i liked how different it is from that time

anonymous asked:

What do you think is important when writing love?

I sat on this ask for a long time, because I really liked this question… it’s a tough one to answer. 

I’m sure many people have heard of the four loves, which stem from the four words used in ancient Greek for different types of love, loosely defined as: unconditional love (agape), intimate/mainly sexual love (eros), friendship/love between equals (philia), and instinctual/familial love (storge)

And on top of these many kinds of love, no two people feel love the same way… it is very difficult to define what portraying it entails. So after thinking about this, and how I write and have relationships of any nature progress in my stories, I think my answer would be that the most important thing for me when expressing love between two characters is understanding and making it clear why and what made them fall in love. 

I mean this in any sense; platonic, romantic – sometimes the answer can be simple. E.g., this character is another character’s father, and will always love their child no matter what (agape/storge). But if the story has a deeper relationship or revolves around the love between two characters, I think it’s usually very important for the writer to have an understanding of what makes the characters love each other, and then make this abundantly clear to the audience, both during the budding relationship and after it has been solidified. 

Bear in mind, this doesn’t mean there need to be grand declarations of love or page and pages focusing on these pivotal aspects of their relationship (unless you’re writing a romance, in which case… yeah). But it should still be clear. 

Let’s use KageHina as an example! :D At the start of the series, Kageyama has negative faith in Hinata, and Hinata can’t stand him in return. This goes pretty much up to the wire, right before their practice match against Daichi/TsukiYama. Kageyama is, at best, resigned about working together; until he slowly starts realizing while watching Hinata receive the ball that Hinata is actually managing to do so (badly), whereas before he couldn’t at all. Kageyama recalls how harsh he’s been and contrasts it with how steadily Hinata has been working and how far he’s willing to push himself to make something out of their reluctant teamwork… and Kageyama tosses him the ball. 

He doesn’t at any point actually say “Hold up, maybe this kid isn’t the worst” at any point in time. But in that moment, we see a turning point. And it swings back around the other way when Kageyama tells Hinata he will make him invincible – it’s the moment Hinata realizes he doesn’t just have a teammate in Kageyama, he has a partner, something he’s worked for and wanted for a really long time. 

Speaking of KageHina, or writing for any fandom-based pairing, I do find occasionally that a lot of fics fall into a trap of assuming that, because the OTP is “understood” by readers outside the canon of the fic itself, there is less or even no explanation needed for why two characters want to be in a relationship (often, why two characters are suddenly trying to suck each others’ faces off, or touch genitals). This is fine if it’s a one-night-stand fic, but less so if you want readers to get invested in the emotional core of the relationship, even if they’re already there to read about KageHina or IwaOi or DaiSuga, etc. 

If you think about it this way, the reason fandom loves reading about the same two people falling in love over and over is because we want to know why and what made them fall in love? Romantic or platonic, if that part gets skipped, it makes everything feel a little less satisfying.

So to come full circle, my belief is that love is based on connections. The feeling is motivated by each character’s wants and needs, their hopes and dreams and fears. When they connect with someone enough to love them on any level, in any way, all of those things that are intrinsically them will come into play. The stronger their love, the more important grasping all those aspects of their character will become, because it is very hard to truly love someone who can’t or won’t understand who you are. I think it’s important to keep that in mind any time you want to show why a character loves anyone or anything.

The better I understand the characters I’m writing, the better I’m able to answer the questions why? What made them fall in love? 

Thanks for the question, anon! 

anonymous asked:

Hi, I love your art style! I wanted to ask if you have any tips for traditional artists trying out digital art for the first time please? Like where to get a cheap tablet and how to use a digital art program?

I recommend monoprice tablets to start out because theyre fairly cheap and work really well! (I got mine for 45$ and its a dream lol)

As for programs, I’d look up a butttone of tutorials online when you decide which program you want to use! I use SAI for actual drawing and photoshop for editing, but you may wanna use something different!!! Watching speedpaints are pretty useful too!

And PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE. Going from traditional to digital is kinda weird at first but you’ll get the hang of it soon!!!

Anonymous asked:

I have a problem - I’ve been working on a novel for about three years. It’s gone through some serious revisions and is a stronger story because of it…but my writing style keeps changing! It’s sometimes VERY obvious when you read different sections of the story and I hate that! I’m juggling a lot besides writing, so I can’t set aside some time to rewrite the whole thing. So how can I make my writing more uniform? or make the slight differences intentional and beneficial to the novel as a whole?

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the only way to make the writing uniform from beginning to end is to rewrite it.

