i mean how awesome would this be as an actual movie

Things the Hogwarts Houses say

(loosely based on conversations I’ve had/overheard)

Hufflepuff -

  • “If you don’t start singing along to High School Musical with me in under 30 seconds you will no longer be my best friend" 
  •  "I swear on my chicken nuggets-”
  • “Yes I made that joke up by my self - no it’s not from Spongebob Squarepants how dARE YOU-”
  • “Speaking of Spongebob can we just take a few moments to discuss how much of a masterpiece that first movie was please”
  • “Ah yes, it’s 3 in the morning, time to get emotional and tell all my friends how much I love them”
  • “You made me chocolate??? Oh my God I love you so much thank you I’ll have some right no - THIS HAS RAISINS IN IT YOU TRICKED ME
  • “Oh my God yeah I saw that movie, my favourite part was when - oh shit wait there’s this adorable kitten video I meant to show you last week and I completely forgot let me get it up on my phone”
  • “Sorry I’m late I was up all night watching those videos where kids get surprised with puppies”
  • “Are you awake? Great, let’s start planning our future homes together, I have a pinterest board ready”
  • “This is my favourite photo album! It’s full of photos of all the cats and dogs I’ve made friends with on my walks, I’ve even given them all names”
  • (crying) “Stop calling me emotional God damn it”

Ravenclaw -

  •  "Of course I remember you said you liked the colour red, you told me at like 1:35 am last year in May"
  • “What? Simplifying equations? No, I can’t help with that but I do know all the words to every Simpsons episode in the first 5 seasons if that helps"
  • “Sorry I really can’t go out today. No I’m fine, I’m just stressed I’m doing something important. I’m trying to memorise all the words to this documentary about frogs - What? Yes of course it’s important!”
  • “I discovered and fully analysed that meme 3 weeks ago, step up your game”
  • “What do you mean why do I have a folder full of strategic plans on how to succeed at animal crossing, that’s not weird?”
  • “Sir, I don’t mean to be rude but I’ve been doing my own research and you’re getting all of this wrong. Well yes I know I’m not the teacher here but - Yes, actually, I’d love to teach the class my self I’ve already made a lesson plan, thank you”
  • No, I won’t come and see Jurassic World with you. Because it’s completely unrealistic! Do you have any idea what dinosaurs are actually supposed to have sounded and looked like? Even adult velociraptors weren’t meant to be that b - OK you know what, I will come, but I’ll be pointing out every single problem to you. No, it’s too late, you already invited me. I’m buying our tickets right now, don’t move”
  • “You really think you can beat me at Mario Kart? I have spent YEARS studying this game and honing my skills, spending hours upon hours training until my hands cramp and even my tv is judging the amount of time I’ve spent playing and you think YOU can beat me? Let’s fucking go
  • “I think these guys think I want to murder them because I followed them home but it’s only because I overheard them talking about what would happen if Pokemon is real and I wanted to see how good their logic was”
  • “Shut up? Shut up? I haven’t shut up for 17 years and I’m not about to start now”
  • (crying) "I just want Shakespeare’s ghost to be proud of me”

Gryffindor - 

  • “I’d love to have a sleepover but it can only be when there’s a thunderstorm so we can dance in the rain, let me check the weather forecast”
  • “Did that bee just try and sting you? COME BACK HERE BEE YOU COWARD I’M GONNA FUCK YOU UP - wait shit no run”
  • "What did you say? Don’t touch it? Alright.” (touches it as soon as the person turns away) “Sucker”
  • “Whaaat? Someone wrote on the desk? No it wasn’t me I would never do th - My name was there? Well, I’m not the only one in the world with my na - My surname was there too? What are the chances?!”
  • “Help me I started saying lmao ironically and I can’t stop”
  • “Before you say anything it wasn’t me - unless it was something awesome then I definitely planned the whole thing”
  • Excuse me? They said what to you? … I have to go for a second, I just remembered something completely unrelated. No, no, I’m not taking this fork with me for any particular reason”
  • “Um, did you just tell me it’s impossible to sing along to a guitar solo? Stand back. Your mind is about to get blown”
  • “I am so not drunk! I’m completely drunk! … Wait shit I meant sober”
  • “I’M SO PROUD OF YOU AAAH LET ME HUG YOU! I’M NOT LETTING GO FOR THE NEXT 3 HOURS, GET COMFORTABLE BITCH”
  • “I bet I can stay up for longer than you - what no I’m not tired shut up - nO THAT WASN’T A YAWN I WAS JUST SHOWING YOU WHAT IT WOULD LOOK LIKE IF I WAS TIRED - SEE I DID IT AGAIN TOTALLY ON PURPO - ok fuck you I’m going to sleep”

Slytherin - 

  • “Oh my God, just tell me what you did already so I can start complaining”
  • “Sorry, I didn’t catch that. Did you say STOP saying fuck, or KEEP ON saying fuck?”
  • “Over your dead body? I was hoping you’d say that”
  • “If you even LOOK at them one more time I will take a stick as big as your ego and stick it right up your-”
  • “Don’t come near me or - OK fine, we can snuggle for exactly 15 minutes. I’m setting a timer now”
  • “Hey, I saw you posted a picture of us on instagram yesterday where my eyeliner isn’t completely straight? You’re gonna have to delete that, if anyone thinks my eyeliner isn’t drop dead perfect every day and that I’m not a literal make up goddess I’ll lose my reputation as the Regina George of the school”
  • “But keep the one where I’m wearing no make up so that all those bitches know I still kill it without trying”
  • “Oh come on, you know I’d never do anything to embarrass you! Speaking of which, that video I posted on youtube the other day of you falling down the flight of escalators in the shopping centre has reached over 1000 views”
  • “My dad told me tattoos were trashy so I got a giant tattoo saying ‘trashy’ on my back I’ll send you his reaction later”
  • “I’m not a sentimental person but if you touch my teddy bear I will turn you into a stuffed trophy to put next to him”
  • “What do you mean I look smug this is my normal face”
pjo musical: the rundown

so i went to see the lightning thief with @angelicomma yesterday and um. oKAY GUYS GALS AND NONBINARY PALS LEMME TELL U ABOUT THIS MOTHER!FUCKIN! SHOW!!!! because it was SO GOOD this is just like. the short list of what i loved about it because oh my god 

