i know not all feminists are like this

anonymous asked:

lmao all the articles and tumblr thinkpieces about how thor ragnarok is the 'queerest & most feminist superhero movie ever' have been driving me nuts. i like the director but he was very unenthusiastic when he was asked about valkyrie, saying he made sure it wasn’t specific & he didn’t feel the need to get everyone on board with her being bi or a lesbian, very 'maybe she's bi who knows???'. the big deal people made about the ‘first lgbt mcu character’ feels so undeserved lol

I didn’t see most of that thank god bc I would feel the same as you. I do feel like the entire glowing reception around Ragnarok ignores like… a lot of important context, like, I can’t believe I’m apparently the only person on the internet mad that Tessa Thompson never got a real name, and I think the precedent they set by writing out Jane should concern anyone who has ever liked a woman in the MCU, Tessa’s character included, and I am definitely not going to give anyone credit for queer rep because they had Tessa look very sad when another unnamed woman died.

The movie was a lot of fun, it was very funny but… yeah, basically, every thinkpiece hailing it as mega progressive makes me feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

I keep seeing this meme going around.  I’m sure you’ve seen it, too.  For example:

This is just further justifying creepy male behavior, right?  Am I wrong?  I’ve seen a whole bunch of them over the past week, and I generally only follow very liberal, feminist leaning blogs, and yet, here are jokes where the only thing that has agency is the man, and the two women he’s with are turned into objects, robbed of their humanity, and silenced, it’s gross.  Not only are the women seen as purely pleasure/sexual objects for the… I don’t know, protagonist seems like the wrong word, but…  They are also pitted against one another, as rivals for the all important central idea’s attention/affection.  I can’t help but be disgusted by it. 

Can we stop?  

This week I had a lovely conversation with an older dyke who reminded me how much a lot of people have always hated TERFs and SWERFs. 

She was talking about the time in the 1970s and 1980s when she was a young radical dyke and how many of the awesome dykes in the radical scene were trans women. So I asked her if there was ever any problem with TERFs and SWERFs. She didn’t know those words so I described them. Her reply was (paraphrasing a longer conversation):

“Oh, you mean the political lesbians? That’s what we called them at the time, no one really considered them radical. They hated everyone. They hated bisexual women who dated men. They hated us leather dykes and kinky dykes because they thought we were ‘copying the patriarchy’, they hated trans women. None of us in the radical scene liked them. A lot of them later left and admitted that they were straight but were presured to identify as lesbians in that group because being a feminist to them meant cutting all ties with men. They were like a cult. They often lived together and if you didn’t walk the political line you were dead to them. Intense stuff. ”

And like, I know her memories don’t have global relevance and there have also been places where TERFs had a much more prominent impact on the local radical women’s community, but still, to hear how despised these TERFs have always been by these truly radical dykes cheered me up a lot. 

Howdy everybody! I recently made a post that was uh… ahem… “controversial”, where I told all Trump supporters, MAPS (Minor Attracted People), TERFS (Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminists), and Nazis to leave my blog. This post resulted in me losing several followers, and I think I received another death threat too😅. I would like to apologise for, welp, nothing really😄. That post (and this one hopefully) was designed SPECIFICALLY to upset those people and get them to unfollow/block me! My blog is a safe space, and I don’t want anyone from any hateful organizations to be able to comment on my posts (especially considering that I know many of my followers are oppressed people).

When I first lost some followers, I was really really bummed. But one of my followers reminded me via DMs that if those followers left me because of that post, then they must have been members of those organizations, so good riddance to them! Now if anything, I’m bummed that there were people following me that sympathized with terfs, nazis, etc, and I’m really glad they’re gone!

Sooooo….. if you are offended by me making this post (or gasp!! Posting something “political"😨😨) please unfollow!!!! Just leave!! The same goes if you are anti-lgbtqia+! If you have ever hated someone for something that has no effect on you, is out of their control, or you harm people for no reason, OR SUPPORT SOMEONE WHO DOES,,,, then you do not deserve to look at my content👋!!!!! You can come back once you have learned👏to👏be👏a👏human👏being. Thanks for reading my really long post, and have a lovely day!! Peace!

(oh and by the way, feel free to reblog this to get rid of your hateful followers, trust me it really works! Stay safe out there💛!!)

  • <p> <b>straight feminists:</b> men are so horrible!! i'm going to kill them all with my eyeliner haha<p/><b>a lesbian:</b> yeah men suck<p/><b>straight feminists:</b> wow why are lesbians so hateful? you can't just generalize people like that!! i'll have you know my boyfriend samuel compliments my highlighter and has only called me a cunt three times<p/></p>

You know what? I really wish people were as hyped about Sonequa Martin-Green being the first Black woman to lead in a Star Trek series as they are about the D*ctor Wh* casting. But then again, most feminists don’t care about non-White women so it’s to be expected that most of you guys don’t care about the fact that she’s making history too. And when you factor in Michelle Yeoh, you get it doubly so. Last time I checked, this is a pretty big deal for the sci-fi genre too. 

What’s strange, to me, is people thinking that the D*ctor Wh* casting gives hope to all little girls when we know that’s not true. This issue is just so very layered and complex, but there is something particularly troubling about the fact that people think a White woman should be the symbol all little girls should look up to, regardless of their race. It’s so very arrogant to believe that little non-White girls will be represented by this woman that looks nothing like them. It’s very arrogant to think that little non-White girls should look up to the new Doctor as their new hero, especially knowing this casting is only a win for White women and White women only.

wlw deserve better than Supergirl

Honestly, I know you are all coming at Jeremy and rightfully so but screw Melissa in particular. Because she is the lead. She is the main character. She is the role model of the cast, above anyone else. She is the one who holds the most responsibility. Not only to be a good role model but to be a feminist because that is what the show and character is about. And not whatever she is because it certainly isn’t feminism. Like yeah, she went to a women’s march. Nice. Yet she openly mocks and ridicules wlw. When she is the star of the show and when taking in such an important role she signed up for all the extra responsibility. This is a show where she plays Supergirl, a female superhero. As a lead. And a show with wlw canon representation. She plays a character that is meant to be the embodiment of acceptance, open mindedness, female empowerment and feminism in general. Yet she was having fun being homophobic on camera, on purpose, at a convention about said show, for the fans to watch, knowing most of the audience is lgbt.