Now, “rewrite” doesn’t mean starting from scratch. It just means you start at the beginning and reword things as you go. I like to do a “save as” draft with a new title (one I won’t confuse with the original draft) then, just start reading and change things as you go. Things that no longer fit your style will jump out at you and you’ll have the urge to change them. You’ll know them when you see them. :)

What’s great about a rewrite like this is you don’t have to do it all at once. You can work on it for a little while each day or as often as you can. As long as you get it done within a reasonable amount of time–a few months, say–your writing style isn’t going to change drastically throughout the course of the rewrite. So, once you get to the end, you should have a unified product. :)

Have a writing question? I’d love to hear from you! Prohibited topics: portrayal of diverse characters, emotions, specialist knowledge questions (medical, etc.), “how to portray/describe,” asking for tropes/cliches; broad, vague, or complicated questions. See master list & main site for more info!


“The difference here is that Vivid approached Amber. Farrah had to make her tape and sell it to Vivid.”

Sorry Amber but there’s no difference. The end result is the same. Weren’t you just ranting about how Farrah ‘sold her vagina’ and 'isn’t a real woman’?

Does anyone else feel like this is fake? It’s so ridiculous I’m having a hard time believing it’s real. Is Amber just a massive hypocrite or is she trying to distract everyone from Matts confirmed cheating and dick pic?

anonymous asked:

Hi, do you know how I can read your story from the start on my phone? I can find the beginning on PC but I'd like to read it other places too.

I’d really like for you to be able to read it from other places too nonny, but here’s the thing,I’ve been writing this trash for over a year and the only way I can think of is going all the way to the beginning and putting links on it and I just don’t have that kind of time right now. Maybe someone else knows a different way? Is there a way for me to link it specifically for mobile? Help meeee????? If you want to read my other story, About a boy I’d be willing to go back and make it mobile compatible today, just let me know. And if not hopefully one of the amazing people who follows me knows a more simple way for me. Also I love you for wanting to take the time to read my stuff, it means a lot. 

Ep. 8

First off I can’t believe Toneri’s punk ass is back like sis go sit down somewhere. I love how my son Mitsuki just pops up and inserts himself into conversations like he’s been there the entire time. I’m ngl I really did expect a different reaction from Hiashi bc he was a real hard ass especially to Hinata but of he’s eased up and I’m really happy at the way he treats Boruto and Hima which I’m happy I got to see a little bit more of the little cutie. HANABI’S CHARACTER DESIGN IS SO CUTE AND I AM JUST SO HAPPY TO SEE HER. Also feeling the long hair. It almost seems as if Boruto and Himawari visit them often but not on an everyday basis so that’s great. I wonder why Hinata didn’t go with them too? I am a little irked that Naruto really won’t believe Boru on the byakugan business like I get not every Hyuga can awaken it but we’re talking about the child of some really exceptional ninjas why wouldn’t he have it🙃 anyways I’m excited for the next episode. Really can’t wait to see more of Hanabi bc she never really got any screen time either and I really liked her when she wasn’t being encouraged to beat Hinata’s ass lmao

thosedolantwinboys  asked:

Around the time E got his follow from Niki, I remember seeing this comment that really irks me. The so called "fan" told Ethan to "stay in his race" because she was offended he likes a person of another color. I strongly dislike racist people. It's like, I understand everyone has their own opinion but do they really have to express it through hatred? No one is any different than the another. Like, if I were to pull back my skin right now, you would see the same thing your body contains.



anonymous asked:

To everyone saying why all of us are emotional and concerned about the Manchester attacks, aren't we all humans? We should be there for each other in times like these. It's a dark day for all of us. I'm from a different continent but I don't take that as a reason to not be affected by this horrific news. It could've happened anywhere and to anybody. Just because we aren't the victims doesn't mean we shouldn't sympathize with people. It's never a wrong time to speak about how you feel.

Well said <3

I think probably… A lot of people don’t realize how severe IBS can be. I just got reminded of it today because I went to a doctor to sort out my prescription painkillers and I’m always anxious because a lot of the time I have to argue with them about it but he was just like “the way you’re taking them seems sensible, no problem”.

For a lot of people, IBS is just “my stomach hurts every now and then”. For other people, like me, it involves having pain ranging from 5 to 8 several times a week and often ruins plans, even though I take 5 different medications for it. About 10 times a year it’s so bad that it’s a 9, and my ears ring and I can’t see properly and sweat is dripping and I almost pass out. And, yanno, it’s not just the pain but your stomach gets really upset too so it’s totally unacceptable in a job environment because you can’t just go sit in the bathroom for 30 minutes.

