i looked at him and i saw myself

6

Harrison and I both began to drink and at some point early on I said, “Do you want to see me do an imitation of you?”

Harrison didn’t walk, he swaggered, like John Wayne in slow motion – taking his seemingly bad attitude for a walk. To depict this, I moved out of sight and after a moment reappeared, strolling as he strolled, sauntering my way into whatever fresh hell I found myself. I’d become him, disenchanted Lord Ford, master of all he surveyed.

I hadn’t looked at Harrison yet to see how my portrayal of him was going over – too busy appearing indifferent and impatient with my surroundings. As I continued to portray his inner monologue, I finally let at least one of my eyes slide wearily to his face and saw that he was not only laughing, he was laughing that silent and hard laugh reserved for true enthusiasm. Almost 40 years later, I still think of it as one of the greater moments of my life.

anonymous asked:

dont mind me just reading all ur voltron headcanons they are a gift

well consider me the gift that keeps giving, buddy

  • [keith and lance get hit] hunk: “shiro we have to hurry up and come up with a plan!! that last blast almost… heh…. cost us an arm and a leg”
  • pidge and lance lowkey adopted each other. lance knows, pidge probably doesn’t
    • lance waded through a water fountain to get his weird sister a video game she liked i mean come on
    • meanwhile pidge allegedly finds lance annoying but if anyone actually agrees with her she’s like “no wait only i’m allowed to say that”
    • they’re siblings
  • coran is just. so proud of these little humans and their little primitive brains. did you see how number five hacked that computer princess? look at her tiny synapses firing!!
  • whenever allura has free time she’ll plan out circus routines for the mice
  • “this is keith he’s a little stabby but we love him”
  • the team fights over going on missions with shiro
    • *hunk voice* “when do i get my life changing field trip with shiro”
  • when slav saw the particle barrier technology for the first time he straight up laughed
  • lance: “i need some encouragement. i need to ask myself, ‘what would an apollo astronaut do?’… and well they’d probably drink three whiskey sours, drive their corvette into a launchpad, then fly to the moon in a command module way smaller than my lion. man those guys were cool”

“What if I didn’t care too much? ” he said while looking at her, trying to imagine that she’s someone else. That he’s not asking this question to someone he loves truly—for the fact that he doesn’t want to hurt her. He never wants to cause heartbreak, especially to her. But because he can’t take it any longer, he took a deep breath and continued, “You don’t need to answer me. I just…you know…I just really have to let this out. Because it’s hard. I know you’re not even asking me to care about you this much, you didn’t even ask me to hold you up whenever you feel that you’re about to shatter and fall to the ground. But I care, hell I still care. And you know the only reason why I do. Why I always claim to be—that person who is always on your side—and it doesn’t matter whether you’re on your darkest times or brightest hours. I’ll still be there, to cheer you up when you’re down, and to clap my hands for you, to hug you warmly and to congratulate you every time you achieved something you always wanted.”.

He paused reminiscing all the good and bad times that they were together. He remembered the times she tried pushing him away. But he never left her. Because he knew that time was the moment that she needed him the most.

“Yet now, I wonder. What if I didn’t fall in love with you? Will I still care about you? Will I’m going to be one of those people who left you once they were ignored by you? Will I’m still going to be here—standing firmly next to you? ”. he said. He didn’t wait for her answer, instead he continued saying, “I honestly don’t know what exactly I would do. Because the moment I saw you, I never imagined being away from you. I never saw myself leaving you. I never ever saw myself not caring this much about you. And that’s the reason why—it hurts at the same time.”.

He looked at her just to find her staring back at him. With her eyes so beautiful that the stars weren’t enough to describe the way her eyes shone that night. He slowly grabbed her hands, closing it with his.

And when he looked back at her, both of them have tears in their eyes, as he said “Because the truth is, no matter how hard I try to move my feet miles apart from you, I can’t. I just can’t run away from you.

