i love you england i do but you know

Mate, what is with your sausages?! They’re not sausages, they’re circular burgers! Everywhere I go, like every time like you go to IHOP or something like that, it’s just like, you ask for sausages and you get a burger and you’re like… what? I think you, like Americans can do some… like cheeseburgers over here? A+. Pizzas over here? A+. Breakfast? SUCKS. Sucks. But actually, do you know what? You do pudding for breakfast quite well. You know when you have like, um, like a stack of pancakes with like cream on it and like strawberries? See, we’d have that for pudding. We’d have dinner in England and then eat that as dessert. You guys have it for breakfast. I love it. Dessert for breakfast [interrupting] sorry, dessert for breakfast is the way forward, I think. Do you know what? If you could do cheesecake for breakfast here, I’d definitely do that. Yeah! Or um, profiteroles! Do you have profiteroles here? Imagine that for breakfast. That and cheesecake for breakfast. I’d move here if that… yeah. Actually, no, you do salmon and cream cheese bagels quite well as well… I’ve really… we’ve gone off topic here, haven’t we?
—  Ed Sheeran gets distracted by American food and begins grading it, February 15, 2017. 
Creepypasta #1050: I Am A Truck Driver, And I Wish I'd Never Seen What I Saw On The Side Of The Road

Length: Medium

As a trucker, I travel a lot, traveling to places I wish I hadn’t been. I have seen and experienced things I wish I had not. But it is these things that make me who I am, and that is why I love the job. You never know what you’ll run into next. However, not knowing also means that you cannot plan ahead, like how you’ll react in certain situations. I do not make the right choices in certain situations. At all.

I was in the UK a while back, taking a load up to the north of England. It was dark with few stars in the sky. I couldn’t quite focus on the road for some reason, and kept fiddling with the radio. A few minutes passed of me doing this. I looked up, and caught it right in my headlights. Sprawled out on the ground was a body. It wasn’t moving. I pulled the truck into the side and climbed out.

As I approached the body slowly, I cautiously asked “Are you ok, sir?”. No reply. 

I walked over, about to take his pulse, when I realised that there was no need. Blood was oozing out from underneath him - an obvious stab wound. It was clear to see the man was dead, and I knew that I had to call the police. I dialled 999 and explained to them what I had found. They said that they would send someone out to me, and to stay put. 

A few moments later, I heard voices shouting, and the sound of footsteps - fast footsteps - hitting the floor hard. I could make out the silhouettes of two men, one carrying a bag, I knew exactly what that was for.

I sprinted back to my truck and clambered in, heart pounding. How could this be happening to me? That was the question thumping inside my head. The men had made it to the body now. One chucked the dead body into the bag before running for their car. I hadn’t seen them parked on the other side of the road. 

The second man ran over to my truck and started climbing up. I opened the door powerfully on his face. He cried out in agony and fell backwards. I did the only thing I could think to do. Drive.

I slammed my foot on the accelerator and got out of there as quickly as I could, relieved that I had got away in time. The relief didn’t last long, as I noticed headlights behind me. I was being chased down, and of course, he was much faster than me. The car behind me was gradually gaining. I knew I couldn’t out run him, but I sure could outsize him. I waited until he was right on my tail and then crushed the brake. I was flung forward in my seat.

By the time I had recovered, he was gone. I did not know where, or how I hadn’t hit him. I saw a turning a few yards to the left and could only assume he had taken that. I put my foot down once again, I wanted to make sure that the other man did not catch up.

I had been speeding along for a good five minutes when I noticed something in the middle of the road ahead. It was two cars. Two cars that I recognised. It was the men. They had formed some kind of road block. A thousand thoughts were spinning around in my head - had I really stumbled across something that serious that these people needed me dead? Why would they not just attempt to get away? What do I do now? Earlier I talked about how in certain situations I make the wrong choices. Now was one of these times. I ploughed straight through the block and didn’t stop.