prepare for the longest post ever 

  • the set was such an aesthetic? it was all very metallic like there was scaffolding and greek columns with graffiti on them? it was very chb and very nyc and overall a Blessing 
  • every time they needed to show a different location they’d do it with the lights so like there were these lights lining the scaffolding that would change color ?? in the underworld they’d flash red, yellow and orange and were made to look like fire and near the ocean theyd be blue and if they were talking about trees itd be green and! if they wanted u to focus on a certain part of the scaffolding it’d be a different light color than any of the other parts which was rad af
  • the overhead lights were used really well too like when percy was singing about being the son of poseidon or when there was water the lights would be blue and when they were in the forest theyd be green
  • there is an entire song about how they hate new jersey and how they refuse to die in the garden state. know this
  • the show was very low budget like oh my god it was great
  • they didnt make some of their own props so sally walked in once with a trader joe’s bag and also the most important bag in the world (containing the master bolt) was a fucking jansport 
  • their representation of water was just to attach toilet paper rolls to leaf blowers and turn the overhead lights blue like what even
  • they covered the first 4 rows in toilet paper at one point 
  • also they fuckin deca-casted everyone except for percy (chris mccarrell, the light of my life actually he was so good) 
  • jonathan raviv played chiron, auntie em, random chb girl in a bike helmet and braids (?), random tractor guy (?), a bus driver, a train conductor, hades, and poseidon and im probably missing someone. he had very distinctive characters for all of them not to mention horse puns 
    • “the gods are kind of dicks”
    • medusa’s eyes were just light up swim goggles
  • sarah beth pfeifer, who probably has the best comic timing ive seen ever, played clarisse, katie gardner, a fucking squirrel?, mrs. dodds, lotus casino girl, random camper assistant to mr. d, and thalia 
    • *chases annabeth down a flight of stairs with a sword while screaming* 
    • “for their sixteenth birthdays my friends all got cars. I got a fern and a mason jar!” 
    • “ARROWS ARE MADE WITH WOOD. I REFUSE TO PARTICIPATE IN AN ACTIVITY THAT CONDONES VIOLENCE AGAINST OUR ARBOR BRETHREN!”
  • they had the most roles and they were GREAT 
  • george salazar was such a wonderful grover and mr d oh man 
    • mr d’s whole gag was he’d kick a chair when he got pissed which was hysterical bc the camper assistant would start pouting every time and he also wanted to turn percy into a dolphin 
    • “grover, are you ever going to wear pants again?” “NOPE!” 
    • his solo song was about thalia and how he couldnt save her talk about EMOTIONAL he cried
    • dam jokes
      • we might have more drachmas if you didnt spend them on those DAM SNACKS” “HEY! IT WAS THE HOOVER DAM” 
  • let me talk about. carrie compere for like multiple hot seconds bc GODDAMN GIRL CAN SANG 
  • she was such a good sally. can she be my mom. she sang a song abt percy being special and wonderful and i got a lil teary 
    • “you saved my life, percy. It’s time i learned how to live it.” cryin g 
  • her silena was really funny? like very whiny but very funny.
    •  “every time i bring a boy home, my mom’s there in her nightie […] she steals my mascara and all my dates!” 
  • she also played sort of charon? underworld guide in this awesome gold dress (she looked SO GOOD) who smacked grover’s goat ass (?????) 
    • “you know, bringing people to the underworld isn’t my only job. I also have a band. wanna hear a demo?” “not really?” “sorry, i can’t hear you over this SWEET ASS RIFF” 
    • We got everyone! we got kurt kobain, we got beethoven. any requests?” “um, do you have josh groban?” “we will.” 
  • JAMES! HAYDEN ! RODRIGUEZ! was sO GOOD AS LUKE
  • THERE WAS A GOOD KID REPRISE AND I WAS SHOOKEN 
    • “being a good kid gets you nowhere at all” bruh 
  • they couldn’t have a scorpion onstage so luke just. fucking stabs percy in the back??? 
  • He was also a really funny ares and gabe!! 
  • ok and my gal KRISTIN STOKES 
    • fun fact abt me and kristin stokes ….. so we were walking in the same direction after stage door and so me and @angelicomma just walked with her….to the train…. she gave us dessert recs…… and talked about the show (she’s so salty about how rangey her big solo is but trust me she was so good on that song) and also waitress with us…. it was the best experience of all time she is so nice and cool and was wearing jurassic park leggings how rad is she oh my god
    • her annabeth? was awesome? she was witty and tough and aggressive and i was ABOUT IT 
    • she called out sexism all the damn time 
      • “annabeth, i get it. do you know how many schools i’ve been kicked out of?” “yeah, percy, but when boys mess up they get a second chance.” 
      • “hey, annabeth, who’s your dad?” “he’s a history professor.” “i thought everyone’s dad was-” “a god? that’s my mom. sexist.” 
        • longest yeah boi ever 
    • the moment where she betrayed luke at the end??? YES GIRL
  • chris mccarrell was such a perfect percy i am elated 
    • “Tartarus? LIKE THE FISH SAUCE???!!!?!?!” 
    • *swings riptide like a lightsaber while making lightsaber noises* 
    • *packages medusa’s head* “To Mount Olympus. Signed, Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase.” “the gods will think we’re impertinent!” “*winning smile* we are impertinent.” 
    • *pouts* “i know how to hold a sword! like this!” annabeth corrects him and he swings it “oh wow actually that’s a lot easier” 
    • in good kid he was like? running around the stage and climbing the scaffolding and shit? and i cried??? the no mom line was the WORST i wanted to actually scream and his voice is so pretty 
    • and he was so shook by his own powers oh man 
    • he was just. so good at the twelve year old thing it was fantastic he was all fidgety and Dramatic ™ god bless
    • he loves sally so much!!! all the demigods were salty af abt their parents and he was just quietly singing like “my mom loves hugs and scary movies” and i just. screamed quietly
  • there were rlly cute percabeth moments too. 
    •  percy’s knocked tf out the first time annabeth meets him (she infiltrates his dream a lil) and he sings a lil song abt how she’s beautiful and stuff and he wakes up and she’s all “YOU DROOL IN YOUR SLEEP” shook 
    • she shows up at capture the flag (percy hasnt officially met her yet) and he points at her and was just “gasps YOURE MY DREAM GIRL!” and annabeth side-eyes him hardcore and he goes “UM. THE GIRL. FROM MY DREAM.” 
    • “the god is my mom. sexist.” “NO NO I LOVE GIRLS!” annabeth is shook yet again and percy panics and is like “I MEAN UM THEYRE VERY NICE” 
      • percy gets serious side eye from luke
      • it’s great  
    • when percy gets stabbed they almost kiss and then grover RUNS ONSTAGE “HEY! here’s your ambrosia percy” goddamn it was DRAMATIC
  • im definitely missing shit but oh boy it was so so good
  • i’d kill a man for that soundtrack  
  • if you have the chance (and the money) it’s just. such an Experience and everything i could have ever dreamed of. the cast is great (and theyre all so freakin NICE s/o to kristin especially). 
  • i’d highly recommend it!!! A+ 1000/10
Positivity about the signs

My gemini sun is taking over and so I’m feeling filled with positive things to say!!

Aries: These individuals are so fiery and fun to be around. They’re the friends that’ll volunteer you to do something you would have never done otherwise but have fun doing anyway. They give off these lovely energetic vibes and are some of the most outgoing people you’ll ever meet. Even if they are shy, they still show their amazing lively personalities in one way or another.

Taurus: These people are so down-to-earth and are actually secretly so caring and sweet it’s fantastic. Their the person you want to go out to a movie with and yes they actually will share their popcorn, stop with the stereotyping guys. Their also so level headed they’re just the right people to talk to when you need advice.

Gemini: These guys are so much fun to be around omg they’re always so humorous and playful it’s just great. They’re the best people to hang out with when you need a good distraction from life. They give off such optimistic vibes it’s just great. Even if they’re a shy Gemini you can just tell by their laugh that they are full of fun. And they always have the best topics to chat about! They’re great at keeping awkward silence away. 

Cancer: These people are so sweet and pure omg I love them. I swear they’re even cute when they’re pissed. Sure they can be a bit emotional but that just means you’ll never have to worry about them hiding something from you. They’re some of the most kind people I have ever meet and honestly I really hope my next girlfriend is a Cancer!

Leo: You are so kind and generous and yes you are a bit prideful but that isn’t necessarily a bad thing! It’s lovely to have people around who like themselves, it brings positive vibes. I always find that there is something magnetic about a Leo’s personality which makes everyone just love them which I am super jealous of, you guys are so lucky!

Virgo: Ahhh you guys are so kind and organized I LOVE YOU. I love that while you can be super kind and caring you also can be real and serious and just get to the damn point it’s awesome of you. You’re also such hard workers and I can really appreciate that! 

Libra: I love how kind you guys are and omg may I just say that you are all so pretty! You make such fun, nice, and funny friends. You may not be my favorite sign but I can still find plenty of things I love about you guys. Like you give off such great vibes <333

Scorpio: You guys are so hot and yet so cool and that is awesome. I love your sarcastic sense of humor and your powerful presence. Sure you intimidate me a bit but hey I still think you guys are wicked cool. You’re always like that badass friend that people are always just aspire to be!

Sagittarius: YOU ARE SO MUCH FUN TO BE AROUND OMG. I love adventuring you you guys you are so exciting and yet so chill and omfg I just love how accepting you are of everything. Idk why but I just love your good vibes and your explorative attitude and how you take initiative.

Capricorn: I absolutely love the energy you put towards your work. I mean I absolutely aspire to be like you in that aspect! Sure you can be a bit serious at times but I’ve seen that you can still be really nice! You’re also just so much more level headed than the rest of us plebeian non-Capricorns that like honestly I bow down to you.

Aquarius: Ahh I love how unique you guys are! You groove to your own beat and that is just fantastic, I really wish I could be more like that! You’re also so smart like that is so great. I also always have so much fun when i with you guys like I really appreciate your presence.

Pisces: Oh my you sweet little thing I know you’re really sensitive but you’re so kind and empathetic it’s just so lovable. You’re so caring and your smiles are always just the most heartwarming things. Ah I may not get along with some of you due to your sensitivity but I still really love this sign and your cheerful, calm, caring vibe.

Flirt

Request: okay so I saw how your requests are open and yay! and could I request a Bucky x reader? like something about how he loves flirting with her and getting her flustered because she’s kinda shy, and she thinks it’s nothing but he really likes her? sorry if it’s too specific.- anon

Bucky Barnes X shy!Reader

Word Count: 1312

Warnings: None? 

A/N: Hi! I hope this is okay. I’m a terrible flirt, so I did my best with this!! I hope that you like it, and that it’s nice a fluffy after my last one-shot. Feedback would be awesome! :) xo 

Keep reading

Dating Peter Parker Would Include.....

Homecoming spoilers. Pin for later when you’ve watched the film. :) I repeat, spoilers. SPOILERS.

