i look inside myself and see my heart is black

moonlight [4]

summary: Never dance with a girl in red. || werewolf!bucky x supernatural!reader 

warnings: apparently i need to tag this as ‘slowest burn ever,’ BUT THE BURN ENDS HERE (kind of), mentions of blood, claiming bite, blood drinking/sharing, nothing too graphic but the content is mature

notes: two updates in two days, wow I’m on a roll. My lovely significant other @mangowoods beta’d this so if anything is totally fucked up, it’s his fault lmao. Song mentioned is Paint It, Black by Ciara. LISTEN TO THE SONG WHILE YOU READ THIS!!! Feedback is appreciated!!!

MASTERLIST || PART THREE || PART FIVE || PLAYLIST

Originally posted by buckypupbarnes

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Dark/Anti inspired music playlist

Ok, so I looked around tumblr a bit to see what i could find, and with the musics i know myself (so the styles of music i like are heavily represented here), i decided to make a big playlist, along with some piece of lyrics from them, that suit Dark and Anti pretty well in my opinion. Some of them are not there for the lyrics, but of the ambiance of the song, that are Anti/Dark-ish to me. 

In bold are the songs that i think are AMAZINGLY ANTI/DARK-ISH like… It’s almost that they were made for them. So here we go! 

And do not hesitate to suggest other songs I missed, i may update this post from time to time when i find more songs! :3

@darkiplier-support-group @anti-support-group

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‘And She Was’ (Simon x OC, Part 5)

Title: “And She Was”

Characters: Simon (The Walking Dead), Negan (The Walking Dead)

Tags/Warnings: Explicit language, implied rape (it’s only a short flashback, please don’t worry), eventual smut, slow burn, explicit sexual content (oh yes! You got it!), masturbation, exhibitionism, Eugene

Gif Credit: GIF is not mine, credit goes to the creator!

NOTES: Savannah thinks that masturbating while Simon sleeps on the couch is a wonderful idea. Meanwhile, she can’t shake the feeling that Simon is hiding something from her. (also, god I love writing Eugene - he’s so ostentatious)

Taglist: @simons-thirst-squad @backseat-negan @neganisking @collette04 @isayweallgetdrunk @kuenie (if you’d like to be added, just let me know!)

Part one!

Part two!

Part three!

Part Four!


I wake up screaming in the dark. Hands smothering my mouth, pushing me down into layers upon layers of foliage, swallowing me and shuddering around my body. The stench of wet pine seeping from my rain-soaked hair, dripping into my mouth, past clammy fingers trying to claw my lips closed. His eyes blistering in the gloom.

“No.” The ever-present rage churning in my gut. “You did this – you deserve to die-”

“I was just taking what’s mine.” His fingers squeeze my wrists until I hiss through my teeth, thrashing in the undergrowth, the crickets chirruping happily somewhere far away. Like an audience to his assault. He pushes my face into the dirt and I taste grass in my mouth. “I’m sure she liked it.”

I scream, lashing out underneath him, kicking my legs. But he sinks his body weight on top of me and the ground swallows us both, a living, digesting stomach stinking of the dead.

I kick something soft. Gasp for breath but I find that I cannot draw any air, and I start to panic.

My eyes fly open as I jerk awake, blinking in the pale blue light of dawn.

Fuck. That wasn’t real?

I shudder, my skin beading with sweat under the clothes and the covers. For a moment I lie, prostrate and disorientated, struggling to remember where I am. Why the ceiling fan looks so unfamiliar. Why there’s the sound of calm, steady breathing coming from the couch. I roll over onto my other side, trying to shake the cobwebs of the nightmare from my mind. Patting down the covers, I crane my neck to see Simon, fast asleep.

“Raoul.” I whisper to myself, rubbing the sleep from my eyes and blinking to keep myself awake. I inhale and almost smell the scent of the man from my dream. Prop myself up and simply breath for several minutes, trying to calm the rabbit-fast palpitation of my heart. “But he’s not here. You’re safe. Safe as you can be.”

I watch the man in front of me as my panic dissipates and ebbs into awareness of my situation. The wound, the doctor, the man in the leather jacket. And him. The stranger who made me a Spanish cocktail in the middle of the night. His back is to me, the sheets tangled around his hips and long legs. I was right when I said he was too long for the couch - his feet dangle over the edge and twitch in sleep. Pale beams of morning-light illuminate the long-toed feet and ankles that melt into muscular calves. He has one arm over his face, and his t-shirt has hitched itself up around his middle. I can see a sliver of tanned back, and it’s enough to make all the heat in my body flood between my thighs.

