i love when people do this okay

Mama Thoughts

Another incredible episode from Andi Mack.

Let’s start with the smallest plot points, but they are really significant in terms of representation.

Andi teaches Bex how to solve a Rubix cube. I knew a lot of people obsessed with Rubix cubes when I was Andi’s age, and they were all boys. I LOVE how they are subtly doing something feminist without hitting us over the head. Andi likes Rubix cubes, and she’s good at them.

The second major point was that Ham is doing hot yoga. He’s, as far as we know, a straight man, who isn’t thin as a stick, and he’s doing hot yoga. It’s small but it’s another little thing that threw gender expectations completely out the window. I hope they keep doing this. It’s so important.

Okay, so as a Jewish girl, I almost cried seeing Cyrus practicing for his bar mitzvah. Even in Lizzie McGuire, Gordo’s Jewishness wasn’t really part of his everyday character, but with Cyrus it is. He’s not just having a bar mitzvah which comes seemingly out of nowhere. He’s practicing his Hebrew and trope and all this stuff that I went through. I hope he has to write his drash in one episode and we get to see that process, which, is absolute hell, by the way.

Jonah’s reaction is, well…okay, first off, was Jonah on his way to somewhere important? Did he literally drop what he was doing just because Cyrus called his name? And then he asks about Hebrew, and even though Cyrus says he’s not actually interested, I think he was actually interested.

It’s funny, Asher is Jewish too, or, at least, his name is. So it’s funny seeing two Jewish boys playing characters of different religions when Asher probably knows exactly what Cyrus was doing.

Anyways, Cyrus said something that got me thinking “you don’t want to see me when I really put myself down…it’s dark” He’s 12. But dark can still be DARK. He said it with a smile, but I’m not sure it was an exaggeration. I wonder if Cyrus is going to be chronically depressed or something, but there is more to that story, a lot more. Would Disney ever do a self-harm storyline?

When Jonah is teaching Cyrus to skateboard you can totally see and feel the love he has for Cyrus. He cares about him so much, but I think the more important part of the skateboard scene is the fact that Jonah made a big mistake. He didn’t teach Cyrus how to do anything but stand on the skateboard. Everything Andi Mack does is deliberate, especially when it comes to Jonah and Cyrus. What Jonah did was stupid and reckless, as he says later, he forgets that Cyrus is helpless, but I’ll get there later. I think this goes to Jonah’s character. he always means well, but he doesn’t think before he does something. I think this characterization is going to come up again and again and probably result in him doing something irreversible at some point.

The hospital scene was super telling on all fronts. We watch as Buffy realizes that the crush IS reciprocated. It’s not possible for someone not to see how helpless Cyrus is unless they are just blind to his bad qualities. That’s the definition of a new crush. And how anxious and scared Jonah was, I mean, Asher’s acting was on point, and Jonah was close to tears before the girls got there. I also think we learned more about Cyrus’ parents in this episode. He’s sheltered, like, REALLY sheltered. I kind of wonder if his parents are modern orthodox or something, now, THAT’S something that has never been done on TV and I’d really love to see.

Moving on, Buffy. SHE’S LEARNING! Friends come before competition. I wonder how this is going to play into future episodes. And how it’s going to play into her relationship with Marty. I also think there was an underlying part of this plot that had to do with respect for the elders. The first part, where she’s listing things that she could put Millie down for, that’s a very real reality for many elderly, and it was a little reminder that just because someone is old does not mean they are helpless. I wonder if it was a technique to get kids to spend more time with their grandparents, and how many of the kids watching, did call their grandparents and have a short chat or something after watching this.

Andi plays mom in this episode, and I thought that was really interesting. Cece and Bex spend the episode arguing, and then finally making up, but Andi is the mediator, along with Ham. When Ham comes into the room excited about the day, it’s him and Andi against Cece and Bex. I thought that was really clever, and it’s clear that’s what was happening because one of the “previously on Andi Mack” was Andi screaming at Cece and Bex “I’m the kid, here!” So that flip was cool to see.

I also think it goes to Andi’s character that she thinks it’s her fault that Bex left. She was not even a year old and she’s blaming herself for her first words. It’s clear she’s spiraling in some small way, and, I mean, who the hell can blame her? Her entire life was turned upside down less than six months prior. I wonder how far they are going to go with this, what her breaking point is going to be.

The house…that’s a bomb to drop. I really loved watching Bex’s reaction how at first she was angry, but then she realized that it was Cece’s way of saying that she believes in her to be a good mom.

I’m really curious to see how Bex actually breaks the news. I believe in her to do this right.

anonymous asked:

Hi I see your Early GOC!Clef and squad living out of a van and raise you "now Clef knows how to prepare some sort of meal out of any ingredients in any conditions and when asked about how he mad something edible out of three (3) items shoplifted from a gas station and over a tiny ass smoky fire out of sticks in the rain says nothing but "operatives gotta eat :^/"" (sorry to bother you okay bye)

i love GOC!clef who has slept around trash fires and knows how to live with sixty eight (68) cents in ur bank account and basically was homeless on and off while working for the GOC bc they didn’t care, didn’t help you, you killed people so you could have money to eat, that sort of thing. if you didn’t have luck hunting, you didn’t get paid. when he got promoted to special operative command would sometimes have him ditch them for a couple months to do a few solo missions, and if they didn’t work out and he was like, left alone in a town living under a highway waiting for the next call on his flip phone to sneak onto a bus somewhere else. soup kitchens dont ask why your mittens are soaked with blood and you have an actual gun with no ammo strapped to you.

eventually the GOC started having more infrastructure and was able to pay them a wage. like, it was waaaayyyy below minimum, but it could get you out of a scrape. nowadays they have the same kind of facilities and stuff that the Foundation has; the people doing his old job in 2017 have backup, get recalled from the field to a reliable safehouse with food and water to sleep, get medication and medical care, that kind of thing. 

on the other hand hes like, perpetually thankful for food and shelter and stuff now, like, when he was living like that he didn’t ever think that he’d be able to own an apartment and have a salary and even live to be 25, forget the age he’s at now.

when i was younger the way i felt about girls kissing was different. it made me uncomfortable, like i knew i shouldn’t hear my own heart skip. i remember watching boys kiss girls on tv and teaching myself “this is all i have”. i’m 24 and i still feel guilty when i think about how much i like girls. i hid it and hated it and i’m not even out to half of my friends. i couldn’t figure out why i felt certain things. i wrecked myself over it, made it hard for me to be in longterm relationships, made it hard to love without feeling like i’m doing the wrong thing.

but yesterday i was teaching a group of second graders. 

“i think i want a girlfriend,” she said to me. when a boy squawked “a girlfriend!” the other kids stood up for her instantly. “it’s normal!” “it’s okay if some people want different things.” “yeah, not everybody needs to like boys.” 

the boy shook his head and stared at me. “i don’t care it’s a girl” he said, with his hands in the air, “but we don’t even pay taxes, how is she thinking of getting married?”