Like this isn’t even about ships. The actors were not simply mocking a ship when they did that. Or making a joke. They were mocking the concept behind it. They were mocking the fact so many wlw saw two women on tv and thought maybe they could be together, maybe they wouldn’t be straight. They were mocking these wlw viewing themselves as these characters or seeing them as characters validating their identity. They find that funny. Melissa, who is playing Supergirl and has become a role model to young girls everywhere, openly mocked women even daring to relate to those characters and hoping that they could end up together.

Young girls everywhere will see these actors they look up to that play characters they look up to mock wlw. These girls will feel like being attracted to girls is ridiculous and wrong. Because they saw these grown adults mock and invalidate it. This is a show for families and for young girls in particular. Having the cast do this is awful. It goes against everything the show should stand for. Everything Supergirl and Kara as a character should stand for.

Not to mention how it validates homophobia. It will validate homophobes everywhere. In fact, it already has. I’ve already seen so many homophobic posts because of this. Because the cast was homophobic so everyone thinks it is okay to be that way. Young people learn from media. Everyone knows that. Young people will watch this video and repeat such behavior. They will start to think being lgbt is bad. That shipping gay pairings is ridiculous. This validates all that negativity.

Basically, Melissa should get as much or even more backlash. Not because Jeremy isn’t to blame but because she supported such behavior. And not only that but she joined in. While not only being one of the characters in such ship, therefore someone these women admired, but also while being the lead character of the show

You know who was the only person there that showed any actual professionalism and female empowerment/feminism? Katie McGrath, who tried to give the lgbt fans watching, wlw in particular, validation despite the fact the rest of the cast were mocking them and her for doing so. She went against her cast to try and make sure these young girls knew it is okay and that they are valid. Bless her. Because she did not have to do that. In fact, if anyone should have done that it was Melissa, who again, is the lead and the biggest role model. Yet Katie went out of her way to be the only one to actually display a good set of morals and risk ridicule for the sake of being a good person. She was in a toxic and tbh weirdly aggressive homophobic environment with people she has to continue working with and still decided to speak up about it. That is being a good person.

And then we have Chris Wood mocking the situation again and interrupting Katie. Because of course, the guy that is playing the love interest of Supergirl would do something gross like that. Not only that, but it adds up with all the Mon-El issues that teach young girls that they should look for abusive disrespectful entitled lazy guys who do not listen to them and then they should spend their time babysitting the guys until they are sorta barely decent boyfriends. Oh, and that these guys should definitely be their whole world and priority. Very progressive. Not to mention this was the same guy that said he loved the negative things about this ship. Which really means he ships it because he enjoys the abuse.

The worst thing is they knew exactly what this would do. Jeremy was purposely insulting the fans as he looked straight at the camera and aggressively yelled it out. He was yelling out homophobic things not to joke around with the cast but directly at the lgbt audience. Melissa called mocking lgbt people “brave”. You know what is brave? To dare to identify as such. Or to dare to identify with a character on tv when you know they will never be written that way. Or to openly support a gay ship despite the fact they are either canon and treated horribly or they are never canon. That’s brave. Being openly homophobic? That has been standard behavior since forever. That’s bigoted and close minded. It’s cowardly, not brave.

And don’t get me started on how they wrote Sanvers into their show as an attempt to lure lgbt fans in and exploit them for views yet everyone in the crew/cast are clearly homophobic. The crew is included for the treatment of their canon lesbian ship. They know the lgbt fans are watching because there is a wlw ship yet they had no shame in being homophobic on camera for everyone to see. If anyone had any doubt about why they wrote Sanvers now they have confirmed it exists for ratings only. Because clearly, the concept of women loving women is not realistic enough for them. Melissa supporting Sanvers? A publicity stunt because she obviously loves mocking wlw and their ships.

Im not even going to get into Jeremy’s “apology” that was really him making himself sound like the victim and acting like lgbt fans were overreacting and dramatic about it. We apparently can’t take a joke. Okay, but maybe being homophobic isn’t a joke nor is it funny. We have to deal with homophobia every single day. It is something that oppresses us. It is something that is used against us in every way. Homophobia can literally threaten our lives yet somehow we are supposed to laugh about it like it’s hilarious? Oh yeah, how funny. Silly wlw thought for once two women could be in a relationship or that they could simply pretend they are in one. So funny. Hilarious.

Great role models. Amazing. The CW should be very proud. Somehow there’s only like 3 decent people in the cast now and only one of them is brave enough to speak up against homophobia. And it isn’t the lead actress that claims to be a feminist. No. She’s too busy being homophobic.

I’m gonna go on a quick rant on feminism/femininity and Disney here.

