Phil’s creepshots of Dan: Aesthetic, cute boyfriend shots, moving out pics, couple goals, probably going to be printed off and put into a photo album that they can look at with their 3 children and 2 dogs uvu
Dan’s creepshots of Phil: Rat!! Cereal theiving scoundral!! Look at this dweeb locked out of his family’s house while his mother and I enjoy mousse in the next room and laugh!!
Cheryl loved Jason. What was she meant to do at his funeral, not cry? And yeah Jason was on the football team but Cheryl was at every game too doing as much to help the Bull Dogs win as he did. Also she has a 4.0 grade point average. If there’s one thing I’ve learned being in Cheryl’s class it’s don’t underestimate her. And don’t bet against her.
Hi, my name is Vincent. I’m moving to a small apartment and can’t take my 10 month old German Shepherd, Sasha, with me. She enjoys running and playing but she won’t be happy confined in a concrete jungle. My partner, thankfully, owns a large amount of land with other dogs she can socialize with. I believe that’s the best place for her to be. However, getting her to paradise is the hard part. Please, anything is helpful. I want to see Sasha happy with people who love her as much as I do. Selling her on craigslist is sketchy and especially bad for female dogs who are most likely going to be used as breeders and are poorly treated.
My 9yr old sister with autism and downs syndrome will miss her very much, but we need the money to get her to a good home with people we trust. As I said up above, my boyfriend has offered to take her but I need to pay off her expenses before he can take her and I don’t have the money for it. All funds will be used to pay off her expenses and get her to a good home where I’ll still be able to see her. I will be moving by the end of March and need at least $200 for her to go to the home she deserves. Please, please, I don’t want my dog to go to the wrong people. Anything at all will help Sasha live a happy long life with people who will love her and give her the attention she needs.
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Thank you all so much.
- “You eat kitkats like a monster, honestly I don’t think I can love you anymore.”
“At least I know how to cough into my elbow like a civilized being.”
- “Do you ever realize that we act like an old married couple sometimes?”
“We are an old married couple…”
- “Do you know how to cook anything besides ramen?”
“Um… microwave popcorn.”
- “You are so weak when it comes to spicy food.”
“No I’m not.”
“Name 1 spice you enjoy.”
“Pepper counts, right?”
- “I would do anything to prove my love for you.”
“Drink that entire bottle of hot sauce then.” “I don’t love you that much.”
- “Dude, you cry over everything.” “No I don’t.”
“You cried when a fly you called your ‘friend’ flew out of the window, you left open.” “Listen, I just felt really close to Fred.”
“IT WAS A FLY.”
- “Why do we have a dog? We didn’t have a dog before I left.”
“Yeah, well, get with the times. Things change. Ugh, you’re just another old guy who doesn’t wanna accept that the world is changing.”
“1, You’re older than me. 2, You still haven’t told me why we now have a dog.”
- “Hey, do you love me a lot?“
“Enough to give me your garlic bread?”
I saw your post about the you're doing great sweetie meme and I just had this thought and it won't go away what if. In Nassau. There are people that also do that, to flint?? Bc he's the most feared pirate captain but he's also. Really polite? And reserved? So he's interacting w/regular people and he's just his normal slightly awkward self and people just want him to do well and have nice things and he has no idea and I can't stop. Imagining it.
listen……………i love this so much i could cry.
flint has a lot of strange fans in nassau:
the dogs love him because he always carries scraps in his coat. he spoils them like crazy, feeds them when nobody’s watching. there’s a reddish one that likes flint in particular, she trails him around the streets and he looks around over his shoulder in a panic before giving it a fond scratch behind the ears and shooing it away, scowling
the little girls that play behind the tavern love him because he doesn’t speak to them like they’re little girls. they pull at his jacket until he crouches to get to their eye-level and then they very seriously discuss the goings on; “robert pulled me hair yesterday mr. flint” “is that right? and what did you do?” “i told him if he did it again id summon you ta drag him inta the depths” flint goes a bit still at that and she puts her little hand on his shoulder “he’s so stupid he believed me, mr flint, he hasn’t touched me hair since” and flint laughs, and another girl overhears “the boys don’t know how nice you are, please don’t tell them” FLINT SURROUNDED BY A BUNCH OF LITTLE GIRLS THAT ADORE HIM AND AREN’T AFRAID OF HIM! maybe they ask to braid his hair at one point because they’re all fascinated by the color, and he resists a little at first but they crowd around him so he has no chance. oh and also he forgets to undo one so he just has a single braid leading into the bun on his head for days, i’m crying
there’s a street vendor a little ways inland, a man who looks to be a bit too old to still be alive in the 18th century, and he’s half-blind in one eye and he’s got a soft kind face and a workman’s hands and he sells handmade leather goods; flint stops by whenever he can, half the shit he owns he bought from the man, exchanged valuable things he found on prizes for pennies. the man has no idea his best customer is captain flint, they always have lengthy conversations about the weather and flint always walks away from the stand lightly smiling and thinking of padstow
EVERY LOW KEY PERSON IN NASSAU LOVES CAPTAIN JAMES FLINT MCGRAW EVEN IF THEY DON’T KNOW THEY LOVE HIM
@zsaszmatazz tagged me to do the “six movies I can watch any time” meme (LIKE 10 YEARS AGO I’M SORRY) so here goes!
