i laughed for like 2 hours at this part you have no idea

shibolet3  asked:

Wait what con artist from 2014

I’d like to title this story “Swing And A Miss

Okay, so my high school had this program where seniors could leave school like a month and a half early and opt out of exams if they took on internships around the neighborhood, but not everyone wanted to/was eligible to do it. Back in like 2013, they had like 15 bored seniors stuck in the school, so the administration brought in this Professional Life Coach, left him in alone in a room with them for two hours to talk to them about like, self-esteem or some shit. All the kids were pulled out of their classes for this*, and later told the administration that they loved him, they really enjoyed the talk.

So, about a year later, we have a new principal. He’s supposed to set up an assembly for all the 11th and 12th graders, but he doesn’t know what to do. One of his coworkers mentions that there was a life coach that was a huge hit with the kids that didn’t do community study last year, so maybe he’d also be great for a larger audience. The principal basically thinks “okay, what the hell” and calls up and hires Jason C. Jean to come talk to the kids.

Now, it’s like, 10:30, maybe 11:00 in the morning, and two entire grades are getting shepherded to the main gymnasium, and no one wants to God damn be there. We ain’t got time for self esteem talks. We want to sleep. And this guy, watching us all drag our feet in and collapse into the bleachers was just like…offensively peppy. There’s a couple faculty members sitting behind him, the woman who suggested he be hired for this, the vice principals for the grades- but the principal himself kept getting calls so he was in and out the whole time.

Now, Mr. Jean was like…the chill “Just call me by my first name dude” history professor at college times 30. He was trying so fucking hard. I’m referring to him as ‘Mr. Jean’ in this story just to be disrespectful. So anyway, we all get in there, and he tells us right off the bat “You guys are totally allowed to be on your phones and laptops during this! I get it! It’s no problem, like really, I insist!” so while the faculty members are exchanging smiles that read ‘how do we kill that while respecting him’, all the kids are immediately pulling out their electronics and he’s starts his speech.

Now, again, I really wanna reiterate that he told us we could be on our phones- because when the news articles started coming out about this, I remember all these angry, annoying comments from old people like “Why the hell were the students on their phones in the first place! So disrespectful! These damn millennials and their social media!” like, they were completely ignoring the entire story and just focusing in on kids using the internet, and it Really Super Pissed Me Off, so. Again, we had permission for this (which also ended up being Mr. Jean’s fatal mistake).

So, he starts off this speech fairly normally, like ‘hi, I’m Jason, I’m a professional life coach and I wanna teach you kids about how to be The Best You!’ and like people were tuning him out and listening to varying degrees. Some kids (like myself) were kinda dozing off, and everyone was on twitter or facebook.

His approach to a self esteem speech seemed to be ‘let me tell you my entire life story for hours’ and like, at first I was like “I’m not really hearing this, I’m half dreaming right now” but the more I started making myself pay attention the more…bizarre and rambling his story got.

So like, for instance, he told us he drank a lot in high school. Like, a lot. But he didn’t use that as a ‘don’t drink or party too hard’ lesson, instead he was like “I was fourteen so I always called my parents to pick me up, and they weren’t mad because they knew it meant I could trust them. So remember, always tell your parents when you’re drinking!” and then it kinda got to a point where it sounded like he was encouraging partying and drinking and the like to the group of underage kids.

And then, he told us how he used to play baseball all the time when he was a kid, and at 16 reached a crossroads in his life where the Phillies wanted to draft him or he could go play football for Penn State. And he said he went with Penn State but later lost the scholarship for some reason and we’re like…really.

There was absolutely nothing coherent about anything he was saying- nothing that tied anything together, made a point, seemed like it had anything to do with an assembly on self esteem. He told us at one point he was making upwards of 7 million a year. He told us one time before college he was homeless. He told us he used to own a construction company and built his own branch of nightclubs himself, that he and his friend then ran. He told us he fought a shark and came out with no scars. He told us that he had less money now, because after surviving a work related accident- direct quote- “I fell almost 30 feet and I broke in half” - he decided to leave that industry and spend more time with his family.

So, yeah, I was pretty positive this was bullshit, but there were clearly kids in the room that were falling for it. But then he said something like…he and his friend got bored one day and started jarring up their own pasta sauce, and made a deal with wegmans or some store like that to start selling it, and now he has a pasta sauce empire. Like he spent 15 fucking minutes on this. The way he kept saying ‘pasta sauce’ was so annoying I was about to claw my ears out. But anyway, two girls in my grade wanted to find out what brand he was talking about, so they googled his name.

And then quietly gasped.

And then furiously started typing into their phones.

And remember- everyone, even though they were paying attention- was on twitter and facebook. All the sudden I see heads flying up and wide eyes and people whispering to each other. Mr. Jean doesn’t seem to notice the change and keeps rambling on, but I know something happened so I google him too and-

Okay so basically he’s 1) been arrested, 2) filed for bankruptcy like three times and 3) has been hailed as a ‘Swinger Guru’ by playboy.

EVERYONES SILENTLY FLIPPING OUT.

So by now, this is a fucking game- he still doesn’t notice anything wrong amongst the kids, so we’re all silently texting each other to fill each other in. Pulling up receipts. But still playing the part of politely intrigued audience members. The school faculty have no fucking idea what’s going on, until one of the students texts her mom, who happens to be the woman that convinced the principal to hire this guy. We see her check her phone, go wide-eyed, and she runs out of the fucking room presumably to either find the principal or hide in terror.

So Mr. Jean had been talking to random people intermittently throughout this speech, but we reach the ‘questions’ part of it. Everyone seems to silently agree that instead of just asking him anything outright, we should just see how good of a liar he was. So they’d be asking him stuff like ‘how much money did you make with ____ company’ and he’d give a ridiculously high number as people were sending each other reports of him filing for bankruptcy during that time. Or they asked him about his construction business which he said was great, and while he was talking about how great it was we were all reading his arrest report, from when a woman hired him to build her house, and he took her money and then like…just didn’t build anything. Wild. Someone asked him about his family and he’s extolling Christian virtues while we’re all on the website for his annual Swing Fest. People would ask him how he got certain jobs and he was making promises to hook kids up in interviews and shit. Everyone was loosing their God damn minds online and just barely holding it together in person. This man was so beyond full of shit- like, he was a God awful life coach but his dedication to lying was inspirational.

