i love their t shirt videos

Some thoughts:

1. Yesterday the light was red, now it’s blue. Darkiplier? Red being the bad side, blue the good side of things?

2. He’s wearing a black t-shirt without any print. That’s Anti’s shirt, not Jack’s.

3. He want’s to bring the community together. Summon us. C̣͔̻̘o̫͓̟͍n͎̯͕v̯͙o̘k͍̥ḛ̦͚͓͙͚ us. A r͈͚̩i͔̮t̬͉̳͈̙͖̭u̺̝͍̘͇̫a͉̜̘͓ͅl.

4. What is that thumbnail? It looks SO much like Anti, I really thought that was it…!

5. His intro reminded me of the PAX East intro. “You know how much I love community interaction…”

6. He calmly introduces a fanart-week. After everything that has been going on the last 44 days, that’s really a s̬u͎̗̺͈̗r̻̜̩̙pr͔̬͎i̹s̤͎̦e̗̟.

7. Maybe that’s just me, but THE VIBES. This video feels… weird. Different. I can’t describe it. Know what I mean?

What is going onnnnnn…

Thought dump

So, I definitely feel like today’s vlog has ties with the PAX intro…..Jack liking my reply on Twitter, addressing that fact, kinda, for me, confirms that suspicion.
Cause, for one, he’s wearing the black shirt, and who do we know that loves wearing black? Anti. That’s right.
And, another thing, the intro to the video was IDENTICAL to the PAX intro. Jack said, “Today, I wanted to do something a little different..” right off the bat, I got weird vibes and had war flashbacks to the PAX intro lol I was even squinting at the video the entire time, feeling very uneasy and suspicious, and just waiting for the camera to glitch, and Anti to show up….which, obviously, he didn’t.
Also! Another thing, Jack said during the PAX intro that he “LOVES COMMUNITY INTERACTION” and said something very similar to that during the vlog today.
He ALSO said he “WANTED TO DO SOMETHING THAT BROUGHT THE COMMUNITY TOGETHER” which is what he ALSO said during the PAX intro!
So, the connections are there people! And, Jack just seemed a little off in today’s vlog as well….like he knew something we didn’t.

And, just adding this, remember his caption on Instagram, when he posted that infamous picture of his fresh new dye, Return or Reborn picture? It said, “Back in bla- I mean green!”
He was REALLY back in black today.
Now I feel like I’m rambling, I’ll just leave this here I guess haha!

But one more thing! I feel like Anti is coming back through our submissions for #septicart….like, he was born through fan art….this would be his rebirth. HE’D BE REBORN. OH SHIT!!!!!!!!!
Dating Dan would include:

A/N: I tried something different. I enjoy these kind of things a lot so I wrote my own. I know it’s not a full story, but it’s something. I’m pretty busy today since tonight is my prom! 


Originally posted by shinyphan

staying up late almost every night

really late like Dan asking you ‘Hey, did you know that cows have best friends? at 5am

lots of cuddling 

Dan is mister super squish and his cuddles are the best

‘omg you are so short’

‘no, you’re just a giant’

‘i love you so much’ sex

watching movies and eating popcorn with Phil 

holding hands on the tube 

holding hands all the time 

‘stop editing and get into bed with me’ 

‘no, honestly Dan the video is perfect already’

being best friends with Phil and other youtubers

deep conversations 24/7 

‘stop saying that! i love your hobbit hair’

phil catching you two having sex 

him writing a song on the piano for you 

‘no the leather t-shirt can’t come back from the dead’ 

‘omg have you seen that baby!’ 

listening to him waffle all the time 

getting in the shower together 

phil banging against the wall because you are too loud in bed 

‘you are such a dork, but i love you.’

traveling the world with him

being slightly irritated by his haru pillow that stares back at you during the night

going to award shows with him

him calling you sweetheart, darling or baby

‘no i won’t watch that anime with you. you’ve got Phil for that’

you giving him lots of stupid nicknames

having big plans for the future together like buying a house and getting a dog

understanding each other without words

‘baby, I need your help. are those two different shades of black?’