1. Road to El Dorado
Don’t tell me you can’t also watch this whenever. It’s lolzy, it’s feelsy, and it’s the source of one of my three OT3s. If Miguel/Tulio wasn’t allowed to be canon, I’m making Miguel/Chel/Tulio my headcanon dammit. Fight me.
The story is a fantastic adventure every time. The music is amazing, the animation is GORGEOUS. The jokes are funny no matter how many times I hear them. “Stars.” “Holy ship.” “Apparently ‘El Dorado’ is native for GREAT… BIG… ROCK.”
And don’t get me started on the armadillo. Is that thing a spirit guide? A god? Probably. I’m for it.
2. Chicken Run
I consider this one a guilty pleasure. Again, always a funny, fun adventure. Just serious enough to balance out the lolz. And Ginger is one hell of a snarky character. I love that she’s simultaneously mom friend and rebel friend.
Also, it’s that claymation Wallace and Gromit animation, which is just… nifty! I always find myself watching certain characters move, checking out different textures, especially with Babs and her knitting. Just… excellent.
Also, also this:
What can I say about this movie? Well…
I was based on a book written by my favorite author, Neil Gaiman, is a fantastic adventure that addresses the line between magic and non-magic worlds and includes such fun things as evil witches, falling in love, warring princes, falling stars, unicorns, ghosts, and sky pirates in drag (which Neil said he’s pretty sure he didn’t write, but it’s such a good scene you guys).
I am always happy by the end of it. The growing-up story is so good. And Tristan kind of bumbles through it like I totally believe I would were I thrown into a story like that. It’s just… such a satisfyingly complete and fun story, and I love it every single time.
Shut the hell your mouth this is the best villain-to-hero story I know. I am always so proud of Megamind. Like, real talk, how often does our favorite adorable villain get the girl? How often do we get to see the bumbling bad guy actually get a cool-ass happy ending? And the emotional journey he goes on gets just serious enough without killing the funny vibe the whole movie carries.
The writing is tropey, but in a way that totally plays on those tropes while making fun of them. Trope-ception is my favorite trope. And I love, love, LOVE the design choices. This movie is so colorful, and the proportions are so over the top. It’s just a visual salad.
And, as always, the jokes are good no matter what. I don’t think I’ll ever get over, “And I love you, random citizen!” This movie is such a fun time, please go watch it.
5. Strange Magic
Have you heard of this movie? Well, now you have. Please go watch it.
Much like Megamind, Strange Magic got pushed to the back burner by more popular movies coming out at the same time. And that’s just a shame, because it’s just so good.
It’s a jukebox musical with reenactments of all sorts of songs, all of which are brilliant (half the time because Evan Rachel Wood My Queen is singing them, but also Alan Cumming, and sometimes they sing together and I die). The story is predictable, but the characters are what make it for me. They’re fun enough that even though I saw the end coming a mile away, it was nothing but enjoyable watching them get there.
This fandom is also dear to my heart. It’s full of some of the sweetest people with some of the most interesting fan fiction that I’ve ever read. When I think good writing, I think @abutterflyobsession who has made me cry on more than one occasion, and @jaegereska whose lore and OCs add so much to the world beyond the movie.
Major draws: good music, lovely animation, self-confidence story, princess with a sword, SWEET SWEET VENGEANCE, and did I mention singing by Evan Rachel Wood, Alan Cumming, and Kristin Chenoweth? Bruh.
My favorite movie for now and always. Set it at the bottom for full effect. Get ready.
First off, music by David Bowie that is fuckin’ catchy as heck. If you don’t want to at least tap your foot along to ‘Dance Magic Dance’ you’re lying. ‘As the World Falls Down’ was the first song I remember wanting to know the lyrics to.
Side note: If you didn’t think the Fireys were creepy as fuck, you’re also lying.
There has never been so much glitter in one place ever. The visual gags are always funny. Like, there are Bowie faces I still can’t find to this day hidden in the scenery??? The muppets are all adorable because Brian Froud is amazing, and I want a pet goblin. Everything is just so much fun to look at. Don’t even get me started on the ridiculous fantasy fulfillment that is the ballroom scene. I just.
