i like my eyebrows here okay

Monsta X Reacts to Finding Their GF’s “Toy”

Request: Hi! How would the MX members react if they found their girlfriends “toy”? :D Thanks <3 I love your blog :)

Shownu: *blinks slowly with blank expression, slowly furrows eyebrows as he seriously begins to think about it* “but like…we have sex. like a lot of sex. like, how do you find time to…?” 
It would take him awhile to process, but he’d eventually come to terms with it. 

Originally posted by trainingpanda

Wonho: he would give this little, knowing grin as soon as he saw it. i know the boy says he’s going to stay celibate but in my humble opinion THAT IS A DAMN LIE. you can not ooze sex and not claim to have any. he would be like “okay, i get it, but also, i’m here. with all dis dick, so like utilize the real thing. i will take one for the team. you don’t have to worry about my well being. just use me. i will be your toy.”

Originally posted by monstaxs

Kihyun: he would be mildly shocked at first. He’s kind of the mother and caregiver for the group, so you may get scolded for leaving it somewhere someone could find it. 
after a few moments, and actually thinking about it, he’d probably pull out some bullshit like “but…you should probably show me how you use it. you know…for science.”

Originally posted by wonhontology

Minhyuk: *cue the nervous laughter* he’d shrivel into a ball of secondhand embaressment, blushes, and general cuteness. “Of course i know what it is jagi, it doesn’t mean i’ve ever SEEN one before.”
i think it could be a learning/discovery session shortly after, so he can learn to assist you and use the toy in the bedroom to bring things up to the next level. 

Originally posted by beastdw

Hyungwon: *half lidded eyes* “so you’re telling me, doing this doesn’t make you even more tired than when we have sex?” 
I feel like Hyungwon would be barely fazed. He’d get confirmation as to what exactly it was, how it worked, and kind of nod in a newfound understanding. Then he’d roll back over and take a nap to “better process the information.”

Originally posted by hyungvon

Jooheon: he’d totally see it and his eyes would grow in size and his jaw would drop. After realizing you were watching him, he’d immediately try to switch it to swag mode and act totally cool about it. “yeah, i totally knew what that was. you ain’t gotta tell me. psh, I know i make you feel at least fifteen times better than that thing. whatever it happens to do. which i totally know, but i’m just testing you to know if you know.”

Originally posted by honeypup

I.M.: he’d start blushing, but homeboy would probably have a matching one. yeah, he’s the maknae, but i’m totally convinced he’s NASTY. After giving you a tough time after he found it, he would probably try some line like: “want me to teach you how to use this thing properly jagi?” but would totally become a blushing mess once the time came. 

Originally posted by eunhasmom

Imagine Nick protecting you from your abusive boyfriend

Requested by anon. 

Warning: Mentions of abuse, Angry; Nick, Upset; Reader

Keep reading

Mystic Messenger Genderbent

AKA the AU that no one asked for.

I would really appreciate it if you guys liked, followed, and shared my account! I’m new, so I’m trying to dabble in everything to see how it goes.

Without further ado, I present: Mystic Messenger Characters Genderbent!


- Let’s be real here. Zen is #goals as a guy

-but as a girl

-he’s #GOALS

-Highlight on fleek

-Eyebrows so sharp they could murder someone

-Zen’s eyeliner wings could fly if they wanted to

-hair can look perfect no matter what style its in


-Okay, enough with how amazing he would look as a girl

-Flirting game is on point, can get anyone (anyone) to go on a date with her

-Zen is extremely flexible as a girl because he’s a dancer (guys usually aren’t as flexible when dancing compared to girls) so she literally sits in splits whenever to stretch 

-Speaking of flexibility

-Zen would cancel everything if she caught wind that her squad was going out



-sowwy I nearly exploded imagining Fem! Zen seducing everyone by wearing a scandalous dress out on a squad night

-Loves wearing ball gowns during formal occasions, loves feeling like a princess

-Overall amazing 

-I wish Zen was a girl now but he’s already perfect as a guy


-Hair still short considering Fem! Yoosung can barely use makeup and couldn’t  be bothering to style her hair 




-Usually get’s Zen to do her makeup when it comes to dates and such

-Smol bean just loves swimming in sweatshirts okay

-Fem! Yoosung loves to date only because 

1. Free food on dates 

2. Extreme cuddles and love all around (my baby just wants warmth okay) 

3. can finally get Zen to stop pointing out every damn guy when they go out together

-Loves to shop at Pink because it makes her feel so much more feminine considering she doesn’t act like a girl

-Insecure about being a girl because everyone assumes she’s a girl 

-Will literally cry every time she get’s her period though

-Yoosung is already sensitive and can’t handle that okay


-I feel like Jaehee would be less rebellious and confident as a man

-But once you get to know him

-You discover that Jaehee is just really, really shy and has to put up a facade of calm and serene image

-Doesn’t wear fake glasses because Fem! Jumin is a little more lenient

-One time, Male! Jaehee was taking care of Elizabeth the Third

-And the cat decided that his head was a very nice place to sleep on

-Fem! Jumin accused him of bonding with his cat when his cat was the one who seems to like Jaehee more than her

IDK, I feel like Male! Jaehee would be very similar to regular Jaehee personality wise, so this was quite difficult


