i m laughing so f much

anonymous asked:

So one time this guy asked me if I was Vietnamese, and I said yes. (Cuz I am) and then he said, "I thought you were Asian for a second" and then I went crazy because geography - VIETNAM IS IN ASIA - anyway, have you ever had an encounter like that?

HAHAHAH OMG that’s actually so funny though this had me laughing so much last night but I forgot to answer it sorry! omg nothing has really happened like that to me but my pet peeve is when people I don’t know like people selling a charity on the street or some random at a music festival says “oo hey where are you from?” as if we HAD to come from overseas just because we’re asian like f off I’m from here??? once my friend actually said that to someone because we were drunk ahh

Got7 Reaction: Their crush is bored so they draw on their hand

anon asked: Hello , I’m the anon that requested the got7 reaction when you draw on their hand c: And yes they have a really huge crush on you ^^ Thank you so much for your work and I’m really excited for this reaction :)

Hello anon! I hope you really like it!! ~Em

Mark: *tries to stay cool, calm, and collected, but ends up laughing because it tickles*

Originally posted by infinitblaq

Jackson: With his crush: calm and adorable, praises them for their artistic skills and calls them amazing

Originally posted by jarkson7

When his crush leaves and he’s alone: “YES! THAT’S RIGHT!!! THEY CHOSE ME AS THEIR CANVAS I’M A PIECE OF THEIR ART NOW! F*** YEA!!!”

Originally posted by got7gifs

Jaebum: *cutely lays his head on their head when they’re done drawing and praises them for how cute they are*

Originally posted by nevertrustkpop

Junior: *tries to be cool but ends up creeping out his crush with his crazy eyes*

Originally posted by the-princejinyoung

Youngjae: on the outside he’d blush and not be able to look at his crush until they’re done, and when he sees what they drew he just sort of starts screaming about how awesome it is (even if it sucks) and doesn’t stop until his crush is the one blushing

Originally posted by jackseunie

Yugyeom: *admires his crush’s face while they’re so up close and he gets caught staring more than once*

Originally posted by jitonic

BamBam: *tries acting cool but basically makes himself look like a dweeb*

Originally posted by polarbeom

“Trust me, you’re going to love him.” You reassured Y/F/N, linking your arm with hers as you led her towards the front door of Niall’s place. 

“I’m good as long as you’re happy. You seem to be fine, so I don’t think I need to worry that much.” Y/F/N sighed, giving your hand a quick pat. You grinned when the front door opened up quickly, Niall stepping outside with a polite smile on his face. “Look at that - We didn’t even have to ring the doorbell, he was already waiting!” She snorted, Niall’s cheeks growing red as he let out a small laugh. 

“Hey, Ni.” You cooed, pulling away from Y/F/N to give your boyfriend a quick hug and a kiss before turning to gesture to your friend. “This is Y/F/N!” You watched as they exchanged a firm handshake, Niall moving aside to let Y/F/N into the house. Niall was usually great with meeting your friends, but he knew you and Y/F/N had been friends ever since you were young - So obviously it was a little intimidating meeting her. 

“What are you cooking? It smells really good.” Y/F/N turned to glance at Niall before plopping herself down on the couch. 

“Spaghetti.” Niall replied, closing the door behind him and walking towards the kitchen before stopping. “Oh, garlic bread! Can’t forget about t’e garlic bread.” 

“Mm, Y/N’s favourite.” Y/F/N hummed, watching as you joined her on the couch. 

“Can I get ya a drink? Water, pop - I can make ya a martini or somet’ing if you’d like.” 

“Water’s fine.” 

“You don’t have to act so cold.” You whispered to Y/F/N, pursing your lips as she rolled her eyes. 

“You have to intimidate the guy to let him know you’re the one in control. And I have to give off the impression that if he hurts you, I’ll hurt him.” 

“Here’s your water.” Niall walked back into the living room, Y/F/N thanking him as she took the glass from him. He took a seat across from her, grinning when you walked over to join him.

“So, you guys really like each other?” Y/F/N hummed, her fingers drumming against the side of the glass. Niall’s cheeks were dusted with pink as he cleared his throat, pulling you onto his lap. You couldn’t help but coo at how cute he looked, and how obviously nervous he was about this. 

“I mean.. Yeah, I really like Y/N, and I’m pretty sure Y/N likes me..” Niall replied quietly, whining when you pressed a kiss to his cheek. He was really trying to impress Y/F/N and you were embarrassing him! “I promise I won’t hurt Y/N, I know t’at’s t’e t’ing you’re most concerned about, but for real, I won’t do anyt’ing bad! I’ll be t’e greatest boyfriend in the world.” 

“Oh, god. You don’t have to get into the cheesy stuff. I was just asking so that I could tell you to use protection.” Y/F/N smirked, taking a sip of her water when Niall’s eyes grew wide. “What? I’m just saying - I really hope you guys aren’t goofing around without-” 

Hey, how’s the garlic bread coming along?”  


gif isn’t mine!

Why do you care? Fake ah crew!Michael x Best Friend!Cockbite!Reader

OMG when i got sent this promt i was like “ imma cry” and then i wrote it and i was like “ imMA CRYYYYYY” but seriously tho i love this prompt so f*cking much and might do more parts to it if you guys want?I’m really proud of this, so i hope you guys enjoy and hope it brought you was much pain as it did to me.

“ You really gonna go down that easy punk?” The man sneered as he swung at michael, who dodged and sent him a glare.