—  ma.c.a // Love Pushed Me To You

I let a boy tell me what I deserved, and that was the first mistake.
Because when it comes down to it, his words will echo in my head until I believe what he’s saying, even if it isn’t true.
It was a vibrant feeling, the way his hands held mine and the way that my heart beat against his. His words dangled over my head, and every day I tried to capture them from the air. Because there is no feeling like the one when he told me I was beautiful, when he whispered “I think I love you,” like the words surprised him as each one rolled off his lips. And I guess I’m a sucker for being the girl that changes the boy who can’t be changed, being the girl that turns his world from wrong to right. And he made me feel loved when he wept about not wanting to let me go. It made me feel real, it made every word feel palpable. I had changed him, I had turned the boy from stone to life.
But the truth is everybody has their flaws, and every one of his glimmered under the waves, while I tried to avoid them and told myself to just look up at the fucking sky. Look up. Don’t look down. He is perfect, he is beautiful, he is worth your soul and mind.
But they haunted me when my feet dipped into the sand and the shiny rocks pierced my toes. He made me bleed but I tried to let the ocean of him wash it all away. I still smell him on my skin and I get sick at the thought of that lingering scent disappearing, but he told me I was not what I am.
When people saw me for who I am, a strong and genuine person, he cloaked me and covered me and tried to suppress it. He let me believe I didn’t deserve to shine the way I did. He believed I was only meant to shine for him. So I dimmed my light and cut myself up just so he would accept me. He was what I wanted, he was what I needed. I didn’t need the other things, I could sacrifice myself for him. The ocean was too vast and wonderful for me to realize that I was getting bruised and battered under the waves, that his long and careful fingertips ripped my heart apart.
He held me close and told me he wanted me, he told me I was his and he was mine. But every drunken word was laced with fear and jealousy, and I became a consolation prize in the war within himself.
I like to believe I changed this boy, and that our love was epic in every sense of the word. We laughed and we cried and we loved and we loved and we loved. But sometimes the things you love tear you to pieces, and your addictions become your worst enemies.


I let a boy tell me what I deserved, and that was my first mistake.

For a long time, neither of them spoke. Somewhere far beyond the office walls, Harry could hear the sound of voices, students heading down to the Great Hall for an early breakfast, perhaps. It seemed impossible that there could be people in the world who still desired food, who laughed, who neither knew nor cared that Sirius Black was gone forever. […]

“I feel I owe you another explanation, Harry,” said Dumbledore hesitantly. “You may, perhaps, have wondered why I never chose you as a prefect? I must confess … that I rather thought … you had enough responsibility to be going on with.” Harry looked up at him and saw a tear trickling down Dumbledore’s face into his long silver beard.

8

LOIS:  Look, Clark, I know that I got a little thorny when you raised the red flag on A.C.
CLARK:  I was just trying to look out for you.
LOIS:  And I appreciate it.  I’ve just never had someone to help guide me through the shark-infested ocean of romance. … Not that I can’t fend for myself.
CLARK:  You know, I think I was wrong about our friend A.C.

i always get a little miffed when i see apollo refered to as “the only man artemis ever loved” because no he wasn’t there was this dude named orion who accidentally stumbled on her hunting camp one time and she got all “hey fuck off im not having any of your rapey shit” but he was just like “dude wtf no its night time in the forest and youve got a campfire i just want to get warm” and she was like “???? okay?? this is weird and i don’t trust you but whatever” and they got to talking and they became the bestest hunting buddies ever and then apollo showed up like “oh HELL no youre not having your way with my sister” and tried to kill orion but artemis was like “damn it you sunbaked asshole think before you attack do you really think i couldnt have killed this guy on my own if i wanted to? hes cool af okay ima be mad as hell if you hurt him” and apollo was like “oh okay i get it i have to be sneaky about the fact that im a jealous fucknut who wants to kill this dude just because youre hanging out with him instead of me” so he gave orion a dream where he got killed by a fucking 10 foot scorpion and when he woke up there was an actual 10 foot scorpion outside his house so he did what any reasonable motherfucker would do and grabbed his gods damn sword to try and kill it but it was too strong and it pushed him back into the sea so he just goes “fuck this shit ima swim for it” and then apollo went to artemis and was all like “hey i saw this dude rape and kill a girl and i could have killed him myself but i thought youd want to do it” and artemis is all “youre damn right i do” and she shoots an arrow through orion’s face from so far away that his head looked like a tiny dot on the water at which point apollo just starts laughing like “haha lmao you said i couldnt kill him so i got you to do it for me also btw i lied about seeing him do some shit see ya” and fucks off to leave artemis alone with her dead best friend so she does what gods always do when shit goes down and hangs orion in the stars and goes to kill the scorpion but you know apollo didnt like that too much so he tries to send his fuckening scorpion up there to get orion a second time but artemis fuckin swats it and the scorpion ends up on the other fucking end of the sky so it never comes anywhere near him and theyre not even up there during the same months so since orion’s up there trying to hunt down that fucking scorpion and it’s trying to obey apollo and kill him, they just chase each other in circles for all eternity BUT orion got the better end of that deal because his belt is one of the most recognizable asterisms in the sky and i fucking dare you to tell me what scorpio looks like.