  • Being his best friend, aside from Ned, of course.
  • Living just across the hall. It was actually how you two met back in the day when he used to visit Aunt May and Uncle Ben.
  • Struggling and mourning the loss of Uncle Ben, because let’s face it, you adored those two with all your heart. (They used to babysit you whenever your parents needed a last minute babysitter)
  • Rubbing the fact that Aunt May loves you more (even though she loves you two the same) in Peter’s face.
  • Enduring all of Aunt May’s larb jokes whenever you join them for Thai.
  • “I larb you, Peter. And I larb you too, [Y/N]
  • “Okay, Aunt May…..enough.” 
  • “What? You don’t larb me? Am I too lame to be larbed? Too cool to larb your awesome aunt? Not enough larb to go around to your good ole aunt? Saved all your larb for you one true larb, [Y/N]? Huh? Hm?”  
  • “Uh….we larb you too?” 
  • “Thank you, [Y/N]. At least someone larbs me.” 
  • Being completely supportive of Peter getting an internship with Tony Stark. 
  • Offering to help him with his internship.
  • Getting slightly offended that he doesn’t want help.
  • “Am I not smart enough to help you?” 
  • “What? God, no. It’s not that…..it’s um….I just have to do this on my own, that’s all. You know, no help. Strictly myself….” 
  • Competing against him with academic scores. 
  • Being extremely competitive with each other when it came to exams.
  • Going back and forth on having the highest grade.
  • Talking about going to the most prestige college and then changing your minds because you two could never leave Aunt May. 
  • Putting up with Ned being needy. 
  • “Ned….this is a date….between two people.” 
  • “Oh cool, I love pizza. I’ll just sit down right here and take a slice.” 
  • “Ned….” 
  • “Yeah, so anyway, you two should come over and help me build my lego deathstar. It’s legit.” 
  • Bickering with Ned, constantly. (But, loving him just as much as Peter)
  • Getting along great with Michelle. 
  • Roasting Peter and Ned into oblivion with her. 
  • Like full on roasts. It’s fantastic how long you and Michelle can go. 
  • I mean, it’s almost not fair how hard you go. 
  • But, in the end, Peter loves you and is sort of relieved that you get along with the people in his life. 
  • Movie marathons.
  • Cuddles for days.
  • Like the kind of cuddles that make you all warm and fuzzy inside.
  • You know, the ones where you just sigh happily in his arms and think that Disney World ain’t got shit on being the happiest place on earth. 
  • Netflixin’ and chillin’, (if you know what I mean, wink-wink) Forgive me, I forget that’s he’s fifteen. No sir, keep that in your pants now, you little rascal. And you? Don’t be puttin’ out, miss. 
  • Geeking out over Star-Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, etc.
  • Going to Comic-Cons and dressing up.
  • Building and experimenting to the point where Aunt May and your parents scold you two for almost blowing up the complex.
  • Although, it’s not like you actually could blow up a building to that magnitude. 
  • And after the fire department threatened to arrest you two, you put an end to experimenting. 
  • Peter making you a playlist on your ipod. 
  • Listening to it all the time because you just love the songs he chose. 
  • No seriously, this playlist makes your heart stop with every song.
  • Peter always getting you your favorite muffin for breakfast before school.
  • He’ll even leave it at your front door in a cute little handwritten paper bag if he’s sick for the day.
  • Always being told he loves you.
  • Because, you’re the best thing that ever happened to him. 
  • You being embarrassed when he tells random strangers that he loves you. 
  • Like, you’ll be walking down the street and he’ll look at the old lady walking her yorkie, “Excuse me, m’am. But, I just want you to know how much I love this girl right here.” 
  • Peter.” 
  • Then flagging down a taxi to tell the driver too. “Hey, yeah no, I don’t need a ride. Just wanna tell you that I love my girlfriend.” 
  • Peter even telling Happy who always responds with, “Can’t wait for the day she leaves you.” 
  • Him keeping his double-agent life a secret.
  • Because he doesn’t want you to get hurt. 
  • Constantly wondering why Peter’s free time is slowly diminishing. Because you can’t quite believe the internship was that demanding.
  • Worrying that Peter was going to break up with you. 
  • Peter finding out about your worries through Michelle. (Who threatened to skin him alive should he ever hurt you.)
  • Taking a night off from his “internship” to take you out.
  • “Peter….we’ve been on the train forever.”
  • “Have a little bit of patience, [Y/N].” 
  • “Where are we going? Does Aunt May know you’re out right now? How much longer? Is this going to be forever? Are we running away from our problems? Running from being millennials and trying to fit in with society? I didn’t pack anything. How are we going to survive the outside world?” 
  • Peter intentionally ignoring your million questions by putting his headphone in one ear and other in yours. 
  • Playing your favorite song to keep you quiet.
  • Realizing he’s taking you to Central Park. 
  • Almost on the verge of tears when you find out that he organized a candlelit picnic under the stars. 
  • Seeing Ned in the distance as he walks away and knowing that he had a hand in it.
  • Smiling and feeling secure that Peter is here to stay.
  • Getting a weird feeling that he’s still hiding something.
  • Unsure of how to go about asking him what he’s hiding because you don’t want to cross a line.
  • Michelle not caring and confronting him before coming back to you and confirming that he is hiding something because of the way he acted.
  • Feeling uneasy but forcing yourself to believe that Peter would tell you everything and anything because you two were on the same level and understanding about your relationship.
  • Using the Washington D.C. trip to curve your mind from it.
  • It failing when Peter decides to re-join the decathlon team. 
  • Forcing yourself to ignore the gut feeling that Peter is hiding something when you asked him why he decided to re-join.
  • Peter being completely oblivious to your uneasiness.
  • Pushing it to the back of your brain when Liz scolds you for not having your head in the game.
  • But it coming back when Peter doesn’t show up for the decathlon. 
  • Corning Ned and demanding where Peter is and why he isn’t answer his phone. 
  • Getting irritated when Ned stumbles over his words. 
  • Becoming so upset that you tell Ned to tell Peter that he better have an explanation or else they would be over. 
  • Visiting the monument with everyone with the exception of Peter (obviously) and Michelle who passed on the tour. 
  • Ignoring Ned when he tries to talk to you.
  • Liz concerned that you were upset and asks if you want to talk about it.
  • About to confide in her when the elevator of the Monument starts to malfunction.
  • Peter freaking the hell out when Michelle screams, “My friends are up there!”
  • Panicking and pleading Karen to help him find a way to save you and everyone else.
  • Trying to stay calm even though your heart is about to flip out of your chest.
  •  Getting mad all over again because you were going to die pissed off at your boyfriend. 
  • Spider Man saving you just in the nick of time. 
  • Being so traumatized over the ordeal and Peter not being there, you lash out on him when he finally decides to make an appearance. 
  • Michelle shaking her head, “You messed up, dude.” 
  • “[Y/N], wait! Please, I can explain.” 
  • “Explain? Explain?! I’m going to need a whole encyclopedia of an explanation, Peter. Can you give me that?
  • Ned trying to diffuse the situation. 
  • Getting even more pissed off and breaking up with Peter.
  • Michelle whistling (because she didn’t see it coming), “Man, that’s rough. You gonna be okay? Actually? I don’t care. Bye.” Running after you to make sure you were going to be okay. 
  • Ignoring all of Peter’s texts and phone calls.
  • Having your parents stop Peter from coming into the apartment even though they felt you were being silly. (They adored Peter)
  • Sitting in your room with a pint of your favorite ice cream while watching stupid rom-com films. 
  • Crying when the guy gets the girl.
  • But telling yourself, you’re better than that and that you don’t need Peter.
  • Crying again because you need Peter. 
  • Hearing a knock on your bedroom door and getting mad because you just know your parents let him in. 
  • Yanking open the door to find a worried Aunt May.
  • “May? What’s wrong?” 
  • Her coming into your room, “I know you and Peter are fighting right now but have you heard from him?”
  • “No, I haven’t. I actually haven’t received any texts or calls from him today….” 
  • “Where is he? He’s been gone all day. I’m freaking out, [Y/N]. I’ve called every precinct and coroners office.” 
  • Being speechless because it is very unlike Peter to not check with Aunt May. 
  • Her on the verge of tears, “I can’t loose him too.” 
  • Grabbing your jacket and your phone, hugging Aunt May tight and telling her you’re going to find him. 
  • Spending hours before finding him sulking in hello kitty pajama pants and an awful touristy tshirt. 
  • Awkward tension as you text Aunt May and telling her you found him and that he was on his way up.
  • Knowing that there was something wrong but not wanting to engage because you were still mad at him
  • Eventually breaking because you still love him.
  • “I lost the internship with Tony Stark……” 
  • “I’m so sorry, Peter. I know how much that meant to you.” 
  • “Yeah…..” 
  • Letting him go. 
  • Regretting not hugging him or comforting him. 
  • Going back to your apartment to sulk and eat another pint of ice cream. 
  • Turning on the television to torture yourself with more rom-com’s. 
  • Witnessing Spider Man and Iron-Man save a bunch of people on a ferry.
  • Dropping your spoon and ice cream as it hits you. 
  • Running into your room to grab your journal. (you wrote daily)
  • Comparing the dates and times of when Spider Man was spotted and whenever Peter claimed he had the “internship”.
  • Finding a consistent pattern. 
  • It dawning on you that Peter Parker is Spider Man. 
  • “Holy shit.” 
  • “That little shit!” 
  • Running out of your apartment and across the hall.
  • Banging on the door. 
  • Aunt May answering with a concerned look.
  • Ignoring her and pushing past her to go straight into Peter’s room.
  • Busting in and then closing the door behind you. 
  • Marching straight up to his startled, adorable, puffy eyed self. 
  • Punching him in the arm and then covering his mouth when he lets out a yelp.
  • “You’re Spiderman?! Spiderman? Seriously? That’s what the internship with Tony Stark was about? What the hell, dude.” 
  • Peter being completely in shock that you found out. 
  • Standing there in complete silence for almost half and hour. 
  • Him finally explaining how it happened. 
  • Understanding why he didn’t want to tell you but still a little salty about it. 
  • “So…..are we okay now?” 
  • “……..” 
  • “[Y/N]?” 
  • “……..”
  • Baby.” 
  • “Fine. We’re okay but don’t you ever keep secrets from me ever again.” 
  • Everything going back to normal. 
  • Him showing you all his nifty tricks.
  • Feeling bad that he got his suit taken away. 
  • Trying to make him feel better by telling him he doesn’t need the suit. 
  • Ned being ecstatic that you know. 
  • Because now he can finally talk about it with someone other than Peter. 
  • Ned not shutting up about it. 
  • Peter showing you a different view of the city.
  • Planning romantic dinners on roof tops. 
  • Or well, kind of romantic.
  • It’s mainly subs and sodas.
  • But it’s the thought that counts, alright.
  • Making you promise that you will run away whenever something bad happens. 
  • Vowing that he will never let anyone hurt you for as long as he lives because aside from Aunt May, you are the most important person in his life and he does what he does to protect you. 

Fuck. I didn’t think I’d get this many people requesting to be tagged. This literally took me forever…..


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His || Jungkook || 0.12

Member: Jungkook x Reader

Type: Angst, Fluff, Smut.

Teaser | 0.1 | 0.2 | 0.3 | 0.4 | 0.5 | 0.6 | 0.7 | 0.8 | 0.9 | 0.10 | 0.11 | 0.12

Keep reading

I Thought We Already Weren’t (Peter Parker x Reader)

Request: anonymous asked:
Ooh I love angst!! Can you do something where the reader has a huge crush on peter but he likes Liz and he asks her out on date and he asks the reader for help with everything so she basically plans the whole thing for him and he keeps saying things like “wow ur such a good friend” and out of jealousy she asks Flash on a date and they start to go out and Peter says he’s not good enough for her and they get into a huge argument and deicde it’s better if they stop being friends…

Word Count: 2,413 (sorry, got carried away again)

Warnings: Angst

A/N: heyyy more angst! sorry this is quite late, but I finally figured out how I wanted this imagine to go. I did try to shorten it a bit since it is quite long, but I guess this is as short as it’s gonna get 😂 hope you like it, anon! ❤️❤️

Part 2   Part 3




“(Y/N)!” your name carried through the halls above the chatter of the student body. Eyebrows furrowed, you jerked your head out from your locker to see who was beckoning. You spotted Peter’s dark curls bobbing amongst the crowd towards you.

