i laughed for like 50 years

every year seemingly on the dot there’s an article about this, and to your average New Yorker who reads the news this is probably your only ‘negative’ article about the Hamptons.  And like, yeah, this shit is annoying, people will fly really fucking low in secluded areas and if you live on the flight path you might get like 40 helicopters a day, but honestly?

This is no where near the biggest issue the Hamptons faces.  Not even close.  But it’s an issue that gets hits because it lets us laugh at an issue that’s mostly millionaires vs billionaires because in the popular imagination those are the only people who live in the Hamptons.  More on that in a second but here are some of the issues that your average person faces and sees.

50 people died in the Hamptons from opiod abuse last year.  That might not seem like a lot but in towns where the year-round population numbers in the hundreds its huge, and it grew by 70% last year.  I had this conversation with a friend a year back about this, about how if you stay in the Hamptons there’s this point you get to where everyone you know knows someone who died either because of drugs or because of alcohol.  

Homelessness is a pervasive issue in the east end too, and it’s an issue that’s gotten infinitely worse with the arrival of AirBNB.  Montauk in particular is awful about this; rent goes from around 800 a month for a room to more than a thousand a week (or a day) during the summer, and, and this is just a fun anecdote, but there’s an abandoned army base in Montauk that was the inspiration for the army base in Stranger Things, and it’s basically a shanty town during the summer for people who are just working as waiters and taxi drivers but who can’t afford close to a room there.  In general cost of living is high as hell, you might be able to snag a 15$ an hour job if you’re lucky but if you’re not then lunch still goes for twelve at least and nearly all the retail space in any village is dedicated to shit that you could never possibly afford.

The rampant increase in housing prices has also priced out historic black communities in the Hamptons which gets to another issue which is the brutal and pervasive segregation the region faces.  It’s even getting to the point where a NYC style private-public schooling system is de facto in place which drains funding from Latino, African American, and Native American majority districts as the rich white kids go to a pseudo-private school.  The Latino and black communities exist basically outside of the dominant white communities and neighboring Hampton Bays (which is or is not in the Hamptons depending on who you ask) has the largest KKK chapter in the United States.  

This isn’t even getting into the issues with public transit, the issues with environmental degradation, suicide rates, etc.  These issues, of drug addiction, pervasive poverty, racism, hopelessness, they’re, like, none of it will probably sound new to you.  They’re issues in nearly every rural community in the United States.  But, even though the Hamptons are a mere 100 miles away from NYC and gets more media attention than your average town in New Mexico or Indiana or Montana, these issues are hardly ever talked about in the context of the Hamptons.  Two years ago if you were looking for a mass media depiction of poverty in the Hamptons you had like two or three articles to go on, tops.  

What gets me about the pervasiveness of these “oh these stupid rich people and their rich people problems” articles seem to me to be like the horrifying end phase of the hyper-gentrification of the Hamptons.  A town becomes a target for rich summergoers, it becomes known as a resort town, and gradually the poor people (who live everywhere, who work everywhere) fade from view and disappear from the public image.  They become the subaltern of their own home, known only under the signifier of ‘local’, as hillbillies with hick accents. Their history is forgotten as their past becomes similarly owned by the people who own their house, who own their labor (seriously before the Eastville Historical society was formed in the 1980s the history of the Hamptons working class which was a beautiful combination of Irish and East European immigrants, Native Americans, and freed slaves was nearly entirely forgotten).  The changes the region needs are radical but they are not even thinkable because the only constituency we can imagine are the millionaires who’s problems amount to a guy driving over their house in a helicopter once or twice a day.

That’s why, beyond the fact that I lived there for nearly 16 years, the Hamptons are important to me. Because it’s the end of the line for where our economic model goes.  Because it goes along the line where gentrification crosses into colonization.

Reita and Uruha vs a 50-year-old man who is in love with Kai

Dark Side Mail

Reita (reading mail): “Listen to my Dad’s dark side. So we like the GazettE together, but my dad loves Kai a weird amount. When he gets drunk, out of nowhere he’ll be like ‘I love Kai..’ and I’ve caught him watching DVDs to see Kai. He says his dream is to smoke a cigarette with Kai. And he says he wants to get a World Tour VIP ticket and shake hands with Kai before he retires. I’m grateful that we can appreciate the same music together. Please watch out for my 50-year-old father’s passion. And I love Uruha with the same passion. Please take care of yourselves and keep working hard! PS - I don’t believe my Dad is 'like that’.”

(Uruha was giggling this whole time)

Uruha: So I guess the Dad just, you know, he has a family…and he just loves Kai too?

Reita: Well, we don’t know in what way he loves him…

Uruha: Well you see, we understand the true nature of this individual human called Kai.

Reita: Yes.

Uruha: We understand what kind of being he is, his ecology.

Reita: Ecology (dying laughing)

Uruha: We know what he likes, what he is living for.

Reita: Yes.

Uruha: We have a thorough understanding.

Reita: We have a thorough understanding, yes.

Uruha: Yes…and that is why he horrifies us.

(both burst out laughing)

Reita: So anyway, he says he wants to get a world tour VIP ticket and shake hands with him before he retires, and he’s 50 now, and I guess he’ll retire at 60? 65? Well let’s say 60, so that’s in 10 more years. So we gotta do a world tour then, huh. Cause you know at the end we shake hands with the fans, that’s his dream.

Uruha: Aw but that’s so nice of him.

Reita: Yeah, smoking a cigarette with Kai tho…does he even smoke now?

Uruha: Yeah, I think…I think he actually does.

Reita: Well he says he quit…

Uruha: He doesn’t smoke in front of us.

Reita: And like, I thought he had quit but…you know how he is…

(both laugh)

Uruha: Can we be saying this stuff?

Reita: No but really, he was sneaking cigarettes before, I found a pack in his jacket pocket. And then I was like, “hey, you’re smoking aren’t you,” and he was like “What’s that!?”

(both laugh)

Reita: But no I don’t think he smokes now…

Since last year’s 365 days of journaling was so successful here’s a new one to complete in 2016!

Feel free to share and tag me in anything you upload for me to have a nose at - although this is not necessary. Enjoy!