It just… It sucks to be on the more severe side of an illness because diagnosis and care is usually based on “the average” case and a lot of the time, doctors don’t even believe it can get that bad. I’m sure this applies to a lot of other illnesses too

I hate my speculations sometimes. Why? What did I speculate this time?

Remember how Zarc got locked inside of Reira? What if that same thing happened the first time and the product was Reiji? Yes I know it’s out there but look at his aces from his deck. Different Dimension Demon King. Now if Ray’s encounter split the dimensions and Zarc is known as the Supreme Demon King Zarc it’s too coincidental. Not only that but Zarc and Reiji share a certain hair color. Although not Zarc himself since Y uya was proven to be Zarc what if Reiji is like Reira being a by product from the split. This way Reiji can still be Ray’s sister after the split.

That said, here are some Hamilton facts for y’all that are all true to life (picked from Chernow’s biography, which I read far too often) 

  • Hamilton’s ship caught on fire on the way to America 
  • Burr was the lawyer for Maria Reynolds in her divorce from James Reynolds
  • At a ball prior to Hamilton and Eliza’s marriage, of which Angelica, Hamilton, and Peggy were attending together, Angelica dropped a garter and Hamilton, like a chivalrous hoe, swoops in to pick it up and Angelica teased him, “haha you’re not a knight of the garter” and peggy goes “nah but he’d be a knight of the bedroom if he could”
  • I am deadass not making this up. she said that in real life (albeit with different wording) 
  • One time at a debate, Burr was so pissed off at how Hamilton would never shut the fuck up, so he successfully tried to predict all the points he would make and countered them all, making it the only time Hamilton was ever left embarrassed and speechless 

  • maria reynolds was a blonde

  • hamilton was a ginger. dude had BRIGHT red hair and total mary-sue eyes because people described them as “violet-blue.” WHO HAS VIOLET BLUE EYES

  • Hamilton BLASTED Eacker in the press after he killed Philip & roasted the shit out of him. dude was ANGRY 
  • After his duel, when Hamilton was rowed across the Hudson, he was the one and only person to be calm, not panicked & not grief-stricken at the prospect of his death  
  • Burr deadass wrote to the doctor tending Hamilton AS HE WAS DYING and said “yo i hope he’s okay” (again, different wording of course) 
  • Prior to his death, one of Hamilton’s sons lawyered for Burr’s second wife, coincidentally named Eliza Jumel, in her divorce from him 
  • Madison was pretty guilt-ridden after Hamilton died (he spread a lot of rumors about his treasury funds) and he went to visit Eliza & try to compensate her for Hamilton’s nonexistent money, as she was in a financial hole, & she goes “nah fuck off” (WORDING DIFFERENTLY OFC) and told him off for being a dick 
  • Theodosia Burr died overseas a few years after Philip & Hamilton’s deaths
  • When James Monroe came to apologize to Eliza later on in life, after Hamilton’s death, for how shitty he treated him, Eliza - a seventy year old woman at the time - basically said the 18th century version of “fuck you” and roasted his soul out of his body 

  • what im trying to say is that lin portrayed everyone in the musical fuckin amazingly like Got Damn . there was A Lot of irl drama with these eighteenth century ninnies 

hey so i found out that not a bunch of people knew about this handy thing

but you can post anonymously on AO3!!! here’s how it works:

  • post it under this collection
  • everyone sees this work under “Anonymous” but you see your own work as “Anonymous [Your Username]”
  • the fic is STILL connected to your account, but nobody can trace it back to you + you still get comments in your inbox!
  • “is it like “Orphan”? 
  • nope! it’s not! the difference is when you Orphan a work, it’s no longer connected to your account and you can’t get alerts/comments.
  • “can I de-anon my work?”
  • yes you can! you can de-anon your work any time you want. all you have to do is remove your work from the anonymous collection!

if you are shy about posting, or scared of having a work connected back to your account, or even participating in an anon fest, this is PERFECT!

i just.. . can’t get over sign of the times. there is so much feeling in it - hope, desperation, strength, vulnerability, pain, love, bravery - and all of it is so palpable, i feel like i can taste it in the air while the song’s playing. he pulls you in at the very first note and tangles you into his soul with every note after that. the energy in his voice just. it washes over you, wave after wave, like an ocean of electricity and emotion. 

I was feeling weird about my coloring lately cause it seemed to make the original lineart look so different from the final illustration, so I decided to simplify it a lot and this is my first attempt! So far I like it better, the face over all heee. 

