i looked at him and i saw myself

scienceisfood  asked:

I had an ex who was a sober drunk. He once had a heart to heart with me after we broke up, about how he was afraid where it was going, but then he paused, blinked, looked around and saw me, assumed he said something bad and apologized as he just awoke from a black out. Sans doing that would be awful. Papyrus would be TORN. IN A BAD WAY. It would make him question any previous conversations. MEEBS, Flowey already messed him up, he doesn't need this too. *chocolate bribe*

I agree, he doesn’t.

BUT WOULDN’T IT MAKE A DELICIOUS ANGST? <takes chocolate anyway>

So a lot of my posts the past year on here have been very “depression/anxiety” focused in a vague way. I wrote this entire thing out for myself to be able to process it and move on and since I’m working on being more open about my emotions, I thought I’d post it here. If you’re crazy enough to read through this ENORMOUS thing, go ahead.

About a year ago I met a guy online through instagram. He followed me and I looked at his feed, instantly saw he was extremely handsome and had a ton of nerdy interests in common with me, so I shot him a message. We immediately got to flirting and in a few hours had exchanged numbers and other social media. We hit it off right away and I was so smitten by him that I offered to fly him to New York with a flight deal that happened to be available at the time (This sounds crazy from my point of view but I really felt like I had a very strong attraction to him and I wanted to see if anything could happen, it was worth it to me because I don’t feel like this about people often). He accepted and seemed really excited. We keep texting for a few weeks and he ends up getting a new job at a bar. One day he texts me and tells me that unfortunately because of his new job he won’t be able to visit me anymore because he can’t get the time off, but that he would pay me back (which he did). I’m crushed and dig further because I felt like there was something else, and he tells me that he’s not feeling interested in me the way we were when we first met a few weeks ago. I’m upset as this is a trend that happens to me a lot, people initially being interested and within a few weeks not finding me attractive anymore. I still don’t know why it happens.

We text a lot less in the coming weeks but he does like me as a friend so we still send funny stuff back and forth, stuff to do with our mutual interests, or just chatting about our day. Over the next few months I notice he’s getting flirty again and eventually he tells me that he wants to take that trip to NY and that he’d pay for it this time. I don’t feel like I have anything to lose and I still have feelings for him (although we’ve been chatting for 4 months or so at this point and still haven’t met) so I agree. He’s only coming for a few days because he can’t get a lot of time off, so I start to schedule tons of fun stuff for us to do and make sure he gets to see as much of the city as possible. I start to get really excited and I’m putting a ton of effort into making sure everything goes well.

About two weeks before the trip, he texts me and says he has something to tell me. He met someone and now they’re dating. He says he will still come but it would be just as friends. I’m crushed but am not ready to just let go of everything. I had already bought tickets to a broadway show as a surprise and had an amazing weekend lined up that I had spent countless hours planning. In my head I thought maybe if the trip went really well he would realize what a catch I am and choose me. The next two weeks are filled with turmoil as I watch his social media fill up with pictures and posts about his new boyfriend. The thought occurred to me over and over that he was going to bail on the trip, although he never outright said anything to make me think that so I kept hope. The night before he’s supposed to arrive he sends me a text about how it’s going to sound like he’s faking it, but he’s feeling sick. I have huge doubts and just tell him that I really really hope he makes it because I have a lot planned. The next day comes and in the morning he says he has a fever and is so sick he doesn’t think he’s going to be able to make the flight. I beg and plead for him to try, and reveal that I paid for the broadway tickets. He responds saying that he took some medication and is going to do his best. A few minutes later I get a phone call from him saying he’s lost his debit card and there’s no way for him to make it. I totally break down on the phone and tell him I won’t be able to talk to him for a while. I reach out to friends and have someone else visit me for the week to console me and do the things I had planned, and go to the musical with me. Throughout that week he tells me it was strep throat, and sends me pictures of him in the hospital and with visible scarlet fever to assure me that he wasn’t faking it. If it wasn’t for those pictures there is no way I would have believed him.

We text infrequently for the next month, but eventually he starts sending me texts about how his boyfriend is neglectful and a narcissist and doesn’t make him feel loved. I have mixed emotions as I still care about him and don’t want to see him in pain, but am still resentful that he got into a relationship only 2 weeks before coming to see me and sort of felt that he deserved for it to not work out. I bite my tongue and try to be supportive. A few more weeks and he texts me at 6am in a panic. He tells me his boyfriend physically assaulted him at a bar. I’m furious and helpless. I’m mad at his decisions but know I can’t take it out on him in this situation, and there’s nothing I can do from so far away. I try to console him and make sure he has a support system. He tells me that there’s no way he’s ever going back to this guy and that he’s blocked him on everything and had him banned from the bar he works at. I’m angry and sad for him but simultaneously feel justified that his relationship crashed and burned so spectacularly, and that he chose someone who would treat him so terribly over me. The next week he seems very shaken up and I regularly check in to ask how he’s doing. He tells me the (now ex) boyfriend is doing everything possible to get in contact with him, including sending him emails and waiting outside his apartment complex. I’m very concerned but don’t know how to help.

A week after this I notice a snapchat from him that has a person cut off that looks like his ex. I figure it must just me some other guy. A few hours later the snapchat is mysteriously gone. At this point I’m totally sure it was the guy and that they must be hanging out again. My fears are confirmed in the following days where there are more social media posts slyly showing that they are back together (Him with his boyfriends dog, him in his boyfriends car, they were friends again on Facebook). At no point does he admit to me over text that they are back together, and I stop responding entirely, angry that he hasn’t admitted this to me, concerned he’s going to be abused again, and unsure of how to bring this up.

I was in the dark for a while so I still don’t know what happened here. They did not continue to hang out or date, but I never asked for specifics.

Once it became clear they were no longer in contact, we started texting again as friends. The usual pattern happened and after a few months this time (around september) he became flirty again. He would send me thirst pics and me still finding him so attractive it was hard to resist. He talks about how he learned a lot from this past relationship and how he’s never going to make a mistake like that again. In October he hints that there’s a music festival he’s excited about in December and jokes that I should go. I say I’m actually available that weekend and would make the trip. For the next two months we text constantly and even count down the days until my visit. He seems as excited as I am and I’m really happy to finally get to meet this guy in person, even though he’s caused me so much grief. I have high hopes that when he meets me he’ll see how dedicated and thoughtful I am and recognize how well I would treat him in a relationship and all the good things I have to offer.