Locked Away

By reddit user Pippinacious

Six months. That’s how long almost half of the new hire last when they become social workers. Some will tell you it’s the pay, others will tell you it’s the stress, still others will complain about poor training or case overload or the broken system. But that’s all bullshit. The reason they quit is always the same; the kids.

Keep reading

Beating major d*ck.

Some people just like to use their power to bash people and degrade people publicly. Whenever I encounter these people I like to grasp the situation firmly in hand and beat them down. In this case I give you special piece of crap we shall call D*ck. D*ck is a older guy who has worked for a branch of state law enforcement for many years. He was very vocal about being three years away from full state retirement and about his rank in state gov.

I was working as a contractor doing some I.T. work. We had a large group to move the department forward at least 10 years technology wise. It was all hands on deck to prep computers for the incoming new computers and of course setting up the new ones. In my case as a coder/network grunt I was being ‘borrowed’ and more than happy to help.

D*ck was the only jerk out of at least 300 people I had enjoyably encountered. He complained about anything he could figure to complain about and would go over the departments managers heads to complain. Part of what I was asked to do was inventory their software used, directories mapped, and to copy files to their new network folders. Keep in mind we did a copy of the data and not a move. When new computers arrived the network copy served as a way to making sure the data was backed up before it was cloned over to the new system. D*ck was livid that someone touched his computer and swore we deleted a file we could not find.

I was marched up to his office with my management team and the department’s senior. I promptly found his file on his new system (and on the network). I happened to notice that he had newly installed a newsreader but did not say anything about it. I knew if I called him out on it I would get canned and they would not look into it. Instead I opened the reader while D*ck was bashing me in the hallway to his audience and changed his preferences. Now the files would not delete when they were read or deleted. Keeping in mind this was in the late 90’s and the internet was still a new thing for many. A lot of people would download their porn from newsgroups (usenet) by using a newsreader to download everything new dumped in the selected group (think like a folder). Groups would follow a theme or where supposed to. The reader would put all the pieces together so you could see the images or video and copy them to folders. I was made to apologize  in front of him and marched off in shame. D*ck was really throbbing with all of his smugness.

I was passed off from that project to just doing a rework of some DOS based software. I told my suck up manager that a lot of people were downloading and installing software on their own. My manager clicked that it was work we could be tasked with doing to create billable hours and that he could score suckup points with. This in turn created various email distributions and policy updates. I also point out that we need something about appropriate usage - great! The policy also now highlights that any private use on government equipment is subject to the same rules as fraud - perfect. This helps later because there is NO wiggle room for offenders. In turn my manager was more than pleased with me and treated me golden - hell he even bought me lunch.

I quickly forgot all about D*ck and found myself expanding the list of software that needed to be rewritten by me. This kept me busy and extended my contract. My boss was happy, my agency was happy, and my clients were very happy.

Fast forward few months later. I get back to the office and the bosses are there looking for a coworker. They asked me if I knew anything about d*cks new system and I told them HELL no. They walk off and told me if I saw the coworker to send him over.

When my coworker (who was an employee and not a contractor) returned I told him about the managers, my encounter with Major D*ck and tipped him off about the newsreader. My coworkers eyes lit up and he stood straight like a huge weight had been lifted. It turns out that D*ck once again had senior staff watch the 'stupid idiot’ fix the computer that the “tech broke being incompetent’. Surprise - It turns out it was out of disk space and would not re-start. The tech had to boot from a disk and delete temp files just to boot. In front of everyone the tech points out that one directory was filling the drive with images. Once he had everyone’s attention he then popped open some images. Porn immediately filled the screen including some very sketchy stuff from what I hear.

The tech was ushered out and D*ck lost his job. Instead of putting D*ck into jail they covered asses and terminated him. No job, no power, and pension for you D*CK.

“When I met him I was not looking for love. I wasn’t looking for anything honestly. I wasn’t planning on falling for anyone so suddenly. But as soon as I saw him that was it. I guess things just happened. I found him and I found myself wanting to spend more and more time with him. It was so simple. I think that’s how the best relationships happen. You’re not looking for anything and then all of a sudden you realize; You have something. The only problem is people can fall out of love just as quickly as they can fall in love.”

-s.g // excerpts from a book ill never write #69

2

Tom Holland Imagine: Comic Con

Summary: You and Tom meet at Comic Con while you’re both promoting your new movies

A/N: I saw The Lost City of Z today and almost died because it was so good. It’s literally my favorite book of all time and when I found out Tom was going to play Jack is almost cried.