This is also the first time I draw Inej so here have her *shoves her towards you*


“I think it’s so cool how we were cast in Spider-Man. That said, it feels very natural. You go to a high school and this is what it looks like. We’re all from different backgrounds, different shades – that’s what the world looks like. I think it’s time the film world started to represent how it really is. I love being part of Spider-Man because it shows the difference between diversity and tokenism.” - Laura Harrier for ASOS Magazine

some trick ass youtube bitch in 2010

japan sure is weird guys isnt it weird how different japan is

isnt it crazy how japan is so weird! oh japan! you so weird! *laugh track*

isnt weird how a culture and societal code of conduct can be different from ours, especially under the circumstances that lead japan to be isolated from the rest of the world for so long, leaving it to progress uniquely to most western civilizations?


one time i saw a japanimation and there was a hot babe and she saw a tentacle and it was a porn of tentacle how fuckin wacky is that

You’re In Love With Him But He Likes Your Best Friend

Masterlist linked in bio 

Harry’s been drinking all night.

It all started off with Savannah, whom he went to Lexi’s Bar with a couple of friends. It was a tradition they all had that carried throughout the past couple of months. Because Friday night meant cheaper alcohol, and Y/n’ s closing shift.

They were all having a good time, Y/n serving them drinks and they all drank their week away. It was just a night of celebrating the end of the week, where stress could be left behind for at least a couple of hours.

Everything was great until Harry got too handsy. It wasn’t his fault, he thinks, they had been talking for months and he had no particular reason to refrain himself from wrapping his arms around Savannah, considering she’s let him do it many times before.

But tonight, she wasn’t going near him, which was a drastic change from her previous attitude with him earlier that night.

So now, he’s stranded at Lexi’s Bar past closing hours, tipsy out of his mind. Savannah left without a word, abandoning him at the bar with no other ride home. 

Jesus, Harry!” Y/n gasps, her hand instinctively reaching for her chest when she makes her way back to the bar. “What the hell are you still doing here?!”

Their friends had left a while ago, only Harry remaining slumped against the bar with an empty glass of Malibu. She wasn’t aware of his stay, in fact, it was her closing shift and the bar had closed twenty minutes ago. Only the slight sound of the radio and the clanging of dishes Y/n was washing could be heard throughout the scene.

He looks like a mix of frustrated and upset, a clear shadow of sadness in his eyes as he looks up at her. He frowns a bit, looking back down at the empty glass that’s fiddling in his hands as he lets out an almost inaudible sigh.

“Do you mind driving me home?” he asks guiltily, “Savannah was my ride but she’s not really speaking to me right now.”

Y/n furrows her eyebrows at the softness of his words, an evident tone of helplessness when he spoke. She nods her head slightly, reaching over to grab his finished drink.

“Gonna wash this real quick,” she mutters, “you can grab your coat, I’ll be right out.”

Harry nods while shooting her a small smile through his frown. He’s always been extremely appreciative of her efforts with him. He knows damn well no other person would be able to treat him the way she does. She put him first, always, and it had always been something Harry never fully understood. She went out of the way for him whenever he needed it most, without the smallest hesitation. And if he needed someone to talk to, even if it was about the horrendous traffic on his way to work, she was always there to listen to him.

He can’t lie, he feels guilty that it’s her closing shift and she’d have to be driving out of her way in order to take him home. But in all honesty, he had nobody else. Savannah left without a word after Harry tried desperately to get her attention, his other friends following shortly after in one car, leaving Harry stranded alone at the bar with Y/n still working. So, really, this was his only option.

When Y/n returns to the front of the bar, she remains silent as she grabs her coat off of the hanger. She looks at him from the corner of her eye, watching as his fingers rub harsh circles against his temples, a gesture he’s always done when he was stressed. He shook his head slightly, shutting his eyes tightly as he fixes the jacket hanging swiftly from his shoulders.

She bites her lip, curious eyes wandering around his slumped frame. Seeing Harry distressed makes her feel upset. Witnessing him at a time of stress was extremely rare, and something about it makes Y/n’s stomach drop. He was always so positive, always making sure the people around him were smiling. He has the type of personality others strive, because he’s so selfless and effortless at everything he does, it’s the part of him Y/n always loved and admired.

“What happened? You okay?”

Harry lets out a frustrated sigh, his nose flaring as he closes his eyes momentarily.

“Savannah’s just so confusing sometimes. I like her a lot, but she’s hard to keep up with. It’s like she’s into me one minute and the next like I’m completely wasting her time, you know? I don’t know what she wants from me anymore.”

Y/n nods, understanding completely what he’s talking about. Savannah often does this to him—to most guys, actually.Because of how different they both are relationship-wise, it’s almost impossible for Harry to adjust to Savannah’s ‘hard to get’ character. Harry prefers to not waste any time when it comes to dating. If he likes someone who reciprocates feelings, he immediately takes action. That’s how he always was with his past girlfriends, taking no time to start a relationship with them.