‘nah it’s fine. you always look good anyway’

dating yoongi would include:

[gender neutral] ☼

∙ yoongi slipping his hand into yours a lot

∙ less pda bc shy! yoongi


∙ having subtle ways of showing his love for you 

∙ yoongi blushing whenever you smile at him 

∙ “I honestly hate that you’re so adorable” 

∙ him hating that you are sad; it would make him upset :(

∙ looking after you when you are sick 

∙ yoongi pretending not to know you in public bc he’s a dork

∙ constant teasing back and forth between you both 

∙ yoongi being extremely encouraging and supportive 

∙ “I hate you” “I love you too, idiot” 

∙ long naps, snuggled up in his bed, his arms wrapped around you securely

∙ confiding secrets in each other 

∙ listening to his new tracks whilst he waits for your opinion 

∙ both of you adoring kumamon !!! 

∙ sharing clothes: sweaters, t-shirts, button-ups

∙ cosy dates with blankets + cuddles 

∙ dorky snapchats and texts 

∙ yoongi not being a fan of skinship unless its with you 

∙ dom! yoongi 

∙ promise rings !! 

∙ back hugs and piggy backs 

∙ tol or smol, yoongi loves to show you off 

∙ video game wars 

∙ hoseok referring to you as “soulmates” 

∙ jealous! yoongi 

∙ 3am Mcdonalds runs in your pjs 

∙ cuddles where he’d nuzzle his head into your neck 

∙ stealing each others phones just to take a million selcas 

∙ needy! yoongi

 ∙ pet names !! 

∙ soft, longing kisses 

∙ seeing who can cuss the most in one sitting 

∙ jungkook third wheeling 

∙ yoongi would make an adorable boyfriend !!! 

a/n: thank you for reading! second post of the day so hope this is good enough :) [yoonkook mentions]

‘Bunnies’? I got ‘bunnies’ and ‘kitties’
What the fuck is this, the Teletubbies? Why are we so pretty?
Why don’t we get it ugly and grimy
and we can get it really fugly and motherfuckin’ slimy

The guys freestyle on words folks have tweeted to warm up for a Freestyle Love Supreme show at Joe’s Pub in 2013

also Lin wearing tinted glasses that. match his shirt? also CHRIS JACKSON


Who’s That Vans Girl?: @wilddthing

Yoga lover and gorgeous mother of two, Alex Erikson takes #StopDropAndYoga to a new level. Hailing from the picturesque state of Utah, her Instagram is brimming with stunning views to go along with her pretzel-like poses. We caught up with this nature loving Vans Girl and found out more about her passions and her affinity for the Sk8-Hi.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Leela, oh man I can't wait to read your response to this video, tbh while I was watching it, half of my brain was just thinking about how much I was looking forward to your reaction

this is so unbelievably sweet and i can’t believe that you look forward to hearing my thoughts so much!! i’m going to be completely dead honest with yall (when am i not tbh) … i was not one of the people who was super jazzed about the idea of a pastel edits video. i totally sided with dan in his past live show responses about the idea–that there’s no cohesive culture or stereotypical tropes around “pastel” that they could try to imitate, and also (though he didn’t say this) that it’s basically just a product of a sort of sexualized trope that tumblr seemed to make up out of thin air. i think i generally felt that at worst it would make them really uncomfortable, and at best it would just be a video of them putting on random pastel clothes and maybe wigs and making fun of the whole concept and that’s about it. so like. god damn, i was not prepared for how good this was nor the boundaries that it pushed, especially coupled with the tweet from dan preceding it. and even though there was still a lot of mockery and grumbling about it, especially from dan, i was not prepared for how much they would genuinely enjoy it and have fun with it. i think that’s just a testament to them and their connection/chemistry more than anything–it seems like there are very few scenarios and situations they get into together that they don’t end up completely loving and enjoying almost purely bc of how much they’re able to make each other laugh and bring each other joy. but also, in this case, bc they were so visibly enjoying the opportunity to touch and flirt and see each other wear a totally different look to their norm (and incidentally those exact things were what made punk edits irl such an incredible video too).

that being said, it wasn’t all just flirting and softness. there was some unexpected depth to this, or at least, a lot of room for me to speculate about what it might mean for them to be making a video like this, speculate about how they might feel about it, etc. and in order to do that i’m going to discuss a whole bunch of things that happened in the vid in three general categories: soft things, sarcastic things, and sexual things lol. one overarching observation to begin though: um. not to objectify but. phil is lookin damn fine. idk if his running/gyming are already having an impact but he somehow looked really well built in that t-shirt in a way i don’t think i’m used to seeing, so. ok. just had to get that out of the way.

