i know that all my shits cool

Please don’t be angry at Katze everyone, we all know this isn’t her doing. She’s just the admin they give the least shits about and they know we’re pretty cool as far as me/yellow paws go. They knew that I likely would not lash out at Katze for this reason, as I’ve been pretty vocal about my distaste and contempt for the co-founders before.

This was very much a calculated move.

My new meds make my skin throw a fit. It’s not terribly bad, just a few things here and there, but it’s bumming me out because I’ve never really had too many run-ins with acne.

My four-year-old sister, however, is under the impression that it’s just “3D freckles”, and that they look very, very pretty. She wants all of my freckles to “pop out”, especially the ones across my nose; they’re her favourite.

And it puts me in this weird position where I can’t say, “No, this is acne, and it’s bad,” because I don’t want to teach her that it’s a bad to have unclear skin, you know? I tried to tell her that my skin was sick because of the new medicine, but she was having none of it. She didn’t think they were any different than all of my literal, actual freckles, despite my efforts to delicately tell her otherwise.

Kids are weird.

The more I think about interactions I have with children, the more I realise that children will consistently compliment “flaws” until they’ve been taught not to.

Like, a kid at the library, whose sister has vitiligo, saw my scars once and suggested that his sister and I should be cats for Halloween, since I have “tabby skin” and she has “calico skin”. “I can be a black cat,” he immediately added. “It’s not AS cool, but they’re the spookiest.”

When I started losing weight, my little brother immediately demanded that I gain it back, because I wasn’t as comfortable to cuddle with anymore.

And my other little sister always wants to wear her paint-stained clothes to school so that “everyone can tell [she’s] an artist”.

I don’t know. I guess talking to little kids just reminds me that all of this superficial shit we worry about really is 100% made up.

no text post could’ve accurately depicted the fondness in their voices during this part of the new minecraft let’s play

Things Said/Heard at Rocky Horror Rehearsal

Note: due to the nature of RHPS, a lot of these are somewhat risque, albeit in a sorta cracky way. Nothing here has to lead to direct NSFW, but doing so would be pretty easy. (So’s Janet!)

  • “It’s okay. My lungs are still in my body. I’m good.”
  • “I have plans for your fake dick.”
  • “It doesn’t matter! Nothing matters! Just form a kickline!”
  • “Please yourselves. Not literally. At least, not on stage.”
  • “This is why we keep the feather boas in quarantine.”
  • “You- you’re a lot. I like you.”
  • “This is when you start to get groovy.”
  • “I could kiss you. I could marry you. I could buy you ice cream.”
  • “IT’S WEDNESDAY NIGHT. WHO’S READY TO GET SLUTTY?”
  • “Shit, I thought this was water polo practice.”
  • “Biochemical research gets me so hot.
  • “This is the weirdest aerobics session I’ve ever seen.”
  • “I claim my prize.”
  • “I haven’t been this aroused since Nixon was president.”
  • “Where are the horses? I thought there would be horses.”
  • “I need you to channel your inner vodka aunt. I need you to channel your inner 10,000 vodka aunts.”
  • “Make it weirder. I know it’s weird. But make it weirder.”
  • “You’re, like, a sex god. You’re like a Nobel Prize winner sex god.”
  • “I like to approach all my problems crotch-first.”
  • “Okay, who here knows the Funky Chicken?”
  • “I’m so proud of you. You’re going to make me cry.”
  • “Anyone have a tampon?”
  • “Anyone have a hair band?”
  • “Anyone have any idea what’s going on?”
  • “There will be no actual nudity and no actual murder-cannibalism- at least, if everything goes according to plan.”
  • “Where’s the glitter and why is everyone sober?”
  • “Don’t worry about me. I’m having a good time.”
  • “You fuck with my boas, I will fuck with you.”
  • “It’s all cool. Nothing is on fire. Yet.”
  • “We’re allowed to step on you if you’re in the way.”
  • “OH SHIT MY TITS ARE OUT”
  • “I’m glad that we dream about each other in the worst possible ways.”
  • “It’s awful. I love it.”
  • “You. Me. Selfie. Now.”
  • “Feel this fabric. Now imagine it rubbing against your nipples. Frantically.”
  • “We are not responsible for any weird boners you may get this evening.”
  • “You guys, I just- I just love you so much. I’m so happy. You guys.”

hanzo is and will remain the most beautiful dude ive ever seen, like have u seen that jawline and those goddamn cheekbones????

also idk how to draw bows for shit so please accept the fuckery and embrace it like I did to my lack of skill thank you.

