i love how it's written

frostedej  asked:

Draco using the toaster. Poptarts fly out. Draco ends up on top of something and stays there till Harry comes home.

“Don’t move, Potter!”

“Er– what?” Harry had just come home and had been about to step into the kitchen when he heard his boyfriend’s anxious directive.

“I said, don’t move! The second you move, that awful muggle contraption you insisted on buying will attack. Trust me. I’ve already become its victim.”

“What are you even–” Harry cut himself off as, rounding the corner, he caught sight of Draco lying very still on top of the island in the center of their kitchen. He was staring intently across the room at the shiny red toaster, from which protruded two garishly pink–

“Are those Pop Tarts?” Harry asked incredulously. He had no idea where Draco could have possibly come by the sugar-filled American snacks. Nor why Draco, who was still suspicious of all things Muggle, might have considered actually eating one.

“I said not to move, Potter!!”

Harry couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled up at Draco’s ridiculousness. He was still laying perfectly still on the counter. “What happened?”

“Stop walking at it! It’s vicious! I put in one of those awful-looking things, and then I pushed down on the little black part just like you showed me. And I stood there and waited! And waited! And the inside started to change colours—and I think Weasley must have convinced it to support the Canons because it was hideously orange—but no matter how long I stared, nothing was happening! So I moved to get my wand and then BANG! The THINGS flew out and right for my face. My face, Potter. And if you don’t cease your laughter right this minute I swear–”

Sorry, sorry!” Harry gasped, forcing himself to take the situation seriously. “And how did you end up on the island?”

“Well… I don’t really remember. But the time I realised what was happening, I was already laying here, and I didn’t want to risk moving again.”

“Right,” Harry said. “Well, as you can see, I’m moving and am miraculously unscathed by the things. The toaster is perfectly safe.”

Draco looked highly suspicious, but still somehow found the courage to sit up and slip off the counter. “I want that thing out of our house, Potter! If you think it’s so safe, I suppose you won’t mind if I just leave you to defeat it on your own.”

With that, Draco turned up his nose and stomped out of the kitchen. Probably going off to check for wounds, Harry thought as his lips turned up into an amused smile. 

He was just making his way over to unplug the toaster—Draco’s word was all but law, so he had no choice but to get rid of it now—when his cell phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Harry, mate!” It was Ron. “Did Malfoy use the toaster yet?” He sounded full of anticipation.

“The…” Harry sighed as he realised that his boyfriend might not be so ridiculous after all. “Ron. What did you do?”

Harry could somehow hear Ron’s grin over the phone. “Oh, you know. Nothing much. Charmed it to turn orange when he tries to use it. Harmless.”

“That’s all?”

“Well… George did say there might be a few… side effects—”

“Side effects like it attacking my boyfriend’s face?”

Ron laughed shamelessly. “Oh, Merlin, they went for his face?! Oh that’s priceless!”

“Ron! You can’t do that! You know he doesn’t understand Muggle things! How did you get him to try it out anyway?”

“Oh, it was easy! Just gave him some of those Pop Tart things and told him they were your favourite snack,” Ron answered offhand.

Harry’s heart clenched unexpectedly with a wave of affection for his boyfriend. Which was quickly followed by a wave of guilt for laughing at him after all he’d tried to do was make Harry what he’d thought was his favourite snack.

“Ron, I’ve got to go. And you two need to stop your ridiculous prank war. You know if you really do hurt Draco’s face, I’ll never be able to forgive you.”

Ron made a gagging noise. “Gross, mate. Go be a champion for Malfoy’s face somewhere else. I’ll stop hexing your toaster when he stops confunding me every time I go to the bathroom at work.”

Harry smiled. “Fair enough. I’ll see what I can do.”

He hung up the phone and walked over to the toaster, unplugging it and shoving it into a plastic bag. Then he went to find his boyfriend, who was reclining on the sofa reading a copy of Witch Weekly, which Harry was very aware by now was definitely also for Wizards, Potter.

Harry quirked the corner of his mouth and held up the sack full of offensive appliance. “I thought I could go by Ron’s tomorrow on my lunch break to see about dropping this off and charming it to look like his old toaster?” he tried.

And succeeded. Draco’s face broke into a very satisfied grin. “This is why I love you, Potter.”

Harry’s grin developed into a full-on smile. He plopped down on the sofa, held up the sad excuse for a pastry he had taken from the toaster and offered, heedless of Draco’s increasingly disapproving expression, “Pop Tart?”

i just.. . can’t get over sign of the times. there is so much feeling in it - hope, desperation, strength, vulnerability, pain, love, bravery - and all of it is so palpable, i feel like i can taste it in the air while the song’s playing. he pulls you in at the very first note and tangles you into his soul with every note after that. the energy in his voice just. it washes over you, wave after wave, like an ocean of electricity and emotion. 

Hidden Behind Straightened Hair

Hidden Behind Straightened Hair | The fives times Dan’s hair was used as a joke to hide his insecurity about his sexuality, and the one time it wasn’t.| Phan | PG-13 | Homophobia, Bi-Erasure, 2012 Scenario’s, Curly hair/Straight jokes | 5,304 Words

Massive thank you to @ineverhadmyinternetphase​ for quite literally letting me force her to read over my shoulder the entire time I worked on this, and her endless support of both my take on 2012 events, and bi-erasure.

Honestly guys, this is the thing I am currently the most proud of ever having written, so please let me know what you think <3 I’m literally shaking as I post this. 

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4

“On a night like this, a man might believe anything’s possible.”

Man sometimes I just think about how mad it is that Buffy delivers one of the most painful, dramatic episodes/reveals in song form. Like wtf Joss get it together. WHY IS THIS EPISODE SO GOOD. IT HAS NO RIGHT.

