i live with tumblr

naked stage 23

My Medusa relies on me for sustenance,

and is pissed about this…

(In Greek mythology Medusa was a monster, a Gorgon, generally described as a winged human female with a hideous face and living venomous snakes in place of hair.)

I live on the edge!!

(read - medusa = alcohol et al…)

anonymous asked:

hi, I saw you're answering questions again and I was wondering since you've been in bandom for years (where u here when TBP came out??) if u know why Pete Wentz being a rock star paid attention to someone (Ryan/Panic) sending him a link to their music... i think that story can't be true

Hi nonie :)

I lived through TBP’s release yes. Not here as in on tumblr (I joined in 2008) but as a fan. It was a beautiful time haha (a cringe fest at times too but hey it was the MySpace era!).

I haven’t really gone through my inbox yet, but I’ve just seen this and I’ve noticed questions similar to this before, so let this be an answer to all the Pete/Panic connection questions I usually get.

Pete wasn’t a rock star of any kind when he met the guys from Panic. FOB’s first major label record (Under the cork tree) came out the same year that Fever did (2005).

What happened was that he had been in the underground music scene for quite a while, particularly Chicago’s scene, first playing on different bands with Joe, and eventually with FOB and their first indie album.

Internet was starting to play a huge role on moving music around so FOB developed a big following online through a quirky online presence (Pete) and lots of touring.

Pete had a livejournal (as we all did at the time) and he would post things about the band, poetry and stuff. The online “scene” wasn’t as big as it is now and everyone “knew” each other. I followed many underground musicians LJs in the early 00s too, many of which never made it, many of which ended up as a 5 month MySpace act, there was noise, but not as much noise as now, so interesting characters stood out.

If you were into this kind of music you just knew about FOB, even if they hadn’t released a major label album yet. Like Ryan did. And he liked their music, even went to a couple of their shows and talked to them. Again something very common in underground scenes and with starting bands.

Eventually FOB was signed by a major label and headed to LA to start working on Under the cork tree.

I insist, they weren’t the emo MTV darlings yet, Dance, Dance hadn’t come out yet.

Pete was good at networking though. People person.

He had been wanting to start his own label for a while because he thought that he had a good eye for choosing bands. When he introduced one of the guys from Fuelled by Ramen to The Academy Is… in 2004, they realised he could be an asset as a A&R member. This evolved into him founding Decaydence as a FBR imprint.

As I said, he was quite active in his personal Livejournal as both “Pete” and the band’s spokesperson. He interacted with people from the community a lot and he kept us up to date with what he wanted to do (including starting his own imprint).

Ryan, who like many of my friends and I, followed Pete and his band on LJ, thought ‘ohh this could be our opportunity, he’s looking for talent’, and in a blatant move he linked Panic’s Purevolume page in a comment. Probably thinking ‘he might remember me from hanging out at the end of one their gigs so maybe he’ll check the demos out’.

The rest is history.

They were signed in December 2004. The first Decaydence band.

Under the cork tree and A fever you can’t sweat out both came out in 2005.

So yes, no rock star nonsense. That came later.

Although they had signed a major label deal and were about to release their first properly marketed album and that was a huge thing.

Ryan really looked up to Pete scene wise, hence the way things unfolded. He reached out to someone he admired but it wasn’t like reaching out to, let’s say Billie Joe Armstrong, it was more like “oh, FOB were underground, I like their music, they’ve just got signed, Pete knows what it’s all about, he’s starting an imprint, he’s my man” kind of thing. Community building in the internet era ;)

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.
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