1. soft things:

obvi, deeper analysis aside, there was a lot of genuinely sweet, wholesome, lovely shit happenin’ in this vid and it all had me close to tears. first of all. the brief and gut-wrenching return of the music from the blindfolded cat game vid and the dan and phil do poppen kookin vid, aka the softest videos known to mankind. thx phil. also interesting bc that means he def associates that music with softness and maybe he thinks about those videos as being soft and adorable and pure in the same way that we do. then,,,, phil going so high pitched when he talks about dans curls and saying that he’s ‘obsessed’ and dan getting all flustered when phil touches his hair and forgetting how to talk lol. “am i consenting you?” same. just generally, this was a video full of phil being rly into dans neck tattoo and dans curls and,,,, dan. just generally lmao. ik they lie all the time about preparing for videos and make it sound like phil does all the preparation even when dan has a hand in it, but in this case i really want to believe that phil actually went out (or online) shopping for dan and picked out that sweater and dungarees mostly bc he thought it’d be rly cute to see dan wearing them, which is why he also seemed to expend less effort on shopping for his own outfits. i loved his emphatically positive comments about the various elements of the get-up like when he was putting the tattoo on dan’s neck and told him that it would look amazing in such an earnest completely non-sarcastic way!!!! and a bit earlier when dan decided to also compliment phil out of nowhere, ALSO in such a genuine and emphatic and non-sarcastic way, regarding his “accurate cutting out” skills. the way that dan was instinctively so happy with phil’s arm tattoo and his first thought was to tell phil it matches his eyes before he naturally diluted it by slipping into a sarcastic tone of voice. and the way that he was so supportive of phil’s blue wig in a way that went beyond “u look good,” but rather was more along the lines of “u look good AND this fits with this deeper thing about you that i love so much and that shows how deeply i know you, namely the way that you want to make an impact when u enter a room” ahhhhhh goodness i think they both really found each other to be very pretty in these outfits, and doing a video like this is is as much a fun and exciting thing for them to experience as it is for us to watch.

one thing that really stood out to me was the moment when dan talks about feeling like he wants to do some ‘soft’ things after assuming this new persona and then he lists some examples of what those might be: writing a poem, cloud gazing, buying some sorbet, and then phil pitches in with surfing off the edge of a waterfall … which like,,, what? lmao. but the reason this moment hit me so hard is because it was the first point in watching the video that i realized that they were completely avoiding associating the concept of “pastel” with some more generalized concept of “femininity” and rather, just associating it with softness and aesthetic choices, both of which they proceeded to discuss throughout the video with absolutely no gender typecasting attached. so in this exchange, it really struck me that even when they were listing ‘soft activities’ they didn’t say anything about wanting to do activities that are stereotypically girly, nor did they shy away from talking about embracing things that could be perceived in that way like writing poetry or hugging unicorns or eating sorbet or whatever else. really the only mention of gender at all during the video was when phil talks about finding male underwear (on dan’s laptop btw, i just need to point that out) and even then they were just bemused at the idea that men would *want* to embrace the pastel but feel the need to hide it under their jeans lol. idk,, i’ve written about this before at great length (especially last year when dan bought the rhinestoned gatorland hat) but it’s just so lovely to see both of them progress to this point of total comfort with how they might be perceived and give absolutely no mind at all to any nasty stereotypes that people might launch at them for being two men in an extremely close relationship deciding to dress up in pink and touch each other and hold rainbow umbrellas and light up unicorns. like. the very THOUGHT of that happening a few years ago would be totally absurd especially with dan’s own seemingly internalized homophobia and both of their enforcement of gender binaries/heteronormativity. and yet, it’s a point that i will never stop making bc i can’t adequately express how happy it makes me: dan and phil have grown so much. we’ve watched them blossom into these self-assured people who are confident not only in themselves but in their relationship with each other, who are proud not only of themselves but of their relationship with each other, and who no longer feel such an innate need to hide.

2. sexual things:

