Anyway, I bet Kravitz hates Barry and Lup. Not because they’re liches, he’s used to liches. Liches are his job. But they don’t even have the common decency to act like liches. They’re so goddamn domestic and upbeat and ridiculously in love and it makes every single one of his instincts go wild because this- this is not how liches are supposed to act. It’s not right. Can’t you guys go hang out in a cave and make ominous statements and stuff? It would make him a lot more comfortable.
Even their sense of fashion freaks him out. Lup “phoenix isn’t just a metaphor, I literally need to put fire patterns on everything I own” Taaco and Barry “I just have the one pair of jeans and I wash them every day” Bluejeans aren’t following the rules of necromancy. Even their spooky robes are in a primary colour and it horrifies him.
Imagine you were a crime fighting hero, and then one day these two clowns came to town looking like they escaped from young couples group date night, making out and giggling as they expertly rob a bank. They invite you to dinner and set you up with their brother and refuse to ever wear ski masks. On a professional level, the way Barry and Lup have approached undeath upsets Kravitz. You can’t just make necromancy into your own personal happily ever after! That’s not allowed! Stop it, both of you, you’ll give everyone else ideas. And please, can you wear at least a little black?