i like it when people have connections to my home state

5 Reason’s Why Supernatural is the Gayest Show on Television (That’s Still Stuck in the Closet)

To start with, I’m not delusional.  I’m fully aware that the studio and execs have settled into a comfortable pattern with Supernatural, and especially considering it’s heavily mixed demographic (interestingly, it was ranked a favorite among republicans and democrats in 2016) they’re unlikely to rock the ship with a canonically queer relationship between two of it’s main characters.  

However, it’s important to understand exactly how much queerness is bubbling beneath the thick surface layer of “no homo:”  from the orgies of male-on-male eyesex to the inspiration for most of its main characters, Supernatural is queer to its very core. 

Here are five (blaring but stubbornly unacknowledged) reasons why:


1.  Dean’s gratuitously bisexual inspiration. 

Whenever someone claims a queer interpretation of Dean is baseless, I’m always happy to direct them straight to his flamingly bisexual source:  Dean Moriarty, his namesake and direct inspiration, a la the novel On the Road.  

Admittedly, I read On the Road and didn’t particularly enjoy it, as I found it to be a somewhat masturbatory reassertion of masculinity for its narrator, Sal Paradise.  Sal idolizes and fixates the charismatic Dean and his promiscuous lifestyle, openly having sex with and impregnating multiple women, and is all around a heterosexual power figure…right up until the point at which Dean propositions a male prostitute.  

Though he’s never shown doing anything gratuitous with male characters (since the book was published in the 1960s, it wouldn’t have been legal to) it’s clear that Dean is very much bisexual, not ashamed of it, and in terms of personality, very similar to Dean.  There are a few key differences (Dean Moriarty, for example, legitimately gives zero fucks about anything, whereas Dean Winchester is secretly a little ball of anxiety with the weight of the world on his shoulders) but it’s clear where Eric Kripke got his inspiration from.

Moreover, Dean Moriarty was in turn based off of the real life bisexual counterculturist Neal Cassady, who among other things had a twenty-year sexual relationship with a male poet.  Here, he is pictured in a Denver mugshot: 

So next time someone tells you the homoerotic subtext of Supernatural exists only in the imagination of rabid fangirls, remember that Dean is the direct descendant of two ragingly bisexual icons.

2.  Castiel (or at least his wardrobe) was also based off of a bisexual character.

For a show so aggressively devoted to a “no homo” interpretation, it has a real propensity to drawing inspiration from queer characters:  everyone’s favorite baby in a trench coat, for example, was modeled after the demon-busting John Constantine from the Hellblazer comics.  Yup, another bisexual.   

Though in true assbutt fashion, his love of men is censored in movie and TV adaptions, Constantine unabashedly swings both ways in paper form – a.k.a. where Kripke found inspiration for Castiel’s look.  Here, we see him platonically receiving a man-hug from one of his bros:

So I’m not saying the fact that two out of three main characters are modeled after canonically queer figures could have anything to do with Supernatural’s gratuitous queer subtext, but y’know.  It might.

3.  Cas himself is sexually complex (and literally cannot be straight.) 

Dean has made reference to the fact that he “doesn’t swing that way” (ironically, both of which times he was literally in the midst of blatantly flirting with men.)  

Cas, however, has no such reservations:  he’s never indicated, vocally or otherwise, a preference towards either gender, so much as outright declaring that he doesn’t give a damn.  

He reacts to male and female flirtation much the same way:  just try and tell me his suspicious glower and Mick wasn’t similar to Mandy the waitress (and try and tell me they both weren’t acting like they’d like to eat him for dinner.)

Moreover, the only time we’ve seen him ever achieve some kind of intimacy with female characters is when they’re literally throwing themselves at him.  Hey, he’s an aesthetically pleasing fellow – or rather, an aesthetically pleasing something.  

Which brings me to my next point that he isn’t really a fellow at all:  Cas not only gives zero fucks about sexual orientation, he also gives zero fucks about gender.  Sure, he’ll spend seven years in the same ill-fitting trench coat, but he’ll also rock a petticoat like nobody’s business.

I’ve discovered that the writer for “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets,” Steve Yockey, is a gay man, which honestly makes it all the more perfect:  not only does it establish the Orlando-esque flexibility (or nonexistence) of Cas’s gender, but it eliminates the possibility of his straightness.  

And I want Destiel to be canon as much as anybody, but am I opposed to Cas being a genderfluid lesbian?  No.  No, I am not.    

4.  Dean can textually be interpreted as bisexual (and probably should be.)

For anyone who questions whether Dean not being straight as an arrow, I’m happy to point out some very canon things that happened on the show:

(Examples courtesy of @some-people-call-it-tragic!)

And yes, when feeling threatened, he’s professed not to swing that way.  But you know how many queer people I know who have at one point felt compelled to lie about our sexual orientation?  Every single one.  And I live in the bluest of blue states – Dean was raised in Bible Belt America and spends most of his time in the Southwest.  Not to mention the fact that he was raised during the heat of the AIDS academic.

In other words, he has every logical reason to be wary at the prospect of coming out of the closet, or even acknowledging same sex attraction at all.

Moreover it’s been canonically established that Dean has a habit of lying about himself to protect his image of masculinity:  according to Dean, he doesn’t do shorts, chick flicks, cucumber water, skinny jeans and sunglasses, and Taylor Swift music.  You know how many of those things he loves?  All of them

Finally, not every member of the cast or crew might agree (though I know for a fact that some of them do) but their interpretations do not effect textuality.  And Dean can textually be interpreted as bisexual.  

5.  Dean and Cas make a better couple than any of their love interests.

I’m going to state something I feel is obvious:  Cas and Dean have more buildup, tension, chemistry, emotional connection, and romantic history than literally any of their other interests.  

Take Lisa, for example:  she’s Dean’s longest lasting introduced as female partner, and she’s introduced as the “bendiest weekend of his life.”  

Furthermore, I’d argue that sexual attraction notwithstanding, Dean was never romantically in love with Lisa.  To him, she epitomizes his desire for a mother figure, a home, and his lost childhood, as is best demonstrated in his fantasy from “Dream a Little Dream of Me:”  Lisa isn’t a seductive or romantic figure here – she’s a maternal one. 

Though since Dean has never had a long lasting relationship (or, to my belief, been completely in love with a girl) it’s easy to see how he’d misinterpret these feelings as romantic love. 

Then we have Cas, who’s introduced by pulling Dean from the depths of hell, who makes most one-on-one scenes with Dean look like a soft core porno, and who recently (canonically!) declared his love for Dean.  

I don’t dislike Lisa, but it’s easy to see which of the two relationships is more three-dimensional, more original, and more worthy of screentime.