Savannah, however, loves the game. Being chased amuses her, almost makes her feel as if she’s worth something. Because of her undoubtable beauty and irresistibly charming personality, she always makes the man work for her liking. Her character always made guys frustrated but exposed them to an entirely different relationship. Her hot to cold attitude made men feel intimidated, yet motivated them to catch her. Because, undoubtedly, she’s the ultimate catch no guy could ever ignore.

It had always been that way, too. When Y/n and Savannah both hit puberty, Savannah was the irresistible one. Her figure curved at all the right edges, her tan complexion naturally glowing, and she started to expose herself to new people.

She wasn’t shy of anything. Any opportunity to take on a challenge called Savannah’s name. She was constantly seeking adventure and finding new people to get along with. Which, of course, wasn’t hard at all. Everyone liked Savannah, it was almost impossible not to.

Y/n, however, was the exact opposite. She was beautiful, but not ‘Savannah beautiful.’ She was paler, not a spot of makeup on her face. Her body was a bit more frail than hers, her curves not as extenuated. She was more introverted, as well, only speaking when she felt was necessary. The only way she was able to make friends was through Savannah’s courageous behavior.

And although Savannah and Y/n had an unbreakable bond since middle school, being Savannah’s best friend screwed up Y/n’s love life tremendously. It hurt Y/n a lot throughout her high school years. Being best friends with the most beautiful girl wasn’t easy for her, if anything, it made her feel less about herself. It’s the exact reason why she hasn’t dated in years. Because guys Y/n liked always ended up falling for Savannah.

Which is exactly what’s happening with Harry.

Y/n first met Harry when she began working at Lexi’s. It was her first Friday night shift during the summer. It was her first week after training, so she wasn’t quite used to the busy weekends and late hours, but she didn’t mind it.

She was rearranging glasses at the bar when Harry first walked in. Her breath hitched in her throat when she first saw him enter. She could have sworn her heart had jumped out from her chest in that very moment. He was beautiful, a different kind of beautiful, too. He was so effortless at it—the way he moved and the way he presented himself; he had confidence in himself without flaunting it.

He was wearing tight black jeans with a pink floral see-through button up, flowing loosely from his shoulders. His chest was in great view, as well, the cross hanging from his necklace dangling perfectly between his pecs. His hair was freshly cut, his face freshly shaved and had an aroma of a cologne Y/n wasn’t familiar with. It was unique, though, like him, and all-in-all made him more attractive than she already perceived him to be.

Her eyes went wide when he claimed the barstool in front of her, her actions coming to a halt as her eyes hawked over his every move. She genuinely forgot how to breathe, his physical features overwhelming her in ways she’s never experienced before. The world around her seemed to fade as she admired every part of him she could see.

He was just so breathtaking.

It wasn’t until one of the other bartenders dropped a glass onto the floor that Y/n was pulled out of her trance. She quickly shook her head, slowly coming back in touch with reality. Thankfully, he hadn’t seemed to notice her presence yet.

She shook her head again before working to dry the remaining shot glasses. She just had to make it a couple of hours without completely embarrassing herself in front of him, that’s all she had to do.

Her eyes drifted slightly to him again when he lifted his right leg up against the unoccupied barstool next to him, leaning over before his fingers started working to retie his shoelace.

“The usual.” he spoke, eyes still cast downward.

Y/n looked around behind the counter, checking to see if he was talking to someone else. Considering she had just started working there a week ago and hasn’t served him yet, she was completely clueless as to what he was ordering.


He looked up from his shoes, eyes diverting right into hers as a sense of realization reached his features.

“Oh, I see,” he giggled, “Sorry, love. I wasn’t aware there was a new bartender in town.”

His voice was both raspy and smooth in the most elegant way she’s ever heard. His accent was so incredibly thick she could visually see it by the way his lips moved. And his giggle, with the slight smirk he developed made her heart flutter in her chest.

Y/n nodded, smiling slightly at him.

“Yeah, just started a week ago. Nobody’s ever ordered ‘the usual’ before.” she joked, nervous laughter falling from her lips as she tucked loose pieces of hair behind her ear.

He grinned at her, his cheeks turning a bit peachy. He had to admit, she was gorgeous, and clearly had a great sense of humor. He could tell she was shy, though, by the way she wasn’t confident in her words and the way her cheeks flushed whenever he spoke to her.

“Cute” he muttered ever so slightly, Y/n almost thought she imagined it, “‘The usual,’ at least for me, is a Malibu Bay Breeze. Bit heavier on the cranberry juice, a bit lighter on the pineapple.”