in a similar vein, there was so much surprisingly overt sexual flirting and innuendo in this video that absolutely was not demanded by the situation at all. with last years halloween baking, one could make the argument that it’d be hard to mess about with melted chocolate and poke sticks into balls without making a lot of innuendos and giggling at them. but,,, there’s nothing in any way sexual about phil clipping on dan’s overalls for him….like. it was a completely innocent thing for phil to do. but dan decided to say “strapping me up on camera there’s a certain audience for this sort of video” while it was happening, as though *inviting* us to interpret this sexually, putting the thought into our heads on his own terms. the same applies to the tweet teasing the video. first of all he didn’t need to tweet at all but he did, to promo a video that wasn’t even on his own channel i want to point out. and if he wanted to promo it he could’ve just done a generic “just got done filming with phil” tweet or even a “wow just got done filming with phil and now we’re so messy” tweet but instead of leaving it there he took it to an explicitly sexual place of his own accord and, again, on his own terms. i can’t think of an explanation for this besides the notion that dan wants us to get used to thinking about them in sexual contexts, and he’s trying to push back a little on the strictly platonic and g-rated image they’ve built for themselves and their interactions. of course one could easily point out as a counter-argument that this isn’t the absolute first time they’ve made sexual comments about themselves. a good fairly recent example, but still pre-baking universe, was when they did the 3 legged ddr video on dapg and dan kept making comments about bondage and whatnot. but that still seems so different to me than many of the examples from this video for two reasons: first because, as mentioned before, the situation in the 3 legged ddr vid, in which they were literally taping themselves together, kind of demands innuendo in a more immediate way than like, strapping on overalls does. and, second, because the comments in that vid still seemed a tad uncomfortable, somewhat like dan envisioning the way that people would be screaming about these moments and sexualizing them anyway, and feeling forced to acknowledge the sexual overtones of the situation himself to get out in front of it. in this video, the difference is that dan truly and happily *went out of his way* to make these sexual and flirty comments, about the overalls, about tattooing phil’s penis or his ass, about phil biting him if he (dan) mentions cotton candy. and on and on. like,,,,, totally unnecessary, totally comments that dan made of his own volition bc he *wanted* to and *chose* to and that is so so important to me.

at the same time, phil, while less vocal in his flirting, broke the g-rated boundaries in his own ways, especially, and probs most memorably, by unzipping his trousers plainly in view of the camera and then plainly in view of dan. i was really shocked to see that and felt like i’d been totally transported back to 2008 lol. they’re both making these conscious decisions to unravel certain parts of this veneer they’ve had in place for so long and it’s something so exciting and monumental to me.

3. sarcastic comments:

as exciting as all of the above is, there hasn’t been a total transformation yet. there was still some visible discomfort with aspects of what they were doing, mostly on dan’s part, but a bit on phil’s as well, and to me it came out mostly in the form of super sarcastic comments sprinkled throughout the video. at 2:38 when dan says “it’s just like so pastel,” in the most mocking voice of all time. pretty much the whole time they are looking thru the example pics and trying not to make fun of the edits, but then basically openly shitting on the whole concept of aesthetic moodboards and whatnot. the “this is so stupid” comment that dan makes around that time. at 5:38 phil saying, “wow dan you look so soft.” this one is less clear but to me it definitely sounded sarcastic and mocky. at 6:59 the voice/face dan uses when he says “these soft knees. woowwwww.” at 9:07 when dan asks, “what is my life? why do i keep agreeing to these stupid videos? … do you deserve this?” and then at the end, phil saying “the things we do for you guys” and promoting dan’s channel, with dan quickly reassuring people his content is “not like this.” there are just these threads of self-consciousness and self-awareness that i don’t think they were fully able to shake, and an awareness specifically that this video seems/feels a lot like pandering, or at least specifically responding to something that was so vehemently requested by the audience and that they’re pretty clearly doing it just to “give the people what they want” (even though of course they ended up appearing to love it and have so much fun with it). this whole aspect of video-making for an audience is always going to be a tricky one for them, because they both pride themselves on originality and creativity and a so-called quality threshold and all that other bullshit, so choosing to make a video that is such a fervent fan request and that doesn’t involve the same creative energy that they’d normally want probably makes them somewhat uncomfortable (esp if that video is one where they have to literally dress up as a popular fan fantasy and touch each other a lot). that’s why it was so particularly interesting to me to hear phil say “well we’re on my channel there’s no integrity here,” because from *our* perspective it’s true that phil seems to care less about the quality threshold that dan talks about, and that he’s happy to put up fluff content (with dan) quite frequently whether it be a phil is not on fire or a day in the life or a baking vid or whatever else. phil’s clearly speaking in amusement and jest when he says his channel has no integrity but undelrying the humor is a clear separation they seem to see between the purpose of their channels and i was surprised to hear it reiterated so directly. this coupled with what we know about phil being more business-minded, having an on-camera presence that seems to be more different from his real self than dan’s, censoring himself, keeping his thoughts somewhat reserved, ,,, there are lots of connections here that i’m seeing but not finding the best words for in this moment. i think what i mean is that phil views his channel as entertainment in the most literal and fundamental way: the purpose is to please the audience, make them feel good and happy, and give them what they want to see. that process doesn’t necessarily require him to put a lot of himself out there. on the flip side dan sees his channel and his content as true artistic endeavors that are representative of who he is, his value as a creator and maybe even as a person since he connects so much of his self-assigned meaning of life to his career. all of this is shit we knew, but. i’ve never heard phil comment so glibly and cavalierly about that divide. the comment felt super important to me.