1. Do you believe in New Year resolutions? If so what are your resolutions for this year?
2. Review of 2015
3. How could you help others this year?
4. How can you help yourself this year?
5. What do you want to achieve this year?
6. List ways to succeed personally this year.
7. Your personality traits.
8. List ways to treat yourself this year.
9. Describe your sense of humor.
10. Is your family supportive?
11. List 6 things you love about Winter.
12. Compare your present self to your past self.
13. Would you want to live in a city, suburb or in the country?
14. How would you like to be remembered?
15. Your star sign.
16. Write about a recent adventure or travels.
17. What are your three largest priorities?
18. Write a letter to someone you need to forgive.
19. My goal tomorrow is…
20. My strengths are …
21. Technology – good or bad?
22. What’s your motto?
23. List words you most overuse.
24. What have you sacrificed?
25. Spirit animal?
26. What makes you unique?
27. List the worst books you’ve read.
28. Would you want to grow up in the public eye?
29. How much self-control do you have?
30. What are your best character traits?
31. List ten simple short goals for this month.
32. What emotion dominates your life lately?
33. Who made you feel good this week?
34. I want to always remember….
35. Do you believe in ghosts?
36. What hurts today?
37. In your imagination, what will the world be like in 50 years?
38. List of flowers.
39. List five acts you feel guilty about.
40. Walking in the rain is…
41. Did your parents sacrifice for you?
42. The things that make me laugh the hardest are…
43. How do you feel about your appearance?
44. How do you feel about Valentine’s Day?
45. List of favourite drinks.
46. Have you ever lost something valuable?
47. Ten ways I show those I love that I care are…
48. Do you like exercise?
49. What does forgiveness mean to you?
50. Dream job.
51. Recipe for a perfect night in.
52. List 10 things you love about yourself.
53. What you know about the day you were born? Tell any family stories that were told to you.
54. Summarise today using no more than forty four words.
55. A memory you wish you could forget?
56. Favourite colour?
57. Receipts of things you’ve bought this week.
58. List ten things that scare you about getting old?
59. Where do you escape to?
60. ‘I wish I could’ list.
61. Describe visits to your grandparents’ home.
62. Books or E-Books?
63. How do you feel about commitment in general?
64. What do you think is the greatest invention? Why?  
65. List 5 actresses.
66. Describe your parents’ philosophy of raising children: discipline, rules and outlook.
67. I wish there were no more…..
68. Favourite family story?
69. Do/did you like school?
70. Your proudest moment.
71. 10 television shows.
72. If you had only one wish, what would you wish for?
73. Where is home for you?
74. Favourite restaurant?
75. Five Things I’ve Forgiven People For and Why.
76. List 6 things you love about Spring.
77. How do you like to be romanced?
78. How do you indulge yourself?
79. What is your favourite Saturday activity?
80. What famous world festivals would you like to attend?
81. Are you a wallflower?
82. How well do you take criticism?
83. Did you have a favourite blanket or toy? Tell about it.
84. List 5 actors.
85. Describe a typical day in school.
86. List 3 things that went wrong today.
87. How would you describe yourself?
88. What do you like best about your home?
89. What makes you a good person?
90. What did you most enjoy doing this week?
91. Do you let people in?
92. Tell about your favourite aunt or uncle. Were you close? What do you remember most?
93. How do you stand out from the crowd?
94. Which quality best describes your life–exciting, organised, dull–and why?
95. I want to forget…
96. Write a fan letter to your favourite actor/actress.
97. What historical figure do you most identify with?
98. My worst experience today was …
99. Whose advice do you seek in times of need?
100. Something you have always felt was missing in your life
101. Name one thing you always wanted to do, but haven’t.  What has prevented you from doing it?
102. Helplessness: that dull, sick feeling of not being the one at the reins. When did you last feel like that –- and what did you do about it?
103. Favourite activities.
104. Do you feel lovable?
105. Review a book.
106. Today I overheard…
107. You karaoke/shower song.
108. Explore the room you’re in as if you’re seeing it for the first time. Pretend you know nothing. What do you see? Who is the person who lives there?
109. A list of questions you would like to ask future you.
110. Go to the nearest window. Look out for a full minute. Write about what you saw.
111. Write about your school life, your grades, what you wish you had done differently.
112. List favourite desserts.
113. How important is loyalty to you?
114. List 15 characters from movies.
115. Your most embarrassing moment.
116. What’s on your calendar for tomorrow?
117. Best decision you’ve made?
118. ‘Things to try’ list.
119. Rainy days or sunshine adventures?
120. What would you do if money were no object?
121. Who do you relate with the most – your mother or father?
122. I’m thankful for…
123. Write about regrets you may have.
124. Create a moodboard that reflects today’s feelings.
125. Ten things you hold most dear.
126. Who was your first crush and what made them special?
127. When have you felt lonely?
128. Your most satisfying victory.
129. Something you have always felt was missing in your life
130. Write a letter to someone who believed in you even when you didn’t believe in yourself.
131. What does being a friend means to you?
132. How would you change the world to make it better?
133. What’s the most surreal experience you’ve ever had?
134. Favourite childhood memory?
135. Are you an emotional person?
136. A-Z list of favourite things.
137. When was the last time someone gave you butterflies?
138. Write about turning points in your life – what would be different now if you had made a different choice.
139. Is physical attraction important to you?
140. Is money important to you?
141. Explain why you chose your blog’s title and what it means to you.
142. Do you have/want any tattoos? Their meaning?
143. What did you learn this week?
144. Who are your heroes?
145. List 3 things that went right today.
146. How do you feel during a thunderstorm?
147. Do you forgive things easily?
148. Write about lost friendships.
149. My weaknesses are …
150. Favourite emoticons.
151. Are you more like your mother or father?
152. Night or day?
153. List of countries to visit.
154. Describe the area you live in.
155. A secret no one knows.
156. List of favourite languages.
157. List of favourite designers.
158. What qualities do you want in a romantic partner?
159. Research and find a new poem today.
160. List 5 things you hate/dislike.
161. Write something inspired by a recent dream you had.
162. What excuses keep me stuck?
163. Your lucky number?
164. List 5 animals.
165. Tell us about something you know you should do … but don’t.
166. Favourite animation movie.
167. Do you apologise too much?
168. List of things that stress you.
169. Favourite recipe?
170. When was the last time someone told you they were proud of you?
171. Favourite places visited.
172. Write about your childhood.
173. If your life had a soundtrack, like a movie, what songs would you include? Why?
174. Optimist or pessimist?
175. Take any poem or short story you find anywhere. Rewrite it in your own words.
176. How do you feel when you’re leaving home on vacation?
177. Open up a dictionary to a random word. Define what that word means to you.
178. List restaurants to visit.
179. Choose an animal. Write about it!
180. Write a celebrity crush list.
181. What are you afraid of? Why?
182. Five things I love about relationships…
183. Close your eyes and imagine the kind of world you would like to see.  What is it like?
184. My best experience today was …
185. ‘Books to read’ list.
186. What does religion mean to you?
187. ‘Rainy day’ list.
188. The biggest challenge you’ve faced?
189. Your favourite instrument (to play/listen to)?
190. List of fears.
191. List of everything you’d like to say yes to.
192. Favourite pieces of art.
193. My worst experience today was …
194. Ten things that scare you about getting old?
195. List the cheesiest jokes you know.
196. When you look in the mirror, what do you see?
197. A character that you relate to.
198. List toys from your childhood.
199. What talents do you have?
200. List of unhealthy habits.
201. What is your favourite sound?
202. List things that make you feel safe.
203. Find an image in a magazine that reflects your current emotional status.
204. List 8 music artists.
205. When have you experienced heartbreak?
206. I feel most energized when…
207. List things that make you laugh.
208. Choose – Harry Potter, Twilight, Hunger Games or Maze Runner?
209. List the 5 most expensive things you’ve bought.
210. Receipts from today.
211. If you could become an expert in any subject or activity, what would it be?
212. List of rituals.
213. Favourite authors.
214. List hobbies.
215. So far I’ve learned these lessons about life …
216. What’s the funniest thing that happened to you this week?
217. A moodboard of patterns.
218. Using 10 words, describe yourself.
219. Movie review.
220. What are your thoughts on camping?
221. What’s one thing you’d change about your appearance if you could? What’s one character trait you’d change?
222. What would your perfect day be like?
223. A fictional place you wish you could visit?
224. List of websites.
225. Favourite menu.
226. What are things you can do in 15 minutes or less that improve your mood?
227. Favourite fast food.
228. If you could get the answer to any question, what would you ask?
229. List things you find beautiful.
230. Describe your alter ego — someone who is your exact opposite.
231. 3 pieces of advice for past you?
232. What is your mission in life?
233. If you could go back and relive one day of your life, which day would it be and why?
234. What would you do if you could travel into the past?
235. What is the one thing you feel always brings out the good in people?
236. A quote that inspires you.
237. What relationships matter the most to you? How can you maintain and improve them?
238. What is your favourite room in your home and why?
239. Do you believe in the afterlife?
240. ‘Inside my bag’ list.
241. How often do you leave your comfort zone?
242. I am happiest when…
243. Cold or hot?
244. Do you believe one person can change the world?
245. Describe a time when you were brave.
246. Favourite Games List.
247. I’ve been putting off…
248. List ways to relieve stress?
249. When do you feel underappreciated?
250. Define your personal style.
251. List 8 things that you enjoy.
252. Did a teacher ever have a profound effect on you?
253. Three things I value about myself are….
254. Random Facts About Me List
255. What role do you play in your family?
256. List sports you love/hate.
257. What would the title of your biography be and why?
258. A promise you have broken?
259. List the emotions you’ve felt today.
260. What effect does music have on you?
261. Favourite poem.
262. Doodle here.
263. Favourite piece of jewellery.
264. List 15 characters from books.
265. Are you hard on yourself?
266. Summarise the day in one sentence.
267. If and when I raise children, I’ll never…
268. Write about your first kiss.  Was it everything you wished or hoped it would be?
269. Book review.
270. What does family mean to you?
271. Your favourite photo of you.
272. List of things that annoy you.
273. How productive are you?
274. What was the title of the last book you read?
275. List 6 things you love about Summer.
276. Doodle here.
277. What would you do if you knew you could not fail?
278. What did you learn today?  What did you learn yesterday?
279. Shuffle your iPod, list first 10 ten songs.
280. Make a list of 30 things that make you smile.
281. I couldn’t imagine living without…
282. What would you do if you could travel into the future?
283. Quotes that ignite something in you?
284. I really wish others knew this about me…
285. Your biggest achievement?
286. I feel happiest in my skin when…
287. Organised or organised chaos?
288. List of everything you’d like to say no to.
289. Who inspires you?
290. List your top 10 movies.
291. Write the words you need to hear.
292. List your responsibilities.
293. What is your favourite holiday? What makes this holiday special?
294. Why you get up in the morning.
295. Tea or coffee? Why? Favourites?
296. What do you want to know about yourself?
297. List of House Rules
298. The biggest headline of today and your feelings on it.
299. My best birthday was…
300. List of things that make you worry.
301. Land or Sea?
302. My imaginary friend growing up was…
303. List 10 songs.
304. What is your passion?
305. What kind of day have you had, and why?
306. List of favourite subjects at school.
307. Most romantic date you’ve been on?
308. Tell about an event in your life that has caused a change in you.
309. Best thing that’s happened this month?
310. What’s the Most Memorable Thing You Ever Got in the Mail?
311. List of friends’ names.
312. What are your most prized possessions?
313. Favourite type of weather?
314. Who has had the most impact on your life?
315. List of favourite snacks.
316. What song have you listened to today?
317. List 6 things you love about Autumn.
318. Your feelings on war.
319. What are all your thoughts on god?
320. Make a list of 15 escapes you would like to indulge in.
321. What is a mistake people often make about you?
322. What makes you a bad person?
323. How your parents met.
324. What kind of day are you having, and why?
325. Favourite family photo?
326. I was most angry when…
327. List 10 skills you bring to a work environment.
328. What were your favourite picture books when you were younger?
329. A-Z list of things you’d like to try.
330. If you have brothers or sisters, how are you similar to them or different from them? What about with your friends?
331. What song was No.1 when you were born?
332. List of favourite childhood shows.
333. Do you follow fashion trends?
334. Your favourite season?
335. Can you be alone with yourself?
336. List of favourite magazines.
337. Your beliefs about Karma.
338. What’s something you disagree with about the way you were raised?
339. Growing up, what did you really want but never received.
340. Favourite lyrics?
341. Is love at first sight possible?
342. List 12 shops.
343. Have you ever been in love?
344. Favourite month of the year?
345. Do you have any family traditions?
346. Is Christmas a big holiday to you and your family?
347. Favourite Christmas images.
348. Who is someone you miss?
349. List of names you will by buying gifts for this year.
350. What are you planning to buy as a gift this year?
351. What’s the best gift you’ve ever given?
352. What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?
353. When did you stop believing in Santa?
354. Favourite Christmas song?
355. What are your initial thoughts when you hear the word ‘Christmas’?
356. Your Christmas shopping list?
357. Favourite Christmas song?
358. Favourite Christmas memory?
359. What does Christmas mean to you now?
360. How was your Christmas?
361. Do you celebrate Boxing day?
362. Would you change anything about this year?
363. List things you’ve learnt this year?
364. What have you achieved this year?
365. What do you want to achieve next year?
366. Things I am looking forward to next year…

I stand behind the idea that you should wait till you’re late 20s to get married, ladies! The average life expectancy is about 80 years old in this day and age. If you get married at say 30 years old, you still have 50 years of married life to look forward to. 50 years is a long time. Why would you rush into that time early? I understand if you feel like you found the one, but why not just date? Get to know each other so you know that it’s right. I promise you, you don’t have to get married early. Just because society is pushing romantic relationships down your throats does not mean you have to throw away the time when you are truly free to do whatever you want. Go travel while you’re still free to have an adventure on your own. Laugh with friends. Have a life outside of romance. That will be the difference between a happy marriage with no regrets and an early divorce with all the regrets in the world.

So, I used to work in a college dining hall, specifically the Kosher Kitchen, where kosher food was made and served for the college’s kosher-keeping Jewish population (which, after my student supervisor graduated my freshman year, consisted of literally just me).

Anyways, in my third year, the Powers That Be decided that each section of the dining hall needed customer reviews. So they distributed little review forms to each kitchen and told us to put them out next to the displays or wherever and tell students to fill them out. Since we didn’t really have the space right up front, we wound up sticking ours a little to the side, on an end-table-looking thing. 

We pretty consistently got 8s and 9s and 10s on the 1-10 rating scale, and nice compliments in the comments section. Our chef was really good at his job (the cornish hens were amazing), and I am a friendly and memorable person (seriously, people who have met me once will recognize me a year later). 

My favorite review was the one that gave us like a 3 or a 5, I don’t remember. It must’ve been while I was taking a bathroom break and my supervisor took over (because we were horrifically short-staffed and my coworker was in the middle of something else that she couldn’t stop doing). The comment section read: “Food was good, but I don’t like the angry little man with the beard.” or something to that effect.

My coworker and I swore to never tell our supervisor, because he is indeed A) short, B) has a beard, and C) horribly anxiety-ridden and terrified of screwing up or making a bad impression. We hid it at the bottom of the stack and made sure he never found it. It was still funny.

Also, that same coworker and I were frequently described as “dinner and a show” because we would get into these theatrical debates and discussions with each other and the guests. One time we sent three people into a fit of giggles because of a two-week-old argument over whether the new disposable gloves were purple or blue. A bunch of our regulars wound up taking sides. We ended up compromising and calling it indigo.

Also, another funny story: On Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, one of the traditional foods is fish heads (“Rosh” means “head”; it’s basically a pun). Anyways, nobody I know actually eats them, but my supervisor insisted on putting out a pair of them on the cold table every year. One day, while my coworker and I were at the front after just finishing with the dinner rush, our supervisor greets us from behind using muppet voices. We turn around and he’s got the fish heads on his hands like sock puppets. I laughed so hard I lost my balance and knocked into the steam table. My coworker gagged and fled, because it turns out she hates the smell of fish. Whoops.

