i look like 5 years older now

LETS TALK CRTS: Barrel Distortion

So I think most people know I hate shaders on emulators. I find artificial scanlines distracting and blurring and NTSC effects to uglify things… But I get why some people like them for sure and there is an argument to be had over whats more authentic. But there is one shader I hate with a burning passion and that’s BARREL DISTORTION.

See that bowing? Yeah that. I hate it so much. Sometimes a little barrel distortion can be alright, but when it’s pumped up it just looks like hell to me. Now personal preferences are personal preferences, but seeing a lot more indie games emulate this effect, I was caught thinking “I don’t REMEMBER barrel distortion when playing on old TVs.” Which is also crazy because that’d be for me within the last 5 years. So then I see this…

Fight’n Rage looks awesome so I’m not shitting on it. Judging by older screenshots, the extreme distortion is a stylistic choice not an attempt at realism… but seeing UIs like that in emulator screenshots had me thinking “Is this right? I don’t think this is right. I think I know why this isn’t right so let me check some photos… Okay yeah this isn’t right.”

So while this is fine to do for stylistic or taste reasons, I just want to make it perfectly clear: This is not an accurate depiction of a CRT’s curved screen. Not this or the previous screenshot. Unless your goal is to emulate a busted CRT. Because apparently a think a lot of people don’t know is… 

CRT’s don’t project a rectangle onto a curved surface

So lets learn about CRTs! The easiest way to know about this is by owning a flat screen CRT (I’ve owned several) and realizing ‘wait, my screen as distortion and lensing issues) and then having to go through the settings and fix it. You’d THINK displaying a rectangle on another rectangle would be easy, but CRTs don’t just project rectangles. They project all kinds of shapes and you gotta smash it into a rectangle with MAGNETS. The purpose of all this? Well no one wants their TV to look like a bubble. So the image on most CRT’s is pinched and distorted so that optically everything looks straight.

Look at this old curvy boy. You can see some lensing on it but i’s mostly pretty straight! How Well, the image – or more so, the path of the electron beam is bent by electro magnets to be…. something like 

Probably not that extreme but you could get the idea. You’re counteracting one distortion with the opposite distortion.

Here is a CRT with that dialed in too far.

Wide screen HD CRTs are tweaking nightmares. Look at all the distortion in the image trying to make whatever weird shape an electron gun wants to take into a perfect rectangle.

LOOK AT THIS GOOD BOY. So straight and true. You’ll have a little distortion still but VERY VERY LITTLE.

Even at an angle you can look at the lines on this game and they look -super straight-.

If you wanna have some idea what the settings on a CRT do to the shape of the final image, watch this from 2:30

Look how fluid the image is distorted and pressed into shape. CRTs are a craaaazy technology and people did whatever they could to get a good image, even if that involved sticking in more magnets. But even basic pinch settings are interesting to watch be dialed in.

So yeah, the gestalt memory of CRT screens is like, extra crapified from what they actually looked like and it makes me sad. :(

Ok throughout my time in the fandom, I have seen a lot of hate directed towards the ship otayuri, but honestly since the first WTTM clip was released I feel like it’s gotten worse I I just can’t stay silent about it.

Let me put this simply; otayuri isn’t pedophilia. Pedophilia is the attraction of an adult FIVE YEARS OLDER than the victim. I don’t have to be good at math to know that 16+5 doesn’t equal 19.

That’s another thing, Yuri is canonically 16. So you can’t even use the “oh but he’s 15” argument. Just look at this page in the OFFICIAL pages in one of the books released by the creators of Yuri on Ice (as pictured above).

That’s right. Yuri is 16. Case closed. It’s not pedophilia.

Now I completely respect your opinion if you don’t ship it or if it makes you uncomfortable, but you can’t go around labelling it as pedophilia when it’s been proven on numerous occasions that it isn’t. That’s just belittling a serious, serious issue and that’s not okay.

The antis comment a lot of how Yuri can’t be in a relationship because he is too young to have sex, which I agree with, but who says their relationship has to be sexual? Who says everyone ships otayuri sees it as sexual? I know there are some people out there who do, and I honestly don’t agree with that, but why should a small group ruin it for everyone? Cos honestly, most otayuri shippers I’ve seen and spoken to just value the innocent love in their relationship. So are the antis telling me that every relationship is sexual? As an asexual, I know this is not correct.

Now I do agree with the antis on one thing (wow surprise); no one should be drawing sexualised art or writing sexual fiction featuring otayuri. If you want people to respect your ship, you have to respect that it’s not okay to portray a 16 year old in a sexual relationship. I know that some 16 year olds are, but we still should not be fixating on that. I even agree that we shouldn’t be aging the up just to have them in a sexual relationship. Like, why does it matter? Surely it’s not just me as an asexual that doesn’t see why people must fixate on that aspect of a relationship and neglecting the other important parts of a healthy relationship, especially one that is developing. We should be focusing on the love Yuri and otabek have towards each other without that aspect.

That’s all for now my dudes, so please enjoy WTTM, respect each other’s opinions, and don’t use the word pedophilia incorrectly or draw otayuri in a sexual relationship ✌🏼

What are best friends for?

2953k words
Smut
Description: When your best friend finds out that you have never orgasmed he takes it upon himself to help.

Taehyung is one of my best friends and has been since childhood, we are so close that when it came to my virginity I told him the day I lost it. He is a year older than me and that resulted in us being very close, sharing secrets and just stupid shit in general. He moved in next door to me when I was 5, I didn’t like him at first, he was always so giddy and happy; that hasn’t changed at all, though now it is one of my favourite traits he has.

As I am walking down the university halls I bump into something that feels like a brick wall disguised in human form. When I look up I see Taehyung grinning down at me. Confusion washes over me “why the hell didn’t you move out of the way, Tae?” I pout and his grin seems to grow, “I thought maybe if you ran into someone it would encourage you to not look at your phone while walking the halls”. He is one of the most annoying little shits I have ever met, I stand there looking up at him still pouting when he says, “oh come on, wipe that pout off your face, especially since I am inviting you to come to a hotel with me this weekend” a smile starts to grow at his words but is completely replaced with more confusion than before, “what about your girlfriend? That was supposed to be your romantic getaway” his smile falters a bit before saying “I caught her cheating on me with her professor, and as much as I would like to chat about this I have to head off to my next lecture. I will drop by yours tonight”. He jogs off and I turn around to watch him run away, he should know better than thinking I am just going to drop this.