Y/n nodded, muttering a quiet “coming right up” before gathering the ingredients. Harry watched her as she poured it all together, mixing the essential ingredients, admiring her gestures and movements whenever he said something that made her smile.

They talked for hours that night, getting to know each other. Y/n was mesmerized, completely and utterly captivated at how somebody like him could possibly exist. He was everything she’s ever dreamed of—there wasn’t any part of him she didn’t find alluring. This was the only time she’s ever spoken to him, yet she found herself feeling something she’s never felt before.

And the feelings only got stronger with time. Every Friday for four months, Y/n found Harry coming into Lexi’s earlier than he usually did, and every time he’d come she prepared him a Malibu Bay Breeze—heavy on the cranberry, light on the pineapple.

He stayed with her until closing, until the last light went off and the music went down. And after she was off her shift, he took her to the 24-hour movie theater that hardly anybody went to in those early hours of the morning. Instead of watching, however, they spent the entire movie goofing around with popcorn and sharing fond memories of their childhood.

To say Y/n had fallen hard for Harry was an understatement. She was completely and unconditionally in love with him.

The feeling he had given her never subsided—he never failed to give her a feeling of euphoria whenever he spent his Friday nights with her. And the more he opened up to her, and the more she opened up to him, the more it felt right. He felt right, no part of her doubted that for a second. He captured her heart and she knew there was no way in hell she was ever getting it back.

Savannah even began to notice her shift in mood ever since her Friday night shifts began. It was as if she turned into an entirely different person. She seemed more confident in herself, and Savannah started noticing the softest of smiles illuminating on her face every so often.

Y/n was the happiest she had ever been before, she swore she was on cloud nine. Y/n started to believe nothing could have torn her down. Nothing.

But then, it happened.

Savannah showed up to Lexi’s during Y/n’s regular Friday night shift. It was a little past midnight, arriving back from her aunt’s wedding—which Y/n would have attended if she didn’t need the money (and if it wasn’t during her shift Harry was a frequent customer in).

She ran in with a long eggplant purple dress, which had a long slit along the leg. Her hair curled in perfect waves that fell loosely down her shoulders, her makeup illuminating and extenuating her flawless features.

“Y/n!” She squealed, scurrying her way to the bar while nearly tripping over her six-inch heels.

Y/n saw Harry’s eyes widen at the sight of her. Of course she visited her when Harry’s here, and of course, she visited when she looked as beautiful as ever. Y/n knew the second Savannah walked in that it was over, every possibility of her and Harry building up to a relationship has been knocked down to the ground.

Y/n closed her eyes momentarily, because she started to feel every part of her heartbreak, and it was the most painful feeling she’s ever felt. Harry’s only seen Savannah for a couple of seconds and he was already looking at her in a way he never has with Y/n.

She gritted her teeth harshly, because how did she think this wouldn’t happen? This was always how it ended, and even if Harry ever liked Y/n enough to start a relationship with her, she wouldn’t be able to hide him from Savannah forever.

“Guess what!” she yelled once she found her way to the bar, leaning against it so she was as close as possible to Y/n.

“What?” Y/n smiled weakly, unable to rid the aching in her chest.

“The photographer at the wedding asked me to be a model for his pictures! And not only that, but he just started working for Top Shop, said he could talk to some people for me to make this work! Can you believe it?! Savannah Turk, next top model! Gosh, I’m so excited!”

Y/n smiled widely. It was always Savannah’s dream to become a model, and she could definitely pull it off. In all honesty, she was shocked she wasn’t one already.

“That’s great, Savannah!” Y/n gasped, “I can’t believe this! I’m so happy for you!”

They both reached over to hug each other, Savannah jumping up and down as small squeals fall from her lips. Once they let go, Y/n is quick to fix up Savannah’s favorite drink as she claims the barstool next to Harry.

Harry’s heart began to race as she scooted closer to him. She was completely breathtaking. He had never seen someone like her before, every part of her intrigued him. She drew him in, and there was no way in hell there was any chance of going back.

“I’m Harry, by the way.”

Savannah let out a slight “push” as she waved her hand in the air.

“I know, Y/n doesn’t shut up about you.”

Y/n’s eyes widened, but quickly refrained against her shocked expression as she let out a nervous laugh. God, they couldn’t know about her feelings, because she hadn’t told anybody about how she felt about Harry and certainly wanted to avoid talking about it while he’s practically gawking over Savannah.

Harry looked up at Y/n with a playful smirk resting perfectly on his face.

“Well, who else is going to get me through my Friday night shifts?” Y/n laughed.