My supervisor also really liked Allen Sherman, a Jewish parody singer from the 50’s. This is pretty obscure, obviously, so he was delighted to discover I had been raised on Allen Sherman. We used to sing the songs together during close and cleanup. We rarely made it to the end of a song without interrupting each other to argue over the lyrics or to discuss a reference. It was a lot of fun.

Both of them were sitting on that bench in the garden.
She said with her half broken teeth, “So, it’s been 50 years to our marriage and we’re still together. Looks like my beauty still enthralls you even today.”
He with his set of half broken teeth replied, “Well, yeah it’s your inner beauty which always enthralled me. Even 50 years back I only married you for that. I knew your inner beauty could hold me for all my life. Physically you look like a piece of old furniture so don’t let that get to your head”, and he laughed out loud.
She joined him and both kept giggling and wished each other on their anniversary.
Anyone looking from far would mistake them for a couple that had just fallen in love.
They looked just so complete together like they didn’t need anybody else to add anything to their lives.
— 

They got old, but their love was still as if new. 

so tonight my parents dragged me to this party of a family friend and I was wearing my my immortal t-shirt (hi, my name is ebony…yes we all know how it goes) and this random 50 ish year old lady I’ve never met asks me “what an interesting shirt…what does it mean?” 

and i stare at her for five panicked, awkward seconds and then I say “thanks, it’s from a book.”

and then (obviously having read my shirt) gives me a pitiful smile and asks “what book?” 

my smile is forced as I say “It’s called my immortal.” 

she nods and says “what’s it about?” 

“…………………………………………………….time travel.” 

“oh, I’ll have to check it out some time” 

I manage to laugh nervously and against my better judgement, I say “okay I hope you like it.”

Freshman Fifteen (18+) Expansion warning

Freshman Fifteen

Georgia R Summers is her name, Georgie for short. She recently graduated top of her class at her high school. She has the supreme setup. 18, blonde, popular, and drop dead gorgeous. R-rated version of a Disney super star. Her family is pretty rich so she didn’t need a full ride, but her grades got her one anyway. Offers from two ivy leagues.

Fast forward one month, 11pm alone in the dorm room at her new college.
“No, yeah, no. Like I get it but literally it makes no sense. Yeah..” She rambled into her iPhone 6s plus. She was laying on her stomach, kicking her legs in her forever 21 yoga pants.

“No, it’s pretty great. I mean, it could be better.”

“Better? A free ride to an Ivy League and you’re trying to complain about something? What could possibly be wrong.” Replied her friend Amy.

“There’s just like, a lot of ugly people on the quad. I swear the people at BHS looked better than they do here.”

“That’s such a bitch thing to say” laughed Amy.

“Shut up, ugly.” Giggled Georgie. “Like, not being mean but I saw a guy who must’ve been 400 pounds. It was gross” scoffed Georgie

“That’ll be you in like a month.” Joked Amy as she crunched down on some microwave popcorn

“What are you talking about? You don’t even have a leg to stand on 145” snapped Georgie passive aggressively.

“Don’t they have like endless buffets there? And like dining halls everywhere. You’ve heard of the Freshman Fifteen right?” asked Amy

“Not really, it sounds dumb.” she replied dismissively while snapchatting herself on her second phone.
“They say that you gain fifteen pounds freshman year of college, considering the way you eat it will probably be 50.” Laughed Amy

“Fuck you, I should go to bed.” Pouted Georgie

“I can’t wait to see you balloon up. You’d be so cute and funny all chubby and soft” daydreamed Amy

“You would like that wouldn’t you, dyke. I’ll talk to you later”
“Byeeee”
*click*

Georgie grabbed the bag of tortilla chips and ginger ale from the kitchen and laid on her bed scrolling through Amazon with her laptop resting on her flat, toned stomach. An hour passed as she looked at random items to waste her dad’s money on. The clock read 12:25, an empty bag of chips on the ground and 4 cans of ginger ale. Her laptop, unbeknownst to her, had risen slightly. She closed her laptop and threw it to the side. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror on the wall.

“Woah.” Georgie gasped.
A little strip of pale white skin was visible at the bottom of her tight black long sleeve. She stood up and inspected her new food baby. From the side, if she pushed the right way it looked like a 4 month baby bump. She rubbed her distended stomach, and looked at herself from various angles. She opened snapchat, pushed out her lips and took a few goofy maternity style pictures. Cradling her stomach from beneath, rolling up her shirt and looking down, staring off into the distance. She added the baby emoji to each one and sent them to Amy, Her boyfriend James, and added it to her story.

James: “Hope it’s not mine ;)”

Georgie laid in bed, playing with her stomach one last time before giving in to sleep.

Next morning, Georgie woke up brushing chip crumbs off of the comforter. She let out a little cute burp, and felt an ache in her stomach. “Ugh, I over did it last night” she hopped out of bed and waddled to the bathroom. She got in the shower, and followed her usual morning routine. She dried herself off and grabbed the north face jacket she planned to wear to her first class of the year. She started pulling the jacket down over her torso and noticed a bit of difficulty, some snagging in places that never happened since she’s owned it. She turned to the side and noticed her stomach was back to around its normal size compared to last night, except a little bit of puff to it in certain areas. She had a little bit of a love handle she never noticed before. She ripped off the jacket, the new chub jiggled for a second. She grabbed the big puffy UNIQLO jacket from the closet and carried on with her day.

Lunch. Georgie met up with a friend from BHS who also got accepted. They went to a local Pho stop just outside campus.
“How’s your dorm?” asked her friend Ruby

“Oh, it’s great. Really great, yeah. Making it into a home now with some decorations my mom and dad gave me.” Smiled Georgie, a sort of cocky sly smile.

“Haha, same.” Replied Ruby while looking at the menu.
“Well, it’s not exactly the same is it? Your parents are, not to intrude or anything, divorced right?” Asked Georgie, a sort of passive aggressive attempt to make Ruby feel less. This was a common tactic of Georgie, using passive aggressive “friendliness” to boost her confidence while lowering that of her peers.

“Yeah, I guess it’s different…Anyway what are you going to get?” Ruby asked, redirecting the conversation.

“I love the Pho here, there are so many great options that I just wanna order everything and eat it all.” Giggled Georgie.

“I think I’m gonna keep it light, it’s never too early to start fighting the Freshman Fifteen am I right?” Ruby joked. Georgie felt her stomach gurgle, a strange warm feeling. She discreetly rubbed her belly, and took a sip of water.

“Oh, gotta be careful saying that one you know? They say that if someone utters the phrase ‘Freshman Fifteen’ they gain 5 pounds! It’s just some old campus joke of course.” Ruby said before taking a sip of her water.
Georgie uncomfortably shifted in her seat.
“Sounds like nonsense to me.” Georgie said while tugging at the bottom of her jacket which was unusually tight.

“Yeah, but who knows. I’m not gonna test it. Summer’s right around the corner and you know how superstitious I am.”
Georgie faked a laugh while hiding her grimace, the sick feeling in her stomach fading away. They ate their food and went their own ways.

The Next Day

It was the end of class, around lunch time. Georgie started walking off campus to the nearest fast food joint. She felt her stomach gurgle and bubble, she assumed it was hunger and began walking faster. She pushed through the doors of the brightly colored restaurant. *ding*

“Order number 12, Laura” droned the unenthusiastic teenager working the counter

College students were bustling through, grabbing their bags of grease and heading back to campus. Georgie got in line waiting to order her food. The grimy teen at the counter leaned into the loudspeaker.

“Attention all students, it is now 6pm. That means it’s time for the deal of the day. Show your student ID and you can take part in the Freshman Fifteen Food Special!”
Georgia felt a jolt in her stomach, a shock that made her automatically clutch her gut. She winced and uncomfortably shuffled forward while covering her stomach with her right arm as the greasy teen yelled next.

“Hello mam, would you like to take part in the Freshman Fifteen food special?” Georgie felt the warmth wash over her again, an audible gurgle sounded through the thick hoodie she was wearing.
“Uh, sorry.” Blushed Georgie.

“Somebody’s hungry…might I interest you in the..” The bored worker picked up a note from the counter and read it out loud “Freshman Fifteen special” the words tumbled out of his mouth like rocks. She winced, instinctively closing one eye as the gurgling in her stomach got louder.

“YES! Whatever, just place the order please” She angrily yelled out to cover the sound of her belly. Georgie placed her ID on the counter.

“Fine…Let’s get you some food to quiet that tummy” he said as if reading it directly off the inside of his eyelids.

“Hey Dan, we need one Freshman Fifteen special over here!” Georgie’s stomach gurgled again, only this time the strange warm feeling seemed to spread. It traveled down her spine and completely engulfed her backside. It felt as if her butt had gone numb from sitting for too long. Her eyes widened in surprise, the wrong day to wear leggings. She wiped sweat from her forehead and spun her backpack around. She heard behind her two guys murmuring. She looked over her shoulder and saw their eyes zoom down and back up to her face before they awkwardly began looking around the room.

“One Freshman Fifteen special coming up.” She felt the warmth intensify like a spark, the gurgling in her stomach not getting any quieter. She quickly unzipped her backpack and pulled out a sweater she brought with her and tied it around her waist to cover up her derriere. Georgie paid for her meal and stepped to the side, leaning against the wall and holding her backpack over her stomach to hide any noticeable changes. She walked to an empty seat, and pulled out her phone.

To: Amy “I don’t know what’s going on but I’ve been having…issues with my body all day. I need some advice or something. Reply quick, bitch.“

*ding* “One Freshman Fifteen special for Georgie, one Freshman Fifteen special for Georgie.”
The jolt surged through her body with double the intensity, causing her to throw her head down onto the table and turn her toes towards each other before letting out a high pitched squeak. It was a strangely pleasurable experience, one she couldn’t believe she was having in public. The warmth had completely covered her ass and belly before it moved it’s way to her chest.
Indignantly, she hopped to her feet and sped to the counter grabbing the bag of food and rushing out the door
“Enjoy!” Smiled the toothy server. She threw some French fries in her mouth as she speed walked back to her dorm.

Georgia accidentally finished the whole bag on the walk back, throwing the trash in the garbage can on the way into her dorm. She went into her bedroom to change and pulled off her hoodie in front of the mirror.

“What the fuck?1” She yelped. Her once flat stomach now protruded out a good inch or two or three. It had a bit of an overhang and blended in with her new love handles. The fat evenly distributed throughout her stomach it looked like an early pregnant woman’s belly or even worse…a chubby girl’s body. Her love handles were prominent, her belly button was even more concave. She froze. She started inspecting her new doughy belly. Spinning around in the mirror.