Michael laughed and spat on the floor, blood dribbling down his lip.This was his last round for the night, and the guy was huge.But Michael needed the cash and was a frequent in this fight club. So now way in hell was he going down.

“ You don’t know a lot about me, do you fuckface?” Michael asked and raised his fist. “ So i’ll tell ya a little somethin’ about me-’


The man fell down with a loud thud as his eyes rolled into the back of his head. Michael grinned as the crowd went crazy.

“ I don’t go down easy.” He said and walked off before going up to the big man, the one who runs the fight club.

“ Nice job jonesy.” He said with a smile and Michael glared.

“ Thanks, “ He said harshly and reached out for the cash, only for the man to retracted his hand.

“ You know..” He began and Michael groaned. Every goddamn time with this guy.” I got a job that would be great for you, there’s a guy who owes me, rough him up for me?” He asked and Michael shook his head.

“ I’ve told you this before Mark, i don’t to personal offers.” He said and mark scoffed.

“ How about you go tell that to your little toy y/n huh?” He asked smugly and Michael felt his blood boil. Oh that was the last straw.

He grabbed mark by the neck…but froze when you called out.

“ Jesus Christ Jones.” You sighed. “ Just leave the bastard alone and let’s go, i am your ride anyways.” You said and Michael nodded.

“ Fine.” He said and took his cash, sending mark a deadly look. “ Be lucky she’s here or you’d be dead. See you next week markie.” He said and caught up with you and took in your look.

You wore your usual attire, a muscle shirt (that was his) a pair of shorts and a crooked grin.Your body was covered in bloody bruises and cuts from your fights of the nights, but the thickening of your wallet and your mood made it clear you were victorious.

“ So, you kick-ass tonight?” He asked and you grinned.

“ Hell yeah, what’d you expect?” you asked and he chuckled, your attitude always lifted his mood.” What about you, heard your last round was rough.” You said and he nodded.

“ Yeah, but the guy was dumb enough to talk shit while fighting, so i hit him real hard and he went down.” He said and threw an arm around your shoulder.

“ So, how about we go get shit face drunk and then i pass out on your couch?” He asked and you laughed, your e/c eyes shining with amusement.

“ No way mikey.” You said and he whined. “ You need to save up for rent, besides i got a few beers at my place so you can get buzzed and save up.”  You said and he rolled his eyes.

“ Buzzkill.”

“ Just shut up and get in douche-bag.” You said in your car and he smirked.

“ Yes mam.”


“ Idiot.” You laughed quietly as you watch Michael sleep peacefully on your couch, cradling a beer bottle like a baby in front of your tv. You.You turned it off and threw a blanket on him before going into your own room and settling down for the night.

Many people thought of you and Michael of lovers, but it was quite the opposite. You were both best friends, two people with unfortunate luck who happened to meet in an underground fight club.Every night you would go and beat the shit out of people to earn enough money so you could stay in your shitty one room apartment.Michael fought at the same place, he was a newbie while you were a veteran there, after his first fight he got pummeled, laying on the ground with a bloody nose and black eye. Then you walk over and offer him your hand with a smile. You told him he sucked, and was probably going to die if he fought again. But before he was able to cuss you out you offered to teach him a few fighting styles so he could win. He reluctantly accepted and eventually you both became a bit of a team.

“ What an idiot, this isn’t nearly enough.” You mumbled as you looked over his earnings and sighed. “ he’s gonna go homeless if he keeps bringing in this much cash, guess i’m going out again.” You said as you slipped on your jacket, grabbing your mask and gun before heading out to the closest gas station.

You knew you should feel ashamed, guilty in any way. But you didn’t. God knows why but you knew it was going for a good cause, keeping a friend off the streets. The adrenaline pumping, the blood rushing through your veins, for some reason you craved the feeling once you got a small taste. You weren’t ever going back.


“ So you can’t tell me anything about the job?” You asked and Michael sighed, scratching the back of his neck with an awkward look on his face.

“ No i can’t, i’m sorry.” He said and you sighed.

Michael had told you had had been offered a jobs a few days ago that he was going to accept. Although it required him to move to los santos, which broke your heart.

“ Listen..” He said and gave you a sad look.” I’m really excited about his job, i’ll finally be financially safe, with no worries!” He said and you shrugged.

“ I wish i could trust you Michael.” You said and he sighed, pulling you into a hug.

“ I know y/n/n, but you gotta just take my word on it, okay?” He asked and you sighed, deciding on lying to him instead.

“ Alright, just..try and be careful, okay?” You pleaded and he smiled.

“ I’ll try my best y/n.” He said and made a finger gun at you.” I’ll come by and visit i promise!” He offered and you chuckled sadly, shaking your head from side to side.

“ Don’t make promises you can’t keep Jones.” You said before shutting the door in walking to your room.

He was gone.He never came by to visit as you expected, but he called everyday for a few weeks, and then stopped. You weren’t surprised at all by the notion. He’s not the kind of guy who stays in contact after a while. Once he left you quit fight club and began to commit more crimes, robbing stores, pick-pocketing guys in fancy suits, and one day, one special little day you did it. You finally killed somebody.

It was in the middle of the night, walking home rather drunkenly from the bar when you heard a muffled scream. In the back of a dark alley a woman was pinned against a wall by a man who held a knife a little too close to her for your comfort. You didn’t quite know what is was that took over you that night. Maybe it was you trying to be the hero you never were, maybe protective instincts kicked in, maybe you just wanted to feel needed, or maybe you just then realized just how sick the world truly is.