“(Y/N),” Peter gasped. He leant against the locker next to yours, breathing heavily.

You raised your brows in amusement. “Yes?” you asked, curious as to what would motivate Peter to run.

Peter swallowed, “I need your help.”

“With what?” you turned back to your locker to shove your math textbook inside and grab your jacket.

“Ummm… well… it’s about…” he lowered his voice to a barely audible whisper and leaned closer. “It’s about Liz.”

You tilted your head away from him slightly to hide the anguish that quickly flashed on your face. “What about Liz?” you tried to keep your voice steady and calm. A difficult feat, as you felt a pit drag your stomach and your breath catch high in your throat.

“I—I uh—well—I have a date with her,” he stammered

“What?!” you exclaimed, shocked. “Wow, Peter!” You tried to shove out any tone of sadness in your voice. You knew how much courage it must’ve taken this nervous but excited and eager romantic buzzing next to you.

“Yeah,” he breathed.

“Did you just ask her?” you guessed.

“Yeah. Yeah I did,” his ecstatic state quickly turned into a more panicked one. “But I need your help. I have no idea what to do!”

“For the date?”

“Yeah!” Shutting your locker, you swung your jacket over your shoulder and headed for the school doors. Peter bounded after you. “Please, (Y/N)!” he pleaded.

You shoved the doors open, “Why aren’t you asking Liz, though? Isn’t the date with her?” You worried that that might’ve been a bit forward in revealing your subtle bitterness.

“Well, yeah but I—I wanted to surprise her. And I can’t ask Ned ‘cause I don’t wanna mess this up, I mean no offense to him, but you know—(Y/N), you’re my only other friend who can help me!” Your stomach twisted at that word. Friend.

“When is it?”

“Friday.”

You sighed, conflicted yet sympathetic. Here he was, the best friend you had slowly but undoubtedly fallen for, asking for your help with someone else. Of course you were jealous. Of course you were dejected and feeling a bit betrayed. But of course you were going to help him. Because, dammit, you were proud and happy for him, too.

After two years of daydreaming, confiding, and awkwardly trying, he had finally gotten courage and motivation to do something about it. You saw how he lit up when she merely looked his way, how he melted whenever she said something nice to him, how jittery and nervous he got whenever he was within a ten food radius of her. You weren’t about to take that away from him just because of your unrequited feelings; because before he was ever your crush, he was your best friend.

“Okay,” you replied. Hope and relief immediately washed out all desperation on Peter’s face. You couldn’t help but smile a bittersweet smile.  

“Really?!” he grinned.

“Yeah, yeah, of course!” you cheerfully affirmed. “Just, uh, come over later tonight so we can think of some ideas.”

“Thank you! Really, (Y/N), thank you so much!” Peter squeezed you in a tight hug that you half heartedly returned. He suddenly pulled away and reached for his phone. You already knew what it most likely meant, so you started past him.

“I’ll see you around seven?” you called back. Peter was already running the opposite direction.

“Uh yeah! Seven’s good!”


Groaning, you got up from your chair and stretched your arms above your head. How could simple chemistry equations somehow make your entire body ache?

You were about to plop back into your chair when a tapping came from your window. Glancing at the clock that read ten minutes past eight, you trudged over, unlocked it, and slid it up.

“Sorry I’m late; some nut job decided tonight was a good night to rob a jewelry shop.”

“Hm,” you nodded as you headed to your desk. Peter stumbled through the window, leaving it open for a quick getaway.

“Your folks home?”

“Nah,” you shrugged. “Both have meetings.”

Peter slipped his backpack off and slumped onto your bed. “So,” he rested his elbows on his knees, “Any ideas?”

You swiveled your chair around. “Not really,” you confessed. “Nothing’s really come to mind.”

Peter hung his head down, groaning, “What am I gonna do?”

“So… okay then. What do you want to do?” you inquired.

“I dunno! I was thinking maybe just dinner and a movie? Chill, not to much fancy expensive stuff…”

“No, no don’t do that. That’s typical, not surprising at all.”

“Ugh,” he muttered. “Has she ever said anything about like what her ideal date would be?”

“Don’t think so…” you racked your brain. You didn’t know Liz too well. Sure you’d shared some classes with her these past two years and had gotten to know her well enough. But you weren’t the best friend she’d confide to about relationships and dating. You also weren’t going to give up your ideal date for Peter to create for someone else.

You both sat in silence, thinking. There was a slight tension in the room that you both could sense, but it was hardly enough to make the setting awkward. You’d also never let it get to that point either.

“I know she likes picnics…” you offered. “Maybe you could get takeout from her favorite place and take her on a picnic somewhere?”

“Oh yeah…” Peter sat up. “That sounds cool!”

“And it’s not super expensive.”

“But do it kind of late-ish,” you added. “And maybe on the roof of a high building. So it’ll be darker and better for star gazing. Liz loves stars.”

“Yeah… yeah, yeah! That’s great; that’s awesome! Oh, okay okay! I got it,” Peter leapt up from your bed and raced over to embrace you once again. “Thank you, so much, (Y/N)! Thanks for being such a great friend and—and helping me and WOOH!” he whooped as he skipped to grab his bag. “I’m gonna go scope out some places…”

As he squeezed through the window you chuckled, “Okay…” That nagging feeling began to creep up on you, and you put your head in your hands. You knew the petty thoughts would begin to fill your mind soon.

You knew you shouldn’t feel jealous. You knew there was nothing you could do to change his mind. But you couldn’t stop it. You were mad at yourself for believing you could ever compete with a girl like Liz Allen. You hated having these feelings of envy and betrayal, because you knew they were futile. It was pointless; this was only going to make you feel even worse.

Okay, you told yourself. Calm down, stop thinking like that. Just be happy that he finally got his chance with Liz. Repeating this over and over didn’t help. Okay… Maybe the date will go bad— NO! No, God, why even think like that?! Okay, maybe the date will be okay but Peter will figure out he doesn’t really like her? Ugh why am I LIKE this?! You felt completely horrible when you realized you actually found solace in that last thought. Deciding you needed to just distract yourself before you could torment yourself any further, you turned back to your notebook with a sigh.


Four weeks and five dates later, wherever you saw Peter, there was Liz. Your one solace, your one hope had fallen through. Peter had begun to hang with you and Ned less and less as the weeks went by. His spontaneous midnight visits had stopped altogether, and sometimes wouldn’t even answer your texts for a good few days.

Distractions were helping less and less as well. No matter how many songs you blasted in your ear, or how many fanfics you poured over each night, or late night calls with Ned about any movie you two could find; the envy kept gnawing away at you. But poor sweet Ned. You finally broke and confided to him; keeping it in was just too much. And try as he might to help you try to get over it and keep you distracted and happy, you both knew nothing was enough.

It also didn’t help that Liz would often come to Peter when he was at his locker. Right next to yours. Even though they tried to keep their voices down to small murmurs, you could hear every sickening and sappy word pouring from their mouths.

“God, I think I love you.”

You froze, gripping the textbook as if it were your composure. That phrase had managed to slip through all the ambient noise and ruckus echoing through the hallway and reach your ears. How many times had you wished to hear those words from him, only for them to be meant for someone else?

Well you certainly didn’t hear much after that. You didn’t hear Liz’s reply, or Ned’s greeting, or your locker slam. The only thing that your ears registered was your booming heartbeat. You felt your whole body heat up, searing with anger and jealousy. You wandered away from your locker, away from them. Meandering through the crowd of students, you couldn’t think of where to go or what to do.

An obnoxious voice broke through the pulsing in your ear.

“Hurry up, move it, (Y/N)!” Flash complained as he breezed past you. “What’re you waiting for? Your imaginary boyfriend to become real?” he jeered.

A sudden drive and confidence took over you, fueled by the anger and jealousy coursing through your veins. You knew what you wanted. You wanted to make Peter hurt. Hurt like you were. And you knew just how to do it.

“Well that’s up to you, Flash!” you called. Flash whipped around, confused. It morphed into amused as you jogged over to him.

“What do you mean?” he crossed his arms.

“Pick me up, my place, Friday at seven,” you challenged. Flash’s face dropped into bewilderment. “Wear something nice,” you added, brushing past. “I expect to be wowed.” As you pushed open the school doors, smirking, you could perfectly hear the shock that rippled through the silence of the hallway. This was certainly one way to get over it.


*tap tap tap*

You startled up from your chair, not sure if you had really heard it. You went over to your window and opened the blinds revealing the red and blue figure. Sliding it open, you leaned out on your elbows, blocking him from coming in but opening yourself to conversation.

“Hey,” Peter breathed.

“Hey.”

He shuffled anxiously, tugging at the mask in his hands, “Can I talk to you?”

You shrugged, “I’m listening.”

“Why—” Peter took a deep breath. “Why’d you ask out Flash?” he timidly asked.

You stiffened. “Because.” Guilt started to take the place of resentment in your gut, but you shoved it away. You could tell he was concerned about you doing something so out of character and ridiculous on all accounts. However you refused to sway from your choice. You weren’t going to to back to sitting around moping about how he was with Liz.

“Because why?” he demanded.