She noticed her rear end had some changes as well. Her thighs were thicker and soft, the seam of her yoga pants was wedged between her rounded cheeks. She bounced from tippy toe to heel a few times and watched it jiggle up and down. She was in shock, no wonder those boys behind her were talking so much. After grabbing her ass with her right hand and her soft belly with her left for a few minutes, she knew she had to change into something more baggy.
She removed her tank top to change her bra. She immediately noticed that her breasts were overflowing the sides of the cups. The B cup bra couldn’t contain the now C-D cup sized boobs. She couldn’t believe her eyes. She was always slim, toned, and healthy but now she had some curves to her body. Her pale belly was barely flat enough to remain unnoticed under clothing, her ass was rounded and prominent, her tits were bigger and perkier. She couldn’t explain what was happening, but if this is the freshman fifteen you can sign her up. Georgia continued through the week, appreciating her new body, and letting other appreciate it as well.

Next Week.
“Are you ready to see your best friend again?!” Screamed Any into the phone.

“You know it bitch, I’ve made some changes in my life which are pretty exciting.” Said Georgie.

“What, you stopped whoring around and stuffing your face?” giggled Amy.

“Shut up” mumbled Georgie, her eyes fixated on her frame in the mirror.

“What time are you getting here?” Asked Georgie

“Tomorrow morning, we should get breakfast, I heard of a good crepe place.” Said Amy

“Sure, talk to you later.” Georgie hung up the phone and tossed it to the side. She pulled her baggy white t-shirt over her head and threw it into the hamper, she unlatched her new D cup bra and threw it as well. The cold air hit her naked breasts, her nipples became erect. She jogged away from the air conditioner, her whole body bouncing as she went. She grabbed herself a clean sports bra and matching panties. She threw on the bra and attempted to put the panties on one leg at time while crossing the room. Her plump cheeks got caught on the elastic band of the once loose panties. She bounced from one foot to the other, trying to force her fatter ass into her underwear. Her now chubby belly jiggling with each bounce. She lazily flopped onto her bed, flipping through the channels. The batteries in the remote died on a random QVC channel.
“Ugh, typical” she groaned. A woman appeared on the screen, a phone number scrolling at the bottom?
“Are you a college student struggling with their weight?!” screamed the cheesy, coked up Hollywood trainer over the corny techno music.

“Not really” she giggled happily, lightly poking her belly with her fingertips.
“Are you struggling with all the great new food? is the Freshman Fifteen hitting you hard?!” Screamed the model. Georgie’s belly involuntarily jiggled, she felt a sudden warmth in her hands as they rose slightly into the air, like holding a slowly expanding beach ball. It was the first time she witnessed the growth with her own eyes. She felt a pleasurable tingling experience travel from her stomach up her spine to the top of her head and back down to her lower half. She moaned quietly and uncontrollably, slightly arching her back.

“Woah..” she moaned, out of breath. Her heart started racing, adrenaline and endorphins running through her body.
“That wasn’t..the commercial was it?” she thought to herself. Georgie picked up the remote, and tapped the 10 seconds back button. “–Great food? Is the Freshman Fifteen hitting you hard?!” Yelled the trainer once again. Georgie felt the warmth, the growth, and the tingling once more this time only more intense, and more pleasurable. It raced up her spine, and back down focusing around her crotch. She uncontrollably curled her toes and her eyes rolled to the back of her head. She heard the elastic in her sports bra stretch as her body continued to grow. The pleasure was immense, she moaned once more uncontrollably the air forced from her lungs. She arched her back and caught her breath. She watched her belly rise and grow pudgier and pudgier. At least 3 inches added to her waist line right before her eyes. Her breasts were jiggling from side to side within the constraints of her bra as her erect nipples pushed into the fabric. Her thighs had grown thicker. The end cuffs of her underwear were constricting her legs as they grew fatter. Her ass had grown softer and fatter too, lifting her into the air oh so slightly.
“This is insane. This is–..I can’t..I’m too..f-f” she paused, her mouth shivered as a short wave of euphoria rushed over her. She grabbed the remote in her right hand, she slowly ran her fingers directly down her chest, tickling her stomach and lightly teasing the top of her panties contemplating whether it’s worth it or not. She tapped the button once more.
“Is the Freshman Fifteen hitting you hard?!” The feeling was instant and powerful. She yelled out in ecstasy
“OH GOD YES!!” She put her hand down the front of her panties. The warmth ran through her body, tingles all over, with an instant head rush. She was breathing in and out rapidly, intertwined with intense moans. She pleasured herself, she felt herself grow which only made her more horny, the feeling more intense. The expansion wasn’t her main focus, she lost track of what was happening to her because the feeling was too great. She pressed the button again.
“Freshman Fifteen hitting you hard?!” She screamed out in pleasure, quickening her pace. Her legs curled into the air, turning her toes towards each other. Pressure all throughout her body, building, warmth and tingling getting more intense. Louder, faster, bigger. she yelled out once more.
And silence..instant release of all tension..her muscles relaxed and she leaned back dropping the remote. The euphoria cleared and Georgie opened her eyes.

“Oh shit!” Yelled Georgie “I’m huge!” Her belly had rounded out to the point that it was sticking up even while she was laying down. She had folds on her left and right side. Her love handles were more prominent, she caressed her big belly in shock. She was too caught up in the moment. Her boobs had overflowed the bra she was wearing, nearly tearing the straps. She was approaching a perky E cup. She rolled onto her side and looked into the mirror. Her fat ass had torn a hole directly up the seam of her panties exposing her cheeks. She had thunder thighs. A real college age PAWG with a bit more chub. As she stood up she wobbled forward, not used to feeling so heavy. She felt like she weighed a million pounds.

“I have to avoid that goddamn phrase. I’ve gotta stop this from happening. I’m too huge! I’m practically a fat cow!” She cried as she fell to her knees, her whole body jiggling with a thump. She stood up and grabbed her laptop. She had to order a new wardrobe by the time Amy got here, and she couldn’t leave the house looking the way she did. She felt her thighs rub together for the first time in her life. She felt her body bounce and jiggle in new places with each step.

”What am I gonna do? Or say? It’s been one week and I’m already an over inflated blimp..” A tear streamed down her face. Georgie looked across the room to the wall mounted mirror, her hands on her hips.

“I can’t hide this. What do I say, ‘Oh, btw the double F word makes me blow up like a balloon so don’t say it. Wanna go to Bath and Bodyworks?’ It’s hopeless” she pondered while staring at the Amazon homepage.

‘25% off Maternity Wear’ flashed across her screen.

“18 and ordering pregnancy clothes…how embarrassing.”

Next Morning
Georgie was up and dressed an hour early for Amy. She was trying on her new stretchy and loose dress, perfect for hiding any baby bumps..or mounds..or hills..or mountains.
“If she questions my figure..i’ll just throw on some tears and act offended and self conscious. Yeah, it will work. I can do this.” She repeated to herself

“Georgieee!!!” The screech echoed through the parking lot.

“Hey!!” Yelled back Georgie from the curb as Amy did her best to jog to her in high heels.
“Yay!” She squealed as she went in for the hug. Georgie quickly held out her arms and held Amy back by the shoulders. She couldn’t let her feel too much of her. Panicked, she leaned in and did an air kiss awkwardly on each side of her. Complete silence.

“Wow, 7 days at an Ivy League and you’re already pulling that pompous shit” Amy laughed.

“Sorry, there’s a sickness going around campus. Can never be too careful.” Apologized Georgie. She wrapped her arm around Amy’s shoulder and they walked side by side back to the dorm.

“Wow, your arm feels really soft. It used to stab me with your pointy, boney elbows.” Said Amy.

“Wow, how about you make me feel even better about my arms. Really thanks for those awesome comments. How about we talk about my split ends?” Said Georgie faux-offended.

“What are you so worried about you skinny little thing? You’re lucky you don’t have to deal with bingo wings. Well, not yet I guess because we don’t know how Freshman Fifteen will treat you eh?” Georgie stood still, placing her hands on her waist and wincing trying to catch her breathe. An audible gurgle could be heard from her stomach. She felt the same feeling as before only a bit more rapid. Amy didn’t notice and kept walking ahead while talking.

“I know so far that Freshman Fifteen has been hitting my appetite pretty hard. I would never put chocolate on French fries if it weren’t for the magical powers of the Freshman Fifteen.” She rambled. The waves of pleasure hit Georgie once more, stumbling backward as the growth started. She kneeled down to the ground on her tippy toes, her hand holding her in place. “Georgie? Oh my gosh are you okay?!” She said as she ran over, dropping her purse on the ground. She grabbed her and helped her to her feet.

“Do you need to go to the hospital? Is it your stomach again?” Amy rambled in fear.
“I’ll call 911” she said

“No n-n-no…I’m f-fine.” Her voice quivered as she tried to fight off the pleasure in front of her best friend.

“Just, take me back to my dorm, you can go back to your hotel I just need to be alone for a while.” Georgie finally got out as she begins walking.

“What? What?! Are you crazy? I’m staying with you..Let’s go.” They quickly rushed to the dorm, Georgie hiding the sound of her growing belly and body with overly dramatic moans. They entered the dorm room.

“Ok, you lay down. I’ll get some soda from the fridge.” Amy started rifling through the kitchen looking for anything to help.
“I need to change first!” yelled Georgie. She ran to her room and took off the maternity dress. Her stomach had grown bigger, her breasts were testing the limits of her bra. She ran across the living room to grab her big baggy t-shirt while Amy had her back turned in the kitchen. Georgie grabbed the shirt and tried to kick off her shoes, stumbling over her own feet. She fell backwards onto the couch, sitting on the remote.

*click*

A sporty-dressed model appeared on the screen. “–Great food? Is the Freshman Fifteen hitting you hard?” Pleasure rushed over her entire body, she threw her head back and moaned loudly. Amy turned her head to see her best friend nearly naked, twice the size of when she last saw her, on the bed moaning to a Michelle Phipher infomercial.

“What the fuck?!” Yelled Amy as she walked over. Georgie gasped to catch her breath and leaned back onto the couch, watching her body expand. A hissing and gurgling sound could be heard as her stomach rose and widened out, her panties riding up and tightening as her thighs fattened , and her tits were bouncing as they rose and pushed against the bra, her nipples visible through the fabric.

“What..in..the..shit?!” Screamed Amy.

“I didn’t want you seeing me like this.” cried Georgie, her face bright red from embarrassment, she threw her hands over her face and began to quietly sob.

“I didn’t think you’d take me seriously about ballooning up from fresh-”

“STOP! Don’t say that! Now or ever.” Said Georgie looking up at Amy shamefully.

“What?” She asked.

“Because..its, and don’t ask me how or why, but it’s like the trigger word. Every since last week when you said it on the phone I felt weird, then the more people said it the more serious the growth was. And now I’m huge and fat and ugly and hideous an–.” Georgie was cut off by Amy

“Stop that right now georgie!” She yelled as she sat down next to her on the couch slowly. Amy’s eyes scanned up and down her chubby round body. Georgie looked back at her uncomfortably.

“A-Amy? What are you doing?”

“Sorry, I was distracted. So you’re telling me that ‘that’ term whether said by you or someone else causes you to magically gain a few pounds and cum?” Asked Amy.