-More friendly, in a way

-Woman are supposed to be gullible, easily charmed, and polite (unlike men)

-So, Fem! Jumin was educated to be nicer and more naive in order for certain deals to come through

-Even though she is bloody brilliant and can’t deal with some of the shit that men do to her

-All for the company

-Owns at least 100 different party dresses, ranging from delicate and innocent to seductive and alluring

-Once was caught on an outing with V, which started



-She nearly hurled her high heels at the reporter who asked her about it and her opinions on the statement


-Lets be real

-Saeyoung was fabulous when he crossdressed


-Of course

-He’s absolutely fantabulous (her words not mine) as a girl

-She includes Hershey bars with her Dr. Pepper and Honey Buddha Chips stash for emergencies

-No girls a girl if they don’t have chocolate

-Saeyoung’s route would be more sad if he was a girl though because most girls have a higher hormone level than men, meaning Fem! Saeyoung may have had a worser case of depression

-Loves to troll people by saying she’s actually a guy while hacking

-”No one would suspect innocent me~”

-Actually has pickpocketed strangers and can take anything she’d like

-So kawaii

So I drifted in and out of sleep a lot last night, and the times I was conscious I kept thinking about @mysdrym’s post about unicorns in Thedas. That led me here.

“Okay, okay. I have another one.”

Alistair looks up at Kate with a small smile and a quirked eyebrow, waiting for her question. It’s become something of a game with them; any time one of them has a question about the other’s world, it begins like this.

When she’s sure she has his attention, she says, “Unicorns.

Alistair barks a surprised laugh, sitting up so he can face her. This pulls his hair out of reach of her stroking fingers and she frowns before turning towards him to rest her arm along the back of their couch.

“Out of everything that’s different between our worlds, that’s what you want to talk about?” he asks, moving to grab her outstretched fingers to intertwine them with his. 

Embarrassment and amusement war on her face, but she settles for narrowing her eyes at him. “Cadash had that bog unicorn,” she says. “Do you have regular unicorns?”

“Do you have ‘regular’ unicorns?” he asks, still grinning at her put-upon expression.

She makes Cassandra’s disgusted noise. “No. Horses and narwhals only.”

“Narwhals?” he repeats, and she waves him off.

“Unicorns,” she insists, pointing the fingers of her free hand at him. “Do you have them, and can I meet one?”

His grin only grows. “Do I have any unicorns…”

She swats at his chest. “Would you be serious for a minute? This is a real question.” When he doesn’t answer right away, she pulls at the dragon scale she still wears around her neck. “There are dragons here, why wouldn’t there be unicorns?”

Alistair grabs for her hand and pulls it to his face so he can kiss her knuckles. “If there ever were any unicorns, they’ve been hiding from people for a long time. If you want to see a dragon, though, I could probably arrange something.”

He regrets the offer as soon as her face lights up.

!!! alexei mashkov as a hired thug who occasionally works for the italian mafia and kent parson as the nhl superstar who was recently traded to the islanders and did not ask to get in this mess

part 1 

In the morning, Alexei “Tater” Mashkov works as the nice owner of La Grotta Ristorante. He says hi to his customers, brew them up some strong Russian coffee, and serves it with biscotti.

“One hundred percent Italian cookie,” he told William Pointdexter once. 

Pointdexter, who inherited his father’s name and looks but his mother’s family, only raised an unimpressed eyebrow and took at bite.

“Okay, this does taste like what my Nonna would make,” he had agreed reluctantly. “But this isn’t what I’m here for.”

“You look like nice law abiding Irish man, why you call me for something else?” But Alexei is already taking off his apron and handing it off to Bitty, who was working the registry. 

“We’re shorthanded,” is what Pointdexter said tersely. “You don’t need to know anything, all we need are your fists.”

“I know nothing,” Alexei shrugged. That was false. He knew practically everything, from Pointdexter’s nickname to his mother’s elopement and subsequent return. More importantly, he knew about what’s making Pointedexter tense and jittery, and it’s not just because of how much the young man wanted to prove himself to the family.

In the morning, Alexei “Tater” Mashkov works as the nice owner of a hole in the way authentic Italian restaurant. Occasionally, he steps out of that role and cracks his knuckles and proceeds to disarm the man about to shoot his current client’s brains out. It was all very picturesque, they were even in an abandoned alleyway. 

Crack- that’s a dislocated shoulder for sure. Pointdexter looked ill  at the sight and so young, and Alexei took pity on him. 

“Who this tiny man who wants to shoot this member? You know him? What he done to you?” He purposefully dropped the articles and thickened his accent. Alexei still had the man in his grasp and shook him. 

“None of your business, you Cossack,” the gunman growled. “You’re taking pointers from someone, eh, Dex? Even know where to get Tater to help you.”

Pointdexter punched him in the solar plexus. “That’s none of your business.”

 “H-holy shit,” someone gasped. 

The three of them snapped their head around. At the edge of the alleyway, in shorts and sneakers, was a very shocked young man who had his phone out, obviously ready to call the police. The man himself was shocked by the outburst, and looked like he was ready to run away from the three crazy guys he saw in the back alley.

Alexei squinted at him, because he looked familiar. 