“miss raquel,” she asked, “why does it look like you’re crying?”

6

“Feindesliebe” (ger.) - loving your enemies

“They sent me to kill you. And I tried… I really tried.

But I couldn’t do it.

Because he loved you.

And when I look at you like that, I know the reason

why he did.”

Okay, so today I finished watching s3…. And hooooly shit. I totally understand why a lot of people think the “new” Shiro might be a clone.There’s definitely something wrong with him. Not sure if he’s really a clone or they just put something into is brain, though. But something’s fucky.

So here’s some clone!Shiro (or Kuron?) stuff I made after watching the last episode. Because… what if the real Shiro is still out there and the Galra sent their “Project Kuron” to infiltrate the castle and kill the Paladins one by one?

But since Kuron seems to have acess to all of Shiro’s memories and emotions, he falls for Keith instead of killing him. And he falls hard.

Keith in return knows exactly that this isn’t his Shiro… It’s just small things, like the way Kuron looks at him or touches him with his Galra-tech arm, without noticing. It’s the way Kuron lets himself fall for Keith in a way Shiro would’ve never allowed himself to.

So… what if Keith falls for the clone instead of the original?


(btw, I’ll still stick to my smol bean Kuro and the headcanons I made for him… Kuron is just…another Shirogane? :) Like Shiro, Kuro, AND Ryou aren’t enough already. One can never have enough Shiroganes.)

Things the Types Need to Hear

ESFP: Look, I get it, you leave people in the dust because you know how crazy and all over the place your life can be and you’re also crazy scared to let somebody in just to have it end up with you accidentally leaving them and both of you getting hurt, but emotional intimacy and real depth in friendships are 100% worth it in the end and it’s the struggle and fight of a lifetime to keep them in your life, but it’s also the greatest gift and you can’t keep denying yourself that intimacy and friendship. 

ISFP: I know you have a lot of great desires and wonderful dreams and they might seem too far off and too crazy and too beautiful to come true, but you have them for a reason, and you gotta stop paralyzing yourself with fear and take that first step and throw yourself into the unknown, and that’s the scariest part, I know, but we both know you’re braver than you look, and that your passion can make it happen. 

ENFP: I know that the moment you hit an obstacle or two when you first start working towards that far off dream, it’s scary and it makes you want to crumble and run away to a new thing like you think you always do, but don’t! You’re miles more tenacious and capable than you give yourself credit for and you’ve got to discipline yourself and trust that your talents and optimism can and will propel you through whatever is keeping you from your goals. 

INFP: I know it’s hard to feel understood and it’s easy to let yourself become bitter by the ways of the world or whatever’s happening, but closing yourself off to others isn’t going to save you the pain. You have a natural capacity to understand others that’s hard for the other types to grasp and when you stop yourself from using that talent, or use it for selfish reasons, you’re doing yourself a massive injustice. 

ESTP: Listen, I totally get that the world is full of fun and interesting things and you want to experience them all, but you’ve got to remember that for a lot of the people that come along with you, they’re there to experience YOU as much as they’re there for the thing itself. Don’t let yourself forget that half the fun of anything is who you’re doing it with. 

ISTP: I know you generally don’t mean to yell or be rude when your irritated and that it’s really just a passing thing and you don’t generally care all that much, but just apologize to people after you’ve calmed down! Explain it to them and that you don’t mean it! Admit to yourself that you care enough about them to try to make amends, even when you’re just being a little crotchety; it means a lot to the feelers lol. 

ENTP: You’re a genuinely fun person to be around and you usually rack up a reputation for that, but just because you’re funny and witty and damn smart doesn’t mean you don’t have feelings and problems that need to be externalized, and trust me, the right people will be more than willing to talk about what’s really happening in your life one minute and go back to elaborate jokes the next without a problem. Don’t stunt your emotional growth for the sake of brevity. 

INTP: It’s okay to not know what to do in an emotional situation. Like, it’s genuinely okay. If somebody’s opening up to you, half the time your presence and you listening is 95% of what they need in that moment. Don’t avoid the situations just because it causes writer’s block emotionally. Emotional availability comes with experience. You’ll learn. Just, be your goofy self and the rest will come with time. 

ENFJ: You’ve got to realize that although holding yourself to such a high standard is noble and praiseworthy, that it sometimes eclipses your ability to be a good friend when that was the goal in the first place. You’re human and can’t do everything for your friends that you’d want to be able to do when they need help, and profusely apologizing and beating yourself up for it just shifts the focus off of helping your friend and turns it to you. Accept your humanity, and just do what you can. They appreciate the help, I promise. 

INFJ: I know you have a tendency to feel misunderstood and want people to show you that they love you and care about you, but you don’t get to say you’re fine AND disappear on people. Either say you’re not okay and pull back, or say you’re okay and stick around long enough for somebody to see through the BS. In my experience, y'all have a habit of making things a self-fulfilling prophecy, and that doesn’t do you any good! Be forward, be honest, and just be vulnerable; they care more than you convince yourself they do. 

ESFJ: I need to be straight with y'all. Learn how to talk about something other than your 4-5 current fixations. In my experience, N’s have a crazy hard time being close with you because you keep bringing the topic back to one of your current Favorite Things™, whether it be the semester abroad you just got back from or the first date that’s scheduled for two weeks from now. Expand your area of interest and you’ll find people will be much more authentic with you. 

ISFJ: You have this really amazing ability to notice the small things about people and that helps you show them you care about them in these really great and meaningful ways, but you can’t let yourself overthink the small things you notice about people. One of my good ISFJ friends started poking around trying to see if alcoholism ran in my family after noticing I’d been drinking wine a lot recently. You might have an intention to help, but overthinking/overanalyzing like that and trying to involve yourself in helping can hurt your friendships. 

ESTJ: Your presence is powerful and intense and that’s great at times, but you’ve got to let out your goofy fun side more, and hoe we’ve all seen it before, you’re a damn riot after a beer or two. People, in general, care more about fun than having every plan go right during the night/event. Be willing to be fun more, you’re so good at it. 

ISTJ: I know you get frustrated with yourself because you want to do new things and get out there and be a fun person, but the thing is, you’re so much better at being a responsible, caring person. Befriend the chaotic, crazy, lovable rascals and let them bring the fun to you (or more often than not, drag you kicking and screaming to where the fun is). 

ENTJ: Look, I’m an INTJ, so I know how hard this is to swallow, but showing you care about a person sometimes isn’t so much giving them solutions to their problems or trying to correct an issue; a lot of the other types literally just want you to listen and hear them out. And you gotta do that sometimes, babe. And shut your damn mouth while they’re telling you everything, okay? Just. Let them finish. 