But there you were, covered in bruises and blood, standing over the man’s dead body holding a stained knife, the woman cowering behind you. You asked her is she was alright, but it was barely possible to while she praised you for saving her, something felt…..off about it but you shrug it away. You offered her to stay the night with you until the morning which she gladly accepted.

You were awoken in the morning, a little too early for your liking by the obnoxious loud knocking at your door. When you swung it open to tell whoever it was to fuck off, you were met with a man with curly hair and a big smile.

“ Hi there, i’m burnie burns.” He said, holding out his hand for you to shake. “ And i just want to thank you so much for saving Barbara last night, i honestly can’t describe how relieved i was when  she called me.” He said and you nodded.

Burnie burns….you knew that name and the stories it held, one of the most feared man in los santos. For a bit you were concerned it was a trap, the girl in the alley who was apparently named Barbara, the man assaulting her, was it a trap?

“ It was nothing really.” You said with a yawn.” I just hate seeing good people getting hurt.” You said and Barbara smiled.

“ See burnie, what did i tell ya?” She said with a smile.” Strong morals, good moves, she’s perfect.” Barbara said and burnie nodded.

“ You were right barb i’ll give you that.” He said and stepped into your apartment, causing you to tense up. Yup, definitely a trap.

“ What the hell are you-”

“ What’d you do with the body?” He asked and you sent him an odd look.

“What?” You asked and he rolled his eyes.

“ The body from last night, what’d you do with it.”

“ I burned it,” You said. “ wrapped him up and cloth, soaked him in gasoline and burnt him to ashes while your friend was asleep.” She said and pointed to Barbara.

Burnie smiled and nodded.” Good, good.so..if you haven’t heard there’s been a new criminal rising in this town.” He said as he looked over your bookshelf and Barbara kept her eyes trained on you.

“ They’ve been robbing small places, but they’re slowly working up.” He said and turned to you. “ You got any idea of who it is?” He asked and you chuckled.

“ Well it seems like you have it figured out, so you really need me to answer you?” You asked and he laughed.

“ Oh i like you.” He said and held out his hand.” So here’s our offer, come join my crew, and you have a home, family, friends, and you’ll never have to worry about paying rent again.” He offered you nodded, taking his hand in yours.

“ When  do i start?”


“ This should be an easy one guys, get in, and get out before they come okay?” Burnie asked over the comm and you snickered.

“ Man boss, sex with you must be super disappointing huh?” You joked. “ I feel bad for Ashley.” You said and heard the woman laugh.

“ You know it rag doll.” She said, using your code name.” But i can’t distract this guard forever, so hurry up.” She ordered and you nodded.

You were crouched on the top of a building, watching the blonde woman converse with a guard through the scope of your gun.

“ Security cameras are out.” Gus said as he typed in thousands of codes a minutes and you grinned.

“ Looks like it’s my turn.” You said and pulled the trigger, watching the dart fly from the barrel of your gun and into the man’s neck, rendering him unconscious in a second.

“ He’ll be out for a few seconds so i suggest we hurry up.” You said as you jumped from roof to roof and heard joel scoff through the comms.

“ Seriously?A non-lethal again? Why don’t you just shoot the bastard and then it’ll be much easier?” He asked and you rolled your eyes. This conversation again.

“ Because that leaves a trail for them to follow, making it easier to find us. I may have moral but i’m not stupid joel.” You hissed and he went silent. Even though you were  criminal you had a strong moral code you would abide by. Kill those who deserve to be killed.It was a simple code, made things easier for you. Sometimes it was a bit tricky but it set you aside from many of the other criminals in los santos.

“ She’s not wrong.” Barbara pointed out.” So i suggest we let her beat to her own drum, seems to be working for us right now.” She said and you smiled.

“ Thanks B, i can always count on you.” You said to the sniper and she giggled. Ever since she and burnie recruited you you guys became best friends.

“ Enough tea time kids,” Matt said over the phone.” Hurry up, get what you can and get the hell outta there.” He said and you nodded as you jumped down from a building and landed safely on your feat.

“ I’m on it boss.” You said and ran into the building.

“ That girl is like a goddamn cat.” Adam muttered as he and joel walked in behind you and you smiled under your mask.

“ How do you think i stole your chocolate stash without you noticing?” You asked before getting to work on a safe as he processed what you just said.


“ Enough arguing.” Gus ordered and you all complied.” I’m checking stoplights cameras a few streets down and there’s some cars on their way over, fast. “ He said and ashley shrugged as she shoved money into a dufflebag.

“ Maybe their just heading down this road?” She asked and joel shook his head.

“ With our look?Probably not.” He said and grabbed his gun.

“ Aaron, barbara, keep an eye out, okay?” He asked and they both agreed.

“ You got it Gold, “ They said with his codename.

“ Ashley, y/n, grab as much as you can and then haul ass.” He said and you nodded.

“ Got it, what’s got you so on edge?” You asked him and adam sighed.

“ He’s got a feeling.” He said and you cringed.

Oh no…a feeling. Whenever joel said he had a feeling it usually meant they were about to hit the jackpot, or somebody was going to get killed. And something tells me it’s not the first option.

As you and ashley continued to fill up duffle bags barbara voice broke through.