Warnings: none

————————————————

Tom and the rest of the Spider-Man: Homecoming cast were in the middle of an interview when she first caught his eye. She was dressed in a blue floral dress when he saw her. Tom tried to keep his focus on answering the questions but his attention kept diverting to her smile. Her smile was the most enchanting smile he had ever seen and she had the most kind eyes of anyone he had ever met.

She was crouched next to a little girl and appeared to be singing. Although Tom couldn’t hear her, he knew she had to have the voice of an angel.

“So, Tom, got your eye on anyone?”

Tom snapped his head back over to the interviewer who was smiling at him.

Tom stayed quiet for a moment as he looked at Zendaya for help who simply giggled at the boy in distress.

“Um, I-uh… I don’t know. There’s one girl who I recently saw and thought was beautiful. But I haven’t had the chance to introduce myself to her yet…”

Tom could feel his cheeks heating up as the rest of the cast ooo'ed at his response.

Tom looked up to Harrison who was smirking at him.

Tom turned his gaze back to look for her, but she was gone. Tom felt like he was going to have a panic attack if he didn’t find her soon.

Luckily for him, the interview ended and he had 1 hour before their panel started. 1 hour to find the mystery girl.

Tom frantically looked around the mountains of people for the dark haired girl in the light blue floral dress. Tom prayed to whatever god was up there that he would find her and find her soon.

Tom was abducted from his prayers by a familiar voice calling his name.

He turned his head to see friendly blue eyes looking back him.

“Hey, kid. It’s been a while.” Sebastian said as he smiled sweetly at Tom.

Although they joked about having a rivalry, they were actually quite fond of each other.

“Oh, hey Seb. Sorry, I just saw this girl earlier and I’m trying to find her.”

“Oh? What’d she look like?”

“Ummm… dark hair, kind eyes, beautiful smile, she was wearing a light blue dress with yellow, black and white flowers on it.”

“I think I know who you’re talking about. Her name’s Y/N. She’s the voice of the new Disney princess. She’s probably in the break room, honestly. Or maybe try and find her booth?”

Tom nodded and took off towards the break room.

“Okay, bye, I guess…” Sebastian mumbled as he watched the lovesick boy run away from him.

Tom could hear people yelling his name for pictures, but he ignored all of them. He felt horrible for neglecting his fans, but he had to find her.

Tom finally reached the break room and saw the same beautiful smile from before as she read from a book of fairytales.

Everything felt like slow motion for Tom as he approached where she was sitting.

Tom had normally been good at talking to girls, but as soon as her e/c eyes met his, he felt hopeless.

His throat ran dry and he could hear his heart pounding in his chest while his stomach did cartwheels inside of him. He felt like he was no longer in reality, but placed in a fictional world of romance like in the movies his mom always watches.

Tom suddenly become aware of how much time had passed of him staring when he noticed her smile beginning to drop.

“Hi? Can I help you with something?”

And that was it. Hearing her voice. Her voice was as smooth as velvet and as beautiful as a sunset over an ocean.

Tom swallowed the lump in his voice and counted to three before blurting out a hello.

The beautiful smile returned to her face as she greeted him once again.

Tom’s cheeks heated up again.

“I’m Tom. I uh, I saw you earlier and I-I just, um-”

“He thinks you’re really pretty!”

Tom whipped around to see Sebastian standing at the door smirking, obviously enjoying the torture that the poor boy was in.

“Oh… is that true?”

Tom turned back to look at Y/N with wide eyes. He slowly nodded and felt his cheeks grow warmer if that was even possible.

Y/N smiled up at him before grabbing a notepad from the tables and a pen.

“Well, if that’s the case, maybe when you learn how to speak properly, you can give me a call.”

Y/N handed Tom the piece of paper that contained her phone number.

Tom smile brightly at Y/N before he heard them calling for the Spider-Man Cast to head to their panel.

“Maybe after this is over, I can take you to dinner? Would that be okay?”

“That sounds perfect.”

The Unspoken Game

A/N: So like said before I wasn’t ever going to post this because this was orginally for Chloe who’s been a little ran down lately. So no judgements ! This is a Thomas fic WHO I’VE NEVER WRITTEN ABOUT EVER ! BE PROUD OF ME LOL ! I hope you all enjoy this as much as I know that Chloe did !

Dedicated to: @writing-obrien

Warning: God, the smut tho. I’m just be warned.