INTJ: For the love of all that is holy, just cry already. Cry alone if you have to, or better yet, just go to the person you’d literally murder a thousand people for and freakin’ cry about all the crap you’ve been bottling up for the past two months and accept that you can have razor-sharp rationale and be a damn human at the same time. And just admit that you’re insecure about your relationship with that person because you care about them so much and you’re not the best at trusting people.

shitty advice of a college student. (part two)

(read part one here.)

  • sit where you’ll pay attention. sometimes this doesn’t necessarily mean sitting in the very front; personally, I like to sit more in the middle. it gives me a good view of my professor and at the same time makes me feel a lot less self-conscious.
  • not sure about shit? talk to your professor. email your professor. clarify things and show that you’re a student who cares about more than just showing up.
  • get to class on time!!!
  • when you email professors always say THANK YOU for their time and help! remember that they’re not required to put in extra time to help you; but the good ones just do. make these people love you!!! a good relationship could turn your B+ into an A- at the end of the semester.
  • reaching out to both your classmates and your professor when you’re absent is your responsibility.
  • please eat. and drink water. everyday. I mean it.
  • being a good student means that you will have shitty days. a lot of them. sometimes things go wrong, or you have more work than you can handle, or you end up getting a C on a quiz you thought you studied your ass off for. that’s okay. life happens. shit happens. let yourself feel shitty sometimes.
  • once again: let yourself feel shitty sometimes.
  • unless you want to die, don’t cram for your exams!! plan ahead. study a little bit every day so that the information is retained and you don’t have to study as much the night before. the process works. planning ahead will actually make you work lesstrust me.
  • know that mistakes happen and life goes on. sometimes there’s just nothing you can do to change something. acknowledge that you’ve done everything you could, it was worth trying, and move on. mistakes happen so we can learn from them. 
  • be realistic with your daily to-do list. if you spent all night studying your ass off for that mid-term and you know that you won’t have the mental energy to get a whole list of things done the next day, then they can wait! pace yourself and get done as much as you are capable of doing in one sitting.
  • you don’t have to look gorg going to class but if putting together daily looks and getting ur face beat gives you that motivation to go to school than you go girl!!!!
  • it does not matter if another student your age seems like they have it all together; because chances are, they don’t. no one does. we are all struggling to get shit done. we all have our own journeys. it is not a competition. no path is more valuable than another.
  • stress doesn’t mean you’re entitled to being an asshole. the people in your life probably know that you have a lot on your plate. they’re trying to live their lives as hard as you are. don’t be a dick about it.
Just Asexual Things

-Getting distracted by how pretty someone is and thinking that’s what people mean when they say “hot” or “sexy”
-Actually finding out what “sexy” means
-Humans are gorgeous but like in the way an overwhelming sunset is gorgeous.
-When I look at you I feel the same things I do when looking at a particularly awesome piece of artwork.
-“finding the right person” Oh brother.
-When people suddenly stop telling their dirty joke because they remember you’re asexual
- Like, no Chad. I wanna hear the rest of that joke. I’m asexual, not a four year old. Now take it from the top.
-That one person that keeps checking in to find out how anyone couldn’t want sex.
-That one person that keeps checking in to see how some asexuals want sex.
-Feeling like some kind of mutant
-Realizing being a mutant is pretty freaking cool
-Developing a love of purple things
-The mini-lecture you have to give 90% of the time you come out to people
-Seeing ace discourse and feeling ready to puke
-When people are excited about a hot person or are obviously horny and you’re just sitting there like…. Okay? Uhhhhhh….. What do I do here?
-Ace puns.
-So many ace puns.
-Pretending you knew what people were talking about when your friends started having “those feelings” as teenagers
-Seriously. Ace puns. It’s like 50% ace puns. We do a pretty ace job of it.

Season 1: Wow, Bojack is a real piece of shit.

Season 2: Okay let’s be honest he’s deeply depressed and messed up and had a horrible childhood but he’s still an unbelievable asshole and I’m glad the narrative isn’t trying to excuse his actions because of his pain.

Season 3: He just keeps sabotaging himself and in doing so dragging people down with him. He never thinks about the consequences his actions have on others, and even when he admits that he hurts people it’s always in a self-centered way. I love this show, and I love the side characters, and Bojack is an absolutely fascinating, complex protagonist but I will never, ever, ever actually like him.

Season 4: I love Bojack so much it goddamned hurts.

Fangirls’ logic:

*when we hate the good guys*

OMG they are so freaking annoying LOOK there they go again trying to save the kids from the fire ridiculous BITCH you can’t even save yourself go drown in a puddle or something UGH so annoying

*when we love the bad guys*

LEAVE THEM ALONE OKAY they are just misunderstood babies so they killed a few people SO WHAT they were not even good characters anyways DO YOU MISS THEM?? I DONT LEAVE MY BABIES BE

love for the signs
  • aries: i love you because you're fiercely, genuinely, mercilessly yourself. with a whip-sharp tongue and bright eyes, you are all i admire and all i ever want to be. you say what's on my mind - you are like part of my soul. you remind me of who i am, and i'm never more sure of myself when i'm with you.
  • taurus: i love you because you're so warm and soft. i am undeserving of your gentleness, your tenderness, your patience and comfort - but you offer it to me anyway. you hold me up when i'm in danger of falling down, and you make me laugh when i feel like all i'd rather do is cry. you are forever my guardian angel, and i could never be thankful enough.
  • gemini: i love you because you make me feel alive. it's like life comes into focus when you are around - everything is vivid, interesting, beautiful. you're like a shot of oxytocin when the darkness comes creeping in, and i could never get enough of you.
  • cancer: i love you because you feel like home. we may not see eye to eye, but you stand by me when i need it most. you are the rock keeping steady by my side, and there is a quiet familiarity you bring that always puts me at ease. you are my family.
  • leo: i love you because you make me feel like i am the brightest star in the sky. you treat me like a princess, and your vivacity makes my heart deliriously happy no matter the circumstances. you are the light of my life, radiant and unforgettable.
  • virgo: i love you because you are like stable ground in the middle of an earthquake. you ground me, see into me - not past me like so many people do. you help me feel okay when things feel anything but. you are unchanging in the face of chaos, and i know i can always turn to you.
  • libra: i love you because you never push me too far. i don't feel like i have to act around you - unlike others, you don't expect anything from me, and it's a freedom more relieving than words can explain. you let me be without a mask, and sometimes that's all i need.
  • scorpio: i love you because we don't need words. i can count on you to have my back when it counts, and you understand when i need silence more than conversation. you know the importance of quiet, and i appreciate that more than you know.
  • sagittarius: i love you because you see my potential. you are my inspiration, my brilliant epiphany - you make life something fresh and new, filled with adventure and excitement. you make me believe that there is so much on the horizon. with you i could forget my problems - you are irreplaceable, my elixir like nothing else.
  • capricorn: i love you because you try your very best. you may not be able to read my mind, but you put your entire heart and soul into doing whatever you can for me. sometimes it's not the result that counts but the effort, and you prove that to the furthest extent.
  • aquarius: i love you because you bring me back to reality. you not only listen, but you speak, and your honesty means everything to me. you never judge me - instead, you take everything i give you and try to help me with all your heart. your dedication is unwavering, and no matter how deep under i am, you never let me drown.
  • pisces: i love you because you are so damned strong. you've been through so much shit, and yet i know that you'd drop everything in a second to help me. despite everything you've suffered, you still look at life like it's the best thing you've ever been given. i don't deserve your support and optimism, but you have the best heart of anyone i've ever known - and i know that somehow, it's always open for me.
Okay but in wolfstar fics I feel like people get their coming out wrong

The marauders grew up in a less understanding time. James and peter wouldn’t just be like “lol whatever”

Remus would be first to come out (pan, gay, bi, etc.). They already accepted him as a werewolf, so he would have a bit more courage. Sirius, who grew up in a less loving household, would be scared shitless.