Originally posted by disneylandwheredreamscometrue

It just riles me up when people seem to get the idea that femininity means a lack of feminism. When people take a look at the girl in the pants and the girl in the ballgown and says the one in pants is more feminist and empowering than the one in the dress. The whole point of one of the many aspects of feminism is that as women we have the right to choose to be and wear whatever we want. A woman in a dress is just as feminist as a woman in a burqa, and they’re both just as feminist as a woman in a suit or a woman in a bikini. And beyond clothing, a woman who’s married and in love is just as feminist as a woman who’s single. Here’s where Disney comes in, no one princess is a better more feminist role model than another. It’s important to have more than one type of role model yes, but just because one girl likes to fight and another girl likes to sew, it doesn’t mean that one is a better role model. All the princesses and other Disney ladies have good values to teach us and our kids in different ways and I’m gonna go through them with you.

Originally posted by badxbaby

Snow White:

For one thing this girl is 14. She is a child and her outlook on the world and her dreams in life shouldn’t be measured up to an adult’s. She’s kind, caring, and yes, she does dream of true love’s kiss. But she’s 14. When I was 14 I was dreaming of the same damn thing. But what we can learn from her is that when you care for everyone, even strangers, you’ll see that kindness returned. When she’s lost in the woods and scared for her life, she still finds the strength to be kind to the animals. In return they show her to the Dwarves’ cottage. She’s sweet and decides to clean up the place and take care of the dwarves out of the kindness of her heart and they return the kindness by giving her a home when she had none. At the end she’s rewarded with the true love’s kiss she wanted. We can even learn from the Evil Queen that vanity is a terrible thing. 

Originally posted by snowwhitecinderellaaurora-blog

Aurora:

The main thing to remember about Aurora is that for one thing, she met Phillip when she was a baby. The other thing is that while the good fairies did love her and take care of her, she grew up isolated and alone. She’s always had these dreams of meeting someone (anyone) else to break that isolation. But in that isolation she’s still strong, kind, and trusting. She loves her adoptive aunts, and for a side character(might make a post about that later) I would still count her as a good role model because of that kindness. 

Originally posted by goldensilverdisney

Cinderella:

Her, I’m definitely going to expand on in another post. But, she’s one of my favorite princess. Ironically, not one of my favorite movies, but she’s an amazing character and I love her. She’s a survivor of child abuse. That’s the very first thing that you need to understand about her. She doesn’t stay happy and content with a grin and bare it attitude, she got mad. She was snarky, and she only found happiness in the little free time she had and in her pets/friends. All she wanted that night was to go to the ball. All she wanted was one night to have fun and get out of the house. She wanted one night where she wouldn’t be berated and yelled at and ordered around. And when she met the prince, she didn’t even know who he was. She didn’t even mind that she would probably never see him again. And at the end she more or less saved herself. She didn’t wait around and sing a song from her tower to get rescued, she asked her friends to get the key and help her out. She was smart enough to pull out the other slipper. There’s nothing wrong with getting help from those around you and there’s no shame in asking for it. There’s nothing un-feminist about getting help, especially when you’re an abuse survivor. And that’s what Cinderella is about. Her fairy godmother coming to help her. Women helping women. 

Originally posted by disneymoviesanywhere

Ariel:

The one big thing that made the Disney renaissance so great is they decided to follow the rules of Broadway musicals. One of the trademarks of this is the “I want” song. That’s the motivation for the main character and it’s the driving force for the plot. 

Ariel wants to live in the human world. That’s her dream. She desperately wants to be a human. Eric was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. Ariel is strong willed and curious. She’s the undersea equivalent of an anthropologist. She’s 16, so of course she’s going to make stupid mistakes, but she gets to live out her dream in the end and become a human. The main point and what makes her a wonderful feminist role model is that she uses that drive and curiosity to pursue her passion. 

Originally posted by mkgaud

Belle:

I’m not sure I have to go into too much detail about her although I will mention, she is not a victim of Stockholm Syndrome. And to be honest how would being an abuse victim make her any less feminist? Anyway, of course she’s smart and loves reading. She loves adventure books and that’s what her “I want” song is about. She wants adventure and she wants someone who understands her and doesn’t think she’s weird for her interest. She’s a good role model not only for her love of reading but also of course for her kindness and seeing the good in people despite their appearance. 

Originally posted by moviewhorexo

Jasmine:

She. Is. Not. A. Prize. To. Be. Won. Moving on,

Kidding. But anyway she’s great because what she values is freedom and love. I feel like a lot of people forget is the line, “when I marry, I want it to be for love”. She wants to make her own choices in all aspects of her life and she decides to leave her life of privilege to pursue that freedom. You can hear and see it sprinkled in all around the movie (and the stage show). She sees herself as a bird in a cage and she’s happiest when she’s free and litteraly flying. And at the end she chooses Aladin. It’s all about her choice. 

Pocahontas:

Originally posted by anightmarefantasmic

So unintentional racism, stereotypes, white savior trope, erasing history, and pairing her with the horrible monster aside for a moment…

Let’s talk about 18 year old Disney Pocahontas as her own character. The main thing that comes to mind when I think of her is strength and bravery. She knows herself and she knows what she loves, and she’ll do anything to protect it. She also cares about the earth and environment. All of those are wonderful traits to have as a role model. 

Originally posted by magical-rasputin

Mulan:

Again, I don’t think I have to go into much detail about why she’s a great feminist role model. She’s usually who everyone thinks of when it comes to great feminist characters.

But what I will say is one thing not a lot of people mention in her great feminist role model-ness is that she doesn’t mind being feminine. She knows the ”perfect porcelain doll” isn’t her, but she doesn’t mind dressing up when she can make it her own. Another thing that I’m surprised get’s as ignored as it does especially since it’s scattered through the whole movie including her very first scene, she’s smart. She’s not a fighter, she’s a strategist. She makes her chores easier for herself. She wins the game of Go on her way to meet the match maker. She figures out how she can protect her dad. She uses the weights to her advantage. She does trigonometry in her head on the fly. She comes up with the distraction and using the fireworks. And the epitome of it all, she uses the symbol of femininity in the movie, her fan, to outsmart Shan Yu and take his sword. 

