i like showing off my stuff

5

My rendition of this fic by @destieldrabblesdaily.

You should also definitely click to have better quality.

Bad Things- Jughead Jones

Pairing: Jughead x Reader

Description: Just glimpses in to Jughead and Reader’s relationship. Heavily based off of the song “Bad Things” by Camila Cabello and Machine gun Kelly because I’m a total slut for that bop

Warnings: SIN SIN SIN SIN SO MUCH SIN IM A SINNER, Swearing, implied smut, actual descriptive smut like guys this is kinda intense.

I DID IT OKAY I SINNED FOR Y’ALL

(Disclaimer: If you are uncomfortable with Jughead Jones smut then Do.Not.Read. This is literal actual smut intended for the Riverdale Tv Show version of Jughead Jones portrayed by Cole Sprouse, as all my other fics are. If you are offended or do not like this kind of stuff, then just keep scrolling. This is requested by my followers and I won’t deny it or not do it simply because a few other people don’t like it.)


            ___________________________________________-

“Am I outta my head, am I outta my mind? If you only knew the bad things I like.”


It was the little things about him that always had me craving him. The veins along his wrists, when his jaw was clenched. The little hints of curls that poked out of his gray beanie, almost as if they were begging to see the light of day. The frame of his body was probably my favorite part. I had never been attracted to buff men, particularly guys like my friend Archie Andrews. He was a whole different story though. He was tall and lean, almost comparing to the body of a track runner, but his body was still toned in all of the right places, and he was certainly strong enough to carry me up my stairs to my bedroom. Jughead Jones made me think the most sinful things, and I couldn’t ever stop. I’m just lucky that the feeling is mutual.

“Y/n?Did you just hear a thing I said?” My best friend Veronica looked at me expectantly, her eyebrows raised and looking frustrated with me. Truthfully, I hadn’t heard a thing she said. I was too busy focusing my attention on something more…interesting.

Jughead Jones had started out as a friend. That’s how they all did, right? We had four classes together, and mutual friends, so of course, we grew incredibly close over time.Eventually, it became something more The boy stared back at me, his blue eyes piercing through mine and in to my head, almost reading my thoughts. I saw as he mouthed a simple word “tonight” and I gave him a slight nod, biting my lip in response.

“Sorry V, she’s too focused on her loverboy.” Archie taunted me, passing by us and to his friend, knocking shoulders with him. Jughead blushed slightly, not moving from his position on the lockers, his arms crossed over him. I could fix that.

I strutted over, my hips moving a little more than they usually do. Jughead uncrossed his arms and they immediately went to my waist once I reached him, pulling me in to his body that was still against the lockers. I leaned up, pressing my lips to his quickly before the bell rang. I broke apart from my boyfriend, my hand sliding down his shirt slowly. I pulled away, winking at him before strutting off. I didn’t even have to turn around to know his eyes were on me, watching my every step.



“No matter what you say, no matter what you do, I only wanna do bad things to you.”



Jughead and I had been together for a good six months before we got in to our first fight. He always had his nose shoved in to his laptop, and I got no attention from him anymore, and I was angry. I had waited a while for him to notice, and he never did, so I took matters in to my own hands.

My boyfriend sat at a stool in my kitchen, his hands in his hair and his laptop in front of him, His beanie long forgotten on the counter. If I wasn’t so pissed at him, I might have offered to release some of that tension, but I wasn’t in a giving mood that day. I slammed the laptop shut, my eyes glaring at him. Jughead looked up at me with a confused look.

“Forsythe, do you remember why I invited you over?” I asked him, my eyebrow cocked while I waited to his answer. His mouth opened slightly, trying to string together something and drawing up a blank. I scoffed, shaking my head and walking away.

“Baby, wait-” Jughead hopped off the stool, following me out of the room.

“Jughead, I asked you to come over because I wanted to spend time with you!! Not so I could watch you on your laptop the whole time! I just want some of you to myself!is that too much?”

“You know how important this novel is to me, y/n-”

“ I know that! But I should be more important!” I shouted. I didn’t care if I sounded selfish. I was pissed.

“ Of course you’re more important! What kind of question is that?!” Jughead looked at me like I was ridiculous and I shook my head.

“Really? Because sometimes it feels like you would choose that book over me if it came down to it.” I crossed my arms, my foot tapping against the hardwood floor. Jughead’s face fell, and the anger on his face was replaced with a sad look.

“That is not true, that is not true at all, I would always choose you.” Jughead closed the gap between us, his arms wrapping around my waist. I pushed him away slightly, my hands on his chest.


“Prove it.” I spoke bravely, my tone of voice becoming different.


Everything happened relatively quickly from there.Jughead’s hands went around my back, lifting me so my legs were wrapped around his waist, and his fingers wrapping around the backs of my thighs. His mouth was on mine and I felt my back hit the wall. Jughead’s lips went to my neck, sucking harshly at the skin until purple bruises adorned it. My hands went to his sweater, almost ripping the fabric just to get it off of him.

“ My room,” I panted, my hands tangled in Jughead’s hair while he sucked harshly at the collarbone peeking out of my tank top. He adjusted my body that was wrapped around his before making his way to the stairs, carrying me up them. I felt my back hit my mattress and Jughead was on top of me, his legs on either side of my waist and his hands already under my shirt. His had already been tossed over a chair in my room.

I flipped us over so I was on top,grinding my lower body in to his. Jughead let out a low groan, his head tilting upwards at the contact. My hands made quick work unbuckling his belt, pulling it off of him quickly and unbuttoning his jeans. Jughead looked at me impressed.

“No matter how many times you do that, I’m still pretty shocked at your skillwork.” Jughead’s arms went behind his head, a smirk now on his face.

“Don’t get too comfortable.” I taunted, my hands going behind my back.

I unclasped my bra, tossing it across my room somewhere. Jughead sat up quickly, his mouth already on my chest, littering my body with hickeys. He flipped us over again so he was in control, and pressed open mouth kisses down my stomach to my hips, his fingers curling under my sweatpants and dragging the waistband down and off of me. My breath hitched in my throat when I felt his lips on my thigh, leaving light little kisses up them until his mouth was over the fabric of my underwear. My back arched off the mattress at the feeling, my fingers gripping the sheets until my knuckles turned white. Jughead hooked two of his digits in to the side of my underwear, pulling them slowly down my thighs.