overall: there’s such a strongly purposive quality to everything dan and phil choose to do. even amongst all of the sensory onslaught of this video, the scenes of dan stroking phil’s arm and phil cooing over dan’s curls and both of them referencing sex and sexual situations so much, it’s this mindfulness, the transparently premeditated nature of it all, that hit me hardest and that i cannot stop thinking about. they’ve made so much progress in such a relatively short space, with their comfort levels and their confidence and their ability to disregard audience perceptions or, if they do regard it, to at least not let it dictate their behavior so damn much. ultimately with a video like this, when so much seems to have shifted, my mind always goes back to the frame-by-frame way in which videos are edited and the consequently frame-by-frame way that dnp watched this video back, looked at every joke they made, every touch they shared, and decided to leave things in as they were. decided to sit and maybe draft a tweet together that very consciously broke down their carefully constructed walls. it all is very deliberate and that matters. this video could definitely in my opinion be remembered as a turning point much like halloween baking if it is followed by more behavior that pushes boundaries, more conversation about defying gender roles and stereotypes, more sexual humor, etc. it was so exciting to watch and i’m so proud of them on so many levels.

(dan and phil pastel edits irl

god, i love boys. tall boys, short boys, skinny boys, curvy boys, chubby boys, buff boys. boys who dye their hair a lot, boys with naturally coloured hair. punk boys, goth boys. boys in flannel shirts, boys in leather jackets. boys who roll their sleeves up. boys in suits! boys in waistcoats! cis boys! trans boys! nb boys! feminine boys, masculine boys! boys who don’t conform to gender roles, boys who do! boys who cook, boys who garden. boys who love video games, boys who read. boys obsessed with music, boys who paint! autistic boys, depressed boys, boys with anxiety, disabled boys! boys who laugh at their own jokes, boys who love to write! boys are magical! boys are wonderful! i love boys!

Dating Chanyeol Would Include

• Dating Chanyeol would be crazy.

• he would be so nervous to ask you out. But he’ll keep on pretending that he isn’t.

• when you say yes he will be the happiest man alive

• expect phone calls at 1 am

• non stop teasing

• being the loudest couple

• getting cockblocked from the other members

• him surprising you randomly with gifts just to see your smile

• you always teasing him on how cute his ears make him look

• him randomly taking you out claiming it as a date

• traveling to random places

• couple clothes and shoes

• cute couple selcas (selfies)

• playing pranks on the other members

• being in his v live videos

• doing couple challenges

• him posting pictures of you on his instagram

• good night and morning texts

• lots of cuddles

• rough sex

• trying new food

• you reading him to sleep with your favorite books

• him singing you to sleep

• going to arcades a lot

• laughing over random things

• causing the members to get annoyed

• lots of inside jokes

• both of you taking weird pictures of each other

• him coming back to apologize when you two get into an argument

• him making you feel better about yourself

• cute little kisses in public mostly hand holding though

• but really passionate ones at home when no one’s around

• listening to music together

• him making songs about you

• there would not be any second when he isn’t saying a corny joke or pickup line

• “hey babe are you from Tennessee?”

• “not again Chanyeol”

• he loves making you smile especially when you listen to his songs

• he’ll be a major fanboy of yours

• you two will go on random shopping sprees

• probably even start playing hide and seek inside the store

• he would adopt a puppy for both of you

• video game nights with him

• he would make breakfast for you

• you stealing his t shirt

• him saying “i love you” to you every time he gets a chance

• he would show you off to everyone

• he’ll get whiny when you don’t pay attention to him

• sometimes even become a bit possessive but he knows how to keep his cool

• midnight walks

• stupid nickname

• he’ll ask you random questions

• “will you still love me if I’m bald?”

• you two roasting everyone

• he’s high key whipped

• he would do anything for you

• daddy kink

• he would show you off to everyone

• small karaoke dates

• sending cute snapchat filters

• him just listening to you about your day

• overall Chanyeol would be the most cutest and kindest boyfriend he’ll love you more than anything. He’ll cherish you and give you the love you deserve.