Oh. Oh. Oh wow. That was Kent Parson, three time Stanley Cup Champion. That was Kent Parson most likely taking a picture of Alexei and Pointdexter holding someone hostage and that was definitely Kent Parson who’s running away right now, probably to call the police. 

Alexei should probably be chasing him down, but all he could think about was the fact that they were in the middle of the hockey season and the Aces weren’t due to play either the Islanders or the Rangers, so why would Kent Parson be jogging in New York? Unless…

He gasped.

Pointdexter panicked, trying to ask him what was wrong, should they chase the guy? 

“The Aces traded their captain to New York?!! How I not know this yet?!!!”


“Okay okay, I chase. You hold on to this guy.” 

Hopefully Kent Parson hadn’t gone that far yet, because Alexei really needed to convince him not to call the police. And also he really wanted an autograph. 

How are you doing? They ask with eyebrows furred together.
How am I doing?
I’m laying on dirt that’s cracked like the pieces you once filled in my heart.
This dirt is trying to heal and connect itself with the older dirt
I’m laying next to the dirt with little sprouts of grass popping through
Your bodies under there
Under this cracked dirt, spouts of grass trying to grow, and a few straggling weeds
I lay here, coddling the broken ground, trying to find comfort in that your under there.
You’re not alive, but the body I once hugged, laughed with, cried with, sang with, strived with, it’s under there
I lay here and update you on everything
Today would have been your 22nd birthday
I lay here and yell at you and cry and sing
And try to catch my breathe so that I can tell you I love you
But I can’t stop looking at the cracked dirt
Hoping you’ll just come up and this can just be one sick joke
—  Cracked dirt (L.G.)
vkook taking a shower
  • Taehyung: jungkookie !!
  • Jungkook: wait what the fuck are you doing in here im taking a shower hyung get out
  • Taehyung: but we're late and I really really really don't want to smell bad /pouts/
  • Jungkook: no stop—fuck hYUNG STOP THIS IS MY PRIVACY
  • Taehyung: /slides into the shower/ why, is little jungkookie embarrassed
  • Jungkook: what do you mean little jungkookie-
  • Taehyung: of course little jungkookie here /points at Jungkook's head/ and little jungkookie down heeerre~ /wiggles eyebrows and points at-
  • Taehyung: you're cute awe little jungkookie is so cute I want to tie a bow around him
  • Taehyung: you're right, it does. it kinda sounds like I'm talking about your little-
  • Jungkook: nOT little but okay okay stop just—take your stupid shower and get out
  • Taehyung: okay just let me reach for the shampoo- /reaches his arm over Jungkook's head, leaning into the other's chest/
  • Jungkook: stop stop too close man- /presses his hands on Taehyung's chest and leans into the wall/
  • Jimin: /bursts through bathroom door/ jEOON JUNGKOOKIE IM COMING IN-
  • Jimin: /drops towel/
  • Jimin: /gasps dramatically/
  • Jungkook: oh
  • Taehyung: hi jiminnie it's a little squished right now you can come back next time !!
  • Taehyung: oh shit
Just Acting

Hi, i have a request for a fic where you are an actress and you’re going to have a bed scene in your next movie, but you lack experience, so you ask taehyung if your acting is good enough 😉😉

~Here you go darling! I hope you like it!~


Taehyung sat on the other side of your couch reviewing your script while you sat staring at him, waiting for him to get done. He finally looked up from the script  

“Why did you tell me to read this?” He asked  

“Because I need your help.”

“With what?” He said raising an eyebrow

You sighed “With the sex scene.”

“Oh.” He looked back down at the script “Ooooooh!” He stifled a laugh “But you’re a grown woman.”

“Your point? What if my moans and facial expressions are awkward?”

“Okay, moan for me.”

Your face got a little red from the request but you did it. You made sure you scrunched your eyebrows and that your mouth parted in a perfect o.

“No, stop. That looks to unnatural. Picture something that turns you on and try again.”

You pictured Taehyungs soft lips against yours. Your tongue fighting for dominance over his. He then broke the kiss, moving his mouth to your neck and biting down lightly. You moaned without thinking about your expressions.

“Now it looks like you’re constipated.”

“You’re supposed to be helping me.”

“Okay do you have a mirror?”  

“Yeah, there’s a closet mirror in my bedroom.”

“Then come on.” He said standing up.

He grabbed you by your hand a pulled you up from the couch, he held in a firm grip. When you got to the bedroom he sat you down on the bed, facing the mirror. He got behind you and rested his chin on your shoulder. You could feel his boner on your back. You felt your mouth go dry.  

He ran his hands up and down your stomach as tension fills the room.  "I want you to focus on your expressions.“ He breathed, choking on his own lust. You nodded.

His hands parted ways. One went up your shirt while the other one found its way pass your jeans lining. His right hand worked on your nipple, twisting it and tugging on it.  

"You’re so wet.” He said in between the open mouth kisses he was giving your shoulders.

He had started rubbing little circles where a wet spot was forming  on your white panties. You watched as you chest started falling up and down faster. His touch felt like it left little droplets of fire on your skin.

You let out a slight moan as he bite down on your shoulder and started adding more pressure on your clit. You reached behind and put your hand on the back of his neck. You put your other hand on his wrist trying to make him ass more pressure but if anything he added less pressure.  