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Paint It, Black
The Rolling Stones
Paint It, Black

The Rolling Stones - Paint It, Black

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors any more, I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by, dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

I see a line of cars and they’re all painted black
With flowers and my love both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a newborn baby, it just happens every day

I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door I must have it painted black
Maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts
It’s not easy facing up when your whole world is black

No more will my green sea gord turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee this thing happening to you
If I look hard enough into the setting sun
My love will laugh with me before the morning comes

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors any more, I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by, dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

Hmm, hmm, hmm,..

I wanna see it painted, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black

Yeah!

Hmm, hmm, hmm…

Ain’t No Grave (Can Hold My Body Down) - A Re-Animator Southern Gothic AU Fanmix

1. Devil’s Backbone - The Civil Wars

Don’t care if he’s guilty, don’t care if he’s not
He’s good and he’s bad and he’s all that I’ve got
Oh Lord, Oh Lord, I’m begging you please
Don’t take that sinner from me

2. Bottom of the River - Delta Rae

The wolves will chase you by the pale moonlight
Drunk and driven by a devil’s hunger
Drive your son like a railroad spike
Into the water, let it pull him under
Don’t you lift him, let him drown alive
The good Lord speaks like a rolling thunder
Let that fever make the water rise
And let the river run dry

3. My Boy Builds Coffins - Florence + the Machine

My boy builds coffins, he makes them all day
But it’s not just for work and it isn’t for play
He’s made one for himself
One for me too
One of these days he’ll make one for you

4. Blood On My Name - The Wright Brothers

Not a spell gonna be broken
With a potion or a priest
When you’re cursed you’re always hoping
That a prophet would be grieved
Oh, Lazarus
How did your debts get paid?
Oh, Lazarus
Why you’re so afraid?

5. Ain’t No Grave - Johnny Cash

Well, look down yonder, Gabriel
Put your feet on the land and sea
But Gabriel, don’t you blow your trumpet
Until you hear from me
There ain’t no grave
Can hold my body down

6. Save My Soul - Blues Saraceno

So he hands me a bible
To take my last stand
But the devil he done ignore me
While the doctor does all he can
He said:
I can’t take you to heaven
I can’t save your soul
I can’t promise forever

7. Some Misunderstanding - Gene Clark

There’s been some misunderstanding
And I’d like to make it right
Both of us need inspiration
And the timing must be right

8. 7 Devils - The Goddamn Gallows

Old Mister Shadow,
Old Mister Rain,
Seven devils coming, whispering my name
Old Mister Shadow,
Old Mister Vain,
Trying to outrun you on the graveyard train

9. Paint It, Black - The Rolling Stones

I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door I must have it painted black
Maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts
It’s not easy facing up when your whole world is black

10. I Will Never Die - Delta Rae

Old heat of a raging fire
Come and light my eyes
Summer’s kiss to electric wire
But I’ll never die
I will never die
You can bury my body but I’ll never die

11. Lose Your Soul - Dead Man’s Bones

Oh,
You’re gonna lose your soul, tonight
You’re gonna lose your soul,
You’re gonna lose your soul,
Tonight, tonight.

12. Girl With One Eye - Florence + the Machine

I took a knife and cut out her eye
I took it home and watched it wither and die
Well, she’s lucky that I didn’t slip her a smile
That’s why she sleeps with one eye open
That’s the price she paid
I said, hey, girl with one eye
Get your filthy fingers out of my pie
I said, hey, girl with one eye

I’ll cut your little heart out cause you made me cry

13. Stand By Me - MONA

When the night has come
And the land is dark
And the moon is the only light we’ll see
No I won’t be afraid
Oh, I won’t be afraid
Just as long as you stand, stand by me

14. Blackbird Song - Lee DeWyze

Pack your things
Leave somehow
Blackbird song 
Is over now
Mouths are dry
River runs
Hands are tied 
Preacher’s son