Moon thru the signs 🌙
  • Aries: emotionally comfortable in the thick of firey adventure, extremely uncomfortable with stagnation in life, things always need to be exciting, they are on the go go go towards new life, will shake things up even if that means they have to ruffle some feathers, they can't sit still with the concept of boring.. Feeling bored is something they have no patience for. The sense of Self is a strong component to their emotional balance.. "What do I need right now? Will this feel right for me? Is this what I want to do?" Aries is all about personal will. They need to feel like they are expressing that will in ways that ignite their passion. Being forced into exerting energy towards something they don't care about is a deep root of distress. Emotionally quick tempered, their emotions are always evolving and morphing into something new..their emotions hit them like fireballs that encompass their entire being.. In the heat of their emotions that moment is the biggest and most intense moment ever ever ever !!! ...for a few minutes.. Then they're onto something new. When your Aries Moon is flying around on fire in the heat of their emotions, sit with them and LISTEN to the experience they are having. A deep therapy for the Moon here is to be able to express their emotions to you within their personal "I" experience. They matter a lot to themselves. Hold space for this.
  • Taurus: slowww and calmmm, Apple pie and lemon balm... I've seen this placement be wonderful and disastrous.. These people are comfortable in their home, in sensual pleasures, earthly delights. In a lower context they are way too attached to the material world, they will acquire so much random stuff that they don't know what to do with themselves but they feel like they need all the stuff.. If they ever got to a moment where they needed something completely random and they didn't HAVE that random thing.. Well that would be distressing for them. While their dependence on the material world can hold them back at times, it is absolutely admirable just how deeply in touch with it they are. They take the home very seriously, they are ones who will just stay home and be grounded instead of going out and running around in life.. Like a happy bear in its cave.. Within that cave there they are listening to awesome beautiful music, making great food, working with herbs, stacking wood, loving their good company.. Why would they ever want to leave that ?? Because there's a whole world out there moon in Taurus.. A whole world:)their emotions hit them on a bodily earthly level where they process and move through the emotional realm with the help of the natural world.. A moon in Taurus needs to be connected with nature more than any other moon.. They are the grounded ass f**kers.. They are emotionally comfortable BEING grounded.. So on the flip side when they can't find grounding or comfort in their material home they are in a state of perpetual chaos..
  • Gemini: emotionally comfortable anywhere and everywhere!! As long as they're having fun and being stimulated by interesting things it's all good! Moon in gemini's really can and will talk to any sort of person. They are comfortable in any situation they are in. Moon in gemini's often have to learn how to find a home within themselves, they could be all dirty playing music on the side of the street with a nice hobo, or they could be in a rich million dollar apartment around a ton of people they don't know.. Where ever they are, they are super curious and interested in everything happening.. Happy to be there..Needing that stimulation from all things interesting.. They are very socially adaptable folk.. They know how to dissect conversation and meet people where they are at.. Which often entails them wearing a mask and not being their truest self.. Being who someone wants you to be in a situation.. It can be distressing at times once they realize how much energy they put into connecting with ones on a shallow level, it takes a lot out of them, they have to bring it back and realize.. Yes this is all fun and good but they ones who will feed my soul are the ones who KNOW my soul.. As for emotions.. It's mutable so the experience of emotions is very impacted from the rest of the chart but this conscious moon energy really rationalized and intelecualitzes emotions.. Sometimes they box their emotions up for a rainy day.. They need to learn how to let themselves feel emotions, they have emotions but they are literally capable of making themselves not feel them.. A way a moon in Gemini would relax and calm down would be through researching, chatting, and thinking about thing.. Here the moon lives within the mind. (My placement)
  • Cancer: to put it simply, uncontrollable emotional state. This is a beautiful thing.. Moon in cancers have an emotional inner world that renders a fine work of art.. So many colors. What they experience in the waters of human emotion is special and unique because the moons archetype is fully at home here.. The moon is felt deeply in this person.. There's so much beauty.. But the conflict here is that the cancer moon doesn't have control of their emotional state, so it can be really difficult to do things because their FEELINGS are first priority.. They are likely to feel more comfortable within the comfort of soft lights, warm tea, nice fireplace, and loving company. However this is fully dependent on the rest of their chart. Water signs are fluid. Maybe they are more emotionally comfortable partying and having adventure because of a Mars in Aries and a sun in Saggitarius.. no matter what influences their emotional world goes so deep. They care. They want to nurture. They FEEEEEEEL. The moon is integral for these people, its important for them to connect with the moon through ritual or meditation.. This will help balance their emotions.. Even if they don't understand it on a conscious level, creating a personal relationship with the moon will subconsciously help them with emotional balance. A moon in Cancer wants to make you feel safe. They want to take care of you and your emotions. They will give so much... Sometimes too much.
  • Leo: these ones feel comfortable in the spotlight, whether that is within an intimate relationship, their family, their social sphere, or literally on a stage.. their comfort state lies within broadcasting their life for all to see. They have a need to share everything.. they want to share themselves, share their experience, their relationships, even the clothing on their back. This moon energy is so warm and generous. In return, these ones need a lot of admiration, attention, and affection in their relationships, they need to feel validated through being so expressive or insecurity will arise. Moreso than other Leo placements, the Moon here truly needs that attention from others, their emotional state depends on it. They draw life energy through being among different influxes of energy and shining their bright creative light within it. As for emotions, they are dramatic, hopeless romantic sonnets of internal poetry for the ones they love, dramatic boisterous crying when a sharp chord is struck, or totally uncontrollable angry fire rage when provoked. A series of extremes. They must channel their emotions into creative expression, they must have people who can give them the attentiveness they need in their bouts of emotion. Pushing them away will hurt them. They want to be close to you, themselves, their life.. they don't want to feel separate and distant. You'll find your moon in Leo being the life of the party, the friend in the group who brings all of the creative fun, their light is strong.. Its their emotional state. This placement has its challenges but I find it so beautiful.
  • Virgo: A strong need for everything to be in order, for life to be in order in all of its finer details. Whether the moon in Virgo reaches that or not reveals their level of emotional balance. They are going through life on the outside looking in. Anylizing, discerning, critiquing, this will either be deeply channeled inward, outward, or both. If you meet a Virgo Moon who does have their life in order, looks put together, has a clean organized place to live, is actively working and integrating into the structure of the world.. They are probably emotionally balanced.. And their emotions express themselves as a steady stream of relaxation due to a success of implementing order in chaos. So on the flip side.. If you meet a Virgo Moon who, to put it simply, does not have their shit together.. They are likely extremely ungrounded with their emotions scattered everywhere and nowhere living in the mercury depth of their overactive mind. They process their emotions by THINKING, they need to understand everything about what it is they are feeling and why before they can ever reach a state of peace in that feeling. Overthinking, irrational worrying, vicious self criticism are shadow elements to this placement. This is a very challenging place for the Moon. The moon is the fluid intuitive waters of emotion and Virgo is the Mercury virginal energy of mental structure and organization fine tuning life to be perfect. They don't exactly mesh well together in their natural archetypes. However, if an individual has a well aspected Virgo moon or learns how to make good use of this placement.. its an extremely competent energy. Their life will be ordered and structured to the 9's.. No worry will ever need to surface about anything because they have their shit together in the most perfect way. And in that state they experience ultimate relaxation.
  • Libra: to feel emotionally comfortable these people need a balance. They need to feel like there is a balance in their workplace, relationships, home life, and within themselves. They need to feel like there is an equal contribution on the part of everyone involved in every aspect of life, that everyone is contributing equally to establishing a balance. If it's imbalanced there is distress.. A distress that either causes emotional turmoil or a distress that motivates them to mediate the energy of the imbalanced situation. They have a very calm and .. Well.. Balanced approach to their emotions. It hits them in an intellectual way where they really observe everything they are feeling and transmute it into a steady stream of balance. They could repress emotions because of this. If emotions are going upppp and doowwwwnn they are gonna try and pull it to the center and push it forward. A continuous evolution of feeling. This steady stream causes them to have challenge with experiencing intensity of emotion.. To experience the full spectrum of emotion.. They don't want their emotions to hold them back or bring them out of alignment in any way. Hence, the repression.. And repressing anything leads it to bubble up and explode... That's where the intensity comes in.. When the bottled up and down emotions are forced up to the surface they HAVE to face it and deal with it or else they feel unable to move forward. Another component to this placement is that they Deffinetly feel emotionally comfortable and fulfilled with Venusian things.. They are gonna really value art, atheistic beauty, the beauty of ones soul, physical features, and emotions.. Because it fills THEIR emotion to experience such pleasure. The pleasureful side of life integrates with them on a deep level. They are likely to be pretty romantic in relationships, they completely romanticize and paint their love emotions like a beautiful painting of exquisite design.. Whether the reality of the love experience lives up to that is either their emotional challenge or their emotional exaltation.
  • Scorpio: INTENSE EMOTIONAL WORLD. Uncontrollable deep waters of emotion like moon in cancer.. Accept in a life or death kind of way. Emotions go to the core of ones soul. "I LOVE you." "I HATE you" "You have BETRAYED me" "I NEED you" Nothing is shallow or superficial in their emotional world..they are literally incapable of that. These people will love you to death, litterally. There is a likely hood for possessiveness with this placement. A likelyhood for nothing to be taken lightly. I remember I was babysitting a moon in Scorpio girl one time and she dropped a bunch of cards or something and they were scattering everywhere inbetween the couch cushions. I watched this girl get so distressed, heavy breathing, intense look on her face, super not at ease as she was trying to collect everything that just fell apart. My Virgo self completely cleaned up and organized the cards for her. She was passionately thankful that turmoil was taken care of for her. These people are very perceptive.. They have a really acute sense of awareness in their surroundings.. The psychic eyes.. They pick up on the subtleties around them.. They are empathetic to the energies in their life. There is a strong possibility for metaphysical psychic ability with this placement of they are exalting their energy. A moon in Scorpio on the light side will have a deep power and capacity to have such an amazing passionate colorful emotional world. A less evolved moon here will be experiencing such intense emotions they can't help but burn bridges with people. Their emotional needs and requirements are strong. With this placement they are also likely to keep their emotions very secretive from the world. They don't think anyone needs to know what they are feeling. This can cause deception and being super guarded in themselves. On the flip side, there is a powerful opportunity for transformational beauty when they do open up their inner world to someone. I'd say overall moon in Scorpio is awesome but it's extremely challenging. Like the moon in any water signs- emotions come FIRST.
  • Sagittarius: ahh the endless explorers of life. These individuals need a sense of expansion in their life to feel emotionally fulfilled. They need hope, inspiration, purpose, a promise of adventure.. Of growth.. Of a new horizon. They are comfortable in the action of expansion, whether that is going to a new place, learning something, or integrating into new relationships. It's hard to emotionally pin them down. They are on the move in their fluid state. In a relationship they need some who can hold space and swim with their currents because of they are in a flux state of perpetual evolution in regards to their emotional world. Like moon in Gemini or Aries.. They are so forward directed with going towards some new energy with their emotions.. They can be flakey. With these folk there can be room for emotional shallowness. Not always, but Saggitarus is the one who wants to have fun! They are the lighthearted archers prancing through all of the parties and people and foreign lands. It is a potential challenge for them to get caught up in some dense, heavy, stagnant emotional turmoil. They don't want to experience turmoil, they want to be having a good time! However, this is a fire sign.. The heat of their emotions DOES hit them. It's not like moon in libra where intense emotions come in and immediately get brought to a neutral line of balance. No, the intensity of emotion IS there. It's a matter of them taking the time to let them go deep into uncomfortable emotions. They would rather not be concerned with uncomfortable emotional depth at all if they didn't have to. But they have to deal with it or they will totally explode into a fire ball of saggitarius aggression. Give your little moon in Saggi some space in the heat of emotional turmoil and know that with a gentle touch and soft heart they will come to a place of opening up their emotional world with you.
  • Capricorn: Emotions here are very guarded. This is a hard placement for the waters of the moon. One may even fear their emotions with this placement, they may be mechanical and cold in this sense. Their emotions will not be tolerated if it's holding them back in anyway. Their emotional comfort lies in knowing they are competently moving forward into success with their life. The feeling of having their shit together is key for emotional balance. A moon in Cap won't want to be held back due to their emotional world. This is powerfully beneficial because they can really get shit done without having to deal with any of that cancer moon emotional stuff. However unless there is water in other places in their chart.. It leaves them in a place of emotional lack. They just aren't capable of feeling to the extent that others do because they don't let themselves. And that can be a conflict in itself because maybe it would give them a deeper feeling of competence if they COULD feel how others do. They really need to feel safe and secure and sturdy before they open up their inner world to someone. You have to win their trust to get to break that shell. This placement has a lot of good potential but also an immense possibility for challenge. With any moon, especially this one, that is all correspondent to the other aspects in a chart.
  • Aquarius: Emotionally comfortable in the realms of individualism.. they like their own kind of music, their own style, their own unique "fit" into the world.. They are emotionally satisfied in their inner world of "ME". Not "me" in the bright beaming self-centered way of Leo, no, its in the sense of "I am standing here feeling so different than all of you people" Whether they find solace or distress in that.. its a deep archetype that they feel. These people are living on the outside looking in- they are extremely extremely observant. They often they feel separate and detached out in the world, observing, putting all of the pieces together like mechanical machinery. They are very interested in life, in you, in your thoughts, in why things the way they are. They are taking it all in. With their emotions they need a lot of space to process it. They can really distance themselves from their emotions and the people who are making them feel emotions. Emotions are a lot for them to intellectually grasp, they want to grasp and come to an understanding of every facet of it, and they need time on their own to do this. Theres also room with this placement for close mindedness towards other ways of doing things. There is a likely hood for these people to feel they are doing and handling things they absolute best way possible, better than anyone else, they know how to handle their emotions, their life, their inner world. Its possible for arrogance and ignorance to be found here. Maybe they do really know how to handle their inner world better than how you think they can..... But also maybe... They really could use a word of advice. Theres a rigidness to this moon placement. These people find self-justified satisfaction in doing things exactly the way they think they should do it, it eases their emotional realm. There is room for complacency in arrogance here as their is room for extremely positive inner innovation and evolution of self.
  • Pisces: Your inner world is the ocean. Where does it begin? Where does it end? You don't know, actually, no one knows. Your emotions are the definition of fluid. Interchangeable and uncontrollable. You are melting into your emotions. When you fall in love, you FALL in LOVE. When you feel sorrow, you FEEL sorrrrrrowww. Emotions are so real for you. You feel your emotions in your blood. Your emotional world is operating in the dreamstate. You are comfortable in ethereal experiences, the surreal beauty of nature, the most amazing poem recited at a word slam, looking deep into the eyes of your lover. Life just holds a more surreal note for you. When you feel emotionally comfortable, every single particle of who you are integrates into a peace and calm of giving everything to the moment of emotional comfort. When you feel emotionally uncomfortable, red sirens are going off in your being, everything is viciously not okay. You might have issues with boundaries, you let people in so deep into your emotional realm and you share so much. Yet, when you draw a boundary, you aggressively instate it into being. You want what you want, you may disregard what is good for you, or you may draw every boundary in the book to make sure whats happening is good for you. No matter what situation you're in- good or bad, you're in it for the feeling, for the essence, the energy. Moon in Pisces will bring you into a different world.
10

It’s a long-standing tradition for the sitting president of the United States to leave a parting letter in the Oval Office for the American elected to take his or her place. It’s a letter meant to share what we know, what we’ve learned, and what small wisdom may help our successor bear the great responsibility that comes with the highest office in our land, and the leadership of the free world.

But before I leave my note for our 45th president, I wanted to say one final thank you for the honor of serving as your 44th. Because all that I’ve learned in my time in office, I’ve learned from you. You made me a better President, and you made me a better man.

Throughout these eight years, you have been the source of goodness, resilience, and hope from which I’ve pulled strength. I’ve seen neighbors and communities take care of each other during the worst economic crisis of our lifetimes. I have mourned with grieving families searching for answers – and found grace in a Charleston church.

I’ve taken heart from the hope of young graduates and our newest military officers. I’ve seen our scientists help a paralyzed man regain his sense of touch, and wounded warriors once given up for dead walk again. I’ve seen Americans whose lives have been saved because they finally have access to medical care, and families whose lives have been changed because their marriages are recognized as equal to our own. I’ve seen the youngest of children remind us through their actions and through their generosity of our obligations to care for refugees, or work for peace, and, above all, to look out for each other.

I’ve seen you, the American people, in all your decency, determination, good humor, and kindness. And in your daily acts of citizenship, I’ve seen our future unfolding.

All of us, regardless of party, should throw ourselves into that work – the joyous work of citizenship. Not just when there’s an election, not just when our own narrow interest is at stake, but over the full span of a lifetime.

I’ll be right there with you every step of the way.

And when the arc of progress seems slow, remember: America is not the project of any one person. The single most powerful word in our democracy is the word ‘We.’ 'We the People.’ 'We shall overcome.’

Yes, we can.

And if you’d like to stay connected, you can sign up here to keeping getting updates from me.

President Barack Obama 

things i wish i’d known in my first year of university

I’m reaching the end of my time at university and it’s got me all sentimental. and regretful. There are a number of things that I had learned during my time at university that I wish I’d known during first year. 