I walk into my apartment after a long day at uni and see that Tae has already made himself comfortable on my couch watching something on Netflix. I walk over to him and sit next to him dropping my back pack on the way. I stare at him for a bit before he pauses the movie and gives in telling me about everything between him and his girlfriend and how he feels betrayed but not incredibly sad making a joke about how he has me instead. We laugh and end up talking all night about life and future plans.

I wake up Saturday morning and feel like I am being stared at, I turn my head to the side and see Tae staring at my face. Shock washes over me and I scream jumping back extremely startled. He stands up and walks over to me, “Tae what the literal, actual hell? What are you doing in my apartment staring at me at-” I glance over to my clock and see that it is 9am,”-9 o’clock in the morning?” He stops in front of me and has a gleeful look on his face, “I thought I would come wake you up we are leaving soon and I knew you would still be asleep”. I start to calm down understanding but then question his actions “okay, fair enough but why were you staring at me? Wouldn’t waking me up by speaking to me or shaking me be easier?”, He smiles sheepishly and replies easily “you looked cute and peaceful so I left you alone” I looked down at the ground and blushed furiously, he laughed and told me to get ready. I watched his back as he walked out of the room, his back muscles moving ever so slightly under his shirt, I wonder what sound he would make if I ran my nails down- no! I shake my head trying to get rid of the erotic thoughts of Tae hovering over me in bed. I run to the shower and get ready with what little time I have left.

I emerge from the shower and Tae is sitting on my bed, he looks at me with a certain look in his eyes that makes my knees weak. I compose myself and ask him to leave so I can get dressed, he walks over to me and leans down to my ear “don’t take too long we have to leave soon” and with that he has managed to leave me hot and bothered again. Such a fucking tease.

The car ride was silent and I was so tired, I wasn’t exactly woken at my preferred time or way. When we arrived at the hotel Tae got out of the car and grabbed the bags, he walked up to the reception with me wandering after him. He smiled to the receptionist asking for his room key, she practically drooled at him and I couldn’t even blame her because I had been feeling the same way recently. I had never felt this way about Tae, getting nervous, jealous … aroused. He was pissing me off and he didn’t even realise it, and just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse we entered the room and there was only one bed. We have shared beds before but that was before he was giving me so many emotions and mixed signals. I looked at him and he seemed to notice my shock and he spoke saying, “sorry, I only booked one room because it was supposed to be my girlfriend and I, but I mean, it isn’t like we have never shared a bed before” I analysed his face and took in his words and decided it would be fine. I don’t want him thinking I like him because he might leave me and I don’t think I would be okay with that he is the one thing I cannot lose, no matter what.

I hear Tae’s voice coming from the bathroom, “C’mon Y/N, we are hitting the pool!” I sigh and roll my eyes “Taehyung, you know that it is 11 o’clock in the pm right now? The pool might not even be open, and it is late and cold” Tae pokes his head out of the bathroom and smirks at me “perfect! Now get your bathing suit on, or birthday suit, I’m not picky”. He has such a smug little face, I pick myself off the bed and walk over to my luggage grabbing my swimmers. I stand up straight and walk over to Tae whom still has his face poking out of the bathroom I pull him out by his cheeks and walk in so I can change.

We walk down to the pool area and to my surprise it is still open, why is that? Hotel pools always close at like 9. I brush it off and follow Tae into the pool, he jumps in first and splashes water on me in the process. I grumble at him a bit but start walking towards the lounging chairs deciding to relax instead. I haven’t even sat down for a minute before Tae is standing over me getting me wet, in the un-fun type of way. I look up to glare at him but he moves his face down to mine with his hands holding himself up on the arm rests, he looks into my eyes and I feel my face start to get hot. He smirks when I look away and picks me up carrying me back towards the pool “Tae, I swear to God if you throw me in I will be locking you out of the hotel room so you can freeze to death!!!” he looks down at me and gives me a large smile before jumping into the pool with me in his arms. When I surface again I swim over to Tae ready to attack but he just grabs my wrists and pulls me against his body, I look at him frustrated and pouting but he just starts laughing. I get myself free from his grip and swim to the stairs. I lean myself against the pool stairs and let my legs float to the surface, Taehyung swims beside me and copies my actions. We sit like this for a while just relaxing and talking about his relationship before he somehow makes the conversation about me and my sex life, “so, how was sex for you?” Tae asks looking straight in front of himself looking at his toes. I am taken aback and reply, “well Tae, it is none of your business” he gives me a hearty laugh before saying, “C’mon Y/N, we have known each other practically our whole lives and you’re not willing to tell me how your sex life is? When even was your last relationship?”. I sigh wondering why he is so curious but talk to him about it anyway, I have known him forever so it isn’t a big deal or anything, “my last relationship was with Donivan and I think you know that” without even really thinking about my answer he replies “…and how was the sex?” I freeze and start to blush, going a deep shade of red. When Tae looks at me he notices and goes wide eyed “did you never get off with him?” he asked still wide eyed, I take a deep breath in and slowly shake my head ‘no’. I looked over and made eye contact before saying “none of them ever… er… got me off…” I looked away quickly after saying that and Tae laughed “so none of them ever pleased you, huh?”, I didn’t answer this time and just kept looking at my toes like they were the most interesting things on the planet.