15. Grounds for Divorce - Elbow

I’ve been working on a cocktail called “Grounds For Divorce”, whoa
Polishing a compass that I hold in my sleep, whoa
Doubt comes in on sticks, but then he kicks like a horse, whoa
There’s a Chinese cigarette case and the rest you can keep
And the rest you can keep
And the rest you can keep
There’s a hole in my neighbourhood
Down which of late I cannot help but fall

16. Landfill - Daughter

Throw me in a landfill
Don’t think about the consequences
Throw me in the dirt pit
Don’t think about the choices that you make
Throw me in the water
Don’t think about the splash I will create
Leave me at the altar
Knowing all the things you just escaped

17. Sympathy for the Devil - The Rolling Stones

Please allow me to introduce myself
I’m a man of wealth and taste
I’ve been around for a long, long year

Stole many a man’s soul and faith

18. The Ghost Who Walks - Karen Elson

She looked at him with pleading eyes
He softly spoke,
“My dear, the love has died”
And then he muffled her desperate cries
Under the moonlight

19. Vampire Lake - The Builders and the Butchers

Oh, vampire lake
Where Dracula can teach you how to bite
And you can walk across the land by moonlight
And live eternally
And it takes a bite on me
Resurrect my body
I said your neck looks good to me
I want to reinvent your body

20. Seven Devils - Florence + the Machine

Holy water cannot help you now
See I’ve come to burn your kingdom down
And no rivers and no lakes can put the fire out
I’m gonna raise the stakes, I’m gonna smoke you out
Seven devils all around me
Seven devils in my house
See they were there when I woke up this morning
I’ll be dead before the day is done

21. God’s Gonna Cut You Down - Johnny Cash

Well you may throw your rock and hide your hand
Workin’ in the dark against your fellow man
But as sure as God made black and white
What’s done in the dark will be brought to the light

You can run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Sooner or later God’ll cut you down

youtube

The Rolling Stones ~ Paint It, Black

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black

I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

I see a line of cars and they’re all painted black
With flowers and my love both never to come back

I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a new born baby it just happens every day

I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door, I must have it painted black

Maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts
It’s not easy facin’ up when your whole world is black

No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee this thing happening to you

If I look hard enough into the settin’ sun
My love will laugh with me before the mornin’ comes

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black

I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

I wanna see your face, painted black
Black as night, black as coal

I wanna see the sun flying high in the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black
Yeah!

SF&R, Chapter 33: Before the Morning Comes

Catch up on previous chapters and access the AO3 link here.


I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door I must have it painted black

Maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts

It’s not easy facing up when your whole world is black.

-“Paint it Black” as performed by Ciara


The next morning dawned cold and grey, and Nathaniel was grateful for the warmth of Cataline’s body pressed warm against his own for more reasons than one. There seemed to be something hanging in the air: a sense of foreboding that he could not quite put a name to, but that was present nonetheless. When he felt Cat stirring beside him, he bent down and brushed a kiss against her temple.

“Can you work from home today, Wildflower? Something just doesn’t feel right.”

“Mmm,” she mumbled, rolling over and picking her phone up from the bedside table, sleepily scrolling through her calendar. “I think so. I don’t see any appointments scheduled for today; just a write up for the new trade agreement with Antiva for this year’s wine. So I believe I can definitely justify not having to put on pants today.” Cat flashed him a brief smile, and his heart felt a little lighter. Still, Nathaniel could not quite shake the feeling that something was going to happen. He just didn’t know what.

In spite of the nagging sense of worry that had settled into the pit of his stomach, the day passed calmly enough. He was even able to get slightly ahead on a few projects Dorian wanted to roll out for the new year and start researching contractors for the new house, since ideally they would start breaking ground as soon as the first thaw hit. Nathaniel was just shutting his work laptop down for the day when a text came in from Thea.

T: Alistair says he has news and wants to talk. I do *not* want to talk, but I suspect I do not have much of a choice in the matter.

N: Want moral support?

T: More than that. This involves you two just as much as me. And honestly, I am not feeling so great today. I think there may have been something in the sandwich I tried to eat that is putting me off.

N: Are you ok? What time?

T: Just come up for dinner. Cullen is cooking; I just can’t right now.

N: You didn’t answer my first question.

T: I think I’ll be ok, Nate. I only ate about a quarter of the sandwich. For all I know, the bastards lied when they told me it didn’t have artichoke in the spread. You know I’m impossibly allergic.

N: Yes, it’s quite the tragedy. In any case, we’ll see you in a bit.