He moved your soaked panties over and pushed a finger in your entrance. Making you throw your head back. He pumped his finger in and out of you in fast pace. He added another finger as you started grinding down.  

“Fuck, you’re so hot. I can’t wait to fuck you.” He whispered in your ear in husky voice before nipping at your lobe.

He pulled his fingers out and held them up to your mouth, you happily took them and sucked on them like they were the real thing. He flipped you on your back and started kissing down your neck while he unbuttoned your jeans. He trailed his tongue along your jawline and meet you for a heated kiss. He battled your tongue as he pulled your jeans off you. He broke the kiss, pulling at your bottom lip. He bite his tongue in between his teeth as he pulled off your shirt. Next he pulled off his own clothes as you undid your bra.

He licked his lips when he saw your boobs hanging free. You felt a lump in your throat when you saw his long member. He rubbed his tip along your slit a couple of times, making you whine with need. He suddenly pushed himself into you, feeling you up completely. You gasped and arched your back as he picked up his pace.

“Fuck!” He grunted “You’re so tight.” He breathed.

He rolled your nipple in between your teeth while you cursed to yourself. You looked at the mirror which was showing you with your back arched as Taehyung thrusts into you. You wrapped your legs around his waist, wanting to feel him deeper inside of you. He started to hit your g-spot with ever thrust.

Your moans filled the room, covering up his curses and moans. Soon you were thrown off your edge. Your oragasm racked through your body making you shiver but he wasn’t done yet. He started thrusting into you even harder  

“Oh shit!” You screamed, wrapping your arms around his neck.  

He scrunched his eyebrows as he felt you tightening around him. He flipped you over so that you were on top. He digged his fingernails into your slides, guaranteeing bruises. He brought you up and down on his cock, making the sound of skin against skin fill the room.

A long stream of curses left your mouth as you orgasmed a second time. This time he orgasmed with you, cussing loudly while he filled you up with his seed. He pulled you off of him  and layed you next to him. His bangs stuck to his forehead with sweat. You both were breathing heavily.

“Tae, that was amazing!” You breathed “But you do know his dick isn’t actually to be inside of me.”

“Wait. You’re not starring in a porno? It’s okay I’ll try helping you again tomorrow.”


“And the words just flowed out her fingertips like water in a river, flawlessly and clear, as if it were her own story to cherish and protect, her own story to tell the world.”

hEY HEY @jilliancares UNDERCOVER ANONYMOUS HERE. Well not anonymous anymore *wiggles eyebrows*. I ended up making a quote for you, it wasn’t difficult at all, those were the words that first came when i thought of you.
I’m also that annoying girl that sent you an ask about how much im dying because i want to read TBB (and now that I accidentally read that they kissed the temptation is strong) but that im saving it until is complete, lel.
After you answered my ask i felt the sudden urge to make you something because you always give us and i just wanted to show you my gratefulness (is that a word?) by giving you something and when inspiration comes, you better take it gurl.
Even if I already said it, thank you for your stories, I know it takes time to make them, and I find so unfair that fanfiction writers are so underrated so I wanted to show you that all your effort doesn’t go to waste, that we love every tiny little bit of it. So THANK YOU VERY MUCH<3
And before I lose my confidence to post this here we go~

Daddy's Help Derek Luh Imagine (request)

Can I have a Derek imagine where he has a daughter and she gets her period? You can chose the rest. Thanks

“Dude where’s y/n I want some of her famous chicken salad, that shit is the bomb”

“Swazz she’s at work she insisted that she had to go to work today but honestly I thin-” I was caught off by the 13 year old daughter calling me

“Dad….” I heard Kendall say but she sounded like she was crying a little

“Yes baby?” I yelled back waiting for her response but it never came

I furrowed my eyebrows confused a little , “Okay guys I’ll be right back”

Once I reached the stairs I went into Kendall’s room but she wasn’t in there but I saw here bathroom light on

I walked over to the door and slightly knocked, “Kendall baby are you okay?” But no answer all I heard was Kendall crying

“Come on Kendall open up the door and tell daddy what’s wrong” I twisted the door knob but it was locked, then I heard my angels voice.

“Dad it happened”

I didn’t know if I heard her right “What baby?”

The door knob twisted, and the door opened. Kendall peaked her head out and once she saw I was the only one in here she opened the door all the way.

My eyes widened blood all over her toilet seat, some on her rug then I saw her pants with blood all over them.

“Dad it happened” she said tears coming out of her eyes.

Talking about ‘it happened’ means she started her period. Her mother talked to her about this that it’s going to happen soon so we had to be prepared. Y/n and I talked about saying what I had to do if it happens when she was not here but I already kinda knew what to do. When y/n and I were together before marriage y/n had her period and I took care of her so that’s what I’m gonna do with my angel.

I got on my knees grabbing out for her hands which she accepted to do, “Kendall its alright okay, remember the talk you had with mom?” She nodded “Well she had the talk with me so I know what to do.