How BTS flirts:

Namjoon: “Hey, baby. You’ve got one hell of a personality, wanna go get dinner some time?”

Seokjin: “I’m hot, you are hot; let’s go cool off together ;)”

Yoongi: “Flirting? Nahhh”

Hoseok: “HEY DO YOU WANNA HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WHERE WE CAN HUG AND KISS AND HOLD HANDS?? Shit, too forward…”

Jimin: *gets all flustered and blushy*

Taehyung: “You know, you look like a fictional character I like”

Jungkook: *watches from a distance and groans in angst*

Ellie Lee: let’s take a pic looking cool.
Jin: I’m a mother fucking bad ass look at my fake ass gun I will fuck u up with just one finger
Namjoon: if looks could impregnate you’d be pregnant 85 times already
Taehyung: sit on my face
Jeon: look at all the fucks I give
Yoongi: soft swagger thumbs up
Jimin: I don’t know whats going on but I’m going to just act cute 🤗
Hoseok: I’m here to fuck shit up hashtag fuck bitches and get money hashtag mister steal your girl hashtag where’s the weed

2

Jackal belongs to @raythrill 

In Regards to the VLD Recent Age Confirmation

Keith is 18

Lance is 17

Keith and Lance dating? Cool beans bro I totally get it. You know, Klance art is some of the best art I’ve seen.

Keith is 18

Shiro is 25

Keith and Shiro dating? Cool beans bro I totally get it. You know, Sheith art is the fuckin bomb even if there may be less of it.

Any ship ever in Voltron? Cool beans bro I totally get it

Shalladin? Cool beans bro I totally get it

Not shipping anything and caring about other stuff? Cool beans bro I totally get it

Multishipping? Cool beans bro that’s one of the better ways to go about this (other than not getting involved at all).

Party at my place, let’s talk this shit out. we can all choose to ship whatever we want, and not wanting to ship anything is totally cool as well. Let’s chill in a blow up baby pool, eat some pizza, and maybe have a civil exchange. Thank

I think a moment that really struck me about the importance of representation was when I made my asexual friend cry.

I have a book I’ve written, that I just haven’t posted anywhere out of fear. The leading lady is a pansexual/romantic trans girl cop, and she has a best friend in the coroner who’s an asexual sex repulsed homoromantic cis girl that really likes lizards. I would send my asexual friend the chapters to beta, because I’m not ace and I don’t want to fuck up anything.

The entire time she would mention loving their interactions (she wasn’t subtle about shipping it at all) and I, very excitedly gave her the chapter where said asexual character admitted to her father figure she was in love with the leading lady. She spent a good couple of pages freaking out about asking her out “I know she’s cool with me being asexual but what if she’s not cool dating an asexual? What if she takes it as an insult??” etc. Basic shit I thought almost all media with ace characters would cover.

Later, she calls me on skype, and is literally fucking crying. Apperently, ace media rarely considers ace people still having romantic feelings and almost never covers the difficulty, the fear, the nervousness. She said that character resonated so hard with her, it felt like she got hit in the chest and it proved to her I did care about people like her.

When I explained that I wasn’t even trying, it just felt natural to write she started bawling more and fucking begged me to keep writing especially ace/aro characters.

It was the most touching thing that ever happened to me.

Out of Context Quotes from My Physics Teacher
  • “I wanna do this fast. It’s not fun going slow, it’s not sex.”
  • “Scalar quantities: They just have a number with no… (mutters to self) rhymes with erection… direction!
  • “It’s like herpes: If you don’t need it, give it back.”
  • “I know you’re asking: Where do I get all my energy? And the answer is: Meds.”
  • “I’m glad Hermione is getting older. I’ve always had a thing for her since she was like (laughs)…six.”
  • “You were lucky enough to see my balls dropping. And if you didn’t, it was pretty cool.”
  • “I actually dressed up as a woman to go to a bachelorette party.”
  • “Gravity goes up and down, bitches.”
  • (My favorite) “Bro-child.”
  • “Oh, and when I say disturbing shit like that, you’re not going home and telling your parents that, right?”
  • He also will give out Jamba Juice gift cards for completion of extra credit problems.
  • “Is this alcohol?” he asks as he brings out a spray bottle with the taped on label ‘denatured alcohol’. Bringing a lighter out of his pocket, he lights it and holds it out of the nozzle before spraying the flame. The flame flares up and burns his hand. “Ow.”
Random One Line Prompts