Originally posted by definite-disnerd

Tiana:

Can you believe I’ve heard people say Tiana isn’t feminist enough? Most people know how hardworking and practical she is, but she also learns a very important lesson that you’ll never be truly happy if you don’t let loose and have fun in reasonable amounts. She’s an amazing role model just as wonderful as everyone else in the line up and her morale is one of my favorites to try and live by. “Fairytales can come true, but you’ve gotta make them happen. It all depends on you.”


Rapunzel, Merida, Anna, Elsa, and Moana:

Honestly I feel like I don’t have to do much defending for these four. Everyone on this site has already pointed out what great feminist role models they are and many people regard them plus Tiana and Mulan as the “best” most feminist princesses. I love them all too, and of course they’re all great feminist role models, I just don’t think there’s much I could add. 

Anyway, I think a /lot/ of other Disney ladies are also wonderful feminist role models but this was supposed to be just the princess lineup. and I might make separate posts for them. But if you’ll notice I didn’t take relationship status, style choices, hobby choices, sexuality headcannons, or appearance into account when talking about what great role models they are because you shouldn’t. Of course women and girls deserve more than just one type of girl to look up to, but one type of girl isn’t any better or worse than another. You can be hyper feminine like Cinderella, Not feminine at all like Merida, or a little bit of both like Mulan. You can be smart like Belle, or naive yet kind like Snow White. All of them are wonderful. 

I’ll go ahead and leave you my favorite Disney feminist hero.

(she’s amazing. google her real quick)

KAZAKHSTAN 101 OR HOW TO OTABEK

THERE YOU GO YURI ON ICE FANDOM.

Disclaimer: this is in no way a fully comprehensive guide. This is just me trying to put together basics for people who are unfamiliar with Kazakhstan/Kazakhs to start their writing/research.

I am an ethnic Kazakh female, citizen of Kazakhstan, Almaty, bisexual, upper middle class, currently in college in the US. My experience is in no way representative of all kazakhs and Kazakhstan citizens. However, I think it’s pretty close to Otabek’s.

This is really, really long and kinda convoluted, but if you can bear it –– welcome!

Keep reading

When I was in my third year of college, a classmate who had attended a panel I was on tweeted for me to stop looking at her and that I was “no better at being a girl” than she was. While the statement was obviously a specific instance of transmisogyny against me, I couldn’t help but feel that this was something I wasn’t alone in. I reached out to several other trans women who, like me, had trouble making eye contact yet were scared of being perceived as staring. I know my brows are powerful and glare is intense, but I still have trouble merely looking directly into another person’s eyes. Trans women are perceived as inherently predatory and dangerous and cisgender women are socialized to fear our presence. Trans-exclusionary “feminists” likewise view us as possessing the male gaze, something that is unavoidable unless we are not looking at all. Many trans people did not grow up having normal relationships with others and may be awkward with eye contact. Perceiving the moments when trans women look at people as us having bad intentions is never okay. In fact, it is usually cisgender straight people who stare at us who have the bad intentions instead. By getting to know trans people instead of making judgments like these, you can help end the stigma of our very ability to interact with others.

anonymous asked:

could you rec some wlw ya books? thanksss

this keeps getting longer!! but I’ve read all of these, so ask me if you have any questions about them! If you’re looking for more masterposts, try @wlwbooksource

Genre Fic w Major WLW Couples

  • The Abyss Surrounds Us Duology by Emily Skrutskie: lesbian pirate x lesbian sea monster trainer in the future. Literally. One of my proudest achievements is giving this book hype. The author draws fanart of Swift and Cas kissing and posts it to her tumblr (again, not kidding, there’s some on my blog). Main character is asian. otp: equal footing
  • Jane Unlimited by Kristin Cashore!!! oh my god I love this book. it’s got a bi girl as the protagonist and it’s super atmospheric and interesting and references all these classics but is also modern and her romance plot is genuinely Iconic
  • Into the Drowning Deep by Mira Grant: an ICONIC novel about killer mermaids and a sarcastic bi scientist who falls for an autistic PR girl. also it’s fucking terrifying bye
  • The Scorpion Rules Duology by Erin Bow: literally one of my fave books of all time, amazingly complex villain, super strong bi girl protag and her adorable bi gf, you will be genuinely confused which side is good and which side is bad, the three main characters are So Good, tw for an unhappy ending to this one but it’s… not any of the tropes. also a semi-hopeful end in the sequel which was?? good??
  • The Long Way To A Small Angry Planet by Becky Chambers: This book is such hopeful and interesting and character-driven scifi. 
  • In Ageless Sleep by Arden Ellis: if you want a sci-fi novella with some hella good romance. especially for being approximately 50 pages. 
  • Down Among the Sticks and Bones by Seanan McGuire!! if you want a wlw novella that talks about gender roles and is the sequel to A FUCKING HUGO AWARD WINNER. this series is super diverse in so many ways. 
  • That Inevitable Victorian Thing by E.K. Johnston: wow can’t believe E.K. Johnston invented writing stories driven by women?? it’s about polyamory in a scifi futuristic victorian Canada. and yes, it is exactly as amazing as it sounds. 
  • Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardhoust: character driven wlw snow white retelling!!! 
  • The Accident Season and Spellbook of the Lost & Found by Moira Fowley-Doyle: two weird vaguely magical realist books about Lesbians. Spellbook is the gayer one - it’s double pov and one lead is a bi girl who falls for a guy and one lead is a lesbian who falls for another bi girl and it’s!! pure!!
  • Dreadnought Duology by April Daniels: okay it’s about a trans girl who becomes a superhero and dates another superhero girl and yes it IS amazing. 
  • Otherbound: f/f romance with a bi girl as main character. There’s literally not a single white character. It’s about body swapping and fantasy! talks frankly about the issues in the main relationship, suspenseful. Sense8 in a way.  
  • Ash and Huntress by Malinda Lo: occur in the same world, although you don’t have to read both. Ash is lesbian cinderella. Huntress focuses more on character development and is my personal favorite, but tw for a bittersweet ending. Malinda Lo also wrote the Adaptation series, featuring a bisexual protag and her alien gf, but that one wasn’t my favorite. I know a lot of people who love it though!
  • The Dark Wife by Sara Diemer: girl Persephone / Hades. My gay classics student ass unabashedly loved this. I think you can get it free on the author'a blog? Attempted rape tw (not between the main couple, their relationship was entirely consensual)
  • Monstress by Marjorie M. Liu and Sana Takeda: Another Hugo Award winner but this time a graphic novel!! it’s complicated but it’s super worth it and all the mcs are morally ambiguous woc