We eventually get to leave and everyone is yelling and cracking up and freaking out, all running to our classes to tell the teachers and the underclassmen everything, and the teachers are freaking out, alternating between horrified confusion and laughing hysterically. Before the school day even ended, someone had called a bunch of news stations. The principal was freaking out and denying he had anything to do with it, before calling some students to his office to see what exactly the kids had searched up on the guy…Because apparently teenagers can perform better background checks than school officials. It was all anyone could talk about for weeks.

A couple months after this, for my theater class’ showcase, I wrote and directed a skit called ‘Mason B. Mean’. It was a huge hit. The principal was in the audience. I’ve never seen a grown man look so dead inside. I made sure I was out of the room before he came up to congratulate the cast and everything. The next day, my theater teacher told me his only comment about the skit was a quiet, long-suffering “Why.” 😂😂

Annnnnnnnd that’s the time a Swinger Entrepreneur rambled on about pasta sauce and money in front of teenagers who knew how to use google for almost two hours.  

http://www.philly.com/philly/news/breaking/Montco_principal_apologizes_for_having_swinger_entrepreneur_speak_to_kids.html

DOCTOR DREAMY | PT.2 [M]

pt1 | pt2 | (ongoing)

pairing: jimin x reader

genre: smut, fluff, slight angst + expecting parents au

word count: 11,035

request: sperm donor ex-boyfriend jimin

description: Okay, maybe in hindsight asking your ex-boyfriend, who you never really got over, to be your sperm-donor wasn’t the brightest of ideas.

cr. 


six years prior.

“Do you wanna have kids one day?”

Jimin tilted his head as if to ponder the idea before tugging you across the bed until you were leaning against his chest, curious eyes catching your own.  

“Sure, I mean one day. One day, far, far away,” He said, pointing his finger off into the distance jokingly.

You laughed, hand skimming along the back of his neck. “Yeah, me too.”

“Any particular reason why you’re asking?” He said as he began playing with the strands of your hair.

“I dunno,” You shrugged. “We’ve been dating for a long time, just thought that it’s something we should know about each other.”

Jimin nodded, “No, you’re right. It’s kind of something you should figure out before things get too far in the relationship… Guess we waited a bit too long, but we’re on the same page, so that’s good,” He smiled, leaning down to place a short peck against your lips.

“So that means you think that information will be put to good use one day?” You asked, quirking your brow to insinuate.

Keep reading

Jackson Heights - Peter Parker

request -  Hey! I was wondering if you could write a fic where the reader is recruited to fight in civil war with Steve and she ends up fighting peter and while fighting they spark up a conversation and become friends? And then soon they become more than friends?

a/n - going back to peter in civil war and trying to bring out his more rookie/dorky side was fun but i went back and forth with a ton of ideas for this fic, i hope it turned out good enough and isn’t trash like me :( but don’t forget to request a fic if you’d like and follow!

The airport terminal was ripped into pieces as the minutes went by. The battle between Stark and Rogers had spread like a disease, influencing the whole team to pick sides and fight until one victor remained. I was among that group, suddenly finding myself fighting against the people whom I held dearest to my heart, supposedly helping Captain in this messy situation.

My back was pressed up against Wanda’s, circling around to defy anyone that came near us. T’Challa had tried his best to come and toy with us, my spine shivering once I heard the claws come out of his suit and pounce towards Wanda and I, only to be stopped by the force of her hands. I watched as his body flew across the premise, landing on pieces of debris.

“(Y/N). Spider-Man coming for you from Eastside.” Carter said over the intercom.

“Spider what?” I furrowed my brows, turning around only to get swooped into the air.

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Guilty Pleasure {BBH} (M)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Description: You and Baekhyun are best friends and you’ve lived together for three years now. It’s no news to you that Baekhyun sleeps around, but you do too…so what happens when he wants to be with someone as experienced as him? // Requested

Genre: Smut / Angst / Fluff all of the above??

Word Count: 2,432 (possible series?????? three parts at max tho I’m a busy lady)

Pairing: Byun Baekhyun x Reader (feat. Lay)

Author: Admin Xiufairy

Originally posted by ethereal-baek

“C’mon, you can’t say you haven’t thought about it.” Your best friend, Baekhyun, nudged your arm. “There’s no shame in it. It’d be nice to be with someone who finally knows what they’re doing.” You put your cup of coffee down and looked at him from across the table.

It was no secret that Baekhyun slept around, but you liked to keep things under wraps. As long as the boys didn’t know, everything was fine. Baek, being your best friend, found out on his own. You weren’t planning on telling him either.

You’d been living with Baekhyun for a couple years now - it was originally just for a few weeks until you could find a place of your own but the two of you quickly grew close.

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Tuesday Recommendations

The fics listed below can be old or fairly new, so this has no timeline. Neither an order of preference. It’s just a bunch of stories I loved and I’d like to share with you.
*The NSFW fics are tagged as such - 18+ only!
**You can expect some swearing in my personal notes.


Steve Rogers

  • Little Monster (W.I.P.): Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 by @hellomissmabel - {NSFW} - Annie, you’re incredible! You had to be the first in the list because you already know how much I FREAKING LOVE this series! The amount of work put in this series is impressive and the characterization is seriously interesting. The plot is so well-thought-out. Everything happens here: fantasies, suspense, intensity and you can only have tons of questions at the end of each chapter because the rhythm changes and gets even better! It’s incredible and you can’t predict the future of the characters which is the best thing ever!
  • Super dominant, super possessive Super Soldier by @chrisevans-imagines - {NSFW} - I’m such a slut for Dom!Steve… oops. Ava, you’re torturing me with that hot build-up, that damn sexual tension and that perfect dirty talk and that little perfect heated promise at the end. You got me going and once again, the tingles were so incredible that I had to take a little break and go back to read the end. Stunning!

  • Not a One Time Thing by @literallyanyfxndom - {NSFW} - Actually, I really enjoyed this one because of the plot and the build-up: it’s fresh and the chemistry is what I love the most with Steve being a real sweetheart. The rest of the Avengers playing the matchmakers is my new favorite thing!

  • Late by @VindictiveGrace on AO3 - {NSFW} - For a first time writing a Reader insert fic… this was incredible! So sexy and I love the writing style, it’s so light and sometimes funny. Steve was amazing, not OOC at all and I even liked the fact he just wants his girlfriend to relax, no matter the consequences. I especially loved the edging part of the story.

  • Stop Lying by @avengersimaginings - {NSFW} - Can we discuss the fact that Reader being a villain is actually very good to read/write and it should become more important in our fandom. Thank you for writing this gorgeous piece of hot fic. It was amazing to read more of hot-blooded and “dark” Steve.