Tae and I walked back to the hotel room and he wouldn’t let this go, he kept asking about it and my answer was always the same – “yes, it is true, Tae, okay, I have never orgasmed with anyone of my past boyfriends. I have never reached that high that is supposed to make you happy and feel less frustrated. Instead I am left with my sexual frustration and have never been allowed release” I am breathing heavy after my mini rant and Tae starts to walk over to me. I get a little nervous so I keep stepping back as he steps forwards before my back hits the wall of our shared room. He slowly brushes his fingertips up my bare arms leaving goose bumps in its wake. His hands end at my shoulders but he cups my cheeks and leans down for a kiss, he kisses me sweetly at first but as soon as I return the kiss it turns into a needy, sex filled one. His tongue licks my bottom lip asking for access but I have never been one to give in so easily, he growls against my lips before putting his thigh in between my legs and moving it towards my centre. The friction makes me gasp and he enters his tongue into my mouth pulling a moan from my lips which he swallows. He pulls away from me to look me in the eyes before rubbing his thigh against my clothed core again, this action results in a moan louder than I expected to leave my mouth. Tae seems pleased with the sound he coerced from me but I am embarrassed to have made it and cover my mouth. He doesn’t seem as pleased with that and continues rubbing his thigh against me and taking my wrists pulling them above my head, I moan and say his name, “Tae~~” he looks down at me with hooded eyes and a lust filled expression that I no doubt reflected back at him, “yes, kitten? ~”. The little pet name makes me even more aroused and I let out a little moan as he said it, he smirks at my reaction and leans down to capture my lips in another captivating kiss. I pull away from him and he seems displeased, I look up at him and ask “Tae, what are you doing? We shouldn’t be doing this” he smiles sweetly before saying “I am helping, I am going to help my best friend with her sexual desires and then we are going to talk about this after you can’t even stand anymore”, I go to say something but he is rubbing his thigh against me and it comes out as more of a strangled moan. He looks at me with sincerity and says “Y/N, trust me,” he pauses and then continues “kitten, let me take care of you tonight”, I don’t break eye contact with him and peck him on the lips. He takes my actions as consent and kisses me again full force. Tae runs his hands down my back and reaches under my thighs lifting me up and walking over to the bed. He drops me onto the bed and crawls over me.
Leaning down he connects his lips with the crook of my neck, sucking hickies into my skin. He reaches a particularly sensitive spot causing me to moan and rub my thighs together for friction. The action doesn’t go unnoticed by Tae and I can feel him smirking into my neck, he starts travelling down south and reaches into my bikini bottoms. Resting his fingers just above where I need him most, letting out a frustrated huff of air his smirk grows against my skin and he finally makes contact. He rubs his long fingers up and down my slit barely running against my clit pulling a hushed moan from my lips. Tae growls against my skin before saying, “kitten, you are so deliciously wet for me”. I don’t know how to respond but as I am about to say something he plunges his long digit inside of my walls making my moan a little too loud for my liking. He looks into my eyes with a look that could’ve made me cum right there. He watches my expression as he moves his finger in and out of me, curling it upwards resulting in sinful sounds falling from my lips. Pulling his finger from me he chuckles at my small whine of protest.
He reconnects his lips to mine reaching around my back to unclip the top half of my swimsuit. Trailing small kisses from my cheeks to my neck before he attaches his lips to my breast and grasping the other in his large hand. A loud whine falls from my lips at the assault upon my breasts, he repeats the actions swapping his hand and mouth. Satisfied with the sounds he has pulled from me and the blooming hickies on my skin he continues down my body, reaching my swimming bottoms he pulls them off and throws them somewhere in the room. He pulls my thighs apart with his large hands and licks a long stripe up my folds ensuing a large moan from my lips, he pulls me closer down to his face and sticks his tongue inside of me. Sinful slurps from the sound of Tae’s lips on my pussy fills the room and it has me on cloud nine. Removing his tongue from inside of me he moves up to suck on my clit and pushing two of his fingers inside of me. I writhe beneath him with moans and whines constantly falling from my lips, he keeps my hips still with his hand whilst the other pumps his fimgers in and out of me. The pleasure is getting to be so much and I feel myself begin to cum. I finish with a loud whine and a euphoric feeling, it is hard to believe that Tae made me have my first orgasm from only his lips and fingers.
Letting me settle down before he crawls over top of me and looks down, the desire he feels completely prominent in his eyes and pants. I wrap my hands around his neck and pull him in for a kiss whilst simultaneously moving my legs around his lower body and grinding up into him, “oh~ fuck” are the only things he says as he continues to grind down into me. His eyes settle on my face and he groans. My hands move down for his swimming trunks and begin to remove them. He looks at me to ask if I’m sure, I look at him before saying, “Tae I need you inside of me”. As if the little self-control he had left snapped he pulled his trunks off the rest of the way and threw them somewhere haphazardly across the room behind him. He lined himself up with my wet pussy and slowly begins pushing into me, he groans out “Y/N, you are so tight- ahhhh~~- when was the last time you were-ahhh~-  fucked? -ahhhh~~”. I moaned as he began slowly pushing himself in and out of me. Our moans and grunts mixing together, I began to feel myself reaching my high once again, clenching and unclenching around Tae rapidly, he began thrusting inside of me faster. He was furiously trying to make me reach my high so he could release, I began letting go and came around Tae’s member, hard. He quickly pulled out of me and released all over my stomach.
Collapsing beside me for a bit before he got up to get a wet towel to wash his cum off of me with. Throwing the towel across the room he fell next to me again and pulled me into his chest. We both started drifting off to sleep but this is something we have to talk about when we wake up and that frightened me.

A/N: I wrote a smut for a certain thirsty admin, I hope you all enjoyed it and I apologise if there were any spelling mistakes.

- Admin ThEcooLEsTLAdXxxXXxx69420 🤙🏻

Fate

Pairing: Thor x Reader

Summary: Thor and Reader don’t get along. Fate is about to change that.

A/N: No timelines were hurt in the making of this oneshot.

To say that you and Thor were on bad terms was an understatement. Since the day the team was formed, the two of you could never see eye to eye. It was impossible to agree on anything he said, and vice versa. You preferred to strategize, formulate a plan, and make sure to minimize as much damage as possible. He believed in the opposite: running into battle, leaving destruction in his path. He was unruly, loud, and immature to you. You were a buzzkill, pompous and too strict for his liking. The two of you collided on how to handle missions daily, and more so on how to handle life in general. Today was one of those days.

“Thor,” you snapped. You held your smashed laptop in your hand as you stomped towards him. “What did I tell you about summoning Mjolnir inside?”

Bruce took a sip of his coffee and muttered,“ Uh oh.” He briskly walked out of the room, not wanting to get in the way of your wrath. If there was anyone else scarier than a pissed off Hulk, it was you.

Thor ignored you and mindlessly twirled Mjolnir, eyes focused on the T.V. Small clips of the morning mission flashed across the screen.

Bucky looked at you, and then to Thor who was sat beside him. “He’s still not talking to you?”