“Jug… Jug please.” I begged, not really in the mood to take things slow. Jughead pulled the fabric down the rest of my legs, and they went flinging in an unknown direction of the bedroom.Jughead’s head dipped down, and I was breathing intensely, my hands going to his hair and tangling in to the strands, gripping tightly.




“We’re both wild, and the nights young, and you’re my drug.”




Parties weren’t Jughead’s thing, but Cheryl was in fact now a part of our gang, and it was only fair to at least make an appearance. So, on Saturday night, I was getting dressed and ready to go to her party. I wore a simple blue dress a gold belt with a bow around my waist, and some black ankle boots. Veronica and Betty laid on my bed, chatting amongst the two of them while I finished my makeup. I was finishing my lipstick when Archie and Jughead walked in to my door, both of them surprisingly having smiles on their faces.

Jughead made his way towards me immediately, pressing a kiss to my temple and standing behind me, his arms wrapping loosely around my shoulders. I looked at him through my vanity mirror, blowing a kiss at him, and he blushed and rolled his eyes.

“Are you almost ready y/n?” Betty sighed exasperatedly. She say up from the bed, smoothing out her romper, and Veronica wrapped her an arm around her waist, leaning her head against her girlfriends shoulder

“Oh, Bets, let the poor girl take her time. It’s always classier to be fashionably late.” Veronica pressed a kiss to the shell of Betty’s ear and her face went red.

                                       —————————————–

We arrived on time to the party and everyone split up, Betty and Veronica dancing, Archie talking to Valerie, and my back to Jughead’s chest as we sunk in to a corner of the room, to have some privacy. His arms were around my waist, holding my tightly to his body while he pressed kisses to my neck, whispering incredibly sinful things about what he would be doing to me right this minute had we not been at Cheryl’s house.

I know that Jughead would have rather been at my house tonight, cuddled in to each other on my couch watching a movie, or just talking and being in each other’s presence, or even trying out some of the things he had been whispering to me. I felt a little sympathetic for him, but I knew just the way to cheer him up.

I turned around, my hands slipping in to his, and I pulled him towards the middle of the room. An upbeat song was playing and everybody was dancing and jumping around. Jughead huffed, not wanting to go, but I knew he wouldn’t resist if I tried hard enough.

I finally got him to the middle of the room, my hands lacing with his, my back pressed against his chest as my hips swayed back and forth to the music. I could feel Jughead was tense, so I gave him a little incentive by pushing my lower body in to his slightly, and I heard his breath shudder a bit before he was moving his body against mine and his lips were on my neck.

“we should go back to your place."Jughead whispered, his lips brushing against my skin. I tilted my neck so he could have easier access, taking his hands in mine and running them down the sides of my body. With the way his body was moving against mine, and all the things he had been sharing with me earlier, it would be an understatement to say I was worked up. I grabbed his hand again, weaving through the crowds and shouting a goodbye to Betty and Veronica before starting the trek to my house. Jughead and I walked hand in hand, slowing down every once in a while to kiss each other.


"When we get home, you’re in for it.”

“Oh, I know.”




“And you keep me in with those hips, while my teeth sink in those lips, while your body’s giving me life, and you suffocate in my kiss.”


Fuck, Forsythe.” I hissed, my nails digging in to his back. My hips moved slowly down on to his length, my fingers moving up his back and in to his hair. His hands were wrapped around my body, his lips biting harshly at my shoulder. When I felt my body adjust to him, I rose my hips before sinking back down on to him again.Jughead captured my lips with his, his teeth biting gently in to my bottom lip. We lazily kissed as I moved up and down slowly, my walls tightening around him slightly. Jughead held me as close to his body as he could, our chests pressed together.

I was on cloud 9 every time I was intimate with Jug. Everything about him was breath taking, and he was so beautiful when he was like this: his lips slightly parted, his curly hair matted down and sticking to his forehead, and his body shining from the warmth of our bodies colliding.

I started to move my hips a little faster, grinding down on to Jughead’s hips. Jughead buried his face in to the crook of my neck, and his arms wrapped around me even tighter, if that was possible. I used whatever energy I had left to move my hips faster, bringing Jughead and I both to the edge. I could feel the warmth in the pit of my stomach, warning me that I was close.

“F-fuck, Forsythe,I-”

“I know, baby.” Jughead began to meet his hips with mine on every thrust, one arm unwrapping from around my body to press the pad of his finger to my clit. I gasped at the sensation, my nails scratching against his back harder.

“Shit, shit, I-I’m-” I cut myself off, not having enough breath to finish my sentence. I felt my stomach tighten and then I was cumming on Jughead’s dick, a quiet moan escaping my lips. I kept thrusting against him, riding out my high while he chases his, soon I was being hit with overstimulation, but I powered through it, bouncing against Jughead as fast as I could.

“Fuck, fuck, shit, I’m gonna-” strings of curse words escaped Jughead’s lips as he flipped us over, pounding in to me as hard as he could. His lips went around on of my nipples, sucking harshly, and his fingers rubbed quickly and forcefully against my clit, drawing out another orgasm from me.

Before I knew it, I was cumming again, this time Jughead following as he came inside me. Jughead’s body collapsed on top of mine, not before pulling out of me slowly. My hands tangled themselves in his hair and his arms went back around my body, his head laying against my chest. I could feel his heart race against my own beating heart, and I looked down at my beautiful boyfriend, as I smiled.He was all mine.





“The way we love, is so unique, and when we touch, I’m shivering.”





I woke up to the light shining from my bedroom window, the rays of sun peeking through my curtains and casting rays of light along the sleeping bodies of Jughead and I. The night before had been our one year anniversary, and he “spent the night”, Which resulted in to this morning, the both of us naked in my bed. Jughead was already awake, his fingers tracing along my arms.Goosebumps ran along my skin at the feeling of his touch, leaning up to give him a kiss.

“Good morning, sunshine.” Jughead mumbled against my lips. I giggled as his fingers went to my sides, tickling me the slightest bit.

“Good morning, handsome.” I smiled down at him, my eyes practically in the shapes of hearts. I loved this boy to death. He was the most perfect thing I had ever found in this world.

“How are you feeling?” He asked me, his fingers stopping so his arms could wrap around my back. He pulled our bodies tighter together.

“I’m great.” I told him, leaning down to press a kiss to the tip of his nose. Jughead’s face scrunched up slightly and I giggle again, my hands cupping his cheeks.