  • The Engineering Lab by @angryschnauzer - {NSFW} - Let me tell you something… you ruined my panties, girl! This sexual tension between Steve and Reader is almost too much to handle. Your writing is on point and as much as I’m not into anal, this piece of art was amazing and so hot! The stealth suit of sin (as I call it) and the handcuffs: holy fucking shit! That was wonderful.

  • Caught in the Act by @angryschnauzer - {NSFW} - Stop everything and lock yourself in your bedroom because that thing is just so, so good and so intense! I’m just a big fan of the balance between surprise, sexy and funny. The ending was brilliant!

  • Civvies by @after-avenging-hours - {NSFW} - Hot damn. I can’t even tell you how much I love this one because there’s almost everything I love about Steve. This is some amazing fic written with an incredible talent. It was intense and so were the tingles! If you need more conviction: Steve wearing jeans hugging that pretty little as of his.


Chris Evans

  • Just Friends: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5A / Part 5B by @ohevansmycaptain - The plot in this new mini-series is honestly very good and you’ll either disagree with Sebastian Stan temporarily or you’ll be an extreme Chris x Reader shipper. Fluff and humor, as ever, the best mix of all. The chemistry between Chris and his friend is so well-developed and the jokes are awesome. Tender, soft, flirty and funny. Definitely Chris! I LOVED IT!
  • Fix Up by @chrisevans-imagines - {NSFWish} - Ava! You know you’re killing me, don’t you? You know this could happen ‘cause everyone says – especially Anthony Mackie – that Chris’ driving is terrible! It was so hot and yet, with the little fluff at the end, it stays so steamy and flirty!

  • Jelly Beans by @chrisevans-imagines - {NSFW} - The amount of fluff was phenomenal and the fluffy smut was beautifully written. It was so soft and the way you described how they behaved… And the jelly bean idea is pure genius! You know how much I love the way you write Chris, he’s the stupid bearded sweater wearing dumb dork we adore

  • Drunk Texts by @4theluvofall - {NSFW} - Alert. Things are getting hot and interesting here. Actually, the introduction is quite hilarious because I just love the way Chris is written. A bit of Dom!Chris to make your day look better is all you need. And lastly, the gif used works so well with the whole dynamic of the one-shot.

  • His Devilish Fingers by @theycallmebecca - {NSFW} - I love the writing style so much! This was so amazing, heated and passionate. The way the pleasure switches between Chris and then Reader is so well-written and I really enjoyed the fact it happened also silently. Honestly, Becca’s dabbles are so good - NSFW or not - that I couldn’t choose more. So, check her Master List and enjoy the great work. It’s worth it.

  • Not Your Typical Frat Boy: Part 1 / Part 2 by @i-dont-do-rpfs - {NSFW} - Frat Boy Evans? Yes, please! This is so good and the dynamic between the frat boy and the real Chris is amazing. Suffer with me and drown in hotness and the want to punch Chris and then yourself in the face… you will understand.

  • The New Model by @angryschnauzer - {NSFW} - I absolutely loved this work and I made an effort to enjoy the Daddy kink lightly used here. The plot, the place and the way Chris is written is very new and work well together. As ever, I’m just a huge admirer of the writing style which is very inspiring and pure art.


Miscellaneous characters

- Johnny Storm

  • I Don’t Know Why I Instigate by @bittenbyimagines - This is just so funny. Johnny can’t keep his hands to himself and especially when he’s feeling hot… this perfect set when he was experiencing the first side effects of the cosmic storm in Fantastic Four.
  • Drunk Enough by @imaginesnthings - I like the way the author explored furthermore the struggle Johnny began to feel during the events of Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer – where he realizes that being this womanizer won’t last forever and he has to find THE one. It’s just a really great one-shot.

 - Curtis Everett

  • Terrified by @chrisevans-imagines - {NSFW} - Brilliant! We need more Curtis in our lives and Ava is one of the authors who fulfilled our wish. He got his head straight and finally made the first move. I really loved this one because this shows the soft and venerable side of his personality.
  • Shhhhh by @captaincorruptor - {NSFW} - Everything about that one-shot is perfect: the writing is just brilliant and the characterization is on point. Curtis: the tortured soul, but the caring leader. What I love the most - apart from the brilliant smut itself - is the way the atmosphere in the train is described. Read this one, seriously.

  • After Hours: Part 1 / Part 2 by @ariallane - {NSFW} - An AU worth reading. I’m so glad because Curtis deserves so much love and this is all about him and his pleasure and comfort. It’s nice seeing him happy after what happened in the train and it’s actually very, very hot! Especially the last part.

- Jake Jensen

  • Accidental Friend by @misshyen - The humor and the fluff were so mixed so well and the characterization is very accurate. I loved every bit of this and I couldn’t stop smiling the whole time. When I read the first paragraph, I literally had his voice in my head singing Don’t Stop Believin’.
  • Smooth Criminal by @such-fun - Cutest piece of writing here! The awkward and adorable dork we love so much perfectly written and the plot is actually so cool because that’s something he would totally do.

  • Shut Up by @samuelsbucky - {NSFW} - I was so damn happy when I read it because it is the FIRST Jake Jensen x Reader smut I found in years! A very bold Jensen we have here, but this is honestly so good!

- Frank Adler

  • Perfect Distractions: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 by @always-an-evans-addict - {NSFW} - This mini-series starts to very cute and then stop to hot damn… the chemistry is great and Frank is such a little tease, always taunting Reader. I particularly enjoyed it because of the atmosphere.
  • Cupcakes and Rainstorms: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 by @angryschnauzer - {NSFW} - That was wonderfully written, I’m such a big fan of your style and it’s so inspiring. Everything was perfect: the way you wrote all of them, the interaction was amazing and the build-up perfect. It was so smooth and natural. You’ve done such a great job.

- Mike Weiss

  • What’s Left by @forceimagines - {NSFW} – Here is the ONLY Mike Weiss fic on the internet, so you can’t pass this one up because this might one of my favorites. The balance between angst – which is very necessary, knowing Mike – and the smut were perfect. It hits right in the feels and the ending opens to many possibilities. Bravo.
epiphany | jungkook

Pairing: Jungkook + Reader 

Genre: Fluff + college au 

Word Count: 3.6k 

Part: | 1 | 2 |  

Summary: You hated his guts, especially after he ruined your chance at getting a good grade in one of your toughest classes. But why did your heart beat a little faster every time you saw him? And why did he feel the same way?

Reader’s POV

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to give you a failing grade, Y/N…” Mr.Ransford frowned,“ You should’ve saved your work somewhere separately you know?”

You gaped at him in complete shock, as everything came crashing down on you.