Contemporary w Major WLW Couples

  • A & B by J.C. Lillis!! y'all have GOT to read this. it’s seriously the most delightful enemies-to-lovers filled-with-banter novel and maybe my fav romance book ever?? it’s fucking HILARIOUS.
  • Love Letters To The Dead: the wlw “side-romance” is honestly given just as much screentime as (if not more than) the main romance. literally one of my all-time favorite romances in anything ever, I read this book in my questioning phase and it changed my life
  • This Is Where It Ends: lesbians at a school shooting, primarily non-white characters, you will cry (spoilers: they both live and stay together)
  • Lies We Tell Ourselves by Robin Talley: 1960s civil rights era lesbians, ends happily. It emphasizes all of the problematic tropes often used in “overcoming racism” stories and why they’re not okay. This was recced to me by a black person so I trust that assessment. I also really love her other books, which have a lot of wlw as well. 
  • Lies My Girlfriend Told Me: Basically: Girl #1 finds out her dead girlfriend was cheating on her with Girl #2. Girl #1 and Girl #2 fall in love. This book is so adorable. The author has several thousand other wlw books so knock yourselves out. 
  • Tell Me Again How A Crush Should Feel by Sara Farizan: a cheesefest with racial diversity. I love this book so much (it’s so good and PURE) even though it’s not hugely deep. 
  • You Know Me Well by David Levithan + Nina Lacour: The authors alone should be enough to make you want to read this. I still am lowkey bitter the two boys didn’t end up together, but they stay friends and all so it’s fine. Found family!
  • Afterworlds by Scott Westerfeld: Storyline between two girl authors in New York, ends happily!! also the protagonist was confirmed acearo spec on Twitter which is pretty obvious if you read the book. I’ve heard his other series Zeroes has lesbians too
  • Everything Leads To You by Nina Lacour: moviemaker wlw! cheesy as all hell, but adorable and really deep. very much recommended if you’re into moviemaking or acting
  • Queens of Geek by Jen Wilde: I think everyone has read this already but it’s Pure and about fandom
  • Get It Together Delilah / the Flywheel by Erin Gough: read this if you want cute cheesy girls falling in love at a coffee shop!!
  • for some of my fav shorts!! the story How from Roxane Gay’s Difficult Women is one of my fav wlw short stories ever. Also try out Alyssa Wong’s Hungry Daughters of Starving Mothers, it’s free from tor and really fucking great!! and Nic Stone’s Happy Beginning from the Welcome Home anthology is a beautiful cinnamon roll of a story that I’ll never get over and I’d die for her

Some That Aren’t Love Stories Quite As Much: 

  • Far From You by Tess Sharpe: crime thriller with bi / recovering drug addict main character and major f/f romance. Not a happy ending for the couple bc the romance is in the past, but happy ending for the protagonist. This is one of my all time fave books not even lying
  • Exit Pursued By A Bear by EK Johnston: About the main character’s rape and her subsequent abortion. Main character does not have a romance plot, but her best friend (the second most important character) is a lesbian and falls in love with another friend. This one doesn’t belong quite as much, but it’s one of my all time favorite books ever and it’s all about female friendship / love and it’s?? pure?? (ALSO READ HER OTHER BOOK A THOUSAND NIGHTS ID DIE FOR EK JOHNSTON)
  • Cherry: About female friendships and relationships with sex, really feminist. There are four girls, one realizes she’s gay, and her friends are just so pure and supportive about it???? there’s a bit of romance but I still feel like it’s more about the friendships between the girls. 
  • Beauty Queens by Libba Bray: f/f romance, one lesbian one bi girl and one trans girl. Hilarious social commentary, very feminist, lots of woc. Libba Bray also has another hist fiction series that I’ve heard is gay (the first book is called A Great And Terrible Beauty) but I don’t know much about it. 
  • Kissing The Witch: Sometimes-gay versions of fairytales, really really interesting and pure and GREAT. 
  • Tricks and sequel Traffick by Ellen Hopkins: about kids forced into prositution, so all the tws. among main characters, there’s a gay guy and a bi girl!  Ignore the back that says “four straight one gay” because it’s a lie and publishers need to shut up. The bi girl is just?? such an amazing character and I love her with all my heart. 
  • If You Could Be Mine by Sara Farizan: realistic fiction about what wlw in Iran have to go through. tw for a not-great end for the couple, but there’s no death and the main character is happy. It’s more about the self-acceptance of the main character than about the romance. 
  • Ask The Passengers by A.S. King: magical realism kind of? more about coming out than about romance. Happy ending. 
  • The Miseducation Of Cameron Post by Emily Danforth: again, more about coming out, but wow this book is amazing. Happy ending for the girl, not for the couple. 