“ There parked a few blocks down, wearing black and have a lot of bags. I think they had the same idea as us to rib this place.” She said with a laugh and you chuckled.

“ Yeah well they’re a bit late, it’s cleaned out.” You said proudly as you saw the numerous bags filled to the brim with cash and opened the back door.

“ Lets pack up and get out of here.” You said and ashley nodded.

“ You gets get it all in the car and get out, we’ll handle this.” Joel said and you turned around.

“What the hell are you guys talking about?” You asked.” If were fast enough we can all get out of here, now.” You said and adam shook his head.

“ If somebody isn’t left behind for them to fight they’ll get suspicious and try to follow us.” He said and you sighed.

“ Alright, be safe losers.” You said before going out and loading up the car with ashley.

“ Will they be okay?” You asked and she chuckled.

“ Kid, i think they’re more worried about you than themselves, why do you think they’re staying back instead of coming with?” She asked and you tilted your head to the side and took off your mask.

You are the newest member of the crew, even though it had been a few months you felt like you had integrated well with them. Yet majority still saw you as somebody they needed to protect, and they had a right reason to. Your strong moral code, your way of living, protect those who can’t protect themselves, keep the little guy from getting stomped on. It was truly admirable and they wanted you to stay that way, and if anybody tried to change that they were never going to see the light of day again.

“ Guys, it’s them.” Aaron said and you heard gus scoff.

“ Aaron, how many fucking times to i have to say this? Stop play the goddamn pronoun game and just say who it is!” He shouted loud enough for everybody to cringe.

“ It the fake ah crew, and they’re going in.” They said and you looked at ashley with a frightened look.

You knew of the fake ah crew, not much, but enough to know they were a force to be reckoned with. You also knew that their leader had a history with the leaders of the cockbites, but you didn’t ask since it felt like a sore subject for him.

“ They’ll be okay.” Ashley said and you both jumped at the sound of a bullet in the air.

“ I Sure about that?” You asked with a raised brow and barbra cussed.

“ Fuck!They’ve got a sniper up there and he’s good, but i think we can take him, get out now and we’ll hold them off.” She said as she and aaron began to rapid fire.

You knew you should go, it was the smart thing to do. But something inside you, every fiber in your body told you to stay, you didn’t know why or what yet, but you knew you had to stay.

“ Go.” You told ashley.

“What?” She asked.” Y/n i’m not leaving you behind, you’re too-”

“ I was in a fight club for 3 years and now i’m apart of the cockbites.” You said with a smile.” I can handle myself, but we need at least one person to get away with a the haul.And that’s you, besides.” You said as you flashed her a grin before putting on your mask.” They don’t call me rag doll for nothing.” You said and she sighed.

“ Alright, but be safe sweetie, if those bastards lay a hand on you i’ll rip them limb from limb.” She growled before driving off, causing you to laugh.

“ Alrighty fuckers. You said as you grabbed your gun and opened the back door.” Let’s see how good the fake ah crew really is.” You said.

You crept through the back door to hear conversation, not fighting, no gunshots, but merely two men talking. As you crept up to the second floor to get a better view you watched in curiosity.

Joel and adam stood in front of the crew, with was at least 7 people, one in the front you who assumed to be the leader, wore a suit and a big mustache was talking to joel, and he sure didn’t look happy. He must be the one burnie meant.

“ Listen joel.” He said.” You give us some of the cash and we’ll get out of your hair. We’ve been planning this heist for weeks, right boys?” he asked and his crew grumbled and shouted in agreement. One voice sounded familiar but it was too faint to recognize.

I’m afraid we can’t do that geoff.” He said, “ they’ve already left. But please, feel free to scavenge for whatever scraps were left behind.” Joel said with a smile.” That is what you do best isn’t it?”

“ YOU BASTARD!” One shouted angrily with a thick british accent as he grabbed his gun and aimed for joel’s face.

“ Eat lead you-ach!” He let out a loud shout as a dart flew from the barrel of your gun and landed in his neck. As much as you wanted to kill them you knew you couldn’t. You knew your bosses still had feelings for these men, they were family, family that left yes, but still family i suppose, and you knew that feeling better than anybody.

“ What the hell?” Their leader shouted and looked up to where you are. “ You fuckers got a sniper?Oh unfair dude!” He shouted and one of them ran towards the stair while another in a skull mask began to shoot at you.

“ Y/n no!” Joel shouted and cussed.” I fucking told her to go! Damnnit.” He said and sent geoff a cold look.” As much as i’d like for this to stay civilized, i’m afraid i can’t let a member of my crew get hurt.” He said and sent them a terrifying smile as adam raised his machine gun.

“ So, who’s gonna die first, hmm??”


“ Shit they’re fast.” You said as you ran down a hall, loud footsteps and gunshots after you.You grabbed the pistol from your side, ran on top of a desk and jumped, propelling yourself forward as you landed safely on the balcony.

“ Where the fuck did they go!” One shouted angrily and you froze, you knew that voice all too well.

“ Don’t know, can you handle them on your own?”Skull mask asked and his partner nodded.

“ Yeah, go help the others i’ll find this douche and kill him fast.” He said and his partner nodded before running back to the entrance of the bank.

“ Come out, come out, wherever you arrrre.” He sang as he crept slowly in the dark building in search of you.

“ Nonononono, it can’t be him it-it can’t be!” You whispered to yourself as you let tears slide down your face. Michael, the Michael you knew wasn’t exactly the sweetest person but he was a good man, definitely not the kind who killed innocent people as his crazy crew member lights a building on fire.