The cops arrived at the scene and questioned me on what happened and how two cars ended up lying wrecked in the middle of the road. I told them what I had done. One man had been hospitalised and the other had escaped on foot. Detectives found fresh tyre marks nearby and deduced that the man had got away by car. It turned out that the men were gang leaders. The two of them had killed the man I found on the side of the road, who was also identified as the leader of another gang.

I still curse myself that the other man got away. For some reason I can never shake of the feeling that somehow, I’ll see him again.

Credits to: JoeFish2018

Canada *Picks up the phone*: Allo?

America: Bro!! I just read the most distressing zodiac post!!!

Canada: Oh boy.

America: It said that my zodiac sign, you know, cancer, wouldn’t get along with England’s, like, we wouldn’t be friends. But Matthew-

Canada: Mmmhhmm?

America: We are friends. And- and then do you know what it said?!

Canada: The suspense is killing me.

America: That Russia and I would get along- like really get along. But I do not get along with Russia. What if, though, I’m wrong about us?

Canada: You need to take these things a lot less seriously.

America: At least we’ll always have the same sign, bro, I don’t know if I could-

Canada: I’m hanging up now. 

animeloverluna35  asked:

OK! so first off i love and I mean LOVE YOUR DRAWINGS! Your style and all. Also I LOVE THAT UR DOING FRUK MY FAV SHIP! I am their daughter in roleplay actually! Anyway I know you said no smut or anything inappropriate but could you make England and France kiss and one of them really really like at the edge of fainting for something! plz i would love it soo much! Thank You!

strawberrycat101  asked:

How would the 2ps react to finding out their crush worked in a maid cafe?

2P!America: *cHOKES* whoa whoa whoa, back the fuck up, what did ya just say??? ….aHAHA, babe I bet you look hella fine ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

2P!China: *nosebleeds* Did you just say… m-maid cafe… *bLUSHES* yOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I NEED TO SEE THIS

2P!England: Awwwh dearie I bet you look absolutely precious in a maid dress! ♥ How are the clients? Do they treat a lovely lady like yourself with the type of respect that you deserve??

2P!France: oh, sounds hot.

2P!Russia: *grimaces* What type of cafe is that? It sounds ridiculous.

2P!Italy: *chuckles lowly* didn’t know you were into that kind of thing.

2P!Germany: No way, what’s that? *after being told* hOLY SHIT IT SOUNDS LIKE FUCKIN’ PARADISE

2P!Japan: *scowls* I never would have suspected that of you…

2P!Canada: uh, i don’t think i like the way that sounds?

2P!Romano: You’re telling me you get paid to??? Dress up as a maid?? And serve people????? and yOU CALL THEM ‘MASTER’ EXCUSE ME WHERE DO I SIGN UP FOR THIS SHIT

2P!Austria: Ooh, is that so? Perhaps I’ll drop in for a visit one of these days~

2P!Prussia: Ah… that sounds a little scary… Do you like it? I-I mean… I bet you lookadorabledressedasamaid … .⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄-⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄

  • England: Bloody hell, where is he? The meeting is going to start in five minutes.
  • Canada: Papa said he was on his way.
  • England: I know, but when will he actually show up.
  • Canada: Hold on... I got this.
  • England: ...what do you mea–
  • Canada: Do you hear the people sing?
  • *heavy stomping*
  • England: Wha–
  • *door slams open*
  • France: sINGING THE SONGS OF ANGRY MEN

Hi my name is amy, I’m 19 (almost 20) from England!