Fucked-Up Female Friendships Aesthetic

  • Suicide Notes From Beautiful Girls by: This book is so freaky and messed up and I’m still not exactly sure how it ended, but it still blew me away. The Mr and Mrs Smith wlw au you never knew you wanted, although I’m not going to spoil how. Fucked up ending but still happyish? 
  • Dare Me by Megan Abbot: This book is creepy as fuck and revolves around the relationship between two girls which is… really gay, like canonically gay. I liked this a lot, but be warned that it’s not a romance. Happy ending mostly?
  • Dangerous Girls by Abigail Haas: This one had a lot of wasted potential in the form of a well-built story about the craziness of rich kids partying, but it is a very good murder mystery focused around two girls. 

You know those cutesy embroidery-looking graphics with, like, a butterfly saying “Be a bitch” or “Never Apologize” in cursive letters? (and the butterflies and flowers with faces and pastel colors are supposed to show that these are messages for women, only somehow that isn’t sexist)? They show up a lot on certain pop feminist blogs and they’ve always bugged me.

Anyway, I kind of want to do a series of opposite graphics. Like, a really metal looking t-rex saying in spiky, blood-dripping letters “Be polite to all you interact with” or a flaming shark saying “err on the side of apologizing if you think you may have hurt someone.” Fuck the “cutesy aggression” aesthetic. I want snarling, badass, compassionate etiquette.

so lots of people have been asking me my thoughts on laci green’s “red pill” stuff recently. some, in an accusatory way (”why aren’t you a good feminist like laci green?”) and some in a confused way (”help im not sure how to process this”).

i’ve largely avoided commenting on it publicly for personal reasons. i dont like talking about individuals instead of ideas anyway, but there was just some stuff going on for me irl that made me not want to comment on this specifically.

but, at this point, i think laci is doing enough harm that it’s worth publicly saying that i really don’t like what she’s doing or how she’s doing it. i could go into a whole like in-depth thing examining every single point in her two “red pill” videos and analyzing her tweets because there’s a lot to unpack, but honestly that’s not worth my time because it won’t convince anyone of anything. people who want to support her are going to support her, and vice versa for those who don’t. i’ve had my arguments about it already and it’s tired and boring.

as an overarching critique, though, all i will say is that she doesn’t need to 1) throw other feminists under the bus or 2) befriend people who engage in online harassment.

you might not think she’s throwing anyone under the bus, and you might not think the people she’s befriending engage in online harassment – but again, i’m not trying to convince anyone of that. that’s just how i see it.

myself and other feminist creators have gotten a lot of backlash for not being ~open to a dialogue~ like laci, and i don’t think she has done anything to defend us. i think she’s tweeted a couple times that “not every feminist has to debate like me” but then the rest of her rhetoric is full of “i hate how so many feminists refuse to engage in dialogue but don’t worry everyone i’m a good feminist”. and not only does that throw us under the bus but it makes the wildly inaccurate assumption that none of us have ever engaged with any competing ideas which is a beloved anti-feminist talking point but patently false. many of us engage with these ideas, just not in the form of livestreamed debates. we’ve had our arguments, we’ve spent hours arguing over the same points, we’ve wasted our time trying to convince people of things they refuse to accept.

it’s just that she seems more interested in pandering to anti-feminists, complimenting them, and making them feel good than she does protecting the people who are at the receiving end of anti-feminist harassment campaigns.

and when people have said extremely horrible horrible things about me and my friends and tried to make our lives hell for months (or years), it hurts to see a large feminist youtuber like laci defending them and leaving me and other feminist youtubers out to dry.

i personally do not think engaging with anti-feminist ideas is a bad thing. contrary to popular belief, i talk to people with opposing viewpoints all the time (but riley you block people on twitter! yeah, conversations happen off twitter, fucking shocking i know right). but at some point, i’m just repeating myself. the arguments have been had. the points have been made. and i don’t have the money, the time, or the energy to devote 8 hours a day to arguing with anti-feminists. if someone else wants to do that, i think there’s a way to go about it that does not involve befriending anti-feminists or elevating small anti-feminists channels to a larger platform. engaging with the ~other side~ is not inherently bad – discussion and dialogue can be useful – but you have to be careful of the way in which you do it. one aspect of that is the difference between discussing privately and debating publicly. public debates are a spectacle, a show. they’re not conducive to learning or growing or conceding points. they’re conducive to proving you’re right and they’re wrong at all costs and being able to say you “owned” them the next day.

i think laci is approaching this in entirely the wrong way, and it seems to me that she has either fallen for a lot of bullshit anti-feminist talking points or is pretending to in an effort to get closer to them. either way, i think it’s kinda messed up.

anyway, that’s all imma say on the topic. the more we all talk about laci and hype up the little drama she has created, the more she profits from it and is incentivized to continue doing it. im done caring about this show she’s putting on, and i’ll continue doing the intersectional work she has abandoned.

it is absolutely, hilariously astonishing to me how often i’m asked to provide a 25 page extensively sourced MLA formatted academic style paper about why i think pansy parkinson is a character worth discussing, but…here we are, i guess.

first thing’s first—

fanon pansy =/= canon pansy.

canon pansy =/= fanon pansy.

canon pansy is a one-dimensional bully with no discernible personality traits beyond “mean” and “myopic”. she’s villainized by the story. her primary function within the narrative is to follow draco malfoy around. she’s background noise. she giggles, and she shrieks, and she makes fun of harry & co. pansy parkinson is also a figurative dumping ground for an alarming number of awful, misogynistic, enormously unflattering stereotypes for female characters—her relationship with draco is depicted as at least partially one-sided, which makes her seem desperate; she has a tendency to mock other students for their physical appearances, which makes her seem insecure; and she’s likened, more than once, to a literal dog. literally. a dog.  