“I love you, so much. So, so, soso much.” I started pressing kisses all over his face and I felt it scrunch up again before catching my lips with his. Jughead wasn’t a super affectionate person in public, so I loved these moments I had with him, hidden away under my covers, where it was just the two of us.





“And no one has to get it, just you and me.”






“I swear to god, you two are the most sickeningly cute couple in..in… In god knows what!” Veronica threw her hands up dramatically before slamming them down on to the table at the booth. She looked at the two of us, who sat across from each other. Jughead and I didn’t break our eye contact, still looking at each other and smiling brightly.

“Come on, V.It’s cute. They’re cute.” Betty defended, sitting across from her girlfriend.

“ I know, but look at them! All they do is stare at each other like its the morning after their first time.“ Veronica scoffed before pausing for a second. Her mouth opened in shock before she whispered loudly.

"You guys fucked!” Jughead and I broke apart at that, looking at Veronica with wide eyes. I was about to shake my head when Jughead interrupted.

“We’ve been fucking, V. Catch up.” Ronnie and Betty’s mouth fell open simultaneously at the confidence in Jughead’s voice.He leaned back in the booth and turned his attention back to me, cheekily winking at me. My cheeks grew hot as I looked back at my best friends, mouths still open in shock.

“You guys, you, you’re-” Ronnie stammered, looking back and forth at each other. Jughead and I started laughing at Ronnie’s reaction, and she sputtered.

“I don’t get your relationship. I seriously don’t.” Ronnie slumped in her seat, her chin resting in the palm of her hand.

“Cheer up, V. It’s y/n and Jughead. Nobody gets it except them.” Jughead and I had already tuned out Betty though, our attention going back to each other. Nobody had to understand our relationship, because it wasn’t theirs. It was ours, And it was perfect.

this is a story about a sorcerer and a knight. well, a knight-in-training. they go by KiT, a nickname for their title, but a perfectly good name for anyone. kit’s a good squire, for the most part, but they have a knack for getting into trouble.

this time the trouble is they just fuckin decked another knight in the middle of the tavern.

“keep your hands off my friend,” kit tells the shocked personification of grossness, now sitting on his ass on the ground. kit’s pretty sure the message was already sent though the ass-kicking, but it doesn’t hurt to be thorough.

the man splutters for a minute before finding his tongue. “you— you— you piece of shit, you’ll pay for this. i have powerful friends.”

“bring it on,” kit retorts. they’re feeling pretty confident right now.

they’re feeling significantly less confident as two other men step up behind the first guy.

“outside,” the first growls.

“we’re zit and wedge, and we’re going to kick your ass,” the second one clarifies. 

zit nods. “but we don’t want to make a mess of you on mal’s floor, since it was just scrubbed and all.”

kit glances at mal, who they rather thought was a friend, to find her nodding appreciatively. “brawlers these days are so polite. out you three go.”

kit wilts. “but… there’s just one of me.”

it’s around this time, when the two other guys are starting to crack their knuckles and look like they’re going to drag kit outside whether they like it or not, that someone else pushes their way through the small crowd that’s forming.

“’scuse me, pardon me. hello. what’s going on here?”

she’s got bright blue hair, of the kind that you get from mucking around with magic too much. everyone immediately reassesses the situation, and watches her warily. a sorcerer can quickly change the way a brawl plays out, if they feel like intervening. kit sincerely hopes she does.

“miss,” zit jumps in before kit can get a word in, “this young… person, here, just brutally attacked my poor friend, and me and wedge think we ought to be able to teach them a lesson in manners.”

the sorcerer studies him for a moment, as if considering his statement, and kit grabs their chance.

“pimple here is completely leaving out the fact that their friend wouldn’t leave my friend alone, after she asked him to go away twice!”

zit bristles, and looks to the sorcerer for her judgment.

she considers for while. “can anyone vouch for this knight’s statement?”

“i was the one getting hit on!” tea shouts from behind kit’s shoulder.

the sorcerer digests the witness’s statement. “hm. i’m inclined to see this as a case of self-defense, through the channel of someone who was not the self being hit on. i would suggest that all the parties involved accept the ruling of “he who gets their ass kicked probably deserves it”, and move on.”

“fat chance,” wedge growls. “the pack sticks together. we have to defend our leader.”

werewolves, kit sighs internally. it just figured.

there’s a dramatic pause, then the sorcerer says cooly, “you try it, and you’ll get your asses kicked too.”

zit and wedge eye her warily. kit eyes all three of them, which is hard with only two eyes.

“i reckon we could take a sorcerer,” wedge hypothesizes— an idea that would be quickly proven false in any laboratory experiment.

but this is a tavern, and the sorcerer has a delayed reaction, only raising her hands when zit charges at her. kit flinches back, sure she’s about to be crushed, but the next moment flames explode in the small space between the sorcerer and zit. there’s a yelp, and mad scrambling back from the sorcerer.

“i have nowhere to be until book club at midnight,” the sorcerer informs them calmly, her hands still out, palms up and ready to summon more flame. kit squints at them. “so i have plenty of time to teach you a lesson.”

apparently rescinding their hypothesis, all three werewolves make a mad dash for the door and disappear into the night.

the sorcerer smiles victoriously, and shakes her bright hair out of her face. kit squints at her scalp as she turns to them. “all good?”

“yes, thank you,” tea says, sounding impressed. “wow… a fire summoner. i didn’t know there were any teenagers powerful enough.”

kit has no other specific places to squint, so they just stare hard at the sorcerer’s face. “yeah… thanks. that was really cool.”

she waves their thanks off with one hand, a few strands of smoke issuing from her sleeves. “all in a day’s work. i’ll be off now.”

kit leaves tea with mal, though they frankly no longer trust her so much, and follows the sorcerer out the door. “hey, wait! you, blue hair magic person. what are you?”

“a masked vigilante,” she says, after a pause. “without the mask, because magic.”

kit blinks at that, before realizing she’s perfectly right. besides the definite ideas that she’s female and blue-haired, kit seems to forget what she looks like one moment to the next. kinda neat, honestly, though disconcerting.

they shake their head. “no, i mean… you’re not a sorcerer. i’ve seen people summon fire, and it comes from a loosely closed fist, not an open hand. also, your hair is dyed, not magically changed.”

she doesn’t answer for a moment, then looks stumped, and continues to not answer.

