i know im not funny but pls

  • Taehyung: I like your new pants.
  • Jimin: Thanks! They were 50% off actually.
  • Taehyung: I'd like them better if they were 100% off.
  • Jimin: The store can't just give away clothes for free.
  • Taehyung: That's not what I meant...
  • Jimin: That's a terrible way to run a business, Tae.
Color my inbox!

BLACK = I would date you.
GREEN = I think you’re cute.
BLUE = You are my tumblr crush.
GREY = I wish you would notice me.
PURPLE = I don’t talk to you but I really love your blog.
TEAL = We have a lot in common.
YELLOW = I don’t know you at all.
ORANGE = I don’t like your blog.
BROWN = I don’t like you.
PINK = I think you are unattractive.
RED = I hate you with a burning passion.
WHITE = You scare me.
RAINBOW = BED PLZ.
SCARLET = You have influenced my decision/thoughts on something.
MAROON = You taught me something new.
CINNAMON = You’re a really cool person and admire you from afar.

PERIWINKLE = You make me laugh
MAUVE = You are really talented
BLUSH = Seeing you on my dash makes my day a little better.
CYAN = We have very little in common
THISTLE = I only just started following you
INDIGO = I’ve been following you for a long time
FUCHSIA = Your blog content is gold
COPPER = Your blog content is trash (and I love it)
VERMILION = You make me feel passionate
HONEYDEW = I want to call you by a nickname
LAVENDER = You inspire me
CORAL = You’re a meme
UMBER = I want to know more about you


FORGET-ME-NOT = You remind me of somebody
RAZZMATAZZ = I would share my favorite food with you
ARSENIC = I don’t know how to describe the way I feel about you
WINE = You make me feel kinda funny, like when we used to climb the rope in gym class
SAFFRON = I love your ideas
TIMBERWOLF = I trust you
FALLOW = I want to run through the Northern wilderness barefoot with you
PLUM = I’d like to chat with you
TANGERINE = I love your aesthetic
SAGE = You make me cry
CRIMSON = We should collaborate on something!
VIRIDIAN = I wanna hang out on your blog
CHARTREUSE = You’re my homie
BURGUNDY = I get excited when I see posts from you

based on that one comic that i can’t find
(pls link it if u can find it/know of if :) )

edit: here’s the link http://sabertoothwalrus.tumblr.com/post/152655628757/i-can-only-be-funny-if-i-take-jokes-from-other
  • ot*yuri shippers: reaching a certain age doesn't instantly make you an actual adult!! otabek just turned 18 and it didn't automatically make him mature a ton
  • also ot*yuri shippers: lol yuri's 16 aka he's an adult in his country so it's legal :)
following ppl who reblog:
  • funny dank memes yo
  • aesthetic pretty things
  • pusheen
  • achievement hunter
  • scenery
  • fashion 
  • tv shows: greys anatomy/ shameless/ its always sunny/ TWD/ OITNB/ Black Mirror/ Sense 8/ Unbreakable/ bobs burgers/ AHS/ Grace and Frankie/ The Office
  • music: 21 p/ Paramore/ angels and airwaves/ green day/ 
    • side note: I need to get into some more bands as you can tell so if some of yall wanna recommend me to some bands/songs that would rock (maybe even make an impression wink wink)

pls reblog or like this post so I know who to follow thx love ya

*thanks so much guys for so many responses! Im getting thru the list of the blogs that meet my likes so be patient!*

~~another edit, please make sure that your blog has one or more of the above! I will only follow if I like what I see and if you actually like or reblog this post!~~

skype part i [h2ovanoss]

“Are you sure you can handle yourself, Jonathan?”

“For the third time, Mother, Yes. I can handle myself. I’m grounded anyways.” Jonathan mumbled the last part, hoping that his mother didn’t hear it. But as always, mothers find out.

“You are grounded. If I hear any funny business from anyone or anything suspicious when your father and I get home, we will move back to North Carolina. Got that?” Jonathan’s mother said sternly, as Jonathan rolled his eyes and nodded sarcastically if that made sense. “Maybe do some homework while you’re at it, son. Haven’t seen you do that in a long time.” Jonathan’s father said it with not much emotion, which left Jonathan confused, not knowing if he was joking or being serious. “I would do my homework, but you know,” Jonathan started, “you banned me from school for two weeks.” Jonathan did actually have homework to finish from those previous weeks, but it’s not like he was going to do that homework anyways. So, he didn’t let that thought occupy his mind. He had much better plans.