Thor smiled, confirming Bucky’s question.

You glared at Thor. “Bucky, tell me, who do you think did the right thing?”

Keep reading

bts as dads: jhs

dad!bts au: kim seokjin | min yoongi | jung hoseok | kim namjoon | park jimin | kim taehyung | jeon jungkook

  • four kids: eldest son, older daughter, younger son, baby daughter
  • eldest son: jung haneul, 5 years old; older daughter: haewon, 4 years old; younger son: jung jihoon 2 years old; baby girl: jung hana, 1 month old
  • yes i fully believe hobi would pull a kardashian and make sure all of his kids’ names start with the same letter bonus if they all start with H
  • sibling dynamics up first
  • hobi’s oldest son is hobi. he is. you now have two hobi’s on your hand congratulations you might as well have named him hoseok jr because that’s what he is
  • he’s is always looking out for his younger siblings
  • the two middle children are like best friends; they all love each other but those two are especially close
  • but everyone’s favorite is baby girl jung obviously
  • i mean have you ever seen hoseok’s baby pictures?? the cutest
  • hobi is the fun dad and also the really supportive dad
  • is willing to take his kids anywhere and do anything with them if it’ll ensure their happiness
  • like if his little girl asks him to paint with her, even if he’s not a good artist the second she asks him, he’s already set up seven easels and all the watercolor paints in the world and pulled two smocks out of his back pocket
  • “dad can we go get ice cream please”
  • “haewon it’s the middle of winter and the ice cream shop is a 20 minute drive away”
  • “but dad pleeaaaaaaase!!”
  • “……ok get in the car but don’t tell ur mom”
  • you’d find out anyway but you shouldn’t be surprised hobi could never say no to his kids
  • i can see him taking them to the dance studio with him just to goof off or keep him company
  • they always cheer for him during dance practices with the boys
  • “gooooo daddy!!” “daddy’s the best dancer, sorry uncle kookie”
  • sometimes he teaches them old bts dances
  • he loves doing that
  • he’s so patient with them and he loves the father/child bonding time
  • and what better way to do that than doing something he loves with people he loves!!
  • he jokes that they could form their own dance squad (bts whomst?)
  • the kids are really invested in it
  • and they look up to him so much they’re so impressed
  • when they’re tired out after a session tho they just kind of come up to him and lift their hands up for upsies
  • and he can’t say no to any of them so basically it becomes a human totem pole of hoseok and his sleeping children
  • hoseok and his kids are the kind of family that roll up always looking really street chic and cool
  • they’re never matching outfits (there’s too many of them and something tells me the oldest would never agree to that)
  • and where on earth would you get matching outfits for a full grown man, a five year old, a four year old, a two year old, and a toddler??
  • that’s right no where
  • but everyone is still always well dressed and ready to pose
  • he never shuts up about his kids he loves his kids so fucking much
  • they’re all he talks about
  • “jimmie look at this video of hana eating applesauce isn’t she so cute?”
  • “hobi you showed me this yesterday”
  • “oh….. she’s still cute jiminie”
  • like yoongi, he probably takes his kids to the recording studio when he can
  • maybe not the babies, but definitely his two oldest
  • he loves seeing them dance around and play with the beats even though they have no idea what they’re doing  bc they’re so fucking cute
  • the oldest two favor uncle yoongi probably because they see him the most in the recording studio
  • and we all know how much yoongi cares for hobi just imagine how sweet he’d be for his kids
  • uncle joon and uncle jin babysit the littles tho
  • just imagine hobi playing a demo beat and letting his oldest son in the recording booth and he’s just like “haneul go!!”
  • and his little baby boy is in there spitting pure fire about his favorite cartoons and shit it’s so cute
  • tbh he’d probably sample his kids’ voices on a few tracks like background vocals here and there
  • you know how jay z released blue ivy’s freestyle recently……… that’s a hobi move expect that
  • hoseok is really big on family time especially bc you guys are such a big fam
  • probably stuff like fam lunches on saturdays and dinners and stuff
  • also because he loves his kids and they’re so cute with each other and you and just in general
  • wow hobi loves his kids
  • and tbh they’ll probably end up being daddy’s kids
  • if you thought you were getting at least one mama’s boy or mama’s girl then think again
  • because hoseok’s life revolves around his kids, but his kids’ lives also revolve around him
  • the kind of dad to want to document everything
  • “hobi why have you been walking around with a recording camera for the past week??”
  • “because jihoon is gonna say his first words soon i can feel it and i HAVE to get it on video”
  • lowkey does it because they’re cute, highkey does it so he can have tons of footage to look at when he’s missing them on tour
  • overall he’s just really supportive of his kids and invested in their happiness 24/7 and will do absolutely anything on this earth to make sure they’re always happy and smiling
Playing Wrong Pt. 6

Pairing: You x Bang Yongguk

Genres: Fluff, mention of mafia stuff and smut

Word Count: 2,333

Short Summary: Yongguk made you completely forget about your boyfriend. His behavior changed completely. Positively. He was friendly, laughed with you and took care of you, especially when you got sick. Do you really wanted to see him dead? After you gotten to know his real side?

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18E | 19E

Originally posted by seventeevee

For the first time since you were here, Yongguk sat down during breakfast next to you. He still wasn’t talking, but it was already an improvement, that he wasn’t death glaring you from the other side of the table. From time to time you glanced over at him and you had to admit, he was quiet handsome. You always thought that, but he was an cold idiot towards you, so you haven’t thought much about it. 

“Y/N.”, he called out your name and you quickly looked away, making him chuckle. “Yah! I saw you looking at me. Don’t look away now when I want to talk to you.” You carefully looked up again, trying your hardest not to blush. You thought he would freak out, that you basically checked him out, but he only had an adorable gummy smile. This clearly wasn’t going how you planned it. You and your boyfriend wanted to have him dead and you shouldn’t fall for him. He noticed your thoughts drifted away once again, so he carefully tapped you on the shoulder. “Are you okay?”

You shook your head before answering. “Yeah, I am. What do you want to talk about?”

“I’m going to workout now and afterwards I will spend the rest of the day in the office again. You don’t have to sit around all day bored. If you like you can join me in the office or do something with the members, if they aren’t busy.”

