Damon Albarn rides a bicycle partly because he likes riding a bicycle, and partly because he doesn’t have a driving licence. After several attempts he did finally pass his test when he was 30, but in his first, and only, year on the road he was caught three times by speed cameras and had his licence taken away. That was when he learned that, even if you’re a 30-year-old boy racer, when you lose a new licence you have to take your test again. Meanwhile, in the interim, the powers-that-be had introduced the multiple theory test. Damon has now failed the multiple choice theory test five times. The single fact, and the reasons for it, may perhaps tell you more about the way Damon Albarn and the world face up to each other, for better and for worse, than perhaps anything else. “I’ve got a problem with some of the choices,” he explains. “I don’t agree with them.” Almost anyone else, if they took issue with any of the “correct” answers on their theory driving test, might nonetheless be prepared to tick the box required, and to register their dissent in another way. Damon, naturally, refuses to do this. “No!” he says. “I disagree with them! ‘If you see someone by the side of the road who looks ill, what do you do?’ I might do something entirely different to what they say! It doesn’t mean it’s wrong.” The last time he went to take the test, he was so embarrassed to be returning yet again that he went in disguise: “a suit and glasses and stuff - being silly, really”. It made no difference - instead of failing as Damon Albarn he failed as Damon Albarn in disguise. “I don’t like exams,” he says. “I don’t like being judged.” So he’s planning to stick with his bicycles and his principles. “Me and cars don’t really get on,” he says. “I’m a rubbish driver, and there’s way too many of them, obviously.”
“I’ve got a problem with some of the choices, I don’t agree with them.” BEST EXCUSE EVER lol
This is how I know my parents are huge fucking weebs
We went to a sushi restaurant for my mom’s bday last night. My sister Taylor, my dad and I arrived first, waiting for my mom and my sister and her fiance to get there. Anyway, my dad’s looking at the menu and he goes “Haha, hey guys, look. A Naruto roll” and points to a piece of sushi labeled Naruto.
Well, my mom gets there and she opens her menu and not five minutes in, Taylor and I hear my mom tell my dad “Ohh look, honey. A Naruto roll!”. I looked at Taylor and she was like “I saw it too when I first got here, but I can at least control my weeb in public”
We just shook our heads and laughed because of these two losers.