“Loosen up, guys. Go to Hawaii without your son. I don’t have anything to contact my friends or anything. You took those away from me too.” Jonathan sassed back. With his phone, PC, every game console he owned, taken away from him; he had plenty of time to waste for thinking about sassy comebacks and quips for, not only his friends, but his parents. Ever since Jonathan confessed to him that he was a flaming bisexual, they haven’t been a very happy and bubbly family like they were before.

“Just do as much shit as you can that doesn’t involve being a faggot, Jonatha-”

“Jon. It’s Jon.” Jonathan growled, his eyes growing a darker shade of blue, making Jonathan’s mother step a bit backwards. And of course, his father not giving any flying fucks.

“Whatever, let’s go, Elizabeth.” my what-so-called father dragged my mother to the car, carrying their luggage with them. I heard the car engine start and tires screeching abruptly on the drive-way. The roaring of their car engine fade away.

I looked out the window and saw mo sight or trail of them. I smirked and immediately ran to my parents’ room and opened their walk-in closet.

“Bottom of the third pile, second row, fifth column.” I whispered to myself, counting each column and pile and row there was until I found it. My laptop.

I laughed, “God, they’re so fucking stupid when it comes to hiding things. Like their failed marriage.” I said, looking at the ‘hidden’ divorce papers under other piles of junk mail.

I went to my room and literally jumped onto the bed and locked my door. I closed my window and locked them so my neighbor doesn’t get suspicious.

I opened the laptop and turned it on, “I’m almost there.” I murmured, putting my password into the blank space.

Once it went to desktop, I didn’t care about my social media, the amount of memes I’ve missed in the past four months, the amount of notifications I have from that one party. I had my priorities.

I double-clicked the logo, clicking his name, then clicking call.

“Jon?”

“Evan! Evan, hi! Oh my god, how long has it been?” I yelled out, but not too loud for my neighbor to hear.

“Dude, you’ve missed so much. The guys have missed you so much. Especially me, baby.” Evan winked, joking the last part. “What did I miss?” I asked excitedly and clapping my hands together, The amount of things I wanted to hear from his angelic voice was making me nervous and— “Everything basically. You probably missed the news that drugs were found it some kid’s locker and they had school lock down for a few days…” Evan went on and on, missing the feeling of comfort and nostalgia, even if its only been two weeks.

Jonathan checked the time, his parents were so suspicious of him that they had his neighbor check on him on 00:30. It was already 23:30. One more hour His mind went back to his best friend, “Tyler and Craig got into a huge fight and one thing lead to another, Daithi tried to stop Tyler, but we all know how that would’ve ended up.”

Jonathan was shocked, “Holy shit, is Daithi okay? Let me guess, black eye and a busted lip?” Evan smirked, “Tyler’s iconic.”

“So, did Craig and Tyler make up?”

Evan chuckled, “Tyler came into school the next day after lunch with a cocky smirk and messed up hair, along with Craig who looked dazed as fuck and limping quite a bit.” Jonathan chuckled as well, “Ah. Make-up sex. In the bathroom too, I salute the two.” Jonathan shook his head, smiling a little bit.

Evan kept talking and talking and talking and fuck, Jonathan couldn;t will away the fact that it was starting to get a little hot. Jonathan was sweating. He couldn’t will away the fact that he was turned on; aroused; horny. He always knew he had some sort of tiny infatuation for the asian, but he never really paid attention to it or Jonathan himself pushed it away. Before Jonathan could even realize, he was already palming himself through his basketball shorts. “It just sucks without you, Jonathan,” Evan sighed.

Not soon after, Evan was still telling stories from how Tyler literally almost fucked Craig during a party to how Brian gave Brock the most deep purple hickey he’s ever seen. “Like, how could someone bite that hard? . . There were teeth marks!” Evan said, running his hand through his own hair. Jonathan always thought when Evan did that with his hair was fucking hot.