Word count: 2714

Originally posted by space-ing-out

Keep reading

Something There

Overview: Four years have passed since the war and you and Draco are now soon to be married. But as his insecurities catch up to him, he begins to wonder why someone like you would ever want to be with a former Death Eater like him. For who could ever learn to love a beast?

Word Count: About 1,400.

Warning(s): Some fluffy fluff.

Note: Draco x Reader Beauty and the Beast retelling loosely based off of “Something There” (see below).


Draco watched as you twirled around the kitchen of the Malfoy Manor, a sterling silver spoon in hand. In a cozy robe and pajamas, he thought you were quite a sight. His favorite sight in the world, nevertheless.

“One more week,” you sang. “That’s seven more days until we’re married.” After placing your dishes in the sink, you sat down at the dining table next to Draco. “Can you imagine?”

“Seeing as we already live together,” said he, gesturing to the vast interior of the manor, “I quite easily can.”

You nudged him with your elbow. “It’s still not the same. Soon, we’ll be Mr. and Mrs. Draco Malfoy.” You paused. “Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

Although he replied with a nod, Draco couldn’t help but frown at the sound of his last name. What was once a word he flaunted about and held to the highest esteem had turned into a scarlet letter after the Second Wizarding War.

He furrowed his eyebrows, dragging his spoon along the rim of his bowl. Soon, you would bear the name Malfoy. Malfoy. A name tarnished and sent to Azkaban and back as nothing more than a patch on his parents’ clothing.

And the more he thought about it, the more Draco realized that wasn’t a burden he wanted to share with you.
__________

A day passed and Draco still had an unsettling feeling in his stomach. It wasn’t uncommon for him to wear long-sleeved shirts, but now he could hardly bare glancing at his Dark Mark.

Is this what being a Malfoy meant?

“Draco,” you said, climbing into the bed as you stared at his back, “what’s the matter?”

He tucked his hand under a pillow. “Nothing, love. Just tired, is all.”

“I don’t believe you.” He felt the mattress shift ever so slightly as you drew nearer to him. “Before all else, Draco, I am your friend. Before being your fiancée, your girlfriend, your anything– I’m still just your best friend.” You peered over at him, his eyes focused on the wall. “So why on earth would you expect me to believe that lie?”

Sighing, Draco turned on his other side to face you, propping himself up on his arm. He noticed the way you scrunched your nose in concern, a wrinkle appearing between your eyebrows.

“Please, tell me what’s wrong, babe,” you pleaded. Your face softened as you examined his tired eyes, bringing your hand to brush against the cold skin of his face. “Is it the wedding? Are we going into this too soon?”

“No, of course not. It’s not–” He took a deep breath, unsure of what he wanted to say. Draco captured your hand in his, pulling it near his chest. He stroked the calloused pad of his thumb against your knuckles absentmindedly. “If I had to describe you in one word, it would be perfection.”

You quirked an eyebrow, unsure of how to react. “I’m no where near perfect, but– Don’t try to change the subject.”

He let out an indignant chuckle. “I wasn’t finished. I only meant…Just look at yourself and then look at me.”

“I see a witch and a wizard.”

“Funny,” said Draco with a straight face. “But really look. Because when I look at you, I see a compassionate, intelligent woman who fights for what’s right.” His eyes darted to his clothed forearm, the black mark almost visible through his white night shirt. “When I look at myself, I see is a monster. A beast. A coward, at best.”

You stayed silent, Draco’s hand still in yours. “I think your perception is tainted,” you said, withdrawing your hand from his to gently push back at his sleeve. He caught sight of a sliver of his Dark Mark, causing him to wince. Draco saw you reaching for a black marker next to your journal on the nightstand.

You uncapped it, taking hold of his hand.

“What are you–”

You silenced him with a brief kiss on the lips. You sat up and moved his arm onto your lap. “When I see you, Draco, I see someone who shouldn’t be defined by their mistakes.”

Keep reading

2

Diary entry #27

Dear diary: today I saw the most handsome man I’ve ever seen staring at me. Turns out the dude’s also a dork.

Cr. White Rose.

A Gifted Chef

I was lucky enough to be the next-door neighbor of a world-class chef. Like, legit world class. Like, Michelin star class. Yeah. The real deal. Stewart Therriault. Maybe you’ve heard of him.

One of the benefits of living near Stewart was getting to try all the sumptuous, creative dishes he’d make whenever he was home. Seriously, the guy cooked all the time. As soon as I’d see the lights go on in his house, it was only a matter of time before thick, luscious aromas wafted into my home. And, because he was a great guy, he’d often bring over a plate or two for me to try. “It’s all practice for the restaurant,” he told me.

Keep reading