Originally posted by dulcetyeoll

SPEEDPAINT VIDEO - youtu.be/VeEHnWx1f8c


Once in a lifetime
There’s a chance that we’d change everything
Follow footsteps from the past
And I can’t help but wonder
If this world is sacred to me
- Sacred Woods, Varien

You know I love my Whiteout :3
She will forever be in my heart.

Whiteout is a Nightwing/Icewing Hybrid

Hope you like

Art copyrights to me
Wings of Fire copyrights to Tui T. Sutherland

Living with Junmyeon

Originally posted by dazzlingkai

  • Junmyeon would be the most caring and kind boyfriend ever + living with him would make everything ten times better
  • Him letting you sleep till noon
  • “Why didn’t you wake me up?”
  • “You looked so cute and comfy, I just couldn’t”
  • Him sneaking into the shower while you’re in
  • Him cooking shirtless
  • Him feeding you
  • You fighting over which movie to watch
  • “We watched star wars’ last episode like 50 times!”
  • “Let’s make it 51 then”
  • The boys visiting you often
  • You making food for them.
  • “Do we have two moms now?”
  • Adopting pets together
  • You laying down on his chest 7/24
  • You wearing his t-shirts as pjs.
  • “Can you do push ups when I’m on you?”
  • Playing video games together
  • You choosing his outfits
  • Going to the supermarket together
  • Him buying tons of chocolate and candy
  • Neck kisses 7/24
  • He would love to pleasure you in every way and any where possible
  • You would have sex in every single room
  • Living room
  • Kitchen
  • Laundry room?
  • Taking couple selfies in bed
  • He would try to do your makeup
  • Making cookies together
  • “Give some to your members”
  • “But you made them for me…”
  • Sehun staying over because he missed his roommate 
  • “You said roommates for life but I see you have a new roommate…”
  • “Sehun, she’s my girlfriend!”
  • “Well, you can take him whenever you want, I don’t care.”
  • Jamming to songs together
Escape: the medical school years

The phone rang at 12:30 a.m.  Six thirty p.m. in Chicago.  

“Tell me everything,” the voice rasped.

“It’s fine, lad.  I said so in my text.  I was right there.  He didna ken what hit him,” the old man chuckled.

“Did Claire see ye?”  Jamie’s voice was vibrating with anger. 

“No, mac mo charaid,” the old man smiled.  “Yer wife was caperin’ about tryin’ to avoid the puddles, taking the long way by path to the car. I streaked across the grass and had time to open the door before she lifted her head in the rain. She missed the whole thing.” 

There was a long pause on the other end.  The line crackled across the ocean.

“I owe ye, mo sheann charaid.”

Claire’s least favourite class was immunology. Some days it was incredibly boring to her.  Today was that day.  Her phone vibrated and she welcomed the distraction.  Turning it over she unlocked it with her pass code, and looked at it.


She hit the little yellow button and gasped.  Holding the phone to her chest she blushed furiously.  Damn you, James Fraser.  She giggled.  She hid the phone under the long table and hit the replay button.  God he was beautiful. He showed just enough of his naked body without exposing himself.  Tease

She took a shot of her notes, then captioned it, “trying to concentrate, thanks.” 

The phone vibrated again.  She dared not look.  Dammit, she couldn’t help it.  He didn’t disappoint.

“Concentrate on this,” he had typed.  Lying back in bed, raised eyebrow, half smirk.  She hugged the phone again.  It was what? Two o’clock in the morning in Chicago?  

Are you drunk? she wrote.  

Maybe, he wrote back.

Claire had an idea.  An awkward one, but an idea.  Pulling out the bottom of her t-shirt she took a couple of pictures.  Not quite…. She tried again.  Bingo. She sent the snap back.  And waited.

It didn’t take long before the ‘screenshot’ notification popped up.  

She giggled, and decided to send one last message.  She held the button, and took a video.  “I miss you, James Fraser. I love you, and I’ll call you later. Good night, my love. Wish I was there.” she whispered, and blew a kiss.  Pressing send she tucked her phone away, and tried to concentrate once more.

Jamie watched the video, smiling, then sat bolt upright in bed.  No. No fucking way. 

He watched it again, focusing on the background this time.  There he was. Horrocks.  Off to her left, behind her.  Horrocks, sporting a very black eye, and a bruise on his neck.  

Horrocks.  Looking at Claire with a mixture of anger and jealousy that made his blood run cold.  