“Did she text you too?” He called down to the living room where Cat was wrapping up her project as well.

“Yes. I hope she hasn’t caught some stomach virus. That’s the last thing we need right now.”

“Me too,” he agreed, descending the stairs and planting a kiss on the top of her head. “But at least this means she was eating something.”

Cataline smiled at him. “Yes, silver linings I suppose. I guess if Alistair is going to be there I should change out of my pajama pants, huh?”

“Probably,” he chuckled, wrapping his arms around her as she stood and pulling her close. “Although I would prefer a third alternative…”

She swatted him playfully across the chest. “You are either the best, or the worst, I can’t decide. Come on; let’s go.”

They walked up to the main house and entered through the kitchen door. Cullen was at the stove, stirring something that smelled amazing. He gave them a small smile when they entered, but Nathaniel could tell he was worried. Thea was sitting at the kitchen table sipping a glass of water and looking peaked. Cat rushed over and placed a hand on her forehead, then shook her head.

“No fever, yet… that is something.”

Thea managed a weak smile. “I’m fine, Catkin. Just tired, I think, and if it is all the same to the rest of you I will pass on dinner.”

“For once,” Nathaniel frowned slightly, “I think that would be wise. Do you just want to go on up to bed? Anything Alistair has to say we can repeat back to you. You don’t need to sit here and suffer.”

Thea sighed, her eyelids fluttering briefly. “You know what… I think that is actually a good idea. You’ll come get me if anything important happens?”

“Of course, Starshine,” Cullen promised, scooping his wife up in his arms and ignoring her muttered protests. “I’ll tuck you in.”

Nathaniel glanced at Cataline, who looked even more disturbed than she had when she’d first seen her cousin. “What’s wrong?”

“No fever…” she mumbled. “I almost wish she had one. It would mean it is just stomach flu. She looks awful.”

“I thought that is exactly what we did not want?”

She sighed. “It would not be ideal, but the alternative-”

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Levi x Reader : From the Shadows #28 - Out

I stared at the massive wooden gates before me. Just beyond those walls was the peril like no one had ever seen. I honestly wasn’t quite sure what to expect myself. Never before have I felt so claustrophobic within these walls. I wanted to escape, and yet I knew the horror stories.

“Thirty seconds to open gate!” I heard Shadis yell over the crowd. My heart sped up.

“More wasted taxes on the Survey Corps” “How many people died on their last trip?” “Yeesh, a bunch of suicidals that group”

I couldn’t wait. Escape. Death. Escape. Death escape death escape death escape death escape dea-

“Mikasa look! It’s the Survey Corps!”

I feel like something inside me snapped. I whipped around to see a small brown haired boy and a black haired girl in a red scarf. The young boy was looking up at me, hope in his eyes. My muscles relaxed, and for some reason I found myself smiling.

“Open the gate” Shadis called from the front of our formation. I turned to the front, with a newfound determination that seemingly came out of nowhere.

I looked over to Levi, who was staring at me. He was completely pale, and his eyes screamed in terror. When he saw me glance at him, he immediately turned towards the large gate climbing towards the sky. The face he made gave me chills. He had seen the outside world, and based on that look I was in for a ride.

“ADVANCE” came the roar from Shadis, and all at once hundreds of horse hooves thundered within the small village. I faced the front, thrilled and terrified. I stared upwards at the massive arch as I passed under it. It could be the last time I saw anything like it. For the very first time, I stepped outside the walls, not having known any other world. The air smelled fresh and free, the land open and untouched by human hand. With the sunrise painting the sky red, orange, and pink, it was hard to imagine bloodthirsty monsters lurking behind each corner.

The mission was supposed to be a tedious and long one. My squads was towards the front of our formation, meant to cover the scientists, mappers, and leaders in the center of the group. With more than a kilometer between each of the squads, we were completely and utterly on our own. If we died, no one would know until we returned. We were supposed to continuously ride throughout the day, and when the sun was hidden beyond the horizon we would stop and make camp, switching off watch duty. Titans were supposedly more inactive during the night anyway. Levi looked like he was about to lose his shit. He kept glancing at me, as if to make sure I was still here. Oluo, Uwe, and Kuehl seemed completely uninterested in neither me nor Levi. As beautiful as the outside world was, this was going to be one long journey.