Did he really just asked you to spend time with him?! “But when I join you in the office, I will also only sit around and watch you work.”

Yongguk embarrassedly scratched his neck. “True that. Still you can come every time you like.”

“Okay.”, you nodded and Yongguk stood up, walking upstairs. You continued to sit here for solid 5 minutes, thinking about what the fuck just happened. That couldn’t have been the Bang Yongguk right now. Did he change places with his older brother somehow and you didn’t notice it? Was he on drugs?


I looked at myself in the mirror and wondered what is wrong with me. I’m a cold hearted mafia leader, supposed to kill people, but instead I’m falling for her. The way she acts, has such an innocence. I just want to protect her. She clearly had an influence on me. It’s the first time since probably years I laughed like that. The first time I talked more than a sentence, that isn’t only about business. I let out a sad laugh. How dumb am I to think she wants something from a guy that keeps her here? A guy that kills people for living and sleeps with other girls, because of loneliness? I quickly stripped of my sleeping clothes and put on my sport outfit, before making my way downstairs again. I looked if she still was in the dining hall, but she was’t, so I entered the fitness studio and started my exercises.


Once again you found yourself in bed, when Yongguk came back from working out. You thought once more about how the things the last few days developed, how you could get close to Yongguk, how you could use the informations you found out against him. What surprised you a lot is the fact, that you aren’t even missing your boyfriend and his members that much. However you were ripped out of your thoughts when Yongguk entered the room. Shirtless. Sweaty. At first he didn’t even notice you were there, but in the reflection of the mirror he saw you staring at him, so he turned around.

“Do you like what you see?”, he asked, giving you a wink.

Not knowing how to react to his straight forwardness, you just sat there and continued to stare at his muscular arms, chest and built abs. You may not see it when he wore a shirt, but he defiantly had muscles. And he was way more muscular than your boyfriend.

Yongguk broke the silence laughing. “It’s okay. At least you don’t scream at me this time.” He went to the bathroom, locked the door and soon you could hear the water being turned on.


Once again it was time for lunch. Your plan to eat with Junhong was destroyed, when he, Daehyun and Youngjae went out. Only Yongguk, Himchan and Jongup were left. To be completely honest, you were still a little afraid from Jongup and not at all close with Himchan, so the only solution was to go to Yongguk. He said you could visit him anyways.

You knocked on his door and waited until he grumbled some kind of answer back. You walked in and saw him sitting at his big wooden table, going through papers. He didn’t look up for once. Not until you cleared your throat and said his name. His head shot up and he stared apologizing. “Sorry, Y/N. I thought you were someone from the cleaning personal. I’m sorry.”

That was a new side to him. Bang Yongguk apologizing. You shook your head. “It’s okay. I’m hungry and I didn’t want to go alone.” Yongguk simply nodded. “Let me guess. You are still scared of Jongup and have never talked much with Himchan, so you came to me.” He said these words, leaning back in his chair, looking at you expectingly.

“How?”, you managed to stammer out and he just laughed. 

“I see it was a good guess then. Let me finish singing these documents and then I’ll go with you, okay?” You nodded and he went back to his work, you still standing around in the room awkwardly. This time Yongguk noticed your uneasiness and looked up once more. “You know that you can sit down?” How should you tell him, you didn’t want to sit on the places he most likely had sex. However Yongguk meant to figure out what your problem was. “Because you saw me having sex with that girl, right?” Maybe you were wrong about Jongup being scary. It was him. Somehow you managed to stammer out a yes. You expected him to laugh at you or make fun, but Yongguks reaction was completely different. He got up from his chair, signaling you with his hand to come over and sit down there. When you still haven’t moved he spoke up. “You can sit there. I haven’t had any sex there and I can sign these standing.” You slowly walked over and sat down in his chair, being amazed how unbothered he was by this situation. You watched him reading his papers and signing them for a while, until he put all documents together. “Come on. Let’s get food.”


Sleeping that night was hard for you. You turned from left to right and from right to left, but Yongguk didn’t wake up. He really was a heavy sleeper. Your head hurt to fucking much to sleep and you constantly felt like throwing up. Not wanting to wander around in the mansion in the middle of the night, you continued with your endless turning, until you fell asleep at one point. Yongguk woke up in the morning, letting you sleep. He simply thought you were tired and needed your sleep. However when the clock hit 10 am he decided it was now time to wake you up.

“Y/N, wake up.” His voice so close to your ear caused your head to hurt even more, so you grabbed his pillow and put it over your head. Yongguk had a mental fight with himself if he should shake you awake or not, simply being afraid you would be freaked out by him again, when he really tried his best after yesterday to make a good impression. After his thinking didn’t bring him to any conclusion, he just did it. He softly tapped on your shoulder, shaking you a little. “Y/N. Come on. Get up.” The vomiting feeling came back and you pushed his hand away, jumping out of bed and running into the bathroom. Poor Yongguk already thought he had fucked up again, until he heard you vomiting. He quickly got up and went to the bathroom, carefully squatting down next to you and rubbing your back. He continued to rub your back and held your hair together, until you were finished. “Why haven’t you told me you were feeling sick?”, Yongguk asked. Instead of scolding you, he tried to speak as silent and sooting as possible. “I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“Didn’t want to wake me up? Are you telling me you feel bad since tonight?!” Carefully you nodded and he sighed. “Can you walk by yourself?” You nodded once again and Yongguk helped you standing up. However walking didn’t went that well. If Yongguk wouldn’t have caught you in time, you would probably have hit the ground. In one swift motion he picked you up and carried you to the bed. If you weren’t sick, you would probably freak out about the fact he was carrying you. He softly laid you down on the bed, readjusting your pillow and pulling the blanket over you, before sitting down next to you. “Y/N, you exactly need to tell me now what is hurting.”

“My head, my ears and my stomach.”

Yongguk pulled his phone out of his pocket, dialing a number. “Chinmae, come over…Y/N is sick…No that’s not one of my girls…GOD DAMN IT JUST COME OVER AND TAKE CARE OF HER!” He ended the call and put his phone away, looking at you. “I called out doctor. He will come over soon and take care of you.” He waited for an answer, but he didn’t get one. You fell asleep again.

