic

also I hardcore prefer these activities to be with women? but I don’t know if that’s just a society based bias because we’re always told men ‘want’ something like?? ???? like can you be platonic gay?? is that a thing??

wait fuck that is a thing, queer platonic relationships FUCk I want one of THOSE

anyway, labels aside that isn’t what really bothers me, what really bothers me is the thought that I can’t have this, I feel like I can’t have it because other people won’t understand it like, ugh, if I had someone to cuddle with and be close to I would need them to understand that it is platonic only, and I’m afraid I could never find someone who would be comfortable with this kind of set up without 'getting anything’ from it

I mean I wouldn’t necessarily even need one person! and I already have a bunch of friends and even family that I’m super close with and are comfortable with cuddles and pecks on the cheek and they know it is platonic only and it’s perfect when I can hang out with them but, I’m afraid of when they all get into relationships of their own, will that make things different? will I make their partners uncomfortable?

one of them is already in a relationship but it’s with a friend who’s familiar with the dynamic of our weird group so he doesn’t care if I sit next to his girlfriend and lay my head on her shoulder and kiss her on the cheek, but I’m concerned about outsiders, people who aren’t familiar

and I see my friends so rarely anyway because of my job and just everyone’s lives and I just feel kinda lonely… but I don’t know how to talk about it with people who aren’t aroace because everyone always assumes loneliness is fixed with romance and I DON’T want the 'you’ll find someone for you!’ talk I cannot handle that shit goD

I mean even a pet would make me feel better but I can’t get one right now because of my living situation and even if I did I have like, this anxiety about germs and washing my hands after touching animals and fur gives me allergies so, even if I had a big dog that I could cuddle and have sleep next to me for comfort I wouldn’t be able to stop thinking about the germs and the hair all over my house and I’d feel like I’d have to wash the bedsheets every day

I just feel like, I can’t have what would make me happy… and I’m just really bummed out about that right now, maybe if I could find another aroace spec person who gets it? but I’d have to find someone who is not only ALREADY rare to find, but also in my area and gets along with me, I only know one other aroace person and we… don’t really talk any more so, she’s not even remotely an option

the society we live in is not built to make people of my sexuality comfortable, and that makes me feel… really shitty right now, I just want someone to hold me and be held by me and not expect anything more than that, why does that have to be so much to ask?

2

OMG @cantquitu LOOK WHAT FINALLY GOT HERE!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D

2

“Tell her,” Frederick urges with a slow nod.
Connor doesn’t balk, not once. He slowly but surely rotates to face me. Calmly, he says, “Five seconds. I tried leaving sooner, but I did see you half-dressed.” He pauses. “I didn’t see you giving head, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“That’s what I always thought, and I really, really appreciate it. What you did…”
“Don’t.” Connor’s deep blue eyes never dart away from mine. “Don’t appreciate me, Daisy. Because it wasn’t for you. I manipulated a man and used your evidence to further a ploy that benefited me and my family.”
He can paint the selfish portrait, but that picture is only half-complete.
“Maybe your intentions were never to help me, but you did. And it’s not the only thing you did.” It’s more than just interrupting Julian and me during Princesses of Philly. “How many photographs have you bought? The ones that photographers took of me backstage when I modeled?” I’m not sure if there’s more than just the one from Paris, but I remember that one like a deep, visceral scar in my body. Photographers captured pictures of me naked backstage at a Paris fashion show.
I never knew what happened to them.
They never leaked online. In time, I realized that Connor Cobalt is the only one who had the resources to buy them. To stop them.
To help me.
I believe he did it because he loves Rose, and Rose loves me. What power their love truly has.
Connor observes me for a second, his features harder to interpret. Then he turns to our therapist. “You see, I’m not as self-serving as you believe me to be.”
“As you believe yourself to be,” Frederick corrects.

anonymous asked:

Theres this one IHs that is anti nar///uto ending and every excuse this weeb makes contradicts everything about the canon side of IH. This person says that the novels in naruto is not canon while shoving the WDKALY in our faces. This person hates Hina/ta and callsnher an obsess stalker and slut shames her because she has big boobs. I want to know your opinion on this...(she has an anti blog dedicated on hating hina.ta)

First of all – that’s pathetic. People who are more anti over their NOTPs/faves than for their OTPS/faves bother tf out of me. GET A LIFE. I have said it before but I will say it again: KEEP NARUTO AWAY FROM BLEACH. Two different manga. Tbh, two very different endings. People always say ‘Waahhh I wanted to see Naruto be the Hokage, not Naruhina.” The Hokage does paperwork and dishes out orders. When they do fight, it usually means war. A war had just ended… When people say this, they either hate Hinata, are pro NS or both. 

The Naruto novels are a part of a series that is still thriving and in a spinoff era. Bleach is fucking dead as a doornail. This person doesn’t have to think the Naruto novels are canon, but they should apply that same thinking to WDKALY. The difference is Naruhina has a wealth of meaningful content – canon, filler, novels, etc. Ichihime does not so I understand the need to cling to WDKALY. I get it, but you can’t have your cake and eat it too. 

Hinata is a stalker, but Orihime isn’t? In what universe? 

This is admiration from afar that made a girl a better person… 

(Hinata found confidence in watching Naruto and she came out of her shell and he noticed her as more than this “weird”, nervous little thing).

That eventually led to this… 

This is straight up fucking stalking…

That immediately led to this…

Ichigo said he had a goddamn nightmare. Sip on that.

ANYWAY… Naruhina had development. Period. Their development began at the Chuunin exams when she faced Neji. That’s where they began. 

A fundamental difference between Hinata and Orihime in regards to these boys they love… Hinata’s love for Naruto comes from a genuine place. She values his integrity and his ability to keep getting up no matter how many times he’s knocked down. 

Orihime was infatuated with Ichigo because he wore a salty ass look. The funny thing is, at the beginning, though they’re both kids, Hinata is way younger than Orihime but she is more mature. 

Hinata resolves to be stronger from the beginning and genuinely gets better. Orihime starts awful, has her moment defending Tatsuki, and just gets worse until the bitter end of the final battle. There is no comparing the two to be honest. Hinata gets movies being the coveted Byakugan Princess and a flat-out love confession from Naruto and Orihime gets the status of a college drop-out and some weak clipart of Ichigo saying “can you make time for me?” after he watches the girl he fought heaven for get married. I mean… I wouldn’t even shame myself comparing them, anon. 

“You are afraid,” Qui-Gon stated plainly.

A look of shame came over Obi-Wan’s face, but he did not deny it.

“My heart is full of dread,” he admitted. “I wish we were on another

mission - any other mission. I am not sure I have the courage to face the

Holocron… ”

Qui-Gon leaned toward his apprentice. “You have every right to be

afraid,” he said quietly. “Allow yourself to feel the fear - really feel

it - and then let the emotion go. If it comes back, feel it again and let

it go again. There should be no shame in one’s emotions.”

“I am not at fault if it comes back?” Obi-Wan asked, looking up.

“No, Padawan,” Qui-Gon replied. “We cannot control how we feel.

Only how we choose to handle our feelings.”

— 

The Followers, Jude Watson 

(for all the haters lately who keep saying the Jedi were emotionally stunted or encouraged to deal with their feelings in an unhealthy way)