Don’t mind you you are or where your from I want to get some more pen pals who will want to do some snail mail 🐌

Likes - cats, books, Netflix, cats, anime, manga, sleep, animals, art and more cats (incase got were wondering I LOVE CATS)

Dislikes - discrimination in any form, early mornings (unless it’s to take pics of the sunrise), anything mean to animals or people! I don’t like Chewing gum lol

Message your interested and want to get to know each other a bit more =^.^= @theodoresherlockmeows

Inner thoughts on developing a crush
  • 2P!America: tiME TO GET MY SHIT TOGETHER WOOOOOOO
  • 2P!China: i LoVE yOU ANd I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I LOVE YOUUU
  • 2P!England: pls no what is happening
  • 2P!France: fUCK. NO. FUCK. FUCKFUCKFUCK.
  • 2P!Russia: ....rlly
  • 2P!Italy: hurry up and date me alreadyyy
  • 2P!Germany: hERE WE GO AGAIN
  • 2P!Japan: emotions what emotions
  • 2P!Canada: shit nOW WHAT HMM
  • 2P!Romano: MiNe MINE MINE MINE MINE
  • 2P!Austria: i shall protect you from everyone else k
  • 2P!Prussia: wow okay oh gosh whAT DO I DO

seekadventures  asked:

Hey! I"m looking for new friends to wait in line for Saturday Night Live tickets Friday night - for Harry. I'm 23 and from Vancouver - in nyc for the week. I saw On the Road Again 8 times and made great friends in England. Hoping I can in NYC this time too! Do you know anyone looking for a neat new friend - or can you broadcast this at all? It would be a way more fun experience to share. Sorry to bug you I've this isn't you're thing at all. Thanks!<3 Rachel

Here you go love

Something To Ask

Request from @lesliekate0502 “Can you do a Sirius x Reader with the quote : ’ When I saw you I fell in love and you smiled because you knew’ by Shakespeare, please? 

Thanks for the request! I know its a bit short, but I hope you like it


You had moved from Germany to England over the summer and had to be transferred wizarding schools. You were going into fifth year at Hogwarts and were filled with excitement and anxiety.

You boarded the Hogwarts Express on September first with your school things packed and your confidence peaking. You made two friends that day, Lily Evans and Marlene Mckinnon.

While you were on the train, a pair of boys came into the compartment. Upon seeing them, Lily rolled her eyes and groaned.

“Good morning, Evans! Go out with me?” One of them said. He had messy black hair and glasses, while the other one, particularly handsome, had long black hair and a mischievous smirk.

You looked at him up and down. When you reached his face, you could tell he had done the same to you. He was staring, observing your features like it was a famous painting or something of the sort.

You smirked at this, especially when he opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. He blushed a little bit and raked his fingers through his hair.

“No, Potter. Stop asking.” Lily shook her head.

“Who’s this?” The other boy asked, gesturing to you.

“I’m (Y/N). I transferred from across the channel.” YOu answered.

“Welcome to Great Britain then, (Y?N), I’m Sirius Black, and this is James Potter. I’d love to stay and chat, but I’d better get James back to our compartment before Evans here clocks him in the jaw for ogling at her.” The boy introduced himself. And the pair left.

“He’s charming.” You smiled to yourself.


“Now that you all are back from break, we will be learning more difficult charms…” Professor Flitwick drawled on.

“It’s only the first day back,” You complained to Lily, “we should have an easy day.”

“I second that.” Sirius whispered from beside you.

You had, almost mistakenly befriended the marauders, and dragged Lily along with you in the process. It was a good mistake, you all had the best times together, even if it had only been one semester. However, another mistake was made.

You had fallen for the one and only, Sirius Black. Of course, he was too busy pranking teachers and students, terrorizing Snape with James ad snogging other girls to notice. He did flirt with me, and you flirted back, just fun, nothing else, not for him at least.

“D’you think he’ll notice if we snuck out of class?” Sirius whispered.

“Yes. You’re not that sly.” You told him.

“I bet you could get us out of here.”

“But I wouldn’t because we would get in trouble.”

“Please? I’ll give you a kiss.” He teased.

You blushed bright scarlet.

“As much as I’d love that, still not worth it.” I smiled.

You  went back to listening, the three of you occasionally passing notes.

Later that night after dinner and all of uour classes, you and your friends sat around in the common room talking. Eventually, people started going off to bed, leaving James, Sirius and you alone.