- “You made me cookies?”
- “Everything we stand for ment nothing after all.”
- “You stole what?”
- “You aren’t pathetic.”
- “A dragon ate your homework?”
- “I was suppose die you dumb ass!”
- “You looked at me differently.”
- “You work at a zoo now? Neat.”
- “I’m being dead serious. I’m a vampire.”
- “I’m not pregnant!”
- “So instead of being normal, you started a revolution?”
- “You found a child?”
- “Oh c'mon you would have murdered that guy too.”
- “The stars are pretty tonight, aren’t they?”
- “You ever seen something as cool as this?”
- “You never did understand the concept of being wrong.”
- “So wait- hold up- you’re a mermaid?”
- “I thought you were dead!”
- “I know you love me and all but stop threatening the doctor.”
- “How. THE FUCK. Are you- so motherfucking tall?”
- “Did you just? You just- oh my god!”
- “Everywhere I go there is this crow! I’m telling you!”
- “ You fell in love with a vampire prince and didn’t bother to tell me?”
- “I shit you not.”
- “You? You know how to shoot a gun?”
- “My man, I am high as a kite right now.”
- “You aren’t leaving here without telling me who hurt you so I can take out a can of whoop ass and unleash it on their ass!”
- “You just kissed me.”
- “But you hate avocados.”
- “I may be a vampire but I am a vampire of the sun, not the moon.”
- “Hold up- just stop- just- what are you actually doing? It’s 2 AM!”

  • McQueen’s crash was really fucking brutal like god damn they did such a good job with that scene like I know everyone is all “oh haha he dies” but sitting in the theater watching it happen you just feel paralyzed because holy shit. Anyways, major kudos to Pixar for making that probably my favorite scene in the whole movie because of the beautiful cinematography.
  • Jackson Storm!!! I thought I was gonna hate him, and I did he is a grade A jackass, but just oh man he’s just so fucking cool and sleek and the black and blue coloring is sooo good. Yes I hate him but also I love him. 
  • The colors of all the new gen racers were so great!! They were all so sleek and shiny and cool looking and colorful!
  • At first I didn’t really like Cruz, she kinda bugged me in the overly happy kind of way, but that didn’t remain the case because OH MY GOD I’M SO PROUD OF MY DAUGHTER!!!
  • McQueen doing the warm up exercises to get Cruz to come with him was so great. McQueen is A+ dad material.
  • McQueen mentoring Cruz on the beach without even realizing he’s mentoring her gave me life. 
  • The entire demolition derby. 
  • I was honestly expecting the school bus to be a guy so I was absolutely ecstatic that it ended up being a girl!! Anyways, I love Miss Fritter she’s fantastic and amazing and so badass.
  • Fritter trying to straight up kill McQueen and then later while being interviewed being all exited and saying how she’s always liked McQueen was so cute.
  • “Racing wasn’t the best part of Doc’s life, you were.” 
  • I can’t believe Doc Hudson is a gay icon.
  • I make a post about a week ago predicting that Cruz would race in McQueen’s place AND I WAS RIGHT, I WAS RIGHT, I WAS RIGHT!!!
  • McQueen up on the platform with the headset on coaching Cruz almost broke me I was flipping the fuck out oh my god he was the splitting image of Doc it was amazing.
  • Cruz doing the wall flip trick. I had a fucking conniption fit it was so good it was perfect it was, although a bit predicable, absolutely astounding. 
  • Cruz took Doc’s number. So good. What a way to bring it full circle. 

okay im sorry but ive been reading wayyyyy too many superhero AU’s but can we just step back and imagine for a second:

  • Nico di Angelo being able to manipulate the shadows and get to McDonalds before anyone else.
  • Chiron being a leader of like 50 kids, all with superhero powers
  • Chiron making rules like no interaction with civilians, whats so ever
  • And Nico being like ‘okay, cool. i dont really give a fuck’
  • but then will motherfucking solace
  • saves his ass from something, probably from not eating enough since will is always looking out for others
  • will being a fucking intern or something at a hospital and one day realizing holy shit i can heal people with my hands this shit aint normal but refusing to tell anyone since it’s like Xavier’s school for gifted kids you dont know and they find you
  • but no one finds will until nico saves his ass
  • nico accidentally being hit by a bus or something and will already being at the scene and is like holy shit that’s the hot guy that saved me from a mugger or something
  • and then he, like, makes up some lie and drags nico’s body off the street or whatever and something happened and he’s like “okay, dont freak out”
  • and then he juST HEALS HIM AND NICO’S LIKE WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
  • but nico doesnt tell will about the camp or whatever because he wants him to have a normal life 
  • but eventually will gets too nosy and follows nico after a freaking date or something and sees this shit and is like. what. the. fuck
  • and nico has to make up an excuse
  • they make a freaking emergency demigod ambulance thing
  • making out in superhero suits
    im sorry i just cant get it out of my head
Shout out to all the people who regularly suffer from migraines

For those who have experienced the panic of that nasty, clawing little pain behind one eye and knowing what’s coming next.

To all the people who know what it’s like to have a thudding headache that makes you want to claw your way back into the earth to escape it.

The feeling of having a concrete block with sharp edges constantly rubbing the back of one eyeball.

To fear standing up from a bed or chair in case of blackouts or tunnel vision.

For those forced to pray to the porcelain god for the crime of sleeping a little too long or daring to go out and have fun.

For those who have puked till their stomachs were as empty and bile ridden as a Donald Trump speech. And yet your body still hates you.

To all those who understand the joy of a dark, silent bedroom. Or a hot, refreshing shower. Or a comfy sofa and cool towel over the eyes….and a bucket in easy reach.

To all those who know that an aspirin won’t do jack shit, but thanks for offering. Those who know how addictive Codine is.

For those who have had to give up fun activities or days out and been laid low on birthdays and special occasions because of it.

I wouldn’t wish migraines on my worst enemy, but you are strong and I send you hugs and best wishes for a speedy recovery. May your pillows be cool, your Migraleave be quick and effective, and your families be understanding.

ziam side of tumblr im abt to learn you a thing

sooo we all know our fave disney prince aka zayn malik has SEVERAL tattoos as an ode to his sunshine puppy boy payne right?

the most famous being this beauty

now im a desi woman and here on tumblr we’ve allll talked about mandalas and their significance in pakistani weddings and brides etc. ALL TRUE OFC.

but i was stumped to see how many posts hadnt made this connection

know how zaynie’s got a nose piercing right? and everyone thought oh wow what a cool dude hes so edgy with all the tattoos and now the piercing

mmmm think again

notice one more thing about pakistani brides?

see that giant ass nose ring? yup
now i know what you might think
THAT looks painful (i assure you it isnt)

point being MOST pakistani brides get their noses pierced before their wedding

its a tradition that has been followed in our culture for generations now

my own nose is pierced (im unmarried)

and i shit you not the next day (after getting my nose pierced) when i went to work i was teased the ENTIRE day abt how i really got engaged on the DL or am getting married (i didnt)

only then did i make the connection: OH pakistani women get their noses pierced when they are of age to be married OR are married (more likely)

notice how its on the left side of my nose? (its a selfie so flip it) thats exactly how its done

we legit frown at non-desi ppl when they get it done on the wrong side lol (pls dont come for me)

GETTING BACK TO THE TOPIC AT HAND:

yup left side of his nose (also proves how someone else took this hot half naked pic lol but nvm)

lets go back to the mandala (yes pls)

the main difference between that tattoo and the mehendi that brides get is the permanence

but fret not thats a big sign for good things in the ziam world

there is this myth or old wives’ tale in my culture that the stronger the colour of a woman’s mehendi (henna) the stronger the love her husband has for her

so basically whenever i used to get mehendi done i’d test my boyfriend lmao

bitch you better love me my hands tell me different

anywho needless to say zaynie didnt half arse it: he got a fucking permanent version of the wedding tattoo

basically his way of saying: you’re tied to me now bitch you better love me forever

i mean why not.

now put it ALLLL together

HES LITERALLY WALKING AROUND LOOKING LIKE A PAKISTANI MARRIED WOMAN

this here is the reason i now fully believe in ziam

i was oblivious to all this but the moment i saw a picture of him with his tattoo and piercing my mind went WAIT A MINUTE

so there you go peeps

its realer than you think

We were fighting a pack of wolves in a clearing and our bounty hunter, Flux, was just bitten on the arm, which then prompted him to flip off the wolf.