You woke up when you heard Yongguk talking to someone. It was a male voice you didn’t knew. That had to be the doctor he was talking about. You tried to open your eyes for a second, but it hurt just way too much, so you kept them close. You felt the bed dip down next to you and Yongguk carefully rubbed your arm. “Y/N, the doctor is there.” The bed dipped down on the other side and that male voice talked to you. “Hello, Y/N. I’m Chinmae. The personal doctor of Mr. Bang. He called me over, because you aren’t feeling well.” You nodded in confirmation. “Mr. Bang already told me you vomited into the bathroom and were in pain all night. Is that true?” You nodded again. “I need you to tell me your current symptoms.”

“My head hurts really bad and it get’s more worse when I open my eyes, my ears burn and my stomach is in pain.”, you answered the doctors question. 

“I know it hurts, but I need you to sit up and open your eyes.” You carefully opened your eyes and saw a concerned looking Yongguk and a guy, that was probably in his late 50ties. You slowly sat up and leaned against the headboard. Chinmae did all his tests with you and told you to lay down again, before he searched something in his bag and handed it over to Yongguk. “Mr. Bang, Y/N has a virus. It’s not that bad and should be over in 3 days, if she takes these pills 4 times a day. Please make sure she does. And…I don’t know how close you are with her, Mr. Bang, but…if you don’t want to get sick,…no kissing or sex for the next 3 days.” You could hear out of the doctors voice, he was feeling uneasy at the end, but Yongguk seemed to not care. “I will make sure she takes these and we aren’t in a relationship.”


Three days passed now and you were feeling a lot better, but still a little sick. You were surprised how lovely Yongguk cared for you. He always brought you your medicine, making sure you would take it. At the first day you woke up again from one of your naps and found Yongguk with his Mac in bed next to you.

“What are you doing here?”, you asked him. He jumped a little at your voice and closed his Mac, placing it away and turning over to you. “I was working.”

“I saw that, but why here?”

“Because I have to take care of you.”, he carefully brushed a hair-strain away from your forehead, before speaking up once more. “How are you feeling?”

“Still bad.”

Yongguk gave you a genuine smile. “Do you think you can eat a little? It would be good, because you are taking medicaments.” 

“A little, yes.” Yongguk nodded and got up. “I will be back in 5 minutes.” And Yongguk kept his promise. Not even 5 minutes later he returned with tea and soft waffles for you. You sat there and ate in silence, Yongguk watching you. You offered him a bite, but he declined. After your meal you fell asleep again.

The second day was similar. Yongguk worked in bed next to you, brought you food to your room, made sure you take your medicine and you slept in between. You were still feeling bad, but already much better. That didn’t change that fact, that you needed a lot time to convince him, that he can go on his meetings and doesn’t have to sit next to you all the time.

On the third day your stomach and ear pain was already gone and only your head hurt a little. After what felt like hours of begging Yongguk gave in and went outside in the garden with you for a short time. The argument of getting fresh air defeated his opinion of you strictly staying in bed. You never thought Yongguk would care that much about you and it changed your opinion positively about him. Do you really wanted to see that guy dead, just because of a stupid thought of your boyfriend. He was way more than a cold hearted mafia leader and you got to know this side.

Nu’est

It’s about time I voiced out my feels. Having been actively following Nu’est for the past 5 years now, initially hearing that they will be participating in produce 101 really took me aback. I was angry at Pledis and their consistent mismanagement of the boys. I was upset that Pledis really did seem like they were throwing Nu’est out into the trash. But most importantly, I was concerned at how the Nu’est members each felt. Throughout the years, I’ve seen the smiles fade and the laughter become less. It’s amazing when you look at the boys and assume that they are much older than they actually are. That’s just how much they have matured. Here’s the thing though. Nu’est, through ups and downs never did stop smiling. They never gave up, never gave in. There’s a sort of glimmer in each members eyes as I watch them on Produce 101; a sort of desperation. As a long-term fan of theirs, it absolutely breaks my heart when I hear them say things like “I want to be like them,” or “I need to work harder.” 

Nu’est has a very special place in my heart. I really don’t think any other group could ever replace them. Keeping up with Produce 101 and seeing the members growth and improvement absolutely fills my heart. For once, people are actually recognizing them. Our Minki is more than just his looks; he has many other charms to offer to remind us that he deserves to be where he is. Our Dongho is more than someone who appears to be rough on the outside; he has a heart of gold who just wants to achieve his dreams of becoming a singer. Our Minhyun is more than just his quiet persona; he wants to show the world what he is capable of and that he has not failed. Our Jonghyun is more than the tears he has shed and the weight he has carried on his shoulders; he puts others before himself and consistently proves to us that he is a capable and trusting leader. Our Aaron who is not participating in the show is more than just a character on the sidelines; through much sweat and tears shared I’m sure he is actively supporting the boys, no matter how quietly. 

It truly warms my heart to see the amount of love that Nu’est is receiving. I cannot tell you guys how long it has been since I’ve seen the Nu’est tag so active. I am so happy to see that the members are all ranking well. Especially to our pure kind hearted leader, Kim Jonghyun. He truly deserves first place, and I am so happy that he is finally being recognized. 

Thank you guys so much for loving Nu’est

3

I’m at my grandparents’ house taking care of my grandmother (she broke her foot) and I’m going through all the boxes of old pictures and I have to say that I am so glad that these exist. I don’t think I realized until now how much I had forgotten what my dogs looked like and how my grandparents looked when I was a baby. It’s really amazing how much joy a picture can bring you.