He wasn’t like you, you stood up for the little people, stole from those who didn’t earn it, killed those who took advantage of the weak. He was the exact opposite of you.

As you thought all of this out by yourself you felt your blood boil, you were getting more pissed by the second. Sadly during this you hadn’t notice him creep behind you until he grabbed you by your neck and threw you into a wall.

“ Aha!” He laughed as he took out his gun.” Looks like i finally found you ya shit-head. Now it’s time for you to die.” He said and shrugged with a grin as he slid off his mask. Yes, it was him. “ No hard feelings right?” He asked.

You knew Michael Jones like the back of your hand, he was arrogant, cocky, strong, confidant, and never backed down from a fight. Ha, what an idiot.

You got up and raised your fists, signaling you wanted to beat him in hand to hand combat.

“ Ah, you prefer the old fashioned way?” He asked and shrugged, dropping his gun and raising his fist.” Fine by me, But i’ll have you know.” He said with a grin. “ I was trained by the best.” He said and you chuckled, causing him to freeze.

“ I know,” You said and ran forward.

“ Wait a min-” His order was cut off when you slammed your fist into his face and sent him tumbling to the floor.

“ Ah fuck, you’ve got a good swing i’ll give ya that but i am going to-”

“ You’re going to what?” You asked angrily as you took off your mask and saw his eyes go wide.” You’re going to kill me? I know it wouldn’t be that hard for you to do, now would it jonesy?” You snapped and his eyes went wide before narrowing into slits.

“Y/n!?!What the hell are you doing here?” He asked and grabbed your arm, as if he were trying to protect you.

“ Well we were looting the place before you guys showed up.” You snapped and shoved his arm away.

“ Wait a minute…y-you’re a cockbite?” He asked angrily.” What the hell!?Why the fuck would you join them they’re a bunch of-”

“ A bunch of what michal?” You asked and began to walked toward him, and every time you did he would take a step back.” Criminals?Thieves?Killers?Because those are exactly what fake ah crew is. So don’t act all high and mighty when you’re apart of one of the most violent, dangers, murderous groups in los santos!” You shouted and he scoffed.

“Quit trying to act like you’re fucking better than me y/n!” He shouted and pushed you back.” So what?Yeah i’m a criminal, but so are you! So don’t act like somehow you’re better than me.” He snapped.” And i know damn well that you must’ve killed a bunch of innocent people just like me, you’re nothing but a killer who doesn’t want to accept the cold hard truth that-” He was cut off when you slammed him to the floor and pinned him down, holding a steel knife against his throat, the same knife you committed your first kill.

“ Don’t you dare finish that sentence.” You hisses.” I am nothing like you, “ You spat angrily, “ I have morals, i kill those who deserve it, unlike you, you and your crew just prance around doing what you want, killing whoever you want.” You said, tears sliding down your cheeks.” But you’re right michael.” You said with a sad chuckle.” The cockbites is full of murderers, theivs, and some of the worst crimminals in los santos, but so is the fake ah crew.so don’t get so mad that i joined the cockbites.” You stated.” But the real question is, why do you care so much?” You asked and you were both silent. You looked around and heard no commotion, no fighting, shouting or gunshots from anybody else. It was eerily silent, and that never meant something good.

“ Looks like they’ve come to a resolve.” You said as you tried to get up, only to freeze in shock when you heard a gunshot and a searing pain in your side.

“ Y/N!” Michael shouted as you fell back and he cradled you in his arms, seeing the blood ooze out of your side.

“ Nonono, oh God no.” He said and you tried to wiggle out of his grasp but were too weak to do so.

“ D-don’t.” You stuttered.” Don’t be so nicey nice now because you-”

“ Hey.” He said in tilted your chin so you were staring right at him. “ As much as i want you yell a scream at you for being a dirty little cockbite, and i’d really love to. You’re about to die if i don’t get you to a hospital soon so how about we stick a pin in our little argument, kay?” He asked and you smiled weakly, feeling yourself lose consciousness.

“ Alright mikey.” You mumbled and then saw joel and adam come into view.

“ Y/N NO!” Joel shouted and raised his gun at michael, you instantly tried to protect him but couldn’t.

“ JOEL NO DON-” The sound of a gunshot and a shout coming from an unfamiliar voice was the last thing you remembered before everything went dark.

*LOUD SCREAMING* WHY DID I DO DIS!?!?!?WHAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!?!??!Please tell me if you guys want a part two and PLEASE tell me if theres something specific you would want to happen, i love hearing your guys input.I hope youre all happy and well!Goodnight lovelies!


