i love my sammiches

The Signs as Things My Best Friend Says

Aries: “You fricken parasite”

Taurus: “I have to poop where’s my phone?”

Gemini: “YOU’RE GOING ON A DATE WITH A RUBBER TOE?”

Cancer: “ARE YOU AS TALL AS HUKE LEMMINGS?!”

Leo: “See my foot? It’s going up your butt.”

Virgo: “Yes, Pen. That’s my boob.”

Libra: “Suck my booty Judy”

Scorpio: “I’m gonna go Brandon Rogers on your booty”

Capricorn: *singing I Love Candy* “I Love Candy- with my peanut butter sammiches”

Aquarius: “I did it. I took a shower.”

Pisces: “No you cheese cracker come back here.”

kevinkhatchadourian  asked:

never ever fucking add an irrelevant comment on my graphics ever again

Wow… I gotta say Jess, I really would like to think little of you for your unnecessary belligerence, but I’m so genuinely impressed that you elected to threaten me to my face rather than firing anon hate at me that I just can’t. Well done sir or madam. That impresses me so much that had you chosen to approach me in a reasonable way and asked me politely to remove your post from my blog I would have happily done so out of respect for you even though I’m under no obligation to do so.

I know the post you are referring to, and I have to say I find it interesting that you would add a qualifier like ‘irrelevant’ to the sort of comments I’m permitted to leave. What qualifies as a relevant comment exactly? Even though my addition was meant as a harmless joke, I think it was relevant in context of the post itself.

The graphic (which is beautiful btw I envy your mad photoshop skills immensely) is titled “Avengers Assemble” and depicts five of the six Avengers portrayed in the 2012 film as well as the main antagonist Loki, and below it is one of the more well known taglines from the movie:

“There was an idea to bring together a group of remarkable people, so when we needed them, they could fight the battles that we never could." 

Now I’m not the smartest cookie out there, but I do feel that (jokingly) pointing out that one of the actual avengers was left out in favor of the villain in a post ABOUT the avengers and what a ‘remarkable group of people they are’ is quite relevant to the subject matter. I was simply making light of the fact that our poor downtrodden archer is perpetually left out in both the comics and MCU alike no matter how hard he tries, because if I couldn’t joke about it, I’d probably be weeping bitter nerd tears into my cheerios about how little acknowledgement and appreciation Clint Barton gets as I type this.

So yeah. While my comment was silly and meant to get a few laughs at one of my favorite character’s expense, it was relevant. Now if I had added a comment about my deep love of grilled cheese sammiches or started off on a rant about the futility of making my bed in the morning when I’m just going to mess it up again the following night by getting in it, THAT would be grounds for accusing me of adding something irrelevant to your beautiful (again i have to stress how beautiful that graphic is because it is gorgeous omgee) post.

So Jess, instead of being upset and cowering in my blankies because you said a swear at me and reporting you to the tumblr powers that be for threatening me, I will offer you a couple tidbits of friendly advice, one blogger to another:

  1. Threatening strangers over the internet makes you look like a cotton-headed-ninny-muffin
  2. Posting your work on a public forum like tumblr is tantamount to throwing your naked baby to a pack of ravenous wolves. If you want to control what people do or do not say about the things you post, well… You can’t really. Trust me, I’ve had enough of my original art/writing commented on, used out of context, stolen and reposted to be intimately familiar with this truth of the internet. You don’t want your baby getting torn apart? Don’t expose it to the wild animals roving these unhallowed realms.
  3. Being polite can get you a long way. I have no reason to apologize for the way I conduct myself on my own personal blog, and no reason to remove that post. But if you had come to me and talked to me like a decent human, asked me to take the post/my commentary down because it just breaks your little heart all to pieces, I would have done it. I probably would’ve fangirled all over you too because honestly that work of yours was just beautiful and if I didn’t think so I wouldn’t have put it on my blog for others to see.

Now to Jess and all my lovely followers out there, I hope you have a gorgeous day and if it isn’t, don’t let it get you down cuz you’re all fantastic and I’m rooting for you. *all the tackle-hugs*