  • Read everything. The only valid excuse for not reading everything on the reading list is that you didn’t have time, not that you found it boring, or that it wasn’t useful. Because there’s nothing scarier than trying to write an essay on something you studied a month ago, and you have no notes on the topic. 
  • Revise constantly. I wish I’d revisited everything I did a week after I did it, just as a recap. I tended to focus on what I was doing in the moment because it felt the most important thing at the time. Well, during exams, everything is equal. And it’s so frustrating not quite being able to remember something. So, revise. Even just for ten minutes.
  • Don’t spend all of your money on impulse. I’ve bought so much rubbish that I really don’t need. And if I’d saved that money, I could have gone on holiday. Save every last penny you can. 
  • Eat well. I just said that you should save all the money you can, but I think that food is one exception to that rule. Try and save money where you can, obviously, but don’t go for days and days without fresh vegetables because you’re saving money for a holiday. Your mind, as well as your body, needs food.
  • Go and talk to professors in their student hours. I used to find this so awkward. To be honest, I still do. But if you’re going sending them an email and asking for clarification on a topic, consider maybe popping into their office when it’s open to students. And tell them if you’re struggling! If you don’t let them know, then they can’t help you.
  • Take hot drinks with you, to your lectures or to the library. Don’t spend all your money in the library cafe. Bring a flask of tea, and loads of study snacks in a packed lunch box. Trust me on this.
  • Make time to meet up with friends you haven’t seen in ages. Don’t wait for them to ask you. I make sure to socialise with my friends at least twice a week. And by socialise, I don’t mean getting blind drunk and going clubbing. Sit down and have lunch together. Chat. Get to know each other properly. Friendships formed over alcohol never last as long as friendships formed through actual conversation.
  • Do stuff that the university puts on for students. Join societies. Get involved. One of the best nights I ever had at university was a masquerade ball that my college put on. And for some reason, I’ve never done anything like that since then? And I don’t understand why! University is for making memories, and I don’t really have many!
  • Travel around your university town. If you’re university is on a campus, don’t let your life revolve around that one place. If you’ve travelled away from home to go to university, then make it worth your while! See the sights, be a tourist, get on a bus and go to a random town and buy ice cream. 
  • Experiment. This is the time. Dye your hair blue, join a weird and random society and take up a hobby you’d never dreamed of.  If you want to try drugs, make sure it’s a safe environment and do your research before hand. If you don’t want to do that kind of thing, then don’t judge other people for doing so.
  • Give yourself a day off per week. When you’re at university and you’ve got loads of work, it’s tempting to just work constantly - or at least, to work every day, if not all the time. But it’s so much better for your mental state to take a day off to just relax. 
  • Keep up with your chores. When you’re stressed about an assignment, you don’t want to be also stressed about that pile of washing up accumulating by the sink. Keep your room tidy too - clear space, clear mind.
  • Be kind to everyone. You’re going to meet a lot of people at university, some you’re going to hit it off with immediately. But there will be some who really rub you up the wrong way. Don’t worry about it, it’s completely fine to not like someone. But don’t be mean to them. This isn’t high school, you’re all here to learn and there’s just no need to make them feel bad about themselves. It’s just petty and childish.
  • Think about the future. I know that you’re completely wrapped up in your university life right now, but you’re going to have to venture out into the real world at some point. Do things that might help your future career: volunteer, get a job, join a sports club, make connections. University isn’t, sadly, forever.

There you have it! The advice that I would have given myself in the first year of university. Whether you’re just about to start university, or whether you’re just about to leave, I hope this is useful to you.

As a former member of Congress representing New York’s 3rd congressional district, I want to chime in. I’ve seen activism from both ends — as an ordinary citizen and an elected official — and I’ve seen what works and specific actions we can all take that will truly resonate.

1. Show up

I recently recorded a video for Mic about the most effective action you can take to influence your lawmakers. To sum it up: In 2010, we saw the Tea Party quickly rise to power across the country as the Affordable Car Act was being considered. I remember some of my colleagues in Congress reporting back to me that they had held town halls, which usually attracted maybe 20 constituents, and walked into rooms filled with hundreds or even thousands of people. I saw for myself when I held a town hall on Obamacare and had to answer to hundreds of constituents asking me questions about the legislation.

You may not agree with their politics, but the Tea Party was effective in getting members of Congress to answer their questions and consider their opinions.

My call to you: Show up to events that your local congressperson or senator (on both the state and federal level) are hosting. Don’t know how to find that information? Call 202-224-3121 and asked to be connected to your member of Congress or senator. Ask them when their next public event is. Then show up and ask them why they voted a certain way, voice your support if you agree with what they’re doing, tell them why you disagree if you don’t agree with how they voted.

2. Join a civic organization

Yes, I likely have many years on you. I remember a time when there was no such thing as a home computer, never mind the internet. We are so much more powerful these days. We have access to an incredible amount of knowledge and can be part of networks without even leaving our couch. But, this is also a disadvantage. We don’t talk to each other face to face, and we hide behind a screen that allows us to retreat into our corners.

My call to you: Join an organization. Maybe it’s a church, synagogue or mosque. Maybe it’s a volunteer group. Maybe it’s a political organization or maybe it’s simply a book club. Talk to new people. Get to know what scares them and what motivates them. Don’t let the bullying and name calling that dominates public discourse detract from your own humanity. We need more opportunities to connect with each other in our increasingly polarized country.

3. Learn about how the government works

According to an Annenberg Public Policy survey done in 2015, only 31% of Americans can name all three branches of our government. There’s hardly a statistic that scares me more. We can do all the yelling and opining we want, but if we don’t understand how our government works, how can we expect to affect any positive change? Imagine an electrician showing up to your house who doesn’t know how the wiring works.

My call to you: Educate yourself! Re-read our Constitution, understand what it is our Founding Fathers were creating, know which branch controls which function of government. Read books like George Orwell’s 1984 or Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451 to understand the warnings they share. We are all affected by government and laws at every level in our daily lives (Did you drive on roads today? See a law enforcement officer patrolling?). It’s imperative we understand its inner workings.

4. Devote half an hour every day to reading diverse sources of news

I get it. Reading news can be hard these days. In fact, it seems hard to separate fact from fiction. But Thomas Jefferson was right when he said, “An informed citizenry is at the heart of a dynamic democracy.” We cannot expect to hold the president and Congress accountable if we don’t know what they’re doing.

My call to you: Read the news. Devote a half an hour a day. Diversify your sources, but stick to real journalism. Avoid overly partisan rants on both sides.  Get the facts. Support our journalists — their jobs are more important than ever.

5. Vote!

This is a no-judgement zone, but I must ask: Did you vote this past November? Only 55% of Americans did. And that number gets even lower when we look at years in which there’s no presidential election. In 2014, only 36.4% of Americans took the time to make their voices heard. And we’re worse off because of it. Even though we only vote for a president every four years, we vote for state and local officials, congressmen and women and maybe your senator or governor on other years. Make sure you’re voting whenever there’s an election. All elections matter.

My call to you: In 2018, there will be a midterm election. Every member of Congress will be up for reelection, as well as many senators. Make sure you vote. Make sure your voice is heard. There’s nothing more important you can do as a citizen.

— Former Congressman Steve Israel, Read more

Grounding

WHAT IS GROUNDING?

Grounding is a set of simple strategies to  detach from emotional pain for example (cravings, self harm urges, emotional eating behaviour etc.) Grounding can also be a way of returning your attention to the outside world and away from yourself. In the case of dissociation.

WHY PRACTICE GROUNDING TECHNIQUES?

When you are overwhelmed with emotional pain, you need a way to detach so that you can gain control over your feelings and stay safe. As long as you are grounding, you are more likely to be able to overcome urges. Grounding ‘anchors’ you to reality.

Many people with PTSD and dissociative disorders struggle with either feeling too much (overwhelming emotions and memories) or too little (numbing and dissociation). In grounding, you attain balance between the two—conscious of reality and ability to tolerate it.

GUIDELINES:

§ Grounding can be done any time, anywhere and no one has to know.

·       §  Use grounding when you are: faced with a trigger, having a flashback or dissociating.

·       §  Keep your eyes open, look around the room, and make sure the light is good to stay in touch with the present.

·       §  Rate your mood before and after to test whether it worked. Before grounding, rate your level of

·       §  emotional pain, or your level of dissociation. Then re-rate it afterwards. Has it gone down?

·       Try not to make judgements or think negatively. The idea is to distract from the negatives.

·       §  Stay neutral—no judgments of good or bad.

·       §  Focus on the present, not the past or future.

·       §  Grounding is much more active than relaxation exercises and focuses your attention.

Grounding is deemed to be a better way of coping with PTSD and dissociative disorders than relaxation practice. As during relaxation the focus is too much within the body, which at the worst may bring on flashbacks.

WAYS TO GROUND

MENTAL GROUNDING

o    Describe to yourself in detail your surroundings: For example “The walls are white, there are three pink chairs and a blue sofa. There is a picture of a brown border collie on the wall with a gold frame around it.” You can do this out loud if appropriate, or in your head if you are in public.

o    Play a game like “Scattergories” in your head or with a friend or family member. Choose a letter of the alphabet and try and come up with as many examples of a category you choose as you can. For example C … Boys names: Christopher, Curtis, Carl, Charles etc.

o    Do an age progression. IThis can be particularly useful if you have dissociated or regressed to a younger alter or state. For example in my experiences I have an alter who is three. So I might say… Now I am four, I am at home with Mummy and Daddy and I can do (an example of an age appropriate activity) alone. Work your way up until you are back to your current age. This may not always work for little alters, but can help.

o    Describe an everyday activity in great detail. For example if you like gardening “I open the shed door and pull out the lawn mower, I connect it to a power supply and climb on. I turn the key and put it into drive….”

o    Imagine. For example make up a nice little story in your head, or out loud. “I am putting some roller skates on, and I am slowly gliding away from all my emotional suffering down a beautiful smooth lane, having fun listening to my favourite music LOUD!”

o    Say a safety statement. ‘My name is _________; I am safe right now. I am in the present, not the past. I am in _____________ the date is _____________.

·        Read something, saying each word to yourself. Or read each letter backwards so that you focus or the letters and not on the meaning of words.

·        Use humour: For example have a “Funny Memory Bank” where you store up your favourite witty moments for those detached, rainy days.  

·        Count to 100 or say the alphabet very slowly or very fast.

·        Repeat something meaningful to yourself, such as a prayer or quote. For example you could use the Serenity Prayer.

PHYSICAL GROUNDING

û Run cool or warm water over your hands.

û  Grab tightly onto your chair as hard as you can.

·       û  Touch various objects around you: a pen. keys, your clothing, the table, the walls. Pay close attention to colours, weights, textures etc.

·       û  Firmly stamp your feet on the floor, literally grounding yourself. Feel the tension of your feet against the pressure of the floor.

·       û  Carry a ground object in your pocket—a small object such as a rock, stone, crystal, bead, piece of string or cloth, or a stress ball that you can touch whenever you feel triggered.

·       û  Jump up and down.

·       û  Stretch reach upwards and pull yourself tall. Extend your arms, legs, fingers and toes.

·       û  Walk slowly, noticing each footstep.

·       û  Eat something yummy. Notice the flavours, textures and feelings that come up for you.

SOOTHING GROUNDING

·        Use Cheerleading statements, as if you were talking to a small child. For example “You are having a difficult time adjusting to these chanes, but you are doing so well. You should be proud of yourself.”

·        Think of favorites. Think of your favorite color, animal, season, food, time of day, TV show.

·        Picture people you care about. Even get a photobook made of positive pictures or pictures of people you love! Such a simple nice way to ground, and you can get A4 photo books at the moment from GroupOn for under £7!! (I in no way endorse them I just thought it was a good offer!)

·        Remember the words to an inspiring song, quotation or poem that you like or feel positively about. Maybe write out the words and decorate it for your wall.

·        Remember a safe place. Describe a place that you find very soothing it could be when you went on holiday to the beach, or walking in the woods. Or just a time you felt safe and peaceful at home in your living room or in bed.

·        Plan out a safe treat for yourself, such as a trip to a coffee shop with a friend, making a nice dinner or a bath with some nice toiletries or candles if you feel safe to use them

·        Think of things you are looking forward to in the next week. Perhaps schedule your time so you build some structure for chores and pleasurable activities. It can help to know what you are doing and also not just sit at home with nothing to do. This can cause difficulties.

WHAT IF GROUNDING DOESN’T WORK?

Practice as often as possible. Even when you don’t feel overwhelmed or dissociative. This way it will come more naturally to you when you are struggling.

Practice faster. Speeding up the pace gets you focused on the outside world quickly.
Try grounding for a Ioooong time 20 mins at least, and then repeat !!
Try to notice whether you do better with physical or mental or soothing grounding.

Create your own methods of grounding. Any method you make up may be worth much more than those you read here because it is yours.

Start grounding early in a negative mood cycle. Start when you begin to feel the early warning signs of dissociation or when you have just started having a flashback.