I got up from my knees, “Okay first your gonna pick out new clothes while I’ll go tell the guys to leave okay” Kendall slowly let go of my hands going to her dresser, and I went downstairs

“Okay guys you have to leave”

“But we just -” Sam was saying but I just cut him off

“LEAVE now” all the guys quickly got up and left

Once I got back upstairs Kendall was done getting her clothes but she was still crying

“No baby don’t cry your going to fine”

I grabbed her hand taking her to y/n and I bathroom. I went to the shower and turned it on “Okay you gonna take a warm shower rinse off your body, then when you get dressed,” I went under the sink and grabbed a pad “So you remember what mom said to do with this” Kendall nodded “Put your underwear on first before anything else okay” she nodded again. I reached up to wipe away her tears “Your fine don’t cry your to pretty to cry, now after you take a shower we are gonna watch some of our favorite movies and eat ice cream” I grabbed a hold of her cheek pinching it like I did when she was a baby

Kendall swatted my hand away, then smiling at me. As I left the bathroom Kendall said something

“Thank you daddy” she tucked a pice of hair behind her ear

“Your welcome baby” I smiled at her

nochuism  asked:

[i didnt know if i should send it back to you, but here i am lol answer it if you want skjfhskj] Once you get this you have to say five things you like about yourself, publicly. Then, you have to send this to ten of your favorite followers. (non-negotiable, positivity is cool~)

well damn… now i gotta think of five more things…

LOL i’m joking. it’s okay; thanks for sending this! I’d love to answer it <3 since i did more personality-esque things last time, i guess i’ll do physical things?? so, i like:

  1. my eyebrows (most of the time at least lol)
  2. my lips (they’re small but pretty plump; my grandmother calls them “pocahontas lips” lmaoooo)
  3. my hands (i supposedly have pianist hands, but i stopped going to piano lessons when i was in middle school… so what a fail)
  4. my height (i’m 5′5″ - not too tall or too short)
  5. my style (that i’m too broke to fully embrace lmao)
Girl Meets Sleepover, Part 1

Maya finds out Farkle has been hiding something. 

OTP: Riarkle, Honorary Mentions of Zayadora and Lucaya

BrOTP: Larkle, Markle 


I’m working on my desk as Maya walks in. I smile at her and she smiles at me, and I say, “Nice of you to drop by.” b equals to 476 which equals to 2 multiplied by a.

She smiles. “My apartment was lonely.” Divide by two, a equals to 238.

I laugh. “That must be rare. Why didn’t you go to Riley’s?” Next question.

She stared at her fingers. “I needed to talk to you.”

I swivel my chair around face her. “Everything okay?” I furrow my eyebrows, because something must obviously be wrong if Maya was here, in my room, instead of Riley’s.

“I know you like her.”

I raise my eyebrows. “You’re going to have to be more specific. Brenda? Sarah? Who?”

“I know you like Riley.” My smile freezes on my face. Abort, abort, mission abort. Run. No. Don’t run. Say something, genius.

“Of course I like Riley. I like you. I like Brenda. I like Sarah.”

She finally looks up. “You know that’s not what I’m talking about.”

I grin. “What are you talking about then, Maya Penelope?”

“Stop that.”

My façade falls apart. “Stop what?” I ask, exasperated.

“Stop pretending everything is okay.”

“Everything is okay, Maya. Smackle is with Zay, Lucas is with you, we’re all happy.”

I notice how her ploy changes. Her body shifts, her hand is on her hip, her head tilts. “Are you jealous, that Smackle is with Zay?”

I roll my eyes. “No. I told him to ask her out. Smackle deserves someone who can treat her better than I did.”

“Yeah, why do you suppose that is, Farkle? Why couldn’t you treat her right?”

I know that she knows the answer to this, and she knows that my answer hurts. It hurts. “Because. Because I couldn’t love someone who couldn’t make me love myself.”

“Why couldn’t she make you love yourself?”

“Stop it.” I rage. “Stop asking me questions that you and I both know the answer to.” My voice is coarse, and fury is like hot molten lava, flowing over the cracks in my voice.

“I want to hear it from you.”

“I couldn’t handle it that someone was better than me. I’m a loser. I will not dictate the world, Farklenation is dead and I will probably also never own Minkus International. Are you done? Are you done, Maya?” I burst.

A sombre expression plants itself onto her face like a parasite. “You need someone who erases squeaky the mouse.”

I have nothing to counter that. “Did it hurt?” She tries one more time.

I look at her, silently asking her to explain her question. “Did it hurt every time Riley was with Lucas? Did it hurt, looking at her? Because I know whenever Lucas and Riley were together I almost couldn’t stand it. I hated looking at him, at them, and it took all of my self-control to not rip them apart.”

I don’t answer. Squeaky the mouse has taped my lips shut. “I know you stepped back,” says Maya.

And then, I do find it in me to lie, lie one more time. “Look, Maya. I’m really sorry you had to go through all of that for the longest time, and I’m really happy that you’re with whom you want to be, alright. But, I’m not you. I didn’t step back for anyone. I didn’t.”

“I didn’t know scientists lie that well.”

“I’m not lying.”

“You are.”  

“What proof do you have? I needs me my proof.”

“Fine. Let’s play this your way. I see the way you look at her. You saved her life twice, when all I did was stand there and ask her to lift her head. You figured out what she was going through the moment she entered dark Rileytown. You knew her feelings within minutes. You see through her. No one will love her the way you do, and I see that.”

“I do love her, Maya. She’s my best friend. As are you. And I love you too, Maya.” Yes, good job. You love them both equally. Play that angle.