We rode onwards in silence. Nothing to do but get lost in my own thoughts. Why was I really here? In the Survey Corps? I had made up my mind to join them for as long as I can remember. Sure, my parents died to the titans, but I don’t even know them, nor who they are. I didn’t have a bad childhood. It wasn’t the best of situations, but others have had it worse. Was the feeling of vengeance towards my parents really great enough to keep me fighting on when all seems lost? I looked over to Levi, his black hair blowing with the wind, staring unrelentingly forward. What was his motive? What kept him going? Revenge? Hope?

Gorgeous colors filled the sky as night drew near. It looked like something out of a dream. Maybe that’s all this is. A dream.

“Alright,” Kuehl called out, “We’ll set up camp here for tonight. Uwe, I’ll have you on the first shift. Uluo, the second. I’ll take the third.”

As far as I could tell, she purposefully didn’t put Levi or I on a shift. If she would have, we all could have gotten more sleep. Maybe it’s only because it’s our first time out. Maybe.

We stopped in the middle of a large clearing near the edge of a large forest. We were to enter the woods tomorrow according to the formation plans. We were to enter first and kill off any awaiting titans to keep the center safe. We were to remain out of the forest so we could see any possible abnormal titans from a distance.

I laid out my bedroll, and Levi laid next to me. There was a clear division amongst us. Uwe, Oluo, and Kuehl had laid their mats near each other at the very edge of the woods, and we laid ours out another twenty feet away, as far away from the forest we could get without being completely separated from the group. I had struck up a fire to keep us warm, and I did my best to fall asleep in this god forsaken hellhole. Who knows what tomorrow could hold for us? All I knew was that if I didn’t get enough sleep, I would regret it a hundred times over tomorrow, quite possibly even with my life. I cleared my thoughts and only focused on the sound of the rustling leaves before me.

Haze: Chapter Five (Luke Hemmings Imagine)

a/n: read chapter four here!

 Luke’s POV

 I hated myself. I hated myself for not getting my head straight. I hated myself for letting my temper get the best of me. I hated myself for letting people down. But most of all I hated myself for letting her slip right through my fingers. 
 
I hardly ever went to class anymore. I was afraid I would start crying at the sight of her sitting there, knowing that she had a broken heart. Believe me, I tried. I managed on one occasion to drag myself to class. Hardly putting an effort in though. Dressed in a snapback and a pair of black sweatpants, I hauled myself across campus towards the art room. Taking a deep breath before I placed my hand on the door knob, I turned it and stepped inside. There were only a few students there already, Y/N being one of them. Her head snapped up at the sound of the door opening. The hopeful look in her eyes made my heart hurt, knowing she was hoping to see me walk through the door. We made eye contact and she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. Something she only did when she was nervous, or turned on. And I think we both knew which it was for now.
   I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t stand seeing her and not wanting to fall to my knees and beg her to give me a chance. The hammering in my chest wouldn’t go away. So, I turned right around and left. I didn’t even look back because I knew that all I would see was the heartbroken look on her face. The look that mirrored the look on her face when she left me on the sidewalk. 

~~~~~~

Y/N’s POV

  Maybe I had overreacted at the party. But I couldn’t help myself. Nothing hurt more than seeing him go after another girl. I was in too deep and it was time for me to dig myself out of this love hole I’d fallen into. It wasn’t that I thought I deserved better, no Luke was too good for me. It was that I couldn’t risk getting hurt by him, the one person I cared about most. Sometimes you have to come to terms and realize that sometimes the person you love the most still isn’t the one for you. And so I was going to have to let him get on with his life and I was going to have to get on with mine. 