The jokes are always funny because they run on a dry sense of humor like mine. “Well, come on feet.” One I missed for years. “No, that’s the dead end, behind you!” Ha, hubris. “It’s a piece of cake!” Shut up, Sarah…
But you also can’t not love the characters? Like, come on, who doesn’t wanna hug Ludo just a little. And Didymus, the fox knight that rides a fuckin’ tiny dog into battle?? And Hoggle who collects jewelry and pretends to be bitter as hell but cares so much??? Heck off, they’re all awesome.
Fave movie. Always.
Honorable Mention: Big Fish
Added this one because I can watch this any time, but it always makes me cry, so I usually save it for when I need a good cry. (Srsly, @may10baby can vouch, I once tried to explain the end to her and started sobbing in the car).
It’s just such a cool story. We get to see the life of the father as told through his own hyperbolic stories, which include a star-studded cast playing funny scenes in between serious family time. And the end… christ, it’s just such a satisfying ending. Such a good play on storytelling and what it can mean to people. Which, as a writer, means a lot to me.
Also, it’s the only Tim Burton movie I’ve seen that doesn’t look like… that. You know. How Burton movies look. Helena Bonham Carter plays like 3 different people, and none of them are Mrs. Lovett. That’s a feat, honestly.
I’ve said this about a few of these, but please watch this movie.
Author - K (I’m pretty sure J doesn’t really listen to musicals I’m not entirely sure)
so this is something I wrote when kind of tipsy on mango vodka and schloer. but I quite like it and hope you guys too. also, i was tipsy and now so is Evan.
Connor was sitting on his bed, painfully sober after only three beers, while Evan was giggling at the ceiling on the other end. Connor sighed, looking fondly at the other boy, feeling guilty that he has gotten Evan drunk. Yet, he couldn’t let himself feel too bad because he knew that Evan needed this. He needed a distraction, and Connor was putty in this boy’s hands. He would walk across hot coals just to make Evan smile. So getting a few beers into his home while his parents were away was nothing. He pushed himself up off of his bed, getting a baggy shirt and sweats that Evan had left ones of the many other nights he’d stayed there. He was planning to attempt to get Evan into them so he’s reasonably comfortable when he sleeps, but he’s that drunk that it probably wouldn’t matter if he was still in jeans or not. But, when he tried to get Evan’s top off, he went bright red and tried to bat Connor’s hands away.
He spluttered while trying to stop Connor from undressing him. “I have a boyfriend! You’re not allowed to undress me because Connor will get mad and him being mad kind of makes me want to cry.” He continued to ramble, his words slurring slightly. His heart broke slightly at Evan’s statement because Connor knew he was mad quite a lot. But he shook the thoughts away and replaced them with ‘Evan is such a lightweight. Probably because he has never drunk before.’
He let out a deep sigh. “I am your boyfriend, dipshit. I’m trying to get you into pyjamas so you don’t sleep in those shitty blue jeans.” Connor tried to persuade him, but Evan wasn’t having it. He kept waving him off, mumbling about how he wasn’t going to betray Connor. He would have found it adorable if he wasn’t trying to do something. Eventually, Connor gave up and sat next to Evan, laying his head in his hands and yawning, exhaustion suddenly taking over.
After a few minutes of silence, Evan spoke up. “I love Connor.” His chest tightened at Evan’s words. “I love him so much it hurts. Because sometimes I think to myself, ‘if I asked him to list everything he loves, how long would it take him to say himself?’ I’m not even sure if he would and it breaks my heart. I know he isn’t perfect and has done some shitty things, but he is getting better and loads of people don’t see that and treat him like he is some dog that they can provoke until it runs and tries to rip their face off!” Evan had slowly become slightly hysterical, crying about how amazing he feels his boyfriend is. Connor wanted to cry as well. No one had ever spoken so kindly of him. But Connor settled for holding Evan’s hand and saying sweet words to calm him down.
When he had eventually calmed Evan down, Connor squeezed Evan’s hand. “He loves you, too. He worships you and I know he wouldn’t say he loves himself. But that list? Of things he loves? Would be filled with different things about you. He could go on for days about everything he loves about you. The only reason he doesn’t say anything day to day is because he is damaged and doesn’t show any emotions except anger. But I swear to you, he loves you.” Evan smiled warmly, looking at the floor with teary eyes before picking up the pyjamas, and slowly picking himself off the bed and to the bathroom to change.
By the time he returned, Connor was under the duvet waiting for him.When he climbed into bed, he left a decent chunk of space between him and Connor, obviously still drunk enough to think that Connor wasn’t actually Connor. But as soon as he heard Evan’s breathing even out, signalling he was asleep, he slipped an arm around his waist, pulling him closer.
Before he went to sleep himself, he kissed Evan’s shoulder and whispered ‘I love you’.