Harry lifted his drink up to her, eyebrows lifting as he smirked at her, “And who else is going to get me through my loneliness, eh?”


Savannah’s eyebrows lifted, a wide grin on her face as she looked over to Harry. And by God, he surely was a sight to see.

“Oh, so ‘Friday night shift boy’ is lonely? Don’t know why Y/n hasn’t taken advantage of that yet,” Savannah smirked, “I know I would have.”

Y/n nods again, mustering up a sympathetic smile to him. She doesn’t want any part of Savannah’s games to make him feel bad about himself. None of what he’s feeling is his fault, and every atom in her body aches for him to know that.

“I’m sorry, Harry” she whispers, “I know how much that can hurt, you don’t deserve it.”

He gives her a soft smile, but it falls just as quickly as it spreads. His gaze falls to the floor, eyebrows furrowing as he shakes his head softly.

“I just can’t keep doing this with her.”

His soft and Bambi eyes look up at her in sorrow, a frown stretched on his lips at the strain his heart has endured.

“I don’t know what more I can do, Y/n.”

And as selfish as it sounds, the first thought that comes to her mind after the hopeless words leave Harry’s mouth is you can love me back.

Because, God, if he loved her, she wouldn’t keep him waiting. She wouldn’t keep him under the impression that he’s not good enough. No, Harry’s fulfilled every part of her wildest dreams, and she would never let a day go by without making him feel the way he deserves—loved.

Despite her selfish thoughts that she desperately wishes she could say to him, she pushes them all aside. Harry needs her, he needs her to be the friend that will be there for him in the latest hours of the night. He needs her shoulder to lean on, and she can’t deny the chance to help him through this and make him feel better.

She doesn’t respond to him, only slinging her bag around her shoulder and pointing her head toward the exit doors.

“We can talk about this later, yeah? Lets just get you home first.”

The ride to his house was silent, mainly consisting of the soft tune on the radio and Y/n’s hushed voice singing along. With the alcohol still buzzing inside Harry’s head, he didn’t mind the silence they shared. It was comfortable because Harry wasn’t in the mood to discuss his anticlimactic relationship with Savannah. He just needed someone to listen to him, to be there for him, and Y/n was his favorite company.

When they arrive at his house, Y/n is basically carrying Harry to his door.

“Yeah, alright, you—that’s right, you’re good” she huffs, the weight of his body making it a struggle for her to walk.

He isn’t drunk enough for her to completely guide him, but he is stumbling a bit and does find himself tripping over his own two feet a couple of times.  

Y/n giggles, shaking her head as she walks him through his front door. 

“I knew I shouldn’t have made you that many drinks. Thank God you weren’t planning on driving, that would have been a mess.”

Harry doesn’t have much time to respond before she sits him down on his couch. She runs her thumb along his forehead softly, wiping away some of the sweat before smiling at him softly.

"Gonna make you some tea, now.”

Harry shakes his head, his hand reaching to grab her wrist.

“Love, you don’t have to,” Harry shakes his head, “you’ve been making everybody’s drinks all night.”

She shrugs, a small smile tugging on her lips.

“I don’t mind. You’re upset, I want to make sure you feel better, alright? I know that Savannah does this to you and I don’t—“ she pauses, closing her eyes softly, “and I don’t want you to keep thinking that this is your fault.”

His heart swells at her words, his large hands reaching out to grip her small ones.

“Would you mind just—just lying down with me for a bit? I don’t want the tea, just need your company right now.”

Y/n frowns slightly, and she isn’t sad because she doesn’t want to be with him. What makes her sad is the intimacy of holding him would give her no chance to escape her feelings. Whenever she feels the heartbreak sneaking back up on her, she always finds a way to distract herself from the pain. Whether it was rearranging her bedroom, organizing the books on her bookshelf, or focusing on her work, there was always a way to escape the pain.

But it’s when she feels him—whether it’s the touch of his hand, or a rub of the shoulder—when she feels his skin ignite her and when she feels the warmth of is body against her, there was no running away from the harsh reality she’s been living in. There is no escape from the thought that she’s in love with someone she can never have because all she feels when she feels him is broken.

And it’s in these moments she finds herself being most selfish. Because he needs her now, holding him, reassuring him that everything will be okay. He’s going through the same feeling she is, and all she can think about is her stupid self and her broken heart, even when he needs her most.

She lays down on his couch first, which Harry finds particularly inviting. He lays with his head face down against her neck, legs tangled in between hers with his arms wrapped around her back. He loves cuddling with her. She’s just so soft, and she feels cozy, especially after he drinks heaps of alcohol. He hasn’t cuddled with her for a while, either, and holding her against him now already makes his shitty night somewhat tolerable.