So don’t let anyone tell you to stop taking pictures and “live in the moment”. Some moments are meant to last and when you’re older you’re going to be so thankful that you remembered to take pictures all those years ago. It’s more than worth pausing for the 5 seconds it takes to pull out your phone and snap a picture. It’ll last forever if you let it.

i’m just gonna be out there and say this. take it in any way you’d like to interpret it, but please at least read to the end, because i know this affects most people on here in some way.

when i was 11 years old i found tumblr.

it was especially fun for me because everything was new and fresh and i hadn’t seen anything like it and it was finally a place for me to hang out and talk about things i loved with other people who liked similar things.

i got totally, completely sucked in, and i’m just going to outright admit that i loved every little bit of it.

i met my first online friend there. his name was mike and he’s long gone, but he was everything to me and if i could go back and talk to him and change what i had done to him, i absolutely would.

he was older and cooler and he was trans and gay and 17 and he helped me figure out so many things about myself that i hadn’t known before.

we roleplayed together every single day and we were the best of friends.

everything was good for a while, in my head. i think it was more of the matter that i hadn’t thought through what was happening, i had let it completely consume me.

everything went to my head, and i started getting horrible thoughts and doing horrible things that i won’t even begin to list here, because as far as i knew, tumblr was right. everything i knew before tumblr was wrong, and my family was wrong, and my teachers were wrong. nobody understood me or what i was going through.

i got manipulative and started doing horrible things to people without realizing.

mike got sick of my bullshit really quick.

i kept making excuses and crying and guilt-tripping and eventually mike told me something i would never forget.

mike told me i needed to stay a kid, and tumblr wasn’t going to help me do that. 

and i kept telling him i didn’t know what he meant, and he would just tell me to come back when i figured it out for myself.

mike was an extremely patient person and i had worn his patience thin and that said something.

it didn’t say something when i was 11 years old, but it does now.

and even if you’re staring at the screen right now, wondering what the point to my telling you all of this is, the point is that when you’re a kid and you look up to all these internet icons and you get engaged in everything they do and want to be just like them,

tumblr isn’t a good place.

because false fame goes straight to your head and corrupts you from the inside.

and even as someone 5 years older with a completely different set of interests and new labels and new knowledge, i can tell you right now that it’s still getting to me now, just like it did when i was younger, and it’s not even an age thing.

tumblr’s mindsets just aren’t good for people in general.

i’ve gone through so many usernames, so many deactivated blogs, so many sets of pronouns and labels and names, and i’m telling you right now.

as someone who’s gone through so many friends–who’ve all resembled mike in more ways than one–tumblr’s way of thinking isn’t good for kids.

something needs to change.

The Chase (Chapter 3)

Originally posted by winchester--bros-4-life

Originally posted by somedaysiamgayerthanusual

Originally posted by evenbechnasheim

Originally posted by ssaalexblake

A/N: Sorry this took so long, I was having some trouble coming up with ideas. I worked really hard on this. If anyone wants to be tagged just send me a message! Also feel free to send me suggestions. Enjoy!

Summary: Sam, Dean, and you meet up with Reid and the others and you explain what all you guys were doing in the house. Reid and you get also get a little closer.

Warnings: Cussing.

Word Count: 1202.

     As soon as Reid and I make it downstairs, I sit down on the couch alongside Dean and Sam. Looking at the agents, I could tell that they weren’t as happy and understanding about finding us sneaking around as Dr. Reid was.

     The first person I noticed was the big, buff black guy was glaring at Dean, most likely because Dean just talked back to him. The guy looked to be about mid-thirties. He looked like he could take Dean, too, but Dean just sat there leaning back with a big smirk on his face. 

Originally posted by thegreatficmaster

     The next person that I noticed was a man that looked a little older, who had a constant frown on his face. The dude had black hair and a pointed face. He wasn’t glaring, but he looked like he was trying to figure the three of us out. 

     Blondie seemed to be enjoying this, as she was grinning as she watched the guys being uptight about all of this. So did the black haired woman. They both seemed to not be too upset about this. A guy who seemed to be about 60+ years old looked to be neutral about it too. 

     “Want to try to explain what the hell you guys were doing searching the victims house and impersonating FBI agents?” The serious looking man said, crossing his arms. 

     “Alright, okay fine!” I say, already getting tired of Dean and black guy’s staring contest. Smirking I add, “Just tell us your names first.” 

     Blondie is the first to speak, “Jennifer Jareau. Most people call me JJ.” She states as she hops up on the table and crosses her legs. 

     “Hotch.” The next person says. What surprised you though, was that the person was the serious black haired guy. His facial expressions never changed once while he spoke and he still stood there with his arms crossed, not getting as comfortable with the situation as JJ was. 

     Then black dude spoke up, “Derek Morgan.” Derek’s voice was really deep and kind of raspy. He seemed to be relaxing now that I had agreed to explaining everything. He was leaning against the counter that was part of the breakfast bar which lead to the kitchen. Reid was also standing next to him, smiling like a 5 year old who was told to go bat-shit crazy in a candy store. 

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Wonho - Overwatch (5)

Part 1 – Part 2 – Part 3 –  Part 4

Originally posted by sweetramenwonho


“Thanks so much for inviting me out here today.  It was really fun.” You said as you started gathering your belongings.

“Wait, where are you going?’ Wonho asked walking over to you.

“Home?”

“Oh, well I thought you’d stay for lunch. I already had it ordered.  Fried chicken and black bean noodles right?” he asked.

“I don’t know whether to be freaked out or touched that you know my favorite food.” you said, following behind him to a different room.

“Touched. That’s the feeling you’re looking for.  It’s me that’s freaked out that you eat this stuff on a regular basis.” Wonho said in a teasing tone.

“Oh, I’m sorry.  We can’t all be health food freaks like you.  Though, I guess that’s not a bad thing.  With your line of work, the healthier you are, the better.”

“If my line of work is being a human, then yes.” Wonho said, opening the door to what looked like a conference room.

“A human?” you asked, confused.

“Yeah.  It doesn’t really matter what my line of work is.  Healthy is a good thing, for everyone.”

“Okay, you got me there.” you admitted.

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Game On

Requested by @kookiemonztah

Dating Abby one shot?

Title : Game On

Pairing : Abby Sciuto x Reader

POV : Reader

Word count : 1069

Beta reader : @lostdreamsanddeadroses who has ruined me by introducing me to Star Trek.

Inspired by this headcannon by @of-badges-and-guns

Originally posted by eat-chocolate-it-will-help


You thought you knew your girlfriend pretty well. Sure you’d only been dating for 5 months, but that is definitely enough time to learn someone’s interests. Abby liked many things: heavy metal, weird stuffed animals, cool artifacts, Caf Pow, yoga, the color black, Caf Pow. Did I mention Caf Pow? The point is you knew her well, so when she texted you that you would be playing games for date night your suspicions ranged from harmless to sexual. However you did not expect to be dragged 2 hours away into a dingy bowling alley, forced to wear custom made black lace bowling outfits and be loosing to your girlfriend by 10 points.