You were busy reading, but looked up every once in a while when you heard shuffling or whispers from James and Sirius’ direction. James was always nudging Sirius and looking over at you. Sirius would shake his head and say something quietly.

After a few minutes of this, James stood up and announced he was going to bed.

“Also, (Y/N), Sirius has a question.”

Sirius kicked James as he left and you put down your book.

“Well, that was awfully boyish.” You chuckled.

“It was, wasn’t it.” Sirius rolled his eyes.

“Well then, have anything to ask?” You said.

“He was being a prick, I don’t have anything to ask.” Sirius looked down.

“You know, I’m normally clueless, but I’d say you’re nervous, or embarrassed.” You teased.

“Well, yeah. Its cause the girl I’ve been in love with since September is sitting in the firelight and looks absolutely stunning.” He shrugged.

You froze.

“Yep. I said I didn’t have anything to ask, but I did have something to say, I guess.”

“Sirius…” You searched for words but your mind was blank. You remembered the day you met. How you knew he was staring at you because he saw something different. You knew you intrigued him at the least. Lily and Marlene teased you about it after they left the train compartment, but you thought nothing of it after a while.

“You see, I’ve built my own reputation, you know it. I snog girls in the halls and move around a lot. But I never had a reason to. This year I’ve done it to distract myself from you, but it leaves me more empty than ever. When I saw you, I fell in love with you, and you smiled, because you knew.”

By the time he had finished saying this, he moved to sit with you. You turned to face him and your faces were so close you could feel his breath. But you couldn’t look at him  in the eyes.

“Well,” You managed to breathe out, “Its a good thing I fancy you too.”

You closed the small gap in between the two of you and your lips touched. There was a spark and you closed your eyes, leaning into the kiss.

You pulled apart and laughed in relief.

“I guess, I did have something to ask,” Sirius said, “will you be my girlfriend?”

ABC Tag

rules: answer the questions and tag

tagged by @c9gun

a - age: 19 
b - biggest fear: Spiders and heights
c - current time: 10:40pm 
d - drink you last had: Coffee 
f - favorite song: I have a few, I’ll go for like 3 ~ Good Riddence - Green Day, House of Gold - TØP & Reckless - You Me At Six
g - ghosts, are they real: I hope so, they sound cool af
h- hometown: Morecambe, England 
i - in love with: Nah, I wish (Meteos tho) 
j - jealous of: People who know what they want to do in life, I guess 
k - killed someone: … No? … 
l - last time you cried: Last week ;-;
m - middle name: Don’t have one, I have two first names though
n - number of siblings: 2 (Older brothers, yuck)
o - one wish: idk, be an LCS pro?
p - person you last called/texted: My dad ~_~ 
q - question(s) you’re always asked?: Are you and [Best friend] together, as in romantically? 
r - reasons to smile: I get to study something I love ❤ 
s - song last played: Give - You Me At Six 
t - time you woke up: 8:10 - I had 20 minutes to get ready ;~; 
u - underwear color: Black 
v - vacation destination: South Korea or America probably 
w - worst habit: Stress eating _~_ 
x - x-rays you’ve had: None :) 
y - your favorite food: Pizza 
z - zodiac sign: Aquarius


I tag @lcscuties @league-of-brodies & I’ll tag @nekomieze too (haven’t had time to check if you guys have already done it 😅)

A regular 2P meeting

2p!America: Hay Luci!

2p!Italy: What did you just-

2p!Romano: Calm down fratello, he didn’t-

2p!Italy: HE JUST CALLED MY BY A NICKNAME AND YOU KNOW THAT I HATE TO THAT, YOU SON OF A BITCH!

2p!England: Your language! Swear jar, now!

2p!Canada: Chill dudes.

2p!America: Luci, Luci, Luci, I don’t hear you!

2p!Italy: FUCK OF!!!

2p!England: SWEAR JAR!!!