“It’s like 5 pounds each time now, and I don’t like..finish instantly it’s a build up.” She said indignantly as she blushed.

“….Does it feel good?” Amy asked eagerly

“What?” Georgie was shocked, sitting further up on the couch, her body jiggling.

“Like, is it better than sex?” Amy asked, scooting closer to Georgie

“I mean, it feels..pretty good, no..I mean it feels amazing.. There’s something about just letting yourself grow that’s..WAIT, this is weird, god, why would I tell you this stuff!” Georgie stood up from the couch throwing her hands back up to cover her face, bouncing for half a second.
Amy noticed and stared at Georgie’s fat ass bounce from side to side as she slowly walked away from the couch She bit her lip, mesmerized. Georgie turned back to Amy.

“What am I supposed to do?!” She groaned

“I’m not gonna lie G, you filled out nicely..maybe a bit too full for your liking but not for me… Spin around.” Georgie stared at Amy confused.

“What? No..what do you mean?” She asked timidly

“You know what I mean, spin around real quick.” Amy said sternly, biting her bottom lip

She slowly spun around, and before she knew it Amy slapped Georgie on the ass, watching it bounce up and down.

“Hey!” Georgie covered her backside while stepping away from Amy.

“Oh sweet jesus..” She moaned. Georgie walked to her bedroom closet looking for something to wear.

“It’s bad enough I look like this but now you’re going full on lesbian, it’s too much. I need to put some clothes on it’s too cold!” She yelled from the closet
Amy jogged after her, kicking off her heels. Georgie was facing the clothes on the rack, rummaging through them. Amy stood there, getting a nice long look at her expanded best friend.
Amy placed her hands on Georgie’s hips and slowly backed her out away from the clothes and spun her around. “So..every time someone says–” Amy paused as she pushed Georgie against the wall tracing her belly playfully with one finger. Georgie stood there frozen, catching her breath, looking directly into Amy’s green eyes.
“Freshman Fifteen..” She said slowly and seductively. Georgie shuddered, closing her legs together and falling forward into Amy’s arms. “W-w-what are y-you doing?” Amy held Georgie’s hand lightly and lead her back to the bed. Georgie stood there in front of the bed half naked, looking up to Amy who was a good taller than her. Amy watched from a bird’s eye view as Georgie’s belly rumbled and began to expand. Her boobs weren’t far behind, pushing out over the top of the bra, the creaking of elastic was very audible. Amy held Georgie close, leading her hands down her back until she had her hands on her ass feeling it press out against her palms. Amy leaned in close for a sensual kiss, Georgie was stunned and closed her eyes feeling her best friend’s soft lips against hers.
Suddenly, Amy pushed Georgie back onto the bed. Amy pulled the hair tie out of her ponytail, letting her amber hair fall down against her shoulders. She leaned in resting one knee onto the edge of the bed while she unbuttoned the top few buttons of her shirt.

“God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this..the day you started dating James I’ve never been more disappointed.” She crawled over top of Georgie, slowly forcing her fingers to interlock with hers as she climbed on top. She straddled atop of georgie’s belly, feeling the tension and growth beneath her push against her clit. Amy moaned quietly, taking in a deep breath. Georgie locked eyes with Amy as she leaned in closer to her. Georgie had never been with a girl before, but college is the time of experimentation. And Amy certainly knew her way around the female form. “So this happens..every time I say..Freshman Fifteen?” Amy asked teasingly. “Unghh!!” Georgie yelled out, she bit her bottom lip to stop the moan as she closed her eyes. “Is that true?” Asked Amy a few inches from Georgie’s face, tracing her finger down her neck and over her cleavage. Georgie nodded her head as she opened her eyes.

*Snap*

“Oh?” Amy turned around, looking at the remains of Georgie’s panties laying on the bed.

“You’re getting too big for your own clothes now aren’t you?” Teased Amy. She took her left hand and slide it beneath the torn underwear. Georgie shivered, curling her toes, the feeling was intense. Amy’s warm fingers briefly grazed Georgie’s pussy as she ripped away the remains of the underwear and tossed it off the bed. Her knuckles were white from gripping the bed so hard. Amy turned around on her knees, focusing on Georgie’s pussy. She started to finger her, she moaned out in response. “I’ll be sure to never say..Freshman Fifteen again.”
Georgie shook, the sound of fabric stretching as her bra strained to contain her huge tits. Her belly rose again. Amy felt Georgie’s thighs grow closer together, her pussy lips getting puffier and more sensitive. The pleasure looking for every corner of her body to fill, she kicked her legs and bent her knees. Squirming all over the bed. Her breathing quickened, her moaning slowly got louder and louder, she was getting close. Amy sped up her pace, moving in a circular motion. “oh..Oh…OH” moaned Georgie. “This is the start of a wonderful Freshman Fifteen” whispered Amy.

“But..” Amy whispered as she took her hands off of Georgie. “We aren’t done yet.”
The gurgling of Georgie’s stomach grew louder, her body was entirely warm, her belly began to rise again like an inflating balloon. Amy turned around, placing one leg on each side of georgie as if she was riding a horse. Amy looked down at Georgie with intensity. She began to grind back and forth a top of her. Amy moaned quietly in pleasure. She placed her hands on Georgie’s growing tits, giving them a gentle squeeze while she continued to rock back and forth.The motion made georgie more and more horny, she curled her toes and put her knees together. Amy’s moaning grew louder and louder.

“You’re so beautiful!” Amy screamed while grinding back and forth, feeling herself rise into the air, the warmth of georgie’s belly was incredible. Amy was close, she began to speed up. She leaned her left hand back and found georgie’s pussy with her fingertips once more. She spread her pussy lips and began fingering her. Georgie screamed out in pleasure.

“Together, okay?” Amy said out of breath. Georgie nodded her head, her eyes filled with tears and her cheeks red, she let out a high pitched moan. Amy sped up, grinding back and forth, speeding up the movement of her fingers. Faster and faster. Pressure was building. The elastic of georgie’s clothing was snapping. They quivered, moaning louder and louder. Until they reached climax. Georgie quivered and shook, moaning out and convulsing from pleasure her muscles relaxing. Amy on top hung her head down low, her hair covering her face as she slowly and erratically continued to hump on top of Georgie while her shoulders quivered with pleasure. She let out one last moan before slumping over and falling on top of Georgie. They both caught their breath, and Amy crawled up closer to Georgie and kissed her passionately on the lips.

“That was fun” said Amy as she ran her hand over Georgie’s body and tickled her.

“You’re really pale you know that, you gotta embrace this new body and take it out for the world to see.” Joked Amy.

“I’m gonna get my revenge for this one Amy” Georgie said as she turned on her side to make eye contact with Amy. “We’re gonna have to do something about your frame next. I may not have magical powers or any curses..but I’m gonna make you grow with love and good food. We’ll be the biggest couple on an Ivy League campus.” She nuzzled her head beneath Amy’s chin. “Sure thing..we’ll be the spokesman for the..Freshman Fifteen”

“STOP!!”

“Hehe”


The End

– Inflation Patron
Tell me about your irrational fears and childhood dreams. Tell me about your scars and all the wounds that never seemed to heal inside of you. Tell me why you find comfort in the night sky and why you never walk away from fights. Tell me what you think about when you’re awake at 3 in the morning, and all the what ifs swimming in your head. Tell me what makes you laugh, and what made you cry in the past. Tell me about your first heartbreak and your last try at love. Tell me about your mother’s laugh, and the food she cooks for you. Tell me about your first fight with your father, and the first time you saw him cry. Tell me about the 5-year-old you were, and the 50-year-old you want to be. Don’t tell me your favorite color, tell me why it is. Don’t tell me where you grew up, tell me what it was like growing up there. Don’t tell me about yourself, tell me who you are. That’s the conversation I want to have and the things I want to hear.
—  a. gale, Can’t we skip the awkward small talk and dive down into the depths?
fanon vs canon
  • junkrat fanon: i😍😍 love 😳me some DICK give me 😫DICK!!! I AM SO GAY!!
  • junkrat canon: EXPLOSIONS *LAUGHS* EXPLOSIONS
  • lucio fanon: im tall and will hit on ur girl/guy B^)
  • lucio canon: im short as hell and like music B)^
  • roadhog fanon: I HAVE A BIG DICK!!!!
  • roadhog canon: i have like no personality
  • pharah fanon: im muscular
  • pharah canon: im not even muscualr and the next thing to my personality is puns
  • mei fanon: im totally in a relationship with zarya bcuz why not!! im also totally fat, and not skinny at all!!! cause?? skinny girls are SO sexist
  • mei canon: i was frozen for like 50 years and im a scientist! im skinny and i just wear a thicc suit
  • reaper/soldier fanon: i love my husband and my sons!!!
  • reaper/soldier canon: i hate reaper (or soldier) and not in a fucking relationship with him, and genji or mccree arent my damn sons
  • symettryra fanon: futa
  • sym canon: Me, an intellectual
The boys discussing TV spoilers (Rajigaze 3/31)

Reita (reading mail): “Please evaluate my Dark Side. I’m the type to read some spoilers before watching a series or reading a novel, but the other day my friend was like, “that’s unbelievable! you won’t [watch/read] if something you don’t like happens? That’s so self-centred!” I thought reading spoilers was a thing so that people could avoid [seeing/reading] something they didn’t like, but do people not actually do that? Is this my Dark Side? Are you guys the type who don’t tolerate spoilers?”

Aoi: A while ago I was talking to someone about Taiga (this historical drama that’s been on TV for like 50 years) like, “oh so-and-so died…” and they got so mad at me, like, “stop spoiling!”

Uruha: (laughing) But it’s Taiga………..

Aoi: Right? Like, it actually happened, what u want me to do…it’s Taiga…

(*the drama is based off of real ppl/events in history so i guess it was no secret this person died) 

Reita and Kai catching on finally: AHH cause it’s historical ahh yeah ok!! Ahh yes (laughing)

Kai: Totally!

Reita: I mean, it’s historical!

Aoi: Yeah.

(Uruha chucklin)

Aoi: Like am I not even allowed to talk about that? 

Reita: Right, like, ur literally just stating a fact?

Aoi: Right right right

Ruki: The “type to read spoilers before watching a series or reading a drama”….what?

Reita: That’s totally not a thing

Kai: That’s not a “type”

(gigglin) 

Ruki: Hmmm…..they’re not thinking about the writer’s intention at all.

Reita: There’s no surprises!

Aoi: But don’t you sometimes watch a movie even after you’ve read the novel? 

Reita: Ahh yeah if it was good!

Aoi: So it’s kinda like that no?

Ruki: But like, they must go online first and read something that says like “spoiler alert”

Aoi and Reita: Ahhhhh

Reita: Yeah that’s weird…

Ruki: Well yeah that’s why it’s a “Dark Side.” 

Reita: Ah.

Aoi: Right.

Ruki: Like manga, for example, when there’s an original work…like Ushijima and stuff (It’s this manga that they made into a movie???) it’s not like you read a spoiler, it’s like…you know the original work, and you’re seeing how well they were able to reproduce it. 