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predictions for stranger things season 3

Hey I know that no one asked but here I am, back on my bullshit

-a bigger time jump, like 2-3 years, because the kids are looking older and next season it’ll be hard to believe that 15 year old Finn is still like 13, they’re all changing so much.

- finding 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, and 10. If eleven is not the only one from the labs still alive, I’m sure we’ll find out what the rest of them are up to.

- mike and Lucas becoming very distant. They’ve had a big fight in both seasons now, and even though mike seems to be cool with Max, eleven doesn’t seem to be. I could see that causing a rift between them, and if there is a time jump I can see them having a falling out, and Will seems to pick Mikes side, and Dustin’s caught in between.

- the season taking place either over Christmas time again or over the summer, and Steve being home from college. I see him going to college now that he and Nancy are pretty much over. Or, if the season is during the fall or spring, the kids calling Steve and him coming home just to help them.

- Joyce and hopper, of course.

- eleven getting picked on at school when she starts going, but eventually begins to fit in a little more. The boys didn’t seem to be getting bullied anymore (besides will but that seemed to stop when they were at the dance) so maybe them not being complete outcasts will help her fit in.

- eleven playing dig dug and accidentally beating Max’s score

- Nancy and Jonathan hookup a lot but they’re both too dumb and shy to actually start a relationship, and it kinda makes their friendship weird.

- or, if they do more than a year time jump, Nancy and Jonathan go to different schools, or Nancy goes and he doesn’t, and they lose touch but end up together to help defeat the shadow monster

- Eleven and Will becoming really really close because of their experiences. They haven’t had much screentime together yet and with mike and el being together and mike and Will being best friends, I can totally see el and Will having conversations about their trauma.

- Dustin calling Steve for lady advice still. I need that in my life.

- Hawkins lab being destroyed or turning into someone completely different, and it not being a cover up for something new. Like they actually change and and the kids have to find another way to the upside down to defeat the shadow monster.

- billy dying. I just want that.

- MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH. I don’t know who and I don’t know how, but I think someone from the main group is going to die. So far we haven’t had too major of characters die, but they still were good characters (rip barb & bob). But I’m meaning like, poster for the show characters. One of the kids. One of the adults. Someone. Maybe Steve. I’d die.

out of curiosity, if you wear make up what is your daily look? and how old are you? 

when I was younger (like just going back 5 years or maybe less) I would always do full face, like every single thing you can think of I did. but as I got older, the less and less I wore because I found that it just didn’t suit me anymore and made me look ‘weird’, I literally go through phases where I hate the look of even lipstick on me and find it overpowers me and makes me look ??? just off? strange? weird? like that was me for about a year now, but just recently started not minding lipstick on me again. 

my daily looks is literally bb cream/tinted moisturizer to even out my complexion, some concealer if I look really fucking dead, highlight, light blush, mascara, brows. that’s it so I’m just curious if this is literally just a ‘me problem’ or a result of growing up and getting older 

softneil  asked:

i am in desperate need to know your favorite pynch fics

[loUD SCREAMING] okay okay lemme get the list 

Keep Talking - okay idek why I love this one so much I think I just love the ‘Ronan getting really flustered bc Adam’s accent’ headcanon

it won’t ever get old, not in my soul - he walked in on Adam naked, Adam thinks he’s straight (followed by 5 minutes of me screaming bc no Adam ur not straight are you KIDDING ME rn), popsicles. 

drift - it’s hot, adam’s shirtless, need I say more? 

lights will guide you home - started cute, ended kinda sad but no one’s dead and it was really…pretty?? in terms of writing 

Worthy Of A Crush - this was a wild ride oh man it was fucking hilarious (in other words, Adam’s an oblivious fuck)

Not His Fucking Pillow - sleepy Adam, flustered Ronan, Noah’s a little shit (FUCKING FAVE THIS FIC IS MY LIFELINE IT’S SO CUTE)

burning all the bridges - they get high, Adam feeds Ronan fries, sexytimes, good shit rh

Matchmaker Calla - calla’s done with the pining, Ronan thinks Adam’s laughing at his INCREDIBLE gayness, he’s wrong af obviously bc Adam is also incredibly gay goodbye. 

Things That Burn In The Night  - they’re drunk on the church roof AMEN HALLELUJAH 

Circles - Ronan’s in the hospital, fluffy sadness 

Hair - THIS IS SO CUTE OMFG PLS (adam: what would ronan’s hair look like? Cabeswater: *rihanna gif*)

don’t make a shadow of yourself - Ronan says something he shouldn’t have, after some useless avoiding, they make out cool

Sunblock - “put your dicks back in your pants boys” PYNCH ROADTRIP

Should Have Known Better - one promises he’ll be quiet, too bad the other decides he doesn’t like that, too bad for gansey’s and noah’s ears tbh

waltz through my bloodstream - LOUD SCREAMING THIS IS SOME GOOD SHIT RIGHT HERE GOOOOOOD SHIT (kinda poetic, kinda sad, a lot cute though 10/10 would recommend) 

What I Thought & What I Said  - I thought this was some cute pynch fluff but I just ended up sad (it’s a good fic tho, worth it)

let’s get together before we get much older -  COLLEGE AU

 Petrichor - sadness, lots of sadness, i wasn’t prepared bc i seriously didn’t realize that’s what the description meant 

This Isn’t a Heist - FAKE DATING PLS AND THANK 

A Thousand, Thousand Years - I’m not crying, you’re crying (I read this like 5 minutes after I woke up and looking back now, it was an awful idea)

 Paws and claws and kisses - pynch with kittens, the epitome of cuteness

I was looking through some screenshots of Pidge|Katie before she cuts her hair, and I noticed that she looks significantly older with her longer hair. Cutting it really de-aged her, so my personal head canon that she’s 16/17 fits a lot better now in comparison.

Also, looking at some screenshots of Shiro in random moments, he looks a LOT younger than what he normally looks/acts like. I automatically thought he was 21ish at the youngest, but now that’s the old end of things for my headcanons. All the official things right now concerning ages are only “5 teens”, so I’m thinking that Shiro and Matt were both 18, and Katie’s 2-3 years younger than her brother and brother’s friend/pilot.

But yeah….#Shidge all the way