“Because I can and I did.”

“But when were you interested in Flash?”

“When was it your business?”

“Since you’re my friend!”

You scoffed, hurt. “Am I?”

Peter squinted at you, “Y-Yeah. Wh—Why do you have to ask?”

“‘Cause it doesn’t feel like I’ve been!” you cried. The rest of your anger was spilling out, but with a different tone this time. This wasn’t a revenge thing or a spur of the moment vent-all-your-feelings session. This was everything that was buried deep, everything that wasn’t revealed to Ned, everything that really hurt.

“You’ve constantly ditched on stuff ‘cause you’d rather go to something else with Liz! You’ve left me and Ned hanging countless times. If it was because of Spiderman stuff, then I’d be more understanding, but it isn’t. You’ve just replaced your true friends with the girl you’ve been oogling for years!” your voice rose several octaves. “You never reply when we text, and you never answer when I need you or even when Ned does! So no, Peter, it doesn’t feel like I’m your friend anymore.”

Neither of you moved, too stunned by the words floating in the thick tension between you.

“So this is a jealousy thing.”

“What?!” you screeched. “That literally has nothing to do with what I just said—”

“No! No no no, it does!” Peter retorted. “You’re jealous because I’m spending more time with her, I get it—”

“No. You don’t.”

“No, I do! Look, I’m sorry if I’m not spending every waking moment with you guys like I used to, but it doesn’t mean we’re not friends anymore.”

“NO!” you cried. “No, Peter! It’s not because we’re not hanging out as much, it’s because we’re not hanging out at all. You’re always so distant with us now and you ignore us and—”

“I don’t ignore you guys!”

“Uh, yeah you do—”

“If I did, then I wouldn’t know that you asked Flash out, and I wouldn’t be here asking why the hell you’d ever do that!”

“Again, what the hell does it matter to you?!”

“He’s a douche!” Peter flailed his arms. “He’s an arrogant, spoiled asshole who’s so insecure that he goes around teasing people. He even teases you, (Y/N)! And you asked him out?!” He howled. Peter took a step towards your window, and you withdrew a little. “He doesn’t deserve you, (Y/N), and you don’t deserve to put up with that piece of shit—”

“You know what?” you glared at Peter, seething, blood boiling for the second time that day. “Yeah, you’re right: he’s a piece of shit who only cares about himself. But I bet he’s still gonna be a better shitty friend than you’ve been this entire month.”

Peter took a step back, appalled at what he was hearing. He pursed his lips and dropped his eyes to the ground. “Maybe we just shouldn’t be friends anymore,” he whispered.

You reached up for your window and numbly slid it shut. Knowing he could still hear you, you muttered as you closed your blinds, “I thought we already weren’t.”

Midnight Talks Pt. Two || Peter Parker Imagine

Originally posted by optimus-grimes

(not my gif)

Word Count: 938 Words

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

A/N: I tried my best (that’s a lie, i didn’t even grammar check it), I hope you all enjoy

Part One

“So Y/N, how was your, um, your night last night?” Peter asked as he started eating his lunch. All day, all you could think about was last night. Spider-Man randomly showed up in your room. In what world does that actually happen to someone? You looked down at your lunch, trying to figure out what to tell him, Ned and Michelle who suddenly got interested in the conversation due to lack of an answer.

“It was uh, good actually, watched a funny movie. Why do you ask?” You question back at him. You didn’t tell him about the whole Spider-Man thing because you didn’t know if the man in the mask wanted you to tell people. Peter looked down at his lunch tray. “Just curious, that’s all. What about you guys,” he looked between Ned and Michelle, “how were your nights?” He asked. Peter didn’t want to seem suspicious if he only asked you. He knew what you actually did last night, you were with him. Well, his alter ego. Did you not trust him enough to tell him about it?

As Ned began to explain his action packed night of binge watching old movies, you began to play with your food, lost in thought about the city’s hero, Spider-Man. He was funny, and kind of cool. Not everyone gets to talk to him which made the entire situation even better than it already was.  

Peter looked over and saw you playing with your food. He turned to see if Ned was still talking to him but he was now talking to Michelle. “Hey,” Peter said as he turned to you, “you okay? You seem a bit out of it.” He sounded worried about you. You nodded your head yes, “Yeah, yeah I’m fine. I just didn’t get much sleep last night.”

“Did you stay up all night watching movies?” He asked with a small smile, knowing exactly what you did. “How’d you know?” You said sarcastically, knowing that you told him earlier. “Lucky guess.” He said with a shrug, playing along with the whole thing. The two of you quietly laughed at the situation.  

What the two of you didn’t hear was Michelle and Ned talking about you. “You think  they’re ever going to date?” Ned whispered to Michelle. “Oh definitely.” She said before getting back to reading her book.

It was late at night, again. But this time, you were busy doing your homework. You only had a few more problems you needed to do. You sighed, getting anxious for the sleep you so desperately needed. You went to open your window, wanting to hear the sounds of the city. You went back to your homework area and glanced at the time on your phone to see that it was 11:50. Jesus, these high school teachers are draining the life out of you. Forgetting about your homework, you stayed on your phone for a few minutes. All of a sudden, a wind washed over you. You look up and see Spider-Man.

He came here on purpose this time, he wanted to see you. At least that’s what you understood. “How is is it that Spider-Man has been in my room, not just once, but twice now?” You asked with a humorous sound lacing your voice. You saw him shrug his shoulders as he went to sit on your bed. “I guess I just like talking to you.” He said as he jumped up onto your bed, and crossing his legs Indian style. Spider-Man patted a seat next to him, indicating you to go and sit with him.

You got on the bed and crossed your legs the way that he had done. “What do you want to talk about?” You asked as you started playing with your hands out of nervousness.  

“I don’t know….tell me about your life. Your crush your favorite things, your friends, really anything.” Spider-Man said. You cleared your throat before speaking again. “My friends are the most awesome people on the planet. They are always nice and understanding.  I would be lost without them, really.” You said looking up at him.

“Are you popular?” He asked curiously. You shook your head immediately. “No, I hang out with the same three people everyday. If anything, I am one of the most unpopular kids at my school.”

“How could you be unpopular?” He asked with a surprised tone, “You’re  the most gorgeous girl I have ever seen.” You blushed at the statement. Another plus, he is super sweet. “T-Thanks.”

“So, do you have a crush on anyone?” He questioned with a voice that made him sound like a dramatic 5th grader. This made you smile. “He, he is just something else you know what I mean? He’s different then any other guy that I have ever met. He is just such a good person with a big heart and he is crazy smart. He uh, just got an internship at Stark Industries. What teenager gets that opportunity?” You told Spider-Man all this, venting to a man you don’t even know.

“Sounds like he’s a pretty cool guy. What’s his name? Maybe I can help you with your relationship.” He said the last part mockingly. Peter knew exactly what he was doing. He wanted you to admit your feelings for him even if you weren’t telling the real Peter. He just wanted to hear you say those words.

You smiled widely thinking of the boy who had you wrapped around his finger. “His name is-”


“Peter! What’s up?” You said as you ran to catch up with him. He turned and smiled at you, “Hey Y/N.”

Part Three

Dreams - Dylan O’Brien

Author- @maddie110201

Pairing- Dylan x Reader

Words- 4,944 (not sure how this happened ;) )

Warnings- alot of fluff and smut

AN: Ok so this is my first fic and i’m super nervous to post this. I just wanna thank @ninja-stiles for helping keep me motivated and helping edit.


Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines

Best friends are supposed to be with you no matter what, they’re supposed to be there for you through everything, always be happy for you and support you.

Dylan was exactly that. We have been friends since we were little, neither of us can actually remember a time when we didn’t know each other, but our moms tell us we’ve been friends since the womb. Dylan has been there for me through everything crappy that life has decided to throw my way, and I have done the same for him. But not once did I ever think that being happy for him would kill me inside.

Keep reading

Spider-Man: Homecoming

Okay, so like I’m still bitter about Andrew but Spider-Man: Homecoming was actually really good.
————————–

• A film by Peter Parker - seriously that home movie was the cutest shit and it worked so well as a means to introduce Peter and his relationship with Happy. Like, he’s such a bouncy kid, so excited for his “Stark Internship.”

• Once again, excellent soundtrack. Marvel is really targeting their audiophiles this year and, like, I’m so here for it. Here, take ALL my money.

• Peter’s actually a motor-mouth (though not as much of a sarcastic little shit as I would have liked). Not to get too off topic here, but one of the reasons I love Spiderman and Deadpool, Spiderman & Deadpool teamups, and why I think Spiderman and Deadpool work so well together is because they’re both smart, sarcastic little shits who run their mouths off. I could go on and on about how much I love the Spiderman/Deapool dynamic and why it just *works.* But I’m focusing on Spider-Man: Homecoming here so I won’t. I guess my point is that it was really nice to hear Peter chatter away in Homecoming and to really see how smart this kid is. I mean, he and Ned HACKED A STARK SUIT. Successfully! Like, come on.

• Diversity - like real diversity. For the first time in a long time, the extras in a Marvel movie, in *any* movie, actually reflected real life (i.e., it wasn’t a sea of white people with one (1) poc). I really hope we keep seeing more movies that do this.

• Ned. Ned. NED. A true friend, the ride-or-die friend, a v precious v smart cinnamon roll who’s just really excited to be a part of this chapter in his best friend’s life, and who is a part of this chapter in Peter’s life - not a sidekick, Ned’s got a role and it’s one Peter legit values. Ned: the real MVP 👏👏👏👏

• Zendaya is a gift, A GIFT I TELL YOU. A+ casting I’m in love. She had the best comedic timing I think Just, the whole movie she’d occasionally drop a line or make a gesture and it killed me. She hardly spoke yet she stole the fuckin show, beautiful. Get it Zendaya, can’t wait to see more of you in future movies, Marvel and otherwise.