December comes and I land in Houston around midnight. He picks me up at the airport, it’s slightly weird at first to see each other in person but we get comfortable quick. We’re back at his place and pretty soon we start kissing and spend the night cuddling. The next few days for me feel magical. I have a stronger attraction to him than anyone else I’ve ever met, mentally and physically. We hold hands constantly and are super affectionate with each other. I have some social anxiety issues so being in a new state with someone I’ve really just met in person makes me a little reserved around his friends and in public, but I feel very comfortable with him. We go to the music festival and although the music isn’t really my taste, I have an amazing time because I’m with him. The first day I agree to try a weed edible with him (I don’t really smoke) and end up having a really bad anxiety and paranoia trip, but he stays by me the whole time and waits with me for several hours until it passes. I’m drained after this experience but we walk around, listen to a few more acts and then go home. The next day I feel a little fried and have some leftover anxiety from the experience, but am excited to spend another day together. We go to the second day of the festival and he’s super excited because a bunch of his favourites are playing this day. We split a molly between us which helped a lot with my lingering anxiety and let me loosen up and dance for a few hours as we watched his favourite artists. I have a really good time and we dance closely while kissing the whole night. He’s very sweet and seems very into me. He takes my baseball cap and turns it backwards, saying he likes it better on me this way. The artists play later than expected and by the time it’s done most of the festival has cleared out. We walk around the exhibits (it was an art + music festival) holding hands and taking cool pictures of ourselves in front of the art. We go home and have really good sex. He seems very attracted to me and reacts strongly to the smallest touch. I feel like I found my perfect match, everything meshes perfectly, our personalities fit, I’m attracted to him both in a loving way and in a sexual way and he seems to feel the same. We wake up the next day and there’s an air of sadness because we know I’m heading home the following day. We keep the day pretty low key, chilling at home. Later he invites one of his friends over and we all go out to eat. We talk about making plans for that night but we decide to chill at home and enjoy each others company before I have to leave in the morning. We spend one last night cuddling, sleeping late until we basically have to get up and go directly to the airport. He had mentioned wanting to play Pokemon so I offered to leave my nintendo DS with my Pokemon Moon on it here for him until the next time I visit and he accepts. He pays for us to park in a parking garage and walks me all the way to where I have to check in. I tell him how much I love him and assure him that I’ll fly back really soon or that he can come to new york any time. When it comes time to go through security he starts to tear up so I hold him close and ask him if I can call him my boyfriend. He says yeah. We have a long hug and I say goodbye for now.

45 minutes later I’m on the plane and he texts me that he misses me. I’m glowing, it’s been 5 years since I was in a relationship and am so happy that this trip worked out better than I could have dreamed. I’m validated that once meeting me in person he saw what we could be together and am just overwhelmed with the love I feel for him and have high hopes for our future. I’m already planning for when I can come back.

He texts me all day during my flights as usual and talks about feeling down that I’m not around anymore. For the next few days we text each other a lot, we send each other goodnights with lots of heart emojis and I feel like this long distance thing would work for me as long as I could fly down for a week every month or two. I ask him if it’s okay for me to book a flight at the end of January to come and see him, and that I can arrange to work from his apartment remotely. I tell him there’s no need to take time off, I just want to be able to spend more time around him in person and he reacts positively and says sure. Out of confidence I book the cheaper nonrefundable flights for the last week of January. I tell my mom that I’m dating someone (because she stalks me and is going to wonder why I’m flying to Texas), and being a huge gossip she tells my whole family, stalks him on Facebook and sends photos to everyone.

In the following days he texts less and less, and I start to feel like I’m the one initiating every interaction. I start to get a bit paranoid but assure myself that because the week trip went so well, he let me book another flight to see him, and he agreed to be my boyfriend, I’m just overthinking it and he probably just doesn’t want to spend all his time texting. Then two full days go by with no texts at all and I start to freak out. My mind goes through all the possibilities. I consider that it might be something else in his life that is distracting him, so I send a concerned message about how he’s been quiet and if everything is okay.

The next day I’m at the airport (I flew to my visit my family for christmas after leaving texas) to go home to New York, and while waiting to go through security with my mom and some family that came with me to the airport, I get a long and sudden text from him. The text says that no matter how hard he tries, he can’t think of me romantically, he can’t make himself think of me in a sexual way anymore, doesn’t think we’re a good personality fit, and that he sees me more as a really good friend. He says we’re very different people and that he’s attracted to more outgoing people who exude confidence and are the life of the party, and says that I am very shy and timid in public. He also talks about how me being there opened up a “slutty” phase in him and now he thinks he might be polyamorous.

I’m in total shock and panic. I’m devastated and surrounded by family. I go completely catatonic and am not able to eat my lunch. I have to tell my mom what happened while I frantically text him back trying to understand what is happening, desperate to fix it. I ask him why he didn’t lead on that he felt this way, why he let me leave my DS with him, why he let me buy the plane tickets, why he agreed to be my boyfriend, and he comes back saying he wanted me to have a good trip after the way he treated me in the past and he felt he owed me that. I’m absolutely heartbroken and can’t believe he thought this was a good idea or the right thing to do. He said he felt pressured when I asked him to be my boyfriend and didn’t want to upset me. I’m so confused because I am 100% sure he was very sexually into me, and him suddenly not being able to think of me that way seems like a lie. What I thought was a magical week was not real and what I thought was my first relationship in 5 years was completely fake and out of pity. I have to go through security and leave my mom, who is now crying because she knows how hurt I am and doesn’t know when the next time she’ll see me is. We hug, she tells me I don’t need anyone to make me happy, and I agree even though I don’t really believe it at the moment.

I continue texting, prying for answers, trying to find out if any of it was real, wanting to feel any emotional relief before my plane takes off and I’ll be without service for 2 hours. My mind is rushing a mile a minute through everything that happened and questioning how I didn’t pick up on any of his real feelings. I cry for the entire 2 hour flight.

The flight takes longer than expected and when I land I find I have missed my connection and that the alternative they booked me on requires me to spend all night in the airport in Ottawa. I’m the most emotionally drained I’ve ever been and I’m about to be pushed to my physical limit as well. I wanted to sedate myself so that I didn’t have to feel anything but I was forced to stay awake until my flight at 6:30am in an empty airport with only myself and my thoughts about what happened. I’m still unable to eat anything and I don’t feel safe sleeping in the airport. I fall asleep for an hour and have a paranoid dream about being mugged. I continuously try to text him throughout the night but my tone is getting angry about the situation and he doesn’t have anything left to say.

When it comes time to check in for my flight, the airline informs me because of the rescheduling they have no idea where my bag is and they can’t let me on the flight until it’s located. The thought of losing my belongings and possibly having to wait several more hours in the airport in this condition freaks me out and causes me to feel faint and throw up on the airport floor. I hadn’t eaten all day so it was mostly water but obviously people were concerned and staff sat me down and asked if I needed medical help and if I had any conditions. I just tell them I haven’t slept or eaten, they give me water and I pretend to be fine.

At the last minute they locate my bag and I’m able to catch my flight by a hair. I fly to New York, cab back to my apartment and get into bed by 10am, totally exhausted. As soon as I get into bed and relax I immediately start sobbing until I fall asleep and spend the next 24 hours drifting in and out of sleep.

It’s been four days since then and besides physically forcing myself out of bed a few times, I spend most of my time taking medication with drowsiness side effects so that I can sleep as much as possible. I still have no appetite and will often make it through the day on half a slice of pizza or a candy bar. I have no sex drive and can’t imagine myself ever being interested in someone else at the moment. Not having him in my life feels like I’m in withdrawal from a drug. Tomorrow is the first day of work after the holidays and I’m nervous about being able to function.