Truth (m)

Warning: Bangtan Sevensome Smut

Word Count: 3,938

A/N: Hey guys! I know I was gone for some time, but I finally came up with a scenario I am proud of! It took me several weeks to write this, so I really hope you guys like it too :)

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9

Adil sends room service up to Toby via Tom, who doesn’t understand why Toby’s so awkward…

8

SAM WINCHESTER MEME:
↳  Favorite Scenes [8/8] (Season 9 Episode 17, Mother’s Little Helper)
“Do you have any idea what souls are worth? What power they hold?”

So, I’m working on a prompt for @lostcauses-noregrets and it involves the “Care to Dance” eruris, but younger, pining Erwin is hard to get right. While I fumbled with the vibe of that drabble, this verse was born. And so technically this goes with “That’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard,” but… it’s so out there I feel weird tagging anyone in it. Consider this gross self-indulgence.

Have a bit of a Robin Hood!Erwin set in the fictional Wild West, my friends?


23. “That’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard.”

[~1.8k, Mature, guns and depictions of violence, blood, Western AU]




Erwin adjusted his suspenders once more in the cloudy mirror and made sure the bolo tie hung straight before flashing Levi a grin over his shoulder.  Levi had glowered at his back the entire time Erwin dressed—slipping his too-long legs into too-tight pants, donning shoes they couldn’t afford and a shirt so white it reminded Levi of bleached skeletons in the desert.


“These are pretty comfortable, actually.  You should try wearing them sometime.”  Erwin’s lips curled into a suggestion and he turned all the way around, playfully snapping the suspenders. 


“Don’t,” Levi snarled. “This is, without a doubt, the worst fucking—” he paused to suck a sticky breath because the tremor in his voice made him sick.  He swallowed.  “Erwin, this is the worst idea I’ve ever heard.  And you’ve had some bad ones.”  


Erwin’s grin pulled wider like the accusation pleased him endlessly and fuck, it probably did.  Levi ignored how good he looked in civilian clothes, keeping his gaze far above the way the trousers pulled taut over Erwin’s thighs.  Levi knew all the little fibers that knitted bodies together—where to stab, where to bruise, what to carve on an animal and what to chuck—and Erwin’s body was made of the same easily torn gristle, nothing more.  Levi told himself that again and again.  


“You’re not even carrying a gun.”  Levi’s hands curled into desperate fists at his side.


“Well Lobov wouldn’t, would he.”


Fuck Lobov.”


Erwin laughed.  “That’s exactly the point.”  His eyes were bright with that manic energy his presence shivered with before a raid.


Levi looked away.  “How am I supposed to protect you if you refuse to protect yourself?”  He could hardly hear himself over the adrenalin flooding his brain, rushing behind his eyes.  He closed his lips against whispering, What if I’m not fast enough, Erwin?  What the fuck then? He’d asked before and he didn’t want to hear Erwin’s answer again.


A warm finger tapped his chin, risking Levi’s gritted teeth, coaxing until Levi was looking at eyes that matched the bolo tie he’d stolen for Erwin two days ago.


“I trust you.”  Erwin’s voice didn’t catch in his chest the way Levi’s did.


“They’ll never buy it.”


“I’m persuasive.”


“You’re a suicidal bastard.”  Levi nudged his face up and squeezed his eyes shut, forehead pressed to Erwin’s lips hard enough to bruise.  He felt Erwin smile.


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march 30th

Jaebum | 1449 words | angst
Jaebum is stuck in a time loop on the day of their two year anniversary.

loosely inspired by jyj’s “in heaven

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archiveofourown.org
inhale, exhale, and reset - mapped - Black Sails [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
By Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Black Sails
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Captain Flint/John Silver, Captain Flint/Thomas Hamilton, Madi/John Silver, Captain Flint/Madi/John Silver, Captain Flint & Madi (Black Sails), Captain Flint/Thomas Hamilton/Madi/John Silver
Characters: Captain Flint (Black Sails), Thomas Hamilton, John Silver, Madi (Black Sails)
Additional Tags: Post-Series, Fix-It, Post-Finale, Polyamory, Anal Sex, Reconciliation, First Kiss, First Time, Treasure Island? What Treasure Island?, Reunions
Summary:

After James is reunited with Thomas, he continues to watch more than one point in space at the same time.

Unpopular Opinion

I hate Gabelena.

It’s so stereotypical it makes me gag.

3

i’m sorry the only thing left you can taste is bitter defeat

anonymous asked:

Did you watch the legend of Korra? And did you think it was good?

I did! But… only like the first season and maybe half of season 2? 

I… I dunno what it was about tlok, but I didn’t like it as much as atla? I really really wanted to, I had high expectations for it!! And season 1 was amazinggg, but I got bored real fast in the middle of watching season 2? 

I DON’T KNOWWW

anonymous asked:

Wait if u have a lot of fics you want to read do u think u could rec some? I'm lost for what voltron fics to read and I want to start somewhere (I'm good for every ship but shidge honestly) thanks in advance!

*claps hands together*

OKAY LISTEN UP

A large portion of it is gonna be Klance cause i haven’t really found any other ones that I thought were interesting. Even being a multishipper, you still can’t find good ones of other ships besides the most popular ;w;

I’m also gonna give you the ones I have read cause I don’t wanna give you a fic rec and have you go in blindly not knowing what to expect from one of the fics.

Chances are this is gonna get long so imma cut it right here

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shinyglaceonice  asked:

Honestly this blog is the most relatable. I also love how it's written out kinda like a welcome to Night Vale episode.

Thank you!! In retrospect they’re definitely an influence on my style, but that was never my intention! I basically just morphed into an episode of Night Vale as written by John Mulaney somewhere along the way