• I’m actually really happy with how they wrote Liz. Like, they totally could have made her a bitch, the stereotypical pretty popular girl who doesn’t even know Peter’s name. But they made her really down to Earth and grounded. She not only knows Peter’s name, she’s legit smart, and actually pays attention and notices that Peter’s acting strange and cares about what’s wrong! Like, well done Marvel. Nice job.

• Speaking of good characterization: Flash. Finally! A bully that looks and behaves like a bully. Not a muscled up, dumb, meat head who everyone in the audience can see coming a mile away, but just…. a normal, mean dude. You know, like the bullies in real life. 

• Okay, so I know the fandom keeps joking about how Aunt May keeps getting younger and soon she, too, will be a child. But I gotta say, Aunt May was awesome in this. She’s so cute, and I want her wardrobe, and omggggg the montage where she’s helping Peter get ready for the dance ❤❤ I like this Aunt May, good job.

• “If you’re nothing without the suit, you shouldn’t have it.” Hello Avengers callback wow. If you still think Tony Stark isn’t a hero unless he’s Iron Man, if you still think superpowers or a supersuit are what makes a hero after this you can unfollow me right tf now.

• ParentalFigure!Tony Stark. I am LIVING! 

• K.A.R.E.N. is lovely and I adore her. I love that Tony programmed a nurturing and encouraging personality into her. This whole movie dropped subtle hints at how hard Tony is working to be Not Howard™ for Peter and I love itttt.

• Happy!! We haven’t seen much, if any, of Happy since IM 3 and I’m so “happy” 😉 he’s back (plsdon'thurtme). And he’s sooo the cranky Uncle who cares deep down in his pinky toe. It’s wonderful. And! And!!!! He, an adult, openly and honestly admits he was wrong and apologizes to Peter, a teenager, who was right. Like, when’s the last time that happened in a film?

• “It’s been in my pocket since 2008” are you fucking kidding me Marvel??? Since Iron Man fricken ONE (1)??? Tony you’re WHIPPED and I love it.

• That Scene where Peter is trapped under the concrete holy shit. That was The Moment™ I was finally sold on Tom Holland and this new Spiderman, w-o-w. Acting. Wow. First Spiderman movie where we, the audience, are forced to acknowledge that Spiderman is a 15 year old CHILD. He’s still learning how to do this whole superhero thing, and in this moment he’s fucken terrified. 

He could have been at the dance, having a grand old time with his friends, you know, being a “normal” 15 year old. But no. He decided to go stop a bad guy, even without his suit, because it was the right thing to do and now he’s being crushed and he’s scared but goddamn if he doesn’t pick himself up and go because he’s Peter. Fucking. Parker. He still fights the villain, even after discovering who the villain is, AND fricken saves said villain because guess what?? He may be a 15 year old child but let’s not forget that he’s also a 15 year old fuckin HERO. I remain steadfast in my opinion that the only true difference between Spiderman and Deadpool is that Spidey actively tries NOT to kill people while DP doesn’t really care all that much and that’s why they get along so god damn well, they just complement each other man idek

• Poor Steve. Poor, poor Steve. Patience, is it really worth it? (Yes. Yes, it is Steve)
——————
9.5/10 - yet another Peter Parker Spiderman film but, like, this was actually done really well?? So, yeah.

Anyways, if you’re hesitating to go see Spider-Man: Homecoming in theaters…. I get it. I do. I, too, was all: “Not another Peter Parker movie, ugh.” And yeah, go see Baby Driver or Wonder Woman (a smaller movie featuring characters with disabilities and a female-led diverse superhero movie respectively) first if you haven’t seen them already. Lord knows Spidey’ll be fine if you don’t see it in theaters right away. That being said, you should definitely go see Homecoming in theaters. It’s worth the money.


Serious Squareness: an exclusive interview with Lorenzo Semple, Jr. on the creation of TV’s Batman

Holy unexpected delights! I opened my Tumblr inbox the other day to find a message from @jondambacher, and, well, let me just turn it over to him:

Screenwriter Lorenzo Semple, Jr. celebrates a birthday today (March 23rd). The following is an excerpt from a number of long interviews I was blessed, honored & ecstatic to conduct in 2008, for Lorenzo’s biography I was writing.

To the King of Serious Squareness, I celebrate you, I thank you, I wish you a Happy Happy Birthday.

Jon Dambacher: I have a quote from Dozier referring to you as “the most bizarre thinker I knew.”

Lorenzo Semple: Good.

JD: Have you ever read that?

LS: I think I have, now that you mention it.

JD: What do you think he means here?

LS: I don’t know what he means. He obviously meant it as a compliment but it’s… I don’t know what he meant. I just could think of off-the-wall things. When he showed me, as I’ve told you, when I was living in Spain writing plays with a family, he sent me a cable to come up and meet him at The Ritz in Madrid there in the garden of The Ritz, he had a very strange face, as he pulled out of his pocket a “Batman” comic book. Said, “Would you believe it, this is what ABC has given us to do, because they’d owed us one, can you believe it? He was… Was so disdainful of it. I, uh, in all honesty, I took one look at it and thought of it and said, "I know exactly what to do.” I’ll go home and I’ll write it.“ That was the only discussion about "Batman.” The only discussion. As I say I wrote it, Bill loved it, he gave it to ABC, they thought it was excellent, but they were dumbfounded by it because there was nothing like it. All those things like, “Pop!” and “Bam!” were all written into the script.

JD: That’s awesome! Did you guys just share some crazy sense of humor together–is that how you were able to create this amazing…

LS: Yeah! It’s not really that crazy once you get the note of it, you know what I mean?

JD: Okay.

LS: It’s all out of that same… That dead serious nonsense, you know what I mean? Adam was actually perfect for it and Burt in his way, too. You know, they’d be chasing somebody and Robin would say, “Park here, they just went into that building…”

JD: And there’s “No Parking” signs…

LS: “No Parking” sign, right! That kind of thing. All these come out of the same level of dead serious, squareness, if you want to call it that. Dead seriously square. That was… Which isn’t that bizarre compared to modern movies, you know, like Charlie Kaufman and things.

JD: Right.

LS: It wasn’t too bizarre. Bill probably thought it was bizarre but we’ve both recognized he was a sophisticated guy. He recognized it as being funny. He didn’t mind me thinking up all these things like Bat-Shark-Repellent or whatever it was when the shark had him by the leg…

JD: Right, the Shark-Repellent-Bat Spray.

LS: I guess you could call that bizarre thinking. To me it’s all a part of one type of thinking; do you know what I mean? Bizarre isn’t quite the word, I’d say imaginative.

JD: Okay. We were talking about favorite lines from that film specifically, one that’s stuck with me over the years–I’ve always wanted to meet the man who wrote the line, “Ah, a thought strikes me–so dreadful I scarcely dare give it utterance!”

(Lorenzo breaks out laughing.)

LS: That’s very funny, I agree! I agree! That’s the kind of thing we’ve been–you know, that pompous squareness actually. Very good hearted. Adam was a very sweet guy. A very nice guy himself and Batman, you know, nobody was killed in it and there’s nothing–except the name–in common with the Batman franchise, the Warner Brothers ones. The people who say, “What do you feel about those movies” always expect me to say something, I say, “Actually I don’t like violent movies particularly and I stay away from them.” The Batman I wrote has nothing to do with these movies–really has nothing to do with each other… My Batman is more in the spirit of the comic and the very fact that millionaire Bruce Wayne, that’s all you have to say… The fact that you refer to him as Millionaire Bruce Wayne, I mean…

JD: The Millionaire Philanthropist.

LS: The Millionaire–thank you! The Millionaire Philanthropist. I had forgotten that. Just the fact that you’d refer to anybody like that–if you’re sophisticated it shows immediately–it’s ironic at best.

JD: That squareness.

LS: You’re right. That’s what I mean. The squareness, exactly.

so, my buddy littledivinity and i have been talking beauty & the beast a lot, because ‘tis the season, and we somehow stumbled upon the idea of the story being told about a middle aged belle and the beast instead of youngins, and how that would make the story even more resonant.

and then just now i randomly thought, “what if nicole kidman and ewan mcgregor starred in such a film?”, because my soul needs nicole kidman and ewan mcgregor to fall in love again on a movie screen like it needs few other things in this life. plus, you know, musical, bright colors, awesomeness, hurrah!

and then i thought, ‘but wait, actually, what i really want in this life, even more than brightly colored musicals, is more lowkey and lovely fairytale movies like exquisite and incomparable 1998 masterpiece ever after

and just picture it!

nicole kidman is the longtime spinster school teacher who lives in a quaint vaguely magical 19th century-esque country village, but she’s a badass teacher who exposes her students to different philosophies of thought and probably takes them outside for nature studies and calisthenics. (so, basically, miss stacy from anne of green gables.) the school board hates her, probably, and is very suspicious of what kind of IDEAS she’s filling the local kids’ heads with (why does she keep saying it’s okay for girls not to want to be wives and mothers, or that it’s all right for boys to cry???? is it possible that she is A WITCH???), but her parents were very well regarded in the town when they were still alive and so that bought her some respect for awhile. but there’s a new fancy schmancy family with school aged kids in town, and they’re extremely disapproving of miss nicole, and trying to find a way to oust her as schoolteacher and replace her with a man who is probably very similar in temperament to mr. collins from pride & prejudice. a man who will put patriarchal gender roles back into childhood education!