2p!Russia: *is trying to have a proper meeting*

2p!Austria: Gilly, talk to me!

2p!Prussia: Why do you want that so badly…

2p!Austria: I love you~

2p!Prussia: 0////////0

2p!Russia: Everyone, calm down-

2p!China: Fuck off, no one cares!

2p!Japan: what did you say?

2p!China: Don’t talk when you don’t have to, trash!

2p!Japan: Me? Trash? Someone is going to die after the meeting…

2p!France: Is it over yet?

2p!Germany: *is trying to sleep*

2p!Russia: *trying not to losse it*

2p!England: EVERYONE, SWEAR JAR!!! NOW!!!

2p!Canada: We didn’t even do a thing…


2p!America: LUCI LUCI-

2p!Italy: CALL ME LIKE THAT ONE MORE TIME-

2p!Romano: FRATELLO CALM DOWN YOU WILL DESTROY MY NEW SHIRT!!!

2p!Japan: Zao, don’t you dare to attack me!

2p!China: You’re not my mom to tell me what to do!

2p!Baltics: *doing nothig*

2p!Prussia: P-please Roland, don’t do anything…

2p!Austria: Come on, we'all have fun!

2p!Prussia: N-no… 0////////0

2p!Germany: *wakes up* What did I miss?

2p!France: Nothing outside the regular. We haven even started.

2p!England: SWEAR JAR!!!

2p!Russia: *losses it* EVERYONE SHUT UP!!!

*everyone calms down*

2p!Baltics: Damn…

2p!Russia: Let’s start with the proper meeting now.

Tagged by @houseofgriffons :)

Rules: Answer the questions in a new post and tag 20 blogs you would like to get to know better. (I’m a lazy bitch so i’ll tag a few but anyone can do it and just tag me)

A - Age:
17
B - Birthplace:
England, UK
C - Current time:
9:41
D - Drink you last had:
Diet Coke
E - Easiest person to talk to:

My best friends Luke and Sol

F - Favourite song:

(right now? all time is too hard) love you with the lights on -morgxn
G - Grossest memory:
When i was little i saw a bee and wanted to take it home with me, so i clapped (bc im stupid) to catch it. It turned out to be a wasp and it was squishy and there were tears and yeah.
H - Horror yes or horror no?
NO BOY NO
I - In love?
nope
J - Jealous?

nope
Nah
K - Killed someone?
what no
L - Love at first sight or should I walk past again:
love at first sight is silly
M - Middle name:
Susan
N - Number of siblings:
4, an older pain in the ass (a sister)
O - One wish:
Get good a-level grades
P - Person you called last:
My mum, checking to see how i was feeling (currently dying)
Q - Question you’re always asked:
How you doing?
R - Reason to smile

My dog. I love my dog.
S - Song you sang last:

Does screaming the trail from the witcher 3 count??
T - Time you woke up:
7 ish? i went back to sleep though
U - Underwear colour:
black
V - Vacation destination:
idk i’ve always wanted to go to south korea, or italy
W - Worst habit:
PROCRAstINATING
X - X-rays:
Only like once when they thought i broke my foot playing netball
Y - Your favourite food:
PARMO I LOVE PARMOS i have like 3 this week
Z - Zodiac sign:
scorpio, libra? who the fuck knows im on one of those changey days.

EVERYONE CAN DO IT i wanna know you all you sound mint

Alphabet Tag!

Okay so I was tagged twice by the lovely @mrsjugheadjonesthethird and @evalocity so I thought I’d go ahead and do the tag!

