i love jack

Hanzo’s Test

Samurai Bravo/McHanzo Crossover

Jack: Johnny, I’m ba-

*Johnny and Jesse are throwing around an egg*

Jack: Uh, McCree-san, what are you doing?

McCree: Just tossing around this egg Hanzo gave me to take care of.

*He returns to throw the egg to Johnny*

*Jack stands still in his place, unimpressed*

Jack: …Don’t you think it might break?

McCree: Yeah, uh, well… We just thought we’d had some fun with it before I threw it at somebody.

*Continues throwing it*

Jack: *sighs* You are such a moron. You’re gonna fail Hanzo’s test.

McCree: *stops* Huh? What test?

Jack: I’m not supposed to say anything but Hanzo is testing you to see if you’re ready to have children with him.

McCree: *surprised* Oh, my God, are ya serious?

*Jack nods*

McCree: Do ya think I reaaally have a chance?

Jack: Not a good one, You’ve already failed two tests and you’re about to fail the third. That egg *points to the egg in Johnny’s hand* is a test of your parenting ability.

*McCree stares at him, completely petrified*

McCree: So… what you’re saying is if I break THAT egg… then I fail the test, and lose my beautiful darlin’ sweet lil’ honeybee, my cute baby dragon that I love more than anything in the world?

Jack: …Yes.

*McCree looks at Johnny*

McCree: Come on Johnny, give me the egg.

Johnny: What? Oh, alright. Catch.

*Stretches his arm quickly and the egg flies up to crash into the wall*

Jack: …Oh

McCree:*SILENT SCREAM*

Originally posted by expertinawkward

Johnny: Uhhh… Whoops… *shrinks his shoulders* I mean… HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I have such mixed feelings about “Something Borrowed”

Because there are all the usual frustrations: Gwen looking at Jack like she’s in love with him, Gwen kissing Jack, Jack being kind of absent and dismissive… all those things and definitely more if I think about it.

But there’s also things about it that I genuinely LOVE.

Ianto buying the dress? Love.

Jack and Ianto talking about measuring? Love.

Tosh and Owen dancing together, even if we didn’t see it? Love.

The entire team being supportive of Gwen and letting her have her wedding? Love.

Ianto and Owen’s exchange in the car with Jack? Love.

Gwen marrying Rhys? Love.

Rhys in general? Love.

Jack and Ianto dancing together? LoveLoveLove.

jack as a witch in modern aus to ~replace~ biotic powers

her only constant growing up is herself, her own energy, and she learns to use that to deal with unstable situations, to curse those that do her wrong

having to practice in secret, whether she has one home or several foster families: choosing jewelry with crystals, using the necklaces as pendulums; divining with an old deck of playing cards she thinks was from her birth mother; carefully taking small amounts of spices from the kitchen for spells, lying and saying the bag someone finds is full of weed and not the ingredients to an anti-anxiety spell she has to cast almost every day

she goes camping once, and stays up all night watching and tending to the fire, feeling a connection to it, putting energy into dried leaves once everyone else is asleep and letting it burn away her anger one leaf at a time

if she gets piercings, enchanting her earrings/etc and choosing them based on color associations

going to the beach for the first time in high school, when her life has reached semi-stability, and being completely taken in by the sea; being almost in a trance as she feels all the energy in it, and how it calls out to her. taking some seawater home with her, and sand as well, even though she’s never felt any connection to any kind of earth before. she manages to find one small seashell on the well-traveled beach, and treasures it once she’s back home

many of her tattoos are sigils, some she made herself and some old ones she found in research that she could feel the power in. when she doesn’t need one anymore she uses it as a base for another one, and the patterns on her skin grow

she babysits shepard and [LI of choice]’s kid(s) at some point, and one of them calls for her after going to bed because they think there’s a monster or ghost in their room; a common complaint she was told, but once she enters the room she can definitely feel something, and shepard’s kid even points to the corner of the room jack sensed something in

‘alright kid, let’s do some magic to make the sucker go away and leave you alone’ she tells them, and takes them to the kitchen to make some herb water, which they put into a spray bottle ‘borrowed’ from the shelf by the indoor plants before going back to the bedroom, and jack starts to silently cleanse the room and ward it as she shows the kid how to use the spray bottle to get rid of anything that comes to bother them in the future

jack tells shep and [LI] about it when they get home and they’re like ‘???? if it makes them stop worrying about it thank you but also what the fuck jack’ and she just grins and says ‘don’t worry, i didn’t summon a demon or anything. and i’ll save blood magic for when they’re older’

JACK AS A WITCH  (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧ *:・゚✧ *:・゚✧ *:・゚✧