Jonathan already slipped his hand into his briefs and started to touch himself, ragged breaths already starting to emit from his throat, trying to hide from Evan the fact that he was jerking off to him. Sure, Jonathan had had lewd dreams about the canasian, but he never thought he’d have enough balls to touch himself while skyping him.

Evan was walking around his own room, looking for something around his room. Jonathan didn’t know what he was looking before because he wasn’t paying attention, for obvious reasons. “Aha!” Evan found whatever he was looking for, and bent down to grab it, and Jonathan could see his best friend’s plump round ass clearly. Jonathan sucked in a breathe. Hoping Evan wouldn’t hear him. What is the circumference of his ass? It’s like, perfectly round. Jonathan thought to himself.

Unfortunately for Jonathan, Evan did hear him and looked back at his camera, walking back with his head cocked to the side. “What’s wrong, bud?” Evan said, and because he was sick—as he said earlier, when Jonathan was actually paying attention— Evan had a husky and sexy voice, like as if he had just woken up.

That alone set Jonathan over the edge, biting his lip to stop the moan from emitting from his mouth. At this point, Jonathan was already jerking himself off. “Jon, why is your camera moving up and do– oh my god.”

Fuck.

Jonathan was having a tsunami of mixed emotions going on in his mind. Lust and embarrassment being the strongest.

“Jon, are you… jerking off?”

random ik but...

okay so,,, i was just thinking,,, i love my mutuals so much… so why not let them know randomly in an act of an appreciation post ?? im sorry this is so spontaneous i just feel like shouting out to all my best internet buddies so everyone else can check them out bc theyre literally ALL THE BEST. just saying. FOLLOW THEM NOW !!! (pls you wont regret it i promise) in no order:

@smol-anime-phan133 : ty for being with me through life, you’re literally my therapist and i need you to know that any time you need it, i’ll be there for you bc you’ve always been there for me (even during my 12 yo random phase im v sorry) and I appreciate you💕

@malecfangirl101 man we go wayyyyyy back, but i still appreciate you so much, you’re actually one of the most fabulous people i know. it’s a shame we don’t see each other irl as much but im so glad we text bc seriously it’s great to be able to be so open and yet random and weird to someone as accepting as you ✨

@nutellalester don’t even get me started you are such a bean, daniel !! you contribute some of the best bants to the gc and all the amazing creations (art/writing) you make is literally so good,,,also youve got literally the best music taste ty for existing 💛

@huphilpuffs okay so not only are you literally one of the sweetest people, but you make the prettiest gifs ??? how is this fair at all ??you’ve got so much talent and overall just loveliness and support im super happy to know you ty for everything ☺️

@misshktt oml where do i begin?? youre funny, supportive, open and generally just a really great person to be around !! you literally are toriel it’s not even funny the resemblance is uncanny,,, except less goat and more pure bean ty 💙

@actualhatter there’s so much to say about how great you are i literally could ramble on forever but for everyone’s sake i’ll try to be short: you’re funny, kind, really good at drawing AND you share my addiction to tøp and josh dun in general?? how could a person literally get any cooler?? ty for everything fren 😊

@phantastically-over-life phil lester defence squad unite haha thanks for listening and even agreeing with me when i ramble endlessly about my love and appreciation for phil, you’re really great and friendly, i love talking to you tysm fren💗

@philmeup-dildo i have a feeling this might be the longest paragraph purely bc you are literally one of the best people i know,,, you listen to everything i have to say (im sorry i ramble and complain a lot lol) and overall are just so supportive and kind, as well as we share heaps of interests (okay our music not so much bUT STILL) !! ty for being so open and letting me vent and bant with you bc seriously you have made me laugh when i really needed it so ty for everything 🤗 (also my mum loves you more than me im pretty sure)

@totallynotlevi // @totallynotfics you were one of my first internet friends, Levi, and although some of our interest have changed im so glad we still talk regularly bc you’re literally such a great person and im so happy I’ve found someone who loves pj and tøp as much as me 💚

@you-could-say-im-relocating-it you are the purest and funniest bean to ever exist, our gc owes you for making us laugh all the time with your supportive, funny and relatable personality !! if you ever need anything pls feel free to talk bc id love to get to know you better 😁