“And I love you, Farkle. That’s why I am here. I need you to wake up and realize it’s always been Riley. You said it yourself. Riley will find love again.”

Love. What is that? A hormone released by the brain triggered by the senses, right? Every emotion is a hormone released by a part of your brain that gets influenced by something you felt. Nothing more.

“Look, even if I loved her in that way, which I don’t, we will never happen. Do you get that? Because Riley deserves so much more! Riley deserves someone who can love himself, who understands love, the universe, she needs a knight in shining armor. She needs someone who can treat her like a princess. I can’t do that. I can’t do that, I will never be able to do that, I will never get a chance to do that. Do you get that, Maya? All I am is Farkle Minkus, best friend of Riley Matthews. My story doesn’t go beyond that. And I learnt that a long time ago. And I coped with that. I coped with that fact, alright.”

She sits on the bed. She takes a deep breath. And she blinks back tears. She sighs. I stand, there, a frozen useless goose.

“That’s why.”

“What?” I ask her.

“Number 1, you do love her in that way. Number 2, Riley will never settle for anyone less than you. Number 3, and there is no one more than you, Farkle. Number 4, she needs someone who treats her like a human being with feelings, needs and wants. Which you do. Have always been doing. Number 5, your story goes so much more beyond best friend. You guys go to college, you get Minkus International and Farklenation, you guys get to raise eleven marvelous kids and you guys will own the first mansion on Mars.”

My voice, when it finally comes out, is tired, and probably does not belong to me. “Maya, stop playing cupid.”

“Fine. Then I’ll play Farkle. If you don’t tell her by the end of the week, this horn will blow.” She turns to leave, and it takes me an eternity to react. To react to my world falling apart.

“Maya, wait. You can’t.”

She turns around, and I realize that she’s quivering, shaking, cracking, maybe. “I can. You know why? Because I can’t watch you suffer anymore. I can’t watch your sad smiles when you look at her, because I know how it hurts. And I can’t watch you suffer without knowing why you are suffering. I can help, and I will. Remember. This horn blows at the end of the week.”

And she gains the leverage of the last word, and walks out of the door, leaving me with an ultimatum.

And a wrecked head.


I do my best to not look at Riley throughout the week. It isn’t easy, because we are Chemistry partners, and we had an assignment. I recall my most memorable assignment with Riley back in eighth grade, the one with the dirt marble. I remember looking at her through that clear water, thinking, she is my partner. Thinking, this feels right. Thinking, but never saying.

I’m a boy who thinks a lot. I don’t talk. Especially not about my feelings.

Riley waves a hand around my face, trying to get my attention. “Salts, maybe?” I smile at her, and I begin to examine the sample given to us, and I begin to note down my observations. She does the same, and we hand in our class assignments by the end of the lesson, to our Chemistry teacher, knowing fully well that was another A.

At lunch, we get our chicken pot pies and return to our table. Maya, with her packed lunch of a turkey sub, comes with Lucas, who is eating barbecue chicken and mashed potatoes, fresh from Zay’s mom. Zay and Isadora arrive at the table too, and I smile at her, and she faintly grins back. We are digging into our meals when Maya clears out her throat.

“Okay, guys, you know what’s happening this weekend?”
Riley looks up at Maya and smiles wide, and she says, “For my sweet sixteen?”
Lucas nods. Maya continues, “We are going to have a Sleepover Sunday.”

Zay shakes his head no. “What?” Lucas asks.

“Potatoes will never agree to having Lucas in his daughter’s room.” Zay had gotten into a habit of calling Mr. Matthews “Potatoes”, ever since he heard the love story of Cory and his Mashed Potatoes.

Maya smirks. “Hey, Mr. Matthews?” She calls. Mr. Matthews strides towards the table, and asks Maya what’s up. She presents a slip to Mr. Matthews, and says, “Will you please a sign this permission slip for me?”

He mumbles, “Sure,” and quickly scribbles his name on it, and then asks, “What’s it for?”

“So that we can have a sleepover for Riley’s birthday this weekend.”

He chuckles. “Maya, you don’t need my permission for tha-”

“Lucas is going to be there.”

“No. Nada. Zilch. Absolutely not. YOU PLAYED ME!”

Maya laughs in her 1950s Cheese Souffle, “What can I do, you’re such a Charleh!”

Mr. Matthews tries again. “No Lucas in the Matthews household, ever!”

Riley says, “Seriously? We’re not even dating anymore!”

It takes a moment for it to register in his face, and a while for it to register in my head that she’s actually fine. That she’s fine with Lucas and Maya going out together, that she probably gave Maya permission, like I gave Zay. I realize, she actually doesn’t like him.

As Mr. Matthews beams, “Oh, Yeah!” and walks away, a happy balloon starts inflating in my chest.


I drag Maya out of her Art Club meeting later during school. I just barge in, and drag her out. She protests, but the moment I glare at her, she surrenders to me.

She faces her back to the wall and asks me what’s going on.

“Do you think this is a game?”

She furrows her eyebrows and stands up straight. “What?”

“This sleepover? Is it really for her birthday?”

“Farkle…it’s her sixteenth birthday. It’s supposed to be special. We’ve never had a sleepover with all six of us before.”

“I wonder how else you’re going to make it special.”

“Farkle, if you do the right thing, you won’t even need to be scared by the end of the week.”