Rules: answer the question in a new post and tag 20 blogs you would like to get to know better

a - age: 21

b - birthplace: North West of England!

c - current time: 18:17

d - drink you last had: A strong and sugary coffee to wake me up so I can maybe write some more of my fics tonight like I keep promising.

e - easiest person to talk to: On Tumblr it would definitely be the lovely Sad Breakfast Club, they are an ace group of girls! In real life it would be my boyfriend, I literally tell him everything and anything and I can always be super weird and tell him the stupidest jokes and he loves it cause he loves me cause I’m a god damn treasure. 

f - favorite song: Right now thanks to @burgers-and-murders for using it on one of her playlists I keep listening to Talk Through The Night by D.I.D. But my absolute favourite song in the entire world is Unchained Melody by The Righteous Brothers (I’m soppy I know)

g - grossest memory: I suppose when I was literally a walking/running advertisement for why you shouldn’t run with scissors and I accidentally stabbed myself in the hand as I tripped over. 

h - horror yes or horror no: Yes definitely! Back when I was younger it was literally my favourite genre of film, as I’ve gotten older I just feel like modern horror films aren’t living up to their potential. I mean I have to admit the horror genre can be quite limiting in what new story-lines there can be which is why we see a lot of remakes these days but I really love 80′s/90′s horror. 

i - in love?: Yes I am quite smitten.

j - jealous of people?: I get jealous where my boyfriend is concerned a little but only because I love him so much. I don’t get jealous of other peoples success though, I’m all for people achieving their dreams and being the best versions of themselves!

k - killed someone?: ...No.

l - love at first sight or should I walk by again: I think love has to stem from friendship and humour. Love at first joke maybe?

m - middle name: Louise (So basic)

n - number of siblings: 0

o - one wish: For my dreams of being either a YA novelist to come true or to really pursue my dreams of working on the production of a show! (fingers crossed)

p - person you called last: I rang back a big UK game show studio who were asking about my application that I submitted last month…

q - question you’re always asked: How do you spell that? (In regards to my last name)

r - reason to smile: Dogs, puppers, woof woofs.

s - song you sang last: Million Reasons by Lady Gaga

t - time you woke up: This morning I got up at 7:30!

u - underwear color: Turquoise!

v - vacation destination: I would love to go to Hawaii!

w - worst habit: Letting my room get messy.

x - x-rays: I’ve had too many to actually tell you, although I’ve never broken anything I was just a rather clumsy child/teenager/person in general.

y - your favorite food: Pad Thai Chicken everyday! 

z - zodiac sign: Scorpio!


Okay so the people I’m going to tag I’m like pretty sure will have already been tagged in this or maybe already done it but oh well! @burgers-and-murders @pendletonthethird @jugheadjns @mrs-jughead-jones @ju-gg @onceuponagladerhead

Pen pal/internet friend:)

Hello!
I’m loey I’m from New England and speak English and french. I love horror movies and anything that has to do with that type of stuff, cats, musicals, acting, and reading is mostly everything you need to know about me. I’m looking for a friend between the ages of 13-17 who is willing to talk about anything, and from anywhere in the world.
You can find me on here @hella-hamilton and snapchat hella-hamilton

Under Appreciated Lines in Hetalia: Paint It, White!

Iceland: “Oh skit… what the cripes!


France: "Everybody knows I’ve got the biggest-”

England: “-nobody asked you, cheesy monkey!”


England: “…You feel like a horse’s ass!”


China: “Suck ball! I knew fortune cookie this morning was full of bad luck!”


Poland: “Why are you look at me like that with the no eyes?”


Switzlerand: [Permanant Neutrality Border]


Japan: “No likey” (said like ‘rikey’)


Tony: “Because I don’t do dubs!”


Japan: “Germany! I’m sorry; I touched you. But if we fight sporadically we will only end up defeated”

Germany: “Must kill!”


England: “Double-O-Ninja!”


Narrator: “Britain. A former pirate, but now a rather effeminate, yet gentlemanly empire with a plethora of rain. France is a longtime acquaintance he’s often found bickering with for bickering’s sake. However, in their heart of hearts, they love each other. Sexually”


America: “…When humans think the word hospitality, they all think about me because I know how to have a good time!”


Germany: There is no crying in alien warfare!


America: “I’m happy to see you, hands! We’re going to have so much fun!”