meanwhile, ewan mcgregor is a grumpy old hermit duke or something who once had great wealth and privilege but has fallen into disrepair. maybe someone cursed (magically? complicated vengeance-ly, a la the count of monte cristo? who knows) his family long ago due to their shady rich people business dealings, and his father killed himself to escape the scandal and his mother died of heartbreak and his fiancee who he thought loved him steadfastly dumped him to marry another, and now ewan’s the last surviving member of his once-great family and he just lives alone this grand old manor house that has gone totally to seed. he isn’t an actual beast, because it seems like in this day and age that’s going to require levels of CGI that my quaint b&tb retelling movie just don’t need, but let’s say that he’s quite unshaven and dirty and generally off-putting and he sometimes ventures out into the forest that separates his estate from the village, but is never seen actually frequenting the village. there are abundant rumors that the forest and manor house are haunted by a beast/ghost/warlock/vampire (how does he SURVIVE if he doesn’t come to the weekly market for food???), and everyone knows you don’t go there. also, people like to gossip a ton about his family and the scandal even though it was decades ago and they all dead. because people suck.

so one night, some of nicole’s rowdy teen pupils maybe steal some wine from one of their parents’ liquor cabinets and venture into the woods and dare each other to go past the gate of his manor house, and he catches them at it and gets HELLA PISSED @ THESE UPPITY HOOLIGANS INVADING HIS PROPERTY. kids today!!!!!!!!! he probably locks them in the stables so he can deliver them a 5 hour lecture on why they suck, and also why all of humanity sucks. which isn’t the worst fate ever, but, like, he kind of looks like a straight up crazy ax murderer (crazy hair! crazy beard! tattered clothes! definitely hasn’t bathed this month!!!), so there’s some serious panic in the hearts of these kids.

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marino-kun  asked:

Do you take prompt? What about Stiles having a secret crush on Derek but when saw him, taking care Scott's son, he fell in love.

I’m not much of a kid fic person, so this took me a while, but I tried. Hopefully it’s kind of what you were angling for!

*

“Do you think I’m ready for fatherhood?” Stiles asks, trying to keep the panic out of his voice. He’s not freaking out about this. He’s not.

Boyd says flatly, “Stilinski, you’re twenty-one years old. You’re supposed to know how to use a condom by now.“

Stiles’ hand spasms and he accidentally squirts a huge glob of ketchup on his mound of curly fries. Fuck. He has the ideal ketchup-to-curly-fry ratio down to a science, and this is not it. “No, absolutely not what I meant. It’s just. Did you know Derek had a kid?”

Boyd meditatively takes a bite of his burger. “No. But the nice thing about Derek is that he doesn’t go in for personal talk.”

Stiles shoots him a weird look. Of course Boyd would think that was nice. Stiles, though, has been trying to break down Derek’s walls even just a little bit for months now—sitting with him in class, sharing his notes, studying with him in the library and getting late-night waffles together afterwards, little by little pulling Derek out of his shell. He’d thought he was getting somewhere, but obviously not, not if Derek failed to mention this kid even existed.

Which he does. Stiles knows, because he can see him right now, over by Prof. Martin’s pool. Apparently his name is Jamie.

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Not over you.

I was binge-watching The Voice and came across Fernando Daniel’s audition where he did a very awesome job with his rendition of Adele’s When We Were Young (which is one of my favourite songs!) and this is the aftermath of watching that movie. Truth be told, this imagine is supposed to be fluffy and fun but somehow, after that video, it turned out like this. This was not proof-read by the way so there might be a lot of mistakes but anyways, hope you enjoy!

MASTERLIST


Originally posted by dayaholics

There is just so much rejection one person can take.

Some might call you a fool for still continuing to pine over someone who clearly has a very obvious crush on another person. Some might even call you stupid or stubborn for still finding opportunities to confess to him even though you have been rejected countless of times. Some might even pity you and your choices but like you always tell your friends, you do not really choose who you fall in love with.

It just sorts of happen, in a blink of an eye. Love hits you during the times you least expect it and although you might not know what ‘love’ really is – this feeling you carry for him feels a whole lot like it. More often than not, your friends try to set you up with other guys just so you could “move on” but after every one of those dates, it just cements the fact that love is not something you can just easily turn off – like a switch. If it is only that easy, you probably would have switched off your feelings for him because being rejected hurts. Unrequited love is just honestly the worst kind of love that has ever existed.

“How many times does this make?” MJ asks when she spies you looking down-trodden and your unusual cheery self. You look up from the ground and give her a smile, attempting to cover the hurt. When MJ gives you a deadpan expression, you know you are not fooling yourself let alone anyone.

At this point, you like to think that Peter Parker has ruined you for everyone else. Those dates your friends set you up in always leave you feeling dissatisfied and at the end of each and every date you have gone to; you always end up comparing all of them to Peter. So much so, you ultimately stopped going on those dates because clearly trying to force yourself to move on is just very hard.

“Probably the fifth – I might have lost count after the third time.” You tell her weakly, chuckling at your luck. Sometimes you do not even know if you are a masochist (who else would be alright with putting themselves through this kind of pain?) or if you are just stubborn (or dumb, either one works well at this point). “What are you doing here anyways?” You ask her, wanting to move on from the topic.

MJ shrugs her shoulders before turning back to her sketch book. “Saw Parker looking constipated after he left, figured it might have something to do with you.” She glances at you and you bite your lower lip as you try to school your expression and still keep the smile on your face. “I was right.”

You would not really consider MJ as your friend just yet – the two of you have never talked prior to your first confession to Peter Parker a few months ago – but she is steadily becoming one. Unlike your other friends, she does not sugarcoat her words and she says them as it is – your friends tend to skirt around the subject when talking to you. You really appreciate her character.

“Yeah.” You murmur before turning to look at your textbook. Despite being able to read all of the words on the pages, you simply cannot comprehend any of them at all. You blink a couple of times and sigh when you still cannot comprehend anything that you have just read so you close your textbook instead. “I think I am done here.”

MJ looks up from her sketchbook before she glances at the clock, a frown creeping on her face. She watches you pack your textbook in to your bag but before you could stand up and leave the table, MJ speaks up. “He does, you know.”

You freeze momentarily before turning to face MJ. “Excuse me?”

MJ sighs before she leans away from the table, picking up her sketchbook. She flips through several pages before landing on the page she was looking for. “Peter.” She shows you this caricature of Peter seemingly pining after you and you honestly did not mean to laugh – because the thought that Peter actually reciprocates your feelings after rejecting you is just really hilarious to you – but you did.

You sit back down in your seat, wiping away the tears that manages to escape your eyes. A few heads turn to look at you but you dismiss them in favour of looking at MJ. “Perhaps in a different universe that might actually be the case, MJ.” You point out. “Even if it is true, how do you know any of these?” You don’t really hang outside of the library as well as your student body office as much as you would have love to so you don’t really know what happens outside.

MJ shrugs her shoulders. “I just observe people a lot – Peter is interesting to observe because he makes this face a lot when it comes to you.” She points to the sketch again and you try to process her words. No matter how much you try, you still could not wrap your head around it so you just shake your head.

“Thank you for trying to cheer me up, MJ.” You tell her and made a move to stand up. “See you around.” MJ nods her head at you. You give her one more smile before walking out of the library, leaving MJ sitting at the table alone with an unfinished sketch.

(“Why would you do that, Peter?” MJ asks as she sits across of Peter and Ned. The two of them exchanged confused looks before turning back to look at MJ. She rolls her eyes. “Why did you reject Y/N again?”

Peter flinches at the sound of your name and he looks away from MJ. Hearing your name fall from MJ’s mouth reminds him of what had transpired earlier that morning – you had confessed your feelings to him (for the fifth time) and he had rejected you. The look of utter hurt and disappointment on your face that you tried your hardest to mask after he had rejected you stayed in his mind.

Truthfully, Peter does not quite understand why he keeps rejecting you. He knows he has some sort of feelings for you – perhaps not ‘love’, Peter doesn’t think he knows what ‘love’ is yet but he knows he likes you more than normal. What is not to like about you? Vice President of the school, steady grades, nice personality – there are a lot of wonderful qualities about you that Peter likes but he just cannot bring himself to accept your confession. Call him scared, Peter would not even mind because he is. Terrified beyond his wits.

Ned looks aghast. “You rejected Y/N again? Dude, that makes it like the fifth?” He stares at Peter in disbelief and Peter groans before slowly nodding his head. Ned groans. “Why would you do that, Peter?” Ned repeats MJ’s question. MJ crosses her arms and leans in, waiting for Peter’s answer.

Peter swallows the lump in his throat and looks at his two friends. “I – I don’t know.” He shakes his head as if to emphasize how he really does not know.

MJ furrows her eyebrows.

Ned is still looking at Peter in disbelief.

“You need to try harder than ‘I don’t know’, Peter. If you don’t like Y/N, maybe you can just tell her upfront and be honest about it. So that she can move on with her life instead of pining after you.”)

A week after you had last confessed to Peter, you decided to do something drastic because after that confession of yours was rejected, you went to a really bad place inside. Despite the cheery disposition you kept whenever you are in school and around friends, back at home, nothing much could distract you from the fact that your first ever crush on someone is really painful and hurts you a lot.

So right when the school ended, you immediately approach Peter just as he is about to leave with Ned in tow. “Peter, I need to talk to you for a moment – you don’t mind, do you?” You address Ned who simply shakes his head. He steps aside, leaving the two of you alone and Peter looks somewhat uncomfortable as he stares at everything and everyone but you.

This hurts you more than you would like to admit but this is the reason why you are here. “I just… I am not going to confess so you don’t have to look so uncomfortable.” You can’t help the spite that left your mouth really but at this point, you really don’t care anymore. Enough is enough.