“And if I don’t?”

“Then if I’m going to pull a Farkle, I need me my audience.”

And then a wild idea plays itself in my head, circa New Years 2016, when I gave away something that was not mine. Us, on the rooftop, playing a game, talking, maybe, and then, suddenly, she says it. The looks on their faces, their looks, their how-could-you expressions, their solemn exits, and finally, her distraught reaction.

“Is this revenge for what I did two years ago?”

She shrugs. “Maybe. But I’m doing it to help you too. You know the truth is the best thing, then don’t hide it.”

“Maya, Riley was sure of her feelings. She was stepping back on purpose. I don’t know if this is true.”

“You’ve known since first grade, Farkle. If not first grade, then you’ve known it ever since you looked at her through that beaker. But you and your dumb-dumb heart, they denied everything. You’re too much sense. We might not be in middle school, Farkle, but Harper’s lesson is all the more important today, now. The stakes are higher.”

“Please, I’m begging you not to do this.”

“I need to go back to Art Club. I’ll see you Sunday, Farkle.”

And she disappears into the doorway, leaving me in the hallway, alone, one more time.


I go home and lie down on my bed, deciding to give myself a break. I listen to my music, ranging from Swedish House Mafia, to Fall Out Boy. The screaming and beats almost drown out the lovely Ping! Of my computer.

You have received a message from Friarinthehole.

I opened the window.

Friarinthehole: hey, is everyth gud?

Fmink: why wont it b?

Friarinthehole: idk, was everyth ok during lunch?

Fmink: yeah???

Friarinthehole: no
Friarinthehole: it’s just that
Friarinthehole: when maya talked abt the sleepover
Friarinthehole: u looked visibly disturbed

Fmink: just worried about homework

Friarinthehole: ???? i dont believe u

Fmink: srsly. i was

Friarinthehole: ??? Shes ur bff since forever
Friarinthehole: hardly think u wud be worried abt hw when shes turning 16
Friarinthehole: besides, its on sun, you have all of sat and fri

Fmink: why r u pushing this?

Friarinthehole: sorry for being concerned!!11 abt my best friends mental state!!11

Fmink: i think you confused me with joan d arc

Friarinthehole: srsly, is everyth ok? i mean it’s not just today. u seem in turmoi ever since the start of week
Friarinthehole: *turmoil  

Fmink: wth? i was just worried abt my education? sorry but not everyone is scholar athlete

Friarinthehole: what? ur the one who’s getting job offers from nasa  

Fmink: okok lmao. look, all is gud. Chill a bit, ok. U know if smth happened ull know…ill tell u

Friarinthehole: I know

Fmink: look, I need to finish homework 
Fmink: ill see u tmr

Friarinthehole: yeah ok bye

Friarinthehole has logged off.

I swivel my chair around and walk over to my bed and I collapse again, and I look at my motionless bedroom door, patiently waiting for it to open and for the Sandman to whisk me away to a beach where I can take a true vacation away from my life.

But the door is stubbornly shut.


A/N: Please give me feedback, and if you like to read more Riarkle fanfiction, please check out Girl Meets M T W T F S S ! Thank you! 

Sore loser.

For: @kiwixcalum513

Requests are open so send a message or an ask!

“Hello internet!” Dan started grinning at the camera. “So today I am here with my friend y/n. And we’re going to be cliche like in all the fanfictions and play Mario Kart.” He nodded in his normal manner.

“Okay okay, hi and all that.” You waved at the camera. Dan’s audience knew you well and you were more than aware that they shipped you, hard. “Dan you read fanfiction?” You quizzed up at him.

“Pfft, no, know back to Mario-”

“Wait and then you said ‘cliche’ meaning you must’ve read more than one.” You pointed out raising an eyebrow to the camera. 

“Shut up y/n now Mario Kart!” Dan ordered handing you a remote.

“Fine, I’ll drop it, for now.” You smirked setting up for the game.


Five rounds later and you were beating him like Phil could only dream of doing. 

“Seriously y/n!? How are you so good at this?” 

“It’s comes with not having a social life and a lot of free time.” You laughed back.


The games were finally over and Dan was greatly annoyed. You’d won.

“Y/n, seriously, how did you do that?” Dan was clearly pissed with you, but now it had taken a deeper tone.

“Dan what’s the big deal? I know you like Mario Kart but you sure take this personally, are you okay?”

“No,” He huffed at you. “You are so good at everything, I just can’t compete and it really annoys me.”

“Dan, you’re a tough one to beat and honestly you’re too good at everything, perfect even.” You commented looking at him.

Dan stopped the recording and looked back at you. “Y/n, listen, you’re perfect and I know I can be a sore loser. But I have to say this.”

“What?” You mumbled gazing at him.

“Yeah, I guess I’m a terrible loser and honestly, I think it was only because I thought that. Um, well, y/n I thought that if we were ever to go out or become a couple, I’d never win a Mario Kart round again.” Dan explained.

“Dan I can assure you that you’d win a round again.” Then it clicked, the fanfiction reading, you read some too and for a fact know that in most it was set out that you always won Mario Kart. “Fanfiction isn’t real.”

“You read fanfiction?” Dan laughed you cheeks shading in a pink tone.

“Sometimes, but it’s all just cliche and based of of our made up relationship.”