I’m trying to cut off contact with him completely but even after all this I don’t want to let go. I’m not texting him now but I want to every minute and I try to think of appropriate reasons that I could. It’s so rare for me to feel anything this strong for someone that I’m skeptical if it will ever happen again which makes me feel hopeless. And if I ever did have these same feelings for someone, it seems very likely the same rejection would happen again.

I feel like most people would think I’m crazy for being so attached to someone I only met in person for a week, but I think you’d be surprised what kind of connections can be made online with enough time and effort. Only posting this as a release and a way to document exactly what happened over the past year so I can look at it as a whole.

Edit: A few days after this he finally texted me to ask me how I was doing and apologize for how he lead me on. He seems to know he hurt me but not understand the full extent. He says he has something to tell me and that he’s been hiding his abusive relationship from me and he is still with the other guy in secret and that most of his friends don’t know about it because he’s ashamed to tell anyone. He says he’s stuck in the relationship and feels trapped with him because he keeps going back. This makes a little more sense to me and I realize he never loved me and was always just obsessed with his feelings for this other guy. It doesn’t help however, and actually makes me feel more depressed and hopeless. He gives me the same line he’s said before about how it’s over this time though and he’s cutting him out of his life. I do my usual thing where I put my problems out of sight and try to talk to him about this relationship and why he can’t get out of it if he doesn’t feel it’s healthy. He tells me that he was hoping me visiting would have helped him get over the abusive guy, but it didn’t. I’m an idiot and I know I have the flights for later in the month that he let me book, so I ask if he would be okay with me using them to come down so we could talk through everything in person so I can get the closure I need and he can answer all of my questions about the things he did to me and why he did them. He says that sounds fine to him.

The next few days he texts me a little about how the abusive ex keeps calling him and is very persistent, meanwhile I continue to spend my time in a deep depression, just trying to regain my appetite or be able to go to work. Texting is very sporadic and sparse for the next few weeks. He occasionally will message me something he’d think I’d like, we talk a little about trivial things like comics and anime but it doesn’t go anywhere. Just hearing from him gives me the endorphins I need to get by while I’m feeling so down.

Eventually one night he texts me out of the blue and says he’s realized he’s a homophobic narcissist and he has a lot to work on, and apologizes for what he did to me again. He said he realized he doesn’t usually treat people well and disappoints a lot of his friends. He talks about how he lies a lot and that he doesn’t really care about many people and that he doesn’t care about me although he wish I did. This this me very hard. Even after all this I still honestly thought he did care about me. At least in some capacity. I’m devastated.

I remind him that my plane tickets are for next week and I was going to use them to visit and talk. He says he forgot I was coming and assumed I had changed my mind and is no longer comfortable with me staying with him and doesn’t think it’s good for either of us (My flight is for an entire week because when I booked it I was hoping to spend as much time with him as possible). He tells me I’m seeming very desperate and it’s degrading to myself to still be so needy and that closure isn’t a privilege everyone gets to have. He says I’m not actually in love with him but I’m in love with the idea of being in love with him. This doesn’t resonate with me and seems very off the mark. My feelings feel very real to me. He ends up telling me that I can come but I have to get a hotel.

The conversation progresses into me digging more specifically into all the questions I have about how he could have acted that way when we met in person but actually not have been interested in me, why he agreed to be my boyfriend, why he let me buy the plane tickets, why he let me loan him my DS if he didn’t think we were ever going to meet again, and why he continued to flirt and say he missed me after I went home.

The answers are getting closer to making sense but still I’m shocked that someone would lie to me like that just to make a situation easier or less awkward. He did not feel the same spark for me that he felt for his abusive boyfriend (although he claims to not talk to him anymore at this point and that he’s no longer hung up on him).

I tell him I wish he did not do these things and how I’m still struggling to eat and live my life through the depression several weeks later. This makes him say that me reacting this way makes him even more sure that he made the right decision to not be with me and that he doesn’t need another guy in his life with issues that he needs to check up on.

I become determined to go back to Houston on my own terms and have a good time there without him. When I arrive I let him know I’m there to plan a time for us to have a talk in person but I know he doesn’t want to see me even though I’m there for an entire week. I go out to a few bars and meet some people. I’m feeling better than I have in a few weeks and have a little bit of confidence in myself for being able to make this trip.

During one of the first days he tells me we can meet up to have dinner. I’m waiting outside and when I see him pull up I immediately feel very overwhelmed by seeing him. We order and sit for a few hours while I uncomfortably try to get any closure or sense out of his actions from him. He reveals to me that he is back with the abusive boyfriend and actually just came from his apartment before meeting me. He says he loves him and they have great chemistry and he doesn’t see the relationship ending any time soon. At this point something in me breaks and I realize he’s just never going to get out of this and although it hurts, there is no getting through to him about this and he will always go back no matter how confidently he tells me he won’t. The entire time he has a strange mood about him, as if he’s trying purposely to act mean so that I won’t like him anymore. It feels stilted and very different from the guy I spent a week with the month before. I get the feeling he is frustrated with me and just ready for me to be out of his life so he doesn’t have to deal with me anymore. When our dinner is over I basically have the answers I was looking for, but they’re pretty much as bad as they could have been. His feelings were fake, he let me book flights, etc. because he didn’t know how to tell me not to and felt awkward about it, he agreed to be my boyfriend because he felt pressured, he was obsessed with his “ex” the entire time and could never really devote any actual love to me because of it, and he kept me around for so long because he liked that I always gave him the attention he craved.

As we’re leaving, the finality of the situation makes me start to cry and as he’s driving me back to my hotel I’m in a full hysterical sob. He drops me off and I feel all too aware that I won’t ever see him again.

It’s been almost a month now and we don’t really have any contact. I haven’t been sending him anything and he hasn’t sent anything to me. I don’t know how he’s doing, or where he is with the abusive guy. I don’t know if he thinks about me at all or if he’s glad to be rid of me and has totally moved on. Despite still feeling upset about this, this past month after returning from the second Houston trip I’ve been doing very well and am back on track with my life better than ever. I’m working through my anxiety issues, taking tons of opportunities I would have been too anxious to agree to, meeting lots of new people and catching up with old friends, I got a raise at work, I’ve been working out regularly and putting on some mass, discovering new music and pursuing new interests I was afraid to try previously. I’ve been learning to meditate and I should be starting therapy very soon.

So that’s the very very very very long story of why I’ve been up and down all year and how I’m doing currently.

2

“In fact, what happened was Harrison and I both began to drink and at some point early on I said, “Do you want to see me do an imitation of you?” Harrison didn’t walk, he swaggered, like John Wayne in slow motion – taking his seemingly bad attitude for a walk. To depict this, I moved out of sight and after a moment reappeared, strolling as he strolled, sauntering my way into whatever fresh hell I found myself. I’d become him, disenchanted Lord Ford, master of all he surveyed. I hadn’t looked at Harrison yet to see how my portrayal of him was going over – too busy appearing indifferent and impatient with my surroundings. As I continued to portray his inner monologue, I finally let at least one of my eyes slide wearily to his face and saw that he was not only laughing, he was laughing that silent and hard laugh reserved for true enthusiasm. Almost 40 years later, I still think of it as one of the greater moments of my life.”