Aoi: Mmm

Ruki: But this person….they’re just reading spoilers…….this……….IS NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!

(everyone especially reita dying) 

Reita: It’s scary, like, some of us are watching the same foreign dramas, and we’re all at different parts, right?

Ruki: Yeah but like even if someone spoils it we just forget about it and watch anyway

(everyone laughing) 

Uruha: Yeah like if we’re talking about 24, and you’re talking about something that happened around season 2 idk shit

Reita: Cause you literally don’t remember anything? 

Uruha: Yep.

Ruki: Well that would have happened so long ago, it was season 2

Uruha: And if someone’s [talking about it] like, “that was crazy eh!?” I’m just like .. ……. :-)

Kai: (laughing) Even tho u were telling everyone to watch it

Reita: But man I’m so scared of spoilers like, I’m like “stop talking about it stop talking about it” u know?

Aoi: Yeah totally……

Reita: Yeah…espECIALLY to KAI. 

Kai: Me!?

Reita: It’s always you!!!

Kai: It’s YOU!!!

Reita: No the fuck it;S NOT !!!!

Ruki: Also you lie.

Reita: What?

Ruki: You lie about the ending.

Reita: W-what are you talking about (laughing) 

(Idk wtf happens in this movie but it’s some shit called “Blown Away”?? and Reita told Ruki some shit explodes in the end but I guess it didn’t?????) 

Ruki: I was like, “man even though I know how it ends now that’s gonna be so good!” But that’s not what happened at all! Shit did not explode!

Uruha: What were u watching?

Reita: Blown, away, I think. ….Pls watch it.

(everyone giggling) 

Reita: So, anyone watching dramas lately?

(silence)

Reita: Foreign dramas…Anything….

(silence)

Kai: I know one of y’all is watching something………

Uruha: Dramas? Well…Walking Dead got boring –

Ruki: Oh good!!!!!!! Then let’s watch [idk what he said but I guess he been tryna get ppl to watch it cause he JUMPED on this opportunity]

Reita: There’s no way we’re watching that

Ruki: No I actually watched a bit during recording recently! About an hour.

Reita: Oh yeah?

Ruki: Yeh…but it’s kinda awkward to show people…cause you can’t tell if they’re enjoying it

Say You Won’t Let Go - Harry Styles Imagine

*Based on Say You Won’t Let go by James Arthur.

There has never been a time in your life where Harry Styles wasn’t your best friend. Your mothers were best friends and lived on the same street. You and Harry were born only a few days apart, which meant that you two shared many birthday parties together. You did everything together from when you were born till you were teenagers. 

When Harry made it to the X Factor that was the first time that you two were apart. Then, he never really came back home again. He was suddenly this mega superstar traveling all over the world, while you were back home going to University. 

Even though the two of you were always apart for most of the time, you still were extremely close. You always texted or talked on the phone and at least a few times a week, you two would video chat. In fact, there were a few times when relationships of his didn’t work out because he always made time to talk to you, instead of them. 

There were times that you went on tour for a few weeks with him over the years, and you would spend time with him when he was off. But now, that he wasn’t touring anymore and he had a little more free time, you were able to spend more time with him. 

You were out in London with a group of mutual friends and you were having the time of your live. You and Harry were dancing around like crazy and downing some drinks to the point where you were definitely getting drunk. 

It was getting quite late, so Harry and you decided to leave and head over to Harry’s house. After the ride home, you weren’t feeling very well. Harry carried you inside and up to his bedroom. He handed you some of his clothes and you changed into them. You felt a lurch in your stomach, so you ran into the bathroom. 

Harry followed you and held your hair back and rubbed your back as the effects of the alcohol was leaving your system into the toilet. He then got a damp rag and handed it to you. 

“I’m so sorry.” You laugh. “I’m sure this is not how you wanted to end this night.” 

He shrugs. “It’s not the first time, I’ve had to hold your hair back while you got sick.” He says. 

You laugh leaning back against him. He smiles wrapping his arms around you. “You should get some rest. You can have my bed. I’ll sleep in the guest room.” He whispers. 

“No, stay…” You whisper back. 

He sighs picking you up and carrying you into the room. He lays you in the bed and then gets you some water and aspirin. “Okay, now it’s time to get some sleep.” He says

“Yeah, yeah.” You say scooting closer to him on the bed. 

He kisses your head and wraps his arms around you. It didn’t take long before you feel asleep, however, Harry was a different story. He looked down at you sleeping and felt the butterflies in his stomach again. 

He loved you… 

No.

He was IN love you. 

He knew this and wanted to tell you, but he was afraid. He was scared of you not feeling the same way. He didn’t want to lose you as his best friend, even if that meant he could never be more than that. 

But little did he know, that you felt the same way.

**

A Year Later. 

Harry was standing at the alter, surrounded by his best mates, in front of both of your friends and families. He was nervous and his palms were sweaty. He was fiddling with the rings on his finger as he waited for you to make your appearance. 

His mom and sister were already bawling their eyes out and he was trying to hold his in. 

Then, everyone stood up. 

Harry looked down the aisle and saw you standing there in the most beautiful dress next to your father. The smile on his face had never been bigger and the tears were now filling his eyes on the verge of spilling over. 

As you walked down the aisle, you didn’t notice the flowers or who was there. All you were focused on was Harry and as soon as you saw him and the smile on his face, you lost control over your tears. 

Good thing for waterproof makeup. 

Harry grabbed your hand when you finally were at the alter. You squeezed his hand and he brought yours up to kiss it. 

“Y/N and Harry have decided to share their own vows to one another,” the minster says. “Harry, you may go first.” 

Harry sniffles and takes out a piece of paper from his pocket. “Y/N, baby, you’ve been in my life for as long as I can remember. You’ve been my side for everything. You’ve been my neighbor, my best friend, my first kiss, my first love, my girlfriend, my fiancé, and now you’ll be my wife and one day, the mother of my children. I’m so in love with you and I have been for years, but I was so scared to tell you how I felt, until one night, when you looked at me and I just knew that I had to tell you. And luckily you felt the same way, which brought us here today. I vow to love you whole heartedly until we’re gray and old. I promise to bring you breakfast in bed and take our kids to school. You look as beautiful as ever and I swear you only get better with each passing day. I’m so in love with you and I hope that you know and I think my lucky stars for that night.” He sniffles looking at you. 

You sniffle and wipe at your eyes before taking your paper out. “Okay.” You breathe out trying to get your composure. “We were little we were always together. We were teenagers we were always together until we weren’t. When you left to pursue your dream, It was bittersweet. I was so proud of you for going and I knew that you would do great things, but I was nervous about losing you. However, you made sure that didn’t happen. Even if we weren’t physically together, we were still by each other’s side. With every text and phone call, our friendship lasted and grew into something more. I have always loved you, but it wasn’t until a few years ago that I realized I was in love you. That you were the one that I wanted to grow old with. The one that I wanted to make a family with. And while I knew that we would be together, I never imagined it would be like this and I couldn’t be happier. I’m so thankful that I was able to overcome by fear of rejection and losing you to tell you how I felt about you and how ecstatic I was when you said that you felt the same. We’ve already spent our whole lives together and I can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives and more together. I love you more than anything and I hope you know.” You sniffle. 

Harry then puts the ring on your finger and you place his ring on his finger. 

“I know pronounce you husband and wife… Harry you may now kiss your bride.” 

Harry smiles and puts his hands on your cheeks before kissing you. You smile into the kiss wrapping your arms around him. You both pull away putting your foreheads together, just enjoying the moment. 

**

Two Years Later. 

The sound of a crying baby filled the air as Harry got up from the bed. He was a new father of all of week and the sleep deprivation was setting in, but he didn’t care. Whenever he held his baby girl in his arms, he was instantly awake. 

He picked her up and held her to his chest as he walked downstairs to get a bottle. He looked down at her as he fed her and he smiled knowing that she looked just her mother. He knew that he loved her as she was growing inside your belly, but as soon as he saw you in her, he loved her even more. 

And just when he thought he couldn’t love you anymore than he already did, knowing that you were the mother of his beautiful daughter, instantly made his love grow even more for you. 

You had woken up when you felt Harry leaving the bed. You went downstairs and watched him looking at your daughter. you heart swelled, something it always did when you saw Harry being a father. You were so lucky to have this man who loved you more than anything and would be the most amazing father to your children. 

And to think, if it wasn’t for that night, you may not be here. 

**

50 Years Later.

You and Harry were outside in the backyard of your house in Holmes Chapel. You were drinking some tea and Harry was sitting next to you, with his arm around your shoulder. There was giggles and chattering coming from all over the place. 

Harry laughed. “Remember when that was us, love?” He asked. “Now, our grandchildren are the ones running around here.” 

“Yeah, I feel like it was just a few years ago, that it was us and then our kids.” You whisper. 

“I know what you mean.” He smiles kissing your head. 

“I love you.” You whisper laying your head on his shoulder. 

“And I love you, baby.” He smiles. “I’ve loved you for almost 73 years of my life.” 

He kissed your head and the two of you go back to watching your grandchildren laughing and playing around in the backyard. You two had been married for 52 years and you were still going strong. 

And to think, it was all because of that one night. 

Like Lightening

Requested by: Anonymous
(Here are the specifics)

Pairing: Reader x Bucky
Word Count: 846
Warnings: Fluff

A/N: Based off Powerful by Major Lazer and Ellie Goulding. Sorry this took so long to write and post!

Groaning, you rub your palm against your burning eyes. Your head was pounding and you knew that you weren’t going to get anything done today; this was an all day hangover.

“Ugh, I’m never drinking again,” you groan,

“Tell me about it,” you freeze as your sluggish brain starts to panic. You knew that voice, it was Bucky’s. Rolling over, your breath hitches in your throat as your eyes rake down Bucky’s naked body,

“Oh god!” you squeal, grabbing the sheets and yanking them up to your chin,

“Shit,” Bucky whispers as his ice blue eyes meet yours. You can’t tear your eyes away from his bare chest, and it takes everything in you not too let your eyes drift any further down,

Keep reading

Limericks and dares

Originally posted by sam-and-dean-winchesters

You stared at him with an unflinching confidence. Sitting in a chair at one side of the table with your palms pressed down on top, your hair swept over your shoulder and face as stern as a pissed off headteacher.
Sam stared back, mirroring your position. 

“You only have three lives and then you lose.” you stated. 

“I know, I won’t need them. This is my area of expertise, darling.” he smirked.

Smug bastard you thought. 

Castiel and Dean sat side-by-side on the end of the table between the both of you, their gazes bouncing back and forth as you took turns to speak. They had placed bets on who would win and who would lose. Dean had put $50 on you winning, but Cas had said he ‘had faith’ that Sam would prevail. 

You scoffed. “Well, sweetling,” you leaned forward and brought your hand up to cup your mouth and whispered loudly, “you might want to find something else to excel at, else you might just be left with your deflated ego and a red face.” he narrowed his eyes at you. You grinned and sat back in your chair, lowering your hand to the table once again. 