“well?” kit asks.

“fine,” she admits. “i’m a sorcerer in training, but the fake mask is about the most complicated magic i can do. the hair is so people will take me seriously when i do masked vigilante stuff.”

“and the fire?” kit persists.

after a moment, she shakes out her sleeve, sending a tiny purple dragon tumbling into her other hand. “my helper. my fire aid, if you will. you’re the first person to notice, you know?”

“just logic and being awesome,” kit says with a shrug, feeling pleased. neither are skills they get to show off a lot. they kinda feel like they’ve earned something for it. “hey, can i ask you a question?”

after a pause, the sorcerer in training says, “go for it.”

“why do you wait a second before responding to anything?”

their question is punctuated by a pause before she answers.

then the sorcerer motions kit closer, and tucks her hair behind her ears. the knight-in-training leans in, gaping. there’s a green dragon no longer than the length of one finger perched behind her ear, claws holding onto her piercings for balance. it unwedges one tiny wing to wave at them.

“what the fuck,” kit says, unable to find a reason for this from logic or being awesome.

“what the fuck,” the dragon repeats, pushing its snoot practically inside the sorcerer’s ear.

“this is peep,” she says. “my hearing is shit, so it helps me out. i call it my hearing aid.”

the draconian hearing aid preens under the knight-in-training’s stare.

“shit,” kit mumbles, for lack of better words.

“shit!” the dragon crows, gleefully.

but i keep putting happy off. i promise myself once i’m done with school. once i’ve got a job i love. once i find the person i spend my life with. once i get a dog. not now. even the small stuff. the special soap i used is for only special occasions. i’m saving my favorite food for a better moment. i can’t listen to that now, i have to focus. i can’t care about that now, i have to wait for it. i can’t read that book or try that makeup tutorial or get involved in that show. i put it off. like happy is this moving goal post and i’m just always running.

4

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types as people i’ve met irl (infp pov)

ESFP

- in a constant loop between “you know what FUCK SOCIETY I WILL LIVE MY LIFE HOWEVER I WANT AND DO WHATEVER I WANT” and “i still lowkey want to please people around me and not cause too much conflict tho”

- that thing when an ESFP starts describing a situation and they play out all people in it and they do it SO GOOD and it’s SO FUNNY do they all do that

- at the centre of attention is where they will be

- somehow doesn’t exactly belong to any group but is considered a part of every group

- me: oh yesterday I’ve met /that person you have no chances of knowing/

ESFP: ooooOOOH I KNOW THEM

me: how

- is never home but somehow manages to sleep?????

ENFP

- BEST LITERARY TASTES. If ENFP tells you to read that book you go read that book I’m telling you

- “and they told me to do it but you know it’s stupid so i’m not gonna do it”

- can be super annoyed by people they love, but remains loyal to their group

- angry with all their body, vivid gestures included. generally they are moving all the time.

- somehow pretty charismatic and it looks like they feel easy in a leader position

- life isn’t a competition EXCEPT FOR WHEN IT IS

ESTP

- i know only one and they are the class president somehow??????

- “WHEN I SEE MY MOTHER CRY I’M READY TO KILL SOME FUCKERS RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW”

ENTP

- awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

- puns

- i mean puns, ready to write to you at 3 AM just to proudly write a pun they’ve just come up with

- oh no you are sad??? it’s okay they will bake cookies or smh

- the more personal conversation gets the more “lmao” there is

- you can say when they feel happy to be around you and it’s just so adorable

- they are so smart & try to act like they aren’t & everyone can see they are smart anyway so you failed, entp

- entp: i’m going to try doing that new thing and it will be awesome and i will love it!

entp, later: it sucks

entp, even more later: NO YOU KNOW IT WAS COOL ALL ALONG

- *drinks awful juice for the first time* *eats awful meal for the first time* “ohhh it’s… pretty good!”

- really happy to be a part of some group but won’t say it out loud

- “and it was THEN when my Fe destroyed me!!”

INFP

- looks pretty egocentric & has the lowest self-esteem around

- “if I don’t like it I won’t do it, it’s just that easy”

- they are all attention whores (me too, infps)

- w r i t i n g

ISTP

- SO LOYAL LIKE IF AN ISTP LIKES YOU THERE’S LIKE 0.000001% CHANCE THAT THEY WILL EVER LET YOU GO

- after reading this will probably try explaining to me why the math comparison was wrong and didn’t fit

- have such a hard time expressing their feelings

- if they like you and they can talk to you about their day they are so happy? just talk about what they were doing, really.

- “i feel bad? well i guess i will just bottle it up forever”

- can be rly rly quiet & needs a lot of alone time

- there’s objective logic everywhere just let me find it logic is my bitch

- they will be frustrated if you don’t make sense to them but they will try to understand - if not because they like you then at least for science reasons because “what is that wild creature and why do they act like that, i must observe”

- “sarcasm is the only way I speak”

INTP

- I LOVE

- when I start talking to an INTP the 7 hours long conversation is almost guaranteed

- they seem so genuinely interested in what you have to say and ask questions and stuff & what they say makes you genuinely interested as well because they have such an interesting knowledge on subjects you’ve never thought about

- “on the other side tho”

- puns

- on most subjects it’s really easy to convince them because they are always open to see the other side’s point of view

- usually remembers all you’ve told them but always asks if they remember correctly

- intp: OKAY I MADE UP MY MIND

intp, a day later: ON THE OTHER SIDE,

- “look at that dog!”

- mood swings

- so adorable just let me hug them all

INFJ

- takes care of your shit since you’ve met them

- “NO YOU KNOW WHAT. I’M NOT DOING THIS SHIT FOR THEM THIS TIME. THEY WILL HAVE TO MANAGE IT ON THEIR OWN. I’M DONE HELPING THEM. *does this shit for them because of course they won’t manage it on their own so someone has to*”

- saves the world since they were born

- will try to help, joke about how they failed to help, beat themselves internally over how they failed to help

- OKAY TIME FOR ANOTHER SELF-DEPRACATING JOKE

- you: *starts feeling bad*

INFJ, a second later, out of nowhere: hey are you okay?

- MAKES PLANS. SO MANY PLANS. HOW CAN YOU MANAGE ALL THESE PLANS.