Phichiiiiiitttttttttt!!!!!!!

You have no idea how excited I was when I know the there’s gonna be a Thai character in Yuri on ice. I always thought he look kinda Thai the first time I saw him in the ed but I don’t want to disappoint myself, BUT HE IS! 

And his name

HIS NAME 

I was expecting it to be something similar and easy to say in Japanese like Dan or Ken but noooooooooooooooooooo

IT’S PHICHIT FUCKING CHULANONT 

A FREAKING FULL ON THAI NAME!!!! 

AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE BEST PART IS? OF COURSE HIM AND YURI HAVING A VIDEO CALL LATE AT NIGHT AND YURI SPEAKING THAI IS TOTALLY AWESOME BUT THIS IS EVEN BETTER

Let me tell you that this place is real and the YOI staff got it all on point, the letters, the wordings, the spelling in Thai, the billboards, the tent in the front, the tangle of wires on the poles even the design of the iron fence. How did I know this you ask?

BECAUSE IT’S FREAKING RIGHT DOWN MY STREET, I DRIVE PASS THIS PLACE TO WORK EVERYDAY!!!! TRUST ME YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR THE VOICE I MADE WHEN I SAW THIS SCENE AND YOU DEFINITELY DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT WHEN I REALIZE THE GUY CHECKING HIS PHONE WHILE WALKING PASSED IT RIGHT THERE IS PHICHIT!!!!!

MY SINNAMON ROLL LIVED RIGHT NEXT TO ME I CAN’T  

[CNETZ] Idol Who Is Anti-ed By Pictures The Most

*Note: About how photos cannot capture Chanyeol’s irl beauty

*Note 2: One of the screencaps in the post was of a pann post discussing the same thing 

Source: Sohu Hallyu

[+682] I saw him irl before. I’d say even his bare face is sparkling and could dazzle you. How I wish I could throw myself into his arms. Omo.

[+539] I don’t know if I should cry or smile. He already looks so good in pictures. It turns out pictures don’t do him justice. He is really so beautiful irl that I’m gonna die.

[+412] he already looks so handsome in pictures, he must looks 10000000x more handsome irl.

[+298] lbr! He is really more handsome irl!!

[+283] lol, to my surprise, park chanyeol, pictures don’t do you justice

[+248] yes, yes. He is so handsome irl that your nose will bleed.

[+246] I’ve heard about this from many people.

[+226] you would not be willing to marry anyone after you see him irl.

[+221] *screencap of someone’s comment in another website which says: “stop it (tn: meaning stop judging solely from pictures), he looks totally different irl than in photos. I’ve seen him irl. I’d say his pictures are all fake. This is the first time that I’ve ever seen that pictures could anti the real look to such extent (tn: cannot capture his irl beauty). So it’s very unfair to judge his look only from pictures. You could not simply use handsome to describe him [after seeing him irl], he’s literally astonishing.”

[+208] Chanyeol looks so handsome in pictures already and you’re saying that pictures don’t do him justice? How astonishingly handsome is he irl?

[+208] I must not see him irl. He already looks like this in pictures. I bet I’ll pass out if I ever see him irl.

[+160] Those who have clearly outlined faces would not look as good in pictures as in real life.

[+141] omg…so called “pictures don’t do him justice”..i’m..dead..

[+128] I’m a fan of his voice, visual, and talents. I’m 20 yrs old but I could only lick his pictures at home. If I ever see him irl, I would definitely hold him in my arms and never let go.

[+60] I was shocked when I saw him irl. Never expected his face to be that small, his eyes to be that huge, naturally and beautifully huge. He is so thin, so tall. He was wearing a dark green t-shirt. I met him together with my college mate, who was a muggle. I asked her afterwards. She said she didn’t know anyone, couldn’t remember anyone and couldn’t see anyone, she only saw Chanyeol who was standing in front, he was so beautiful that he doesn’t look real, she had never seen anyone so beautiful in her entire life. This is exactly what she said.

I’m not a kid

Words: 2211 of pure smut lmao

Warning: Smut

Reader X Jungkook


Originally posted by dream-bts

You could say you had drink more than ever. You weren’t drunk, but you could feel the alcohol burning inside you. You were hanging out with Jimin and Jungkook as always. However, you never had understood why Jungkook was there, since you always saw him as a kid - despite the fact he was your age. Not that you didn’t like his presence, you loved it, he was one of your closest friends but he always looked like so… innocent.
You were all sit on the couch, you between the two guys.
“Wow, Y/N, I had never seen you drinking like this” Jimin pointed, a funny smile on his face.
“I don’t have reasons to control myself” you said as you took one more shot. The vodka reached your stomach like fire.
“She wanna get drunk” Jungkook said, obviously hiding his smirk as he saw your face twisting by the drink.
“Shut up, kid” you said
“We are the same age” he mumbled as Jimin laughed at your teasing.
Jungkook called the waitress and ordered one more round of shots, and you looked up in time to see her blushing under Jungkook’s stare. She smiled in a obvious flirty way and you strangely felt a little of jealousy. However it was just a friendly jealousy, you thought.
“Did you see that?” Jungkook asked Jimin, both with devilish eyes.
“Yes. She obviously would let you fuck her” Jimin said and you gasped.
“You are disgusting” you mumbled
“No, we are just young and beautiful, sweetheart” Jungkook said and Jimin agreed.
“Yes, Jimin may be, but you are just a kid” you groaned and his smile disappeared.
“You could sleep without that” Jimin laughed out loud.
“He deserved” you said, turning your body so your back was facing Jungkook, and you smiled at Jimin
“You love me, right?” Jungkook groaned from behind you.
“Be quiet while the adults are talking, kid” you said, not even turning to look at him and you heard his groan.
A few hours later, after a little teases from you to Jungkook, it was time to go home.
“Well, i’m gonna go home. Thanks for being my company, boys. See ya after ok?” you said as you hugged Jimin, but when you were about to hug Jungkook, he stepped away.
“Actually, it’s too late. I think i’m going to take you home, if you don’t care” he said. You looked at your clock, and it really was late.
“Ok, then” Jimin said “See you, Y/N. Jungkook you got the extra key?”
“Yes”
“Ok” Jimin said and got into his car.
You and Jk made your way home, talking bullshits and joking.
“Why do you keep calling me a kid?” Jungkook suddenly asked.
“I…hum… I dunno Kookie. I see you as a kid. You are too innocent and I can’t see you like I see Jimin” you answered.
“You know what, Y/N? I’m not that kid you think I’m” he said, you looked at him, his jaw was clenched. He looked so gorgeous. You didn’t say anything else till you got home.