“Fine, no lives. You crack, you’re over.” You dramatically drug a finger across your neck to illustrate and he gave you a bitchy smile. 

You started to list off the rules whilst directing your gaze at the persons most likely to break them. “No audience participation, no touching, no commenting on persons involved. We take turns, no interrupting, no criticising, and absolutely NO laughing. First person to laugh loses. Winner gets the beer.” 

See, this whole debacle was about the last beer in the bunker that now sat in the middle of the table, awaiting to be drained by the victor. It had been chilled and poured into a straight pint glass, the shining golden colour full of tiny rising bubbles and a clean white head looked like the most tempting thing in the world. 
Dean had refused to go out and get some more from the shops as it was pouring down with rain and had been for the past week. Another reason being was that he had managed to snatch the second to last one, leaving you and Sam standing there empty handed and staring at the lone bottle in the fridge. Dean sat there with his beer bottle clutched in his hand as he leant over the back of his chair which he had flipped around to sit more comfortably. Cas sat properly next to him in his own chair, hands folded in his lap. 

It was Cas that had suggested the competition to everyone’s shock. Apparently him and Gabriel had previously used this tactic to solve their own personal arguments, and although you were sure Cas didn’t appreciate the concept as much as Gabriel, it definitely would have been a sight to see. 

Sam’s hair swished against his jaw as nodded in agreement to your terms, and then he cleared his throat. 

“There was a young man from Brighton
Who thought he’d at last found a tight ‘un.
He said, “Oh my love,
It fits like a glove.”
Said she, “But you’re not in the right ‘un.”” 

The two meerkats next to you swivelled their heads around to see your reaction. You stayed utterly still. Your face never betraying any of the emotions that you had to mentally beat down with a bat to keep at bay. You were a pro, but the look on Sam’s face in contrast to the dirty words spilling from his lips was almost enough to make your crack.
Your turn. 

“There once was a man from madras
Whose balls were made of brass
In stormy weather
They clang together
And sparks fly out of his ass!” 

Poker face. He didn’t even blink, and it looked like he wasn’t even breathing. He took a few seconds before he opened his mouth. 

“There once was a man from Bel Air
Who was doing his wife on the stair
But the banister broke
So he doubled his stroke
And finished her off in mid-air.” 

You pressed your lips together tightly and narrowed your eyes a little.

You little fucker.

You would not break. Your will was an impenetrable wall and your face was steel. If you were going to have anything with your life, you would have this. You just had to play dirtier. After relaxing your face, you began again. 

“There once was a girl named McGill
Who used dynamite sticks for a thrill
They found her vagina
In South Carolina
And bits of her tits in Brazil.” 

Dean covered an abrupt laugh with a cough and covered his mouth with a closed fist whereas Castiel only seemed to recognise the limerick and nodded along.
Sam’s eyes had widened, almost imperceptibly, but you saw it. His adam’s apple bobbed and your heart leapt to your throat. He was going to lose. You were so close, you just had to keep hacking at his defences. He must have seen the light in your eyes, because his fingers started to grip the table slightly. He breathed out of his nose harshly, his shoulders moving with the action and his eyes bored into you. 

“There once was a barmaid named Gale
On whose breasts was the menu for ale
But since she was kind
For the sake of the blind
On her ass it was printed in Braille.” 

Dean had to bite the fist still at his mouth to try and keep quiet, but you all heard as he let out a distorted squeak, his eyes alight with childish glee. Your chest constricted and you couldn’t quite tame your lips enough to stop the corners of them from turning up a smidge. Sam’s eyes locked onto the movement and when he brought them back up to yours, it was obvious he thought he was going to win. You breathed in deeply and let a wave of calmness wash over your face.

Time to pull out the big guns.

“A young escape artist by the name of Sweeny.
His girl was a bit of a meany.
At the hatch of her snatch.
She had a catch that would latch.
And she could only be fucked by Houdini.” 

Dean couldn’t hold in his laughter anymore as it burst from his lips and flung him backwards, almost tipping him off the back of his chair and spilling his drink. Castiel simply looked over at him in confusion, obviously contemplating how it was physically possible to have a ‘latch’ on your ‘catch’.
First of all he had to figure out what a ‘catch’ was.
He would ask Dean later. 

The combination of your words, Dean’s outburst and Castiel’s lost face had Sam lightly snorting.
His eyes widened and his large hand slapped over his mouth. 

Your smile was positively glowing.
His eyes closed in defeat and his shoulders slumped. 

 “HAHA! LOSER!” 

You picked up the glass and proceeded to take a big gulp of the coveted beer. Sam pathetically watched your throat bob as you swallowed down half a pint then smacked the glass back on the table with a loud and satisfied groan. He slapped his hand on the table in outrage making the glass clatter against the wood.
Your other hand shot to the the pint to stop it from moving.
“Hey!” you snapped.
“Damn it!” he slapped his hand down again.
“Awh, c’mon Sammy! Don’t be a sore loser. She beat you fair and square, man. Hell, she’s got a dirtier mouth than me, you did well to last as long as you did.” Dean patted Sam on the shoulder, snickering at his innuendo.
Sam whacked his hand away and pointed at Dean accusingly. “I would have won if you hadn’t been giggling like a 13 year old over there with Mr. Clueless.” Sam flung a hand at Cas who sat looking innocent as ever. 

“I wasn't giggling.” Cas said snidely. “You laughed, therefore you lost. And now I owe Dean $50.”
Dean grinned over at Cas and held his hand out to receive his prize.
“I don’t carry cash.” Cas stated.
Dean’s hand dropped against his knee. He looked away and shook his head with an unsurprised face. “Figures.” 

“I’m willing to make a trade, Samuel.” You suddenly said, the pint glass still half full in your hands.
His eyes snapped to you. “What do you want?” 

You tapped your fingers against the glass in a quick rhythm and you tilted your head to the side, looking to the corner of the room as you contemplated how far Sam was willing to be pushed. 

“In fact, let’s make it a dare.” 

Dean practically jumped up and down in his seat all giddy. Sam lifted his chin and showed no fear. “Name it.” 

“Dean, can I borrow your phone for a second please?” you held out your hand to the side without looking over. Dean dug into his back pocket and deposited his phone into your hand. You scrolled through the contacts until you got to a certain name. Putting the phone on loudspeaker you set it on the table in front of Sam as it started to ring. 

“Tell him you have a big crush on him. And that you think about him in the shower.”
Deans head was about to spin off if he swung it any faster, his mouth had dropped open and he waited for Sam’s response.
Sam’s face had scrunched up in confusion. “Tell who?” 

“Hello squirrel, bit busy at the moment. Can this wait?” Crowleys voice echoed into the room, along with a painful scream in the background that was cut off with a loud slam of a heavy metal door. 

Sam almost choked on his own spit. He threw his hand up and looked at you with a ‘WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME DO THIS’ face. 

“Dean?” Crowley questioned.
You pressed your fingers to your smile and pointed to the phone with your other hand. ‘He’s waiting, loverboy.’ You mouthed back to Sam.
Sam rolled his eyes, dug his fingers into his forehead which disturbed his hair, and breathed out a sigh as he started to talk. “Uh-uh, it’s not Dean. It’s Sam.” 

“Moose? Why have you got Dean’s phone? Has he gotten into trouble again?” 

“No, no listen. I uh- I have something I need to tell you.”
Sam made the mistake of looking over at Dean, who had tears streaming down his pink face as he held in laughter. Sam punched him hard in the arm. 

‘Ow!’ Dean mouthed and gestured to Sam whilst looking at you and Cas like he was out of line. Cas rubbed Dean’s arm thinking he was actually hurt, causing Dean to give him a flat look.
You hiccuped trying to stop yourself from cracking up, your shoulders shaking from the strain. 

“Well go on then, I haven’t got all bloody day! Speak!” 

If looks could kill, Sam would have pulverized you 10 times over. You kicked him in the shin to prompt him. 

“I HAVE A REALLY BIG CRUSH ON YOU AND I THINK ABOUT YOU IN THE SHOWER WHEN I TOUCH MYSELF.” 

The room was silent. If this were the place for a tumbleweed to slowly roll past, it would be careening behind Sam right now. Everyone stared at the phone with bated breath, waiting for Crowley to say something. 

“What?” Crowley’s hesitant voice rumbled out of the speaker. 

“I uh- I-I-” Sam stuttered. 

“No, don’t say it again!” and then Crowley was suddenly in the room, smacking Sam repeatedly over the head with a cloth covered in spots of dried blood.
“You can’t talk to the King of Hell like that, you bloody imbecile! My demons heard you say that! THEY HEARD YOU, SAMUEL!” 

Sam raised his arms to shelter his face from the attack, Dean had dissolved into a giggling mess leaning his arm on an amused Cas, and you were cackling like a witch with wet cheeks. 

“IT WAS A DARE CROWLEY I DIDN’T MEAN IT WILL YOU STOP HITTING ME!” Crowley paused his attack and looked at Sam with an incredulous look. 

“WHAT?!” 

“It-it” you had to try and breathe for a second before you could cut in, “it was me!” you told Crowley. 

You dared him to ring me up, and shout down the phone so all my loyal subjects could hear that he thinks about me when he’s getting cosy with himself in the shower!?” Crowley spat at you. 

You sputtered out a snort and then cracked up again, nodding as much as you could as you lost control. Crowley turned to Sam to see him sitting with his arms crossed, a sour look on his face.
“And what do you get out of this?” he questioned and jabbed a finger into Sam’s shoulder. 

Sam reached forward and placed the glass to his lips, drinking down the rest of the pint. He looked up at Crowley when he finished. “Half a beer.” 

Crowley’s eyes were murderous for a split second before he closed them. When he opened them again he smiled disarmingly. “Well I hope it was worth it, Moose. I’ll be seeing you in your dreams.” He tapped Sam on the cheek before he disappeared. 

Sam turned to look at you with his jaw on the ground. Cas spoke up. “Did he mean that he was going to visit you in your dreams? Why would he want to do that?” his eyebrows drew together and he looked at each of you for an answer. Dean slung an arm over his shoulder and held up his beer. “Sometimes Cassie, when you tell a boy you like him, he might not say it back, but might show you how he feels in different ways.” He jerked his beer in Sam’s direction and nodded jeeringly. 

 Sam smacked the beer out of his hand and it crashed to the floor, liquid spilling out on the wood. You opened your mouth and watched as Dean stared down at the mess.
He faced Sam with thinly veiled fury in his eyes.
“Bitch.”
“Jerk.” Sam shot back. 

“Ookaayyy! Now we’re officially out of beer, I say we start on the whiskey.” You suggested, rising to go towards the trolley of glassware.
“I’m gonna get you back for this, Y/N. I want a rematch.” Sam turned around in his seat and pointed at you as you poured 4 glasses of whiskey out. Gripping two glasses between your pinched fingers in each hand you slid the glasses to each of them and sat back down. 

“Try it, Sammy. Just think about what you’re willing to give up next time. I might not be so nice.” You gave him a feline smirk as you sipped the whiskey. The promise in Sam’s eyes was enough to make you long for the next rainy day. 