@winniemoon (my lil ray of sunshine) tagged me so I guess I must do it

a / age: 19

b / biggest fear:  Ocean, that place scares the shit outta me, thanks 10th grade Oceanography.

c / current time: 4:42 pm

d / drink you had last: Dr. Pepper Cherry, I’m obsessed

e / everyday starts with: Wondering why I’m awake in the first place

f / favourite song: Without Me by Eminem

g / ghosts are real?: Uh, I do go to alot of “haunted” placed and have had one encounter so I pretty much believe in them

h / hometown: Rich White Suburban City ™, California

i / in love with: Josh Brolin, and @audiocircus ‘s Garbage Dad.

j / jealous of: Nothing really, except people with kittens

k / killed someone: 👀 what are you, a Narc?

l / last time you cried: When I cried laughing over the SUper sweet anon I got.

m / movie genre:  Gore, the Bloodier the better imo

n / number of siblings:  2, one older and one younger brother.

o / one wish: Is Cody Carson Naked acceptable??

p / person you last called/texted: My brother, telling him his stupid butt left his brand new car unlocked.

q / questions you’re always asked: “Why do you do this?” “Why are you like this?” “Can I get some nudes? ((;”

r / reasons to smile: My pets, and my Friends ((:

s / song last sang: Jack Sparrow by the Lonely Island

t / Tattoos: one big ass one on my hip/thigh and many more to come ((:           

u / underwear colour: burgundy and leopard print, hope yah happy ya pervs

v / vacation destination: Ireland, cause its so green.

w / worst habit: Playing with my hair,

x / xrays you have had: whole body basically I have a broken pelvis (in multiple places), sacrum, sternum, collarbone, and several bones in me back.. did I get them all?

y / your favourite food: These weird chicken sandwiches from Costco ((:

I tag @gnomesims cause I love them, AND ANYONE ELSE WHO WISHES TO DO THIS ((:

asterbatics  asked:

dickroy?? also talondickie just for f un

NOTP || Just no || Meh || Neutral || Good Potential || Ship it || OTP || JUST FUCK ALREADY  

i like dickroy ???  love it on some accounts.  its just one of those ships where ???  i  will go hardcore shipping if i am writing it with the  right  person.  its not something i will search for with just anyone. 

NOTP || Just no || Meh || Neutral || Good Potential || Ship it || OTP || JUST FUCK ALREADY

laughs nervously i  a m – such  trash  for talondickie.  i love these babies so very much. i have always loved dark relationships and these two are definitely that.  talon would do anything for dickie even if that means killing, i weep over the amount of love my murder birb has for the detective. 

(  do i ship it ? ;; accepting. @asterbatics  ) !

these drunk dudes in the apt downstairs are outside talking about “"relationships”“ and one of them tells another guy in the group ‘dude i’m so proud of u for being faithful to ur girl’ and the other guys all start laughing then he says 'i mean it’s really easy to do it if u’ve got the right b*tch but if u don’t it’s really f*cking hard’ and the other guys all murmured in agreement like he was saying something really groundbreaking i hate men so much lol!!!!!

So if you’re feeling kinda down today, please just imagine Anders learning a piano version of some shitty pop song and Hawke starts singing along really badly and it just becomes this terrible duet that ends in them both laughing hysterically and they look at each other with that big-eyed “I’m so lucky I found you look” and there is so much love I just…

Ok, carry on.

Funny Scene between Guren and Shinya 7

Extracted from Ons Light Novel 4 Chapter 4

Shinya: I didn’t get rescued, so Guren owes me? o((*^▽^*))o

Guren: Your face keeps smiling like an idiot and makes people angry so it doesn’t matter. ( ಠ ಠ )

Shinya: You’re jealous that I’m more handsome than you? ∠( ᐛ 」∠)_

Guren laughed at this.

Guren: I think you should already know, it’s me that’s more popular? Even your woman chose me. ( ̄ω ̄)

Shinya squinted at him speechlessly.

Shinya: Ah~ I spent so much effort saving you and you still say that? ε-(>o<)

Guren: It’s the truth. (•̀⌄•́)

Shinya: F*** you, man.  凸ಠ益ಠ)凸


Guren: I’d like to see you try. 

If a waiter hits on my girlfriend during dinner, he's gonna have a bad time.

A few years back I took a girl on a date to The Macaroni Grill. The waiter, a good looking broseph type, came over eventually and was immediately pretty friendly towards my girl, who I’d been seeing for a few months at that point. It was off-putting, but I’m a pretty mellow guy and she and I were having fun, so I didn’t think much of it. She noticed it too, and we joked about it as he got our drinks. She decides she wants to go with it, see if we can get a good laugh from it - we’re both really into pranks.

He comes back with the drinks and, I assume because I was acting beta as f*ck, actually starts hitting on her in front of me. Not in an offensive way, but it was clear what was up and had she and I not already been really close it would have been very uncomfortable.

He brags to my date that he can write his name upside down, which he does on our table. He then says that he’s been practicing writing his phone number upside down too, but he needs more practice. He then writes his number down under his name. Upside down to him, but oriented straight towards my date. More one-sided flirting as he takes our orders and leaves. She was actually pretty great and was subtly messing with him and hinting that she’s into some weird stuff.

At this point I text my friend who works at this place during college semesters. Turns out she’s there working that night and I track her down and explain that one of her wait staff is hitting on my girl directly in front of me. Her immediate reaction: “Oh God, It’s Barry isn’t it?” - It was. He’s apparently known for this type of thing. She apologizes and asks how I’d like it handled (comped drinks, talking to Barry, etc). I tell her what my date and I had planned.

Barry continues his behavior for the remainder of the evening and my date continues with her friendly, freaky subterfuge. I eventually pay the check and my date leaves the tip with a note:

“Give me a call sometime. Make it dirty… - Beck”

She jots down the assistant manager’s phone number on the note and we take off.

Days later my friend gets back to me with the results. He called her up thinking it was B. He leads off with “So you ready to let a real man take you to dinner, or does your freak self want to skip right to bed?” Classy. My friend tells him what really happened, and that he can explain his behavior to the manager, or she will. He never came back to work after that.