“Our?” Dan snapped back. You rolled your eyes embarrassed. “Well have you read that one where me and you get into intense Mario kart gaming and I accidently hit you with my remote?”

“Yes, maybe.” You lightly laugh at his odd question.

Bang. Dan hit you with the remote on your cheek and just hit the corner of your mouth.

“Dan! What the hell?” You groaned at the agony it caused.

“Oh I forgot to ask, do you want to reenact it?” 

“Well it’s a bit late don’t you think?” You held your face in pain.

“No that’s not all of it.” Dan smirked. You wracked your brains until it was cut short when Dan planted a sweet kiss where he hit you. he slowly moved away as you blushed furiously.

“You know, you didn’t have to hit me to get a kiss.”

“Pink and Purple” - Kurt/Blaine

“You are incredible, you know that? With or without the superpowers.”
“Superpowers…” Blaine echoes, shaking his head as he looks down at himself. “Is that what we’re calling them?” 

(At several readers’ request, and because I’m in love with Nightbird forever and always, here is a prequel of sorts to ”Black and Blue“ (READ THAT FIRST), in which Blaine has discovered that he actually has superpowers and becomes the hero of New York City. Because every superhero has an origin story.)

Warnings for: accidental roughness, and also purposeful sex-related roughness

~6,000 words | read on AO3

“Babe, have you seen my bowtie?”

“That’s like asking if I’ve ever seen a pigeon in New York.”

Kurt finally looks up from his laptop when Blaine is silent in response, glaring at him under furrowed eyebrows. “Okay, sorry,” he laughs. “Which bowtie, honey?”

“Pink, white, and purple plaid. It goes perfectly with—“ Blaine gestures at his pink polo and dark purple pants, then continues rifling through his dresser.

“The one you wore two days ago with the—”

“—white button-up and pink chinos, yes.”

“Well, it can’t have gotten far…” Kurt racks his brain, trying to remember. They’d met up for dinner after their classes, then came home and— “I threw it at the bed when I took your clothes off.”

“Oh! Let me see if it’s…” Blaine gets down on the floor, lying on his stomach, then lifts the duvet so he can check under the bed. “Good thing we clean regularly… oh, I see it! It’s—ugh, I can’t reach it.” Blaine starts trying to squeeze himself under the bed.

Kurt snorts at the sight of Blaine’s ass wiggling around as he moves. He’s about to ask if Blaine needs help when—

“AAAH!” The foot of the bed suddenly lifts, throwing Kurt backwards and wedging him between the pillows and the wall. He catches his laptop before it can slide back and hit him in the face, but just as he’s attempting to right himself, the head of the bed lifts too, the whole thing rising in the air with him still on it. “Blaine?!” 

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and i’m damned if i do and i’m damned if i don’t
so here’s to drinks in the dark at the end of my rope (x)

“Hi!” She greeted as she pushed her chair back to get out of her desk. “What are you doing here?”

“Can’t I surprise my girlfriend?” He inquired, taking a few steps toward her.

“Always, Oliver,” she said, standing in front of him. He smiled at her and then she was leaning up for a kiss.

His eyes fell shut as he sucked her bottom lip, his hands roaming over her back and finally settling on her waist. It was the hands on his butt that made him let go of her and take a step back.

“Actually, I came here for a reason.”

Felicity raised an eyebrow, taking her hands from his backside and slide them up his chest.

“Hmmm, okay. What do you need?”

“For you to come…”

“I like this already,” Felicity interrupted in a sultry tone. 

Read the rest here.

So grateful for the amazing help of my awesome friends: @effie214 and @so-caffeinated.

My army of readers under the cut. If you want to be tagged too, just let me know.

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The Signs' Go-To Comebacks

Aries : I’ll feckin’ burst ye, ye lil’ twat

Taurus : Wtf is your damage, you inconsiderate tool

Gemini : Okay uhmmm… no one here likes you anyways, soooo….

Cancer : Who made you this annoying? Why are you here?

Leo : You are the reason dinosaurs became extinct, you broken spoon

Virgo : The word and phrase you just used is actually incorrect. See, the word ____ means ____. You are such an imbecile!

Libra : …But you don’t have nice eyebrows…so…byeeeee

Scorpio : You’re so rude, that you make me want to sew my eyelashes to my fingernails 

Sagittarius : You should go fuck yourself, I hear you’re pretty good at it

Capricorn : You’re the reason fuckboys are still allowed at school

Aquarius : You couldn’t last a fuckin’ day at Hogwarts, you loser

Pisces : No wonder you don’t have friends, must have bitched them away


I could feel their eyes on me. They smirked as I walked a step behind Cassian, their wings fluttering. Their eyes were full of lust and it disgusted me. I was glad I didn’t have Feyre’s gift. I didn’t want to know what was going through their minds as their eyes strayed to my chest and didn’t move. I wasn’t used to being stared at like this.

It wasn’t flattering at all.

“Cassian,” I hissed his name. He glanced back at me as I grabbed his hand. He looked at me startled, “they won’t stop staring at me.”

He squeezed my fingers gently, “so I’ll introduce you as my sister,” he said quietly so our guide couldn’t hear.

“Husband,” I whispered back, “they won’t be scared of a brother. Just. For our stay here.”

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