When Remus came out Peter would be soooo uncomfortable (a little bigoted and very disturbed), but he would have no clue what to do. So, he would look to James.

James would be silent then ask questions, which then would probably be ‘open minded’ but now be terrible. He would ask how it was possible, ask if he had ever looked at any of the others in a sexual way, ask if he had sex, if he hadn’t if he was sure he was gay, it would continue like that for a while. Once James was satisfied (which would take HOURS, in which Sirius would stay extremely quiet and Peter would look mad during(adding a few questions of his own)) James would end the conversation with the classic “as long as you never like me we’re good.”

But it wouldn’t be good.

Suddenly Peter and James wouldn’t change in front of Remus, they would look sick when they saw Remus talking to a guy who wasn’t in their group, and they avoided him as much as possible.

This went on for a month or so.

Sirius the only one treating him the same.

It ends when Remus breaks down crying one night, to Lily of all people. And Lily being an amazing person (and possibly bi/pan) gets pissed. She rounds up the other three and screams at them until her voice is raw, telling them how they hurt Remus.

After that night James is back to normal and even tears up apologizing to Remus. Because while James was raised in a different time he’s a bro™ and would get over it and even come to love it once everything set it. Peter would take another week or two but, as always, would follow James’ lead.

Sirius would be too scared from James’ and peter’s reaction to come out willingly for at least a few months, maybe a year.

Remus finds out, he accidentally stumbles upon a nude magazine of men that he knows isn’t his. He confronts Sirius who denies it and cries but Remus just says he’ll love Sirius no matter what. After a minute Sirius says it out loud and it’s a big relief.

Remus doesn’t make Sirius come out to the others because he knows how hard it is. It isn’t until a bad full moon that Sirius comes out. Kind of.

Remus is unconscious and bloody and they don’t know if he’ll make it. Sirius is over him, clutching him tightly, mumbling about how Remus can’t leave him, saying how much he loves him. James and Peter whiteness the entire thing but say nothing.

Weeks later Remus is better and Peter is acting weird and detached again, this time only staying close to James.

One time when James and Sirius are alone he asks him how long he had been in love with Remus, then how long he had known he was gay. He apologizes for how he had talked about Remus when the werewolf had first come out, then he cries a little and apologizes for if he made Sirius upset or scared to come out. They cry together and fall asleep on the common room couch hugging.

Sirius officially comes out as gay to the marauders two days later.

They all nod knowingly and there’s a flicker of hope in Remus’ eyes that only James catches. This is when he becomes the ultimate wolfstar shipper and makes multiple plans to get them together. He executes them with the help of Peter (who starts acting supportive eventually) and Lily.

All three are upset when a year into their plans they figure out that Remus and Sirius had been together for half of that time. They 100% find out by waking in on the two making out/banging.

It’s seeing James go from bigot to the biggest gay shipper ever that makes lily realize she could maybe love him, or at lest give him a chance.

The point is:
MAKE JAMES AND PETER WORK TO COME TO UNDERSTAND OTHER SEXUALITIES, STOP PRETENDING PEOPLE WERE AUTOMATICALLY WOKE THIRTY YEARS AGO

If you don’t have BPD read this

I’m so tired of the stigma associated with BPD. (Borderline personality disorder) it makes me angry when I see the judgment of it from people who don’t have it.


Borderlines are not all the same. This is not a one size fits all illness. Not everyone is going to have exactly the same symptoms. We are all different. So when people without it, “diagnose” and think you don’t have it because you’re not doing this symptom or that symptom is irritating. Unless you’re a doctor I don’t believe in your “diagnosis”.


Not all borderlines are monsters. Again, NOT all borderlines are monsters. Every time I hear how we are narcissistic (no sweetie that’s a separate disorder get your disorders straight), violent, manipulative, attention-seeking, abusive, dramatic, etc. the list can go on of judgments. We aren’t all monsters okay? A lot of us are actually kind, loving people. That’s part of why we have episodes. The end result is always us wanting to die. It’s never how we think you should die. We always take blame for everything. Even if a borderline doesn’t tell you that out loud it’s true.


BPD is not like bipolar disorder. Yes, it’s similar but it’s also very different. Bipolar is a chemical imbalance that you can balance out with medication. BPD is not. Bipolar mood swings are spaced apart typically by weeks or months or days borderlines have mood swings that severe within minutes. And it’s in the genetic makeup of our brain. You can only truly treat it with DBT therapy and even then it never truly goes away.


You don’t need to be admitted to a mental asylum if you have BPD. DO NOT say someone with BPD is crazy or psycho or anything like that. If the person with BPD says it about themselves that’s one thing. If you say that to a borderline you’re going to set them off. Also be aware that what a borderline says while they have a mental breakdown is not always true. When we have our episodes and are upset, we say a lot irrational things.


FINALLY, best for last. What is it like to have BPD? It feels like you’re drowning. All the time. You can’t even trust yourself because you’re constantly having this battle in your head between you and the disorder. You have literally no or very little control over your emotions. And that’s not just an opinion, a doctor will tell you that as well. It feels like you have a separate personality that is evil and bad and horrible and you have no control over it. Hence why it’s a PERSONALITY disorder. Or you feel like you have no personality and you can’t ever figure out who you want to be. So you’re constantly in a never ending search of who you are and it’s exhausting. Oh, and here’s a really important tip. Don’t slut shame a borderline. The high sex drive is literally part of the disorder and is classified as a symptom. Don’t be a judgmental prude about it. The borderline is already aware of it and feels bad enough about it.

End the stigma. Raise awareness, not the suicide rate.

If MCR Songs Were People

This probably already exists but I spent two hours doing this instead of sleeping. Tell me which song you’re most like.

Welcome to the Black Parade: has a flair for the dramatic, doesn’t know how to do a smoky eye, was in the marching band in high school, daddy issues.