“Can I come in? I need to use the bathroom” Jungkook asked as you opened your apartment’s front door.
“Yes, sure”
You entered into the living room. He already had been in your house so you didn’t guide him.
When he came back, he said he was leaving and you hugged him.
“You know where is the door, right?” you asked playfully and he smiled, nodding. When you saw him going towards the door you went to your bedroom, not even checking if he had left. You started undressing yourself. You were just in your underwear when you realized you didn’t have heard the door being opened or even closed.
You turned around to go checking and almost fell back when you saw Jungkook leaned on the door frame of your bedroom, staring at your semi naked body.
“What the fuck?” you screamed “Jungkook, what are you doing? Get the fuck out of here, now!” you said as you tried to cover yourself with your hands.
He just smirked. You got confused.
“So, you really think I’m…what did you call me? Ah! An innocent kid?” he said, tilting his head to the side.
You froze. You didn’t know what was happening or what was about to happen.
“Jungkook, I am semi naked. If you got hurt because I called you that, please, at least let me dress myself up and then we can talk about it, ok?” you said, still trying to cover yourself.
“That’s the problem, Y/N” he said, and started to walk towards you. You felt your heartbeats getting faster and stepped away. “I don’t wanna talk about me not being a kid”, he was in front of you now. “I wanna show you” he said and leaned in. You looked into his eyes and they were full of lust. The way he was looking at you… You grabbed his neck, trying to pull him closer but then he pushed you against the wall. You gasped as you felt your back touching the cold surface. He grabbed your wrists with one hand and put then above your head. The other managed to squeeze your waist and finally his lips touched yours. The kiss wasn’t passionate. It was rough and you liked it.
He bit on your bottom lip and pulled it, earning him a moan from you. He took the opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth, exploring every part of it. His hand left your waist and found your ass, squeezing it harshly as his mouth went down to your jawline and soon reached your neck. He sucked on your exposed skin, often giving you soft bites. He let your wrists go and you automatically wrapped your fingers on his hair, pulling him even closer. You felt his smirk against you.
“Seems like the kid is making you feel good, right?” he teased and you groaned in response. He slapped your ass and you gasped. “Answer me right when i’m being so nice to you” he said, biting your skin a little bit harshly.
“Yes, kid” you teased him to push him even further. He pulled away from you and slapped your cheek softly.
“Don’t fucking call me that when I am so close to fuck you” he groaned and you smirked. You felt yourself getting wet by his words and actions.
He started getting down, licking your breasts, your stomach and then he was kneeled in front of you. You looked down at him, he was looking up at you. That was so hot, so intimate. Your head was spinning. You were almost fucking one of your best friends. Jungkookie. The kid. He leaned in and rubbed the nose from your thigh to your semi clothed pussy.
He teased you, biting and licking over your panties, you whimpered because all you really wanted was to feel him better. He stood up and stared at you.
“Take your bra off” he whispered. You did as he said. He sighed when he saw your boobs. He grabbed your now bare breasts, squeezing one softly as his tongue played with the other. You moaned, arching your back.
He pulled away and undressed himself. You looked at his already hard cock and licked your lips. He pumped himself as he stared at you. His tip was dripping with pre-cum.
“You wanna it, huh?” he teased and you nodded.
“I dunno if you deserve anything from me. I am a kid, remember? This wouldn’t be right” he teased.
You knew what he wanted. He wanted you to beg, and you were excited enough to do that.
“Jungkook please. Please let me suck your cock” you begged and he immediately forced your shoulders down and you kneeled in front of him. You grabbed his erection and started moving your hand up and down slowly and his head fell back. “Are you gonna tease me all night, sweetheart? Or are you gonna suck my fucking dick?” he groaned and your clit screamed for you to be touched. You kept teasing him, licking the head of his cock and he couldn’t contain himself anymore. He wrapped his fingers on your hair and forced your head, so he was fully into your mouth. You gripped his thighs with your nails trying to push him away but he didn’t let you. “No, baby girl. Take it, take my fucking dick” he groaned, bobbing your head in and out. You managed to lick every part of his cock and looked up at him. He was staring at you with darkened eyes and you kept eye contact. You supposed he was about to cum because he pulled you away from him with a pop.
He pulled you up and told you to lay down on the bed. You did as he said. He crawled over you and placed his lips on yours. He pulled away and did spread your legs apart. He placed himself between them and kissed your stomach, licking and sucking. You moaned in pleasure. His hands started squeezing your waist, then your boobs. He kissed you again and his hand finally reached your still clothed pussy. He rubbed small circles on your clit and you couldn’t help but whimper.
“Jungkook, please” you begged
“Does that feels good?” he asked
You moaned in response and he smirked devilish. He put your panties aside and easily did slide one finger inside you.
“You’re so fucking wet. Are you this wet for me? This kid?” he teased
“Jungkoook, pleaseee” you whimpered.
“Who are you this wet for?”
“You” you whispered
“Good” he said and finally took off your panties. His thumb played with your clit, adding pressure and your eyes shut closed. You needed more. He did slide one finger into you again, and then a second, finally a third. The room was filled with wet sounds your pussy was doing. You were about to cum on his fingers when he suddenly put them out, making you groan. He pumped his dick a few times and placed his tip on your entrance, but didn’t push in, and you tried to move yourself against him to earn some friction.
“What do you want, Y/N?” he asked as he pushed in only the tip and circled it slowly, teasing you even more
“God damn, Jungkook! Please just do me!” you begged and he smirked.
“I think you’re not being clear enough"he teased
You got frustrated. You needed him to fuck you.
“Please, please jungkook fuck me hard and senseless ” you begged and his smirk appeared again.
“As you wish, princess” he said and slammed into you.
“Fuck” he groaned “your so tight”
He pulled out slowly and you cried out with the emptiness you felt. He slammed in again and you gasped.
His thrusts were very very slow, you needed more. You half cried and half moaned, begging him for more.
“jungkookie…” you moaned. He leaned in and kissed you, his thrusts still in a slow pace. “More, please”
He stopped moving and turned you around, he pulled your butt a little bit up and pushed into you again from behind. He grabbed your hair, pulling your head and leaned in. “Do you like to feel my cock on your tight little pussy?” he whispered on your ear.
You managed to say a clear “yes”. His thrusts became faster and harder. He was pushing in really deep, hitting your g-spot with every thrust.
“You’re really hot” he groaned. The sound of his skin slapping yours turned you on even more. His hand that wasn’t wrapped on your hair was now playing with your nipples and then started rubbing your clit, adding pleasure.
He stopped moving again and did lay down. He tapped his lap, signaling you.
“Ride me” he said and you straddled his hips. He grabbed your waist and lowered you slowly, but you were so nasty you lowered yourself with a slap against his thigh.
“Fuck” he gasped. You started moving up and down, his hand reached your breasts and played with them. He was thrusting really deep and every thrust was pushing you over the edge. You felt your climax getting closer and closer as he thrusted into you.
“Cum for me” he said and slapped your ass. That was enough for you, the mix of pain and pleasure making you cum.
“Jungkook” you moaned and when he heard his name coming out from your mouth, he came too.
“Fuck, Y/N” he groaned as he released inside you.
You got off his lap and did lay beside him, both breaths heavy. 