Beta as f*ck.

side note:

Keep reading

You can try, Dipper, but there is no escape from M U L L E T   H  E  L  L .

This was so much fun to draw! And with a steady supply of mullet in the fandom I know I’ll always be able to look back on mankind’s longest-running affront to god and have a good laugh, post-Valentine End Times or no. Kudos to @immaplatypus​, @aspiring-procrastinator​, @taccoman​ and everyone else who has dedicated so much time and sanity to bringing back the 70′s greatest tonsorial mistake.

Annoying - Luke

Requested - “could you do one where you are secretly dating Luke and your friend likes him so she acts all annoying around him (that probably made no sense)”

This is so bad, I’m sorry. It’s really shit. I tried 😔


You felt awful. For the past hour, you’d been listening to Y/F/N talk about various parts of your boyfriend’s body and how much she loves them. From “don’t you just want to bite his bottom lip?” to “his legs are more perfect than I thought humanly possible”, you’d heard it all, until she ultimately decides that “he’s too perfect” and therefore “can’t be real”. You nod along, laugh when you think it’s appropriate and try not to show just how awkward you feel by this conversation. You thought that interrupting her by saying “yeah, he loves it when you bite his lip” wouldn’t be the best idea.

You couldn’t say anything to anybody. The only people who knew that you and Luke were together, other than the two of you, were Ash, Cal and Mike. Even then, it was difficult for Michael to keep his mouth shut at times. Luke hated that you’d asked to keep it a secret, he didn’t understand why you wanted it that way, but you didn’t want to embarrass Y/F/N even further by admitting the extent of the mammoth crush she had on him.

You had always liked Luke as more than a friend, but knowing the way Y/F/N felt, you’d tried to stay away. Tried, and failed. The two of you just clicked. You’d answer his ridiculous question when others would laugh them off, he’d laugh at the lame puns you came up with, even just little, silly things, like he always knew what drink to order for you, or he’d sit with you for hours on end watching cartoons. It was easy to be with him, but you’d been adamant to yourself that you and Luke could only ever be friends. That was until that one night, the night of the party you hadn’t even wanted to go to. Y/F/N had forced you to go, because “Luke will be there and tonight could be the night!” You’d gone along for moral support, trying to contain the dread you felt if it turned out Luke wanted to be with her. Two hours into the party, Y/F/N was drunk and embarrassing herself in every possible way, making it painfully and cringingly obvious to anyone in a 10 mile radius that Luke was her goal for the night. You’d tried to subtly move her away from a confused (and quite frankly, scared) Luke, but she’d been relentless. He’d made her sit down to stop her from falling over, as he went to fetch her a glass of water, and you could see from the look in her eyes that this kindness he displayed to her made her want him even more. For the next twenty minutes, you’d had to listen to a hiccuping Y/F/N tell Luke in detail how perfect his butt was. Luke kept giving her sips of water, as you rubbed circles on her back, praying she wouldn’t be sick. For all of how annoying and embarrassing Y/F/N was acting, Luke acted nothing less than a perfect gentleman. After she fell asleep, he had carried her up to an empty bedroom and the two of you left her there to sleep it off, glass of water and painkillers on the bedside table.

“I’m so sorry about her, she’s not normally like this,” you feel that you need to stick up for your friend’s actions, “she’s just working hard lately and she obviously needed to let go, she’s really lovely and sweet normally, I promi…”

“Y/N, it’s fine,” he stops your rambling, smiling, “I know she’s not usually like this, she just had too much to drink. We’ve all done it. Do you want to go outside for a bit? You look like you need to get some fresh air.” Nodding at him, you allow him to lace his fingers through yours, ignoring how your hand tingled when he touched it, to pull you through the house and outside. He glances at your interlocked fingers, his thumb rubbing the back of your hand, showing no intention of letting go.

“It was quite nice to hear someone give so many compliments about my butt though” he laughs.

“Oh god, can we not tell her about any of this in the morning? She’ll be so embarrassed” you chew on your lip, your brow furrowed.

“Hey, of course I won’t” he turns so he’s stood in front of you, “don’t look so worried. She was just drunk, she didn’t mean any of it.” He shrugs, before using your still entwined hands to pull you towards him.

“So, you don’t think she meant it when she said you have a nice arse?” You grin.

“You have a nice arse” he smirks, as you hit his arm with your free hand.

“You shouldn’t be looking!” you try not to laugh. His eyes turn serious as he looks into yours. This is the moment you should have made a joke and walked away, said you had to leave and go and take your friend home. You absolutely shouldn’t have been staring into those blue eyes, hoping more than anything that the feelings you had for him were mutual, but he leant forward to kiss you, and you let him.

“I want to be with you” he whispers, pulling away, knotting his fingers in your hair to hold you close to him. You should have told him that the kiss was a mistake, that you didn’t want to be with him, but you didn’t, because that would have been a lie. So instead you told him that you felt the same, and pulled his mouth back to yours, already missing the taste on his tongue.

That was 5 months ago. For 5 months, you’d been Luke’s girlfriend and for all that time you’d listening to Y/F/N talk about how much she wanted him. Sometimes you’d hear her desire for him in far too much detail. It you were being entirely honest, it was annoying. She never relented, she’d laugh too loudly at his dumbass jokes, run her hand over his arm one too many times and lean too close to him when he spoke.