Sleep: has insomnia, PTSD, nightmares, is self deprecating, just wants to go the fuck to sleep

Destroya: probably gay, moans like a bitch during sex, pretty fucking hardcore, shit immune system though, lives for anarchy

House of Wolves:
will burn in hell (or believes they will), is a bad mother fucker, has a sister who should be scared, pyromaniac, “Catholic”

Vampire Money: all over the place, drinks a lot but parties like a beast, has a Bowie obsession, likes driving fast and loud music

Na Na Na: really artistic, pansexual, likes to scream lyrics, rebel at heart, probably still wears bandanas, sunglasses and boots all day every  day, fuck the government

Cancer: is dying, will die, all of your friends will die, actually doesn’t have any friends, really depressed, in pain, martyr

S.I.N.G: activist, owns jeggins, would join an underground gang if they had the balls, likes neon things for some unknown reason

Early Sunsets Over Monroeville: loves zombies, probably owns a Hawaiian   shirt, really quiet and doesn’t talk much, hangs out in shopping centres/malls but never buys anything

Demolition Lovers: is probably part of an underground gang, has to go away for “work” a lot, has a shotgun in the trunk of their car, teal,  unrequited love

Helena: recent death in the family, super fucking dramatic, lots of makeup, always wears black (maybe some red), nail polish is always chipped, imagines/fantasises things that will never happen all the time

Teenagers:
super punk, goes to concerts all the time, will break shit just for fun, has authority issues, probably friends with a lot of delinquents, is a delinquent, doesn’t read books, drinks a lot

Famous Last Words:
is constantly having an existential crisis, really   committed when it comes to relationships, cowboy boots, goes outside at midnight for no reason

I Don’t Love You: always heartbroken, never cuts hair, plays guitar,  goes on road trips when things get difficult, super emotional, cries a lot

I’m Not Okay:
is still in high school, I don’t care if they’re 39  they’re still in high school, hates high school, does stupid shit all  the time because fuck it, high school, is not okay, is friends with  weird people, high school

Mama: PTSD, self deprecating, mama’s boy/girl/person, has a sick sense of humour, laughs manically for no reason, cutthroat

You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison: probably gay, went to prison, had a fuck tonne of bitches (I’m kidding, they were actually the  bitch to a fuck tonne of other people), can’t adjust, has issues with  family

Headfirst for Halos: epic, is not okay, always trying to think  positively but is screaming inside, thinks about doing stupid shit all  the time (i.e. Putting a gun to their head)

Vampires Will Never Hurt You: screams a lot, has a vampire fettish, hates Twilight with a passion, has never gone outside, wouldn’t mind dying if I was a wooden stake to the heart, sucks dick

The Ghost of You:
fought in WWII, had a pretty girlfriend, wears round glasses with gold rims, is tall and lanky, has a brother, gets shot in  the chest, screams, dies

The Light Behind Your Eyes: is finding ways to deal with severe depression, cries a bit but quietly, reads a lot of books, all their friends are dead, trying to stay strong despite the fact they’re dying inside, sings like an angel

Give ‘em Hell Kid: lives life fast, probably has killed someone, wears red and like khaki green, shouts a lot, belongs in a 2005 MTV short, lives life on the edge, fatalistic

To The End: has read Dante’s Inferno, is a mafioso, fatalistic, has  probably organised the death of many people, likes to drink cyanide, sleeps a lot, owns diamond jewellery, likes cake

The Jetset Life is Gonna Kill You: has no faith in life, likes western movies, will yell at you, has  applied for a license to kill, likes to sleep with people (like nap I  mean)

Thank You For The Venom: likes snakes, has probably almost OD’d, hates  the doctors, is stubborn, death obsessed, has probably stabbed someone, wears striped long sleeve t-shirts, hates running, hopes to be shot one day

Hang 'Em High: is death obsessed, clinically insane, screams a lot,  always makes a lot of aesthetic statements about things with black and  white connotations, Catholic, fuck off

It’s Not a Fashion Statement It’s a Fucking Death Wish: swears in front  of their parents, wears their mum’s clothes, is obsessed with killing  enemies, is always predicting their death to be soon.

Cemetery Drive: all too real, has a girlfriend, likes to hang out in  cemeteries, girlfriend has issues and ended her life, now has issues  because of it, drinks a lot, really fucking depressed

I Never Told You What I Do For A Living: is 100% a serial killer, sociopath, also has OCD, scary as shit

The End: is dying, but isn’t too sad, wishes to attend their own funeral  as a ghost, has no self confidence, can’t be fucking bothered growing  up, doesn’t give a shit, is very chill, wears yellow accessories

Dead!: Is dead, is having a party about being dead, wondering if all the  assholes in their life are in hell, no one actually likes them, laughs  at inappropriate moments, is a great dancer

This Is How I Disappear: really fucking dramatic, will be upset and   disappear if you break up with them, dramatic, is a part time satanist, will make a voodoo doll of you if you fuck with them, candles

The Sharpest Lives: goes out late at night, never showers, drinks   heavily, would probably go cannibal if it was legal, always in pain,   lives life on the fucking edge, will burn large objects, has sinus   issues

Disenchanted: is constantly torn, never actually cries, writes books,  likes to take chances, likes birds, got in trouble with the police for  some stupid but really fun shit, friends need to get their shit together  and learn a lesson

Bulletproof Heart: Gravity doesn’t mean to much to them, has self  confidence but not enough to stop running away, runs away a lot, wears  really funky colourful clothing, is very kind but misunderstood

Planetary GO!: goes to a lot of cool night clubs, knows how to fucking  party, is still very punk on the inside, sweats a lot (bc they dance a  lot), jumps up and down for no fucking reason

The Only Hope For Me Is You: is obsessed with being remembered, only has  one friend, is kinda depressed and really needs someone to hold onto,  but is also really questioning life and society, wants to run away to a  more aesthetic place

Party Poison: speaks fluent Japanese (cough I mean Weeaboo), watches a  lot of anime, loves Kpop and Jpop fashion, will party but goes to the  weirdest parties, dyes their hair, fuck the bullshit meaning of life  they do what they want

Save Yourself I’ll Hold Them Back: is a badass, known for being a  badass, stole your mum’s car and took you on the best date ever, wears a  lot of leather, ready for a fight, probably gets into a lot of fights  anyway, probably once looked like Danny from Greece

SCARECROW: is probably on LSD, smokes a lot of weed, is really chill,  too fucking chill, wears psychedelic t-shirts, is actually a  philosophical genius, reads a lot of poetry

Summertime: they might go outside if it’s summer, listens to music with  headphones on full blast, goes on the train a lot, likes to walk around  listening to music and pretends they’re making the aesthetic parts of  the music video they’re listening to, soft kitty

The Kids From Yesterday: is constantly nostalgic, loves Star Wars and  Queen, always having flashbacks, wears yellow and read things, feels  misunderstood, trying to figure out the meaning of life

Honey, This Mirror Isn’t Big Enough For The Two Of Us: likes Fall Out  Boy when they had long song titles, has issues, a lot of issues, ugly  screams a lot, doesn’t care, wears dark denim jackets, hates this girl  who fucked their brother

Drowning Lessons: has a lot of anxiety, constantly worried, always  running away from problems and situations, can’t swim, always has  regrets, has pink things

Our Lady Of Sorrows: was in a gang once, loves to get into switchblade fights, is really scary and bloodthirsty, believes in pagan gods, but   will protect you, blood blood blood.