A/N: The Sherlock fic is on its way, I just couldn’t get this out of my head! 

Tag list:@chrisevansthedoritobastard
@i-want-to-believe-x
@anxuanpham
@wantingtobekorra
@calciumcow

huntress-earthtwo  asked:

Ok! So hc time! When Eliza finally died, Alexander waiting for her on the other side, maybe like helpless age. And he just kisses her and hugs her then, 'Damnit Eliza!' And she is very confused, 'When I said to you to take your time, I didn't need 50 years! God I missed you so much, we missed you so much.'

She just kisses him, and laughs quietly, ‘I missed you too,’ She starts crying and he starts crying, 'Hey, I’m proud of you. I really am. You’ve accomplished so much, Betsy. You’ve change the world, you’ve made it better. I’m so happy i even got the chance to meet you. I love you, okay? I love so fucking much.’ Then eliza goes, 'i love you too.’ 'Hey let’s go.’ 'Where?’ 'Lets go home. Lets see our family. Ok now i need fanart of this send help.

_______________________

everyone is crying

including me

😊Fanfic (Grayson x Reader)

Summary: Can you do an imagine (grayson x reader) where grayson finds out that reader use to write fanfics about him and Ethan? And maybe they read some for a video. think it would be pretty funny.

Warnings: None

A/N: Gurrrrrlllll I love me some fanfics! I’m sorry if this isn’t what you wanted, but I gave it a shot and I hope you guys like it <3 Requests are open!

Originally posted by thedolangifs

“Okay guys so we’ve done dirty fanficton, reading dirty comments, and now we are going to read just fanfiction, but not just any fanfiction. We have recently learned that Y/N used to write fan fiction.” I could feel my entire soul being pulled from my body. Recently the boys found out I have a tumblr account and asked if I ever wrote about them. Of course I said ‘No!’ But they googled my name and my tumblr was in the few first results. I was sitting in class earlier this week when Gray texted me.

Grayson😊💚: Girl we have a great idea for this week’s video ;)

I did not expect the video would be over my stories over the boys. All they did was made me sit here and watch them read my stories aloud.

“Okay so this one is called Star Crossed Lovers E.D oooo this one’s about me.” Ethan scrolls through his phone while Gray looks over his shoulder.

“Find something juicy E.” Grayson says when he looks up to me. “Y/N where’s the juicy stuff?” Grayson asks which makes me laugh.

“You won’t find anything juicy. I never finished these fics after I met you guys.” I lied. I actually wrote a little bit of juice in the Ethan one but my Grayson one I’m worried they’ll find. It was like 50 Shades mixed with Twilight and it was pretty cringe worthy.

“Ugh Y/N why are you terrible?” Ethan asks as he keeps scrolling.

“Now for those of you guys who don’t know, we met Y/N at Coachella this year. She said she was a fan of us and we thought she was pretty cool. We exchanged snaps and soon we all became really good friends. Found out she lived in the LA area and well here we are.” Grayson says looking to me and smiling. Grayson and I have had a little relationship going on too. Since Coachella we’ve had a snapstreak and he was always my last message before bed. Neither one of us has ever said anything about whatever we had being official, but that didn’t matter because I knew the feelings were there.

“Ah here’s something!” Ethan exclaims. Grayson breaks our contact and turns to Ethan. “‘Ethan what are you doing?’ Molly asked as the giant man pressed her against the wall. ‘What I want to do.’ Just then his gigantic hands pressed my small body against the wall while he kissed me. His lips tasted of cigarettes and mint. A concoction I never thought I would fall in love with.” Ethan and Grayson are in a spit of laughter while I’m trying to hide my embarrassment. Grayson starts coughing from laughing so hard which makes E and I start laughing too. “Wait wait there’s more. ‘I feel Ethan’s hard on press against my shin. He was so big.’” The boy laugh even harder and Grayson even falls out of his chair. I cover my face and cringe so hard. “Y/N gave me a mega dick.” Ethan then looks down at his crotch. “I mean it’s pretty big but not down to your shin.” Ethan then starts laughing again.

“I was 13 give me a break!” I defended and both the boys laughed.

“Oh I found the one about me! It’s called Feels Right GD. Here we go ladies and gentlemen.” Grayson shoots me a wink and starts reading. “Day in and day out it was the same thing. He would call me at 1am wanting me to come over. I always went to his house. Sneaking past his brother who would fall asleep on the couch to go to his room. I was married but he didn’t care. ‘Callie….’ He moaned to me as I softly kissed his neck. This wasn’t who I was meant to be but damn I loved this. I loved the way his fingers would–and that’s enough of that!” Grayson says laughing.

“No keep reading!” Ethan takes the phone from Grayson after we both attempt to protest. “‘Grayson I can feel you hardening against me. I love this, but why do I feel so bad? This is wrong.’ I said as I grinded against Grayson softly. ‘It may be wrong, but it feels so right. I want you to–We are not going to flag this video!” Ethan shouts while Grayson and I both cover our face laughing.

“My girlfriend’s writing is so cute I swear.” As soon as he said what he said he realized what he said. We both popped our heads up in shock and I see Ethan staring us down.

“Excuse me? Girlfriend? What?” Ethan asks us the 40 questions we had been trying to avoid. Ethan gets up and turns the camera off. “How long?”

Grayson and I both exchange looks. “Well I didn’t know we were official until he said that, but we’ve kinda been talking since Coachella.” I answered and Grayson looks at me.

“I just assumed with all the talking that we were official. I mean we didn’t tell anyone about us in order to avoid rumors and questions.” Grayson looks up to Ethan then back to me. “But if it isn’t too much trouble, would you want to be my girlfriend?” He asks making me smile.

“I don’t know. I mean Ethan’s dick touches me shin. That’s pretty impressive.” I said referring to the fanfiction they read which caused everyone to laugh.

“Yeah but my fingers do things just the way you like. Even if it’s so wrong.” Grayson says trying to be seductive which caused me to crack a smile.

“Hey you two I’m going to not listen to that. I’m happy you guys are together but when do you plan to tell the fans? I mean I can edit it out of the video, but then we don’t have much of a video.” Ethan says eyeing the camera.

“Let’s finish reading the fanfics and we can decide. I want to read the The Right Choice one about E and I.” Grayson says and I look to my feet.

“It’s a messy love triangle I will not deny that.” I said which made Grayson smile. “But obviously I made my choice.” I said standing to my feet and walking over to Gray and giving him a kiss on the cheek.

“The right choice.” He corrects me. I rolled my eyes as Ethan started rolling the camera again.

“You guys stop being gross. I think we both know I’m the only choice.” Ethan says flexing his muscles. Grayson just laughs while rolling his eyes.

“Let’s see what this one is about. Obviously I won so I mean I know how it ends.” Grayson says laughing while Ethan playfully pushes him. He looks to me and blows me a kiss which I just rolled my eyes.

“Stop being such a dork.” Ethan says making me laugh. 

“Dork with a girl.” He says which made me blush. “A cute girl.”

kerfundlesnachle  asked:

Every champion knows mipha likes link and keeps hinting it to his oblivious ass but he doesn't fucking catch on and everyone is both amused and frustrated and the whole while mipha is like "guys please I'm gonna have a heart attack if y'all don't stahp"

Im on it! ~skeleton

Revali

-is part of the frustrated team

-LOG U DUMBASS OMG

-like what a moron i cannot believe

-”Hey elf boy tell me when you finally get your head outta ass and see the real world”

Daruk

-#team amused

-”you know little guy mipha really likes you” “of course we’re good friends” Laughs for 50 years (mipha just puts her face in her hands “why”)

Urbosa

-#team amused

-”for such a mighty warrior you are rather short sighted link”

-”Mipha perphaps you should not pursue such a dense voe” she says while link and mipha are both standing there (mipha mentally screeching in the background )

Zelda

-#team frustrated

-is this idiot really the hero of courage?

-gives mipha looks of sympathy often

(BMC/Hamilton) Satisfied, Song Parody

Parody: Satisfied
Actual Song: Satisfied
By: Hamilton

QUICK NOTES:
- I’ve skipped straight to Angelica’s rap, and cut out the whole ‘Hamilton Meets Eliza, Cue Angelica’s 13 Reasons Why’ parts because I’m an inconsistent lizard
-The rapping was sO HARD TO DO so I’m sorry if it doesn’t fit completely with the original
-Honestly this whole thing was hard to do—I feel dead inside
- This takes place a while after Michael is blocked out in ‘Upgrade’

~*~

(MICHAEL)
Rewind, rewind, rewind…
I remember that day
How could I not
It happened like an hour ago
I remember his face, his clothes
And of course his back as he turned to go
I remember me pulling my hoodie up and bumping into people there

But Jeremy, god!
You said we’d always be a pair…

In the world, we’d fare
Yet here you are now, acting like I’m mind impaired
And now that you’re gone
My only thought is how I’m scared

Jer, I thought you cared
Yeah, I thought you cared
Guess you never cared

(PAST-JEREMY)
Hey, I’m Jer…
I mean my name is Jeremy

(PAST-MICHAEL)
Cool, my name’s Michael
Which grade are you gonna be in this year?

(PAST-JEREMY)
In grade 1
Wait, do I look older though?

(PAST-MICHAEL)
Well, kind of—

(PAST-JEREMY)
I guess I am pretty tall…

(PAST-MICHAEL)
…Hey, do you like to play Pokemon?

(PAST-JEREMY)
Totally! I’ve got 50 cards!

(PAST-MICHAEL)
Do you wanna play?

(PAST-JEREMY)
I’ll ask my dad
I’m sure he’ll say ‘go, make a friend, and stay’
Be right back,
I’ll be right back!

(MICHAEL)
I, I, I
I didn’t fall immediately for him
It took a few years
To develop a bond that would last for this long
We’ve laughed and shed tears
He’s my feeling of freedom
My feeling of trust
My feeling of love–
Maybe a feeling of lust?
Our conversation lasted two minutes
Maybe three minutes
Until we were best friends, both in total agreement
He’s a dream come true, stutters and quirks
I love how he talks and I love how he looks
He’s a bit of nerd, but I am too, so
I asked about his video games, he lit up anew
His hands started fidgeting, his eyes were wide
Remembering it makes me hurt now inside…

Handsome, but he doesn’t know it
Dorky, wants to overgrow it

I told him he was like a vintage cassette
It’s pitiful how much I love him, and yet–

(SQUIP)
Upgrade

(MICHAEL)
I know I’m no

(SQUIP)
Upgrade

(MICHAEL)
He deserves an

(SQUIP)
Upgrade

(MICHAEL)
And anyway
I’m
Just replacable, who cares if I leave or I stay–

{…}

(MICHAEL)
I know Jeremy like I know my own mind,
You will never find anyone as desperate as his kind
If he wants to move on forward, then so be it, sure fine
Leave me behind
‘Players 1 and 2’… Such lying

But when I sit at my lunch table
And chance a glance at him
I can’t help but sigh because inside I think
I knew I
Had this a long time coming…
At least Jeremy’s cool; chill at last
Even if he had to erase our past…