~~~~~~~

 I had been avoiding this encounter. I had borrowed Calum’s jeep to drive out to Luke’s fraternity so I could grab a few things. I was kicking myself for leaving so many of my beloved items in his bedroom. It took everything in me to raise my hand and knock on the door. I was praying that he was out and that one of his frat brothers would answer the door and I could get in and out as fast as possible. 
  It wasn’t Luke who answered the door. However, I would have rather seen his face than the one I was looking at. “Can I help you?” Hannah’s voice squeaked in my ears. I hardly even acknowledged her as I brushed past. This fucking asshole. I couldn’t believe I had been so stupid to think that Luke would choose me. “Y/N?” Luke’s voice sounded surprised. He looked tired, and a his hair looked as though he had been tugging at it. “It’s nice to see you’ve made your decision, Luke,” I offered a tight smile. Luke looked between me and Hannah, “What? I didn’t-” “I just came to get my stuff,” I all but whispered. Hannah was just standing next to the door, a permanent glare set on me. “Wait, Y/N,” Luke caught my elbow as I tried to walk past. I just kept my gaze on the floor. Even though I had told him not to call me princess anymore, it still felt weird to hear him say my name. I missed hearing him give me pet names that I would blush at and he would just give me that cheeky smile of his before kissing me. But I guess it was time to get over it. He let go of my arm and I continued to his room. He was hot on my trail and he leaned against the door frame as I went through his closet, grabbing my sweatshirts and other various items of clothing. “Y/N, I just want you to know that I didn’t choose her,” his voice was quiet and he followed my every move. “Then what is she doing here?” I tried to keep my voice level, bringing myself to look at him. “She just showed up,” Luke pleaded. “The same way I just showed up that night we met?” I knew I shouldn’t have said it. It wasn’t helping anything, but I couldn’t help but think out loud. “Are you crazy? No of course not! I told you I’m over her. Why won’t you believe me?” his voice cracked. “You know what Luke? Maybe I am crazy. Crazy enough to think I would ever be good enough for you. Crazy enough to think that we could be something. Crazy enough to waste my time waiting for you to fall in love with me back,” I spoke as a few tears spilled over. 
   Grabbing my stuff, I slipped past him. This time he didn’t tell me to wait. Hannah smirked at me as I walked past and just as I was about to shut the for behind me, I stopped. Looking back at her, I gave her a forced smile, “Kiss my ass bitch.” With that, I slammed the door shut and ran down the steps towards the jeep and climbing inside before letting the tears spill over. 