You both were cleaned up and dressed up. You were sit on the edge of your bed and he stopped in front of you. He grabbed your chin and made you look at him.
“Did I hurt you?” he asked
“No. Jungkook, that was amazing” you said, blushing. He smirked and sighed.
He pulled you up. He leaned in and placed a soft kiss on your lips, which was nothing seemed like those he gave you when you were fucking. He pulled away and smirked at you, leaning his forehead on yours.
“So, still see me as a kid?” he asked.

In fact, what happened was Harrison and I both began to drink and at some point early on I said, “Do you want to see me do an imitation of you?”

Harrison didn’t walk, he swaggered, like John Wayne in slow motion – taking his seemingly bad attitude for a walk. To depict this, I moved out of sight and after a moment reappeared, strolling as he strolled, sauntering my way into whatever fresh hell I found myself. I’d become him, disenchanted Lord Ford, master of all he surveyed.


I hadn’t looked at Harrison yet to see how my portrayal of him was going over – too busy appearing indifferent and impatient with my surroundings. As I continued to portray his inner monologue, I finally let at least one of my eyes slide wearily to his face and saw that he was not only laughing, he was laughing that silent and hard laugh reserved for true enthusiasm. Almost 40 years later, I still think of it as one of the greater moments of my life.

—  (x)

“But what, exactly, do I look like?”

Curio gazed into the reflective surface of the cabinet, but only saw the contours of the dim room behind him. His eyes darted to the hazy figure in the kitchen chair beyond where his reflection ought to have been. “Draw me again. It isn’t fair that you get to see me, but I can’t even see myself.”

The girl ran a hand through her tousled hair, disturbing the halo of cold moonlight being cast upon it through the window above the sink. 

She sighed and took in the odd figure before her. Curio had never been particularly well groomed, though she admitted inwardly that it’d be hard to keep oneself tidy without the ability to use a mirror. “I’ve drawn your portrait nearly every night for the past 3 months, and you always reject it. I’m also starting to run out of graphite,” she added, weakly.

Curio spun fluidly, trapping her with a pale glare. “I reject your portraits because they aren’t very good. Though I supposed they’re getting better.” His nostrils flared slightly as if his small compliment had taken a great amount of effort.

“Fine! Fine. But you’re letting me go back to sleep after this.” She rose to fetch her sketchbook, fully aware that she wouldn’t be allowed to return to bed until dawn chased the shadows away.

“Fool Me Twice” (Bad Boy!Jooheon AU)

(GIF Credit to @wonhontology)

Part One

Title: Fool Me Twice

POV: 1st

Rating: Mature. Smut, cursing, drinking, etc.

Summary: He says that you’re different, but he’s not the best at showing it. 


“So are you guys dating, then?”

“No”

My friend gave me a look like she didn’t believe me, and at this point I was only trying to convince myself.  

Keep reading

Little things that make me happy: I was watching the cast commentary of Fellowship of the Ring and in the scene where Frodo wakes up in Rivendell and Sam runs in and grabs his hand, Sir Ian McKellen (Gandalf) explains that originally they didn’t have them doing that but Ian talked to Sean Astin (Sam) and said “look it’s in the book” to convince him to do it and Ian specifically says in his commentary “for a gay person like myself” to see something like that in the movie would give that relationship between Sam and Frodo something more and I just. I’m so happy Ian McKellen saw that opportunity to not just include that bit from the book but to chip away at that ‘guys don’t touch each other’ hypermasculine idea and give Frodo and Sam’s friendship a more heartfelt and emotional connection

Tricks like this stir me up. Now your secret’s out.

4

This is where Steve finally realizes what Tony means to him, and what he means to Tony. He goes to find him, they confess their feelings, kiss, and live happily ever after. 

But seriously, that’s what it looks like is gonna happen by the look on Steve’s face.

2

Based in a dream I had 2 days ago, (yes, finally I dreamed with Yoosung ;///;) he was looking through one of the windows of my house (idk) and wearing those clothes. When I saw him there, I hugged him from behind and he took my hands. (I’m representing myself as mc in this drawing) I woke up very happy lololol ♥ Enjoy!

Ok so I said to myself I was gonna wait to buy online the english version it’s useless haha but I saw this gift from heaven (Yoneda sensei’s my goddess for real) in a french shop and I think I nearly screamed, I looked at my bro who understood immediately and said “BUY IT” (I love him too much) so I couldn’t wait and did it and now omg I’ve got this gorgeous masterpiece in my hands and I couldn’t be more glad.

I love Yoneda sensei as well as all of the Saezuru’s fandom, I’ve never really involved myself with it because I’m sometimes too shy but I would like to. So thanks everybody for having been so active in this fandom until now and Yoneda Kou as well for everything she’s been doing. Kisses to you all :)

I started listening to Welcome to Night Vale recently and I think I fell in love, thanks again for showing me this shit @silversatori! xD

I got curious if there was any fanart of him and checked out the tumblr tags (in hindsight maybe not the best idea, I might have spoilered myself a little lol) but I wanted to draw Cecil as well at least once and since for all I know he has little to no taste in fashion (like me) I crammed up some imo shitty looking clothes and threw them together in this doodle
And yes, that is a friggin Jat (jeans+hat)

My overall design for him as it is now isn’t really mine though, I just kind of threw together all kinds of designs I saw and liked and crammed it all up into this out of both lazyness and tiredness :’D

I know I’m hanging behind on things, but I hope that you’ll (after a too long period of not posting any art lmao) like it~

Open Your Eyes

I’m trying to ease myself back into writing so please bare with me. They’ll most likely be horrible for the time being hahaha. I might make this a short multi chapter story….we’ll see how it goes♡

***

“This case is killing me.” You mindlessly whisper to no one in particular.

“Are you okay, Y/N?” Spencer asks quietly.


You look up from the case file in your hand and focus your gaze on him. You hadn’t realized everyone was stating at you and it made you uncomfortable suddenly. You’d never felt that around them before and you knew they saw the discomfort no matter how quickly you covered it up.


“Yeah Spence I’m fine.” You reply cautiously. You clear your throat and nod, this time adding a little oomph in your answer, “I’m okay, seriously.”

You stand and walk toward the board as you try to piece it all together without the missing pieces you’d not yet found. 3 girls from different schools wound up dead, their bodies entangled together in a triangle formation, but there was no connection between the 3. Not even mutual friends. It seemed borderline cult like but that didn’t sit well with you. You believed it was something else…you just weren’t sure what.

Sighing heavily you back away and glance at the time. Hotch regarded you carefully before clearing his throat and gathering everyone’s attention, “How about we call it a night and go get dinner together?”

It wasn’t often he suggested work family dinners when out on cases so you knew you weren’t the only one struggling with this case. Derek and Spencer agreed and JJ and Emily were already talking about where to eat. Rossi stood by Hotch seemingly having a random conversation but from the occasional glance overs you knew you were the choice of topic.