7

Much of the world watched as the events in Standing Rock, ND unfolded. Many posted in protest of the pipeline drilled through sacred treaty protected land belonging to the Natives, some even gave their physical presence to the cause, subjecting themselves to the frigid cold, mistreatment from police officers; tear gas, rubber bullets, and imprisonment. One beautiful thing about Standing Rock was the community there, if dapl had a bright side, it’s that it brought more like-minded people together to connect over a common cause. I met a guy on my flight to ND who had actually been adopted into a Lakota family, Standing Rock gave him more than just friends, he felt at home on the reservation like he never had before. When I first arrived, it was the beginning of the end of this community. There seemed to be this confusion combined with sadness, many seemed to have found a home at Standing Rock like my friend Jahnny, but what now? Regardless of it being the end of the line for many here, I was still invited in without hesitation, given food and drink, asked my purpose for coming to Standing Rock. Everyone that showed up here, had a reason for being here, and everyone took care of everyone. At one point during the evacuation, I was running from police over Lake Oahe, I fell through ice and got completely drenched head to toe in ice cold water. In a state of shock, not fully realizing the urgency of my situation, someone grabbed me and said, “we need to get you to the med tent, NOW!” A few people stripped off my clothes, gave me a space blanket and threw me on a quad that sped me to a warm tent where I was given tea and warm clothes. I felt safe and a part of this family just for showing up and standing up for what I believed was right. 

YOI Fan Rec Friday

Hi! Thanks for all your recs! A few things to mention this week:

1. I randomly select 20-25 fics to put on this list each week to keep the list manageable! If you don’t see your rec on here, please send it in again! Tumblr also eats asks, so please send in your rec again if you don’t see it!
2. Please look at my guidelines before recommending fics! I will not put fics on the list that violate my guidelines. This is to keep my blog a safe place for anyone and everyone! You can check out my guidelines here.

Without further ado, here are the recommendations this week!

Rec’d by @sacchariwrites :
I Want It All by venoms, Teen, 5k (WIP)
When Katsuki Yuuri misses the podium by half a point and finds himself in fourth place during the 2015 Grand Prix Final, he is ready to give up, but Yakov Feltsman sees something in him and offers to coach him the following season in Russia alongside his idol, Viktor Nikiforov and Yuri Plisetsky, whose next season is his senior debut.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Whenever I Fall at Your Feet by thesleepingsatellite, Explicit, 4.8k
Victor would have been lying if he’d said he didn’t find feet erotic. Feet were the primary tools of his and Yuuri’s profession, the instruments they used to dance across the ice, the supporting foundation of their performances. They were simultaneously punished and treasured. Finally, Yuuri was allowing him to cherish his feet the way that Victor had wanted to for months.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous and anonymous:
if this city will bloom by RennieOnIceCream (Hitsugi_Zirkus), Gen, 8.9k
The story where Viktor accidentally brings home a cherry blossom spirit from Japan, and his life and heart are turned upside-down.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @mixberkaan :
The Rules For Lovers by ADreamingSongbird, Teen, 128k (WIP)
Prince Yuuri Katsuki has a duty to his country, above all else (his desires, his dreams, and his happiness included), and he knows this alliance will help to ensure the safety of his people. That’s the only reason he accepts Prince Nikiforov’s hand in marriage. The pleasant surprise, of course, is the part where they fall in love along the way. The unpleasant one, well…That’s a long story.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous and anonymous:
Love and Gelato by flowercrownyuri (elevensong), Teen, 7.6k
Victor’s life consists of three things: taking classes at the local university, figure skating on the weekends, and working at a florist shop downtown. After years upon years of monotony, he’s convinced that nothing can take him by surprise anymore. However, when a new employee begins working at Celestino’s, a gelato shop across the road, Victor’s immediately intrigued. 

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Just Hold On (We’re Going Home) by kiaronna, Teen, 10k (WIP)
Where Yuuri remembers the banquet, Viktor forgets, and Yakov Feltsman has his own plans.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous and anonymous:
A Political Affair by ChibiFoxx, Mature, 85k (WIP)
As a young Omega, Yuuri had wanted nothing more than to be able to live freely and pursue his dreams. But with the crushing reality of having an Alpha-dominated government, Omegas were forced to live the life society wanted them to have, even if it meant selling their lives to an Alpha suitor at a young age.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
I can be your devil or your angel, baby by hinatella, Teen, 5.1k
Yuuri Katsuki didn’t ask for any of this, and he’s starting to question all of his life choices that lead up to this cursed moment.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
do something pretty (while you can) by renaissance, Teen, 14k (WIP)
Everything is going wrong, and it’s all Viktor’s fault. It all started when he got Christophe involved. That was a mistake. But no, it started before then. It started with Georgi and Anya. Even earlier, it started with one small victory that gave Viktor a lot of big ideas. It started when Lilia arrived with her ballet students on the very first day of term. Really, if Viktor’s being honest, it started the moment he met Yuuri.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
you think my bruised knees are sort of pretty by fireblazie, Teen, 4.7k (WIP)
In which Yuuri gets drunk at a con, earns the nickname Cake Boy, and promptly forgets all about it.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @sentwithcitation :
The Boy Who Watched by Rosie_Rues, Teen, 12k
In which Victor pines, everybody drinks too much, and Yakov deserves a sainthood for putting up with these idiots. Basically, it’s a decade’s worth of near misses, misunderstandings, and pure obliviousness.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
you are the best thing that’s ever been mine by JMonCheri, Mature, 4.9k (WIP)
Wherein famous actors Yuuri Katsuki and Viktor Nikiforov are forced to fake a relationship for mere reasons such as fame, money, and for teenage girls to make thesis long rants about them on Tumblr. A pact is made, then things snowball into a complete mess, and ya’ll already get the idea where this is going…

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @dragondoodle0268 :
Painting by Homosexualrussian, TwinDragons0268, Teen, 1.3k (WIP)
After Victor Nikiforov settles into his comfy new Barcelona apartment while taking a break from skating, he goes to many new places, he experiences many new experiences. However, out of all of them, his favorite hang-outs is the art gallery near his residence (as he goes nearly every day). Everyone there knows him by name, he knows each painting, sculpture, collage by heart, but after an overly angry guest leaves, Victor slowly begins to discover that change can be for the better.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
will lose my desire for you (never my love) by ken_ichijouji (dommific), Mature, 16k ***Major Character Death
Victor is ten when he leaves home to fine tune his alchemy, nineteen when he meets Katsuki Yuuri, twenty when he becomes a State Alchemist and a husband, and twenty-two when a teen named Yuri Plisetsky begins to report to him. 

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
That April (you were knowable) by llythl, Teen, 10k (WIP)
“He said there were dead bodies buried beneath the tree,” Victor explains, eyes wide. Yuuri remembers his sister telling him in passing that Victor could not be more typical as a tourist - possessing a charming naivete that was really only charming when it was not doing any harm.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @flyingsuits-blog-blog
You Have Witchcraft in Your Lips by RememberingEmbers, Teen, 4.8k
Victor falls in love with the new cheesecake-on-a-stick vendor at the Renaissance Faire.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Fontaine de jouvence by EdosianOrchid, Teen, 4.7k
Maybe he should have chosen a different place to spend his eternity, calmer and less eccentric than San Junipero but Yuuri has promised himself that he will overcome his anxiety to catch up here all the missed opportunities from his previous life. Besides, it is what his best friend Phichit would have wanted for him.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
more than three quarters by alykapedia, Teen, 9.8k (WIP)
“No fair, I wanted to do a review for your new book too!”
Pulling the phone away from his ear, Yuuri Katsuki—New York Times best-selling author and winner of the Akutagawa and Naoki Prizes—squinted at the screen bearing his best friend’s grinning face. 

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Take Hold by LavenderProse, Mature, 20k
“I believe…” Yuuri says, pensive. “I believe that when you’re connected to another person so closely that you share a soul, it’s stupid to think that you wouldn’t feel it. How can you not recognize part of yourself when they’re standing right in front of you?” / “That's…I…yes.” Viktor tries to untie his tongue, mouth suddenly arid. “You—I think you would know, yes.” / Yuuri skates onto the ice and Viktor’s soul screams after him, Do you know? Can you see me? I’m here, I’m here.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
I’ll be loving you for quite some time by Singittome, Teen, 1.8k
Twenty-eight little stories from Saint Petersburg.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
i never could’ve asked for more by flowerbolt, Explicit, 3.1k (WIP)
It’s like having a genie in a lamp.Or such were the tales on the worn-out books he used to have as a child, anyway. Always containing a wondrous spell he never quite understood—though it seems a little unfair on him to have to give something in return, and inevitably even less fair on his benefactor to not have a wish limit in the first place.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Cherry Wood and Golden Robes by Skowronek, Not Rated, 8k (WIP)
When the up-and coming Japanese wizard Yuuri Katsuki arrives in Sochi for his most important duelling competition so far, he expects to flub his duel, embarrass himself, and panic. He doesn’t expect to exceed his own expectations and gain a rival in the process.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
The Force Is Strong in My Family by explanationintime, Teen, 1.8k
“The force is strong in my family. My father has it, I have it, and…my brother has it.”

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @hystericblue:
Found Myself in a House I’ve Never Been Before by QueenofFennoscandia, Mature, 9.4k (WIP)
Yuuri was almost sure that this was reality. His favorite tea blend could be found in the kitchen cabinet on left, and the teapot was on the top shelf, exactly as he favored. Two important thoughts went through his head. Could he even skate anymore, and more importantly, did any of the people he knew exist?

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Unsinkable by terra_incognita, Teen, 18k (WIP)
Victor is a wealthy heir with a lonely soul. Yuuri is a poor dancer with a tender heart. The deck of the Titanic might be a very romantic place to meet your one true love, but it’s not exactly a fortuitous one.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @exile-wrath :
On Our High Horses by Bad_Wolf, Teen, 11k (WIP)
Sara Crispino loves her job, riding the broad flats and hills of her adopted planet on her beloved horse. She doesn’t have to talk to anyone for days, just the cows and horses she herds. Usually the only other person she interacts with is the landowner of half the planet, Yurui Katsuki, and he’s just plain shy. Sara would have been happy to go on like that, one day flowing into the next, seamless and unvaried; except when a group of uppity nobles decide to invest money into the Katsukis’ business. Now while Yuuri is off schmoozing the money, Sara has to play host to an infuriating rich lady who wouldn’t know hard work if it bit her in the ass.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @nagoyadelay :
Setting Sun by LittleLostStar, Explicit, 52k (WIP)
With the world watching their every move, Victor and Yuuri begin trading lyrics in a secret conversation; from playful rivalry to intense seduction, through Savage Garden and San Fermin, their virtual affair unfolds, hidden in plain sight. But the Grand Prix approaches, bringing with it newfound opportunities for Yuuri’s career, and his new life hinges on two things: winning the gold, and staying away from Victor.


Thank you for all your recs! ₍₍ (̨̡ ‾᷄♡‾᷅ )̧̢ ₎₎

The amazing “YOI Fan Rec Friday” banner was created by @omgkatsudonplease! I love them a lot, check out their blog!

stormy nights || stiles stilinski (smut )

word count: 3550

prompt: my smut for lacrosse week!

warnings: smut, swearing

author’s note: this is my first solo smut and i hope you guys like it! let me know if i should keep writing smut. please leave feedback on this!

masterlist

coming soon

Keep reading

Why Embracing Emotional Distress is the Best Medicine Sometimes

Much of our mental suffering is caused by our overwhelming attempt to avoid it. We think experiencing any sort of anxiety is a threat to our existing, but psychology studies have proven that one learns from struggle. One becomes a better human being through heartache. Let us explain with the science behind this theory..

Keep reading

How to become a good student (again) 3: Yearn for friendship - not worship; not debasement

Hello, fellow ex-good student!

‘tis done! This beast just got longer and longer, so I decided to cut it down a bit for the sake of readability. But let me know if there’s something that was too vague - the nuance might have got lost in the editing process.

Alright, let’s get down to business (to defeat! The Huns!)! So, if you’re an ex-good student, I’m pretty sure that you know this static in your head, right? Whenever you really need to do something but you just can’t get up and do it, so you keep procrastinating even though you hate it and keep scrolling and scrolling or gaming and gaming and feel more and more guilty?

Well, it might not be the most immediate analogy, but for this post I want you to consider that what connects you and your subject of study is essentially a relationship and that this static is (among other things) an indicator of how screwed up your relationship is. Just like with real people, your relationships with subjects can either

  • prosper and bear fruit (me & Creative Writing)
  • become cold and distant (me & French)
  • or, worst of all, turn sour and actively harmful. (me & PE, back in school)

Now, nobody likes to hear that they’re relationship-ing wrong. And it is true that different approaches work for different people. But here are the counter-productive relationships that I’ve personally ended up in and I’m gonna show you how I got into and out of them, so you can try to do the same. Maybe it’ll help you lift that static from your head.