- “i’ve been planning on reading/watching it one day since 2004 but I haven’t found any time since then”

- “my Fe can tolerate your stupidity but my Ni-Ti is so done”

- always done with humanity

- *snarky commentary*

ISTJ

- “so usually when I wake up I have a strict plan of how this day is going to look like and it’s extremely pissing off when something doesn’t go according to that plan”

- ISTJ: *is doing homework for ten hours*

me: do you maybe want to—

ISTJ: NO I WON’T COPY OFF YOUR HOMEWORK I’M NOT WEAK

- somehow really wants to show you that you are important to them, even if they are awkward with feelings

- that smile they have when they talk about people they love doing stuff

- also that excited voice they have while doing so

- “I JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND. HOW CAN YOU JUST… NOT BE PREPARED.”

- their anger is so cold and so visible

- some values are not to be touched!

INTJ

- really really REALLY cares about people they like

- is really sensitive for their loved ones’ pain and really awkward when trying to comfort them but boy do they try

- that person that will come back for you after the group wanders off and you are left behind

- INTJ, about really hard situations they’ve been through: “this wasn’t such a big deal tho, I mean eh, it’s over now”

- “HOW CAN PEOPLE BE SO STUPID I JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND”

- ignorance pisses them off even more than it pisses off other human beings

- it’s Monday and my INTJ dad calls me when I’m at school.

me: yeah?

INTJ: hey, I have something important to tell you.

me: sure, what?

INTJ: could you pick up [your sister] from school-

me: sure

INTJ: –on Friday?

- “you know I just… don’t like it when something doesn’t go according to my plan”

- will plan everything for the trip before you try helping

⇁ through the flames (and into the lava)

Originally posted by kookielife

pairing⇁Jungkook x Reader

genre⇁smut, fluff, slight humor, crack || dragon!jk, fantasy!au i guess

warnings⇁public indecency, dry humping, fingering, non-penetrative sex, cumplay, i’m sorry

word count⇁7.8k

Your boyfriend is a dragon.

Or so he claims.

or; the perks (and unexpected complications) of dating a fucking dragon

Keep reading

sooo. this came out while listening to Wild World - thank you darling @ivegotfirefouraheart for recommending it to me !! 💖💛


A Sugar Baby’s Guide to a Luxury Wardrobe and Brands

FOLLOW ME ON MY SB INSTA ~ I have like no followers because I just started the account & would love to connect with more sugar sisters on another platform! I will be posting shopping hauls and inspiration photos. There will also be restaurant, bar and club recommendations and travel pics! SISTERS ONLY!!! @citysugarbabe


Disclaimer: This is my own opinion, and you are free to disagree! I am not being sponsored or gifted items by any of these brands (I wish!). I am simply just trying to share some of my style tips based off of my own wardrobe :) xo

Will continue to update as I think of more things! This was just off the top of my head. Feel free to send in suggestions, if I use it I will give you credit when I edit the post! Questions also welcome. 

Although I am relatively new to the sugar bowl, dressing stylishly and well is something I have done all of my life. I hope my advice can help others! A top, big fish SD is going to dress well, and he’s going to want his SB to do the same. You must exude confidence and style for him to want to pursue you. 

If you are a sugar baby looking to build an ultimate, timeless luxury wardrobe look no further - check out my guide below!

Basics:
T-shirts & Tank Tops - ATM (wonderfully flattering, especially for bigger busts), T by Alexander Wang, Helmut Lang, James Perse
Jeans - rag&bone/JEAN, J Brand, Citizens of Humanity, 7 for all Mankind, J Brand, Current/Elliott, AG Adriano Goldschmidt. Yes I love my denim :)
Anything with a blatant logo on it like True Religion is a NONO.
Shirts - Equipment
Sweatpants - I used to absolutely detest sweatpants but after seeing photos of Rihanna and Gigi rock them, I’m kind of into it. Have my eye on a pair from Fenty X Puma now!

Lingerie:
Agent Provocateur (DUH) has the most sexy pieces, they make you feel wonderful about yourself, however I would only wear their stuff to show off for my man. Their bras, corsets, bustiers etc. don’t give much support so if you’re just wearing them trying to run errands your boob may pop out of its cup lol! Very annoying to constantly keep having to tuck it back in under your shirt.

I have quite a large bust, so I shop at Journelle, Stella McCartney, Elle Macpherson, Nancymeyer.com and Chantelle because a lot of other nice brands don’t make my size as much (32DD/E) - these are for sexier but still functional pieces.

Calvin Klein and Victoria’s Secret for the most functional underwear.
Hanky Panky has great one size fits most thongs, and Commando for underwear for a tight dress or something that gives NO VPL (visible panty lines!)

Shoes:
Sneakers (for fashion, not the gym) - Golden Goose, Common Projects
Sneakers (for the gym) - Nike
Gianvito Rossi - The new Manolo in my opinion. Not as overdone and not flashy like Louboutins. Wonderfully classic. Something I’d wear to a dream job interview or meeting a boyfriend’s parents.
Louboutins - even though they’re a bit trashy now I still love the sex appeal of a red bottom.. who can resist?
Rochas does beautifully embellished flats that you can wear with a cocktail dress if you aren’t feeling heels!
K. Jacques for flat sandals. Made in St. Tropez but they sell it on Shopbop etc.
Chanel and Lanvin for ballet flats
Love Stuart Weitzman’s highland and lowland boots, even though it seems like everyone and their mother owns a pair. They’re just so flattering and I love that they have them in so many neutral colors.
I like Saint Laurent’s basic flat Chelsea ankle boots. Go with everything in the fall.