You grabbed your bag and slung it over your shoulder as Spencer caught yours, and everyone else’s attention, “Um…are you coming Y/N?”

“Um I’ll…"You watched as his shoulders lumped slightly alongside everyone else’s and changed your mind, "Yeah I’m coming. I just want to get changed out of these clothes.”

Spencer smiled and stood, “I’ll walk you back to-”

“Oh no Spence it’s okay. The walk to my room isn’t far. I’ll just meet you guys in the lobby.” You state before walking out of the room. Everyone stared after you wondering what it was about this case that was haunting you along with how you couldn’t see the straws Spencer was grasping at with you.

You slid your room key in the door and dumped your bag by the stand. Closing it behind you you walked into your room and slumped onto the bed wanting to curl up and go to sleep. You knew if you did that though the team would be up here guns blazing.

You stood and decided on a quick shower. You stripped and winced as you caught your reflection. You hated what you saw no matter how irrational and harsh you knew you were being. Hopping into the shower you closed your eyes as the water cleansed the day off of you. The smell of shampoo and condition permeating the steamy air. Turning the water onto cold you felt the sudden shock your body went through before adjusting to the new temperature. You started this habit 3 years ago and yet it shocked you every time.

Shutting off the water you got out and wrapped a towel around you tightly before rifling through your bad for something to wear. You had dresses to choose from or jeans and shirts…but you settled on tights and a large grey hoodie paired with flat ankle boots. Wasn’t exactly the prettiest thing but you couldn’t be bothered. Throwing your wet hair into a messy bun and coating your lips with balm you grabbed a small bag with your credentials and other necessities and made your way to the lobby.

The first person you saw was Derek and a lump formed in your throat. Derek calculated your every move. He’d clocked onto you the second you walked out of the elevator. He watched as you dragged your feet closer to him and the hard swallow as you saw him. Any other time Derek would be a little offended but this time…this time he was worried. You’d never regarded anyone in this team the way you’d be doing all day. Just as you reached Derek he saw another pair of eyes calculating your every move and Derek couldn’t help but feel bad and protective.

“Hey pretty girl. You ready for some much needed food?” Derek asks casually. Genuinely.


“Yeah, actually, I am. I’ve heard their prawn cocktails are something to die for!” You say happily before realizing your words. A sinking feeling settled in your stomach so you tried to correct yourself, “I mean…I’ve heard they’re the best in the country so…so yeah…”

Derek frowned and placed a hand on your shoulder, “Pretty girl…what’s going on in the head of yours?”

“What? Nothing! I’m just…” Your words fell off as you watched Derek raise an eyebrow at you completely unconvinced that everything was fine, “I’m just a little tired and this case is proving to be more and more difficult.”

“Alright!” The sound of Rossi’s voice boomed and gave you the biggest fright you’d had in a while and it made you jump. Derek threw an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close.

“I’ve got you. Don’t worry, we’ll find the guy.” Derek tried reassuring you.

You nod and let him lead you to the table. Everyone orders and chats as you sink further and further into your chair. You couldn’t help but think about the case. There was something you were missing and you felt as if the answer was dangling right in your face but you couldn’t grasp it long enough to make sense of it.

Spencer clears his throat and raises his glass as he smiles at everyone. When his eyes settle on you, he begins to speak, “I just want to propose a toast. To the best of best friends anyone could ever have!”

And your stomach twisted something chronic as everyone made a round of, “Cheers!”

You stood, wobbling at the knees. You heard everyone calling your name and asking what was wrong but you kept walking away. You couldn’t forget this. Not this. You were so close! You found yourself standing at your door and finally got the door open as you ran for the case file. You pulled out the papers regarding the 3 dead girls and wrote the names of their best friends on a spare white board you had.

You hadn’t realized the team standing in your room watching as you frantically write down names and dates and circle 3 new names. You pick up your phone and dial Garcia on her personal number. After a few rings the line opens, “The great and almighty…blah blah…you know the rest. Y/N why are you waking me from my beauty sleep? It better be good. Oooh! Is it Spencer?”


You scrunched your face up in confusion. Spencer sighed and the rest of the team looked around awkwardly. You turned around and faced them before turning back and asked Garcia a few questions, “Is there any connection between the 3 girls best friends? And if so what is it?”

“Um good question girl genius.” You hear her tapping away and just as a yawn sneaks up on you she answers, “There…is. Wow Y/N how did you think of that one?”

“It was something Spencer said at dinner. How are they connected?” You say absent-minded. The girls being connected was a good place to start. Maybe they could recount the night the girls went missing and you could find some of the pieces you were missing.

You and Spencer had dinner together?! Well it was about damn-

“Team dinner. You weren’t invited.” You joke before she could go any further with her sentiment.


“Oh….oh right. Well, these girls met at a club. Hmm….that’s strange.” Garcia says as she types faster than you could keep up, “Oh this is not good…this is so not good…”

“What is it?” Hotch says making you jump. A hand descends on your back and you take note of who it is immediately. You give Spencer a grateful smile before waiting for Garcia answer.

“Boss man! Well according to these later dated Facebook statuses that the youth of today deem important…these 3 girls use to be the targets of mass bullying. As soon as they met their respective best friends, bless their souls, they shot up to popularity and was never the brunt of someone’s bullying ever again. Before that though they met regularly at a place called-”

“Marios?” You ask timidly.

“Yes. How you know?” Garcia asks. The team stood and watched you closely. The way you wrapped your arms around you as you tried to shrink into yourself.

“I-I used to go there as a teenager.” You say sadly, “Thanks P.”


“No problem girl genius. You should really ask Spen-” You ended the call. This wouldn’t end well. You knew that place and you knew what happened there all those years ago. This is why you were feeling off this entire case. Why everything felt like a story you’d forgotten about and couldn’t remember.

“Y/N?” Spencer asks softly. You turn to him as tears form. He goes to reach for you buy you step back and hold your hand out to push him back. Everyone stares at you worried.

“I know what’s happening.” You say as as tear falls, “I know because….because it’s happened before. And I was a part of it.”

Protected (Part 8)

summary: reader witnesses something horrible and somehow Bucky ends up being her bodyguard

warnings: just some fluff

word count: 2174

a/n: i love tony

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

Originally posted by rebecca-donell

A distant murmur of voices. A dull, but violent pain all around me. The voices grew louder, clearer, while the pain only intensified. Soon I could decipher words, each of them when spoken sending jolts of pain through my mind. One voice was softer, but distressed while the other was deep and smooth yet dripping with guilt.

Keep reading

3. Make me

J had his hands tucked behind his head as he whistled, laughing quietly at the other patient’s complaints. He heard a commotion down the hallway and scrunched up his face, who would dare interrupt his whistling? IT sounded like guards moving a non compliant prisoner into the cell across from him. He rolled his eyes as he saw her familiar hair. When the guards left, she hesitated to speak.

“So, uh… hey.” J growled and glared at her. He started twitching, a sign that he was extremely angry at her and probably Frost too.

“Why isn’t Frost watching you?” She struggled to meet his stern glare.