(rowling had a truly terrible habit of peppering the hp books with a lot of these villainous non-characters, who were almost always slytherins, and who were almost always described as either unattractive, unintelligent, or both. see: millicent bulstrode, who is jokingly suspected of being related to a troll. marcus flint, who cheats at quidditch, is held back multiple school years, and has appallingly bad teeth. crabbe & goyle, who are violent, overweight, and implied to need draco’s help with her homework in order to avoid flunking out.)

canon pansy is a poorly constructed caricature of a Mean Girl who readers are meant to find abhorrent. all the ingredients for a spectacularly unlikeable character are there. it’s like rowling had a checklist.

that said, pansy’s role as hermione’s social foil gives her slightly more of a personality than the majority of the other slytherins. pansy is shown to be friendly with blaise zabini, who is, canonically, arrogant and enigmatic and disdainful of draco malfoy. pansy wears a pink dress to the yule ball. she likes unicorns. she possesses leadership qualities—she’s a prefect, she has a “gang” of slytherin girls—and is, by virtue of that, at the very least an above average student. she’s loyal to the people she’s shown to be close to. she cries when draco is hurt. her political affiliations, parentage, and blood status are categorically unknown. we can assume she’s probably a pureblood, and that she chose not to fight against the death eater regime at hogwarts, but she wasn’t a death eater. her dialogue with draco and blaise zabini about the war in HPB was ambiguously supportive, at worst.

(important note—one of the major themes in the books is redemption. see: severus snape. regulus black. the malfoys. rowling’s world building was full of lofty, often convoluted metaphors for racism and homophobia, which had the unfortunate side-effect of humanizing a lot of actively, violently racist characters who would have otherwise been unpalatable to any reasonably self-aware reader. the notion that grand gestures of bravery and self-sacrifice are necessary for redemption—again, see: severus snape, regulus black, the malfoys—is, however, repulsive to me, especially when the argument of worthiness is centered on a teenage girl who has, canonically, spent her formative years hanging around actively, violently racist people. And that’s not even delving into the numerous instances of benign racism perpetrated by characters who aren’t vile slytherin blood supremacists. see: the weasleys. albus dumbledore. rufus scrimgeour. the text goes out of its way to emphasize that combating internalized prejudices is an ongoing battle that has to be consciously fought. it’s a choice. but i digress.)

canon pansy =/= fanon pansy.

fanon pansy =/= canon pansy.

i see a lot of discourse about pansy being an inappropriate “feminist icon"—she’s a bully, she’s mean to other girls, et cetera, et cetera—and the irony of passing that kind of judgment on a female character whose entire narrative existence is predicated on her ability to compare unfavorably to, you know, all the good female characters; it is staggering.

so.

look.

i have loved characters like hermione granger and ginny weasley and fleur delacour since i was a child. they are smart and brave and interesting and Not Like Other Girls. their flaws are considered socially acceptable. hermione is bossy and narrow-minded; but she’s also usually right. ginny is outspoken and reactionary and obstinate; but she’s also pretty and popular and good at sportball. fleur is vain and self-absorbed; but she’s also beautiful and brilliant and fiercely loyal.  

Not. Like. Other. Girls.

not like pansy parkinson, for example, who is, almost unapologetically, exactly the kind of girl no one ever wants to be.  

she likes pink. she giggles. she cries. she chases after a boy who, at best, seems mostly indifferent to her presence. she’s self-conscious enough about her nose that it’s a well-known sore spot for other students to maliciously poke at. i don’t think we ever get a description of what her voice sounds like, but i instinctively associate her with a high-pitched, nasally whine. she’s petty—see: her interview with rita skeeter in GoF—and she’s narcissistic—see: her stint with the inquisitorial squad—and she’s a cliché, of course, just not an especially creative one.

there are obvious, valid criticisms to be made about how people interact with characters like pansy parkinson. and draco malfoy. and severus snape. but there is a huge difference between blindly excusing or romanticizing those characters’ actions and making an effort to humanize them.  

tl;dr

bad people are not bad characters.

no shade but i think most of you like black feminism only in theory. you want to appear to support the ideologies and such of black women’s feminism because you don’t want to appear racist. i don’t think many of you really know what black feminism is. it’s not second or third wave american feminism in blackface. black feminists were reviled and ostracized from major feminist organizing not only because they were black, but because of the content of their politics as well. if you all really knew what black feminism was, i really think most of you would hate it lol.

8

get to know me meme ★ 2/10 current celebrities crushes ❥ margot robbie

Certainly there’s a huge appeal to the ‘60s, because it was such a big turning point to everyone. It was the era of change, the boiling point. People rebelled against things - the hippies, the feminists, the protesters. All these things just built up and boiled over. I think people can relate to that today.

Just because Taylor Swift is Taylor Swift does not mean she is any less human. I know y'all think celebrities aren’t like us so we can talk shit about them behind our screens, but PEOPLE. This. Woman. Was. Sexually. Assaulted.

Where are all the feminists fighting for women’s rights and equality. Where are your voices now???? Just because she’s Taylor Swift doesn’t mean she doesn’t need support like all the other women or men in the world.

She’s not even doing this for herself but in efforts to prevent anything similar from ever happening to others.

The man who assaulted her is being sued for $1. I repeat. One single dollar. She isn’t doing this for money. She’s doing it for you. So don’t joke about this situation like it’s nothing. Please.

npr.org
Why Do Men Harass Women? New Study Sheds Light On Motivations
Researchers interviewed 4,830 men in the Middle East and came to some surprising conclusions.