Dresses:
Dolce & Gabbana - I LOVE Dolce & Gabbana!! As I said I am quite curvy, and their dresses are absolutely made for my body type.
Cushnie et Ochs - Also sexy AF
Giambattista Valli - When you want to look like an elegant, high fashion flower child
Saint Laurent - SO expensive, more for the extremely thin Kate Moss types, but I just like to look anyways :)
Less expensive but still great: Zimmermann (love Aussie clothing brands), Wheels&Dollbaby, Nicholas, L’Agent, Reformation, For Love & Lemons, Maje

Sweaters:
Ralph Lauren, Loro Piana, Brunello Cucinelli
J Crew, Joie, Vince and Everlane (cheaper)

Coats/Jackets:
Maxmara for the elegant, most classic pieces EDIT 10/9/2016: Maxmara carries very well-cut and stylishly professional coats. Think Olivia Pope-esque. This is also where Kim K got her iconic camel wrap coat and yes, they still carry it. I have one!
AllSaints for a great rocker chic leather biker jacket - try a mens one to increase the cool factor
Rick Owens - Also great for leather jackets, but more elegant and definitely more expensive 
Chanel: Their tweed jackets and coats are ultimate and so timeless- wear one with a simple white t shirt, jeans and booties to achieve that Parisian je ne sais quoi.
Yves Salomon does a great fur coat, EDIT 10/9/2016: that isn’t AS expensive as other top fur designers… think $5000-$10,000 which is still mega expensive but still far cheaper than J Mendel whose furs can fetch up to 60k (or even more)! and the quality is still great. I used to get Elizabeth and James furs for like a $1000 but tbh they looked cheap. I think if you can’t afford good fur, it’s best to spend on other areas, because cheap fur just makes you look, well, cheap!

Bags:
Chanel. Duh.
Never used to like Gucci but their new horsebit Dionysus bags (in plain suede without the Gucci logo) are to die for
Valentino Rockstud (a little bit passé but I still like mine)
Mansur Gavriel for something timeless and not too flashy
Saint Laurent for a tote bag. If you’re young, in my opinion this is a much better alternative than an Hermes Birkin or Kelly. I think for a young girl to be carrying a Birkin is a little bit… much. Although if you have found an SD who will buy you a Birkin then I say the more power to you, you’re clearly doing much better than me and feel free to ignore my advice - if fact can I have your advice?? lol

EDIT OCT. 9, 2016:

Where do I shop?
Great question - so. many. places.

Online (just google the names, I’m too lazy to hyperlink haha. Maybe another day):

Net-a-porter: love, and they do same-day courier delivery in NYC, London and Hong Kong
Moda Operandi: swoon-worthy site. You can pre-order next season’s clothes custom made for you straight off the runway, and they show up at your door just in time for the season! You put a 50% deposit down when you place the order at first, and pay the rest a few months later when the clothing piece is completed. I trick myself into believing that it’s budgeting, lol.
Farfetch
Shopbop
Revolve Clothing
TheRealReal (You can get some GREAT designer pre-owned and vintage on the cheap here, AND sell your old designer stuff you don’t want anymore! Note they only accept from a preselected list of designers, check that your item’s brand is on the list before sending anything in to sell)
Vestiaire Collective (same as theRealReal)
Forward by Elyse Walker
SSENSE
TheOutNet (Net-a-porter’s sale site. I’ve found some fantastic deals here. But be sure to check everyday because they definitely sell out fast)
Barneys, Saks, Selfridges, Bergdorfs etc. - I know these are department stores, but their websites are surprisingly well-maintained and carry a really good stock of stuff from top designers.

Cop on a power trip gets grilled by a judge....and tries to shit talk me, then gets probably fired/moved away.

Okay so background: my house is literally connected to my elementary school’s perimeter. I occasionally used to go there at the ripe age of 15 to rip around with my RC nitro cars on weekends. No cars, actually the parking gates were closed but not the human entrances.

Rinse and repeat for 2 years with no problems. I even had patrolling RCMP officers come over and try out my kewl toys. In return, they would oull out a HUGE drone from their car and fly it around me to show me what drones are like and what speeds they can go at.

This went well till 2015. 2016 June comes and I am still doing that stuff while suddenly I hear police sirens. Out comes a cop, gives me a HUGE lecture about how I’m on federal property and I need to IMMEDIATELY get off because I do not have permission. This hot shot acted like I was stealing shit or something, he even looked through my bag without permission and found a pack of “dangerous liquid packs” which turned out to be rubbing alcohol for my hands.

Anyways, he issues me a $187 ticket for unlawfully operating a remote controlled blah blah (I forgot).

I was thinking, f*ck this. I’ll fight it in court. I did my research and the ticket he gave me was actually for people who rip around in their oil powered RC planes in private spaces without permission. This was obviously some bullshit. I even got the recording of his car dealing with me.

A few months later, I go to the court to contest it (that’s the set date). A**hole cop is there, and he tells me that before I go to the court, he can make my fine half if I plead guilty. I say no and I am pretty sure he said “f*cking b*tch” under his breath.

We go inside the court room, a**hole is all loud and proud when giving his statement. He straight up LIES, saying I was being belligerent and I almost ran away in fear.

Well, cameras don’t lie a**hole! When it was my turn to give my statement, I played back his cruiser dashcam, which CLEARLY showed him being a dick, pointing his hands away as if he’s going to fight a 17 year old puny 5 foot 8 guy.

The judge f*cking grilled him. She constantly said this was an abuse of power, a waste of resources, and that recommended the officer to read up on what public and federal restricted property was. The whole ordeal was embarrassing for him and I kind of felt bad because people were giving him dagger eyes the whole time.

Anyways, ticket is thrown out and I head out the room. I see the cop on the parking lot, and right as I pass by, he says exactly “f*cking brown motherf*cker, get f*cked”. I was f*cking shocked by this, so I went home and filed a complaint at his Depot.

No response for 7 days, then 15. So I call them back about it.

“Yes, he is not working at this branch anymore, we can still assist you with anything pertaining to this report sir.”

“No it’s alright, thanks”.

That was it. A**hole either got fired, or got moved away.

Angsty Bojack Horseman Sentence Starters
  • “The most important thing is, you got to give the people what they want, even if it kills you.”
  • “You know, sometimes I feel like I was born with a leak, and any goodness I started with just slowly spilled out of me.”

  • “Life is a series of closing doors, isn’t it?”

  • “Am I a good person?”

  • “That’s the problem with life, either you know what you want and you don’t get what you want, or you get what you want and then you don’t know what you want.“ 

  • “There’s nothing for you behind you. All that exists is what’s ahead." 

  • "Family is a sinkhole, and you were right to get out when you had the chance." 

  • “I don’t understand how people… live. It’s amazing to me that people wake up every morning and say: ‘Yeah, another day, let’s do it.’ How do people do it? I don’t know how.” 

  • “You didn’t know me and then you fell in love with me. And now you know me.” 

  • “Closure is a made up thing by Steven Spielberg to sell movie tickets”.

  • “We’re just two lonely people trying to hate ourselves a little less.” 

  • “I don’t think I believe in ‘deep down’. I think that all you are is just the things that you do.”