“B-but you don’t understand! It wasn’t my fault-” you stammered, your hands flailing around in a frenzy as you attempted to explain your dire situation to your psychology professor.

“Y/N, I’m sorry I’m afraid we can’t discuss this right now, I have a class in 2 minutes. We’ll talk later, hm?” he said as you sighed, your shoulders slumping in utter defeat.

He patted your shoulders in sympathy as you walked out of the door, tears welling up in your eyes as you thought of all your hard work that was now flushed down the drain. All because of one boy.

That damn Jeon Jungkook.

—-

“YAH!” you yelled, raging, as you approached the boys, a deadly glare in your eyes as you grabbed Jungkook by the collar of his tshirt. Pulling him up from the bleachers where him and the rest of his friends were sitting, all of them gasped, mouths going agape as they witnessed their golden maknae get manhandled by you.

“Y/N~What a pleasure,” Jungkook said, giving you a lazy smirk.

Your blood boiled at the audacity the boy had, to address you in such a way, after he had destroyed your chance at a good grade- heck a good year of college. Without thinking first, you lifted your hand and slapped him across the face, the contact shooting vibrations of pain down your arm as the noise echoed in the air. Immediate silence followed, everyone looking at the two of you with rounded eyes as Jungkook himself, was in shock.

You stood there, your chest rising up and down, breathing heavy as you glowered at him. His hands flew to his cheek as he let out a stream of curse words, his gaze landing on yours, fire kindling in his eyes as he reddened in embarrassment.

Keep reading

I Think I’m In Love With You

Author: ceruleanbucky

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 2.1k

WARNINGS: SMUT, cursing, oral (male and female receiving), UNPROTECTED SEX, fingering, sexual tension, fluff, and overall sin.

A/N: guy’s I’ve updated twice in like a week and a half what is happening?!?! I mean, it’s not necessarily bad. Also, this fic is hella long, and I;m not going to lie, I’m really proud of it. Hope you guys like it! Part two of “Seven Minutes In Heaven” is coming next week.


You wake up with a start, breathing heavily and covered in a thin sheen of sweat. You tried to recall what it was you were dreaming about, but to no avail. You eventually give up, thinking that it was another nightmare.

You glance at your alarm clock, wondering about the time. Seeing that you have two more hours to sleep, you gladly roll over and go back to sleep.

When your alarm goes off, you feel even more tired than you were earlier. You still manage to drag yourself out of bed, and start your day. It’s then when you smell the bacon, and the coffee. Perking up at the idea of a good breakfast, you put on some more decent pyjamas, and head to the kitchen. Most people are still asleep, seeing as the sun is only just rising, so you wonder who is in the kitchen. You step in, and find Bucky cooking up a storm.

“Sad, or mad?” You ask as you walk in, knowing it’s one of the two. He looks at you with confusion, so you rephrase.

“Are you cooking because you’re sad, or because you’re pissed off? Because I know you, Bucky, and it’s only one of those two.” You smirk at your friend, earning a smirk back.

“Neither actually.” He side-eyes, adding to your curiosity.

Keep reading

Trouble in Canada // 2

a/n: You all have been so patient and I know I’m a bit late (4 months late soz about that). Every single one of you have been so amazing with the support of this, and it blows my mind every time I get a notification that TiC got another note. And when I posted earlier today that I was posting it, I absolutely loved the response I got in my inbox.  It made my heart incredibly happy and with each message that came in, not gonna lie, i teared up a bit. You all have been so lovely and good sports (especially when i posted that fake TiC2 WHAT A TIME). So from the bottom of my heart, thank you for all the support. I have met some of the most incredible people through TiC and I cherish every single one of you. I feel so emotional posting this, but you all finally deserve the second part to probably the most angsty piece I have ever written (and will ever write omg).  So, please enjoy the second and final installment to Trouble in Canada :)

THANK YA TO MY LOVELY @whitechocolateperfection for reading over this and giving me confidence :) you’re the best and i love you a whole lot 

Trouble in Canada (1)  |  Masterlist

Your name: submit What is this?

“We need to talk,”

        Those four words held a weight so heavy that you lost your grip on your tea.  Your mug dropped to the floor, shattering in pieces and tea spilling all over the hardwood floor.  You immediately went to pick up the broken pieces.  On your knees, you picked up the shards of glass as Shawn was stood in the same exact position; not moving a single bone in his body to help you.

        Collecting all the tiny shards in your hand you swiftly moved past Shawn to go throw the pieces out in the kitchen.  You opened the trash bin, and right as you were about to throw out the broken mug, Shawn’s voice interrupted your movements, “Is that the mug I got you?  The one from our first Valentine’s day together?”

Keep reading

I HATE YOU. I LOVE YOU?

anon said: Hi! If your request are still open… can I request a jimin bad boy smut where her father’s friend son ( jimin) is living with them for a few years and the tension is just building up. Thank you! I love your writings!💕💕

Summary: Throughout high school you’ve hated Park Jimin. That doesn’t change when he begins living with you… or does it? 

Warnings: language, oral sex (unprotected) 

Word Count: 10.7k+ 

A/N: The gif is mine. 


When you were two years old you’d met Park Jimin. He wasn’t even a year older than you and your father’s best friend’s son. That was beyond confusing for your two year old mind so he was simply referred to as a family friend’s son. You never had a problem with Park Jimin until your freshman year of high school when everything changed. He’d cut off all ties with you and began hanging out with a group of six other boys. He had a different girl hanging onto his arm each week and it was no secret that he and his friends often bet each other to ask girls out just for kicks.

Keep reading

NCT 127 reaction to you falling asleep on them

rest of the reactions under the cut - kept as gender neutral as possible

taeil

Originally posted by dimplesjae

  • honestly he’d probably be running his fingers through your hair while you lay down on top of him while watching tv or something
  • it’d be a while before he even noticed you’re asleep
  • when he does it’s kind of startling because you’re so quiet?? wow amazing
  • “wow”
  • when he realizes he stops combing through your hair because what if it wakes you up or something
  • but then you stir and move your head a little higher up on his chest and he’s like oh
  • so he goes back to playing with your hair and braids it and stuff
  • have fun combing it all out when you wake up lmao
  • your legs and his are entangled and one of his hands is on your back and the other in your hair or behind his head
  • you’re basically flat on top of him
  • he doesn’t want to move too much
  • taeil is like… crazy afraid of waking you up because you must be s o tired and he doesn’t wanna ruin your much needed sleep
  • “ah they’re so pretty”
  • turns off the tv eventually because he’s watching you now and not even paying attention to it
  • wont make any noise honestly
  • eventually he’ll probably fall asleep to the sound of your breathing tbh
  • while you’re listening to the sound of his heartbeat

Keep reading

our little family pt.6 | park jimin

Pairing: Father! Jimin + Reader

Genre: Fluff/Angst + parent au

Word Count: 6.1k

Summary: You were just a pre-school teacher, a simple dream that came true as you always adored children. But what you didn’t know, was how one child and her very special father would change you dream forever.

Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6

AN: Ah…the final part. I just want to say thank you for all those who have read and stayed with me through this lovely journey of writing OLF and being super supportive of the story. I tried my absolute best to wrap it up in the nicest way possible (but just a tad disappointed with my writing :/ ) however again thank you so much and enjoy! 

You tied your messy hair up into a ponytail, attempting to get the small, distracting hairs out of your face as you started to take out things from the refrigerator to make Jieun and yourself some lunch.

Hearing small footsteps behind you and a voice call out your name, you turned around from the countertop to see Jieun standing in the middle of the kitchen, her hands rubbing her droopy eyes as she stared up at you, resembling that of a long, lost puppy.

A warm smile spread across your face as you exclaimed, “Hey, look at you, you’re up!” as you lifted the little girl into your arms and spun her around, eliciting small giggles from her mouth before setting her down on the kitchen countertop.

Your eyes glanced towards the time before looking back at Jieun, “Do you feel hungry? It’s almost lunch time.”

She nodded quickly, a big smile spreading across her face when she asked, “Can we eat cookies? I really liked your cookies last time!”

You giggled as you pinched her nose softly, “Uh-huh, you can’t eat cookies for lunch now, can you?! How about we make some macaroni and cheese and then we’ll bake cookies for snack time later? Does that sound like a good idea?”

Her eyes lit up at that as she grinned, “Mac and cheese?! That’s my favorite! Daddy makes it for me all the time.”

“Well then it’s up to you to pick who’s Mac and cheese you like better okay?” you teased, as she nodded happily before whispering to you, “I think you might win Ms. L/N. Daddy sometimes burns the cheese and it turns all black and gooey.”

You laughed at that before saying, “Well, I guess it’s time to teach him how to properly cook huh?”

“Or Ms.L/N could come live with us? Then you can cook delicious food for me and daddy!” Jieun exclaimed, an innocent smile on her face.

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Park Chanyeol//The Rhythm of Hate - Part 2

Summary: You hate each other, even though you’re soulmates. You try and stay away from each other, but a shared course and a project is determined to keep you two facing off. (Part 1/Part 2)
Scenario: Soulmate!AU, college!AU
Word Count: 6,726

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Being pregnant with Chris Evans' baby:

Originally posted by chrisevanshh

Some parts of the pregnancy are slightly exaggerated to give more humor.

• It’s no secret, Chris has said many times he wants to be a dad and he’s looking forward to it. So, when you stand in the bathroom with the positive tests in hands, you really aren’t stressed about telling him. You’re quite excited to see his face because you love kids too.
• When you tell him you’re pregnant, he looks at you with wide eyes because he has no idea how to react: he’s probably thinking of how much he wants to kiss you for the rest of his life or asking you to marry him all over again, or even make another baby right now!
• Though, it’s not long before he reacts when he sees the five pregnancy tests. He laughs so happily as he spoons you in his arms that you can’t help but giggle and he keeps telling you he loves you so much.
• He can’t even stop kissing you or your tummy.
• The first days after the announcement, he keeps giggling with you and asks himself if it’s a dream or not. He also tries not to freak out and get nervous.
• Your families are overly happy to hear the news.
• His mother cries at this moment because her baby boy will have his own baby.
• Chris worries about his ability to be a good father, but you kiss his insecurities away and tell him he is a great father already because he wants to be a dad for so long and that’s also something he gotta learn with time and with you.
• He takes care of you all day. Every day.
• You can wake him up at 2 in the morning to eat your favorite meal.
• You both eat Starbucks’ jelly beans right after.
• Chris plans your baby’s first trip to Disney World secretly. He buys everything he needs to make sure they will love everything related to Disney!
• He is unsurprisingly protective.
• Chris grins like an idiot for hours whenever he hears the heartbeat of your baby and when he feels their very first kicks.
• - “Stop carrying me everywhere, Chris. I can walk. I’m pregnant, not sick.”
 - “I know, but I don’t want you to take a risk.”
• Chris is here for you every step of the way and assures you he loves this baby and you more than anything else.
• He realizes that marrying was the best choice he made you when your hormones are going wild.
• One day, you catch him purchasing some Patriots baby gift sets and clothing. You basically have to stop him before he can buy everything related to his favorite team in the NFL store.
• He’s still currently trying to find a Tom Brady bodysuit with “Baby Evans” flocked at the back.
• You call your mother every time something new happens during your pregnancy and when she says everything is fine, Chris calls Lisa to double check.
 - “Did you seriously call your mom?”
 - “Sweetheart, it’s just to be sure.”
• Chris smiles every time you say you look too big, but he thinks you are gorgeous as ever with this baby bump. Because you carry life, so nothing is more beautiful.
 - “Chris, why are you even staying with me? I look like a potato.”
 - “You are perfect and this the most beautiful moment of our lives. It’s our baby inside.”
 - “Okay, I trust you this time. But only because you’ve also gained weight.”
 - “That’s my gi… Wait, what?!”
• Chris sings Disney songs every night to your baby before sleep. Let’s be honest, he does this all the time.
• He wants to have a boy first just to teach him how to prank you in the future.

BonusBonus:
• He is in-between a mix of stress and joy when you go into labor. He’s there for you, though.
• You almost crush the bones of his hand when you push.
 - “Never again! I will never let you touch me ever again, Evans! Heard me?!”
 - “Don’t exaggerate, it’s- OUCH!”
 - “Please, Mrs. Evans, stop threatening your husband. You have to push!”
• Chris cries and smiles when he holds your baby for the first time.


PERMANENT TAG LIST:
@feelmyroarrrr @gallifreyansass @bicevans @ballerinafairyprincess @misschrisevans @always-an-evans-addict @kennadance14 @buckybarnesisalittleshit @helloitscrowley @captainamerica-ce @kiwi71281 @topthis808 @dead-lee-15 @the-daydreamer-girl @our-love-world @hellomissmabel @voidobsession @mrssierrarogers @redstarstan @punkrockhippiefromthefourties @angryschnauzer @fangirling-is-what-i-do-best @minstrel-axx @captainamerotica @kaitlynthehuman @juneookami @mellifluous-melodramas @sfreeborn @buckyswinterchildren @potterhead1265 @castellandiangelo @louisespecter @fvckingevans @katnisswa @justanotherfangurlz @10kindsofderp @1enchantedfantasy1 @logan8546 @thewinterpunkass - tell me if you’d like to be added. :)

Watch Me Babygirl [pt.8]

Summary: Jungkook is your brother’s annoying best friend. You can’t stand him but he just can’t resist teasing you. How far will he actually go?