“Um, because I might have- I may have, accidentally, snuck out? But J I had a perfect plan! And I thought maybe Frost might like me if he could see me handle myself and get you out.”

“And look at what a great job you did.” J said in a monotone voice.  Y/N rolled her eyes and was thankful there were two glass walls between them when she saw J clench his fists.

“Hey, it’s my first run. I actually think I did pretty well.” Her eyes narrowed when J scoffed. “ But if you had Frost glaring at you all the time, you’d feel pretty bad too.”

“Really? Do you hear the way you talk to him? ‘Nice comb over Frost’?”

“Hey! It was a compliment!”

“You laughed as you said it!”

“Shut up, clown!” Harvey Dent yelled from one cell over. Y/N gave a bright smile in his direction.

“Hey, Harvey.” J rolled his eyes when Two-face’s voice softened a reasonable amount. “Hey, darlin’.”

“Sorry to interrupt your little flirting session, but can you explain to me how you got in here?” J glared at Two-face who only rolled his eyes and went to lay down on his cot.

“I told you, I snuck out. Don’t blame Frost by the way. Do they have pizza here?” Her attention span was like a three year old’s. He snapped his fingers in front of her.

“Focus. I-”

“I think you should be nicer to Frost, he looks depressed.”

“I’ll be sure to kill everyone he knows when I get back, don’t worry. Now-”

“Like he legitimately looks like he wants to kill himself every time he’s around you. Every time I see him, honestly. We should get him a date! Or at least take him on one.” J shot himself with a finger gun. Y/N widened her eyes and nodded.

“Yes, good job, J! You know what ‘killing yourself’ is. Don’t worry, being around people with a significantly higher IQ than yourself is likely to raise yours.” J glared at her. Y/N giggled and felt a sense of pride when the other criminals around them laughed. She knew she would pay for this, but it was fun while it lasted.

“So….they serve pizza?”

“No-”

“F-f-focus on me. Focus.” She started singing. J cringed at her terrible voice.

“What?”

“You told me to focus earlier. It made me think of the song. Ariana Grande? No? Youuuu maaaakke me feel like a dangerous woman, somethin’ bout, somethin’ bout, yoouuuu-”

“Y/N, when I get out of here I’m removing your voice box.”

“And I’ll remove your birth canal.”

“What?”

“What?”

They got several shouts from the other inmates as they argued all night.

……………..

“50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55” Y/N counted J’s push-ups with boredom, her head resting on her hands and her body lying on the ground to get a better view. Her boredom increased so she rolled onto her back and continued to count without looking. J paused when her numbers were off, and looked over at her while blowing a piece of hair from his face. He stayed in a planking position while staring at her from his cell. He whistles to get her attention.

“Get off that floor, it’s dirty.”

“Make me.”

“Oh, I’ll make you, you little brat.” She blows a raspberry at him and looks at him upside down.

“How long does it usually take Frost?” J resumes his push-ups.

“He’ll be here soon. But I’ll make sure to leave you for a couple more weeks.” She rolls her eyes and fake laughs.

“Ha ha, very funny. You’re hysterical.”

“So I’ve been told.” He resumes his push-ups, but pauses as she makes a sly comment.

“Good, you need to work out. You have like, no abs.” He stops mid push-up and glares at her through his lashes.

“You’re lucky there’s bars between us, little girl.” Y/N stifles a smile.

“Bars? No honey, this is glass. Y’know a hard, brittle substance, typically transparent or translucent, made by fusing sand with soda, lime, and sometimes other ingredients and cooling rapidly-” She talks to him like a five year old and J pushes himself off of the ground, his chest glistening with sweat. He looked feral and beautiful, but she’d never tell him that.

“Go away.”

“I-” She screams as an explosion is heard from down the hall. J doesn’t even flinch. Instead, he stares at her like a tiger being ready to get out of it’s cage and attack. She gives him a nervous chuckle.

“Hey, buddy, you know I was just playing, right? Your abs are so much more prominent now, those push-ups really came through.” He continues to glare at her. His glare turns to Frost as he comes down the hallway.

“Frost.” J greets, a threat laced in that one word. Frost seems to know and gives him an apologetic glance.

“She snuck out of the window.”

“Jeez, way to rat me out, Frost!” They both ignore her. The cell door opens and Y/N no longer feels the sense of security she felt behind that glass. Two henchmen offer their hands, and Y/N gives them a grateful smile while Frost wraps J’s croc coat around his shoulders.

Y/N mutters a, “Diva.” and her heart jumps when J glares right at her.

“What was that?”

“Nothing, my sweet prince.” She fist pumps when he lets it go, and she earns a glare from Frost.

“What?” J grabs something from Frost and walks up to her. He turns her around and wraps something collar-like around her neck.

“Hey! What is this?”

“A choker with a tracker device.” Is Frost’s short explanation.

“What? That’s a violation of my privacy!” She shuts her mouth as J gives her a look.

“Now that I have two people to babysit, it’ll be easier to keep track of the one that likes to run off.” That was the most she heard Frost say, and her eyes cut to J to see if he reacted to the ‘babysit’ part. He didn’t, and she assumed Frost was the parent in this relationship. Or the stoic uncle.

………..

Y/N felt bad that she put Frost through so much stress by leaving. She took her own advice and started being nicer to him. She even got J in on it too.

“Well you don’t look entirely terrible today, Frost. You actually dressed like a human being.” J purred at Jonny who was reading the newspaper. Frost blinked.

“Thank you, sir.”

Y/N cheerfully skipped in, throwing a bright smile Jonny’s way.

“Newspaper? I didn’t know that still existed.” She sat down next to him and offered him a piece of her gum. “You know, Frost, you look good for a man your age.”

“I’m 35.” Y/N gives a laugh and nudges him with her elbow.

“Frost, you’re so funny.”

“No, really-”

“Frosty, do we treat you right?” J now spoke, walking up to Frost like a tiger ready to pounce.

“Uh, yes-” Frost tried not to pull back as J caressed his arms, running his hands up and down them.

“You seem so sad. We just want to let you know we appreciate you.” Y/N gave him a reassuring smile. Jonny was nervous, he didn’t like being the center of attention when it came to them.

“And who knows, maybe there is a girl out there your age that would like you.” Frost sighed. He knew she meant well, but she couldn’t compliment someone to save her life.

“Thank you. But I’m fine-” Y/N opened her arms and pulled Frost to her. He didn’t know how to react with J standing right there. She pulled away before he could do anything.

“We love you Frosty.” Jonny nervously turned his eyes towards J.

“Yeah, Frost. We loooove you.” J was obviously doing this for Y/N’s benefit more than Frost’s. To sell the whole performance, J wrapped his arms around Frost, squeezing tight enough to hurt. Frost cringed, and figured J was enjoying himself. When J pulled away he looked Frost right in the eye, and then pressed a sloppy kiss to his cheeks, making sure to make it sound as gross as possible. Frost drew the line when J leaned in to kiss his lips. He jolted back, and J laughed his mad laugh. He sat in his lap the rest of the morning.

 Frost made sure to never look depressed again.