“Thank you for being with me, Y/n” he mumbles against her collar bone, the fabric of her t-shirt moving against his lips. “And I’m sorry I made you drive me back.”

She giggles softly, her fingers brushing through his messy bed of curls. She feels him relax into her the more she rakes his hair, and he doesn’t hesitate to keep her motions going.

“It’s okay, didn’t have any other plans. Besides, I kind of miss being alone with you sometimes.”

He hums in response, pressing his cheek further into her neck. His eyes shut, his body relaxing to the sound of her heartbeat, which he feels thumping perfectly against his chest.

“S’good to me” he mumbles, “don’t know what I’d do without you, you know.”

Y/n feels her heart skip at the words he spoke against her, her whole body getting an overwhelming sense of despondency.

“Harry, I—“

“I think I’m gonna keep fighting for her” Harry interjects.

His voice is slurring now, his half-asleep daze making his words all jumbled. But he knows what he’s saying, and Y/n knows, too, and her heart plummets. Her throat suddenly begins to choke on cries she wasn’t aware had come so quickly. It’s just another reminder, just another confirmation that Savannah always gets what she wants, even if Y/n wants it more.

“Yeah, I’m not gonna give up on her yet. If I like her, I gotta fight for it, right? She’d be well worth it, too.”

Y/n tries desperately to blink away her tears, and she’s forever grateful that the light is off in his living room when she fails to do so.

“I—I think you should do what you want, Harry” her voice shakes as she speaks, “I’ll be here for you either way.”

Harry holds her tighter, humming in response again, because he’s already falling asleep and finds no energy in him to answer her.

She wishes with everything in her that she can scream, scream at him for being so fucking stupid and oblivious to her love. And the worst part is that she can’t even blame him. She had an entire four months where she could have confessed her feelings, where she could have told him how in love with him she was.

But would it have changed anything? Would they have just ended up in this shitty situation anyway?

And it isn’t until Harry’s passed out on top of her, his breath spreading along her chest and his fingers rubbing her back in his slumber that Y/n realizes she could spend forever laying here with him, all wrapped up against his body. She could fall asleep like this every night, after a long day of work and empty wine glasses on the coffee table. She could see everything, everything she’s ever envisioned, with him.

And it’s in this moment she realizes that she can’t keep doing this anymore, either.

Her cheeks dampen with her tears, hands shaking in his hair. Never would she think she’d have to let him go, but seeing his face rest so peacefully on her chest, she knows she has to.

“I love you, Harry.” She cries, her fingers gripping onto the roots of his hair.

God, Harry, I love you so much.” she sobs.

If Harry wasn’t such a deep sleeper, she would have never dreamt of saying all of this. But he’s remaining asleep, lips parted as he snores, the alcohol in his veins making him almost immobile against her.

“You deserve to be happy, Harry” she whispers, “I shouldn’t hold you back.”

Her body is shaking, soft cries leaving her lips and endless tears streaming down her face. She doesn’t want to let go, she doesn’t want to stop loving him in the way she does now. Because even though it hurts, she doesn’t want to imagine a day without him.

But she has to. For him.

Her thumbs rub along his cheekbones, her eyes admiring his features one last time.

“And it’s because I love you—“ she pauses, swallowing thickly as her shaking lips press tentatively against his forehead, “that I have to let you go.”

hey heres my car boys/taz theory

i copied and pasted this from a message i sent in the mcelstuck chat except i fixed some typos i am 100% serious this is How It FUcking Is this is my canon

so they like….they keep going, forever and ever, but im like…assuming things Deteriorate after a while, slowly kinda, and like- nick , in beamng, is really the only one of them with Real Power- like as jade mentioned hes the one spawning stuff hes the one with the power of creation in this whole scheme of things. so what im saying is nick like Breaks Down nd thats how and griffin gets dungeon master powers like Shed Energy.  but also nick like? deteriorates and thats how the light of creation comes to be, nick is the light of creation

and like- theyre going down, forever and ever, through countless different universes. i figure, after a few millennia, sitting in a car drifting through an endless expanse of space and time with only Candle In The Wind by Elton John to listen to gets? boring? and they come upon a nascent universe sometime/where/if during this and thats how- thats the taz universe like the original one, like the (spoilers) the ipre one.

and griffin sets this like into motion, gets this going, and as the red robes flee from the hunger the boys are right along with them fleeing from the blob through universe after universe because the hunger and the blob are one and the same and griffin is like- manipulating , kind of helping along this universe and these people to eventually- maybe- defeat the blob/hunger and free him and nick from descending into forever