Flux: Flux moves closer to both wolves and casts sword burst. A circle of spectral blades appear sweep around him ((Each wolf makes a Dex save

DM: wolf 1 got 8, wolf 3 got 18        

Delain(ooc): wolf 3 flips you off, now realizing it was meant to offend, mid jump

Bariz(ooc): Wolf 3 makes a skateboard appear out of the air and does a sick kickflip while flipping you off

DM: wolf 3 tries to do a middle finger, and finds its toes not flexible enough. wolf 3 is disappointed at that

Bariz(ooc): Wolf 3 does its best attempt at flipping you off and we all applaud and let it know it was a good try

Bariz: I applaud wolf 3 for its attempt at flipping off Flux

Delain(ooc): do we get inspired from wolf 3’s performance?

DM: the wolves get inspired

Me(ooc): damn it

External image

When I’m in a group and someone says an inside joke that I don’t understand but everyone else laughs at it and I just wanna seem like I belong

it’s always sunny in philadelphia sentence starters!

❝ Could we not base our decisions on what does and doesn’t happen in episodes of Scooby-Doo? ❞
❝ Look at me, psychological damage up to here! ❞
❝ I have contained my rage for as long as possible, but I shall unleash my fury upon you like the crashing of a thousand waves! ❞
❝ Am I gay for God? You betcha. ❞
❝ Be gone, vile man! Be gone from me! ❞
❝ Well first of all, through God all things are possible, so jot that down. ❞
❝ Yeah, but we didn’t come here to play with  stray dogs and trash, man. ❞
❝ Oh, get a job? Just get a job? Why don’t I strap on my job helmet and squeeze into a job cannon and fire off into job land where jobs grow on jobbies?! ❞
❝ I’m eating because I’m very uncomfortable. ❞
❝ I’m gonna have a really hard time if we’re both cannibals and racists. ❞
❝ I dropped my monster condom that I use for my magnum dong. ❞
❝ Everybody’s dying, bitch. Let’s get you some fruit. ❞
❝ When I’m dead, just throw me in the trash. ❞
❝ I will smack your face off of your face! ❞
❝ Take care of yourself… or whatever people say. ❞
❝ We all have cats we’d like to be playing with right now. ❞
❝ I will eat your babies, bitch! ❞
❝ I’m relaxing, I’m getting blackout drunk, and you’re leaving me alone. ❞
❝ Later, boners! ❞
❝ Do not call these shorts white trash! ❞
❝ If some old boner gives me attitude, I’m gonna spit in his face. ❞
❝ I eat stickers all the time, dude! ❞
❝ I’ve got the stride of a gazelle. A beautiful, beautiful gazelle person. ❞
❝ You know, you light one bitch on fire and everyone freaks out! ❞
❝ Cats do not abide by the laws of nature, you don’t know shit about cats. ❞
❝ If you don’t have car insurance, you better have dental, because I am going to smash your teeth into dust! ❞
❝ I can go from flaccid to erect in a moment’s notice. ❞
❝ I mean, trees? Everywhere trees?! What the hell is this place? ❞
❝ I’ll tell you what’s not cool: crashing my car into a building, exploding a grenade inside of it, and then convincing your friends and family that you’re dead! ❞
❝ Oh my God! She just ate an entire sleeve of Chips Ahoy! ❞
❝ Hello fellow American, this you should vote me. I leave power. Good. Thank you, thank you. If you vote me, I’m hot. Taxes, they’ll be lower… son. The democratic vote is the right thing to do, so do. ❞
❝ I stepped in front of a bus and it missed me. I can’t even get a bus to hit on me. ❞
❝ I’m having feelings again, like some kind of fourteen year old kid or something. ❞
❝ I don’t think these dogs have masters, I think they play by their own rules. ❞
❝ I have a bleached asshole! ❞
❝ With real power comes real responsibility and I don’t want to do any of that shit. I just want the money… and the illusion of power. ❞