Skylines and Turnstiles: saw 9/11 happen, life was changed because of  it, decided that they wanted to be in a band, made a band with brother  and his fren, got some dreadlocked weed smoking fanboy to join, the  drummer is an asshole x3, breaks up after 12 years, deems it to be a  good idea, scared of butane

This Is The Best Day Ever: this is the worst day ever, has no rhythm, is  really confused with what is going in, went to hospital a lot and hated  it, screams a bit, is a bit scared of needles, studded belts, suck dick

Cubicles: will die alone (or at least they think), hates their job, the  only thing that entertains them at work is people gossiping at the water  cooler, is actually having a severe existential crisis

Boy Division: is friends with people who would have a fucking rocking  funeral, stalks school girls, looks dead but only dresses that way,  likes to sing about California, paranoid all the time

Tomorrow’s Money: fell in love with a vampire, slightly aggressive, can  surf, stopped screaming three years ago, wants to be a doctor, hates   people who are thought of as heroes, ruined converses

AMBULANCE: screams in an aesthetically pleasing way, thinks you know  nothing, super weird, goes out after dark, likes to drive big cars,  wouldn’t mind driving, is super reliable even when they let you down

Gun.: was probably conscripted into the military, actually hates   violence and guns, wants to stay at home all the time, likes to call the  shots, owns an old uniform that they’ll never throw out

The World Is Ugly: likes Blade Runner and fairy lights, thinks weird  people are very beautiful, insanely observant of other people’s  behaviours, wears knee high socks and converses, hates the world because  it’s terrible

Kiss The Ring: belongs in an alternate universe where it’s still the  medieval time but rock bands exist, is probably a contract killer, likes  to overthrow the king every five years, has really fucked up logic  about why it’s okay to kill a lot of people, cutthroat

Make Rooom!!!!: probably goes to discos, does not panic at them,  actually has some self confidence but always gets into stupid situations  and flails, wears the tightest pants in the world, wears earrings with  crosses on them

Surrender the Night: constantly lonely, likes to drive long distances to  think, lost a loved one, has cool patches on their jacket, has been to  hospital twice, likes to listen to you, always keeps secrets unless you  fuck with them

Burn Bright
: likes going to the city just to look at all the lights,   walks around and thinks that certain things would look nice on Tumblr,   unstable, can be aggressive, very in tune with their surroundings, kind of a Buddhist

Common People: your average person, always struggling financially, wears  a lot of blue, always falls in love with shallow rich girls for no  reason, really just wants to live however the fuck they want

Every Snowflake Is Different: loves children’s TV shows, goes to the  snow every year, loves winter and hot chocolate, will cry if you take  their toys away, will be a good parent, too busy having fun to give a  fuck

Desolation Row: got beat up at school, is now in a cutthroat gang, spits  a lot, wears a lot of eyeliner, likes Grease but is also super punk  rock, hates wearing underwear, likes to break shit all the time

Desert Song: is recovering from a drug addiction, is still in a really  dark place, trying to stay strong, is questioning the meaning of life,  probably had teal roots at some stage

Black Dragon Fighting Society: drinks juice when they’re killing because  it’s fucking delicious, really likes dragons, reads too much, hates  society, would run away but that would mean no books and no juice so no  fucking way, likes hot pink and black

Zero Percent: hates everyone, would kill everyone, really hates people,  does whatever the fuck they want, will kill everybody, will put zero   effort into school or work, does their own thing.

Mastas of Ravenkroft: worried about growing old, has no self confidence,  will only have sex if the lights are turned off, feels very old at a  very young age because of shitty bones, also has no fucking chill

F.T.W.W.W.:
fuck society, is super digital, but also really retro,   always tells people to kiss their ass, lives in a futuristic society,   likes robots, has a licking fettish, likes to destroy shit, will   probably spit randomly

We Don’t Need Another Song About California: Summertime’s long lost  twin, really doesn’t give a shit about California, but likes the sun,  probably lives in Florida, hates magazines, probably has a fake name,  thinks that nothing matters

All The Angels: is dying, has minutes left, girlfriend has issues   because she’s a little risky, everything has gone wrong, everyone is   upset, probably died three years ago, never went to heaven, likes pretty  flowers and dead things

Romance:
a complete and utter 1800s Romantic, has probably ready  Frankenstein, wants to go on epic journeys, never showers, likes spices,  old fashioned, would probably get into the steampunk fashion thing

Blood: is forever in the 1920s, was a war hero but hates themself,  laughs manically sometimes, has a thing for blood but hates vampires,  90% human wreckage, 23% awful fuck, 8% bad at math, 14% clueless

Positive Coping Thoughts

For those who have been emotionally neglected or abused, your head may be filled to the brim with negative thoughts about yourself and the world around you. As I’ve emphasized in my past posts, these negative thoughts come from how you were treated or raised growing up. While you are working toward recovery, it is essential to add some positive coping thoughts to your regular practice. Here are some good positive coping thoughts to tell yourself during times when you become triggered… many of them specialized for those who are healing from emotional abuse/neglect:

I am important and worthy. (Even if my family tried to brainwash me otherwise).

I am ALWAYS deserving of love and respect.

I am a survivor.

The fact I am standing here today is proof of my unquestionable strength.

I will continue to move forward in life with my strength.

I will not tolerate disrespect, violence, or disregard in any of my relationships.

I do not need to maintain relationships with people who do not prioritize me or who actively hurt me.

It is completely okay to cut people out of my life. 

I NEED to learn how to cut people out of my life, as it is a part of my healthy recovery.

I will not overwork myself in my relationships, and give more than I am receiving.

I deserve to receive.

I will strive to live my life with balance.

It is okay to say no.

I don’t need to answer or respond to anyone’s negative thoughts or opinions.

Someone’s negativity is not mine to hold; it is theirs.

It is okay to make mistakes. I am only human. We all make mistakes.

I may feel bad about myself now, but that is only because I have never gotten the chance to discover who I really am.

I deserved so much more than what my parents/family gave me.

I will commit to rising above my parents’/family’s negativity, in order to actualize my true self.

From this point on, I refuse to let anyone hold me back, including my parents/family/abuser.

You can also make up your own positive coping thoughts, but write them down in your journal or put it in your phone–whatever helps you. And pull them out when you need a reminder. It’ll take time to shift your thinking, so expect that, but if you make your positive coping thoughts into a habit, I guarantee you that your mind will eventually start to shift! ♥

2

If these skins are based off what I think they are, and I know they are.

I GOT SOMETHING TO SAY:

To quote my mother: “This isn’t even a Yoruba Masquerade, They took and Igbo Masquerade and gave him flip flops.”