He watched her in class.  All the time. She was so bloody beautiful. Naturally beautiful, and sexy. The worst part was she didn’t even try. She had no idea of the effect she had on men.  Those brown eyes, and curly hair couldn’t help but make most men think of dark nights and tangled sheets.  She was smart, with a sharp wit, and a wicked tongue.  His mind swirled every day conjuring ways to get her alone.  If he could just spend some time with her, flirt a bit, see if he could break through.  He’d tempted women before.  Married, engaged, dating, it didn’t matter.  He was charming, and fairly good looking.  But Claire would be a challenge.  Newly married, she was still in the honeymoon phase.  Ah, well, he liked a challenge.  He hated men like Fraser.  Good looking bastards born into money always getting women like Claire.  He was the son of a blue collar worker from Northern Ireland with little money.  He was making okay grades, but the luck of the Irish gave him a study group that included three of the smartest people in his year.  Claire being gorgeous was an added bonus. The three of them were so sanctimonious, so serious.  He wanted to be a doctor just for the prestige of it.  Just so he could go back to his hometown and be lauded over.  It wasn’t to save people, to help humanity. Fuck humanity. Humanity never served him, living without all his life.  He wanted what men like Fraser had…a posh flat that he could renovate into something even better.  To have a woman like Claire on his arm and in his bed.  He’d have that one day. But he wanted Claire now.  That little exchange he witnessed told him all he needed to know.  Fraser was out of town.  The time to strike was now.

“Dinna leave the flat, Alec.  And keep an eye.  Stay parked outside.  Tell her she needs to text ye when she’s comin’ out, so ye ken if he’s kept her behind. And –“

“Trust me, Jamie, lad,” the old man cut him off.  Alec wished Jamie wouldn’t worry so much.  He’d proved he could take care of her, didn’t he?

“I do.  It’s him I dinna trust. Not as far as I can spit.  A Dhia, Alec. If anythin’ were to happen…”  

Alec was conscious of the conversation he’d had earlier in the day as they drove up to Horrocks’ flat for the study session. He kept a keen eye out for Joe Abernathy’s vehicle, as described by Jamie.  As yet, he didn’t see it.  

“Here, Alec.  I’ll get out here.”  Claire started to gather the bag at her feet.  

“Claire, I’ll no’ be droppin’ ye off until I see that yer other friends are here.”  

Claire was surprised by Alec’s tone.  He normally didn’t speak to her like that.  Plus, he always called her ‘ma’am’.  She looked at him as twilight began to darken the interior of the car.  “What?” she said.  

“I said, I’ll no’ be droppin’ ye off until I ken yer whole group is here.”  Claire watched as Alec’s eyes darted to and fro, taking in every vehicle, all his surroundings.  As nice as he was, she didn’t know much about him.  Seems still waters ran deep.  

He pulled around to the back of the building.  Still nothing. “Ma’am. Would ye do me a wee favour?” He gave her a glance and she nodded. His lighter tone was back.  He really was a puzzle.  “Text one of yer friends for me, please. See where they are?  Maybe just runnin’ late is all.”

“I’ll do you one better,” she said, and pulled out her phone to give Joe a quick call.  He answered right away.  

“Hi!” Claire said.  “Are you upstairs at Robert’s?”

She listened for a minute, and then her head swiveled sharply toward Alec.  He slowed the car and stopped at the corner.  “I see.  So where are you and Fiona now, then?”  Another pause.  

“Yes.  Okay. I’ll be there soon.”  She pushed the button on her cell to disconnect the call.

“Weel, Ma’am?”  Alec raised an eyebrow.  

Claire had to smile, just a little.  Must be a damn Scottish trait, that eyebrow. It’s how they say I told you so.

“Apparently Robert sent out a group text saying he wasn’t feeling well and had to cancel.”  She pulled up her texts and starting going through them all.  He waited patiently for her to figure out what he’d suspected ten minutes ago.  

She looked at Alec.  “I never got it.  Joe said he answered the group text that he and Fiona were meeting anyway, but I never got that one either.”

Alec kept his voice level.  Conversational, so he didn’t scare her.  “So, where to then?”  

“Campus,” she said, distracted.  “They’re at the pizza place on the corner because Joe got hungry.”  She stared out into the falling darkness that was starting to surround Edinburgh. The cold chill she got the night at the library returned.  It didn’t make sense.  Surely, it was just an oversight.  

Horrocks watched the Range Rover from his second story window as it slid past his building for the third time.  Hands clenched into fists, he watched his carefully made plans crumble before his eyes.  The driver was the problem. He knew it now.   As hard as it was to believe that the old man took him down the other night, there was no other explanation for it.  And fuck Joe Abernathy.  He was always checking in with Claire.  He was sure Joe threw a wrench in the plans, as well.  