@little-cheeky-monkey you deserve the world, honestly im so glad we are mutuals, you’re pretty (even if you don’t realise it yet,, believe me), funny, supportive, really kind and just generally share my love of dogs and hp !!! (pls pet your dogs for me btw so pure) ty for everything and just being yourself you matter a lot ❤️

@heck-yeah-fandoms funny! great! supportive! those are only some of the many words i could use to describe you, ty so much for being a great fren i appreciate talking to you, you make me smile 😋

@pepperminthowell have you ever met someone that’s just so great and the thought of them being in your life fills you with joy??? you’re that person to me and basically the whole gc,,, seriously thank you for everything it means so much you are way too lovely and good for this world 💜

@isle-of-the-glowing-eyes although we talk on my other side blog, i just wanted to add you here bc you are really relatable, kind and im glad i feel i can be open around you bc you’ve just got such a great personality !! not to mention we also have a huge addiction with tøp oml ty for listening to me ramble haha 🌸

@dan-phil-obsessed we’ve been talking for quite a while now, and i can confidently say that you are honestly one of the nicest people to ever exist. everyone is kind in someway or another so you probably hear me say this a lot in this post, im not lying when I say that but for you seriously I can 1000% say that you are so genuinely considerate, not to mention really pretty, and great at photography/writing 💖

@phandomsandbandoms ty for being such a funny, witty, relatable and overall amazing person. your taste of music is one everyone should aspire to, not to mention your personality and sense of humour !! basically you’re goals tbh 👌

@glittering-litter i can relate way too much to you honestly you have all the tøp (yes I went there) notch memes and literally such a good music taste !! ty for always listening to me annoyingly talk about phan and emo bands whenever we talk hah you’re really great 🙌

@lestersdog ty for making the gc and Tumblr itself just a generally better place, you’re so nice and easy to talk to !!! your kindness and awesomeness is appreciated by me and so many others 💓 also your pride selfies were actually the cutest thing ive ever seen oml

@pasteldoothowell we haven’t talked one on one, but seriously from what i can tell when you talk in the gc you are a really fun person to be around !! ty for just your general awesome presence i feel blessed 😄

@peachou okay so we don’t really talk on private chat but seriously this may come off as creepy but i love your blog so so much and for you to actually follow me and like my posts blows me away !! you are so talented and i just wanna ty for being really amazing 💟

@softiednp this whole group chat, incase i missed someone individually, means the world to me tysm for everything you all are great people that i absolutely love talking to !!! you don’t even know how much i love y'all !! oml 😩👌

honourable (mostly) mutual mentions that i stalk and admire from afar: (pls feel free to message me seriously you’re all super cool) @wispyphil @fringegaps @florallylester @phanamored @philester @disgustinglygay @stardustphan @hazyphil @macaronidan @decaffeinated-shipper @yodastolemylightsaber @femtastico @britishteacup98 @lozzyg @lost-boy-ben @nonbinary-lester @suchaderp @sparklephil @adorkablephil @astronautdan @clouds-howell @shittywerewolfstudent @fallinghowell @opinionated-internet @stumpostar @tea-and-cozy-idek @purepastelphan @dansforeheadcurl @japhannie @eli-howlter

if i missed anyone pls punch me, chances are i either wrote you on my list but accidentally missed typing it out bc there’s so many names or literally thought we weren’t mutuals bc you are too cool to be following me :))

My only wish is that when donald trump puts his hand on the bible to be sworn in, it instantly catches fire. Not the bible itself, but his hand. 

3

Sketch dump! I might do something more with those Halloween ones though. Maybe…

Edit: Whoops! I forgot to add the Lui+Delirious+baby!Vanoss pic!

anonymous asked:

as a num. 1 markjin blog, can you recommend some of your fave markjin blog for me. 😆🙏 thank you in advance. God bless you.

jfksljfds pls!!!!! thank u so much im honestly just a mess of a blog but tysm ok here are my fave fellow markjin shippers!! (they aren’t markjin focused blogs like they blog got7, bts, mx etc but i know that they like markjin!)

@floaty-glasses @jubiesjinson @jjjaebum @sooljalee @blessjinyoung @4redlips @jinyounguie @wonhoshardnips @jinyoungs-paradise @lemon-amethyst @got7savedkpop @umma-jy @cutepimook @lovemarkjin @jypnior