Side-Note: Always remember that, since your subjects are just that (subjects), and not real people, you are the only one who can actually mend these relationships and, conversely, you are the one who screwed them up in the first place (probably with good intentions, though).

So, we’ll take them in this order:

1) Overeager Debasement

2) Undereager Debasement

3) Worship


(Oh, and in case you wanna catch up:

Masterpost 

Part 1

Part 2)


1) Overeager Debasement

What is it?

The desire to do everything, perfectly, at the same time, right now. Not to limit yourself to just one field of study, but to master them all, to reign supreme above knowledge, to keep your mind wide open to new possibilities, similarities and contradictions.
You overvalue your own capacities and undervalue the needs and difficulties of your subject.
(also refer to the first post for this)

How did you get here?

(read picture from right to left)

So. Many. Possible. Reasons.

  • it’s a cage. The idea of doing just one thing for the rest of your life scares you and you feel imprisoned at the thought of it
  • you know that you could be outstanding if you applied yourself
  • you know that you could be even more outstanding if you became accomplished in multiple fields
  • you want to find connections between fields nobody’s ever considered before
  • you feel like you’ve wasted your last few years and need to catch up to others
  • you’re afraid that you’re not good enough
  • you’re afraid of being ignorant
  • you’re arrogant

No matter the reason (I’ve gone through them all), people caught in this state of mind shovel more and more onto their plate.
And then wonder why they can’t swallow it all.

What do you think you’re doing?

A labour of love, most likely. You think you love languages and sciences and athletics and programming and cooking and hanging out with friends and being alone and so you just want to do it all!
You don’t want to limit yourself! You don’t want to lose any time! But there’s just so much and you have so little energy and ugh, if only I wasn’t destined for greatness, then I could relax like other little people, but no, I need to keep pushing! In every! Direction! At the same! Time!

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend who gets up at 6am, watches the sun rise, does yoga, eats a healthy breakfast, goes for a quick run, comes back home, answers all correspondence, is artistic for a few hours, then scientific for a few hours, then social for a few hours and ends the day with tiny masterpieces in each area, goes out with friends or family to grab a healthy dinner and goes to sleep, happy and balanced :)

Well, you know what, my starry-eyed friend?

What are you actually doing?

You’re the mental equivalent of a social butterfly.
You’re being fucking disrespectful.

You’re always on the run and never able to really commit to anything, because you’ve already scheduled something else afterwards. You’re shallow, deluded, that one friend that always comes in running, screaming “Besties  ~ ♥” and everyone shifts uncomfortably in their seats and smiles a painful smile and humours you, because they know you mean well, but they also know that you know nothing about them. 
You’ve never been there for them ever, but always expect them to be there for you. Whenever they want to talk about themselves, you nod and then proceed to about yourself and your plans and “ohmygosh, this is so nice, we need to meet more often ~ ♥ “. But at least you mean well, so they’ve agreed to keep it simple and on the “The weather is nice today”-level with you. 

But here you are, wondering why you’re not making any progress.
Mysterious.

So what do I do?

Well, you need to go from this:

To this:

How? More on that below.


2) Undereager Debasement

What is it?

This stage is what happens when you notice that your lofty ideals from Overeager Debasement cannot be fulfilled. You turn bitter, hateful, cold. You think you’re a failure, you think you were too soft. Instead of wanting to be friends with everyone, you now want to rule over everyone, fuck what they want.

You’re burnt out. You’re done. You just want to get through these stupid classes and catch a goddamn break, goddamnit.

And you WILL get through. You’re too proud to do anything else. But you don’t really care about any of it.
You just want to make it.

How did you get here?

If you were a good student, you probably heard at some point or another that you were “different” and that your complex and mysterious ways were not understandable and definitely not achievable for your average classmate.

Most people who tell you this mean well. A few want to make fun of you, but most actually do mean it as a compliment. But they don’t know how dangerous it is to hear it again and again, because regardless of whether it’s true or not, you start to believe it.
You start to believe that somehow, you have a higher calling, a higher standard. And you start to long for that day when your high standards will be met - when you will go to that one mysterious class where everyone is just as eager as you are, where the “Oh, captain, my captain!”-teacher will spark a fire in your brain that will never go out and when your ominous “gifts” can finally be put to good use for the prosperous future of mankind.


And you work.

And work.

And the class never comes.

You feel the weight on your shoulders when teachers talk of “high expectations”, you feel it crush you a little bit every time your friends tease you about your genuine fear that you might not get an A, that you might lose it all, that your “gifts” could disappear and you’ll be stranded and useless and you put in the hours, you work your ass off to keep that high standard, all in the hope of having that one miraculous class that never comes.

I realized that that class would never come when I entered university.

University, I’d told myself, would be my Arcadia, my Eden, my academic paradise where all my hard work would be rewarded!
Instead, I only found more drudgery, more incompetent professors, more disinterested students and even more bureacracy. To say that I was “disappointed” would be putting it very lightly.

I became disoriented and disenchanted. I realized that I could get through most classes with half-assed effort, I was hardly ever challenged, I floated along and hated every second of it. I blamed my boring teachers, the imperfect system, the teachers who had given me hope only for me to watch it crash and go up in flames.

What do you think you’re doing?

Being badass, cool and detached, most likely.

You dream of yourself as a master and your subjects as slaves. They bow to your will, they dance to your tune, you command them with the snap of a finger.

“Look, you slave of the system”, you say, lying on a velvet sofa, “Look, at how it hardly takes any effort for me to pass these classes! Look at how I spend my time doing things I actually like and that are actually worth it, unlike these stupidly easy classes taught by stupidly incompetent professors in a stupidly screwed-up system! Look at me, being edgy and drowning in self-hatred because I can physically feel myself gliding off the rails that made me so “special” and becoming one of the average people in the masses, haha. Ha. Ha. Screw academia, but still give me good grades, amirite?”

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend that never studies for classes, comes for three lectures per semester and still manages to get perfect grades because everything you do in school is, like, so five years ago. That one friend who has read all the classics in their spare time, has conquered and enslaved all the knowledge actually worth knowing, will quote obscure Polish philosophers you’ve never heard of and plays the piano with a perfect pitch. They’re the wisest, most culture-non-conforming people you know - they’ve been up until 5am, wandering the streets and drinking vodka from a bottle while forcefully pentrating the mysteries of the universe all by themselves until they finally fall asleep on a park bench and awake with an epiphany about Klein bottles.
They’re “special”.

What are you actually doing?

Caring more about appearing “special” than actually trying to be “special”, that’s what you’re doing.

But, look, what made you so “special” and “different” in the first place was not a “calling” or “gifts” or the fact that you wrote good grades and were destined for greatness.

Here’s a handy chart I’ll use later - you were lucky enough to fall into the green zone, lucky enough to be born with an innate respect and a love for learning. That’s what made you “special”. That’s what made you succeed. Not pressure, not warped ideals and certainly not the fear of failure.


But somewhere along the way you forgot that and only focussed on the results. You started to believe yourself to be so special that everybody else should cater to you.
The fancy titles, the awe-struck looks, the “You’re so amazing”s and the “The genius of a decade”, the planned Nobel prize speech and the prestige, the dream others had lovingly created for you and you had slowly absorbed and warped as your own? It got to you. Hell, it got to me.
And it became more important than learning itself.
Somewhere along the way, you and I, we became an arrogant and lazy assholes.

You looked down on your easy courses and homework and instead of recognising how lucky you are, doing it in a minute and a half and then putting in the extra work on top to dig deeper and to maybe contribute something of value and fun, you threw it aside with a snide remark as beneath you.
Of course it wasn’t fun. Of course it wasn’t challenging. You never even tried to make it either.

(And don’t get me wrong: I honestly do think that the education system as it is right now needs MAJOR reforms. But right now? It is what it is. And instead of making the best of it and doing what you once loved so much, you succumbed to societal pressures you found yourself unable to fulfill and said “meh”.
You cared so much about the fame and the title that the relationship itself didn’t matter.)

But this isn’t the master-slave relationship you imagine it to be.
It’s a trophy-friendship. Once upon a time, you got on really well with this person and other people loved your friendship. You fell in love with the ideal, with their connections, their money, their prestige, their name on a CV, and you stuck around just for that.
You valiantly ignore the reality of the state of things between you two
and take them out only when absolutely needed, only when things are this close to falling apart and so you keep walking a fine, fine line.
Whenever a deadline approaches, you shower them with attention and love and, gingerly, they open up to you and you see a depth and complexity to them that astounds you and makes you think “Imagine! Imagine how much more I could have seen if only I’d started earlier?”
But the moment the crisis has passed, you toss them aside once again.

Because this is enough to make your name.
You may not remember much about these nights or about the person at all, but the only thing that counts is that it will fulfill your “special” prophecy and make you a legend, right?

Well, always remember this:
(read picture from right to left)

You’re not “special” if you made it to university. You’re not “special” if you’ve made your name. 
It comes down to a simple choice: do you value appearances over integrity or the other way round? Do you dare to look like a fumbling idiot again when you start something new? Is the “appearing like an idiot”-part more important to you than the “learning/creating something new”-part? 
Have a think about it.

3) Worship

“Alright”, you’ll say, “Alright. I get it. So I’ll treat my “friends”/subjects with respect and integrity and I’ll take all the time and concentration I can bestow upon them, just as I would upon real friends. But do you want me to be like, uh - like…

What is it?

“…like one of those anime characters that lives only for their dream and gets up at like 6am, does the thing, talks about the thing, breathes the thing, goes to bed, dreams of the thing and then wakes up at 6am to do the thing?”

(Google: Did you mean Hinata Shouyou?

Yes, yes, I did, google.)

Well, no, I don’t want you to do that. See, that’s the other extreme and unless you’re an anime character, chances are that it won’t work out for you. 

How did you get here?

Personally, I was caught in this trap for a loooooong time. Anime offered me a new way of relating to my passions that neither my family nor my school had ever shown me: unabashed obsession.
I wanted to be perfect. I wanted to be obsessed. I wanted to give myself up to a higher ideal, something above human consciousness, something that would endure. I wanted to, well, get up at 6am, do the thing, talk about the thing, breathe the thing and so on - “the thing” in question being, of course, studying. I made elaborate plans, complicated lists, study-plans that shift on a daily basis and cover all grounds, I wanted to study for two hours before school, wanted to repeat lessons, wanted to give myself up to knowledge, made cool covers for my notebooks, made mock exams for my friends to use, planned to focus on each continent for a month and study it, planned to listen to one new composer each day, planned to go to the museum every week, planned to analyze Sherlock Holmes and think just like him, planned to - you get the idea.

I wanted to be like this:

What do you think you’re doing?

Being but a humble servant to the eternal workings of truth. Knowing thou art unworthy, yet suffering the perfection of study.

I wanted to go from 0 to 100, I wanted knowledge and wisdom to transform and deliver me, I wanted to feel enlightened, I wanted to feel my brain burning, pushing frontiers and breaking through to new horizons, I wanted to elevate myself to touch even the lowest levels of truth.
I wanted to do something noble, something worthwhile, something that could never be critisized and would always be valued, something with eternal meaning that would echo through the ages and I wanted to be even the tiniest cog in the machinery of mind.

What are you actually doing?

Being, quite simply, an idiot.

This is one of my favourite quotes (David Wong):

“There are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.” 

The same goes for studying. As shown above, studying won’t work out if you do not treat your subjects with respect. Conversely, studying also won’t work if you continue to idolize it as work beyond all work and reproach, as the only true calling, as the realm of the genii and by self-flagellating yourself and repeating “I’m but a humble servant in your kingdom of reason and will never reach where you are, but will spend all my time trying to reach you.” 

Why? Because by saying “I’ll never reach you or be worthy of you”, you’ve already sealed your fate. Some students (no matter how well they actually perform) are stuck thinking that they are stupid and incapable of doing well. Others think that the trick is in the preparation and they undergo complicated rituals of finding exactly the right study spot, exactly the right study drink, exactly the right study time, etc. in the hope of channeling the connection between their godly subject and themselves, but it never turns out quite as glamorous as they’d hoped (once again, speaking from experience).