As he watched the car turn off his street, he made a decision.

Thursday was the one night that Claire gave herself off.  Thursday night she and Jamie always had dinner together and just relaxed.  With him away she decided to catch up on chores. She changed into sweat pants and one of Jamie’s long sleeved Scottish rugby team shirts that was way too big on her, but made her feel surrounded by him.  Smelled like him, too.  She was just throwing a load of laundry in the washer when the doorbell rang. 

What the hell?  She walked over to the door and peered through the eye hole. 

She stepped back, fast.

What the hell was he doing here?  Her first thought was to pretend she wasn’t home. But the lights were on.

The bell rang again and she jumped. Dammit.  Taking a deep breath she opened the door, but left the chain on.

“Robert.  What’s up?”  Claire kept her voice cool.

Horrocks cocked his head to the side and raised his eyebrows.  “Did you not see it was me?”  He waved a hand at the peep hole.

“Well, yes, but I wasn’t expecting you.  Is something wrong?”  

He stood there in his denim jacket and jeans, entirely too close to the door.  He was tall, but not as tall as Jamie.  He wasn’t as big either, yet still intimidating to a woman of her size.  His longish hair and scruffy beard made him look unkempt, but it was the facial bruises that were the most frightening, really. Then he started speaking, and his soft Irish lilt made him seem less intense.  

“I wanted to apologize for yesterday’s mix up. I had such a migraine and Fiona told me today I’d left you off the group chat.  I didn’t mean to, Claire.  I’m sorry I caused you such inconvenience.”  His icy blue eyes stayed steady on hers. He sounded sincere. But, those eyes.  They were so cold compared to the warmth in Jamie’s sky blue ones.  

“It’s fine. But you needn’t come all the way over here to apologize.”

“Actually, I was hoping to cram in a bit of a study with you. Since I missed last night.  If you’re free?” he stammered.  “Joe was busy tonight, and Fiona didn’t answer my text so…I took a chance.  Should I go?”  He took a step toward the stairs, hesitating. Waiting. 

Claire warred with herself.  Jamie would be furious.  But how to refuse? And with what excuse?  She closed the door gently, and paused.  Taking a deep breath she took down the chain.

“Two hours,” she said, in her best no nonsense nursing voice.  “Then I have to get to bed”

Horrocks smiled.  Just what I was thinking.  

autistic laura kinney :O (spoilers ahead!)

i just saw logan and a lot of the things she did really resonated with me, an autistic person, and the variation between her behaviors and her friends seemed to indicate that these were more than just a product of her trauma

  • she’s nonverbal for a good part of the movie. she can verbally communicate her negative feelings like fear, anger, and discomfort by hissing and growling and shouting
    • even when she is verbal, her sentences are kind of fragmented and she doesn’t speak often. this could be considered being semi-verbal
  • the scene at the farm with charles and logan was really important to me, charles acknowledging that even though she isn’t talking, she is communicating, if you are willing to listen. and you don’t have to talk down to a nonverbal person, you can treat them like any other person
  • she does stim a lot
    • her ball is a stim toy, she’s very distressed when she doesn’t have it and in the second scene she’s in, we see her bouncing it over and over again
    • also, the gas station horse ride, logan says “okay, but this is your last ride” implying she rode it repeatedly. also, when it stops and she can’t get it to start again, she gets really panicked and upset
    • and maybe petting the horses could count, because i know petting soft things is a calming stim for me
    • she has some self destructive behaviors that could be considered a stim, i.e. in the video where she cut her arm and watched it heal repeatedly
  • speaking of horses, they could definitely be considered a special interest
    • she loves the horse ride, she gets horse figure and sleeps holding onto it, she fixates on the horse t shirt until charles and logan buy it for her, she fixates on the horses on the highway
  • this isn’t really evidence, but the farm scene where charles said he ran a school for kids with special needs also made me happy esp. considering that being a mutant can be considered an allegory for being neurodivergent (among other things mutations could be an allegory for)
  • she’s a messy eater. she holds her utensils weird and prefers to just eat with her hands until logan tells her to stop
  • she also echoes a line from the movie “shane” which she saw earlier in the movie, at the end as a way to communicate how she was feeling. it probably wasn’t technically a “contextually appropriate” quote, but she used it to convey something she couldn’t put into her own words

that’s all i can think of rn because i’ve only seen logan once but i was really excited and needed to make this post!!