Tonight, the two of you were backstage at one of their shows, Y/F/N’s eyes focused on the tall boy in the centre of the stage. You hated the way she looked at him, as if all she was interested in was the way he looked. You were too deep in thought about how you were going to eventually break it to her that Luke was taken, that you didn’t notice the boys walking off the stage. Luke’s eyes only saw you as he ran over, wrapping his arms around your waist, lifting you up until your lips met his. For a few seconds, all your mind was filled with was Luke’s arms holding you close to him, his soft, familiar lips against your own. Then reality hit.

“Fuck” you mutter against his mouth. Turning to Y/F/N, you see her horrified expression, “I-I can explain this..” You begin.

hi lovely people, i recently just hit 5,000 followers! thank you to everyone that has welcomed me into this fandom making me feel like family. i love all of you guys very much :) thank you for always making my dash fun to scroll through, even if sometimes they make me cry or laugh to my death. so in honor of this huge milestone, here are some blogs i will follow forever:

[a-d] acciotronnor, amazingphilbeccaluvlev, brbtronnor, carelesshowell, coffee-and-nutella, conconsivan, connieandtroye, conniefrannie, conniesivannie, connorstroyeblemaker, danyelest, danisnotonfire, dearestsivan

[f-l] flannelsandsweaters, freakingcrazyforconnor, hashtagtrxye, hellaobsessedtronnor, hellatronnor, honey-chuckles, httptronnie, icherishtronnor, iconictronnor, idyllicphan, ilysbtronnor, ironicallytronnor, itmetroye, itstronnor, lookingfortronler

[m-r] musicaltroye, oktronnor, quiffless, ripsticktroye

[t-w] tactiletronnor, talkmedowntronnor, theconnorfranta, tokyotronnor, tracking-tronnor, triusivan, tromellet, tronn-da-bon, tronniefrantamellet, tronnor-vevo, tronnorcuddles, tronnorfravan, tronnorific, tronnorilysb, tronnorvideos, troyeble, troyeboyish, troyes-avocado, troyes-passion, troyescoolshit, troyesfranta, wanderlusttronnor, whoistroyeanyway

and to the last 2, but definitely not the least,

connorfranta - thank you for always reblogging posts onto my dash that are soo my aesthetic. thank you for always being you and being amazing. you are doing so many great things and accomplishing so many things. i love you with all my heart. <3

troyesivan - thank you for always reblogging posts onto my dash that make me lose my shit and just laugh endlessly. thank you for being so great. i cannot wait for the future, as i’ll be right there by your side watching you live your dream. i love you with all my heart <3

*those in bold are the people i love and admire so much*

thank you so much again!! :) - isabella

wooo my end of year follow forever is here guys

also thank you to live-laugh-headbang for making the banner and its super cute so thank you

i will bold my favourites that i follow and i love you all and you all make my dashboard great and amazing 


5sostexting 5sos-writing 5sostfln 5sosstyleguide 5soswhatthehell 5secondsofkennedy 5-seconds-of-sydney 5secondsofhappinessposts 5sos-dreaming 5secondsofchocolatemilkparty 5sosnsfw 5sos-are-punk 182s 5secum 5sos-unoffical 5sos-at-heart 5-directions-of-calm


  acidcxlum adorkablemuke adoresnialler blink18muke blurberrys cutelucas chesirehazzuh cashtonhemmford calumhemmings calumthomashood bumkneesociety cumformeclifford cobaincal cliiffconda connorfranta clifford-the-big-red-guitarist damagefanfic danielsflint didhendallreallyhappen dicknozzle daddyyliam ellehemmings educashton clumhood ashtonsdimps assholuke ashternoon


live-laugh-headbang ifyoudcntknow lostboyep irwinsobs irwincasualty irwindaisy iwantlukesdick irwinssneakers hoodlessclifford hoodswifi hoodlelujah hemmingsofficial laughmichael laushton


mashtoncliffin punkflop punkerror michaelcliffsides michaelgordoncliffordofficial michaelgsource psychedeliclifford midnight-clifford mikeyshemmo mikeys-cliffoconda overstimulashton pinkymikey starstruckirwin mali-koa-hood ohemmoh muketv stonedcashton misfithood stfu-hemmings


weightlessmike teenagedirtbxnds texting-5sos yascuteboys turndownformikey voodoodollus vodkaclifford txhohood 

plus i would not be here without 5sos-official so thank you very much i love you all and i would like to suck your dicks

plus these aren’t all of the people i am following cause there are a lot but i love you all and it would take me ages to do it all

Tumblr user mldr made me listen to the 1977 interview with the sassholes and I have some observations:

- they’re all literally their characters I’m crying
- at least Mark is there to reign him in. Sort of. He tried once.
- Mark Hamill is a cinnamon roll, too good, too pure for this world
- “Harrison if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all” honestly I’m done
- mldr bless you for sending me this
- Carrie say something you’re uncharacteristically quiet it’s unnerving

Hey everyone!

So before we see today’s new episode and probably get our hearts ripped from our chests, let’s remember that Steven Universe can make us smile and in my case, giggle like I’m a moronic 5yr old.

I’m just glad there is a show like this for kids.
With the character diversity, to it’s lessons about love and loss, I love this show so very much.

Plus; it’s hilariously random for no reason at all. Lion is F**king ADORABLE!
Frybo was the stuff of my nightmares.
And Onion will forever be the hidden treasure.

So let’s all get ready to be destroyed because I’m pretty sure that these animators live off our collective tears.