This is because you cannot force a true friendship if you think yourself unworthy of it. It will always be worship. 

And why are you worshipping?
Because it takes the pressure right off of you
. This always annoyed me about some of my fellow students. They treated becoming a good student as this miraculous and unlikely event that only happens to the #blessed.
I insisted that “no”, it could be done. “Yes”, it was hard work, but ultimately absolutely doable. But now that I’ve been in their shoes? I understand.
Admitting that you could have done it anytime implies failure on your part for not having done it. By saying “Oh no, it is so very complex and divine and a lowly worm like me could never hope to crawl in its shadows”, you shift the focus away from yourself and onto the thing itself. 

But this is a synthetic, manufactured relationship with a partner that does not even exist. It is, at its heart, a kyaa  ~ I hope senpai notices me! (๑♡⌓♡๑) - kind of relationship. It’s idolizing not a person’s true character, but their appearance, their aesthetic and the values that they represent for you. It’s not really listening to what they’re saying, but warping their words so they fit into your perfect idea of them.
Just, unlike with undereage debasement, you do not play pretend that everything’s fine and secretly hate the other person deep down - you honestly idolize them to heaven and back, so you could never possible reach them.
You’re using them to fill in the holes in your own personality.

And that … just isn’t fun? I dunno about you, but treating studying as something that must be done perfectly with exactly the right pen and the perfect face-mask after the right smoothie and in the right lighting by a window overgrown with ivy and with perfect concentration from the first moment and unwavering, knightly passion and exact planning from 6am to bedtime all because I know deep down that I will not be able to fulfill these ideals and thus don’t have to feel bad about not reaching them just … isn’t for me. I don’t like my relationships to be all overstructured and “perfect” and high maintenance like that.

I want my friendships and my studying to be authentic. And that means that sometimes it’s messy and sometimes it’s hard and sometimes it’s quoting Keats while lying on the floor at 2am in the morning and chugging milk out of a carton, but it’s real.
I truly do understand this longing to make studying look pretty and like a magical realm, because when you’re in the flow that’s really what it feels like. But the beauty comes along with the practice, not the other way round.

No, but honestly - what do I DO then?


Y’remember Hippogriffs from Harry Potter? That’s how I imagine my subjects. Approach them carefully, honestly, maintaining eye contact and as equals and they will respect you. This scene:

This scene is what I’m talking about. 
If you were in a worship-state, you would only admire them from afar, gushing over how beautiful they are, but sad that they would never deign to even look in your general direction. (think of all the subjects you thought would be way too difficult for you)
If you were in a debasement-state, you’d either try to make friends with all the hippogriffs, hopping from one to the other and forming no bond with either or you’d “tsk” disdainfully and try to force them to obey you against their will. (*cough* Malfoy *cough*)

If, however, you’re in the green, there will be mutual respect between you and you will be able to fly.

So what does it mean to be in the green? 
It means not to do any of the above, obviously, so 

  • take your time for and invest brainpower into each and every one of your subjects - be a good friend. Be there. Listen. Even if they have crazy ideas at 4am in the morning. 
  • appreciate your subjects and know that they are more than the teacher who tries to get you to know them. Sometimes, some people just have a really shitty PR department (especially maths)
  • don’t think too much or too little of yourself. You can do amazing things, but that does not give you the license not to do amazing things anymore, rest on your laurels and expect others to applaud you for it. 

  • some relationships take longer than others to build, but getting to understand someone who puzzled you from the first moment and challenged your beliefs will improve your own personality as well
    (side-eye at PE. Yes, I love you now, you crazy athletic bastard)
  • do it for the sake of the relationship itself, because you enjoy their company. Results are presents which, although very much appreciated, should not be the main motivator to keep you going.
    This essentially means that you should think of studying as hanging out with a friend - already makes it seem so much more inviting and way less daunting, does it not?

    (Logic and I, being saltmates. Real friends judge other people together)
  • be aware that all friendships go through rocky patches and some subjects might take a while to warm up to you or you to them. But if you think that it’s worth it, then you gotta power through that. If you don’t think it’s worth it, you gotta be brave enough to say good-bye. 


Look, what I’m actually saying is … be Souma Yukihira from Food Wars.

Food Wars is a crazy and at times pretty pervy manga/anime, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t also one of the best pieces of fiction I’ve ever consumed and if Souma isn’t one of the most admirable main characters I’ve ever encountered.  

The relationship between him and cooking is filled with trust, love and equality. He trusts his cooking skills, because he knows that they have spent a long time together - cooking won’t let him down and he won’t ever let cooking down by stopping to look for ways to improve.

That doesn’t mean, however, that he’s always deadly serious - he loves to play around with cooking and to try ridiculous new things. He never forgets the joy that even the simplest form of cooking brings him. 

There’s one great episode where he puts his life as a chef on the line and someone fearfully asks him what he’d do if he lost. He shrugs and says he could become a lawyer or a teacher or something. So while he loves cooking profoundly, he does not worship it and he knows that there are other relationships he could build up if he had to. He just …doesn’t want to, because cooking is his bff. 

He loves to take on challenges to see how far he and cooking have come -

- and he takes challenges very seriously -


- but takes it even more seriously if he loses -

- and nonetheless knows that they are stronger for the challenges they have faced together. 

So, yes, this is what it means to be in the green. Cherish your friendships, hang out together, be honest, funny, clever, curious and you. 

You’ll be surprised at how much fun the two of you will have, now that all the pretensions and pressures are gone. 

Just …hang out and have fun.

(and maybe watch Food Wars!, because damn, Souma is the MVP of my inspirational heroes)

Have a great day and I’ll see you in the next (and hopefully shorter) part 4 :)

Talks Machina Highlights (Episodes 92 & 93)
  • Denise message: “With every breath the world takes my power increases.”
  • Asked which of her episodes was the most intense, Noelle: “Well, the first one, I was on the edge of my seat a lot wondering when they were gonna stop shopping…”
  • Everyone admits that episode 93 should’ve been the most intense episode yet, but they were all so ignorant of the potential consequences that it didn’t really sink in until afterwards.
  • Noelle talks about a really fun D&D campaign she had where everybody played teenagers in high school (she was a tiefling warlock). She wanted something different than the high-charisma, low-strength build she’d had there, so when Matt suggested the blood hunter class, she was 100% on board. “I like my D&D characters extra.”
  • Sam agrees with a question-asker that Taryon is mostly just emulating what he thinks brave people ought to do; it remains to be seen whether or not he’s actually brave.
  • Liam as a player was freaking out over how close the campaign came to ending, but in-character, Vax is pretty convinced they’re all destined to get to the end of the road at this point and that there’s a bigger plan in play.
  • Travis and Sam both expected the Nine Hells to be worse than they were. Sam: “I think you build up hell in your mind…”
  • Tova would totally have turned Grog into a werebear if he’d asked.
  • A question-asker points out that Trinket wound up lasting years longer than Doty. Sam: “…yes, there’s something inherently wrong with that. […] You know what? Matt’s game is broken.” Brian: “Doty vs. Trinket: The end of Critical Role.” (Laura immediately tweets in outrage.)
  • Someone asks if Vax was disappointed that he didn’t get the killing blow on Hotis, and Liam points out that the only kill that had any emotional meaning for Vax personally was Thordak–other than that, it’s all about the team.
  • At one point, Tova was down to 15 HP. Travis: “We’re not very good at tracking how low everybody gets.” Noelle: “…no. No, you’re not.”
  • Sam, summing up an extended D&D legal discussion: “I’m not sure that contract would’ve been legal in the state of California.”
  • Losing Doty hasn’t sunk in yet for Taryon. “Doty is a big brother, a mom, a little brother…”
  • New episode of All Work No Play (Sam and Liam’s podcast) is going up tomorrow! Sam: “It’s really not our best episode.” Liam: “That’s ludicrous, it’s the best.”
  • Tova’s friends all had names and a bit of connection pre-built with Tova’s backstory.
  • Vax thinks Tary has potential but lacks confidence. Grog, in the middle of the fight, kept seeing him huddled in a ball casting Sanctuary and thinking “…fucking Tary.” 
  • Travis: “Especially now that you don’t have a nanny anymore, Grog’s gonna have to step in and take that role.” Sam: “Honestly, I’m not even sure Taryon can put on his own armor.”
  • Noelle felt like it was a necessary character choice for Tova to stay behind, and also thinks that she’s so driven that a lot of hell’s torture wouldn’t really sink in as long as she still had a sense of duty and purpose. The biggest thing that would be an impediment to her survival would be finding out that her friends had been killed. Wanting to return Vax’s ring would also be a driving force that could keep her going.
  • Vax worked for the Clasp for a while and got into the attitude of doing jobs without fully understanding why, so he’s not too worried about tracking down the anonymous person who requested the rakshasa parts at the Slayer’s Take–as far as he’s concerned, it’s over.
  • Everyone talks about how right up-his-alley the contract is for Percy. Brian: “If Taliesin summoned an army of the damned in real life, that would be the least surprising thing Taliesin has ever done.”
  • Liam: “The lawyer on the other side might argue that [Doty] is less of a party member and more of a Zune.” Sam: “Shut your mouth! He is not a Zune. He’s a Palm Pilot or better.”
  • Noelle: “I think things went pretty well. I killed a pit fiend, I turned into an invisible bear, I airplaned Vax around.” Brian: “You pushed Keyleth out a window.” Noelle: “I did do that.”
  • ASHLEY JOHNSON RETURNS ON THURSDAY
  • Sam on Doty: “I’m unreasonably attached to that robot, he’s pretty great. He’s a cutie.”
  • Travis suggests that Grog could take over writing Tary’s exploits, since he knows two letters now.
  • Liam has no expectations for what’s going to happen in the next episode. No idea what’s gonna happen. Sam points out that there aren’t a lot of loose ends anymore.
  • Travis: “I kept asking how my stomach was feeling, to Matt, as one does in a D&D game. If I shit an imp, we’ll know.”

Talks Machine in the Dark:

  • Travis mentions the K’varn fight as the first time he really felt like things were getting terribly out-of-hand. Liam and Sam both mention getting stuck inside the dragon.
  • Noelle, as a writer, likes the narrative ambiguity of Schrodinger’s Tova and thought that, either way, it was a cool way to go out.
  • My new favorite question: “Does Grog know Minxie is Keyleth?” Travis has to answer that, unfortunately, Grog is fully aware that they’re the same because he was the one who named her back in the home game.
  • Liam thinks the only option if Keyleth had failed that roll would be for Percy to invoke the contract. Travis also brings up the Deck.
  • Noelle tells amazing stories about the graphic novel bible she had growing up. “I’m pretty sure Jezebel isn’t supposed to be your favorite character in the bible, but she had amazing eyeshadow…”
  • Liam tells Travis that next campaign, they’re gonna have to be the note-takers to pay Marisha back for this one. Travis: “I’m gonna have to learn how to write.”
  • Vax will finally stop wearing the armor all the time now that Hotis is out of the picture. “Don’t need to worry about Mercer shanking me in my most intimate moments.”
Spirit Working Cycles

[Disclaimer: This is my personal upg of your body’s natural cycle. Some people have reported either not having a hyperactivity period or having them so subdued that it isn’t an issue, so just use my post as a guideline for discovering your own needs. And natural fallow periods aren’t the cause for every downtime out there, some will be caused by blocks such as past trauma, energetic blockages, spirit influence, sickness and more. Some of those do require some sort of intervention and are good to get rid of!]

One of the biggest things I’ve seen you guys distressed over are the times where you are not working with your spirits! You’re not communicating (if you can communicate at all during this time), you aren’t really aware of their presence, you go ages without wearing their vessels, you just don’t have the strength to keep up with the work you want to do!

And then you grow frantic and anxious over what the spirits are thinking about you. You’re afraid of them hating you and leaving for how long you’ve been ignoring them. Or maybe they could be depressed by your sudden lack of interest, like you’re their best friend who suddenly cut contact and is ignoring their texts and calls. You may be worried about all this during your period of inactivity and can’t fix things despite being aware of them. Maybe the stress is even making it worse than before and now you can’t feel them no matter how hard you try!

So when you start to get in a better spirit working state, you’re afraid of speaking to them now, afraid of what they’ll say and if they hate you and if they’ll ever accept you back as a friend…

Guys, this is totally normal. This is a natural body cycle (well, psychic body cycle!) just like menstruation! I haven’t heard nearly as many people talking about it as I would expect, so let me break down your spiritual fallow periods!