Third Person POV

 The door slammed shut, echoing in the awkward silence that fell over the two. Hannah looked back at Luke with shock written all over her face. There was a sound of tires screeching against pavement as Y/N pulled away. “I’m so glad she’s gone,” Hannah sighed, moving towards Luke. Luke’s head snapped up, anger set in his eyes. “Get out,” he snapped. “What? Luke, come on we were about to talk,” Hannah complained. “I said get the fuck out! I didn’t invite you here. I didn’t ask you to show up and I want you out. You and I are never going to be a thing again, okay! I am over you and I don’t want you in my life anymore so get out. Just leave me the fuck alone,” Luke finally cracked, his voice echoing off the walls. He retreated back to his bedroom, slamming the door shut as Hannah grabbed her stuff and left. 
  Luke collapsed on his bed. All the tears he had been holding in for the past few weeks finally spilt over and rolled down his face. “Fuuuuuck,” he groaned, running his hands over his face. He had never had to chase after a girl before. How do you win a girl back when she couldn’t even look at you? Luke tried to think of who her closest friends were, the ones that knew her the best. Sitting up, he wiped his eyes dry, trying to think clearly. There was always Michael, a close friend to both of them. He had to know her pretty well right? But that wasn’t good enough. And Luke knew that. He needed someone who knew her like the back of their hand, even if it meant putting his pride on the line. Luke was going to have to give a little more if he wanted to get her back. Digging his hand into his pocket, he pulled out his phone. Scrolling through his contacts he found the number he was looking for. Crossing his fingers, he prayed this would work. 

~~~~~~~

 “Hey,” Luke rubbed his hands together nervously as he walked into Calum’s apartment. “How are you doing?” Calum asked, noticing Luke’s tired state. “Awful,” Luke chuckled quietly. “Right,” Calum nodded. An awkward silence fell over the two of them. Luke cleared his throat, “Look, mate, I’m sorry I’ve been an asshole to you. I clearly have a problem with letting things go.” “You had every right to be mad at me. I want to apologize, uh, for that,” Calum scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “It’s all good. I should probably apologize to you. She’s a pretty bad fuck,” Luke gave him a crooked smile. “Can’t argue with that one,” Calum laughed, sticking his hand out, “We good?” “Yeah,” Luke smiled, shaking his hand, “We’re good. Now I really need your help.” “Right, yeah,” Calum headed towards the kitchen and pulled two beers out of the fridge. 
  “So, how badly do you want her back?” Calum asked, hoisting himself onto the counter. “Oh god, I would give anything for her to be mine. Like not just have her talk to me, but be mine for real. I want to be the one that gets to take her home very night and I can show her off and tell everyone that she’s my girlfriend and they need to keep their hands off,” Luke couldn’t fight the smile that spread across his face when he talked about Y/N. Calum tried not to laugh at the love drunk state Luke was in. As much as he and Luke had had their issues, he figured for the sake of his best friend he’d get over it and help the guy out. Plus, he couldn’t see her with anybody else.
   “She wants you to prove it to her that you only have eyes for her. But I think I have an idea,” Calum was cut off the the sound of the front door opening. “Cal?” Y/N called out. “Kitchen,” Calum called back. Luke froze in his spot. “It’s fine, dude,” Calum chuckled at him. “What’s fine?” Y/N asked, walking into the room,“Oh.” “Nothing,” Calum waved her off. “What’s he doing here?” Y/N asked Calum. “Why don’t you ask him?” Calum rolled his eyes. Letting out an annoyed sigh she turned to Luke, “What are you doing here?” “Just hanging out,” Luke shrugged, bringing the beer to his lips. “You hate him,” she reminded Luke. Luke smiled against the bottle, “Not anymore princess.” She blushed at the nickname before turning to Calum with a confused look. He offered no help, just a shrug of his shoulders and a sly smile. “Anyways, here are your keys,” she dropped Calum’s keys into his hand. Shooting one more glance at Luke, she walked out, “Bye guys!” Calum waited for the front door to shut before turning to Luke, “You’ve still got her mate.”

Back at You [smut]

Requested - shawn cheats on you with laur, you get back at him with gilinsky in spite. shawn finds out…
**********

“So you won’t be here?” I ask Shawn over the phone.

“Not tonight. But tomorrow, princess.” Shawn replies.

“Alright, then. I’ll see you tomorrow morning, I guess.” I sigh.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” I reply before hanging up. Heading back downstairs to the party, I stand on the stairs. This party was supposed to be a Welcome Home party for Shawn. And now, everything is ruined.

“Hey, Katherine, are you okay?” I turn and see Jack standing at the bottom of the stairs, his hands in the front pockets of his pants.

“No. Shawn won’t be in until tomorrow.” I tell him, going down the last three steps.

“What should we do then?” He asks me.

“I guess we should just tell everyone to go home.”

“Katherine, don’t let a party go to waste.” Jack tells me. “Come on. They brought the keg’s.” I smile and give him a hug, feeling his arms wrap around me tightly.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.” I tell him.

The party went on for a good four more hours. At around one, people started to leave. In the end, only Jack and I remained. He helped me clean up and get the place to its spotless self. Jack went to the back to go throw out the trash. Before I went upstairs to take off my outfit, a knock on the door caught my attention. Thinking someone must have left a purse or a phone, I go to the door and open it. To my surprise, there’s no one there. I go to close the door but stop when I see a large yellow envelope sitting on the welcome mat. I bend down to get it, and look around too see if anyone had left this package for me. No one.