  • “You were born broken, that’s your birthright.”

  • “You know what your problem is? You want to think of yourself as the good guy.”

  • “you’re a selfish goddamn coward who just takes whatever he wants and doesn’t give a shit about who he hurts. That’s you.”

  • “You know, it’s funny… when you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags.”

  • “I’m sorry, alright? I screwed up, I- I know I screwed up.”

  • “You can’t keep doing shitty things and then feel bad about yourself like that makes it okay! You need to be better!”

  • “You are all the things that are wrong with you.”

  • “Fuck, man. What else is there to say?”

  • “We’re not doomed. In the great, grand scheme of things, we’re just tiny specks that will one day be forgotten.”

  • “The only thing that matters is right now, this moment, this one spectacular moment we are sharing together.”

  • “I don’t understand how people… live. It’s amazing to me that people wake up every morning and say: ‘Yeah, another day, let’s do it.’ How do people do it? I don’t know how.”

  • “He’s so stupid he doesn’t realize how miserable he should be. I envy that.”

  • “It’s not about being happy, that is the thing. I’m just trying to get through each day.”

  • “I can’t keep asking myself ‘Am I happy?’ It just makes me more miserable.”

  • “It takes a long time to realize how truly miserable you are and even longer to see it doesn’t have to be that way.”

  • “When you do bad things, you have something you can point to when people eventually leave you. It’s not you, you tell yourself. It’s that bad thing you did.”

  • “It’s so cruel to let people love you. All you’re doing is promising you’ll one day break their hearts.”

  • “One day, you’re gonna look around and you’re going to realize that everybody loves you, but nobody likes you. And that is the loneliest feeling in the world.”

  • “There are some people you can’t save. Cause those people will thrash and struggle, and try to take you down with them.”
  • “ Hey, I wanted to talk to you about… you know. I feel bad about what happened.”
  • “I don’t forgive you.”
  • “No. I’m not gonna give you closure. You don’t get that. You have to live with the shitty thing you did for the rest of your life. You have to know that it’s never, ever going to be okay!”
  • “You have to believe me. I did everything I could.”
  • “I had a good life, but what I needed then was a friend! And you abandoned me. And I will never forgive you for that.”
  • “Now get the fuck out of my house!”
  • “ Look, I’m sorry about all the stuff I said about you earlier.”
  • “Do you… do you think it’s too late for me? I mean, am, am, am I just doomed to be the person that I am? “
  • “I, I, I need you to tell me that I’m a good person.”
  • “I just wanted to tell you that I know. I know you want to be happy, but you won’t be… and I’m sorry.”
  • “ What more do you want? What else could the universe possibly owe you? “
  • “I want to feel good about myself. The way you do. And I don’t know how. I don’t know if I can.”
  • “If you ever try to contact me or my family again, I will fucking kill you.”
  • “ You can’t just disappear. You really hurt a lot of people.”
  • “In this terrifying world, all we have are the connections that we make.”
  • “It’s so sad that when you see someone as they really are, it ruins them.”
  • “You like being there to rescue me. Because it makes you feel good about yourself.”
  • “ You know that I don’t do the whole love thing. Either you end up hurting someone or they hurt you. So what’s the point?”
  • “ Uh…. Oh, god, I’m drowning. I feel like I’m drowning.”
  • “Hey, we have all done shitty stuff before. Most of us aren’t as proud of it as you seem to be.”
  • “It doesn’t get better and it doesn’t get easier.”
  • “I can’t keep lying to myself thinking I’m gonna change, I’m poison.”
  • “I come from poison and I have poison inside me and I destroy everything I touch. That’s my legacy.”
  • “I have nothing to show for the life I have lived. And I have nobody in my life who’s better off for having known me.”
  • “You’re gonna wanna kill yourself, and there’s going to be no one left to stop you.” 
Rude customer always pays in handfuls of change. Not anymore!

I work overnights in a gas station in a particularly bad part of town. So from 11pm-6am I use a pass through drawer to make transactions so I don’t get shot or robbed. This one asshole shows up a couple times a week and gets at least 20 dollars in gas, and maybe 10-15 bucks in other stuff.

How does he pay? By just dumping a handful of change into the drawer, making me pick it all up. Even if I have my hand out, he’ll go under my hand and throw it in the drawer.

That pissed me off like you wouldn’t believe, so I started being rude back to him. I don’t give him his stuff until I pick up each coin piece by piece and then count it all out and put it in the drawer. I’m talking like $30 in quarters and dimes and nickels so it takes a good five minutes.

One time I was doing it, he says “Come the fuck on man, I’m in a hurry!” I just said “Yeah?” and kept going while he huffed and puffed and swore and paced back and forth.

After 5 or 6 times of this, he started paying only in bills. I win :)

5

July’s Featured Game: SLARPG

DEVELOPER(S): Bobby “ponett” Schroeder
ENGINE: RPGMaker VX Ace 
GENRE: RPG, Fantasy
SUMMARY: SLARPG is a short, turn-based RPG following the story of Melody Amaranth, a kindhearted but meek transgender fox who’s decided to learn healing magic and become a paladin. She’s joined by her adventurous girlfriend Allison, as well as their friends Claire (a sarcastic, rule-bending witch)(she is also trans) and Jodie (a dependable, somewhat motherly knight). Over the course of the story, our inexperienced heroes will meddle with forces beyond their control and find themselves responsible for the fate of their quaint little hometown. They’ll also fight some spherical frogs, travel to a forgotten land in the sky, befriend a robot or two, and anger the local librarian. But that should go without saying. 

Our Interview With The Dev Team Below The Cut!

Keep reading

@yaxawa masterpost

tumblr user @yaxawa has already been called out multiple times but since theres no comprehensive 1 off post with major receipts im posting this

nina yaxawa is 18 years old and reblogs lolicon art frequently and unapologetically. i am not saying she is a pedophile but thats extremely Not Ok to do regardless 

@ninacallout @ninaphobe

warnings for lolicon art, mild nsfw, sexualized underaged characters

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So I’m sure lots of you have heard of or seen AmazingPhil did a slime video. That’s right! ‘Cause who cares if it’s a stupid trend that some people do, if you just like something and you want to do it, just do it. Phil plus crafts as we all know from baking and other craft channels and stuff, is obviously going to go really well. So I was very excited for that. Personally. … So I watched it and it was very interesting and funny actually. What Phil didn’t tell me was that he made the slime, filled it with glitter, got it all over his bedsheets and crap, put it in the wash and then the washing machine… like all the glitter just fell off the stuff he washed and collected at the bottom of it. So then I put all of my clothes that I actually had to wash into the machine, washed them, took them out. Literally everything I’d ever worn was just covered in glitter. And not just like nice glitter, it was like weird slime residue glitter. So that went in twice there… #environment.
— 

@danielhowell during his live show on the 5th of September 2017 (x)

Quotes from Dan (77/?)