Esraa Yousria Saleh was walking down El Hussein, a busy street in downtown Cairo famous for its souvenirs and tchotchkes, when a man in his early 20s made eye contact with her. He followed her, circled her, then suddenly — she felt a hot breath in her ear:

“I would like to put it all inside.”

Saleh, 28, a feminist and activist based in Egypt, was furious. Why did that man feel like he could look at her? Follow her? Say those lewd words to her?

A May study from Promundo, an international research group, and U.N. Women sheds fresh light on men’s motivations for harassing women on the streets in four areas in the Middle East: Egypt, Lebanon, Morocco and the Palestinian territories.

“We know quite a lot about women and girls but nothing about men and boys” when it comes to harassment, says Shereen El Feki, co-author of the report and the author of Sex and the Citadel: Intimate Life in a Changing Arab World.

Dear Liberal Feminists: The Hijab is Not Empowering

I am in Baghdad right now and I have my back to the wall as I type. I am slowly moving my laptop closer to my chest and looking around to make sure nobody else sees what I am writing. I am Iraqi. I am a woman. I am Christian. And I am not a hijabi.

Iraq, much like Iran, used to be a more secular place. The Saddam regime was brutal, but he kept Islamism in the country under control until the end when he sensed his loss of power and began turning to Islam. That is what regimes here usually do.

Liberal feminists will tell you the hijab was a response to the West. It is a defiant act against imperialism! It’s not. I am here and I promise you, the hijab is not empowering.

First, not all Iraqis are Muslim. If Islam is what unites us against imperialism, then where does that leave me? Subjugated. As a Christian and as a woman.

Second, and more importantly, women cannot reclaim our bodies by falling beneath another form of hegemony. “We do not want to submit to the Western men, and therefore we submit to the Arab men” is hardly a step forward.

Let me clarify: I do not want the Western armies in Iraq. They rape, torture, and kill Iraqi women and attempt to steal our limited resources for themselves. I do not, however, think abuse by Arab men is somehow a step in the right direction.

When Saddam fell, Iraqi men quickly searched for power. Those who did not find it are doing what emasculated men always do. They are practicing power over the women in their families.

I find it disgusting but expected that women’s clothing is always inspected. Whatever we wear, it is always the wrong thing for some people. I am not here to tell women what to wear. I am trying to dissect the idea that the hijab is empowering especially here in the Middle East.

In Iraq and in every other Middle Eastern country where the hijab is not required by law, (it is required in Iran and more extremely in Saudi Arabia), there are two specific demographics I have noticed wearing it:
1. Poor, uneducated women
2. The family members of Islamic leaders

I will focus on the first of these before moving on to the second. It is my experience that in almost every country in the world, poor and uneducated people are the most performative in their religion. When I lived in Spain, this was the case. The poor old women who walked along the beach were more devoted to their Christianity than I, a Christian from a place where my family was persecuted for it, ever was.

But both my parents are professors in biology and studied when Baghdad was the best place in the Middle East to study. None of my friends here, who are mostly Muslim, cover their hair. They come from educated families. They do not need to lean on religion.

For poor women, this is different. They are not likely to receive an education and understand from a young age they will need to depend on a husband or be a burden to the family. They often do not have jobs so if there is abuse in the household they are trapped. They have to follow the rules of men to survive, more than I do.

If these woman do not cover from a young age, they will not find a good husband. Men are close-minded and possessive and they cannot deal with a possibility other men saw such “intimate” parts of THEIR wife.

Their families pressure them to follow these rules. An uncovered woman will bring shame to the family first by revealing herself and then by not finding a good husband to provide for her. They are pressured to cover as young as eight and nine years old. Can any person that young devote themselves to an outfit for life?

Street harassment is very common in Baghdad. The few times I have been harassed when outside with hijabi women, they have blamed me for not covering. “I am Christian” I will say. “The men know that” is usually their response. The culture is so toxic that women with the hijab believe they are superior to those without it.

But materially they are inferior and they know that. In almost every case, women who do not cover are wealthier, more educated, better-employed, less-dependent on men, and live materially better lives. So what do poor, uneducated women have? Religion. I really can’t blame them.

Religion is also used as a tool by the second group I mentioned, the Islamic leaders, to unite and control the masses. Sure, your family is starving and your babies are dying from preventable diseases. But what do I offer you? Eternal life in heaven as long as you do everything I tell you in the name of God.

This makes people feel included and gives them purpose. It also creates a hierarchy in society. When men are permitted and even encouraged to oppress the women in their lives, they are more likely to follow the leaders that allow this. It makes them feel powerful. Men, especially poor men, want to feel power over something or someone.

In this way, the hijab is empowering… but only for men. It strips power away from women. It represents a society moving backwards in many ways.

Many women will tell you they choose to wear the hijab or they wear it for Allah. Once you ask questions, you will find this is less true. In almost all cases, they began wearing it at a young age (and always under eighteen) and were pressured by family.

I am hypocritical because I too perform “feminine” things because of family or society pressure. I wear my hair long even though it bothers me and I wish I could shave it off because I do not want to face society’s judgment for doing that. But at least I realize the source of this contradiction.

Western liberal feminists who praise the hijab are forgetting about the rest of us. I am terrified of a day I live in a place where covering is the law. Iraq is my home and I don’t want to leave, but sometimes I think maybe I don’t belong here especially if something like my hair can get me killed.

In every country, we need to have a larger conversation about what women say we want and what we really want. We also need to realize the broken logic of “wanting” to do something because it pleases men.

Liberal feminists: I know it is scary for you to criticize the hijab because then you have to admit some of your personal choices are actually part of your effort to serve the patriarchy. We all need to face this fact because if we don’t, we cannot get any closer to liberating ourselves.