Closing the door with my foot, I head into the dining room and set the thick envelope down on the table. There’s no return address of any sort. I open the envelope and spill out what was inside. Large black and white photographs fall out. I see them and instantly feel my heart sink into my stomach.

“What?” I whisper to myself, picking up a photo with shaky hands. In black and white, I see Shawn holding hands with none other than his ex-girlfriend, Lauren. He’s starring at her happily and lovingly. I drop it and pick up another photograph. They’re kissing in a car - his car. She’s in the drivers seat, him in the passenger, and he has a hand on her neck. Photo after photo, I feel my heart drop over and over and over again. But the next photo makes tears fall.

The photo is taken from a high angle, zoomed in on a window. She’s pressed up against the glass window, her hands on the glass as her mouth is open wide and her eyes shut. Shawn can be seen standing behind her a hand in her hair, his other hand on the glass window.

“Katherine?” I quickly hide the photographs and wipe away my tears as Jack walks in with a bottle of tequila and two shot glasses. “Look what I found.” He smirks, walking towards me. I stand up and take a shot glass from him.

“What should we toast to?” He asks as he pours the liquid all the way up to the top of the long shot glasses. “You and Shawn?”

“No,” I shake my head, holding up my glass to clink with his. “You and I.”

Jack smiles and clinks his shot glass against mine. “You and I.” I smile and toss the burning liquid down my throat, shaking my head as it passes down my throat.

“Another one.” I tell him.

“You sure?”

“Positive!” I smile. Another one turns into a third one and a third one turns into an eight one. Soon, Jack and I are laughing over nothing. I’m sitting on the table in front of him, my feet resting on his thighs. I pour myself another shot, laughing and spilling some of it on my dress. “This one goes to…Shawn and Lauren.”

“Why them?” Jack asks me, laughing slightly. I quickly drink the shot and look him dead in the eyes. 

“They’re fucking.” I say, sharply placing the shot glass on the table. Jack laughs and then looks at me. 

“Wait, are you serious?” He asks me.

I slowly slide down and sit on his lap, draping my arms around his shoulders. Leaning in, I nod. “He’s fucking her.” Jack leans in and softly kisses me, unsure of his actions. When he pulls back, we attack each other. His lips press down hard on my lips as he kisses me with such force and a sense of hunger. His tongue slides in my mouth as he stands up and sits me back on the table. 

I spread my legs apart as Jack runs his hands under my dress and pulls down my underwear. My hands wander down to his pants and I hurriedly unbuckle his pants. 

“Hurry up,” I tell him, kissing down his neck. Jack places his hands under my thighs and I feel him enter me. My head rest against his chest and I open my mouth wide, slowly moaning out in pleasure. 

“Fuck,” he grunts. 

“K-keep going.” 

Jack pulls out halfway and thrust back into me. I lie back on the table and arch my back as he continuously thrusts in and out of me at a hard and fast pace.

“Katherine,” he moans. “You feel so fucking good.” 

“Faster,” I moan. He places his hands under my arched back as he thrusts into me faster and harder. Profanities and moans slip out of my mouth almost every minute. Jack sits me back up and we reconnect our lips. My hands caress his face as his thrusts become slow. I move back on the table and lie down as Jack crawls on top of me. I wrap my legs around his torso and he supports himself on his forearms. He grunts as he slowly yet forcefully pounds into me. 

 I feel the familiar knot forming in my stomach as Jack picks up speed. “Jack, oh fuck, Jack.” I pant in a high pitched moan as I release, biting onto his shoulder. A minute later, Jack cums inside me, his thrusts becoming weak and slow. He pulls out of me and I sit back up as he pulls his pants up and grabs his jacket. I laugh as I pour myself another shot of tequila. 

“We should do this again.” I yell out to him as he goes to the door. He winks at me before walking out the door. 


In the morning, I am hungover and tired. Shawn texted me that he was around the corner. That gave me just enough time to grab the photo’s and stand by the door waiting for him. I hear a car pull up and give my best fake smile. The door opens and I see Shawn come into view. He smiles big at me and I can see a hickey on his neck. 

Shawn walks towards me and as he leans in, I pick my right hand up and slap him across the face as hard as I can. His eyes go wide. “Baby, what’s wrong?” He tries to walk towards me again, but I slap him once more.

“Katherine! What the fuck?” Shawn shouts at me. I pick my hand up to slap him again but get stopped. Shawn grabs my hand in a tight grip and pushes me against a wall. 

“How was she, huh?” I ask. 

“Who?”

“Your fucking slut! How was she?!” I shout, throwing the photographs at him. Shawn lets go of my arm and I slap him again. 

“Where did you get these?” He asks me. 

“They were mailed to me. You thought I wouldn’t find out? You’re so fucking disgusting!” I tell him. 

“Katherine, she mean’t nothing.” Shawn tells me. 

“Just like Jack meant nothing to me.” I spit out at him, walking away.

“What? What the fuck did you just say to me?” Shawn asks me, following me. He grabs my arm and turns me around to face him. 

“I fucked your best friend.” I say. “Right here on the table. And let me tell you, he knew how to fuck me right.” Shawn lets go of me and pushes me to the floor. I turn around and look up at him. 

“You fucked my best friend?!” He shouts at me. I scramble to my feet and push him back. 

“You fucked your ex-girlfriend, what was I supposed to do? You’re the biggest piece of shit I have ever met. I hate you!” I say, pounding away at his chest. “I hate you, I hate you, I hate you.” My pounds get weak as I sob and collapse into Shawn’s chest. “Why? Why would you want to hurt me?”

alright this is shit because this was really weird to write and idk how to end it. i just wanted to get this one out of the way. it sucks. i know. bye!