Masquerades are sacred beings that represents spirits in our culture and they are to be revered and respected. Of course we know that humans are in there but you never see someone putting on the costume right?

To SEE that a human is dressed as a Masquerade breaks the illusion of what they are and is frowned upon.

While my family is Igbo and Akande is Yoruba I spoke to my mothers about if this sort of thing is okay. It’s not. Yoruba people may handle their Masquerades differently than an Igbo person but I showed her these pictures and she said, like i quoted above, that is an Igbo Masquerade.

I have loved the amount of research, time and care that Blizzard has put into Akande but this one of the fears POCs have when other people take on their cultures but i know for Nigeria tbh DO NOT TOUCH OUR SPIRITS. Not only is it bad that they put the costume on him in general but it looks like they mixed up the tribes and that honestly is just as if not more insulting.

Igbo and Yoruba people have enough to deal without their cultures being used interchangeably.

There are an estimated 3000+ tribes in the entire continent of Africa and over 500 in Nigeria, please do not continue this harmful delusion that all Africans are the same, especially when you want to use our cultures for whatever purposes you see fit.

What I say: I’m fine.
What I mean: Ben Platt has suffered so much from his role as Evan Hansen, not only do all of the shows mess up his voice and health, he also has adapted harmful habits like nail biting and hunched posture and increased anxiety from having played Evan so often and so he has to go to physical therapy, not to mention all the times he has cried on stage, and yet people are rude to him when he is too tired to greet his ‘fans’ or whatever, wth is wrong with people, please be okay Ben Platt, I love you so much-

Dear Spoonies,

It is okay to not always be positive when having a rough time. 

It’s okay to doubt whether or not you have a purpose in life in the midst of a bad flare.

It is okay to be apprehensive about what the future holds.

It is okay to cut off people who don’t support you as a chronically ill person.

Please reblog with other things it’s okay for spoonies to think/feel/do. I want this to be almost like a love letters to spoonies letting them know that what they are feeling/doing/thinking is normal. Spread the love and positivity!

I am afraid of a lot of things, but the thing I am most afraid of is the unknown. I don’t know his thoughts about me, so I spend hours contemplating his every word spoken to me. I wonder when he will fall out of love with me. I wonder if he will ever think about me when he leaves. I wonder if I will find a job after falling into debt to get this degree. I wonder if I will do well in the job. I wonder if people think I am pretty, I wonder if I look okay. I wonder about a lot of things. I wonder how I will die, when I will die, what day of the week it will be, and who I will be with. I am unable to think in the present because I am so scared of the future.
—  I am scared of things that I don’t know about yet. 
reddie headcanon

warning: some sexual assault, alcohol, drugs
requested by: @whipashwhipash

-reddie decides to go to a party and while the party scene isn’t eddie’s cup of tea, he goes because richie loves going to parties

-when they arrive, eddie practically clings onto richie, holding his hand and keeping close to his boyfriend as they move through the crowds of people in the house

-“i won’t leave you, okay?” richie whispers into his ear, kissing his cheek

-eddie stays close as richie starts talking to people eddie isn’t familiar with

-richie introduces eddie to this friends and all eddie can do is smile and nervously looks around

-when they make it to the least crowded part of the party, like an hour later, richie asks eddie if he’s ready to go home

-eddie knows richie doesn’t want to leave so early, so he plasters a fake smile on his face and shakes his head

-“we can stay a little bit longer.”

-“are you sure? because it’s no big deal if you wanna leave.”

-eddie shakes his head again and kisses Richie

-they sit around in the kitchen a little while longer, talking a little and richie tries make eddie feel more comfortable and tries to make him laugh adn loosen up

-“can i have something to drink?” eddie asks

-richie nods and grabs a plastic cup off the stack on the counter

-“what do you want?” richie asks his boyfriend

-“something that will loosen me up,” eddie says, nervously fiddling with his fingers as he leans agianst the kitchen counter

-richie gives him a look, not sure what’s going on

-“you don’t drink, eds,” he says, laughing a little

-“yeah, maybe i should try it, though,” eddie shrugs, trying not to look as nervous as he feels

-“eddie, you don’t have to have something to drink because everyone else is,” richie says, his voice serious

-“please, rich,” eddie pleads, his eyes never leaving Richie’s

-richie doesn’t want to, but he hisitantly grabs some fruit punch out of the fridge and a bottle of some kind of alcohol (eddie has no idea what it is but richie does so he doesn’t panic as much)

-when richie is done with the concoction he’s made, he hands the cup to eddie

-richie makes himself a cup of the same thing and they clink their cups together before taking sips

-“hey, it’s not as bad as i thought,” eddie says, taking another sip
-richie laughs

-“that’s because i mixed the alcohol with fruit punch, eds.”

-richie decides to go back out to the party, grabbing Eddie’s hand

-when eddie lets go, richie turns back to look at him

-“you’re not coming?” he asks

-“nah, i’ll just stay here,” eddie says, shaking his head

-“oh, okay,” richie says, feeling uneasy about leaving eddie alone

-“you can go,” eddie says, giving him a smile

-“i don’t want to leave you alone, though,” richie sighs

-“i’ll be fine. i really just don’t want to go in there, where it’s crowded with all those people,” eddie says

-“are you sure you’ll be fine?” richie asks

-eddie nods and richie leans over to kiss him

-“if you need me, i’ll be in the living room, talking to that group of guys you saw me talking to earlier,” richie says before smiling at eddie and leaving

-eddie stays in the same spot for another ten minutes, sipping at his drink, bobbing his head to the music he’s never listened to before, and looking around at the stranger’s kitchen he’s standing in

-“you look like youre having a great time,” someone says over eddie’s shoulder, causing the boy to turn around

-eddie sees it’s one of the guys richie was talking to earlier and he smiles, not knowing what else to say

-“you don’t talk much, do you?” the guy asks

-eddie just kinda of shrugs

-“i’m not good with meeting new people,” eddie says quietly, sitting his drink down on the counter

-“i’m chris,” the guys introduces himself (again), holding his hand out for eddie to shake

-“i’m eddie,” eddie says, shaking chris’ hand

-“yeah, richie’s always talking about you,” chris laughs a little. “I understand why now.”

-that last statement makes eddie feels a little uneasy but the more he talks to chris, the more he feels himself getting loose

-“i’ll be back, i have to go to the bathroom,” eddie excuses himself, heading out of the kitchen and down the hall to where the thinks the bathroom is

-when he comes back, chris is still in the same spot, sipping at his own drink

-eddie grabs his drink from the counter and takes a sip, leaning agianst the counter like was before

-it takes another ten minutes for eddie to realize something isn’t right, and the more he drinks what’s in his cup, the worse he feels

-eddie feels sluggish and his vision is getting blurry and he can barely understand chris as he tells eddie they’re going upstairs

-eddie feels his body moving, but doesn’t know where he’s going and he doesn’t say a word as the music gets louder and the chatter of people fills his senses

-and then it’s quiet again because they’re upstairs in someone’s bedroom and eddie’s being thrown on the bed and then the weight of someone else’s body is over his and eddie doesn’t know what’s going on

-“just be quiet and this will all be over,” chris says into eddie’s ear as eddie starts to squirm and wiggle about on the bed

-eddie can feel chris’ lips all over his body and his hands and he doesn’t like this, but all he can do is mumble “no no no stop” as he tries to get out of chris’ grip

-chris has his hand covering eddie’s mouth and that’s when eddie tries to shout

-“richie!” he tries to call out with chris’ hand over his mouth. “richie, help!’