(yes, it’s a lazily drawn graph)

The graph is divided into three horizontal sections: Hyperactivity, Normal State, and Fallow Period. The colored vertical sections are parts I want to pay particular attention to. And finally the curving black line represents your spiritual state.

Area 1: Here, you’re in a state of growth. This is fantastic! You’re learning and improving!

Area 2: You are neither growing nor declining, but there is nothing wrong with this. Many people spend the majority of their time in stasis, their growth periods coming in sudden, sharp increases. Others will almost constantly be in a state of growth too gradual to see. Any way is okay as long as it is your way!

Area 3: This is your decline stage. It isn’t quite a fallow period, but you may notice that you are not quite as sharp as usual or have trouble concentrating on spirit activity. This is fine, it is your body preparing itself for a state of growth, recovering from large energy use, or just focusing on other things. You can also enter a period of stasis before your new growth period as your body recharges. If you feel you are in a stasis period after declining, take some time for both spiritual and mundane self care!

Area 4: Here you have peaked into a time of hyperactivity.. Your senses are better than ever before and your spirit working skills are on fire. This is not necessarily a good thing! Many people don’t know how to manage themselves during this time and end up burning out into area 5. When I was in high school and attended band camp (which wasn’t really camp as much as it was all day summer practices), most parents gave their kids twenty dollars for the entire week’s lunch. As one might expect, the kid spent the entire twenty dollars on day one and spent every other day either hungry or bringing whatever scraps they could find at home. This lack of saving is similar to what you might do during your hyperactivity stage! I’ll speak more later on how to manage this stage.

Area 5: This is a sharp decline after the hyperactivity stage due to burning out. It is possible to exit the hyperactivity stage without going into such a decline, but it cannot be avoided every time. This type of decline typically happens in a very short period of time, even overnight.

Area 6: Here is the moment you’ve been waiting for: your fallow period! This is not a bad thing! Essentially this is your body’s way of resting and recharging so that it can stabilize itself to go back into spiritual matters. Your senses may be distant or nonexistent, your communication may be difficult even with the use of tools, and you may feel a disconnect from spirit work in general. Do not panic and push yourself to do spirit work; you will only damage yourself and spend more time in this state! Strive for self care right and grounding right now. It is perfectly fine to separate from spirit work right now and even recommended for some people. Dive back into the mundane world!

Area 7: Finally, you’ve exited your fallow period! Many people go through growth after their fallow periods because their bodies are so fresh from recharging. Don’t burn yourself out, but feel free to have some celebratory communication with your spirit friends!

So you’re saying my fallow periods aren’t abnormal? They’re good?

ABSOLUTELY! Not only are they good, but they are necessary for you to maintain your abilities! Going without fallow periods would be like going without sleeping. You would eventually crash and burn from the lack of rest, and then your fallow period would be more akin to being knocked unconscious than a good night’s sleep. Don’t try to push them away.

And my spirits really don’t care?

Your spirits are more attuned to spiritual needs than humans. Not only are they going to be aware of this cycle, but they may go through it too. Almost everything goes through it. If you’ve been with a spirit for a long time, you may have noticed times where they don’t communicate much or fade into the background. They also go through periods where they have difficulty communicating with physical creatures. Some will hide this very well, while others will be very upfront on the subject.

How often should I be getting these? How long should they be?

This depends entirely on yourself. Everyone has a different natural cycle. Some people will have cycles of sharp increases and decreases, with every stage lasting in bursts. Others will have almost constant growth, but it is so gradual that they feel as if they are in permanent stasis. Your fallow periods are going to be whatever your body needs. If you need longer periods to recharge then it will be longer, and perhaps lessened in intensity. Others will have shorter periods, but they are more intense because your body has to dip so far down to recharge so quickly. It is not always even, either! Most people have fairly even patterns within their cycles, but it is possible to be everchanging. As for your hyperactivity, this is usually a sharp, albeit short-lived, spike.

Now onto how to manage your cycle!

Signs of entering a hyperactivity period:

  • Pressure, vibrations, buzzing, or other unusual sensations in your third eye and other energy centers
  • Psychic senses are suddenly intensified, possibly to the point of discomfort
  • Feeling as if you are not grounded
  • Difficulty grounding
  • Floating sensation
  • Headaches
  • Disconnection from reality; disassociation
  • More attuned to the astral and physical planes than your physical body
  • Others notice that your energy is bold and even chaotic, much louder than usual
  • You attract spirits more than in your normal energy state
  • Seemingly endless energy for spirit work and other related activities
  • Sudden motivation for spirit work, you may feel an exaggeration of your skill level
  • A disregard for discernment

How to manage a hyperactivity period:

  • Ground frequently! While it may feel useless, it will help to stabilize you in the long run
  • Discharge your energy into crystals and other storage units. It will give an outlet for excess energy and give you boosts when in need
  • Attempt meditations focused around peace, calm, and stability
  • Spend time in a garden or otherwise surrounded by nature, and ground by extending your energy like roots into the earth. Doing this will help to connect yourself to the energy system around you, the plants aiding in keeping you stable
  • This is a good time to look at the big pictures of vast energy systems. Try looking at the energetic connections within a forest, or between houses in a neighborhood.
  • Do not go overboard with spirit work, energy work, magic, etc! You will not start to feel the effects of burning out until it has happened. Work on grounding and stabilizing and try to not overwork yourself.
  • Consistency is the key! Instead of spending your energy all at once, try to use this time to be consistent with your spirit senses and communication. Consistency takes much more energy than you may realize!
  • Although you shouldn’t do everything all at once, that doesn’t mean you can’t get things done right now! Feel free to work on that big project, just pay extra attention to your spiritual health and go easy.
  • Don’t get arrogant or stupid! While confidence is good and important, don’t let your abundance of energy convince you to summon a nuclear doom spirit of death without protection. You will regret power trips.
  • Practice discernment! You may feel concrete in your senses right now but it is just as important as ever
  • PROTECTION!! Some people become larger beacons for spirits during this time, so up your protection and be wary of strange spirits. Even if you do not become more attractive than normal, energy siphoning spirits will still be drawn to the excess of food in you
  • Be extra polite to local spirits. Perhaps put up a ward to quiet your energy to others or if possible avoid going into particularly active locations. Even if they have no wish to snack on you, the loud energy can be obnoxious.

Signs of entering a fallow period:

  • Disinterest and lack of motivation for spirit work, energy work, and magic
  • Psychic senses are distant or nonexistent
  • Tools seem to fail or are difficult to understand
  • You do not naturally notice telepathic speech from spirits
  • Discernment is difficult, or you may feel that nothing is real
  • Attempting spirit work, energy work, or magic exhausts you
  • You are constantly distracted when attempting to meditate or astral travel
  • You think less of your spirits throughout the day
  • You are more drawn to mundane activities, such as watching tv, and feel the need to skip or pay less attention to daily exercises
  • If you feel guilt over ignoring your spirits, you are still unable to communicate well
  • Sudden frustration with your lack of ability and progress, feeling as if you have retrograded
  • Sadness or other negative emotions at the sudden sense of disconnect from your spirits, as if your bonds have disappeared

How to manage a fallow period:

  • Focus on the mundane world! Your body is not meant to be overworking itself on the nonphysical right now
  • Work on gentle physical self care
  • As you breathe in, visualize energy in your body like liquid streams of light collecting and brightening in your third eye and any other places you use as psychic energy organs. As you breathe out, it gently diffuses outwards back throughout your body, dimming as it is once again returned to its regular density. This helps to keep your psychic energy points in shape.
  • Visualize your energy like before, but when you breathe in it flows in a steady, circular cycle upwards from the tip of your toes through your chest. Let it pass through your third eye, and as you breathe out it completes the second half of the cycle by curving downwards, flowing through and cleansing that side’s energy centers as it does so. Rather than being in a single ball, the energy is in a constant, equal flow like the blood in your veins. This helps to keep your energy clean and flowing and cuts down the risk of stagnation during your fallow period.
  • If you must do any sort of spirit or energy work, make sure it is very slow and gentle like the two exercises above. It must not conflict with your body’s rest. If you wish to practice meditation, don’t do anything requiring long periods of focus or that demands energy. Try doing meditations for sleep or calm which do not involve any spirit contact, but only focus on relaxing your body.
  • Spiritual protection based in the physical plane is very good to have for when your fallow periods occur! These are things such as witch jars and large scale crystal grids. It is easier to keep these clean and working, since you may not be able to sense purely nonphysical protection like wards at all.
  • If you wish to remind your spirits that you have them in your thoughts, include them in a daily meal by offering its energy as you eat. Simply thinking this will most likely be enough for them to hear, but if you want to be certain, say it aloud or whisper it if with company!
  • Before you go to bed, invite your spirits to sit with you as you tell them about your day, no matter how mundane. Even if you can’t sense them around you, this will show them that you are still keeping them in your thoughts and taking the time to include them in your day!
  • However, it’s also okay to simply push spirit work to the back of your mind and focus on pressing mundane matters. They will understand.
  • Above all, remember that your spiritual self is resting and recharging. Do what your own body needs to encourage this rest. Don’t try to rush past it or forcibly stuff energy into yourself, most likely you’ll end up hurt and elongating this period.

So hopefully this guide will help on the stress everyone seems to get during their fallow periods! It’s always important for us to understand the natural workings of our bodies, whether physical or nonphysical. Start including your daily thoughts on your current location in your body’s cycle to start recognizing your patterns, and maybe to even predict when your natural downtimes will occur!

First of all... Yes

Originally posted by alinok

A/N: This was actually requested by @allipotterhead1 (my first request, may I add) and I got a bit carried away but I didn’t want to miss anything out, I hope you like it, I tried my best!

Request: “Jughead x plus size reader, where their relationship is a secret. In which the reader is Kevin’s sister and one time they have a heavy make out session and Kevin, Veronica, Betty and Archie just walk in on them and Betty and Veronica are losing their shit because they ship it so hard, Kevin is totally sweet but excited and already plans their future but Archie asks him why he would date someone like her? I know it’s really specific but I can’t get this idea out of my head and I’m an awful writer… (And I don’t mean to hate on Archie, I really love him, but I love me some good angst)”

Word Count: 2,761 (jeez, this is long)

Warnings: Angst, Archie’s a bit of a dick, there is a swear word, and some makin’ out.

Keep reading

Why Robert E.O. Speedwagon deserves your love

So today I found myself writing a fucking essay on Speedwagon. Please enjoy.

I feel like people never really- and I mean really- talk about just how strong Speedwagon’s connection to the Joestars is. And it all started because Jonathan Joestar didn’t kick him as hard as he could have.

I’ve always gotten the impression that Jonathan was one of the first people to show Speedwagon genuine kindness; it’s even more meaningful when you realize that Speedwagon initially stereotyped Jonathan as a dumb rich kid. But Jonathan not only held back against Speedwagon when they fought, he stated that his reason for doing so was because he understood that Speedwagon had a family who would mourn his death. Jonathan didn’t want to put them through the same sadness that he himself was going through. In an era where classism was at its highest, a nobleman acknowledged that a street crook had loved ones and had just as much a right to live as he did.

I think that just completely blew Speedwagon’s fucking mind.

Keep reading

The Only Exception (Part 3)

Summary: AU. Reader is given the task of running a popular love advice internet show when her coworker is fired. Her cynical attitude toward love makes her offer some harsh advice, and more than a few hearts are caught in the aftermath. Will hers be one of them?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 3,523

Warnings: language, fluff, wishful thinking, hot firemen, sarcasm, cynicism, bad jokes, drinking, sad story retelling (mentions of death and loss)

A/N: Moving right along…and yes, I used a Keep Reading line. Also, shout out to @redgillan for making my day brighter.

Part - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4

Originally posted by kittyseb

Keep reading

Modern AU with nothing special going on, no aliens, no magic space lions, nada.

Shiro works as a social worker and helps out at a private institution for orphans that aren’t good fits for regular foster homes. Keith is a kid whose parents died when he was young and he was sent to his next of kin. Spoiler: They’re awful. They get a call from a concerned neighbor and it turns out Keith had been severely neglected to the point where he’s mostly nonverbal, and Shiro’s workplace takes custody of him.

Shiro was the first one on the scene and he was the one who coaxed Keith out of the house, he made sure to speak softly and tell him that he was safe and, when he figured out that Keith couldn’t or wouldn’t speak, made sure to ask yes or no questions that he could nod or shake his head to. Because he didn’t even have a change of clothes, Shiro gave Keith his jacket and let him keep it and now Keith just latches onto him instantly.