The wonders of living with an occasionally craft influenced human that he clearly adores anyway. 

Random Sonic Thoughts # 1

I’m pretty sure I’ve talked about this before but I just really need to vent.


Something that has bothered me in the game canon, is the fact that Sonic and Amy’s relationship is so underdeveloped. Like, it never goes anywhere. And I’m not just talking about on a romantic level, I’m also talking on a platonic one as well. The closest was Unleashed, which seemed to last no more than two cutscenes. I just want to see more than the tired chase between the two. It was funny in the beginning but now it’s just tiring. She’s one of his oldest friends and it should show. Instead we get stuff like this:

Ugh. This just makes Amy look desperate and Sonic come off like a jerk. But I will give credit when credit is due. In more recent games like Lost World and Lego Dimensions (non-canon but it’s still something), they can have normal conversations without Amy getting obsessive and Sonic doesn’t get nearly as irritated as he did in past games. I think the rebooted Archie comics are a good example of how I’d want their relationship to be portrayed :

This, in my opinion, is a good way to portray their relationship. It doesn’t come off as a cheap gag for the sake of comedy and both characters can still be in character. I believe in the hands of the right writer, their relationship can be portrayed in a good way. All in all, I just think it would be nice if the games showed off their friendship at least, it’s long overdue in my opinion.



I plan on doing more rants like this in the future because I just can’t hold things in lol. Anyways, thanks for reading.

6

“You fucked the dairy goat?”

BTS React to you (an idol) sitting in their lap during show

@kissesfrombangtanatnight :  Hi! I’m back! I know you possibly have plenty more requests before me, so of course I’ll be patient. I was wondering if you could do a BTS reaction to you being in a popular girl group and you’re at an award show and during your solo in the love song, you sit on his lap and sing to him because you’ve always had a crush on him, but no one knew. :)

I AM SO SORRY THIS HAS TAKEN SO LONG TO POST. MY LIFE HAS BEEN CRAZY LATELY AND WORK HAS BEEN LITERALLY SUCKING MY SOUL OUT OF MY BODY LITTLE BY LITTLE. 

Thank you for being patient, again I’m sorry it’s so late. T_T


Jungkook:

“Woah, what in the world?” “Oh my god what is going on right now?”

He would be so shocked/shy/embarrassed (he’s feeling all of the emotions tbh). He’s not used to someone coming on so strong, and isn’t sure how to react. 

He would be in a daze the rest of the show, constantly asking his hyungs “Did that just happen?”

“She really did that? During her love song?”

“…… hyung, what do you think it means?”

Originally posted by sugutie

Namjoon:

He would find it really attractive. You taking charge and being so ‘in your face’ about it would make a strong impression on him. Even if he hadn’t noticed you before that moment, he definitely notices you now. 

It would make him so giddy and happy. The rest of the show he wouldn’t be able to stop grinning like a fool. 

He would constantly bug the other members about it. 

“She’s pretty. How is she so pretty?”

“Maybe I should make a move? She’s clearly interested.”

“Yah, what company is she from? Are they allowed to date?”

Originally posted by joonjuly

J Hope:

He would be so shook, he would think someone was playing a joke on him. Why else would such a popular girl idol just come up and lay all over his lap? 

“Am I being pranked right now? Is this for real?”

Originally posted by jjeonguk

Taehyung:

When you plop down in his lap he would not have a clue what to do. He would just give you those pretty brown puppy eyes and look at you in nervous awe. 

Tae is usually all for music show hi jinks, and likes anything that shakes up the status quo a little bit. He would play along, but underneath it would get to him., you would make his heart flutter. 

He would ask around about you, and the stunt you pulled after the show. 

“Is that part of the routine? Does she do that every performance?”

“No? Then why would she do it to me?”

He would have such crush on you afterward. 

Originally posted by cmtae

Jimin:

This boy would love it so much, honest to god. 

Imagine this: Jiminie’s had a little too much to drink while watching the sets, and he’s flushed and happy, and a little bit horny. 

He would play it up and give you his best sexy smirk, before leaning in and beginning to ask “Is my lap comfortable? You know what else is just as comfortable? My face.”

Originally posted by amsimaria

Jin:

You expect him to exaggerate and do something funny in return, because Jin is the KING of drama and comedy. 

He doesn’t react how you think though. He becomes shy and politely just sits there, face blushing bright red. 

“Can you believe she did that? My face was so hot I thought it was going to melt off.”

He wouldn’t be able to stop blushing, and would just be speechless the rest of the night. 

Originally posted by seokjins-wings

Yoongi: 

You would think he would be put off or irritated, because Yoongi has self proclaimed that he doesn’t need a girlfriend/ doesn’t have time for that stuff. 

However he would be such a fluff-ball about it. Yoongi is a simple man, and like all simple men he likes a pretty girl. 

So you sitting in his lap would not be a hindrance. 

“This awards show has been amazing.”

“I hope she’s at the next one, might actually make it worth going to.” 

Originally posted by sugagifs

piethecreator  asked:

Knowing your other blog, I would like to know if this Blog is SFW? I want to show my siblings so I gotta know first.

there is:

  • gore
  • romance
  • hints of love making (as in they’ll do it and it ends) (or they already did it off screen)
  • different sexualities
  • foul language

you know that stuff that’s not into to much kids cartoons

only full blown sexual intercourse isin’t allowed, so yeah, this blog is kinda SFW

Byun Baekhyun//True Colours

Summary: You attend a supernatural college, and after an eventful first meeting, you develop a heavy dislike for Baekhyun, as he’s your natural rival - a vampire. But things are strange for you, because as the months go by, you can’t figure out if you’re simply using the rivalry as an excuse to avoid facing your fears.
Scenario: college!AU, supernatural!AU, angst
Word Count: 7,599

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