-and that’s when eddie blacks out

-but just a few minutes after eddie blacking out, richie is knocking hard on the locked door adn he’s screaming out for chris to open it

-"YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE, OPEN THE DOOR!”

-he continues to bang on the door for a few more moments, but then he stops

-and then the door is being kicked open and richie comes storming in, a group of people watching at the door as he shoves a stunned chris off of eddie

-richie looks over at eddie, his shirt not on his body anymore and his jeans unbuttoned and he can’t help but wonder what would’ve happened if he hadn’t have gotten upstairs in time

-richie saw chris taking eddie upstairs, but his “friends” held him back from following him, as if they knew what chris was going to do and they were helping him

-richie holds back his tears as he stares down at eddie and then rage fills him as he walks over to chris and punches him square in the face

-richie gets on top of chris as he’s knocked down and continues to bash his face in

-“YOU DISGUSTING MOTHERFUCKER,” richie says under his breath. “DON’T YOU FUCKING COME NEAR ME OR MY BOYFRIEND EVER AGAIN.”

-richie is pulled off of chris by some random dudes, who richie shoves away, walking straight over to eddie and buttoning his pants back up and grabbing his shirt off the floor, putting it back on his body

-richie carries eddie downstairs and outside to his car, lying him down in the backseat

-richie grabs a blanket from the trunk of his car and puts it over eddie’s body before walking around to get in the driver’s seat

-when he’s sat down, richie breaks down behind the wheel and cries so hard

-he can’t help but feel it’s his fault and he hits his hea don the steering wheel several times, mad at himself

-he doesn’t want to go home, but he knows another place he go

-they get to bill’s house and when bill opens the door, seeing eddie unconscious in richie’s arms, he’s scared and confused

-“what happened?” bill asks, moving out of the way for richie and eddie to come through

-“I’ll tell you about it in a minute,” richie says, still crying a little. “where can i put him?”

-bill leads them up the stairs to his room and richie lies eddie down, throwing the covers over his body, kissing his forehead and moving the hair away from his face

-bill and richie go back downstairs and sit down on the couch in the living room

-richie explains to bill what happened and richie breaks down again

-bill pulls him in and wraps his arms around his friend and holds him while he cries

-“it wasn’t your fault,” bill says. “and it wasn’t eddie’s fault.”

-“i shouldn’t have brought him to that party,” richie says quietly

-“shhh…” bill says, still holding richie, “everything will be okay.”

-about an hour and a half passes and bill makes tea for richie and eddie and says they can stay if they want since his parents aren’t home for the weekend

-richie takes his and eddie’s cups of tea and heads upstairs to see if eddie is awake

-he is and he’s sitting up in the bed, staring down at his fingers

-“hey,” richie says, walking over to him and sitting their mugs down on the nightstand

-richie sits down on the bed with eddie and, pulling the covers up over them and wrapping his arms around eddie, pulling the boy closer into him

-that’s when eddie bursts out crying and he holds onto richie so tight, as if his life depends on it

-“i’m here,” richie says quietly. “it’s okay, i’m here, eddie spaghetti.”

-when eddie calms down, he tells richie all that he can remember and he tells him that he calling for him and he was so scared he didn’t know what to do

-“i’m sorry, eddie,” richie says

-“why are you sorry? you saved me, richie.”

-“i just wished i could go back and not bring you to that party,” richie says. “it was my fault. i’m sorry i let you down.”

-eddie makes richie look at him

-“richie tozier, this wasn’t your fault,” eddie says softly. “you saved me. i’m so thankful for you and i love you so much.”

-he kisses richie’s lips softly and richie pulls him back into his body, holding him close and not letting him go


this was probably shit and it’s really long but i almost cried writing it ok

also tagging: @trashmoutheds@stanleyurisisalive @spicyymoon–lovve @king-wheezy-trash @trxshmouth-t0zier @t-rash-m-outh @rainy-kaspbrak @eddie-kaspjack ily guys sm <3

Attention Buzzfeed Unsolved fans

I’m not sure how old you all are or how long you’ve been on Tumblr but I’m assuming a large portion of you have been around long enough to understand what I’m about to say.

I’ve been on this website for the better part of five years and in that time I’ve watched many fandoms I held dear turn sour and toxic at a surprisingly sharp rate.

It’s painful to watch. Don’t make me watch it happen again.

If you’re like me you love Shane and Ryan. You love watching those goofy boys argue and hunt ghosts. That we can all agree on.

Something I can already see small fights starting about is whether or not shipping Shyan is okay.

We need to be more mature than past fandoms have been when it come to shipping real people.

If you’re against the shipping of real people please be respectful of those who do. Go with the classic if you don’t like it don’t look and please don’t attack those who do.

This is how fandom wars start. This is what we don’t want.

Now if you do ship Shyan you also need to be respectful also. You need to not push your ship on those who don’t ship it because at the end of the day we all love the boys. But also remember to be respectful of Ryan and Shane themselves.

I know some may not like to hear this but Shyan is for fun. You can’t go hating their actual girlfriends for getting in the way of your ship. That’s just rude and frankly weird behavior and gives fandoms a bad name.

Also never contact Shane or Ryan about the ship. It WILL make them uncomfortable. This kind of thing is fun and fine between Tumblr accounts but don’t comment about the ship on YouTube videos or their Instagram’s. That’s how these kind of things go from fun and light to toxic.

I’m giving you a small flash into an old ship called Septiplier. It was between two youtuber gamers and for a while it was all fun and games. Even the youtubers joked about in videos but it went from fun to toxic quickly when their girlfriends received death threats and they were hounded about the ship on every form of media. Even now after a year and half since the ship died because both gamers cut nearly all contact with each other to the public the ship is still always talked about. This ruined not only ship but the personal friendship of these two.

This is the last thing we want between Shane and Ryan but trust me it can and will happen if the fandom gets out of control.

So I act you, fellow fans of Buzzfeed Unsolved, to keep a level head. Have fun, make art, make fanfic and crazy theories that Shane is a demon Bigfoot monster but whatever we do, don’t let this fandom become toxic.


I’m not even sure if this was coherent but I’m hoping we can all keep this in mind. Please reblog and share with other fans to spread the word. Likes are fine but get the word around with a reblog. Also feel free to add on if you have anything worth saying.

(wheeze)