Warnings: slight language

[pt.1] [pt.2] [pt.3] [pt.4] [pt.5] [pt.6] [previous part] [next part] [pt.10] [pt.11]  [pt.12] [pt.13] [pt.14]


Jungkook huffed, annoyed. He’d spent the last two hours with you, sitting in a blanket fort in his basement watching dumb movies.

“When you said you wanted talk to me about stuff, I thought you meant verbally,” he grumbled, pulling you closer to him.

You nuzzled the back of your head against his chest and sighed.

“I did and I will…” you replied.

To be honest, you were simply nervous about talking to him about what you had in mind. Ever since Taehyung had come clean about him and your brother, you’d been thinking that maybe, just maybe, you should come clean to Jimin about you and Jungkook. Another part of you reasoned that it wasn’t the right time now and that it would never be the right time.

You felt Jungkook sigh deeply, his breath breath blowing your hair ever so slightly.

Taking in a deep breath of your own and releasing it, you plucked up the courage to talk to Jungkook about coming clean.

“I wasn’t guilty about sneaking around at first…” you paused, taking a shaky breath. “But then Taehyung told me about him and Jimin and I suddenly felt like, I don’t know, maybe we should tell Jimin about us.

“Another part of me is still not ready to tell Jimin. I just- I just don’t know what to do Jungkook. I really want to be with you. You mean a lot to me.”

Jungkook nodded, his chin hitting the top of your head lightly.

“Well…” he began slowly. “What if we pretended like we were slowly becoming friends? Like, I stop giving you grief in public and you stop throwing sassy comments my way in return. We look like we’re becoming friends, like we’re changing for each other because we like each other- which isn’t far from the truth to be honest- and warm him up to the idea.”

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Imagination Lane // “Imagine This” Scenario #2: Bill Skarsgard

Originally posted by thebeautyandthatbass

(Warning: This is slightly long for an imagine scenario, but I couldn’t help but write this out. I’m also in a sappy Bill mood, and I needed this as soon as the idea struck me last night as I laid in bed trying to get to sleep. Shame on me lol.)

If you want to know what The First Fight Box is and what it entails, click here.

Imagine This: You and Bill have entered into your first serious argument as a married couple. A few months back, on your wedding day, you both created what you called “The First Fight Box,” and slipped letters inside for you both to read – when the time came. 

Today, you both have agreed to a small cease-fire within your heated argument and decided to open the box…


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Rules of Engagement (shiro x reader)

Rules of Engagement

Shiro x Reader

Imagine: Being the communications specialist with Shiro and Matt at the garrison.

Warning: Just a little making out ;)