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somebody else // stiles stilinski

Summary: Stiles broke her heart and now she can never look at him the same. They remained friends, but she can’t exactly find it in herself to truly forgive Stiles and he doesn’t know how to accept her new relationship with the one person he can’t stand. Overtime, they both eventually got over each other… or have they?

Requested: no, collab with @minhosmeanhoe

Warning: no, mature language & themes throughout

Inspired by this song

Masterlist

With a red solo cup in hand, he took a seat on Lydia’s couch. It had become his signature spot every time she threw a party. He’d usually sit there and watch the people around him until he’d have too much to drink or he couldn’t stand to hear one more techno pop remix. Taking a sip of a mystery liquid that burned his throat, he shot Malia a small smile as he caught her eye on the dance floor. She returned the gesture and kept dancing with the other girl around her.

“Why do you always sit on this stupid couch when I go out of my way to throw a killer party?” Lydia pouted, taking a seat next to Stiles. A smile spread across his lips as he rested his arm across the back of the couch. 

Keep reading

So as some of you may know, I have finished acowar. Now that my mind is sufficiently ruined, I present to you this fic about the High Lord of the Winter Court and his mate.

This doesn’t really spoil anything in acowar, rather than their existence. So read if you want, acowar not necessarily needed!

This was requested by @ignite-my-love who is suffering as much as I am when it comes to this bloody book. 

***

How could this be?

Fifty years, and the wretched Amarantha was destroyed by a… mortal? A human?

Viviane’s hands shook, her breath coming out in sporadic sheer clouds as she hyperventilated. She was on the floor, her legs too unstable to carry her any longer. She would see him again, her beautiful High Lord, her love.

She was going to kick his ass. And kiss him. Not necessarily in that order.

I’ve loved you, since we were children. I will always love you, and being your friend is, and always will be, my greatest achievement. I beg of you, protect what is left, Vivane, and I will see you soon enough.

He had not seen her soon enough. Kallias had projected that to her the moment he knew there was no escaping Amarantha’s clutches, and let her protect their haven, which she tirelessly did, while he sacrificed himself to that wench. It wasn’t until he confessed his love to her that she knew the extent of her feelings for him. Her love for him was like the cauldron, and he was the sorcerer reaching far down into her, stirring her soul and wielding her being. She was utterly his, and she thought she would never be able to tell him. That was, until, Feyre Cursebreaker, former prisoner of the Spring Court, had shattered Amarantha’s deadly reign.

She rose to her feet, supporting herself on the marble columns of Kallias’ palace. He would be here soon, and when he did, he would see her standing – fighting – as she always had Before.

Because now there was a Before. It used to be Before and After the War. Now, it was Before and After Amarantha.

She looked out the wide, glassless, window. This was her home, and it would remain that way. The vast expanse of rolling white and treacherous mountains calmed her faltering breaths. She had never stopped to think about this moment - her reunion with her love. Had dwelled many time of how she was going to get here, the plans she concocted, the atrocities she committed in saving her people, but never let herself think – dream, hope, wish – about this moment.

She was still wearing the filthy pants, tunic and fur cloak she had been for the past eight days. It was spattered in blood and dirt and mud and Mother knows what else, but when she was constantly like this she didn’t see the point of washing. She thought maybe should change, to present herself nicely for Kallias, and then she snorted at the thought. That idiot could see her parading around in a pink tutu and nothing else and she still wouldn’t feel embarrassment. She was too far gone for that. She laughed lightly at the thought of Kallias’ face if he saw her gallivanting around, breasts free and lower half covered by hideous tulle. He would tell her to put some clothes on before she freezed, and she would tell him to shove his shiny shoes up his ass.

“Is something funny? It’s been a while since I’ve heard a joke.”

The voice stopped her thoughts. Stopped her breathing. Stopped her heart.

She turned her head, and there he was.

Kallias.” Her voice broke.

“Vivi-”

She didn’t let him finish, just sprinted the few paces between them and collided into him - throwing her arms around his neck, kissing him fiercely. His arms went to her waist, lifting her off the floor as he returned her embrace and kiss. Her legs went around him, and her hands tangled in his white hair.

She may have remained in the Winter Court the last fifty years, but now she was finally home.

His lips moved to her face and neck, kissing any part he could reach.

“I love you, you bloody bastard. Never leave me again or I’ll freeze your balls off and feed them to the bears.” She meant it with the upmost sincerity, but that didn’t stop her from whimpering her words.

“I’ve missed you more than the drylands miss rain, more than the stars miss night, more than-”

“I love you, Kallias. I love you.” She smashed her lips against his again, and she could taste the snow of his scent, the pine that always reminded her of him. She could taste the salt of their collective tears, and feel his heart racing as he pulled her further against him. He walked them forward, still holding up her body and soul, and pressed her against the cold wall. It was a good release, her body become so hot from his touch she wouldn’t be surprised if she left steam in her wake. His hands freely roamed under her coat, slipping above her shirt to touch her oh-so-warm skin.

“You kept me alive, Viviane.” He shuddered. “Not my body, but my resolve, my soul. Every moment was just another until I could return to you. I love you. I should’ve – I should’ve told you before but I was scared.” He rested his forehead to her, and her legs were once again holding her up.

“What’s done is done, never spend another moment of what-ifs, my love. We are here now, we can rectify this now.” She swallowed hard, her emotion tightening her throat.

He placed a sweet, barely there kiss to the skin just under her ear. She could feel his whole body trembling as he slowly got to his knees, pressing his face to her stomach. “Viviane, be my wife. Please, I’ll marry you tonight. I never want there to be another moment where I am not completely and utterly yours.”

A choked sob escaped her at the question, and he looked at her not in alarm, but in understanding.

“Not tonight,” she gasped.

He nodded, but remained on his knees in front of her. His calloused hands were around her calves now, rubbing smooth circles on the tight muscles there.

“We will not marry tonight, because you will make me your wife now. I’ll change into a dress, and you can summon a priestess, and within the hour we will be bound.”

His eyes pierced into her like she was a Goddess he had prayed to for eternity, and maybe, just maybe, she was. “A dress? You could look like a lumberjack and I’d still want you.”

“The dress isn’t for you, silly male.” She patted his head jokingly. “Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve worn something elegant? Far too long, is the answer, and I plan to look ravishing when I take you as my own.”

*

He had devoured her.

Worshipped her.

Made love to her.

Their souls had sung to one another as their bodies connected. And as Kallias and Viviane were at their highest state of pleasure, the bond had snapped into place, sealing them together everlasting.



If you’d like to checkout some more, you can find my masterlist here :) 

Jupiter thru the houses
  • 1st: The concept of expansive experience, inner growth, and higher learning are integral parts of your identity. Your identity is always expanding into a vast complexity towards a new awareness of being. Your growth does not stop for a minute, you have to grow and expand constantly or you don't know who you are. You are likely to feel some air of Saggitarius in your life, even if there is nothing in Sagg in your chart. You're gonna find solace in traveling, exploring new philosophies or spiritual concepts, and interacting with new energy throughout life.. This feels normal to you.. Its your natural state of being.
  • 2nd: With this placement one finds their expansion and growth in life through the way they physically materialize on this world with your unique set of values. This means that one is likely to find work that is in alignment with their values. Material and physical abundance should find constant expansion through life. If this person is a musician they will have all of the best guitars, if this person is a health nut they will have a job at the coolest raw juice bar in town, if this person loves fashion they will acquire all of the best clothes that speak to their spirit. This is a great placement because you will find spiritual growth and relevance in your work, your money, and your material possessions. (my placement)
  • 3rd: Communicating and thinking is how you reach those levels of expansion. New concepts, new people, new experiences.. It's all taken in and processed.. The product of this is your deeper awareness towards how you have grown and expanded through that experience, person, or concept. Expansion and spiritual growth is always a process in your mind.. These are the people who need to write or communicate their experience in order to take what it is they have learned from it.
  • 4th: Expansion and spiritual growth is found here in the home.. Whatever your concept of home is.. You are growing through the intimate feeling of security you feel with certain people or places. Childhood and family is a large focus of your Jupiter here because your Jupiter lives within the home. Your mother and your father, brothers and sisters, the children you birth out of your womb someday.. They mean the most to you, they are your deepest teachers, they are the ones who hold the energy to expand your soul.
  • 5th: Expansion through breaking free in freedom of expression. You are growing and learning by letting yourself shine, express, and freeing your creativity for all of the world to see. This is a theme for you in life naturally, however, your choice to grow lies within the choice to put yourself in the spotlight.. Whether that be on stage, in a relationship, or at home.. When you shine your light, you are expanding your spirit. This is such a beautiful placement for that reason. You will continuously find your spirit deeper by expressing that Leo energy.
  • 6th: Your expansion lies in your routine and the way you approach day to day life. This is a fascinating planet because Jupiter is the ultimate source of growing expansion and the 6th house is very confined to the Virgoan concepts of order and service. With this placement I see an importance for one to create a daily practice of SOMETHING, running, mediation, eating the same thing, ect.. through focused implemented order in life is where they find their deepest sense of growth. Its like harvesting that routine to keep growing and growing PERFECT order and power. A grounded placement for Jupiter.
  • 7th: The energy that bounces off you to another, vise versa, the laughs shared, the kisses, the crying, the hugs, the fights... This is where you learn, grow, and expand as a person. Your spiritual growth is interlinked with the relationships you have in life. In the eyes of others is where you will find your most prominent teachings in life. Connection means so much to you, the words spoken to you by another absorb into your soul and grow your awareness of who you are in this reality.
  • 8th: Ahh Jupiter here is no stranger to the intensity life has to offer. You are finding your spiritual growth and expansion through all that the 8th house rules. Death, sex, birth, metaphysical, psychic, secrets, magick, depth, shadow, hidden, occult, transformations, ect. Transformation is a large area of focus for the 8th house, your expansion and spiritual awareness will continuously die and rebirth into something new as you grow. You get to those levels of growth through intense things in your life, maybe its a crazy ass sexual relationship you have, maybe its a secret that was given to you for you to hide, maybe it was deepening spiritual experience through touching upon working with the metaphysical, I am ruled by the 8th house so I could say so much... Long story short.. What the 8th house rules.. Is what you will always find yourself in when your in the process of spiritual expansion.
  • 9th: So this placement would be similar to the first house accept it wouldn't be as large of a focus in your identity as it would be a natural theme of your life. These people find themselves living in concepts of the 9th house effortlessly. You are a natural philosopher, foreign traveler, and seeker of spiritual truth. From a young age you probably have found yourself traveling to different cultures, visiting a church or a temple, and found your surroundings held philosophical energies. There is a likelihood you have had and always do have a strong Sagittarius presence around you whether that be the people in your life or the experiences you have. Swimming in the energy of Sagittarius is where you expand... Very simple.. Very beautiful.
  • 10th: Your career and public image are areas of your expansion in life. Whether you are a self-made candle maker or a desk job worker at a corporation.. Your career field will always find expansion into greater heights. This is a blessing to your public image, you will be seen as someone who is capable to expand into something greater. You will bring positive and insightful energy to others around you in the workplace. You bring Jupiter energy into your career field. Your presence uplifts your work and your co-workers. If you have this placement I ask of you, never ever stop dreaming when it comes to your career and public image. You are so capable of reaching any height you desire.
  • 11th: You are going to find your expansion in life through being apart of groups and the collective. You are very absorbent in the filter of how your awareness grows when you are in the presence of a group. Everyone's different energies merge into you evoking Jupiter's expansion. You'll find that you continue to grow and expand in the groups and tribes you find throughout your journey. Each one bigger and brighter with a new level of expansive promise. You also bring this expansive energy to the table when you enter a group setting as well. Friendships, the concept of a team, and collective energy is a large focus in your life.
  • 12: You find your spiritual expansion in the unconscious giving realms of the 12th house. With this placement one is likely to have a natural affinity and understanding of spiritual energy. You expand within the natural flow of your spirit. Meditation, energy work, astral projecting, psychedelic experimentation, crystals, art, etc.. Are all sources of transformation for you. Also with this placement you will find expansion in helping others, giving generosity of your energy field to benefit others on the emotional realm. There needs to be care taken with this placement that there isn't over-giving and also not diving too deep in the world of fantasy.