“Y- you’re not?” Peter’s surprised voice catches you by surprise and you aren’t sure if you are sad or happy so you disregard it completely. “I – I am not! Uncomfortable, I mean.” Peter rubs the back of his neck sheepishly before looking at you. “Y/N, I – I actually…” He trails off when you shake your head.

You need to do this now or you are going to chicken out and continue to hurt yourself. “Every single time I look at you, Peter, I can… I can feel my heart sink because I know you won’t ever like me like I do about you and,” You swallow the lump in your throat as you try your hardest not to tear up. “And even though at first I told myself this is alright – I just, I don’t think I can, at least, not anymore.” You shake your head. Your hands are trembling and you look away from Peter. “Which is why I have decided,” with a heavy heart, you add in your mind, “that I am going to stop liking you, Peter. You won’t see me again after this and thank you so much for entertaining me whenever I confess to you.” You would really love to hate Peter, honestly, you would but Peter has always treated you nicely despite the uncomfortable position you tend to put him through whenever you confess.

Peter is at a loss of words as he stares at you. He wants to say something – to tell you that you are wrong but it’s as if his lips are locked and he suddenly can’t find his voice or find it in him to move his hands to stop you from leaving. All Peter could do is watch you leave and that’s when he realizes that his heart is hurting a lot.

Ned approaches him with a worried look. “What did Y/N say? She ran past me just now.” He mutters – no matter how many times Peter has rejected you, you normally take the time to talk to Ned too because you genuinely find him to be a very funny, albeit nerdy guy.

“I think,” Peter actually has to stop himself from talking for a bit because tears are starting to well up in his eyes so Peter has to blink a couple of times. “I think I just got my heart broken.” He informs Ned numbly and all Ned could do is just stare at Peter in surprise. “And it hurts.”

Chihokogate is overwhelmingly romantic; fight me

I’ve seen people describe the “Overcome Chihoko” story in a number of ways–Victor being Extra, crackfic, something written purely for laughs, and so forth. And yes, I think all of those things are true, to a certain extent, but I’m not sure we appreciate exactly how lovely of an instance of crackfic this is.

More below the cut.

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|| enough ||

I’m still not over homecoming guys 💗💘

tags [permanent + peter parker]: @ghostedwolf , @lovelybaka , @animexchocolate, @fandom-flash , @psychicwitchphilosopher , @pharaohkiller , @moonlight53 , @literatureandimmature, @daydr3ams-away, @wannabe-weasley , @mcusebstan , @tmrhollandkay , @pepcvina , @nekonerdxox , @lokigirl18 , @fangeekkk , @kylielo22 , @wavy-ley , @lghockey , @buckysendoftheline , @1022bridgetp , @potterjamesharry , @mcheung0314 , @samanthasmileys , @melconnor2007 , @wingsanddarkness , @tiny-friggin-human , @anastasiaannaa

warnings: spoilers for homecoming, please don’t read if you haven’t watched the movie yet.

**please don’t repost/plagiarize this story. Reblogs are fine**

——

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Dating Wade Wilson Would Include

AN: This is going to be a bit more perverse than the other Would Includes because, hey, it’s Wade.


  • Being very confused when he starts talking to no-one and looking elsewhere tells the audience about how awesome and badass he is
    • You will get used to it, you have no other choice really
    • Sometimes you will also jokingly throw in something you want him to narrate (like how amazing you think he is or something that makes you seem wonderful)
      • This will always, without fail, result in Wade turning back to no-one the audience so he can gush about how wonderful you are

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I sometimes wonder how media consumption habits are being influenced by endings becoming the exception rather than the rule.

Like, when I was a kid, you could be pretty well assured that any long-form media you followed would have an ending; not necessarily for the “big picture” storylines, but at least for individual arcs. Most literature came in the form of printed novels, and it was highly unusual for any television show that survived its pilot episode to receive less than two full seasons, owing to how the economics of syndication worked; that’s why a lot of shows that are considered classics today have entire first seasons that are just plain terrible - they could afford to take that much time to find their feet.

These days, a story-driven TV show can get cancelled after three or four episodes if it’s not an immediate hit, and a lot of people consume sequential art and prose fiction primarily via web serials, whose one-page/chapter-at-a-time publication cycle means they can stop at any point - and let’s be honest, most of them do; web-based serialisation has enormously lowered economic barriers to global publication, and that’s awesome, but it’s also had the side effect of letting people with essentially no project management skills tackle media projects where they simply have no idea what they’re getting into.

The upshot is that we’ve got a whole generation for whom it’s understood as a matter of course that any long-form media you consume is more likely than not to just abruptly end mid-arc, mid-scene, or occasionally even mid-sentence* rather than having any sort of proper conclusion. I mean, sure, we still have novels and big-screen movies, but seriously: does anybody under the age of 30 actually get the majority of their media consumption from novels and big-screen movies these days?

* I’m not kidding about this one; I’ve seen multiple webcomics and at least one fanfic that really do end mid-sentence because the final published chapter or page ends with a dialogue break!

This Is War [4]
Request: jealous!bucky where he tries to outdo the guy in everything and its just ridiculous and funny (Again, wasn’t sure if this was an ACTUAL request, but I thought it would be fun as one :p)


Bucky Barnes X Reader

Word Count: 1328

Warnings: It’s a little boring maybe? This fic is developing by itself now.. 

 A/N: Holy!! The amount of support you guys are giving for this fic is amazing!! Thank you so much for reading and for all the likes and comments! Feedback is definitely what keeps me going, so thank you, so much!! 

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anonymous asked:

What are your favorite shark facts?

*screeches with glee* Alright nonnie, you have asked me the best question EVER!

Apologies for taking two days to reply to this, life was a bit hectic

.

Super Awesome Shark Facts

ONE

Sharks showed up 400 million years ago in the Devonian 358.9–298.9 aka “The Age of Fish” between the geological Silurian (443.8–419.2 million years ago) and the Carboniferous Periods (358.9–298.9 million years ago). By the time of the Carboniferous, we had amphibians and other small vertebrate creatures capable of crawling about on land. It’s during the Carboniferous Period that the continent of Pangaea first began to form (let that sink in for a second, the sharks were about before Pangaea even began to look like a continent, that’s how long these creatures have been about jfc). 

TWO

To date they’ve survived FIVE massive planet extinction events… ya know, those things that KILL PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING ON THE PLANET?? YEAH, THEM. We know of one that happened pretty recently in geological history; 65 million years ago when the dinosaurs went bye-bye. How fucking badass is that, Jesus Christ!

THREE

There’s currently over 500 types of Shark in the ocean at present (though not for long if people don’t stop KILLING THEM! CAN YOU NOT?!??). The most famous, of course, is the Great White (Carcharodon carcharias) and the Hammerhead (family: Sphyrnidae). For all that there’s a variety of Species, there are, of course, similarities in form and shape including cartilaginous skeletons (they’re literally made of the same stuff as the ridge of your nose is), enhanced electro-static senses (on their nose which is cute but also reason why if you boop them on the nose they ‘nope’ it out of the place; consider it not too dissimilar to bashing your funny bone and deciding to avoid that damned door in the future, same sort of logic tbh).

FOUR

You can pet a Shark on the nose. This isn’t really a fact so much as an interesting aside that I think is cute and adorable as shit so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[The still looks scary but honestly, he’s just giving the Tiger Shark a snack lol]

[I believe these are Lemon Sharks, which are fucking cute and I would cuddle one of them to the end of my life (I don’t have self-preservation instincts tho soooo)]

FIVE

You have a higher chance of dying from being attacked by hornets, wasps, bees, dogs and even a fucking coconut (if you live in Asia) than you do of being killed by a Shark. How’s that for some mad stats?

SIX

As I’ve said, Sharks have survived FIVE massive planet extinction events but, currently, 20-30% of Sharks are close to extinction because of us, humans. Commercial fishing means Sharks get caught on hooks and nets; homeopathic remedies that require parts of Sharks for them to ‘work’; and Shark Fin Soup all contribute to the decline of these amazing creatures that have lived on this planet longer than even our most distant ancestor has.

SEVEN

Thanks to the media and stupid ass people who think they know everything from a movie marathon of the Jaws series, people think all Sharks are man-eating monsters that want to murder anyone who dares go for a swim in the open water. Here’s the thing though, 97% of over 500 Shark species are HARMLESS to us. The ones that ARE harmful tends to be because we’re in THEIR space and fucking up THEIR shit (personally, I’d beat your ass too if you came near my home so IDK why anyone thinks Sharks are evil; they’re just animals).

EIGHT

The reason why so many Shark attacks happen in California and places like South Africa is simply because of the abundance of food for Sharks; Great Whites especially. Seals, Sea Lions, and Sea Otters are all on the menu for the Great White and us pesky ass humans keep getting in their way. It’s not their fault they mistake us for food. Honest mistake.

NINE

Connected to EIGHT. Most of the time, people die from a Shark BITE but the Shark doesn’t come back for a second time (usually) because, unlike pretty much every other species that’s evolved on this planet, Sharks don’t have the opportunity to test what something is before using their teeth on it. Humans bleed out horrendously fast, especially in water, so the cause of death for most Shark attacks is blood loss and shock, not actually being eaten by a Shark.

TEN

Whale Sharks are the largest Sharks on record out of all current, living Shark species. They can be over 13 metres in length and, while they look scary considering how humans usually don’t go past 2 metres (imagine seven people stood on top of each other and you’ve got an idea of how long a Whale Shark is), Whale Sharks are the most docile creatures ever. They’re quite similar to Whales (hence the name) that live on plankton, for example the Blue Whale, and are absolutely gorgeous.

.

Hopefully these have been somewhat educational (while interspersed with my delightful attitude) and everyone can go on with their lives a little more aware and knowledgeable about Sharks.

Originally posted by amnhnyc