AN: Hey guys! I hope you all like this one, let me know what you liked, or if you have any requests!

~~~

His lips felt like fire on her skin. There was no pulling away at this point, not that it even crossed her mind. The feeling of his body pressed against hers, his thigh positioned between her legs, how his fingers gripped her hips, all of it made it impossible to think of anything else, but how good it felt. This was definitely against protocol, the small portion of her brain that has retained its sanity thought in the back of her head. It all felt like a deram. And if it was she never wanted to wake up.

She and Shiro were on the same flight team at the garrison. He was the pilot, and she, his communications specialist. They were also accompanied by an engineer by the name of Matt Holt, she swore he was some kind of genius, it was the only explanation for how smart he was. They had all been friends, but with the hours spent in the flight simulator, the late night study sessions, the constant contact between them, they became much more than that. The connection between her and Shiro was unshakable, you would never see one without the other, inseparable. It wasn’t until their third year at the garrison, did they notice a change in their dynamic. They weren’t the only ones to notice this change, Matt knew something was going on between them, even if they didn’t know exactly what.

For weeks, it was nothing but chaos. Longing stares from across the room, lingering touches, constant blushing, all at the expense of Matt’s sanity. There was a time when the two of you could barely be in the same room, in fear that in your clumsy state, someone could get hurt. Matt didn’t mind at first, that is until your team failed the flight simulator, putting a permanent ‘F’ on his record. Shiro had gotten distracted by you, in the middle of the mission, when you cut your hand on a stray screw driver, causing Shiro to panic, and in the end, sent their team crashing to the ground in a blazing fireball. He’d had enough.

He told you both to meet him in room B26, to go over what went wrong, and finish the mission report on the simulation failure. Each of you feeling a different kind of shame in the failure of the basic sim, and each feeling that it was your fault things had gone south.

The next morning when you arrived at the room, you met with Shiro on the way, but neither of you could stand to meet the other’s gaze. Too embarrassed to think it was your lack to self control that had ruined the mission. Keeping your head bowed, you both entered the room, the first thing you noticed was how cold and damp it was, the lights were off making it hard to see exactly where you were. Shiro’s shins came in contact with a mop bucket, sending it skidding across the floor.

“What the- “ he began, his eyes adjusting enough to see the shelves that lined the walls, filled different cleaning supplies. “Is this… a Janitor’s closet?” thinking that they must have walked into the wrong room, Shiro turned to exit, only to have the door slammed in his face. Shocked, he rushed forward testing the doorknob, and finding it locked. Thinking it must have been an accident, he slammed his fist against the metal door trying to get the attention of whoever had closed the door.

“Hey! We are in here! The door is locked, can you open it?” he called, hoping they were still close enough to hear him. There was a moment of silence, before they heard a familiar voice reply.

“I’m not letting you out until you two work this out! I don’t know what is going on with you buys, but whatever ‘it’ is, fix it! I am not going to get another ‘F’ in that stupid simulator, just because you two are acting like lovesick teenagers!” Matt’s voice was filled with a mix of anger and frustration. There was another pause, followed by what Shiro assumed was a sigh. “I’ll be back in an hour.” he said more calmly before walking away, ignoring the protests from his teammates.

They spent the next 10 minutes searching for another way out, only finding 4 metal walls all lined with janitorial equipment, and an air vent, too small for either of them to fit through. Shiro was sure Matt had picked this room specifically for that reason, no way to escape. Giving up on that idea, they resorted to searching for a light switch, their eyes adjusting enough to see outlines in the darkness but not much else. The tension in the room was palpable, neither of them trusting themselves to address the elephant in the room, why they were locked in here in the first place, they both knew what Matt had said was true, but were not willing to address it as the problem it was. Until the pressure got the better of them.

“I’m sorry.” you both blurted out at the same time. Fumbling to recover, you turned to continue, but your foot caught on the bucket Shiro had knocked over earlier, sending you sprawling on the floor.

“(Y/N)! Are you okay?!” Shiro asked rushing over to where he had heard you fall. Unfortunately, instead of helping you, he stepped on your hand. You cried out again, cradling your hand to your chest as you pushed back against the wall, pulling your knees in. Shiro’s heart felt like it was in his throat, how had he managed to mess this up even more?

“Oh God, (Y/N) I’m so sorry!” he stammered his panic rising up. Standing where he was he ran a shaking hand through his hair. He didn’t dare move again, scared that he would accidentally hurt you again, instead he decided to speak, and once he started, he couldn’t stop, everything just poured out of his mouth.

“This is all my fault. I just really like you, and you’re so pretty, and smart, and when you smile it makes my stomach go crazy, and you’re laugh, oh god, your laugh! It’s the best thing I’ve ever heard! It’s just so hard for me to think when you’re around, my brain goes all fuzzy and I can’t focus on anything else. God, I should have known better, i should have tried harder to hide my feelings, or i should have transfered as soon as I realized I loved you, and, and now we are stuck in here, and you’re hurt and-” in the darkness, you made out his outline, and rose to your feet, equal parts shocked and thrilled to hear what he was saying. Reaching out you placed your hand on the side of his face, rendering him silent. You couldn’t see his face, and you prayed he couldn’t see yours, you could feel your cheeks reddening as you drew closer. He could feel you coming closer, your hand gliding over his face, your fingertips tracing the outline of his lips. You felt his warm breath against your fingers, as you moved your hand to the base of his neck, standing on your toes. You hesitated, your lips stopping just shy of his.

Swallowing his nerves, Shiro closed the remaining distance, capturing your lips with his. In that moment it was like a fire was lit between you. His hands were on you in an instant, pulling you closer as his mouth moved against yours. Pressing forward, you stumbled back, your shoulders hitting the metal walls of the room hard. Shiro only paused for a moment before he was on you again, pinning your body to the wall with his own. His fingers gripped your sides, pawing at the material of your uniform. Pressing closer, he fit himself against you, a leg between yours, his hips against yours, like fitting puzzle pieces together. His lips pulled away from yours, only to attach to the exposed skin on your neck. He groaned into the hollow of your neck, as you raked your fingers through his hair, pulling on it slightly.

The heat between you continued to grow, and the once cold room felt like a furnace. So consumed in the moment, you both failed to notice the door to the room slide open. Matt caught site of the two of you, and paused for just a moment, as his mind registered the situation. Shaking his head, he crossed his arms over his chest, before clearing his throat. And just as quickly as it had started, the trance was broken. Shiro tore his body away from yours, his hair was sticking up in odd directions from where you fingers had mused it. While you pushed yourself off the wall, trying to stop your knees from shaking, and straighten your uniform at the same time, the small marks on your neck beginning to form. Both of your lips were swollen, and your faces were red, and in Matt’s opinion, you both looked thoroughly kissed. An amused smile pulled at Matt’s lips as he watched the two of you fumble to compose yourselves. No one spoke for a long moment, until finally, Matt broke the ice.

“Well,” he began, his voice eerily calm. “I can’t say that I didn’t see this coming, cause I did, and for that reason, I planned ahead. Because if ‘this’” he gestured between the two of you quirking an eyebrow. “Is going to happen, there need to be some ground rules.” stepping forward, he reached into his bag and pulled out a large 3 ring binder, shoving it into Shiro’s chest, who caught it quickly, looking down at the cover.

“‘Rules and guidelines of dating a teammate’” he read aloud, lifting his eyes questioningly to Matt.

“Volume 1?” you read over Shiro’s arm. “How many volumes are there?” you asked watching Shiro flip through the pages, each filled with words, and some having charts and pictures… this was obviously something Matt had put time into, and it definitely took longer than the hour they had been in there.

“There are 2 others back in my room, but I haven’t finished editing them.” Matt answered calmly. You nearly choked, and Shiro swallowed thickly, his eyes wide. Indifferent, Matt continued. “Also, there will be a quiz, so I would suggest going on a ‘study date’ instead of making out in a janitor’s closet.” you heaved a sigh, before turning your eyes to Shiro, a smile pulled at you lips, despite the obvious dislike of the situation.

“I’m free tonight.” you said, Shiro’s heart skipped a beat. He would read 50 of Matt’s ridiculous rule books, if it meant he got to see you smile like that again.

New toy II pt.2

Jungkook x reader

genre: smut, fluff, angst, sub!jungkook

also some thigh riding 

word count: 10.2k


What is a better occasion for some nasty actions than a blackout?

Originally posted by nochuie

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The Storm

Request: Numbers 1, 16, 17, for the top thing. Theydon’t have to be in the same fic.

1.“I said I’m hungry, not horny. But now that you mention it…”

17.“The power’s out. We have two options. Have sex, or I got ‘Back to the Future’ on my laptop.”

Request: hi! idk if you’ve already done this (im sorry if you have!) but it would be cute if peter and the reader could have a movie marathon? like hp or something. i know its not much but I hope you could find somewhere to go with it!

A/N: I decided to combine these two requests because I thought I could make some magic with them. Also sorry, I know nothing about Harry Potter so I didn’t really include much of it in the fic. ~Also, let me know if you want a part 2 to this, (I am open to writing smut guys)~

Word Count: 1355

Warnings: N/A

Part 2

Masterlist

Peter Parker was one of your best friends. Ned always called him the love of your life, jokingly of course. But, Ned was right. Kind of? You were in love with Peter.

Usually every Friday night, you, Peter, and Ned would ave movie night. Peter would come home early from being Spiderman and you would all watch movies at one of your houses.

Today you were supposed to go to Ned’s house, but he went away with his parents for the weekend so you and Peter had yet to decide what your plans were.

You and Pete were sitting in chemistry working on a lab when your nudged him “Hey Parker what are we doing tonight,”

“Christ, Y/N, you almost made me spill this sulphuric acid,”

You looked up to Peter who had his googles on and was holding a test tube filled with sulphuric acid, going to pour it into a beaker. (Lol I’ve spilt sulphuric acid on my hands multiple times cause my science teacher would never give us gloves to wear during labs).

“Whoops, sorry,”

“You can come over to my house tonight. Aunt May’s out with friends for the weekend so we’ll have the place to ourselves,” Peter said

“Perfect. I’ll come over around 6pm? And, being the generous friend I am, i’ll bring the pizza,”

“Sounds good,”

After school, you went home and tried to do some of your homework, but you couldn’t focus. Movie nights with Peter (and Ned) were the best part of your week. If Peter didn’t have to go out and be Spiderman you would already be at Peter’s apartment, sitting together watching movies.

But since that wasn’t the case. You patiently waited a few hours before heading to Peter’s.

Before leaving you threw your pjs, and some movies into your backpack. Regretting the decision of promising Peter pizza, you decided to just order some to his apartment.

When you arrived at Peter’s apartment, you knew he would have left the door unlocked for you so you walked right in.

“Honey, I’m home!” You said, walking inside. You dropped your things and walking over to join Peter on the couch.

“Man, its pouring outside,” you continued.

“Welcome home, honey. Yeah, the rain had kind of prevented me from being Spidey tonight. You could have come over earlier,”

“Well thanks for the heads up Parker,”

“Sorry. But did you bring anything for me?” Peter asked

“Bring you anything like what?”

“Well, i’m very hungry,”

“Well if you’re horny I could definitely help you out with that, but I thought we were going to have a movie marathon?”

“Oh my god Y/N. I said I’m hungry, not horny. But now that you mention it…”

You opened your mouth to respond, but before you could get a word out there was a knock at the door.

“Pizza’s here. Looks like that’ll solve one of your problems,”

You grabbed your wallet, paid the pizza man and then brought the box over to Peter on the couch.

“What movies are we watching tonight?”

“I put Harry Potter in the dvd player. You feel like watching that?”

“Sure,” you nodded.

Peter turned on the movie and the two of you sat on the couch. You only made it 20 minutes into the movie when the lights started flickering.

“That doesn’t seem good,” you said.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Peter said, moving his attention back to the movie.

You rolled your eyes, knowing a storm like this would most definitely knock out the power.

Sure enough, a few minutes later the power went out.

The apartment went silent as the tv shut off. You could hear thunder rumbling in the distance. It was pitch black besides the occasional flash of lightning outside.

“Told you,” you muttered.

You didn’t have to see Peter to know he was rolling his eyes.

“What now?” Your asked.

“Well, the power’s out. We have two options. Have sex, or I got ‘Back to the Future’ on my laptop.” Peter said.

“I mean, we already explored the idea of sex so that seems like the best idea. I’m down,”

“If Ned were here would that still be the best idea?” Peter asked

“I mean, if Ned wouldn’t mind sitting out here while we fuck in your bedroom, then sure,” you joked.

Peter laughed “Back to the Future?”

“Sure,” you agreed.

Peter disappeared for a moment, making his way to his bedroom to find his laptop.

There was a loud bang and you heard Peter say “Fuck,”

You laughed, knowing Peter must have walked into something.

“Thanks for asking if I’m okay,” Peter said, walking back into the room.

“You’re spiderman. I’m supposed to be worried about you walking in the dark now?”

“A little concern would be nice,”

Peter came and sat down beside you. You were leaning on him, as he placed his laptop on his lap and looked for the movie.

“Hey Pete,”

“Mmhmm,” Peter mumbled, still searching his laptop.

“You know I wasn’t lying when I said I was down,”

“What?” Peter asked

“I wasn’t lying when I said I was down,”

“No, I heard what you said I just… I don’t believe you,”

“You don’t believe me?”

“No,”

“Why not?” You asked.

You felt like you had made a fool of yourself to Peter. You had just admitted that you would be open to doing things with Peter and all he had to say was that he thought you were lying.

“Come on, Y/N. We joke about this all the time. We joke about sex and being in a relationship and living happily ever after one day. But we joke, I’ve accepted that that’s not actually going to happen because we’re just friends and you don’t feel that way about me,”

“Have you ever thought that maybe I actually do feel that way about you?”

“Don’t joke about that Y/N, you could never like someone like me,”

“What on earth are you talking about Peter?”

“I mean you’re so amazing, how on earth could you actually like me? You’re just fucking with me. It’s really not that funny,”

“Peter i’m not fucking with you, but I would like to fuck you. Jesus Christ, Peter. I have feelings for you,”

“Wait… you do?” Peter asked

“Yes!” You exclaimed.

“I have feelings for you too, Y/N,”

“So about that ‘best idea’…” you said, raising your eyebrows in a suggestive way.

Peter laughed “I mean, like you said, I’m down,”

“Then what are you waiting for Parker?”

Peter quickly placed his laptop on the coffee table in front of him and leaned down to kiss you. He moved his lips against yours, using his teeth to lightly nip at your bottom lip.

He moved his hands to your waist, so they were slightly riding up your shirt.

You pulled away, “You could at least take me to your bedroom before you tried to take your clothes off,”

Peter laughed, “As you wish, my dear,”

Peter stood up and offered you his hand. You graciously took it and let him lead you to his bedroom.

“Man I am so happy Ned’s away this weekend,” You said.

Caged (5)

Synopsis: What happens when Loki meets someone who actually calls him on his bullshit instead of running and hiding?
Word Count : 1017
A/N: Please send me some prank ideas for the next part, I don’t feel like I have nearly enough in it! Also hit me up with your thoughts and feels?

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four

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Owl post - Part 2

Part 1


Harry shifts uncomfortably from one foot to the other, while looking at a dumbfounded Malfoy. Maybe he should have thought this whole thing through first. He apparated over here without even thinking of how he would explain to Malfoy what he’s doing here, how he even knows where Malfoy lives. There’s no way he can tell him he followed his owl one day, not being able to contain his curiosity any longer. It’s a wonder Malfoy didn’t spot him on his broom that day.

“Potter,” Malfoy simply says.

“Um,” Harry begins, “you’re probably wondering what I’m doing here.”

The sound of Harry’s voice seems to shake Malfoy out of his trance. His whole body tenses and his eyes narrow.

“How did you find me?”

Harry smiles awkwardly and scratches the back of his neck.

“Well, that’s a funny story, actually,” Harry laughs nervously. “Do you think I could tell you over a cup of tea?”

“This is just like you,” Malfoy growls, “inviting yourself in like that. Does it ever occur to you, oh mighty Saviour, that other people have lives of their own and don’t answer at your beck and call?”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Harry snorts, “am I keeping you from staring at your wall all day?”

Harry inwardly flinches. He didn’t mean to say that. His mind just snapped. Like it used to, whenever Malfoy was around. Maybe he will have to change tactics and just try to be… charming? But how does one do that exactly?

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